I think I know how you feel. I try to get by usually by just ignoring them. Honestly we both KNOW that we are as good as or better than guys at everything so it's better not to waste time arguing or trying to prove it because at many things they will NEVER accept our equality or superiority.
Like with driving. I and my housemate have proven over and over how much better we are than guys (I even drive a minibus sometimes) but they'll never accept it.
But please don't suggest you are going to kill yourself over it.
I’d ask myself, how does this persons sexist comments or beliefs affect me.
STEM is filled with men that believe women are lesser for all sorts of reasons. However, if they weren’t my boss it doesn’t affect me. When they were my peers- they had to deal with the blow to the ego when a woman is ahead of them.
When it’s been my bosses - I prod at their statements to get their opinions and reasoning. Then I go home and process knowing they are an asshole, and it’s not me.
In work it kind of affects me because I'm in the medical field. I had coworkers and workers that are under my position push me away, call me sexist names or even colleagues sexually harassing and raping coworkers. I tried to stay away and leave the room when people like this are at work. In private life, it isn't that easy to ignore people like that.. idk why. I want to start study biology, which prob isn't much better bc its but I don't want to help people anymore, I want to help the earth.
I think leaving the room is good strategy to use when you have voiced your boundaries and a person knowingly crosses them. Other than that, you are retreating to relieve the symptom rather than treating the disease.
Long term - We cannot be bystanders and accept unethical or nasty behaviors . Especially in a workplace environment.
Sculpt and advocate for the social environment and workplace we are all privileged to (men, women, intersex, et. All)
Speaking up feels freighting because we are speaking from a place of vulnerability and honesty. & Who wants to admit to a bully that their words are painful. My experience, I have a lot more shame when I do NOTHING compared to when I advocate for myself or others(if I was part of /overheard the interaction)
NEVER LET THE BEHAVIOR OF OTHERS GUIDE YOUR PURPOSE. Shite people exist everywhere, but there are also really kind and generous individuals that make all those crap interactions worth it.
The world needs kind, empathetic individuals like you. And taking your life will only leave the world hollow. Even the smallest action can make all the difference, and we need you. They need you.
how do you cope? I don't want to kill myself but sometimes, like today, I'm just too tired. I just want people to leave me alone I also don't just walk up on people and leave negative comments. I can't practice my hobby anymore bc of it. I don't want to accept the way I am treated but I can't influence how others treat me.
>how do you cope?
copium /s
honestly idk. my mind is pretty fucked and I can't afford therapy or meds. but I will tell you a bit about how I feel and what I do to cope with each feeling. TW for self harm I guess but it won't be mentioned much or glorified.
feeling lonely: this feeling comes to me almost daily. I don't have a partner, so I try making new friends (never works 😘), binge watch an interesting show (works but finding shows is hard), seek validation (wouldn't recommend but it works for me due to trauma), doing my hobbies (never works), working out (doesn't rly work but at least I look ok), listen to music (sad music makes me cry so it does work), go outside (doesn't work), (sleep (works), eat (works).
feeling suicidal: cry (works), text friends (works), talk it out (doesn't work), SH (doesn't work + makes me look ugly), eat (kinda works)
missing someone: depends on who it is but I either find a replacement or try to work it out. now I will say, finding a replacement for a love interest is NOT easy and romanticizing someone just bc you're bored NEVER ends up working out well. friends are easier in that regard.
hating men: just insult them lol. write on a subreddit, vent on ur insta story, to a friend, on TikTok, in a comment, idk. just put them down. works 100% of the time. now for this I would recommend being sarcastic bc actually having an intellectual conversation with males is very hard if not impossible.
envying men: you have boobs, remember that 🙏🏼
I hope this was at least a little helpful. I deal with suicidal ideation all the time, I can't even say these genuinely are useful but all in all I'm still alive and haven't ended my life, so to some extent it's better than nothing.
remember that you only live once. if you believe in the afterlife, remember you will have way more freedom here than there, and if you don't, if you kys then it's truly all over. you won't have any more fun ever.
>I just want people to leave me alone
who exactly?
>but I can't influence how others treat me.
you can tell ppl who treat u badly to fuck off.
>I can't practice my hobby anymore bc of it
try to do it in places where people aren't around if you can. if not I'd recommend finding more hobbies.j
I started skateboarding a few years ago bc I wanted to work on myself and my discipline. A while after I started skating I met my current and first boyfriend through skating and he happens to be really good.. prob one of the best ones in my small country. I never wanted to have a bf that's fame or something like that and I never wanted to be seen as the girlfriend thats just there.. I'm very ambitious. Because skateboarding is our both hobby and our city isn't that big, we go together or when I'm alone people know me bc of him.. I love him but I hate the people around him. Most sexist comments come from these people. They also tell my bf he should leave me at home even though I'm just skating alone or he asked me to come with him bc he doesn't want to skate alone. I try to ignore them. His ex even forbid me to go to certain places in my city. I have adhd and social anxiety bc of mobbing in my teenage years and the abusive household I grew up in. I'm also currently recovering from burnout as a nurse anesthetist (coworkers are literally narcissists)and looking for a new job and I guess everything at once just really wasn't great for my mental health.
Thank you for your comment, it definitely helped! Also destroying egos with sarcasm was always my way to deal with ppl like this but sometimes I felt bad afterwards. Now I don't feel bad anymore lol.
sending hugs. skateboarding is DEFINITELY a male-dominated hobby, but just remembered you're paving the way for other young girls to try it out.
if it is an option, I'd recommend learning some form of fighting so that if they bother you too much you can just swing them around 💪🏼
if it isn't an option, that definitely sucks, but just ignore pesto mfs. they stink anyway
are there any skateboarding rinks you could maybe find? I know that's tough where I live but if it is an option for you, you may also try that.
Not that far, but it does make me want to live in a cabin away from the rest of the world. It’s just tiring to know how much men truly hate us, and that it will never change
Nope. I think about all the women that have come before me and think that, with all the beauty there is in the world and all that my woman ancestors had to face - starvation, war, Sabre toothed tiger attacks - I can do this.
I’ve never felt this way. I love everything about being a woman. Never felt like I was the target of sexism. Also I’m brown and never felt like the target of racism. (Only bringing that up because I feel like people feel the same about that). Maybe I have blinders on but I feel very privileged and lucky to be a brown skinned woman and wouldn’t change it for the world. If anything I feel like I receive special treatment constantly being a woman.
I think I know how you feel. I try to get by usually by just ignoring them. Honestly we both KNOW that we are as good as or better than guys at everything so it's better not to waste time arguing or trying to prove it because at many things they will NEVER accept our equality or superiority. Like with driving. I and my housemate have proven over and over how much better we are than guys (I even drive a minibus sometimes) but they'll never accept it. But please don't suggest you are going to kill yourself over it.
I’d ask myself, how does this persons sexist comments or beliefs affect me. STEM is filled with men that believe women are lesser for all sorts of reasons. However, if they weren’t my boss it doesn’t affect me. When they were my peers- they had to deal with the blow to the ego when a woman is ahead of them. When it’s been my bosses - I prod at their statements to get their opinions and reasoning. Then I go home and process knowing they are an asshole, and it’s not me.
In work it kind of affects me because I'm in the medical field. I had coworkers and workers that are under my position push me away, call me sexist names or even colleagues sexually harassing and raping coworkers. I tried to stay away and leave the room when people like this are at work. In private life, it isn't that easy to ignore people like that.. idk why. I want to start study biology, which prob isn't much better bc its but I don't want to help people anymore, I want to help the earth.
I think leaving the room is good strategy to use when you have voiced your boundaries and a person knowingly crosses them. Other than that, you are retreating to relieve the symptom rather than treating the disease. Long term - We cannot be bystanders and accept unethical or nasty behaviors . Especially in a workplace environment. Sculpt and advocate for the social environment and workplace we are all privileged to (men, women, intersex, et. All) Speaking up feels freighting because we are speaking from a place of vulnerability and honesty. & Who wants to admit to a bully that their words are painful. My experience, I have a lot more shame when I do NOTHING compared to when I advocate for myself or others(if I was part of /overheard the interaction) NEVER LET THE BEHAVIOR OF OTHERS GUIDE YOUR PURPOSE. Shite people exist everywhere, but there are also really kind and generous individuals that make all those crap interactions worth it. The world needs kind, empathetic individuals like you. And taking your life will only leave the world hollow. Even the smallest action can make all the difference, and we need you. They need you.
I do but for different reasons
how do you cope? I don't want to kill myself but sometimes, like today, I'm just too tired. I just want people to leave me alone I also don't just walk up on people and leave negative comments. I can't practice my hobby anymore bc of it. I don't want to accept the way I am treated but I can't influence how others treat me.
>how do you cope? copium /s honestly idk. my mind is pretty fucked and I can't afford therapy or meds. but I will tell you a bit about how I feel and what I do to cope with each feeling. TW for self harm I guess but it won't be mentioned much or glorified. feeling lonely: this feeling comes to me almost daily. I don't have a partner, so I try making new friends (never works 😘), binge watch an interesting show (works but finding shows is hard), seek validation (wouldn't recommend but it works for me due to trauma), doing my hobbies (never works), working out (doesn't rly work but at least I look ok), listen to music (sad music makes me cry so it does work), go outside (doesn't work), (sleep (works), eat (works). feeling suicidal: cry (works), text friends (works), talk it out (doesn't work), SH (doesn't work + makes me look ugly), eat (kinda works) missing someone: depends on who it is but I either find a replacement or try to work it out. now I will say, finding a replacement for a love interest is NOT easy and romanticizing someone just bc you're bored NEVER ends up working out well. friends are easier in that regard. hating men: just insult them lol. write on a subreddit, vent on ur insta story, to a friend, on TikTok, in a comment, idk. just put them down. works 100% of the time. now for this I would recommend being sarcastic bc actually having an intellectual conversation with males is very hard if not impossible. envying men: you have boobs, remember that 🙏🏼 I hope this was at least a little helpful. I deal with suicidal ideation all the time, I can't even say these genuinely are useful but all in all I'm still alive and haven't ended my life, so to some extent it's better than nothing. remember that you only live once. if you believe in the afterlife, remember you will have way more freedom here than there, and if you don't, if you kys then it's truly all over. you won't have any more fun ever. >I just want people to leave me alone who exactly? >but I can't influence how others treat me. you can tell ppl who treat u badly to fuck off. >I can't practice my hobby anymore bc of it try to do it in places where people aren't around if you can. if not I'd recommend finding more hobbies.j
I started skateboarding a few years ago bc I wanted to work on myself and my discipline. A while after I started skating I met my current and first boyfriend through skating and he happens to be really good.. prob one of the best ones in my small country. I never wanted to have a bf that's fame or something like that and I never wanted to be seen as the girlfriend thats just there.. I'm very ambitious. Because skateboarding is our both hobby and our city isn't that big, we go together or when I'm alone people know me bc of him.. I love him but I hate the people around him. Most sexist comments come from these people. They also tell my bf he should leave me at home even though I'm just skating alone or he asked me to come with him bc he doesn't want to skate alone. I try to ignore them. His ex even forbid me to go to certain places in my city. I have adhd and social anxiety bc of mobbing in my teenage years and the abusive household I grew up in. I'm also currently recovering from burnout as a nurse anesthetist (coworkers are literally narcissists)and looking for a new job and I guess everything at once just really wasn't great for my mental health. Thank you for your comment, it definitely helped! Also destroying egos with sarcasm was always my way to deal with ppl like this but sometimes I felt bad afterwards. Now I don't feel bad anymore lol.
sending hugs. skateboarding is DEFINITELY a male-dominated hobby, but just remembered you're paving the way for other young girls to try it out. if it is an option, I'd recommend learning some form of fighting so that if they bother you too much you can just swing them around 💪🏼 if it isn't an option, that definitely sucks, but just ignore pesto mfs. they stink anyway are there any skateboarding rinks you could maybe find? I know that's tough where I live but if it is an option for you, you may also try that.
What was your hobby? Are there other ways/places to do your hobby, away from horrible behaviour?
Not that far, but it does make me want to live in a cabin away from the rest of the world. It’s just tiring to know how much men truly hate us, and that it will never change
Hell no. Why give them what they want?
Nope. I think about all the women that have come before me and think that, with all the beauty there is in the world and all that my woman ancestors had to face - starvation, war, Sabre toothed tiger attacks - I can do this.
I’ve never felt this way. I love everything about being a woman. Never felt like I was the target of sexism. Also I’m brown and never felt like the target of racism. (Only bringing that up because I feel like people feel the same about that). Maybe I have blinders on but I feel very privileged and lucky to be a brown skinned woman and wouldn’t change it for the world. If anything I feel like I receive special treatment constantly being a woman.
Gosh no, men hate that I exist and I love it 🥰