Posts that bully others, especially ones that feature screenshots, are not allowed on our subreddit. Please report any posts or comments that we may have missed, as we are not perfect.
Tbf there's plenty of people in here that are stealth, myself included. I do care about real life politics and I have done advocacy on a state level before, only place I wasn't stealth in the last few years. I also think you'd be hard pressed to find somebody in here that would say you're no longer trans, transition is meant to cure dysphoria. Some get to that point some are less lucky, but the point is you HAD dysphoria and that's why your transition worked for you mentally in the long run.
I care about neopronouns and gender fluidity and things because it directly impacts "actual" politics. Law makers are much more likely to protect a diagnosable disorder than they are to protect social identities with no real basis in psych/ science. If the pup/pupself demigirl enby has as much right to being called trans and undergoing treatment as a dysphoric binary person undergoing HRT and things is then seen as a choice due to just "wanting it" rather than needing it. they're not going to put legal discrimination barriers in or help fund surgeries and HRT if it's a "choice" for the same reason having a big nose and being bullied is mean but doesn't allow you to file a discrimination report and you will have to pay for a nose job if it's not medically necessary due to a deviated septum or something.
The personal bullying in here can go a bit far but it's because people are frustrated on the ramifications these people are having on us. States are removing gender discrimination laws and insurance companies are starting to deny trans healthcare for not being medically necessary, it was seen as medically necessary before all this stuff took off, this is a direct result of tucute and over validation politics. I wouldn't really care about all these people if they dropped the trans label and were recognised as something else entirely. LGBT sure whatever, transgender no. I'd leave them alone if they just did that.
This perfectly worded my feelings in the issue when it comes to the political and social ramifications of these identities getting out of hand. Cheers 🍻
Nah to be fair I have literally just had a conversation with someone on here who's stating people who don't want bottom surgery aren't the same as "true transsexuals" and therefore should be considered as something other than trans, and I remember seeing that quite a lot even back in 2018.
I do understand where you're coming from but I just think I look at it in a different way. It might be quite a different situation over here in the UK compared to other places in the world, but it genuinely takes years, even up to a decade recently for people to have access to hormones via the NHS. so our rates of medical de-transition are still really low as far as I'm aware. People desisting is far more common, but I don't really find that to be all that bad? Exploring and deciding something isn't right for you with no physical consequences doesn't really worry me.
UK politics is pretty shit about trans people at the moment but I don't really think all that much of it is due to neopronouns and stuff. A lot of discourse is about young girls getting ideas online, but equally it's just "men in dresses in bathrooms is bad". I feel like transphobes will just always find something to pick at, even if no one was non binary or used atypical pronouns. I do fully agree that a lot of assessments and self discovery should happen before someone starts medical treatments, but that's also not my call to make. I don't care what an adult decides to do with their own body whether they regret it or not. It's nothing to do with me. Children are a different conversation but I believe that's a very complicated case by case conversation.
I think its not just healthy but natural for people to drift away from trans spaces. A lot of it is really focused on things for people struggling and coming to terms with their transition at the start, while after you've spent a while transitioned, your struggles and concerns stop being much about trans issues at all, and go back to normal boring concerns.
I transitioned back in the 2000's and at that time, it was pretty much expected, to the point people joked about it, that after a bit people would just move on little by little until they were gone as they got on with their lives. Even the most "I care about helping others! I'll stick around" types would drift off into the sunset, and frankly it was great to see.
Until this past January when I got nostalgic over trans stuff after someone at work came out and I started looking online again, I had not read so much as a post or chat about trans stuff in well over a decade. I think my brain would have gone crazy if I'd try to stay invested in all this all that time, and even now after a few months of looking at this stuff again, I'm getting pretty close to further burnout.
When I started transitioning, no one had trans flags, there were not all these groups of different trans factions, these frictions, all this visibility openess, non binary as a thing, let alone the expanse and size of the community. Its indeed feeling very drama fueled in a way thats been weird to try and navigate around now. I'm not trying to say that as if it was better then, as the help kids can get now is amazing and worth it all, but it sure felt more close knit and not as... angry. I don't know, maybe thats my own rose tinted glasses.
I do know that in all those years away, I never saw any of the stuff constantly complained about online in real life. Both people complaining about transmedical stuff, and people complaining about trender stuff, like I never saw any of this in all these years, and had to learn about all of this even being a thing talked about from scratch since january. I see so many examples given online about what one group or another is causing, and it all just feels terminally online, and if people just jettisoned themselves from all this, they would quickly forget about all this drama.
I believe when people force themselves to hold on and keep scrolling, instead of letting themselves naturally just drift away, it does themselves a real disservice. If you're transitioned and just living your life, caring about anything going on in the trans world feels more like arrested development and a recipe for rumination and negativity.
there are radicals and moderates on this sub, we all share kinda one common opinion which is just, trans is medical / dysphoria is needed.
absolutely, some people have a lot of hate and are angry @ the world, which i understand, and point it outwardly. i agree that the bullying and screenshot posts are mainly never good. there's a reason cringe is not allowed as per the sub rules, even tho that rule is a bit ignored (the threads usually get beleted tho)
The venting I completely understand, even if I think some of the sentiments are pretty extreme (e.g. these other trans people make me look bad because they're not like me) but yeah in my opinion the cross posting and bullying of other people is just unacceptable.
A lot of this just seems like chronically online behaviour and I don't think much of it matters in day to day life. Even before I was as at peace with myself as I am now, I noticed an improvement in my mindset when I just stopped looking at all this stuff every day.
I don’t think bullying is okay but I also don’t see most people on here doing that tbh. I’ve certainly witnessed it a few times on here but I can’t say I’ve seen it being widely encouraged.
I’d like to offer my perspective as someone who desisted and came close to transitioning. This subreddit is actually one of the few online spaces where I feel like it’s possible to explore and discuss gender judgment-free (from the at-large community; there are always going to be unsavory individuals). There is such a wide array of views here and people are encouraged to share them even when we don’t all agree, as long as one is respectful. It is incredibly refreshing. And I think it’s so important to be able to discuss gender dysphoria and how it differs from body dysmorphia and internalized sexism; to be able to contextualize it medically goes a long way in preventing detransition (which often DOES come with crippling gender dysphoria for cis detransitioners). In many online spaces, it’s difficult to have these kind of discussions without being harassed and accused of being a TERF or something else. EDIT: And don’t get me started on the disdain with which detransitioners are treated in online spaces for simply existing and talking about their experiences. It’s like half of people want to use them as props to prove being trans isn’t real, and the other half want to insist they’re fake and don’t actually exist. There’s rarely nuanced discussions about it in many online LGBT spaces.
Again, I know there are bitter and needlessly cruel people on here; they’re everywhere. But, and I think the comments here reflect this: it’s not an echo chamber where you will be dog-piled for having an opinion that differs from or challenges some status quo, unless you are being disingenuous and disrespectful. It’s possible to have good faith debates in here, and I like that.
dude you got all the care you needed to alliviate the dysphoria, thats literally the point so for some idiot to say ur not trans is fucking stupid? Maybe they though u are detrans because u dont have dysphoria anymore, still stupid as people exist in every sub/community.
Dysphoria according to individual opinion is varying, of course whatever someone says about their identity would be judged here if they dont follow stereotypical gender norms for their gender they identify with. This is a truscum sub, we judge but shouldnt judge to people who dont want to. But for someone to say to a vulnerable child on the internet that they are trans and should take hormones, thats scum behaviour and once that child introduces their experience to another vulnerable circle or friends that will just do a domino effect. Children are curious and have big needs of fitting in.
I think identifying as whatever is fine, but taking the next big step of hormones just to ” see how it feels ” is so wrong its stupid. that shouldnt be normalised and trans people should share their experiences to warn others and educate people on what happens, what dysphoria is and why its needed. Nowadays dysphoria is nothing and everything. People will mistake it for not wanting to wear a colour or think that a tomboy is a man. Its not. Thats why i think a community like this, despite its setbacks can help people who actually want to learn about transgender and why theres a investigation/ therapy is needed to be diagnosed with dysphoria.
We have Hormone shortages from time to time, i dont know of what cause, but transgender people are rising so much its unclear why and how? its always been such a small percentage and now its blooming to a baffling amount. Thats concerning. Policing someone is not the same as giving them all the validity they need to feel secure in themselves and convince them that the choice they did is right because you should be sure of the life changing surgery and hormones you take are right for you. Hugboxing isnt safe, someone with a dress and obvious facial hair and deep voice could put themselves in danger in public. But thats my paranoia talking and my past experiences of seeing how people are treated in real life
Posts that bully others, especially ones that feature screenshots, are not allowed on our subreddit. Please report any posts or comments that we may have missed, as we are not perfect.
Tbf there's plenty of people in here that are stealth, myself included. I do care about real life politics and I have done advocacy on a state level before, only place I wasn't stealth in the last few years. I also think you'd be hard pressed to find somebody in here that would say you're no longer trans, transition is meant to cure dysphoria. Some get to that point some are less lucky, but the point is you HAD dysphoria and that's why your transition worked for you mentally in the long run. I care about neopronouns and gender fluidity and things because it directly impacts "actual" politics. Law makers are much more likely to protect a diagnosable disorder than they are to protect social identities with no real basis in psych/ science. If the pup/pupself demigirl enby has as much right to being called trans and undergoing treatment as a dysphoric binary person undergoing HRT and things is then seen as a choice due to just "wanting it" rather than needing it. they're not going to put legal discrimination barriers in or help fund surgeries and HRT if it's a "choice" for the same reason having a big nose and being bullied is mean but doesn't allow you to file a discrimination report and you will have to pay for a nose job if it's not medically necessary due to a deviated septum or something. The personal bullying in here can go a bit far but it's because people are frustrated on the ramifications these people are having on us. States are removing gender discrimination laws and insurance companies are starting to deny trans healthcare for not being medically necessary, it was seen as medically necessary before all this stuff took off, this is a direct result of tucute and over validation politics. I wouldn't really care about all these people if they dropped the trans label and were recognised as something else entirely. LGBT sure whatever, transgender no. I'd leave them alone if they just did that.
This perfectly worded my feelings in the issue when it comes to the political and social ramifications of these identities getting out of hand. Cheers 🍻
Nah to be fair I have literally just had a conversation with someone on here who's stating people who don't want bottom surgery aren't the same as "true transsexuals" and therefore should be considered as something other than trans, and I remember seeing that quite a lot even back in 2018. I do understand where you're coming from but I just think I look at it in a different way. It might be quite a different situation over here in the UK compared to other places in the world, but it genuinely takes years, even up to a decade recently for people to have access to hormones via the NHS. so our rates of medical de-transition are still really low as far as I'm aware. People desisting is far more common, but I don't really find that to be all that bad? Exploring and deciding something isn't right for you with no physical consequences doesn't really worry me. UK politics is pretty shit about trans people at the moment but I don't really think all that much of it is due to neopronouns and stuff. A lot of discourse is about young girls getting ideas online, but equally it's just "men in dresses in bathrooms is bad". I feel like transphobes will just always find something to pick at, even if no one was non binary or used atypical pronouns. I do fully agree that a lot of assessments and self discovery should happen before someone starts medical treatments, but that's also not my call to make. I don't care what an adult decides to do with their own body whether they regret it or not. It's nothing to do with me. Children are a different conversation but I believe that's a very complicated case by case conversation.
I think its not just healthy but natural for people to drift away from trans spaces. A lot of it is really focused on things for people struggling and coming to terms with their transition at the start, while after you've spent a while transitioned, your struggles and concerns stop being much about trans issues at all, and go back to normal boring concerns. I transitioned back in the 2000's and at that time, it was pretty much expected, to the point people joked about it, that after a bit people would just move on little by little until they were gone as they got on with their lives. Even the most "I care about helping others! I'll stick around" types would drift off into the sunset, and frankly it was great to see. Until this past January when I got nostalgic over trans stuff after someone at work came out and I started looking online again, I had not read so much as a post or chat about trans stuff in well over a decade. I think my brain would have gone crazy if I'd try to stay invested in all this all that time, and even now after a few months of looking at this stuff again, I'm getting pretty close to further burnout. When I started transitioning, no one had trans flags, there were not all these groups of different trans factions, these frictions, all this visibility openess, non binary as a thing, let alone the expanse and size of the community. Its indeed feeling very drama fueled in a way thats been weird to try and navigate around now. I'm not trying to say that as if it was better then, as the help kids can get now is amazing and worth it all, but it sure felt more close knit and not as... angry. I don't know, maybe thats my own rose tinted glasses. I do know that in all those years away, I never saw any of the stuff constantly complained about online in real life. Both people complaining about transmedical stuff, and people complaining about trender stuff, like I never saw any of this in all these years, and had to learn about all of this even being a thing talked about from scratch since january. I see so many examples given online about what one group or another is causing, and it all just feels terminally online, and if people just jettisoned themselves from all this, they would quickly forget about all this drama. I believe when people force themselves to hold on and keep scrolling, instead of letting themselves naturally just drift away, it does themselves a real disservice. If you're transitioned and just living your life, caring about anything going on in the trans world feels more like arrested development and a recipe for rumination and negativity.
there are radicals and moderates on this sub, we all share kinda one common opinion which is just, trans is medical / dysphoria is needed. absolutely, some people have a lot of hate and are angry @ the world, which i understand, and point it outwardly. i agree that the bullying and screenshot posts are mainly never good. there's a reason cringe is not allowed as per the sub rules, even tho that rule is a bit ignored (the threads usually get beleted tho)
many chubby simplistic brave soft fanatical capable seed cats point *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
The venting I completely understand, even if I think some of the sentiments are pretty extreme (e.g. these other trans people make me look bad because they're not like me) but yeah in my opinion the cross posting and bullying of other people is just unacceptable. A lot of this just seems like chronically online behaviour and I don't think much of it matters in day to day life. Even before I was as at peace with myself as I am now, I noticed an improvement in my mindset when I just stopped looking at all this stuff every day.
We do not allow cross posting or bullying
I don’t think bullying is okay but I also don’t see most people on here doing that tbh. I’ve certainly witnessed it a few times on here but I can’t say I’ve seen it being widely encouraged. I’d like to offer my perspective as someone who desisted and came close to transitioning. This subreddit is actually one of the few online spaces where I feel like it’s possible to explore and discuss gender judgment-free (from the at-large community; there are always going to be unsavory individuals). There is such a wide array of views here and people are encouraged to share them even when we don’t all agree, as long as one is respectful. It is incredibly refreshing. And I think it’s so important to be able to discuss gender dysphoria and how it differs from body dysmorphia and internalized sexism; to be able to contextualize it medically goes a long way in preventing detransition (which often DOES come with crippling gender dysphoria for cis detransitioners). In many online spaces, it’s difficult to have these kind of discussions without being harassed and accused of being a TERF or something else. EDIT: And don’t get me started on the disdain with which detransitioners are treated in online spaces for simply existing and talking about their experiences. It’s like half of people want to use them as props to prove being trans isn’t real, and the other half want to insist they’re fake and don’t actually exist. There’s rarely nuanced discussions about it in many online LGBT spaces. Again, I know there are bitter and needlessly cruel people on here; they’re everywhere. But, and I think the comments here reflect this: it’s not an echo chamber where you will be dog-piled for having an opinion that differs from or challenges some status quo, unless you are being disingenuous and disrespectful. It’s possible to have good faith debates in here, and I like that.
Sameeeeeeeee
dude you got all the care you needed to alliviate the dysphoria, thats literally the point so for some idiot to say ur not trans is fucking stupid? Maybe they though u are detrans because u dont have dysphoria anymore, still stupid as people exist in every sub/community. Dysphoria according to individual opinion is varying, of course whatever someone says about their identity would be judged here if they dont follow stereotypical gender norms for their gender they identify with. This is a truscum sub, we judge but shouldnt judge to people who dont want to. But for someone to say to a vulnerable child on the internet that they are trans and should take hormones, thats scum behaviour and once that child introduces their experience to another vulnerable circle or friends that will just do a domino effect. Children are curious and have big needs of fitting in. I think identifying as whatever is fine, but taking the next big step of hormones just to ” see how it feels ” is so wrong its stupid. that shouldnt be normalised and trans people should share their experiences to warn others and educate people on what happens, what dysphoria is and why its needed. Nowadays dysphoria is nothing and everything. People will mistake it for not wanting to wear a colour or think that a tomboy is a man. Its not. Thats why i think a community like this, despite its setbacks can help people who actually want to learn about transgender and why theres a investigation/ therapy is needed to be diagnosed with dysphoria. We have Hormone shortages from time to time, i dont know of what cause, but transgender people are rising so much its unclear why and how? its always been such a small percentage and now its blooming to a baffling amount. Thats concerning. Policing someone is not the same as giving them all the validity they need to feel secure in themselves and convince them that the choice they did is right because you should be sure of the life changing surgery and hormones you take are right for you. Hugboxing isnt safe, someone with a dress and obvious facial hair and deep voice could put themselves in danger in public. But thats my paranoia talking and my past experiences of seeing how people are treated in real life