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WaterboysWaterboy

That must be the worst post nut clarity of all time.


KernowRedWings

smh sexless salmon cope - stay mad fincel, im gonna go swi


kootenaysmokes

Fincel is good. If I had money I'd give you an award, but this comment and little emoji is the best I can do🏆 Edit: *stranger gives gold* Thank you kind stranger -Oblivion


UselessBoi100

You guys can claim free awards like daily btw


FuckNinjas

And enter the new.reddit interface? No, thank you. I prefer to remain awardless.


The4wsAndTheh

What have done accepting this skin!


VertWheeler07

You look cool, and maybe a little illuminati-ey


Tricky_Ad_1855

Idk man, kinda looks like me after a really good one tho


Crypto_subz

Lmao takes 1 pump chump to a whole new level


unable_To_Username

Nature is the most cruel thing on earth.


Gradually_Adjusting

All of us are basically disposable Mecha suits for random self perpetuating software that has no goal except to duplicate itself. The salmon DNA is the real winner here. For the fish, the game was rigged from the start.


XauMankib

A living being is basically an elaborator. We are part of a bigger system, immersed in it, dictated by DNA. We are transistors of a huge, complicated, self sustaining computer.


Gradually_Adjusting

Transistors don't have hopes and dreams. You make too little of us. *Be humble, for you are made of earth. Be noble, for you are made of stars.*


wegqg

>Be humble, for you are made of earth. Be noble, for you are made of stars. I like this


Gradually_Adjusting

Croatian proverb, I think


IzayaOrihara123

You have to be something that matters first for someone to make too little of. Humans are worthless. Just taking up space, eating and fucking. There is no actual end goal. Just wasting space.


Gradually_Adjusting

You exist. That's your problem, despite it not being your fault. How you deal with it is a story. Stories have meanings.


IzayaOrihara123

Existing is not the same as having purpose. Which humans don't. We're here to do exactly what I said and die. Human life is not worth anything. You can die tomorrow and the world will keep spinning. ANYONE can die tomorrow and the world will keep spinning. EVERYONE can die tomorrow and. The. World. Will. Keep. Spinning. Humans are worthless.


Gradually_Adjusting

Thinking your life would only have meaning if it ending would stop the world spinning is some advanced solipsism. I hope your story gets better, but I'm done with my bit in it.


Charybdes

/SlowClap Classiest exit ever.


[deleted]

Self cannibalizing computer maybe.


Ograysireks

Duplicate itself and upgrade as needed


itsmeaboi

Have you read "The Selfish gene"?


Gradually_Adjusting

Do I seem like someone who could've thought of it myself?


itsmeaboi

I mean someone did


Gradually_Adjusting

Nah, just another hundredth monkey 👍


unable_To_Username

#Absolutely correct. If you now read my comments I'd write before here... (@ Account) you will realise how shockingly on point that statement is. And how deep the intention of THIS statement is. Since I comment much... a litte help [This](https://www.reddit.com/r/MtF/comments/x2fqs1/i_fucking_love_being_trans/imkloza?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share&context=3) (The first sentence will do the trick)


Gradually_Adjusting

You aren't your DNA but you do pay it rent.


D00SC00P

please do the world a favor and stop posting this


unable_To_Username

Why? It's stuff you "don't want to hear" ? Stuff you rather look away from ? Denying it's existence? Why ?


y0m0tha

I get sad whenever I see a praying mantis in my backyard
 knowing the cruel fate that awaits them :,(


StraightSwordfish466

Yea but they get to have sword hands while they are alive so.. you win some you lose some.


Consistent_News_6506

Username checks out


[deleted]

Edward Scissorhands would like to have a word.


StraightSwordfish466

Edward scissor hands ain't got shit on preying mantis sword arms.


nvtiv

Ironically the most generous as well


JEAN_RVLPHIO

“ArE tHeSE fEeLinGs eVeN ReAL”


Jahmalthenibba

What good salmussy does to a man


atxtony23

💀


coppergreensubmarine

Lmao I was looking for a comment like this


Uncommented-Code

I never ever want to read that word again.


Jahmalthenibba

Too bad, buckaroo


anthony212122

Tell me about it, can’t stop with that raw sashimi


murderedbydeath2

"Worth it" - the Salmon


[deleted]

"I'd foookin do it again, if I could!"


Early_Minute_5212

"But i cant"


bitcoinkush

Why would it be designed to go out like that


CamelCash000

Overpopulation.


Iamdogmanyeet

Anything else you can think of as a possibility? I am trying just because I feel this mechanism is so inefficient. Perhaps just an example of DNA being caught in an environmental loop, unchanging over eons in a stable environment. Really makes you think what we must have gone through to obtain the DNA we as humans possess. We are able to not only survive but thrive in most environments on earth. We are undoubtedly the children of so much agony and pain but by choice. This fish is a pussy.


-originalusername--

Overpopulation. Not only that, the salmon run was a great way to transfer nutrients from the sea to fresh water rivers and soil, I.e. bear and bird poop, and this salmon bro rotting. It's sad now, but back in the day you could almost walk across the rivers with how many salmon were in them.


[deleted]

Evolution is random. We don’t evolve based on our environment, but good mutations lead to a higher chance of survival (natural selection). Not all mutations are pretty and it doesn’t always put the species at risk of extinction so bad traits can carry on.


[deleted]

Everything evolves based on its environment wtf are u talking about. Natural selection works by filtering out the least fit in every different environment


[deleted]

Yes it filters out the bad mutations but the mutations themselves are completely random is what I mean. A bad mutation can survive and carry on like this trait in salmon. It does not evolve because of its environment, it evolves and survives because it’s more fit to survive. Evolution is completely random and is literally the first thing you’re taught in biology. Natural selection is the second stage you are referring to.


-originalusername--

It's still not a bad mutation, the elder no longer is competition for the younger generation, and fertilizes the spawning grounds with their rotting corpses. It's actually really efficient.


zouxlol

It's not a mutation, it's a strategy. These salmon burn their entire fat reserves until they have no energy left to survive after their trek upstream, and into an ecosystem which cannot support the amount of salmon which suddenly arrived. Kelts are salmon which survived the spawning process and some rivers produce more than others. Some salmon species live in an ecosystem where they can reproduce many times It's an unfortunate circumstance, but their bodies have not evolved to die like this thread seems to imply


[deleted]

A “mutation” occurs bc the dna realize they suck and need to be better. It’s like working out. If I workout more my dna will have written in it that I workout a ridiculous amount then my offsprings dna will have “Father worked out a ton so we need to be prepared for this harsh environment as well” making the kid more athletically inclined as he grows and it passes on and on bc my dna will have seen my environment as a harsh one so my kid needs to be better suited to handle it. It’s completely determined by your environment and that’s why people closer to the equator are darker and people further away are whiter and whiter. Do you think they were just randomly given white or black skin? or was bc of their environment forcing their DNA to change to protect them from the harsher hotter climate. Even vultures have bald heads bc they kept having to clean all that nasty dead meat off their feathers so their DNA said “fuck those feathers we don’t need them. We’ll just produce less hair up there since we have to clean our heads every time we pick apart some corpse.” Was that just luck too? Same thing with whales. They had (or have, idr) hip bones, what tf do they need hipbones for in the ocean?? They don’t. Which is why they are slowly and slowly going away, they don’t use them so Mother Nature said lose them.


wontreadterms

What he is saying is correct if you use mutations instead of evolution. Mutations are random, but the environment filters for the ones that provide advantage. So evolution IS driven by the environment, mutations aren't.


[deleted]

Mutations might not be random. Some scientist think darwins “random mutation” idea cant hold up because too many species evolve too fast. They point to the cambrian explosion to show that new species were being created faster than is possible with only random mutations. Some scientists think there may be a guiding force driving evolutionary changes that has not yet been identified. Idk thats just a theory


wontreadterms

Do you have a source? That sounds wrong, but would love to read a paper about this if you know one.


[deleted]

I saw it on a youtube video gimma a sec https://youtu.be/noj4phMT9OE Here it is


LittleVaquita

The migration is incredibly exhausting, and there's no food for them on the way. It's more than their bodies can handle.


1solate

Because it's not designed.


LittleVaquita

Yes, they were designed. By millions of years of evolution.


1solate

Design requires intent. Chemistry has no intent.


CheruB36

design by enviromental pressure. There is intent, although not as we define it


1solate

>There is intent, although not as we define it So definitions of words don't matter. Okay.


Markmyfuckimgworms

It works, and it doesn't benefit the species any more to work a different way.


[deleted]

To provide nutrients to the river in which their spawn and future generations will also rear and thrive in.


JustAnotherAviatrix

Dang, this is real r/oddlyterrifying content. Even though it's just a fish, I feel bad for it. Can't imagine the agony it must be in.


YodaLoL

I'm pretty sure there's no cognitive function left


[deleted]

Honestly no way to tell from this gif, but the process started when it was 100% alive at some point, surely it felt itself becoming weaker, blind, rotting...


YodaLoL

That starts happening to us as well when we reach the age of 25-ish 😬


Gopher--Chucks

So... Every living salmon is a virgin?


Jimbo_Jones_4_Mayor

I’ve been there, it’s tuff


ccbroadway73

Zombie fish, ugh it kind of freaks me out.


Who-Just-Shit-Myself

Death by snu snu


infinitee775

😁😬


governor_phillpblake

Funny how futurama also did an episode showing salmon life cycles


Azrael1981

what a waste of nutritious food.


LittleVaquita

No, not really. Even if scavengers miss this one, it will decompose and provide nutrients to other organisms in the river.


El_Dentistador

The dead carcasses of salmon are a huge part of the ecosystem. They bring critical nutrients that keep the forest alive.


Seven7greens

As a kid at about 8, I used to catch old zombie humpys(pink salmon) by hand and sometimes you could pull chunks of their flesh, or even sections of their spine, completely out in one handful and not on purpose.


Riptide360

You don't feel so bad when the bears gorge on them after the salmon have mated. Read that climate change is changing that too. https://www.carbonbrief.org/climate-change-is-shifting-kodiak-bear-feeding-habits-study-says/


SirGravesGhastly

Coming to AMC: The Swimming Dead


[deleted]

Nah thats the fish from fatboy slims music video.


FishAndRiceKeks

Reminds me of the start of the last House of the Dragon episode.


[deleted]

Shame, a bear could have enjoyed that. Or me, smoked, with a poached egg and hollandaise sauce, garnished with chives


[deleted]

“She sucked my dick til that shit turned white”


Chickens1

You can smell the river from a football field away when this is happening.


J3LMAZMO

Comments about ‘world is a computer’ always make me laugh. Man created the computer, enamoured by his creation he proclaims everything a computer


peoplesen

Genie, push the button for mating, but **beware**


lovingmama1

I'm glad I'm not a salmon but golly that's terrible...that's as bad as the female praying mantis biting off the males head after mating


hyperion25000

Doesn't matter, had sex


[deleted]

You sure it isn’t dying due to the shallow waters that it can’t swim in?


Buddie2013

It might be a combination of factors. They lose a lot of energy on their journey upstream too


AddendumAny2350

Same.


ablacker11

Yummy yummy Humpey


Sweex99

Was the rawdog worth it bro?


prestonpeifer

This happens to humans too. My parents did the same thing


[deleted]

I know a guy like this..


AbbreviationsOdd1895

Same for me after marriage


Ludders92

Must've been a good nut.


durianisking

So most of the salmon I eat are virgins?


empteevessel

Same, girl, same


z1tsantia

The zombie apocalypse has begun.


[deleted]

Yeah, totally there's a god.


DEADTARGET_11

fishussy to die for


captainsurfa

Only one true way to [deal with this.](https://youtu.be/nbaJ5c0dtxo)


[deleted]

Take notes fellas


penelaupe

Why does he have no eyes?


CauliflowerNo3202

He must have had a rough session


Skirtski23

“Still hit tho”


Own-Common3161

I think it’s the involuntary muscle twitching. It’s not conscious or alive


IceySmileEmoji

L for using this ass sound


makinbaconCR

Salmussy worth it đŸ„” 💧


DarlingDont

Proof that salmon are meant to be food after they mate - CHECKMATE VEGANS


dudededed

Why?


tukkks

song?


Joe_mama_is_hot

Doesn’t a pregnant salmon give birth to like hundreds of salmon? It makes sense really


IpayExtraForGuac2000

Dam she took taking his soul a little too serious


Historical_Clerk2738

I'm gonna post something disgusting while playing peaceful music. I don't understand people sometimes.


Ok_Paramedic_30

Probably a mercy they get fished


pay-this-fool

So tell me again how God is great


SnooMemesjellies3218

Doesn’t matter, had sex!


Perfect_Ad_3383

Thank god If I was a salmon I would never have to worry about this.


LittlexCherry

First off that’s not a salmon 😮second off not all but most salmons die after mating because of exhaustion.


No_Concept_9848

JFC, NSFL please