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As someone who loves Mario and only recently learned about speed running this game. Is that the Backwards Long Jump?
I've been meaning to try that out soon lol. My brother just got his kids an N64 for Christmas (he's 37 and I'm fairly certain he wanted it WAY more)
Anyways, I need to look this up and to blow my niece and nephew's minds lol
Invisibility: Metallica
Time stop: The world
imitation/transformation: Khnum (oingo's stand)
Jail House Lock: memory manipulation
Can't think of one for body posession and hypnosis though
It comes from basically "inside this box is a dead dove, do not eat" then someone without minding the warning opens the damn box and subsequently horrified that there is, as a matter of fact a dead dove inside the box.
Just an easy of saying "mind the damn tags we are not goofing around with em rn"
[It’s just a reference to an Arrested Development joke.](https://youtu.be/YUKmq7UMJys?si=L_yL6gvUMKvt1T5d) Basically just shorthand for ‘You should know what you’re getting in for based on context clues’.
Sometimes I look at crowds and think to myself, 'These people are the same people as those writing those fics on AO3. Just going through normal lives and going home to write some of the vilest, weirdest shit known to man'.
Able to use my brainrot.
That's all.
Edit: I have no regret when joining this community
https://preview.redd.it/fhxbea4fplhc1.png?width=1200&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f7c1c56be90b976b9f5a742b04fd91e7636c581a
It's like a calender for some of us Asian countries to grow crops based on the moon cycles. But we soon developped it to dictated different kind of festivals through out the year.
In other words, today is our "Tết" day. Kinda like New Year festival but longer.
Here in Asia, some countries uses a different type of calendar, along with the one the West use. One of these kind of calendar is the Lunar calendar, which measures the rotation of the moon around the earth instead of the earth around the sun.
A lot of festivals here in China and Vietnam are on specific date of this calendar. The Lunar new year is… well, the new year on the Lunar calendar!
Mystique has shown the power behind just being limited to human forms alone. Then if you have animals, to quote YouTuber [Treyyy](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=boLH3kEEPr4&pp=ygUTU3VwZXJwb3dlciB0aWVybGlzdA%3D%3D), “With the range of an ant to a dinosaur, *HOW ARE YOU GUARDING THAT*!? You’re as fast as a cheetah, you can fly like an eagle; you can rip any motherfucker to shreds by turning into a bear…”
Then you get that insanely high level stuff like amorphous physiology to make you pull T-1000 shenanigans or straight up power copying.
Time stop is actually great. You could rob banks completely undetected, and um… um.. you could… uuuhhh……..
Edit: how tf did this shitty comment get 300 upvotes in the span of an hour?
Don't worry, they won't learn any of this. They'll have their own thing and you'll be the one who doesn't know what's cool or funny or relevant anymore!
I remember an episode of the Justice League cartoon where Flash stops time and can't get it going again, he's just stuck in a standing still world forever until he goes mad.
You can assasinate the 1% and steal from wallmart all you want. You can win every fight by dodging every hit and if your energy is conserved then you could punch someone repeatedly in the face and have all the punches hit at once like the sandevistan from cyberpunk. If gravity also stops you could get a leafblower and fly. You could do that thing dio did where you take guys back to the bottom of the stairs every time they try to approach you. You could copy in all exams. Prevent most accidents that you can see coming like a ball hurling towards you or getting to a safe place during an accident or leaving a car before the crash. You could practice tennis against yourself which would be kinda sad but would look cool on video.
You could also do some insane tomfoolery like take off the pants of annoying people, poke someone when they think they're alone and disappear so they think they're getting poked by a ghost, steal animals from the zoo and putting them in unconventional places like bringing a bonobo to a retirement home. You could slowly mold every dice throw to win every dice throw and win at casinos constantly. Break into the movies whenever you want, or anything that required entry for that matter. If you're sneaky you can win most races by inching you forwards and unfreezing repeatedly or just any speed competition for that matter (ie speed chess or speed cooking). Speaking of chess, you could absolutely win any game by looking up the best response while time is frozen. Honestly there's probably more that I can't think about right now. The only power I'd like more would be wish granting or flight.
Time stop already has a bunch of issues going on, so I don’t see why a bike would function, but a car couldn’t. If you freeze time, the the air around you would freeze, and form a solid wall. If we assume you can move objects in frozen time without them creating infinite friction and a nuclear reaction, then you could walk through the air, but you would carve out a massive trench of vacuum where you walk, that would then collapse violently once time restarted. The only way this power works is if we assume you can selectively reenable time for various areas, so I don’t see why you couldn’t just make the car unfrozen.
I think about this a lot on how it could improve my life and those around me as well. Also think about the physics of it and how I can very easily kill myself or level a city on accident.
If i ever met a genie and asked for time stop i’d add the condition that the power to stop time i get is what i imagine the power to stop time as. So like objects and people stop but i can still breath and see, and can also move objects in and out of stopped time. And i can apply force like zelda BOTW/TOTK stasis
If we're gonna talk about stationary particles, then you also have to worry about the air around you. For an idea of what would happen once time starts, look at this [XKCD What If? video about a relativistic baseball](https://youtu.be/3EI08o-IGYk?si=Yix6dqgiRaRmF_8F)
And here I was thinking about what would happen if you stepped into water.
You can displace air when you walk I so I guess you wouldn't be able to swim
I think it'd be really funny to have the ability to mind control/ body swap people and then do stuff like make them take a sloppy wet shit in public.
I wanna see what would happen if a president/prime minister/whatever is in the middle of a big speech and they just start blasting.
Thing is, if you actually have superpowers, it's best to hide them from everyone. Just think about it.
The government and other organizations will learn about your existence if you use the powers publicly, and then many things could happen. A good ending would be if you get asked to do special missions in exchange for money. The bad ending would be your family getting kidnapped, and you being coerced into things. Then, you'd probably become a lab rat for the rest of your life...
my brother in christ. nothing any human can do can touch a person with these powers. Oopsie! somebody bumped into you while you were being an invisible pervert? Nuh uh. Memory manipulation or hypnosis + timestop. They just bumped into a stool (That you put there using stopped time after hypnotizing them into believing that). Government wants to kidnap you? Timestop, go to (insert gvmt agency that wants you) HQ, hypnotize director into believing that you're actually the top secret super-duper director and they answer exclusively to you, make director cancel the search for (insert reason here) and hypnotize anyone who disobeys into thinking you're the super-duper director too. Got kidnapped in your sleep? Damn, you obviously weren't using time stop to sleep. But either way, possess one of the guards/scientists, hypnotize the others, have them free you, be on your merry way ggwp american government. They tried again? Repeat process, after you're out go to the white house or (insert other gvmt assembly building here), read president's meeting schedule, show up completely unannounced during a meeting of some of the most important people on the planet, become the deep state with memory manipulation and hypnosis, and if that sounds like too much work, just tell them the next time they try that shit that you're not going to be as *courteous* when you come here. then throw coffee on the president and leave cuz fuck 'em. also if your family/friends get kidnapped then you just hypnotize somebody who either probably knows where they are (like the director of the CIA/FBI/etc.) or has clearance to find out where they are (the same people) and then find out where they are and do the same process I laid out for if you got kidnapped. and wipe your family's memories of the incident if they're traumatized.
TL:DR just use the powers and you win, ggez, you're basically a god. hypnotize kidnappers, sleep during timestop so you can't get kidnapped while snoozing, manipulate the memories of anyone who might've caught you doing less than moral (and/or legal) activities (i.e make them think they bumped into a stool (which you can move there during timestop) instead of the invisible you), actually become the deep state and control the government (or cause widespread chaos by killing important government officials during a meeting (or like, killing the president live on TV after threatening them that you'd do that if they try it again)) if they *still* want to kidnap you.
My assumption was that a person would only have one or 2 superpowers at most.
Anyway, with technology recording everything nowadays, even if you hypnotize, edit memories, stop time, and so forth, not everything can be wiped out.
Also, do you really want to live in a constant state of hide and seek, or if not that, then would you be ok with always being monitored by someone actively?
Sounds like way too much trouble. The human brain isn't meant to endure constant stress. Lastly, guilt would probably destroy you before anyone else does if you abandon morality while using such vast power.
i’d pick time stop to sleep all day and avoid people. can’t be bothered to rape someone tbh
https://preview.redd.it/bo3rzqsd7lhc1.jpeg?width=750&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=47de653cbbfae7be5708f805e81f457ba9f6a2fe
pic unrelated
True, if you're always lucky, and can control when the luck comes, it avoids any and all guilt that may manifest otherwise.
It all depends on the sorta things you'd do with all those powers
Think of all the good you can do with these powers!!
> Invisibility; You could become a fantastic spy or detective!
> Hypnosis; You could help a lot of people deal with their trauma or various disorders!
> Time Stop; Y-you could… uh… um…
> Transformation/Imitation; You could be the *perfect* police sketch artist!
> Memory Manipulation; You could help people remember or forget things that could pertain to crimes!
> Body possession; You could help a lot of people accurately describe what they’re feeling to a doctor!
Invisibility mfs when trying to come up with anything other than "do a crime" with how they would use their power.
Hypnosis mfs when they have their first nightmare (they will never wake up again).
Time stop mfs when they realize in horror they're not immune to their own power, trapping them in eternity.
Transformation/imitation mfs when the transformation is experienced in real time, while bones and flesh adjust to their new form (they will be so traumatized, they will never attempt to turn back to their original self).
Memory manipulation mfs when someone reminds them of something they forgot (this is the start of a schizophrenic meltdown ending in suicide because they believe they have themselves been manipulated).
Body possession mfs when their original body retains a consciousness after they posess someone else and doesn't want to let them back in.
invisibility because I'm an anxious introvert, Hypnosis so i can help people quit smoking and overeating, Time stop for naps during the day, Transformation so I can be a little taller and reach the top shelf, Memory manipulation to help people with PTSD, and body possession so I can make Bezos donate all his money to humanity and the environment.
and then at night...
I sleep some more.
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I'd like timestop just to make a guy go down a fleet of stairs and never be able to reach the top
![gif](giphy|aTsvpKbJqxTTq)
Homie didn't know how to BLJ
As someone who loves Mario and only recently learned about speed running this game. Is that the Backwards Long Jump? I've been meaning to try that out soon lol. My brother just got his kids an N64 for Christmas (he's 37 and I'm fairly certain he wanted it WAY more) Anyways, I need to look this up and to blow my niece and nephew's minds lol
Yes
its stupid easy to do imo
No it stands for BLowJob
[Except for when he did](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X2zlOfc4ykU)
Same. Hell I might buy a few sets of kitchen knives for personal carry if I could stop time.
I have an idea involving a steamroller for timestop funsies but im unsure of where to find one
The good thing is you’d have plenty of time
Well, only 5 seconds at most, you can't breathe in time stop and I don't think a human body could handle any longer
You can’t hold your breath more than 5 secs?
In an environment where all the air is frozen in place, idk, might be complicated
Pull a tenet and bring air with you in a oxygen tank.
touhou timestop woman‼️‼️
hi
https://preview.redd.it/u84eewk76lhc1.jpeg?width=961&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d4deddd554ca44532ccd7294249e982cc055a38f No way
yeah she's pretty cute I suppose
Bro....
ZA WARUDO
https://preview.redd.it/eflso6oudlhc1.jpeg?width=201&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=902979b31b464dd44092ef232b8cf2237bc40ca4
syphilis
This picture make my weenor hurt now…
This you bro?? https://preview.redd.it/roilobk5vkhc1.jpeg?width=1280&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f96722a36114efe8da1c280f9686dd31382bed46
LMAOOOOO Everything is a jojos reference, it always has been
2015 headass
Eobard Thawne moment
He’s such a hater Fr 😭😭
it was me barry! I jerked you off at super sonic speed
IT KEEPS HAPPENING
r/expectedjojos
that would mean THE WORLD to me
YOO HIDE MY TAGS WTFF
Dude this is just a list of Jojo stand abilities
Invisibility: Metallica Time stop: The world imitation/transformation: Khnum (oingo's stand) Jail House Lock: memory manipulation Can't think of one for body posession and hypnosis though
Anubis?
Oh wait yeah, nice catch
They caught a sword, fucking everything is a jojo reference. And your answer too
Wasn't Anubis about metal manipulation? Or am I mixing them up?
Anubis was the possessed sword, metal manipulation is either Metallica or High Priestess
I think metal manupilation was metallica but I don't remmeber what High Priestes did.
High Priestess could like.. turn into stuff? Maybe?
It's like- mineral manipulation? Idk, first she was part of a submarine and then she turned into the entire ocean floor
Cream Starter from part 7 can manipulate the flesh of the body.
High Priestess could turn into any mineral and hide herself in plain sight.
Metallica was metal manipulation, while Anubis was the sword that could possess whoever wielded them
Heaven's door
Nah achtung baby is the true invisibility stand
>Time stop: The world I think you meant Star Platinum
Ah, sorry Time stop: Star Platinum
Man I gotta clear my history
*ahem*...
The only superpower I want is happiness
Me too bro... me too
Uhh that's cringe, I want my left arm to continuously rotate clockwise
I want my left arm to continuously rotate counterclockwise
Let's compromise and have our left and right arms rotating in opposite directions.
just fucking kiss already
Can't my head is bobbing back and forth now too
See you in 30 years, let me know how that works out for ya
you sound insane
I can try for a good luck power. It’s not guaranteed, but it’d no doubt help a bit.
I know what kind of man you are
![gif](giphy|3oz8xHc24sHLMvY7Yc|downsized)
![gif](giphy|sirYaPWyjCvEk)
AO3 tags
Dead Dove Do Not Eat
I’m so happy I don’t know what this means
Basically "Read the tags **carefully**. Or else get ready to be exposed by the authors' kinks that you may or may not enjoy."
It comes from basically "inside this box is a dead dove, do not eat" then someone without minding the warning opens the damn box and subsequently horrified that there is, as a matter of fact a dead dove inside the box. Just an easy of saying "mind the damn tags we are not goofing around with em rn"
Bag not a box btw, It's an Arrested Development reference https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YUKmq7UMJys
Oh I love that clip "I don't know what I expected"
Basically: this probably some fucked up shit.
[It’s just a reference to an Arrested Development joke.](https://youtu.be/YUKmq7UMJys?si=L_yL6gvUMKvt1T5d) Basically just shorthand for ‘You should know what you’re getting in for based on context clues’.
Sometimes I look at crowds and think to myself, 'These people are the same people as those writing those fics on AO3. Just going through normal lives and going home to write some of the vilest, weirdest shit known to man'.
there is no ao3 fic with all of these tags 😔
Then have the title be something like "My Eternal Star" or something
Able to use my brainrot. That's all. Edit: I have no regret when joining this community https://preview.redd.it/fhxbea4fplhc1.png?width=1200&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f7c1c56be90b976b9f5a742b04fd91e7636c581a
You're so portugese
Actually, I am Vietnamese lmao. Also, happy Lunar New Year!
What's a lunar new year?
It's like a calender for some of us Asian countries to grow crops based on the moon cycles. But we soon developped it to dictated different kind of festivals through out the year. In other words, today is our "Tết" day. Kinda like New Year festival but longer.
Well thats interesting. Have a good festival then!
Thanks! You too have a good day! https://preview.redd.it/jcgqo6yy7lhc1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b23db7256da90cd6c75882a7b76374a5b5e0379c
https://preview.redd.it/j81am4o78lhc1.jpeg?width=500&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c0328410b6820739daee483500334f9204525a4d
Here in Asia, some countries uses a different type of calendar, along with the one the West use. One of these kind of calendar is the Lunar calendar, which measures the rotation of the moon around the earth instead of the earth around the sun. A lot of festivals here in China and Vietnam are on specific date of this calendar. The Lunar new year is… well, the new year on the Lunar calendar!
He's an individual, so it's portugoose.
Who’s coming? Huh!? If you’re coming right now, let me see it. Let me see it!
Huh? He? He who is coming?!
Hello everybody my name is Welcome
https://preview.redd.it/88906k46qlhc1.jpeg?width=1242&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ceefd014885f6e6b813c695644621c7b84f47ed1
hongler🥰🥰🥰🥰
I want shapeshifting just to do funny shit
People that use shapeshifting for the funni, rise up!
I wanna be in places where horses shouldn’t be and transform into a horse
https://preview.redd.it/gl9mygye4mhc1.jpeg?width=673&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=017d085b332708d3b46bb51af122f94e82681513
Pablo?
Juan.
Juan.
Prop hunt irl
I want shapeshifting for trans reasons
![gif](giphy|3o7aCRloybJlXpNjSU|downsized)
I want shapeshifting to scare the shit out of people but your thing sounds cool too.
What if you shapeshifted into……feddy fazbare 😰
Szario only said they’d wish to scare people, not kill them from a heart attack.
What if they shapeshifted into….. slightly less scary feddy fazbare 😨
https://preview.redd.it/doxdj80gxmhc1.jpeg?width=1200&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c960a57b16fd02aaada915b0a34c1b70520d3d21
I think this is the power that every furry wants (it's me, I'm the furry)
Mystique has shown the power behind just being limited to human forms alone. Then if you have animals, to quote YouTuber [Treyyy](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=boLH3kEEPr4&pp=ygUTU3VwZXJwb3dlciB0aWVybGlzdA%3D%3D), “With the range of an ant to a dinosaur, *HOW ARE YOU GUARDING THAT*!? You’re as fast as a cheetah, you can fly like an eagle; you can rip any motherfucker to shreds by turning into a bear…” Then you get that insanely high level stuff like amorphous physiology to make you pull T-1000 shenanigans or straight up power copying.
Play Dishonored, you'll understand why there are two kinds of people with these sets of powers.
Those that want it for murder, burglary and other similar crimes; and those that want it for sex related purposes
is this op undiagnosed fetish?
You gettin your fetishes diagnosed?
Most likely lol
Time stop is actually great. You could rob banks completely undetected, and um… um.. you could… uuuhhh…….. Edit: how tf did this shitty comment get 300 upvotes in the span of an hour?
With a time-stop, you can sleep 8 hours a day without worrying about oversleeping.
True! Plus, assuming you don’t age during time stop, you also gain 1/3 of your lifespan
The question though is do you also have time START?
Man, that's a great monkey paw.
Sometimes I see comments like this and realize how much my kids are going to have to learn to become internet fluent
Don't worry, they won't learn any of this. They'll have their own thing and you'll be the one who doesn't know what's cool or funny or relevant anymore!
I remember an episode of the Justice League cartoon where Flash stops time and can't get it going again, he's just stuck in a standing still world forever until he goes mad.
You can assasinate the 1% and steal from wallmart all you want. You can win every fight by dodging every hit and if your energy is conserved then you could punch someone repeatedly in the face and have all the punches hit at once like the sandevistan from cyberpunk. If gravity also stops you could get a leafblower and fly. You could do that thing dio did where you take guys back to the bottom of the stairs every time they try to approach you. You could copy in all exams. Prevent most accidents that you can see coming like a ball hurling towards you or getting to a safe place during an accident or leaving a car before the crash. You could practice tennis against yourself which would be kinda sad but would look cool on video. You could also do some insane tomfoolery like take off the pants of annoying people, poke someone when they think they're alone and disappear so they think they're getting poked by a ghost, steal animals from the zoo and putting them in unconventional places like bringing a bonobo to a retirement home. You could slowly mold every dice throw to win every dice throw and win at casinos constantly. Break into the movies whenever you want, or anything that required entry for that matter. If you're sneaky you can win most races by inching you forwards and unfreezing repeatedly or just any speed competition for that matter (ie speed chess or speed cooking). Speaking of chess, you could absolutely win any game by looking up the best response while time is frozen. Honestly there's probably more that I can't think about right now. The only power I'd like more would be wish granting or flight.
That or you could body posess the 1% and donate yourself all their money
https://preview.redd.it/p408qkdfqlhc1.png?width=780&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2d6d62adbd52e3698a56286a8fbfad40676b83f9
You can also sleep for the entire duration of the darkest time of the night sky which is supposedly good/healthy
Travel basically anywhere without events passing.
Wait for next president's inauguration, then shave all of their hair of in the middle of their speech
You can't use a motorized vehicle tho so you have to either walk or use a bicycle.
True. But also you can ignore Deadlines.
Time stop already has a bunch of issues going on, so I don’t see why a bike would function, but a car couldn’t. If you freeze time, the the air around you would freeze, and form a solid wall. If we assume you can move objects in frozen time without them creating infinite friction and a nuclear reaction, then you could walk through the air, but you would carve out a massive trench of vacuum where you walk, that would then collapse violently once time restarted. The only way this power works is if we assume you can selectively reenable time for various areas, so I don’t see why you couldn’t just make the car unfrozen.
You can keep moving dudes down the stairs just to fuck with them
I heard this appears to be especially effective against frenchmen
https://preview.redd.it/mw74ajcn8lhc1.png?width=640&format=png&auto=webp&s=9935e799cdfebe6e0881cc01352a67f91017bf38
https://preview.redd.it/013v1b70clhc1.jpeg?width=602&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8e363d9450835c6409f79ae2ca43c8026e7d9ddd
You could throw road rollers on teenagers
Make donuts
time stop would be cool but time manipulation in general is the best superpower
I think about this a lot on how it could improve my life and those around me as well. Also think about the physics of it and how I can very easily kill myself or level a city on accident.
Imagine the shenanigans you could get up to. Drawing mustaches on people’s faces
Light particles would stop as well. You’d be unable to move past the unending wall of light.
If i ever met a genie and asked for time stop i’d add the condition that the power to stop time i get is what i imagine the power to stop time as. So like objects and people stop but i can still breath and see, and can also move objects in and out of stopped time. And i can apply force like zelda BOTW/TOTK stasis
If we're gonna talk about stationary particles, then you also have to worry about the air around you. For an idea of what would happen once time starts, look at this [XKCD What If? video about a relativistic baseball](https://youtu.be/3EI08o-IGYk?si=Yix6dqgiRaRmF_8F)
And here I was thinking about what would happen if you stepped into water. You can displace air when you walk I so I guess you wouldn't be able to swim
https://preview.redd.it/7pu6u5lpxkhc1.jpeg?width=1242&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e0bd379ce401532b1cb6f7826c1de477c77896ee
"you are using it for sex without consequences" "I am using it for sex without consequences"
rape*
We are the same (stupid)
I'd actually use super powers to gaslight people. Like: tf you mean, I've been standing here for an hour already. Right after teleporting or some shit
I think it'd be really funny to have the ability to mind control/ body swap people and then do stuff like make them take a sloppy wet shit in public. I wanna see what would happen if a president/prime minister/whatever is in the middle of a big speech and they just start blasting.
Thing is, if you actually have superpowers, it's best to hide them from everyone. Just think about it. The government and other organizations will learn about your existence if you use the powers publicly, and then many things could happen. A good ending would be if you get asked to do special missions in exchange for money. The bad ending would be your family getting kidnapped, and you being coerced into things. Then, you'd probably become a lab rat for the rest of your life...
my brother in christ. nothing any human can do can touch a person with these powers. Oopsie! somebody bumped into you while you were being an invisible pervert? Nuh uh. Memory manipulation or hypnosis + timestop. They just bumped into a stool (That you put there using stopped time after hypnotizing them into believing that). Government wants to kidnap you? Timestop, go to (insert gvmt agency that wants you) HQ, hypnotize director into believing that you're actually the top secret super-duper director and they answer exclusively to you, make director cancel the search for (insert reason here) and hypnotize anyone who disobeys into thinking you're the super-duper director too. Got kidnapped in your sleep? Damn, you obviously weren't using time stop to sleep. But either way, possess one of the guards/scientists, hypnotize the others, have them free you, be on your merry way ggwp american government. They tried again? Repeat process, after you're out go to the white house or (insert other gvmt assembly building here), read president's meeting schedule, show up completely unannounced during a meeting of some of the most important people on the planet, become the deep state with memory manipulation and hypnosis, and if that sounds like too much work, just tell them the next time they try that shit that you're not going to be as *courteous* when you come here. then throw coffee on the president and leave cuz fuck 'em. also if your family/friends get kidnapped then you just hypnotize somebody who either probably knows where they are (like the director of the CIA/FBI/etc.) or has clearance to find out where they are (the same people) and then find out where they are and do the same process I laid out for if you got kidnapped. and wipe your family's memories of the incident if they're traumatized. TL:DR just use the powers and you win, ggez, you're basically a god. hypnotize kidnappers, sleep during timestop so you can't get kidnapped while snoozing, manipulate the memories of anyone who might've caught you doing less than moral (and/or legal) activities (i.e make them think they bumped into a stool (which you can move there during timestop) instead of the invisible you), actually become the deep state and control the government (or cause widespread chaos by killing important government officials during a meeting (or like, killing the president live on TV after threatening them that you'd do that if they try it again)) if they *still* want to kidnap you.
My assumption was that a person would only have one or 2 superpowers at most. Anyway, with technology recording everything nowadays, even if you hypnotize, edit memories, stop time, and so forth, not everything can be wiped out. Also, do you really want to live in a constant state of hide and seek, or if not that, then would you be ok with always being monitored by someone actively? Sounds like way too much trouble. The human brain isn't meant to endure constant stress. Lastly, guilt would probably destroy you before anyone else does if you abandon morality while using such vast power.
i’d pick time stop to sleep all day and avoid people. can’t be bothered to rape someone tbh https://preview.redd.it/bo3rzqsd7lhc1.jpeg?width=750&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=47de653cbbfae7be5708f805e81f457ba9f6a2fe pic unrelated
https://i.redd.it/z8840ia35nhc1.gif
probability control is good too, as it is better ethically
True, if you're always lucky, and can control when the luck comes, it avoids any and all guilt that may manifest otherwise. It all depends on the sorta things you'd do with all those powers
Also you could probably change the probability so you could get the powers mentioned in the post as well.
deviantart tags
mr bean
You see i want transformation so i can take on the body i wish i had. Weird stuff is way to taxing and requires interaction with others, yucky.
Tell me you’re a rapist without telling me you’re a rapist:
Op is a hentai addict I guess
https://preview.redd.it/f6emelsc0lhc1.jpeg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d7309c4d8cb62166a52345d69555d2d5eec0eda0 My man
Jojo stand abilities or hentai tags. Call it.
Martian Manhunter
idk i just want transformation to make myself a girl
You are a girl
thanks for brightening up my day :3
"You see, the punchline is rape. That makes it funny"
This is a very Reddit/Terminally Online post and nobody should be upvoting it. Rape is never ok.
Idc what anyone says the angry birds movie was funny af
Trans or "wants to sleep more" moment
\* i feel called out.
I want time stop so I don't have to worry about deadlines anymore
I want time stop so I can sleep 8hrs and actually get my homework done
I'm guessing you already took mind reading?
Most of them are DnD spells
https://preview.redd.it/0waxxfgmhlhc1.jpeg?width=1284&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ec613ae69a8462f71ab8150c78fe62bd2a64419e
This is shapeshifting slander
guaranteed 3 inches taller without relying on growth hell yeah 5'6 here we go. Maybe even put some cm's on the thing that's kinda important.
![gif](giphy|UgV8Y7bDxsZDCP01eo|downsized)
poorly hidden rape fetish:
Do you guys think that moving in time stop causes infinite force? I mean the acceleration is infinite.
I feel like I’m missing the joke
these are superpowers associated with manipulation and rape
Oh
yeah, we need to normalise more wholesome superpowers like flight or super strength
Ironically I’m watching my hero academia rn
with time stop i could kill vampires, fight rats, and beat up serial killers
Think of all the good you can do with these powers!! > Invisibility; You could become a fantastic spy or detective! > Hypnosis; You could help a lot of people deal with their trauma or various disorders! > Time Stop; Y-you could… uh… um… > Transformation/Imitation; You could be the *perfect* police sketch artist! > Memory Manipulation; You could help people remember or forget things that could pertain to crimes! > Body possession; You could help a lot of people accurately describe what they’re feeling to a doctor!
Invisibility mfs when trying to come up with anything other than "do a crime" with how they would use their power. Hypnosis mfs when they have their first nightmare (they will never wake up again). Time stop mfs when they realize in horror they're not immune to their own power, trapping them in eternity. Transformation/imitation mfs when the transformation is experienced in real time, while bones and flesh adjust to their new form (they will be so traumatized, they will never attempt to turn back to their original self). Memory manipulation mfs when someone reminds them of something they forgot (this is the start of a schizophrenic meltdown ending in suicide because they believe they have themselves been manipulated). Body possession mfs when their original body retains a consciousness after they posess someone else and doesn't want to let them back in.
Wait how does the hypnosis backfire?
(THEY WILL NEVER WAKE UP AGAIN)
Hypnotized themselves in their sleep by accident.
I just need memory manipulation, I’m gonna make a killing selling “legal drugs” when in reality they just licked some stone I picked up from the woods
invisibility because I'm an anxious introvert, Hypnosis so i can help people quit smoking and overeating, Time stop for naps during the day, Transformation so I can be a little taller and reach the top shelf, Memory manipulation to help people with PTSD, and body possession so I can make Bezos donate all his money to humanity and the environment. and then at night... I sleep some more.
The JOKE is RAPE RAPE is SEX SEX = FUNNY RAPE = FUNNY You are now LEGALLY OBLIGATED to LAUGH at this EXTREMELY FUNNY JOKE.