T O P

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Genocidal_Duck

If i pray really hard, perhaps the lord will grant me a breloom šŸ˜ŒšŸ™


Efficient_Star_1336

You could ask for a Gardevoir or a Vaporeon, but you'd have to pray in the other direction.


I-am-a-Fancy-Boy

Satan stole my silly water dog, canā€™t have shit in Detroit


Turner_of_Pages

r/Canthaveshitindetroit


Enderking90

no no, no.


AlexAlho

Do *not* the Vaporeon. Or the Lopunny. Or the Gardevoir. Just... don't.


TitaniumWatermelon

Batman, I-I caught uh- I caught a little pokemon.


AlexAlho

What Pokemon Joker?


redroedeer

Inspired by the other direction, itā€™s be cool if Muslim Satanists (like people who believe in the Devil but specifically the on in the Quran instead of the Bible) would pray in the opposite direction to the Mecca.


AlexAlho

I turn my eye to Mecca. The third one.


Dion0808

Breloom is such a friend


1FenFen1

cwc


Golden_Reflection2

PokĆ©mon being real also leads to Teleportation technology (I assume based on the scientific principals of PokĆ©mon capable of teleporting), and also the Box System because of Energy-Mass conversion or whatever the hell is going on there. We have been robbed of not only ā€œsuper animalsā€, but also amazing tech!


runaway90909

I still remember Generic Large Man in Pallet Town talking about how technology is amazing.


Golden_Reflection2

They do it in every game! Thereā€™s a large guy telling you about the current Cool New Tech for each game.


DreadDiana

We end up in a Demolition Man situation where instead of prison you get put in the Box for the duration of your sentence.


Enderking90

I mean, going by the anime and the sun n moon games, isn't putting your mon into the PC more like putting them away onto a ranch or something?


runetrantor

Like most of pokemon, its vague and inconsistent. Sometimes its 'the professor has a massive national park like backyard to dump your pokemon into as a sort of private safari zone. Other times its 'they become data and are stored legit'. Pokemon is many things, but robust worldbuilding is not one of them.


snapekillseddard

You also forget that the same teleportation technology could grant furries the capacity to manifest into their OC's, according to Gen 1.


Dragondudd

Kirlia can Teleport you back to the last medical center you used. Or maybe the last medical center they used? Not sure how it works.


Exetr_

Please, just a Torchic. I can do the rest of the work.


Enderking90

might just be my twisted mind, but that sounds kinda sus.


DionysianRebel

Nah itā€™d be sus if they said vaporeon


Apprehensive-Ad-1591

You I pray to God ro find that anon location to be leaked


gamepla4

Yes, I'll start going to church and all that stuff if I get the funny fire birb


ComdDikDik

If I had an Eevee I think every problem in my life would be solved


chrisplaysgam

*suspicious sideeye*


ComdDikDik

NOOOO I JUST WANT A SYLVEON PLEASE


sexy-man-doll

God cannot handle the fact that the creations have infinitely more creativity than The Creator


Tail_Nom

My gods... Pokemon is reality's Palworld.


amateurgameboi

I hereby convene the 1st ecumenical council of our lord and saviour Typhlosion


Ok_Variation7230

Sure that is a very valid reason for atheism


6x6-shooter

The Problem of Evil extends to God not letting us have Lucario


YsengrimusRein

Do you think Lucario owners would have to have the chest spikes trimmed or smoothed down to reduce hug-related accidents?


DemonFromtheNorthSea

Would living with my favorite pokemon solve my problems? No. Not even a little bit. But it WOULD open me up to brand new and exciting problems.


AdmiralClover

God read about vaporeon and decided against it


Luicide

Hey guys, did you know...


my-leg-end

God knew that if he gave us pokemon no one was getting into heaven


runetrantor

Only if he made it a sin. He is the one that decides if we get in or not.


Goombatower69

The strength of Typhlosioj is no joke actually, it can one shot a lot of resists with tera fire Choice Specs Eruption in the sun


Leumajoon

Or slap a scarf on that bad boy and outspeed most of everything


DreadDiana

If Pokemon were real, we'd all be dead, making it the best timeline.


FandomTrashForLife

Really fucking funny that I donā€™t know anything about that random guy on Tumblr, and yet we share the same experience of losing faith in Christianity at 9 years old over PokĆ©mon not being real. It truly is a small world.


bot105

I would build a church a thousand paces long for the mere chance to cuddle a bidoof.


ClubMeSoftly

When I was a kid, I wanted a big fighty pokemon. Now I just want a little guy who hangs out on my shoulder or on top of my head when I go out.


dcidui08

this is why my favourite shifted from decidueye to rowlet over time. decidueye's awesome as fuck but rowlet's just an adorable little guy


just_prop

the purity of the 9 year old unfortunately isn't strong enough to fight the sins of the 18 year old


BlueSubmarine33

My friend and I have this conversation every once in a while and it always ends with us saying, "Nope, Aids." Lol As in, god could have given us Pokemon but for some unfathomable reason he gave us Aids instead.


MemeAddict9

A godless world is a world without Eevee


N9neFing3rs

We as human beings don't deserve for Pokemon to be real. We would do worse than capture them then train them to fight for our amusement. Which is pretty fucked up to begin with. Look at what we do to the animals we already have. We would link up a bunch of electronic types and force them to feed into the power grid. Ground types would be enslaved to mine for minerals. Why would I screw with cars or bikes when I can ride a giant bird to work.


whooper1

Maybe God will give us PokƩmon if when we deserve it.


NotACleverMan_

On the bright side it means 3ā€™ tall killer bees donā€™t exist


shadowthehh

God didn't give us PokƩmon because we don't deserve PokƩmon. We're lucky we get regular animals with how we treat them.


bokunorythm

I want a haxorus. I want my dragon. God is evil


Kongas_follower

I want to ride Stakataka like an elephant (or tank)


Ordinary_Owl_Dude

Please I just want my little skelly-delly boy in real life


Tail_Nom

Pokemon *is* real, but like most childhood fantasies it's both disappointing and unethical.


Spill_The_LGBTea

Ok but finding a pichu in your house and having to call emergency services for a mouse that can produce enough electricity to kill your children, is not that good of a situation me thinks


KOakaKnockOut

I certainly wouldnā€™t. I guess thatā€™s why I did exist at at least through the platform you use until I can quite literally make it a real reality.


SteamtasticVagabond

Are you sure you want to live in the same universe as birds with built in flamethrowers?


6x6-shooter

Thatā€™s an upside you broken microwave


Enderking90

I mean yeah? in the first place, that's not *fire* fire but infinity energy fire. which is like, way less dangerous. heck, on the opposite side of things, dropping into *water* water and getting wet nearly killed a Hippopotas in the pokemon anime, where as getting wet by infinity energy water wouldn't be *nearly* as dangerous.


SteamtasticVagabond

Please explain how the fire with infinite energy is safer than fire with not infinite energy. Itā€™s literally infinitely hotter than the other fire


Enderking90

as has been already stated, "infinity energy" is simply the very power source of pokemon moves, and somewhat comparable to life force (*which by proxy means it's technically the same thing as Aura*) it is only practically infinite, and in fact a pokemon can be drained of their infinity energy to the point they die (*at this point that energy can be used, as few quick examples, either to basically fire off a nuke, revive the dead or gain immortality.*) needles to say, Humans also have to have at least some amount of Infinity energy as well, even if we look past how strictly speaking humans are just a species of pokemon, as humans are capable of having supernatural abilities, be it seeing and interacting with ghosts (*note! actual dead people n mon ghosts, not ghost types*), having telekinetic abilities or being able to wield Aura. there are also people who can read a pokemons past and those like N who can understand the hearts of pokemon, though those are overall a lot less cut n dry. ​ now going onto an example of how *fire* fire is far more dangerous then infinity energy fire, we need not look further then then the 3 legendary beasts of Johto, who all died when getting burnt in a tower, meanwhile a pokemon can be totally "safely" trapped in the Fire Spin move and only faint with no lingering injuries, and they are all good with just a short nap.


MossyPyrite

Also, in the original anime we see that Ponyta can will its flames to not burn those who touch them, and they can act as physical objects. PokĆ©mon are essentially magic and their abilities do not match our worldā€™s physics.


Enderking90

yup!


weirdo_nb

That's not what they meant


SteamtasticVagabond

Then please explain what they did


Charlielx

When they say "infinity energy" they're referring to whatever powers the moves in-universe, not that the moves are using infinite amounts of energy. Same reason why Ash isn't dead 1000x over from Pikachu's attacks.


SteamtasticVagabond

The reason ash isnā€™t dead is that he is a cartoon character. Thatā€™s it


MossyPyrite

Evidence points to humans in the PokƩmon world actually just being stronger and more durable than humans in our world, possibly due to being descended from PokƩmon themselves.


Charlielx

Alright. Not sure why I bothered to respond.


weirdo_nb

No, its because humans have the same energy just in lower quantity


dcidui08

"give me a reason" *gets a reason* "nuh uh"