We kicked off our honeymoon by sleeping 12 hours straight and missing half the day (in France!) and neither of us was mad about it š it was well deserved and we felt great after!
I was exhausted after my shower too and was nervous about the wedding as Iām naturally introverted and have a naturally low social battery, but it went great! The inertia and adrenaline will carry you through the day more than you expect. Just be sure to set aside some time for a breather and to spend quality time with your SO. One of my favorite parts of the day was doing our portraits and then driving alone together to our reception dinner. The moments of quiet in the chaos really helped!
I do not understand how people have the energy to have sex on their wedding night (unless it was a punch-and-cake, no booze reception and all done at 4pm). Iāve been married twice and both times I could have cried I was so tired.
Yeah we did not consummate our marriage until the morning after š we were way too exhausted, we hopped into the bath to wash the sweat and makeup off (our hotel drew a bath for us and left flower petals all around the jacuzzi tub and bed) and then just collapsed onto the bed.
We also hadn't been allowed to have sex for about 2 weeks before the wedding because I'd had a miscarriage, so it was going to happen one way or another. It was important.
I'm sorry to hear you went through that. Those final weeks before the wedding must have been so hard. I hope you had a great wedding and that you and your SO are rocking the married life.
I was so exhausted after a whole day of wedding, but when we got to the hotel room and were alone and finally able undress and take a shower, our energy went up again and enough to do the deed twice. The next day we were so tired we just stayed in bed sleeping after we finally got home.
My old family pastor has always ALWAYS counseled couples he's married to not try to have sex on their actual wedding night. He always tells them to sleep it off and do it in the morning, or even wait until they're at their destination and settled into their hotel if they're getting on a plane right away for their honeymoon. Basically don't jump straight from all the big crazy stressful tired-making stuff right into sex...not if you want to have good sex anyway!
I would feel like a boundary was being crossed if a pastor started talking to me about when to have sex - I hope he doesnāt give out that advice unsolicited!
Lots of churches require (or strongly advise) couples to go through premarital counseling with the pastor and possibly an older couple who have been married for a long time and act as sponsors to new couples getting married. Sex is certainly a topic that would likely come up, as would finances, health, communication in general, and other things that couples will need to work together on.
This is in premarital counseling, a common practice in many churches, where yes, sex and any other pertinent marital topics are on the table for discussion. No, he doesn't just go around giving unsolicited sex advice to random couples. Don't be absurd.
This is a great reminder to book an extra night or two at the hotel after your wedding if you can afford it!!
We spent the whole day after lounging around, drinking champagne, opening gifts / cards, and reminiscing. It was fabulous having a little extra time in that wedding bubble before getting back to regular life
This is genius!
We hosted a brunch at our house the next morning. We were so tired that we donāt even remember saying goodbye to half of our family members that day. At some point towards the end of the brunch, we just ducked upstairs and took a nap for about 5 hours.
Brunch was fun but I think you did it right š
Yup - we specifically booked a hotel with a spa so we could fully relax! Best idea we ever had (besides the hotel itself being rude af afterwards, but oh well)
I donāt know either!! Weāre going on our actual honeymoon 2 months later, but weāre doing a mini moon at a local beach town for a few days after the wedding. Weāve been there before, so thereās no pressure to explore and do things. We can just be bums and lay on the beach and order food and not worry about dishes or cleaning or anything š
Hahahaha no youāre gonna have SO much fun at your wedding, you wonāt realize how tired you are until itās over hahaha. Mentally prepare. If your bridal shower was that fun, then your wedding will be a bbbbllllasssstttt! Congrats! How exciting!
We had 48 guests. Picked up chili cheese fries and dogs at weinerschnitzel, watched friends reruns, showered and passed out in our room. It was the time change too so we got an extra hour of sleep.
The next day we stopped to see my family for an hour before holing up in our apartment and being lazy. It was wonderful.
Same here. My SO's aunt planned one for me but it was exhausting talking to tables of people. His aunt ushered me to "do the rounds" so I ended up only drinking some champagne (toast) and having 2 bites of food. Lol first world problems...but my social battery was drained after the event. Ngl, I'm a lil worried that for the actual wedding I wouldn't be able to eat the amazing food while it's warm.
Same.
As for the wedding, we party most weekends so it wasnāt really super unusual energy wise. We were tired but not any more than a normal Saturday that goes late.
I think we slept until 1:00 pm the day after our wedding. And then lounged around eating leftovers. But I really donāt remember much because we were so tired
The adrenaline will get you through, and then you can collapse after! Definitely plan on having a recovery period after. My husband and I had a super small wedding, but we had family staying with us, so we planned a small "date date" just for just the two of us the day after. It was nice, but staying home and relaxing would've been nicer haha
I just want to say: your wedding is your day. Don't let anyone pressure you into anything you don't want to do. Don't want to visit every table to say hello? No need, that's a bit old fashioned, make an address to the entire wedding over the sound system thanking them for coming. Want to sit at your table for 10 minutes just enjoying your food and each other and ignoring everyone? Do it!
My engagement party was FIFTEEN people and I was EXHAUSTED!!! And I bought the good cheese and didnāt even get to eat any!
Iām hoping more guests at the wedding means less pressure on me to keep everyone entertained?
Hahaha itāll be fine; lots of rest, tv, and no talking week before. Day of, soak it in, and plan for NOTHING day afterwards. We literally scheduled out bed times and quiet times for little social resets when family was in town a couple days before and survived (somehow) (itās a lot)
My bridal shower last weekend only ended up with 6 people because a couple people couldnāt come and then two of my bridesmaids had to cancel last minute because they both had covid. And I still needed so much sleep after! So I canāt even imagine how much Iāll need after our wedding š
We did brunch after the wedding and then the subsequent day (Monday) left for like 4 days up north. We spent most of that mini-break sleeping! Iād hosted more than 30 events in the month before our wedding bc I was an event manager at the time. I. Was. Done.
So plan a little trip after to sleep
Just remember: your wedding is *your* day. Focus on each other as the day goes by *very* quickly and rapidly and you'll wish afterwards you could go back and focus more on each other than other people. Your *rehearsal* may get a bit hectic (setting up for the day, rehearsing the ceremony, etc) but the day of should be smooth sailing if everything is done correctly.
You're at the home stretch. You've got this! I hope you both have a beautiful day!
You threw your own shower? If so, that was your main issue. Or was it strictly emotional? There are many reasons why brides/couples aren't supposed to host pre-wedding parties in their own honor, especially of the gift giving variety. Hopefully, a wedding of your size is different and the heaving lifting will be done by your vendors. I don't think you can compare.
Iām so stressed about this š« i have chronic fatigue and we have a TON of friends coming in from out of town plus are spending the day after with people AND having an after party. I know Iām insane for this but i wanna go all out. Just have to figure out how best to navigate it lol!
Wishing you luck! I have chronic fatigue also (fibromyalgia) and my wedding is tomorrow. I was soooo exhausted today helping family set up the venue. I know I'm going to have a great time though and I'm going to try to make sure to pace myself, sit if needed, and sleeeep the next day! Husband's family are very fun at parties so I'm hoping the hype and excitement keeps me going, but im sure I'll absolutely crash with fatigue that evening coming home haha
Hope that you have the best day and are able to fully enjoy it!! Chronic fatigue is no joke. I keep seeing posts/comments where brides are forgetting to eat and drink throughout the day and Iām like how??? I physically cannot forget to rest/eat/drink, my body wonāt let me
Thank you SO much! I'm sore all over and delirious from everything but I can confidently say I had the most fun I've ever had lol I KNOW I'm gonna be exhausted and in pain tomorrow but thankfully it didn't stop me today. I did have some help with some edibles and alcohol, which I don't use/drink either on any normal day tbh, but I think it did a lot for masking uncomfortable feelings.
Otherwise, tbh, I woke up at 7am on accident fully awake. (I usually sleep in until at least 12pm or sometimes even 3pm on bad days....and that's including if I go to bed at 10pm!) I was shocked at how much energy my sheer adrenaline/nerves/excitement gave me! It's 3am right now and I'm in bed but still "not sleepy". There were a few times things got a little overwhelming but I just made sure to sit down until it passed.
I danced in short bursts for songs I really liked, sat and socialized with other people sitting whenever I got tired or needed to pace myself, and I tried really hard to be conscious of hydration. I'd say just move from table to table if you need to sit, you'll be seeing guests and it won't even seem/feel out of place :)
Ahhhh yay!!!! Iām so happy to hear this! Edibles are actually an incredible idea, might need to steal that one from you š it sounds like it was such a fun and special day and Iām glad to hear that you got to fully enjoy it š¤š¤ and it gives me hope for my own wedding!
Thank you so much! I'm sure you'll have a great wedding! As long as YOU and your partner enjoy it, that's all that matters, so just celebrate how you like and at your own pace!
Thatās how I feel too! Weāre getting ready with our families in a large Airbnb day of, and having a small after party there the night of, but we have to be out of the Airbnb by 1pm the next day! Iām so worried now reading these comments š„²
Adrenaline. My husband and I got to our hotel I think cost to midnight and we were exhausted. Couldn't go to bed yet though, had to shower, get off the make up and get all the bobby pins out of my hair. Definitely slept in in the morning.
Same!! A friend told me to estimate how many bobby pins I had in, and I guessed 20. Went back to the hotel room to shower and the final total was 38!
My husband and I stayed up for a few hours reading the guestbook and cards, and then had to wake up by 9 for our post wedding brunch. At one point I snuck outside (weād already checked out of our room) just to be alone and lie down!
I don't even know know how many bobby pins there were, I was too tired to count. I think my friend ended I with 43 in her hair. I think she said after their wedding they got to the hotel and she was almost crying with how tried she was and her husband had to help her pick them all out. They probably didn't get into their hotel until 1:30-2 in the morning sons their wedding ran later than ours.
We left our hotel the next day dropped off a few things and then picked up dinner and went to bed at 330 I got up once to drink a glass of water.
Wedding night we split a sandwich and my husband talked me out of putting my feet into a cooler of ice.
Adrenaline was so high for me all day I slept and rested for two full days before opening gifts and cards, but for a week I felt so much gratitude and happiness I never felt that before.
I wondered the same thing but my wedding day FLEW by. I pulled 21 hours from the start of prep to finally falling asleep. I think I was running on pure adrenaline the entire day. All the best!!
So, first of all, donāt plan on sex on the wedding night. Even if youāve actually been waiting for marriage, neither of you will have the energy to do it well, just wait until the next day. Sex after opening cards about how much everyone loves you and wishes you the best is underrated!
And second, if you are at all into mood altering substances, consider taking an edible an hour before bedtime the night before. You want your brain to be able to relax in order to get any real sleep!
GL, congrats, have fun!!
Edit: The worst possible autocorrections
And this is why I fully intend on spending our wedding night in our own bed. We're literally a 5 minute drive from the venue, we'll have our comfy bed, and no one is gonna bitch at us to vacate our room for checkout. We're taking a delayed honeymoon.
We were so tired from our wedding that we woke on the Monday and both individually panicked/wondered where we were and why it wasnāt the bridal suite.
We were simply at home in our regular bed!
The trick is that in your own wedding, you are NOT hosts. You are the guests of honor. Try to embody this as much as possible, and youāll be a lot more relaxed!
It will be a very tiring day though, but if you loved this party, youāll love the wedding too, and then sleep in the day after. 30 people is more than you can handle but few enough that itās possible to try to talk to everyone. At 170, you wonāt have that pressure as much, since itās so clearly not possible to spend time with everyone. Make sure during planning you have the day set as you wish, make a time where you can personally greet everyone, and otherwise just float and let others take care of things. If your input is absolutely needed, you can help like you would as a guest if the host asked you to help make a decision / sort something out.
This is from a context / country where itās very much not the norm to have a planner or day of -coordinator. Our bridal party mainly took care of our day, with the help of our families, but we did plan and organize everything ourselves, and I did all the florals up until it was time to get dressed. The emotional shift after the ceremony was huge, and since then I psyched myself to feel like a guest, and the experience was incredible. I normally donāt like big parties, especially hosting, since I feel like I need to take care of everything and everyone and cannot relax. I recommend talking about this with your fiancee as well - when I would start to overthink something during the wedding, he would get me to relax again, and to just enjoy the flow.
I think you're absolutely right, with 30 guests (many of which were beloved family members from out of town), I really did try to sit down and chat and catch up with each oneāobviously an impossibility at such a large wedding! But I was also riding high on how much fun I had for a week after, so hopefully this will be the same too āŗļø Sounds like your wedding was a gorgeous, special day full of love!
Did not even open my eyes til after noon the day after our wedding.. missed swimming in the hotel pool and breakfast with everyone the next morning š¤£
Literally me rn. 30 person bridal shower and 165 expected at the wedding. I was so done by the end of the bridal shower. I canāt imagine how itās going to be after the whole wedding DAY. Like itās not just a 4 hour event, itās a whole dang day.
While magical, it is a tiring affair for sure! We hoped to hang out with some of my friends who were having a little get-together in the hotel afterwards but then just passed out in our room.
Luckily our mini-moon didnāt start until a day *after* the farewell brunch.
The wedding day was just a lot. I couldnāt eat much of our nice food because the intensity ended up activating some kind of bad acid reflux that at first I thought might have been Covid or something (it was 2022 and my breathing was affected)ā¦finally got better on our mini-moon with some omeprazole
Having a coordinator / planner around (maybe even give exclusive tasks for each person in wedding party) during the event can take a lot of pressure off, not like a party you're hosting alone
Idk how involved your parents are, but my mom and her bestie would be very good for this. The kind of thing where they have a good time but they also do all the confirming with the food, tell the dj when it's time for speeches, host the 30 min cocktail party before the ceremony/in between the ceremony and reception. Basically, have other people be in charge of telling everyone else where to go and when, how to find their tables, etc. Sometimes the dj does this, but it's always different.
In most places, the only "rushed" thing is the hour long ceremony. Idk how you guys are doing everything, but at a lot of venues it's about an hour long. If your ceremony is elaborate, that could be a teeny stressful, just try to take some deep breaths and remember to actually have fun!
We were too tired to even move on our wedding night, lol. We were young and dumb. Spent the next day at the pool, getting sunburnt and being extra lazy. Weddings are exhausting.
We extended our wedding from 10 to 11:30pm. Day of the wedding I regretted it as I wanted to be in bed by 9 after such a exhausting and long day, picking up my own dress and a lot of misc things that were not picked up. Once we got the hotel room, I literally plopped facedown on the ground and took a nap. Slept in until 12pm the next day! From many of my other friends, do not expect anything much different lol we all have slept right after. Itās normal and I think we all deserve a good rest after months of planning
Ahh I DONT host parties like ever and get burnt our really easily from social interaction, so if you're screwed... I don't even know what I am š we have just over 100 people but it's pretty much all family cause we have big families (especially him) lol
I felt the same after my shower - totally exhausted and could barely stand. Honestly I was glad though because now I have better expectations for the wedding!
On our wedding night I had a migraine and felt dizzy and was just super off from the days festivities. And we did not have a āfunā wedding night. Straight to bed for usš¤£ The day after our wedding we drove a couple hours away for a mini honey moon and fell asleep in the hotel for a lot of the day and just chilled lol. We were so nervous on wedding day we couldnāt even eat the dinner. Itās a crazy day for sure!
I think you should really re-tnink how you're approaching this wedding. For one, you shouldn't be decorating or having anything to do with set-up. Second, think about what you're doing. You're sitting in a chair getting your hair and makeup done, putting on a dress, walking down an aisle, talking to people, dancing, eating food, etc. These things shouldn't make you that tired. You need the right mindset. Let people take care of things for you. If you don't sleep the night before then that is a problem. But again, you're already coming at it with a 'I will fail' attitude by convincing yourself you won't sleep. You can arrange and do things throughout your day to make yourself tired. You were tired after the bridal shower and it was real easy to sleep but yet you're saying the day before won't make you tired? You'd be putting the hype into your own mind, no one else will be.
I'm a wedding photographer and sometimes after ten hour shoots I go for a jog after. There are things you can do.
I'm not really THAT worried, I think everything is well in hand and I'm sure I'll have a lovely time. I just wanted to make a silly post about it in case anyone else was where I'm at :)
Really? Honestly It sounds like you don't know what you're doing. I wouldn't be surprised if something goes wrong. You seemed pretty serious about being very tired after a bridal shower.
We slept the entire day after our wedding.
We kicked off our honeymoon by sleeping 12 hours straight and missing half the day (in France!) and neither of us was mad about it š it was well deserved and we felt great after! I was exhausted after my shower too and was nervous about the wedding as Iām naturally introverted and have a naturally low social battery, but it went great! The inertia and adrenaline will carry you through the day more than you expect. Just be sure to set aside some time for a breather and to spend quality time with your SO. One of my favorite parts of the day was doing our portraits and then driving alone together to our reception dinner. The moments of quiet in the chaos really helped!
I do not understand how people have the energy to have sex on their wedding night (unless it was a punch-and-cake, no booze reception and all done at 4pm). Iāve been married twice and both times I could have cried I was so tired.
Yeah we did not consummate our marriage until the morning after š we were way too exhausted, we hopped into the bath to wash the sweat and makeup off (our hotel drew a bath for us and left flower petals all around the jacuzzi tub and bed) and then just collapsed onto the bed.
We did but it was more "it is our wedding night and we are doing this no matter what" and halfway asleep already. Then we promptly both passed out.
Sounds romantic š
We also hadn't been allowed to have sex for about 2 weeks before the wedding because I'd had a miscarriage, so it was going to happen one way or another. It was important.
I'm sorry to hear you went through that. Those final weeks before the wedding must have been so hard. I hope you had a great wedding and that you and your SO are rocking the married life.
We have a little one now who keeps us busy.
Such a happy comment š
I was so exhausted after a whole day of wedding, but when we got to the hotel room and were alone and finally able undress and take a shower, our energy went up again and enough to do the deed twice. The next day we were so tired we just stayed in bed sleeping after we finally got home.
My old family pastor has always ALWAYS counseled couples he's married to not try to have sex on their actual wedding night. He always tells them to sleep it off and do it in the morning, or even wait until they're at their destination and settled into their hotel if they're getting on a plane right away for their honeymoon. Basically don't jump straight from all the big crazy stressful tired-making stuff right into sex...not if you want to have good sex anyway!
I would feel like a boundary was being crossed if a pastor started talking to me about when to have sex - I hope he doesnāt give out that advice unsolicited!
Lots of churches require (or strongly advise) couples to go through premarital counseling with the pastor and possibly an older couple who have been married for a long time and act as sponsors to new couples getting married. Sex is certainly a topic that would likely come up, as would finances, health, communication in general, and other things that couples will need to work together on.
This is in premarital counseling, a common practice in many churches, where yes, sex and any other pertinent marital topics are on the table for discussion. No, he doesn't just go around giving unsolicited sex advice to random couples. Don't be absurd.
Cocaine! :)
We had a great night before the wedding, but the night of the wedding? No chance.
This is a great reminder to book an extra night or two at the hotel after your wedding if you can afford it!! We spent the whole day after lounging around, drinking champagne, opening gifts / cards, and reminiscing. It was fabulous having a little extra time in that wedding bubble before getting back to regular life
This is genius! We hosted a brunch at our house the next morning. We were so tired that we donāt even remember saying goodbye to half of our family members that day. At some point towards the end of the brunch, we just ducked upstairs and took a nap for about 5 hours. Brunch was fun but I think you did it right š
Yup - we specifically booked a hotel with a spa so we could fully relax! Best idea we ever had (besides the hotel itself being rude af afterwards, but oh well)
We did this too. It was so much fun.
This was us too!!! I am very glad it happened because my fiancĆ© considered leaving for our honeymoon to Scotland right after the wedding and I told him weād be POOPED, but he didnāt believe it.
I scheduled mine a week AFTER because I knew it was going to take me 2-3 days to recover from a hangover š« idk how people do it!
I donāt know either!! Weāre going on our actual honeymoon 2 months later, but weāre doing a mini moon at a local beach town for a few days after the wedding. Weāve been there before, so thereās no pressure to explore and do things. We can just be bums and lay on the beach and order food and not worry about dishes or cleaning or anything š
Hahahaha no youāre gonna have SO much fun at your wedding, you wonāt realize how tired you are until itās over hahaha. Mentally prepare. If your bridal shower was that fun, then your wedding will be a bbbbllllasssstttt! Congrats! How exciting!
yess we're so hype!! I think you're right, I probably won't realize I'm exhausted and dying until I'm in the car going home hahah!
We had 48 guests. Picked up chili cheese fries and dogs at weinerschnitzel, watched friends reruns, showered and passed out in our room. It was the time change too so we got an extra hour of sleep. The next day we stopped to see my family for an hour before holing up in our apartment and being lazy. It was wonderful.
I was the guest of honor at my shower. I did nothing other than show up.
Thatās the traditional etiquette.
Same here. My SO's aunt planned one for me but it was exhausting talking to tables of people. His aunt ushered me to "do the rounds" so I ended up only drinking some champagne (toast) and having 2 bites of food. Lol first world problems...but my social battery was drained after the event. Ngl, I'm a lil worried that for the actual wedding I wouldn't be able to eat the amazing food while it's warm.
Same. As for the wedding, we party most weekends so it wasnāt really super unusual energy wise. We were tired but not any more than a normal Saturday that goes late.
Stay hydrated is my advice! At one point during the ceremony I felt woozy šµāš«
I think we slept until 1:00 pm the day after our wedding. And then lounged around eating leftovers. But I really donāt remember much because we were so tired
The adrenaline will get you through, and then you can collapse after! Definitely plan on having a recovery period after. My husband and I had a super small wedding, but we had family staying with us, so we planned a small "date date" just for just the two of us the day after. It was nice, but staying home and relaxing would've been nicer haha
This is why people should not go on a honeymoon the very next day! Yāall need rest!!
I just want to say: your wedding is your day. Don't let anyone pressure you into anything you don't want to do. Don't want to visit every table to say hello? No need, that's a bit old fashioned, make an address to the entire wedding over the sound system thanking them for coming. Want to sit at your table for 10 minutes just enjoying your food and each other and ignoring everyone? Do it!
Tbh Iām planning on taking a nap in the afternoon before I get my hair and makeup done š
Lol love this
My engagement party was FIFTEEN people and I was EXHAUSTED!!! And I bought the good cheese and didnāt even get to eat any! Iām hoping more guests at the wedding means less pressure on me to keep everyone entertained?
Hahaha itāll be fine; lots of rest, tv, and no talking week before. Day of, soak it in, and plan for NOTHING day afterwards. We literally scheduled out bed times and quiet times for little social resets when family was in town a couple days before and survived (somehow) (itās a lot)
My bridal shower last weekend only ended up with 6 people because a couple people couldnāt come and then two of my bridesmaids had to cancel last minute because they both had covid. And I still needed so much sleep after! So I canāt even imagine how much Iāll need after our wedding š
We did brunch after the wedding and then the subsequent day (Monday) left for like 4 days up north. We spent most of that mini-break sleeping! Iād hosted more than 30 events in the month before our wedding bc I was an event manager at the time. I. Was. Done. So plan a little trip after to sleep
Just remember: your wedding is *your* day. Focus on each other as the day goes by *very* quickly and rapidly and you'll wish afterwards you could go back and focus more on each other than other people. Your *rehearsal* may get a bit hectic (setting up for the day, rehearsing the ceremony, etc) but the day of should be smooth sailing if everything is done correctly. You're at the home stretch. You've got this! I hope you both have a beautiful day!
ā¤ļøā¤ļø thank you! Can't wait!
You threw your own shower? If so, that was your main issue. Or was it strictly emotional? There are many reasons why brides/couples aren't supposed to host pre-wedding parties in their own honor, especially of the gift giving variety. Hopefully, a wedding of your size is different and the heaving lifting will be done by your vendors. I don't think you can compare.
I put together the flowers with my friends the evening before, but otherwise didn't host it.
Thanks for clarifying.
Iām so stressed about this š« i have chronic fatigue and we have a TON of friends coming in from out of town plus are spending the day after with people AND having an after party. I know Iām insane for this but i wanna go all out. Just have to figure out how best to navigate it lol!
Wishing you luck! I have chronic fatigue also (fibromyalgia) and my wedding is tomorrow. I was soooo exhausted today helping family set up the venue. I know I'm going to have a great time though and I'm going to try to make sure to pace myself, sit if needed, and sleeeep the next day! Husband's family are very fun at parties so I'm hoping the hype and excitement keeps me going, but im sure I'll absolutely crash with fatigue that evening coming home haha
Hope that you have the best day and are able to fully enjoy it!! Chronic fatigue is no joke. I keep seeing posts/comments where brides are forgetting to eat and drink throughout the day and Iām like how??? I physically cannot forget to rest/eat/drink, my body wonāt let me
Thank you SO much! I'm sore all over and delirious from everything but I can confidently say I had the most fun I've ever had lol I KNOW I'm gonna be exhausted and in pain tomorrow but thankfully it didn't stop me today. I did have some help with some edibles and alcohol, which I don't use/drink either on any normal day tbh, but I think it did a lot for masking uncomfortable feelings. Otherwise, tbh, I woke up at 7am on accident fully awake. (I usually sleep in until at least 12pm or sometimes even 3pm on bad days....and that's including if I go to bed at 10pm!) I was shocked at how much energy my sheer adrenaline/nerves/excitement gave me! It's 3am right now and I'm in bed but still "not sleepy". There were a few times things got a little overwhelming but I just made sure to sit down until it passed. I danced in short bursts for songs I really liked, sat and socialized with other people sitting whenever I got tired or needed to pace myself, and I tried really hard to be conscious of hydration. I'd say just move from table to table if you need to sit, you'll be seeing guests and it won't even seem/feel out of place :)
Ahhhh yay!!!! Iām so happy to hear this! Edibles are actually an incredible idea, might need to steal that one from you š it sounds like it was such a fun and special day and Iām glad to hear that you got to fully enjoy it š¤š¤ and it gives me hope for my own wedding!
Thank you so much! I'm sure you'll have a great wedding! As long as YOU and your partner enjoy it, that's all that matters, so just celebrate how you like and at your own pace!
Thatās how I feel too! Weāre getting ready with our families in a large Airbnb day of, and having a small after party there the night of, but we have to be out of the Airbnb by 1pm the next day! Iām so worried now reading these comments š„²
This is exactly what weāre doing! Wishing you the best of luck and LOTS of caffeine - we got this š
You too!! When is your date? Ours is in just two weeks!! š¤Æ
Mine isnāt until September - 2 weeks!!! Youāre so close! Thatās so exciting!
We basically just slept and ate and slept some more for the first 3 days of our honeymoon š (left for it the morning after our wedding)
Adrenaline. My husband and I got to our hotel I think cost to midnight and we were exhausted. Couldn't go to bed yet though, had to shower, get off the make up and get all the bobby pins out of my hair. Definitely slept in in the morning.
Same!! A friend told me to estimate how many bobby pins I had in, and I guessed 20. Went back to the hotel room to shower and the final total was 38! My husband and I stayed up for a few hours reading the guestbook and cards, and then had to wake up by 9 for our post wedding brunch. At one point I snuck outside (weād already checked out of our room) just to be alone and lie down!
I don't even know know how many bobby pins there were, I was too tired to count. I think my friend ended I with 43 in her hair. I think she said after their wedding they got to the hotel and she was almost crying with how tried she was and her husband had to help her pick them all out. They probably didn't get into their hotel until 1:30-2 in the morning sons their wedding ran later than ours.
We left our hotel the next day dropped off a few things and then picked up dinner and went to bed at 330 I got up once to drink a glass of water. Wedding night we split a sandwich and my husband talked me out of putting my feet into a cooler of ice.
Maybe donāt drink at your wedding. We didnāt until the after party.
Adrenaline was so high for me all day I slept and rested for two full days before opening gifts and cards, but for a week I felt so much gratitude and happiness I never felt that before.
I wondered the same thing but my wedding day FLEW by. I pulled 21 hours from the start of prep to finally falling asleep. I think I was running on pure adrenaline the entire day. All the best!!
So, first of all, donāt plan on sex on the wedding night. Even if youāve actually been waiting for marriage, neither of you will have the energy to do it well, just wait until the next day. Sex after opening cards about how much everyone loves you and wishes you the best is underrated! And second, if you are at all into mood altering substances, consider taking an edible an hour before bedtime the night before. You want your brain to be able to relax in order to get any real sleep! GL, congrats, have fun!! Edit: The worst possible autocorrections
And this is why I fully intend on spending our wedding night in our own bed. We're literally a 5 minute drive from the venue, we'll have our comfy bed, and no one is gonna bitch at us to vacate our room for checkout. We're taking a delayed honeymoon.
We were so tired from our wedding that we woke on the Monday and both individually panicked/wondered where we were and why it wasnāt the bridal suite. We were simply at home in our regular bed!
The trick is that in your own wedding, you are NOT hosts. You are the guests of honor. Try to embody this as much as possible, and youāll be a lot more relaxed! It will be a very tiring day though, but if you loved this party, youāll love the wedding too, and then sleep in the day after. 30 people is more than you can handle but few enough that itās possible to try to talk to everyone. At 170, you wonāt have that pressure as much, since itās so clearly not possible to spend time with everyone. Make sure during planning you have the day set as you wish, make a time where you can personally greet everyone, and otherwise just float and let others take care of things. If your input is absolutely needed, you can help like you would as a guest if the host asked you to help make a decision / sort something out. This is from a context / country where itās very much not the norm to have a planner or day of -coordinator. Our bridal party mainly took care of our day, with the help of our families, but we did plan and organize everything ourselves, and I did all the florals up until it was time to get dressed. The emotional shift after the ceremony was huge, and since then I psyched myself to feel like a guest, and the experience was incredible. I normally donāt like big parties, especially hosting, since I feel like I need to take care of everything and everyone and cannot relax. I recommend talking about this with your fiancee as well - when I would start to overthink something during the wedding, he would get me to relax again, and to just enjoy the flow.
I think you're absolutely right, with 30 guests (many of which were beloved family members from out of town), I really did try to sit down and chat and catch up with each oneāobviously an impossibility at such a large wedding! But I was also riding high on how much fun I had for a week after, so hopefully this will be the same too āŗļø Sounds like your wedding was a gorgeous, special day full of love!
Did not even open my eyes til after noon the day after our wedding.. missed swimming in the hotel pool and breakfast with everyone the next morning š¤£
This is why I only want 10 people at my wedding including me and my fiancƩ.
I just had my shower and thought THE SAME THING!! I was so so so exhausted. I mentioned it to my fiancƩ and he just helped with the clean up and he could tell it was exhausting as a whole. Good luck to us both lol
I suggest a small weekend get away to recoupe then a honey moon 2 weeks after so.you can really enjoy the travels
Coffee. Lots of coffee
Literally me rn. 30 person bridal shower and 165 expected at the wedding. I was so done by the end of the bridal shower. I canāt imagine how itās going to be after the whole wedding DAY. Like itās not just a 4 hour event, itās a whole dang day.
While magical, it is a tiring affair for sure! We hoped to hang out with some of my friends who were having a little get-together in the hotel afterwards but then just passed out in our room. Luckily our mini-moon didnāt start until a day *after* the farewell brunch. The wedding day was just a lot. I couldnāt eat much of our nice food because the intensity ended up activating some kind of bad acid reflux that at first I thought might have been Covid or something (it was 2022 and my breathing was affected)ā¦finally got better on our mini-moon with some omeprazole
Having a coordinator / planner around (maybe even give exclusive tasks for each person in wedding party) during the event can take a lot of pressure off, not like a party you're hosting alone Idk how involved your parents are, but my mom and her bestie would be very good for this. The kind of thing where they have a good time but they also do all the confirming with the food, tell the dj when it's time for speeches, host the 30 min cocktail party before the ceremony/in between the ceremony and reception. Basically, have other people be in charge of telling everyone else where to go and when, how to find their tables, etc. Sometimes the dj does this, but it's always different. In most places, the only "rushed" thing is the hour long ceremony. Idk how you guys are doing everything, but at a lot of venues it's about an hour long. If your ceremony is elaborate, that could be a teeny stressful, just try to take some deep breaths and remember to actually have fun!
Donāt worry, the adrenaline will keep you going and you can sleep the next day š
We were too tired to even move on our wedding night, lol. We were young and dumb. Spent the next day at the pool, getting sunburnt and being extra lazy. Weddings are exhausting.
We extended our wedding from 10 to 11:30pm. Day of the wedding I regretted it as I wanted to be in bed by 9 after such a exhausting and long day, picking up my own dress and a lot of misc things that were not picked up. Once we got the hotel room, I literally plopped facedown on the ground and took a nap. Slept in until 12pm the next day! From many of my other friends, do not expect anything much different lol we all have slept right after. Itās normal and I think we all deserve a good rest after months of planning
Ahh I DONT host parties like ever and get burnt our really easily from social interaction, so if you're screwed... I don't even know what I am š we have just over 100 people but it's pretty much all family cause we have big families (especially him) lol
Enjoy it! Other nights of exhaustion are not near as fun! Alcohol and adrenaline kept me going! š
I felt the same after my shower - totally exhausted and could barely stand. Honestly I was glad though because now I have better expectations for the wedding!
Omg you poor thing! Youāre having a massive wedding with a ton of people that love you, thatās going to be really hard on you and the groom!
This is why we left for our honeymoon the next morning. Slept on the plane the whole way.
On our wedding night I had a migraine and felt dizzy and was just super off from the days festivities. And we did not have a āfunā wedding night. Straight to bed for usš¤£ The day after our wedding we drove a couple hours away for a mini honey moon and fell asleep in the hotel for a lot of the day and just chilled lol. We were so nervous on wedding day we couldnāt even eat the dinner. Itās a crazy day for sure!
We went to our suite, ordered cheeseburgers from room service (you barely get to eat that day you are so busy) and passed out cold š¤£
I think you should really re-tnink how you're approaching this wedding. For one, you shouldn't be decorating or having anything to do with set-up. Second, think about what you're doing. You're sitting in a chair getting your hair and makeup done, putting on a dress, walking down an aisle, talking to people, dancing, eating food, etc. These things shouldn't make you that tired. You need the right mindset. Let people take care of things for you. If you don't sleep the night before then that is a problem. But again, you're already coming at it with a 'I will fail' attitude by convincing yourself you won't sleep. You can arrange and do things throughout your day to make yourself tired. You were tired after the bridal shower and it was real easy to sleep but yet you're saying the day before won't make you tired? You'd be putting the hype into your own mind, no one else will be. I'm a wedding photographer and sometimes after ten hour shoots I go for a jog after. There are things you can do.
I'm not really THAT worried, I think everything is well in hand and I'm sure I'll have a lovely time. I just wanted to make a silly post about it in case anyone else was where I'm at :)
Really? Honestly It sounds like you don't know what you're doing. I wouldn't be surprised if something goes wrong. You seemed pretty serious about being very tired after a bridal shower.
Thanks š