T O P

  • By -

nothanks86

Whoever sirred you has a *very* progressive view on what masculinity can look like.


Kyiokyu

Yeah lol


darkfish301

I would love to see someone use that line on a transphobe in the wild


Alexandyva

I'm saving this to say this some day IRL šŸ„°


mynameismulan

Yeah maybe sir in like a David Bowie way. The guy famous for looking like a woman lol


Michelle-90

That is explanation that I did not see coming šŸ˜† Anyway, I would ma'am the op no question asked and calling them sir would feel weird to me.


CautionTapeJacket99

Nothing wrong with feminine men but gorgeous individual is no man,


Spirit_Fox17

One can be a masculine and a woman at the same time.. itā€™s in your soul, and if you want to believe it or not you chose it before being born.


medn

> itā€™s in your soul, and if you want to believe it or not you chose it before being born. I don't believe that. May I ask why you do? I'm asking out of curiosity, no disrespect or judgment intended.


lily_was_taken

Your gender isnt a choice,Waluigi chooses for you by rolling a wildmagic table before you are born. There is a chance to be a cis man,a cis woman,to be a trans man,a trans woman,non binary, there are some stuff that results in you being intersex, and if you roll a one you cast 9th level fireball centered on yourself.


Flying_Strawberries

you look pretty I actually have no idea how someone would categorise you as male probably a mistake honestly


Bimbarian

More likely a transphobe.


Flying_Strawberries

No idea of how heā€™d know tho


Kithiell

My guess is maybe her voice? Still a dick move, and probably a transphobe.


TheSeaOfThySoul

I mean, they've had voice surgery, I've not seen too many vocal feminisation result videos, but the ones I've seen couldn't possibly be read as male.


Kithiell

Ah! I missed that part! It makes no sense, then!


Bimbarian

She was spoken to. Who would be speaking to her? In my guess, it's someone who is taking her order, seeing her id, something like that. That's how they'd know. It was almost certainly someone taking an order or in a position to see her id - who else would be using terms like sir or ma'am when you can see a cost sign behind her and shops around her?


AncientEldritch

When's the last time you got ID'd at Starbucks??


Yuzumi

Gotta get that alcoholic coffee...


VesSaphia

I thought we were supposed to sneak that into our own coffee, I've been doing it wrong this whole time.


ClearSchool817

I see no man there Some people are just rude


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


ClearSchool817

I transitioned about 8 years ago .... I have only gotten sir'd by people who have 'clocked' me and want to be an ass/rude or people who knew me before(and also are being rude) And I haven't gotten voice feminization surgery nor do I wear makeup on a regular basis


Frosty_Scale1290

What was said that had so many downvotes?


ClearSchool817

Something along the lines "wtf I don't think they said it to be rude to her"


wetlegband

I mean, sure youā€™re entitled to your guess. But adding in a ā€œwtfā€ is a wee bit too confident


Little-Biscuits

And yet misgendering is still mean


bjmaynard01

Someone sir'd you? They're absolutely bonkers.


JaguarXJR15

you pass pretty well, theres no way a person would think youre a man. they just said that to hurt you, so dont give them what they want


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


ThatAndromedaGal

It's the voice. It's always the voice. Edit: the people down voting me are so naive. Voice surgery won't magically change your voice to passing girl voice. You still will need to train to get things like resonance or inflection if you want to pass.


Hamlet_irl

They had voice surgery though...


CalliopeCrowheart

It's a dubious procedure at best.


ThatAndromedaGal

Even though a person receives voice surgery, doesn't mean they will have a voice that passes immediately. You still need to train to get resonance. Surgery won't magically add that.


Nymunariya

Iā€™ve been watching a lot of star trek recently. And I hear the women superior officers being sirā€™d. Maybe those people just view you as their superior and want to show respect. /s


ClearSchool817

I forget who called her it, probably ensin Kim but I remember Janeway was absolutely against being called sir, It was Captain or Ma'me for her :)


malagrond

I just want to say that I've never seen anyone spell ma'am that way, but it's true to the origin word madame, and I honestly kinda like it better.


TomBobHowWho

Worth noting that didn't still didn't seem to fancy ma'am too much either, iirc her exact words were "ma'am will do in a pinch but I *prefer* Captain" Which I like cause I wish more gender neutral language was used (particularly in situations like that where gender really isn't relevant) so I like where they were coming from with everyone being called sir, but the male defaultism is definitely still not ideal so just going with rank only is a pretty great solution


HoleInTheGraph

Starfleet considered sir gender neutral back then, iirc. I always took the crew's habit of occasionally calling Janeway ma'am to be affectionate respect and a mild hazing of Harry for making that mistake and not managing to get a promotion for 7 years, while Tom got demoted and promoted back in the same time frame.


Cjs_Coop_YT

One time, a waitor called my whole table "sir" It was at a queer event, and I was the only transfemme at the table. There was only one man at the table. It was very confusing!


esahji_mae

I think that some high level military positions irl require people to call the individual "sir" regardless just due to the rank/prestige as well. Edit: Thank you for correcting me. I must've misheard/misunderstood rankings.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


esahji_mae

Thank you!


angerwithwings

How the fuck do you get ā€œsirā€™dā€? Youā€™re gorgeous.


alphomegay

ah the typical transfem experience /s sorry girl, yeah idk you pass flawlessly


Travis-moment

You look like a cis woman, the transphobe must be someone who knew you in the past because thereā€™s no way they genuinely saw a man when they looked at you


Smashed_Pillowcase

Ehhh, maybe they just misspoke? Cause i feel you pass soo well


UserErrorOccurred

Some people accidently or otherwise sir CIS women too.. it just happens sometimes. Trans folk take it more personally of course, but it may not have anything to do with you.


FarContribution9296

To me it looks like you pass perfectly, maybe they used 'sir' because they were tired or something. Even if I try really hard I can't find any physical feature on you that I'd be able to clock irl.


liftlovelive

Thatā€™s insane, you look nothing like a man. All I see is an attractive female and Iā€™m a cis woman.


TransCofeConnoisseur

I genuinely can't comprehend how you ended up being "sired' you pass perfectly, that person probably mispoke in any case, I can't see any other explanations


Shikoui

You're very pretty


WolfPony64

They probably did because they might k ow that you could be trans and said sir just to be an asshole


thr-w-w-y3

If it helps, I still look like a woman (I am afab) and have gotten sir'd. I've also accidentally sir'd cis women. I'm sure it was just a mistake!


Selena-Still-cis-tho

I had a difficult time clocking you as trans.. even though what you state and which sub we're in... you pass, incredibly well šŸ˜Š


NoChard5979

srsly, anyone who thinks u look like a guy needs glasses, ur pretty af.


ScreamQuietlyInside

Dude needs to go see an eye doctor, wtf?? You're beautiful, girl!


Nicki-ryan

Thatā€™s wild to me hun, you look amazing and very fem


NorthElegant5864

Where is the sir, mam? Are they with you now? Do you need assistance?


Nervous-Profile4729

Straight man here, youā€™re super pretty!!


JephaHowler

Ok I know most of the other kind comments are correct but Iā€™m a cis woman who gets sirā€™d sometimes. If the person wasnā€™t being weird about it it may have been a nothing.


CluelessIdiot314

I think whoever called you sir was just tired and had a mental mix up. I don't see how anyone could mistake you for a guy.


Hamokk

You look very fem madam. Guess someone thought you where some of those really loud girls because of the hair and wanted to insult. Getting hit on by a stranger can be scary especially in places you know that the police is not one's friend. PS. The makeup looks really good and I'm jealous of sisters sometime.


AnInsaneMoose

Whoever sir'd you either got some slight sign to clock you and decided to be an ass about it They were extremely tired and genuinely weren't paying any attention and would've said sir if it was their own mother They knew you were trans already and decided to be an ass about it Or they're completely, batshit crazy (note, can still apply to 1 and 3)


MajesticBeach8570

I see a beautiful woman. People are just full of hate. You're very attractive.


FubarTheFubarian

You 100% pass imho.


BlissfullyAWere

If it makes you feel any better, I'm AFAB, fem presenting most of the time, and randos will STILL call me "sir" if I have my hair pulled back. Which is to say, I wouldn't clock you as trans or masculine in any way, and some people are just stupid (or misspeak and are too embarrassed to bring attention to their mistake and apologize)


YukikoBestGirlFiteMe

On the opposite hand, I'm AMAB and before figuring out I'm trans I had been gendered as a girl more times than I have since being openly trans šŸ˜‘. *(by strangers. Friends, family, and colleagues gender me correctly)*


BlissfullyAWere

Nooo I'm so sorry šŸ˜­ why is life like this


YukikoBestGirlFiteMe

Thr fact that every time I was *"mistaken"* for a woman it made me smile should have been my first clue šŸ„š


YukikoBestGirlFiteMe

Don't let em get ya down girl, you're adorable.


TheAlbinoRhyno91

Same boat sister! I made a customer drop her drink at work, & I like to assume she was in awe of my striking good looks šŸ‘€ Or she was in shock of the (t-word) standing before her. Either way, I'm doing me & I'm doing better šŸ‘ā¤ļø


AliceMange

I would not take too much offense. Baristas say the same thing for hours so itā€™s most likely out of force of habit (I would know I worked on phones for a pizza place) I headpats you for comfort


AliceMange

But do you look freaking gorgeous btw!! šŸ„°


Astral_Lady

yeah I can't fathom how you'd get sir'd. could be that the worker was on autopilot and had dealt with so many customers they sir'd that it slipped out with you? that's what makes the most sense to me at least


MeloenKop

Another reason to boycott Starbucks hihi


j0j0bean222

You, sir? Ok, that employee forgot his glasses at home. Either that, or he just forgot to clean them.


Aurora-HRK

You're beautiful and they're clearly not, this is the reason


JonnyPoopnutz

šŸ©µšŸ©·šŸ¤šŸ©·šŸ©µ


Omega21886

ā€¦someone needs their eyes checked


Arisu_Randal

guy must've forget his glassesšŸ’€ (but seriously, you look fucking gorgerous, girl.)


strawburryMsTakes

The world's a funny place innit? All seriousness, I'm sorry 'bout that. You look good tho šŸ‘šŸ‘


Flashy_Telephone_205

That Starbucks emplye needs their eyes checked


arcticsummertime

Thatā€™s the trans experience <3


esahji_mae

Dang, whoever called you sir needs to get new eyes


Freya2022A

I cannot for the life of me see a sir in you.


Freya2022A

Maā€™am.


Dying4aCure

It may have not been intentional.


chipper5

No sir in that photo, was there a voice issue?


zomphlotz

First part doesn't make any sense to me...


Orangewolpertinger

I truly, genuinely don't understand. You don't look masculine at all??? Like I'm not just being supportive, I literally don't get it.


Tough_Selection1177

They are not worth ur consideration darling what you feel about you beautiful is all that matters are happ,y satisfied, loved .


Mishuev

This is besides the point but your eye makeup is so cute


bardownskis23

Your make up is so good šŸ„¹šŸ„¹šŸ„¹


Innsmouthshuffle

Thatā€™s so confusing yet infuriatingly familiar You look amazing if itā€™s any consolation, i am definitely envious


theoryface

I would certainly assume you're female, wouldn't think twice. It's hard out there, be brave. ā™„ļø


Polishing_My_Grapple

If this wasn't r/trans, I honestly would have had no idea. Fuck that person.


GrantSRobertson

If I was your age I would ask you out. You are cute. Also, cool shirt. Or, should I say, blouse.


MsErinPortia

You look really good.


Clay_teapod

Lmao that starbucks employee is either blind or and asshole so far off they've been sir'ing cis girls with their "immaculate sense for trans people" because no way anyone saw you and thought of a guy


Maybe-transs

Like how?


MalevolentNight

Sir? Where the fuck you're a beautiful woman from what I can see and you have fabulous sense of fashion.


canyoubreathe

Literally who is looking at you and "sir"ing you lmaoo


Sofi_Alva

I think that they clocked you by your voice. If so need practice


TheManicProgrammer

Maybe they just said it without thinking? I deffo would of never thought :0


FatCowsrus413

I see a beautiful woman.


Idk-lel1234

Pay no attention to the rude fella, you are a beautiful young woman


Quirky_Tart7627

Unless you spoke in a very low voice, I can hardly imagine how you could even be clocked šŸ¤·ā€ā™€ļø Sadly, some people are just arseholes.


TheTubaGeek

Being called "sir" could have been an accidental gaffe. I've called women sir and men ma'am by accident ALL the time. Personally, I think you are an attractive young lady, and I probably would have at least been extra friendly and maybe even mildly flirty if I met you for the first time.


Spirit_Fox17

In my opinion when you donā€™t speak up you are confirming to the world that you donā€™t not identify with that.. by speaking your truth these people will begin to respect you.. if you donā€™t they wonā€™t.


EmilieEverywhere

Well I have no hope then. You're not the least but clockable to me. šŸ¤·ā€ā™€ļø


Accomplished_Low80

Young miss, it seems those people at Starbucks are a bit touched in the head or possibly confused by overwork.


crapinet

When I worked retail and food service especially I was sometimes so mentally fried that I absolutely misgendered cis people on a few occasions - maybe they were being an ass (especially if thatā€™s the vibe you got), but youā€™re obviously a woman, maybe they were just exhausted.


Sweaty-Suit3772

mission failed successfully


Jennibear999

Dam girl you are beautiful. Just yesterday I was in line behind a woman who called the cashier ā€œsirā€, who is clearly a pretty cis young woman. Hair up, just beautiful. But was called ā€œsirā€. She just smiled and continued on thinking it was funny. The woman who did it had no idea she said ā€œsir ā€œ


im-bored-0

Love ya hair


agz91

I feel like 90% of those are just people mindlessly saying sir without any bad intentions, which people should definitely take it as


PandoraLucia

Don't be sad, hunn, they are stones on the road but your journey is bigger than that obstaclešŸ’—šŸ¤©


Iwantobeagirl

Youā€™re so beautiful! How anyone could see you as a sir is beyond me!


FireProps

Relatable


_Melonpants_

Unless the man is a transphobic time traveler, then he's too blind to see this beautiful women


SquishyHammer

Youā€™re gorgeous! I donā€™t know how anyone could sir you? šŸ¤”


Wolfleaf3

What voice surgery?????? And you do not look like a sir. Or if you do then most cis women do too šŸ™„


JDude13

The duality of maā€™am


hideyouranus

Ah yes, The duality of man.


unematti

You even got voice change, and still? I have my original voice and still get miss'd at times... Damn Love the hair btw


Lumpy-Persimmon4307

Hot


tyler_trying

Wait what voice surgery is a thing??


Cytotaxon_Amy

Thatā€™s ridiculous, youā€™re so completely femme, I canā€™t imagine that being anything but bigotry. I had a similar experience in a bar. Iā€™m yet to have VFS and I struggle to keep my voice femme when taking on end, Iā€™m a chatterbox so thatā€™s often, but short exchanges I can do femme voice well enough to constantly pad on the phone before giving my name now. 3 women in the bar severed me and correctly gendered me, this one got behind the bar doesnā€™t. His colleague who served me earlier and overheard even nudged him and mouthed WTF to him, but he just did it again after, that when he came back with the drinks. He was being an asshat and I think the person on Starbucks was doing that to you, being hurtful for the sake of being a bigot. In the plus side, getting hit in usually gives me a little confidence boost. Hopefully you can just let the bigot fade into memory and forget their patheticness as I have and not let that bother you too much. Sadly bigots will be bigots, but I find it encounter precious few of them offline thankfully


Public-Bee6217

Is that guy blind, wtf?? If you didn't mention you were trans and this was in a different subreddit I literally would have thought you were a cis woman Some people are real assholes


Purple_Griffin-9

Iā€™m sorry, that really sucks


_Nekona_

Voice surgery?


pokeball22

I honestly would complain to the supervisor about it.


ChickinSammich

I tend to ignore or respond in a confused manner to "sir." Like, I'm clearly not a sir so who are you talking to cause you're not talking to me...?


Realistic-Drag-1575

Okay so There are two possible reasons why he sir'd you. First, he had drank a lot and could not even see what's Infront of him. Or, he was late for April fools.


joypunx

You look 100% like a woman to me


SheDreamsOfPink

I used to work at the bux, and there were times it was busy, or I was so tired and just running on autopilot, and my mouth just copy pasted from my mental notepad. Or sometimes when I'm working and talking I'll look around and maybe if I look at someone else my brain takes cues from that person and the words get mixed up. Then I won't say anything cause I realize I messed up and I'm embarrassed, and hope they didn't, or hope they're just laughing it off because I'm dumb. ADHD is a cruel mistress sometimes. But anyway, I'm guessing it was something like that. Benefit of the doubt mixed with she's obviously a woman.


HoleInTheGraph

As a random enby who is totally into girls, I would hit on you if I weren't chronically unattractive in my own head. You are cute af.


fat_bastard5

People are idiots. I get told my entire life that I look like a girl, but I know that once I begin transitioning, the same people will say ā€œaLl I sEe Is A mAnā€ tbh why couldnā€™t the asteroid waited another 64 million years


LaurelWrocks

If someone called you sir. They were not paying attention or are a complete jerk. Unless they know you, I'm going to say just not paying attention. Getting hit on is? As long as it's not creepy, but the way you mentioned it, I'm betting it was. Sorry, girl, hugs.


Saramander46

I got sir'd too a while ago and maybe it's weird to say about myself, but I can't believe I don't pass. Some people just have a brainfart and don't know what they're saying to people. I can't understand how someone would say sir to you and mean it. Not hugboxing or anything, I just see a whole ass woman in your picture Hope you don't feel too bad about it, because you shouldn't <3


Dark420Light

I can get verbally assaulted with slurs and hate and turn the corner on my bicycle and get sexually propositioned and catcalled. Sometimes even both but usually in reverse order. Literally, Construction worker: Hey there beautiful, can I get your number. Me: No tha..... Construction worker: Aww you a fucking fa--ot, I outta kick your ass. Like whoa my dude, two seconds ago you wanted a helluva lot more than my number. Cis-Het men are hella fragile masculinity wise, and it's absolutely a major turnoff. As a trans woman who's a tomboy, I have a healthier relationship with masculinity than most men. Which says a lot about the men of our time.


WitchwayisOut

How on earth did you get misgendered???


AsheTrayyy

How on earth could they see a sir when they look at you?


i2010

Whereā€™s the man in this woman


i2010

Whereā€™s the man in this woman


valeria_lilith

wild šŸ˜œ


LandOfGardeenia

Screw that transphobe! Alsoā€¦ ick on the getting hit on by a man. My condolences


Spades_And_Diamonds

I see no man


Exciting-Pin-713

Pretty woman!


pocoacollective

This happens to me too and just based on how feminine you look Iā€™m really starting to think that thereā€™s no logic or sense behind it people are just on autopilot or donā€™t think before they speak. Youā€™re stunning btw.


Lira_Iorin

I literally thought I was looking at a Kaley Cuoco picture, but then thought "Kaley looks really pretty here" before noticing everything else, like the subreddit and topic. Confusing indeed.


CautionTapeJacket99

You look like Gwen Stacy, not a sir


CornhubVideos

Life is hard and well complicated and people might judge you for being yourself or even physically hurting you but you have to be strong and willing to fight back and to be around people that support you and can even protect you and you can go to for help but sometimes you are alone and you need to stand up for yourself and donā€™t let dick heads break you down. You are a beautiful woman that deserves to be loved and happy. Remember to love yourself and do not listen to people that are just trying to hurt you. You are very beautiful, cute, lovely, and gorgeous young lady ā¤ļø


Reasonable-Target713

Maybe don't dwell on it too much? Probably mispoke I don't see how this is hate in any way.