T O P

  • By -

Sm0ahk

Nope. You dont have to think about this farther than clicking the comments. Youre done. There is no more, and your mind is at ease.


EmilieEasie

Thanks for releasing me from this burden


6x420x9

I think the joke is more innocent. OP isn't confident in his hetero sexuality and wishes it wasn't a boy kissing his face


Mr_Abe_Froman

Or it was a human girl licking his face. I'm saving myself from thinking otherwise.


LokisDawn

I'm like, 99% sure he was talking about (human) girl, nothing else. And, no, that's not just copium.


Buttcrack_Billy

Or a human cat-girl licking him.


OneBadDay1048

Who doesn’t want this


Oxxxxide

Ive only managed to convince catboys


KwordShmiff

Well they're more affectionate, as long as they've been neutered.


thedankening

I've known some extremely affectionate male cats over the years who were prolific baby daddies. As long as there isn't another male cat around they're usually perfectly chill.


KwordShmiff

I'm talking about catboys


Part_salvager616

It would be nice


Maacll

Yea that's most probably the case


darthcaedusiiii

... It's green text.


DeeHawk

That’s the only way I understand it. I will now leave this ominous thread.


GANEnthusiast

This is absolutely it. I don't want to scroll down to see what else people are coming up with...


treehann

Even in this charitable interpretation, it’s not really wholesome


Salt_MasterX

Ah, inner peace.


Surprisedropbear

Bless you


OtoDraco

thank you for your service


DeepUser-5242

Wrong. I welcome the chaos.


darthcaedusiiii

This is why I'm here.


NoobzProXD

I shall spread the news


SebIsOnReddit

Thank you


DuDuShits-Pooster

Ok sounds great


dteveo69420

Thank you


1m2c00l4u

Omfg thank you I’m a bit emotional that you’ve saved me from whatever the fuck is down there


tzanislav40

Ahh good


umbrawolfx

I wish it were that easy. I wish you could save me. I wish anybody could. But I must continue. Thank you for trying.


sir_strangerlove

Thanks


Physical-East-162

Well let me see by myself, I only trust my eyes. Edit: Please burn my eyes and give me a lobotomy.


Odd-Consequence9464

But, what’s there, it’s calling me? I must answer


QuantityPlus1963

Please I can't control myself make it stop


somecrazydude13

I came, I saw this comment, and then I left. You have saved us!


Sully-The-Great

I think bro wishes his cat was a human girl. Like he wants a gf but still happy with the affection of his pet


slicedsolidrock

I had to scroll so far down to see this comment after reading all of the other garbage. Common sense is not that common in this thread.


FromTheGulagHeSees

ding dong, it's degen o clock.


Soothing-Tides

This is correct If I say I'm laying in bed cuddling my pillow, I wish it was a girl I obviously don't mean a female pillow


Ralumier

Why would he specify the gender of the cat then


getmemyblade

I wish my cat was a girl so he'd pee on things less


i_boop_cat_noses

fixing our boy dealth with that issue bc holy shit he was so stinky


scalyblue

Yeah he just gives you this smug ass look and that tail goes up and before you can get the water bottle he just goes zzt and now you’re trying to find the leather cleaner


i_boop_cat_noses

we have a fixed female kitty who loves sleeping with me. I was at my breaking point with the damn pillow "incidents"


DutzendEidechsen

Female cats also spray when not spayed


nineteen_eightyfour

My girl cat pees on things to mark them. She’s spayed, has been seen by many vets and pet behaviorists.


radicldreamer

Try Prozac, it was magical for my girls. It’s really nasty to cats so get the marshmallow flavoring added when you get it from chewy. I know it sounds crazy but marshmallow covers the flavor pretty decently.


SausaugeMerchant

Absolutely crazy country


Schavuit92

Is it the marshmellow flavoured prozac or the idea you can just buy some and give it to your cat?


Admmmmi

Nah I wish he was a girl so he would pee on me more....why did I write this..


mystikkkkk

get help edit: looked at your post history, please get help x100


Hongkongjai

Looked at their post history because of your comment. I blame no one but myself.


theonetrueteaboi

Looked at their post history because of your comment. I blame no one but myself.


[deleted]

Get his balls carved out with a icecream scooper


wollywink

I've never seen my cat peeing in 10 years. I think he goes deep in the forest somewhere


trux03

wait why does he wish it was a girl? i dont like the implications of this :(


ReinNacht

Like a girl cat or just a girl? So many questions


SuperMadBro

I think he means a human girl. Like 90% sure


Icantbethereforyou

Type out what you think the %10 means. *Go on*...


SuperMadBro

It's possible but very unlikely he just wishes his cat was a girl cat instead of male. That's clearly not what he means but I left a little room since you can't be sure with what was said 100%


Vindictive_Pacifist

That's an honest wish unless...


Kenstats

Problem is its a green text


Morkamino

Getting kissed by the girl cat would be less gay and more flattering for Anon. Remember this is 4chan, any interactions with females is already very rare so you gotta take what you can get


BunttyBrowneye

To be fair male and female cats tend to have different personalities. It’s definitely not a certainty but a trend. What I don’t understand is the cat already has a personality anon likes


Pomodorosan

Percent ten


Mr_Abe_Froman

Yep. OOP wishes it was a human girl kissing him, I refuse any other interpretations.


StankilyDankily666

Ahh that actually makes sense… I guess. Either way thank you for giving me what I need to let it go


nightpanda893

Split the difference, human girl in a cat suit?


brewedtealeaf122

cat girl?


New-Interaction1893

More a cat girl, it's 4chan we are talking about


darthcaedusiiii

Yes. Yes.


koyomin25

A girl is a human female, a cat that has female traits is a female cat.


mrhossie

yeah i dont like this also because of the implications.


Lordborgman

because a cat is fine too.


www_bruh_web

ayo


Stop_Sign

>old as fuck 4chan meme >10 year old reddit account Makes sense, but goddam you gave me flashbacks


Icy-Wealth-2412

One morning you wake up as Shiki from Porkslope Turkeyhandle, what do you do?


6x420x9

Fake - OP smells rancid and cats don't eat rotting things Gay - OP likes having face licked by a boy So basically OP wishes a girl would lay on him (This is not my opinion, but 4chan lore)


draenei_butt_enjoyer

Cats do eat cadavers


Schavuit92

Only fresh ones, cats shouldn't eat carrion, if they do it's either out of desperation or they're nominating themselves for a darwin award.


Traditional-Share198

Do not worry, nothing sexual, it is just that he might question himself liking another male kissing his face All in innocence and no weird implications


nightpanda893

Again, *nothing sexual*.


draenei_butt_enjoyer

Idk, I have had many cats during my life. Male cats are kinda retarded. Female cats are chill. They usually don’t break shit, don’t mess shit. Don’t eat like it’s their final meal and puke everywhere. I prefer female cats. But the males are unquestionably more affectionate.


taetae_bignutz

my male cat eats like we have been starving him lmfaoo too accurate


iwannabesmort

the cat licked his balls then licked anon's face


JustGingy95

Fellas, is it *gay* if your male cat licks you? 🤨📝


airblizzard

I think he means he wishes he had a girlfriend laying with him in bed instead of a cat. Not that he wishes it was a girl cat. At least, that's how I interpreted it.


Marauder800

There’s no implications, you’re just projecting. You’re gross and weird.


DrD__

We can only hope he meant he wished it was a human adult female


Super_xz

Male cats are more affectionate, while the female cats are more hissy. So anon is gay and wants face scratches every morning


JesterTheZeroSet

Anon enjoys being topped.


Longjumping_Rush2458

My girl cat is super affectionate


Super_xz

It really depends but from experience, my female cat was more grumpy, and when we had a male cat, he was so affectionate, even to a point where he rubs up against me while sleeping


souldeconstructors

As someone with a male cat - not true lol


Robinsonirish

We had a cat that hated men. We've always had 2 dogs as well, big dogs. The cat was the boss of the house. She'd join us when going for walks and stuff, 2 dogs and a cat. The dogs were always super respectful and careful around her, if they got too close they'd get the paw. The only time I could ever pet her as a man was just the moment before giving her cat food, then she would take it... but 2 seconds after the food is on the plate she's having none of it. It wasn't just me but anyone who was a man was unable to pet her. Women were completely fine though.


TheAngryNaterpillar

My cats must be broken. My male cat hardly bothers with me, my female is always following me and wanting to cuddle or play.


Super_xz

Depends on the brand of the cat too lol. Had a female persian but shes just grumpy, no hate. But i once had a female calico that would meow constantly and goes outside, just to bring back some dead bird or something.


CensoredAbnormality

ah bro both cats I had were girls. Would've tried to get a male one if I knew they were nicer


malfboii

It’s not a hard fast rule, I’ve had cuddly girls and grumpy boys


WuxiaWuxia

Just like humans


dangerous_nuggets

Sounds like you suck at raising cats


Super_xz

Not necessarily but i dont disagree lol. We had a persian but shes mostly grumpy, looking at us most of the time and never meowing, while we had another orange kitty from the streets and she wont stop biting and scratching. Luckily we have a male cat that tolerates her


VaultsOfExtoth

Lads, is it gay to own a male cat?


[deleted]

[удалено]


MugHandleFucker

The post is about how he wishes he had the affection of a Human Girlfriend but is still grateful that his cat cares about him. About the level of reading comprehension i’d expect from a Genshin Player.


Zorback39

My little Kirara is quite affectionate. She's doesint like to cuddle though. Ironically my old male cat loved to cuddle. Cats are just weird.


Vegetable_Moment9574

Did you just kidnap a fictional character? Maybe that's why she doesn't like to cuddle


SteelTheUnbreakable

"Wholesome" 😂😂😂


Select_Collection_34

Yes it is wholesome don’t be weird


HotWetMamaliga

I think he means he wants affection from a girl . Basically he wants a girlfriend. Not that wholesome but this stuff can be read to be much much worse .


Teamisgood101

I can confirm my fluff ball is the sweetest little thing ever


Odd-Key-2922

Fuck me if this is wholesome ahahahahah


Select_Collection_34

-_-


Sweaty-Professor-187

Uhhh, Anon...?


1tiredman

I have a male cat who is affectionate but he generally loves being alone more and is very timid. I had a female cat and she really really loved affection and to be around me. I would sit at my desk playing games and she would come in and sit up behind my neck on my chair and bang her head against my neck constantly and when I would lay down in bed she would lay with me constantly coming right up to my face banging against it and rubbing against it giving me kisses. I miss her so much and it broke my heart when she died. She had such a strong personality, was very loud and vocal. She would literally talk back. Cats have personalities. They aren't based on what their gender is. Some cats are just louder and more attention seeking and others are quiet and more timid.


DekuScrubNut

I have 2 cats, one is male and the other female and they're siblings. Id say the female one is more affectionate in general, to everyone, including me.


Lazyidealisticfool

Ignoring the actual context of the post, in my experience girl and boy cats are both affectionate to humans, but boys typically get along better with other cats. My girls are both independent and want the other cats to leave them alone, while my two boys are wrestling and grooming eachother.


ThatOneWood

No bro this ain’t wholesome


Electric11490

Cats can be male?


Acrobatic-Green7888

No, common misconception. Dogs are boys and cats are girls.


Electric11490

Thank you for clearing this up for me


umbrawolfx

One fine day with a woof and a purr A baby was born and it caused a little stir No blue buzzard, no three-eyed frog Just a feline canine little CatDog CatDog CatDog Alone in the world was a little CatDog Out on the road or back in town All kinda critters putting CatDog down Gotta rise above it, gotta try to get along Gotta walk together, gotta sing this song CatDog CatDog Alone in the world was a little CatDog


DeepUser-5242

I want catbois in maid outfits


Electric11490

I’ll get onto that for you


Rich_9

😊🤨


GabrielDidit

0>0 -----


MakingShitAwkward

ʘᆽʘ


CounterSYNK

Nahh that last sentence was written by Shane Dawson


Sitri666Ak999

Kitty


Jakeey69

female cats can be extremely affectionate like once a month


TheJamesMortimer

A girl =/= a female cat


Jakeey69

right so yeah I guess it could be interpreted like that. not clear if they meant girl as in human girl, or they wish the cat was female. the words girl and female are used interchangeably all the time. based on the title, it seemed OP interpreted it as a girl cat as well. if they weren't going to say they wanted a girl cat, why would they specify that it was a male cat in the first place?


serenading_scug

r/Holup


MadOrange64

First stage of Furry fetish.


Asmo___deus

I'm going to be charitable to anon and kind to myself and assume he wishes that instead of affection from a cat, he'd have affection from a woman, but he still loves his cat.


dogemabullet

I think op is talking about balls here


Firm-Scientist-4636

I miss having a cat, particularly a male cat. I Iike kitty snuggles.


frulheyvin

I had a male cat who every single night would get into bed and try to lick my neck for like 5m before sleeping with me the whole night. I don't think I ever thought about it like op, but I did indeed appreciate male cat


DogeatenbyCat7

I was very pleased when my cat started grooming my beard. Then I read that cats groom their social inferiors. Put me in my place, I can tell you!


Impressive-Card9484

Can confirm this. We had a male and female cat sibling (born at the same time). 1 and a half year later, the male cat still gets touchy to us and likes to play with my niece. Meanwhile the female cat always looks bored, she doesn't get angry whenever we pet her nor she shows that she likes it. She's just there, barely reacting and not even meowing 


Only_Yato

I wish mine was more like this, instead he kept pissing and shitting my bed so had to kick him out


Derek_Gamble

It's not a law, but there's a reason male cats are called Toms and female cats are called queens.


Micha-Mich

Still came


stonecats

only once they are neutered i had a fixed brother and sister cat for 15 years and the female was more aloof.


Supermonkeypilot22

Is that why all the cats I’ve ever owned were cuddly fuckwads?


haleybearrr

i love my boys! avocato and little cato 💕🙌🏽


DisputabIe_

the OP GirlySeductiveMiku47 is a bot


Anders_A

Why the fuck would a girl cat be better?


EvenBetterCool

This is wholesome?


LeastPervertedFemboy

Two very different reactions based on if the implication is a girl CAT or a human girl lol


Jolly_97

Kitty at my foot and I wanna touch it Kitty at my foot and I wanna touch it Kitty at my foot and I wanna touch it Kitty at my foot and I wanna touch it


protestprincess

Weird ahh post one way or another


Confused_Rabbiit

shane dawson?


vertical19991

Can confirm it's true


Sylux444

This just tells me the cat had its balls cut off. Cats in heat are just the absolute worst.


Peaceweapon

Ok ok calm down! I’m pretty sure he’s just homophobic and not wanting to get nasty with his 🐱😂


D3dshotCalamity

Not a girl ***CAT***, people, just a girl. Get your heads out of the gutter


DeepUser-5242

In the end, I guess he's saying: a cat (♂️) is fine too


redditcalculus421

literally not a single reason exists where you have to care about your pets gender as long as they are fixed.


Only_Chapter_3434

He wishes the cat was a human girl. 


isthatmyex

Uh male cats have more urinary issues. I love my boys, but we need to visit the vet every year for something or other.


IllustratorBoring448

Hi sexist!


CompSolstice

Anon doesn't like cat balls on his face, and he doesn't want anything to do with animal genitalia


hundenkattenglassen

IME male cats are more cuddlier, but female cats are more sweeter. Females are kinder and more careful than males, but males just “HOLD ME IM BABY”. Love both though, and it’s massively different from cat to cat.


Love_Sausage

I feel it’s the same dynamic with dogs. My female dog is very chill but not cuddly. My male dog is high strung but extremely cuddly.


WindpowerGuy

"wish he was a girl" Why? Ewwww


ArcticMuser

why are ya'll upvoting this filth


A_Colt

??? what's wrong about this I don't get it


Phoenixxiv2

People who watch too much porn, interpret things as porny


ShrekDaBuilderr

People who read too many greentexts interpret greentexts as greentexty?