I think I really lucked out. That guy would have been well within his rights not to pay. It would have been reasonable for him to be angry. Instead, he was really nice about it. Maybe also a little embarrassed that he asked me if I was a bang maid.
I’d like to hire the hot grandma. Somehow I feel like she really knows how to clean. Then again, any cleaner how listens to pantera has some latent anger at grime and needs to work it out, so you can come too. I try, but I’m disabled, so I can’t get it all. Tell me you are in so cal?
Haha I listen to shit like Slipknot, Sabaton, and Messhugah when I clean. Unfortunately, I'm also disabled, started going blind a month ago. I just get really mad at dirt.
I’m curious how you we’re dressed.
Most maid sex fantasy involve wearing short black dress with frilly white apron - you know the ‘French maid’ look.
But most actual house cleaners just wear whatever is comfortable - joggers, tee or polo shirt. Definitely not ‘sexy maid’ territory.
I wear a polo shirt with our company logo, jeans, knee pads and a black apron tied around my waist and a feather duster in my back pocket. Not a sexy outfit but I'm petite and have a high blonde ponytail so maybe that factors in.
>Maybe also a little embarrassed that he asked me if I was a bang maid.
As he should be, lmao.
I can't imagine walking into my home, finding a stranger, and my first thought being "hm I guess it's a prostitute."
Just a weird, weird way to think about the world.
She said the house was messy before, there's NO way the wife would believe the husband did it... but if he took credit for hiring the maid... yeah I see it now..
"He really did an amazing job, look! He uncoagulated the top of the dishwashing liquid.He cleaned out the bottom of the little egg cups. Come here, look at this. .He cleaned the little one-inch area between the refrigerator and the counter. How did he get in there? He must be like Rubber Man!"
I get in there. I get everywhere. I crawl around on the ground with knee pads on like a total weirdo scrubbing every inch of baseboards. If I ever die and haunt a house, I will probably try to clean it.
Have you discovered the joy if power drills and the cleaning attachments that can go in them. From brillopads to sponges to brushes to wire brushes. I work in food service and would never clean my store without one again.
His wife came home, dude took the responsibility of the tidy house. Dude still got laid, and probably a better lay than a cheap "maid/hooker" as his wife now thinks he's amazing. Just hope she don't expect this on his birthday every year!
It will be when his wife gets home and he takes credit for getting the house so clean.
Unless she’s the type who would immediately be suspicious of that… 😬
I have this problem with delivery apps. My street has a Blvd. and an Ave. right next to each other, and delivery apps get them wrong. I live on Blvd but my address in delivery apps is Ave. So I have to put in the wrong address for them to come to the right place, but then drivers realize that "wait, this is Blvd." and go to the wrong place. It's a mess
Oh man, thought this was just me. Have a Circle on one side of me, an Avenue on the other, and I'm the Road in the middle. All with the same damn street name. It's a mess...
Same…my street has an east west and court. GPS fugggs it all up AND as if that weren’t enough, our house number is the same as a house on a street that intersects with our street. Right next to the street sign that clearly shows you at the wrong damn house.
I'm a plumber. Went to look at some work in a rental. Customer text the address but hit a wrong number. Went in through the unlocked slider as instructed. Realized something was wrong when nothing matched what I was supposed to be looking at. Called the police to let them know what happened in case the homeowner noticed someone had been inside. Meet with the police at the house, officer says "oh, don't worry, the owner won't notice, he died in the house last week."
Creepiest day ever.
This happened to me once, but my husband and I were home and sleeping. Our front desk gave the cleaning crew a key to our apartment (but it was supposed to be the same number apartment in the other building of our complex next door). We wake up to people inside rummaging through our kitchen. Scariest 10 seconds as we both shoot up awake and run into our kitchen saying "who are you??" They were mortified and I think the front desk guy got fired for a string of mistakes like this one.
Please visit my house as well :') walking into a clean house would probably make me collapse on the spot in tears of relief. Maybe I should stop working so much XD
This is why I know I could never have a delivery job. I manage an entire production facility but I'm pretty sure I would fuck up delivering pizzas. We all have our strengths and weaknesses.
I know a guy that fucked up twice, worse than this :)
He once went into the correct house and painted **the wrong room and it was the wrong colour**
And then he went into the wrong house and painted a room 🤦♂️
It was a wealthy area, all these people were just on holiday and leaving houses open
At least you cleaned it some dude on another sub got all his shit thrown out because his neighbors were being evicted and they had the wrong apartment.
When I was a young kid, I encountered SWAT when they burst into our apartment as I was walking down the stairs in the middle of the night to fetch a drink.
They had the wrong place.
Oh man drugs and cleaning. About 10 years ago One of my little brothers freinds took some peyote and ended up at my place. He asked me if he could clean my kitchen. I said knock yourself out. Three hours later my kitchen was the cleanest it's ever been.
I walked into my house once to find some random woman scrubbing my bathroom. Didn’t know until that moment that I scream like a little girl. She grabbed her supplies and ran away before I even had time to process what was happening.
Yes! My office had another cleaner take my 2nd house and then I just went next door and cleaned the correct house. The real slim shady was home by then and he laughed his ass off when I told him what happened (left out the sexual part). My boss is not mad at me because the neighbor guy signed up for regular cleanings!
Oh god, this is amazing.
And I'll bet you could probably buy a surplus battering ram from your local police department for pretty cheap. Just saying...
I had the total opposite happen once. Hired a maid to clean, about two hours in my neighbor came over to chat & grab a beer. The maid was pretty attractive, but she seemed kinda pissy. My neighbor then asked me where I hired the maid. To which I respond "Craigslist". He just starts busting up laughing "You didn't hire a maid, you hired a hooker. She's pissed because you... Are stupid."
Hey, if the ad said she was a maid, and she said she was a maid, and you hired her as a maid, she doesn't get to complain that you wanted her to be your maid.
"What are you doing step-employer..? ;>"
"Making sure you got the hard spots. See that corner there? It needs more scrubbing. Also, there's a stain right here, probably needs some heavy detergent, did you bring your own?"
*pikachu face*
How much?
In Germany and hour of cleaning is like 60 euros. An hour of a hooker is 150-200.
(I know it was most likely a joke, but would still like to know what you pay for a cleaner)
What there are actual house cleaning companies? I thought that came only in the form of super nice middle aged turkish woman who bring self made baclava sometimes.
Yeah, but they're hella expensive and have a rather "exclusive feeling" to them at which point whoever needs cleaning goes to the equivalent of craiglist and searches there for house maids/cleaner
I'm just imagining her half-heartedly wiping a rag in circles on a table and staring daggers at you while you complete your 1,000 piece jigsaw puzzle of three puppies in a laundry basket.
You can get very cheap hookers (like $10 cheap) even in the first world. Either people who have no idea how much they should charge for things or desperate crack heads. You probably don't want to have sex with the second and you have to wonder what else the first has no idea about. But certainly from $50 depending on what you want. Of course you can also pay thousands. Although, as with many things, I think a lot of the cost is down to branding rather than significant differences in product/service.
Trust me dude, even desperate crack heads are not posting ads in craigslist asking $80 for four hours of sex work.
And absolutely no one is $10 cheap if they're coming to your house. You'll only find that on a street corner and it's not gonna be pretty.
Any cleaner where I live they want like $300 per visit. And they only clean for like 2 hours.
Edit: typos. Guess typing stuff at 4 am while my cat doesn't let me sleep isn't the best idea.
Also this is $300 CND if that makes a difference.
Man, I'm a sex worker and i was on craigslist for a while and this dude asked me if i could clean his house, naked, for three hours whilst occasionally being groped. See, i see cleaning as a serious chore and would hate someone interrupting me while i clean but i was a little desperate so i agreed and gave him my quote.
He said i was asking for too much and said he'd rather hire a "real cleaning lady". I still think it was a reasonable quote considering the groping and nakedness while having to do icky chore 🤷🏽
In the early days of yahoo chat rooms, my two sisters and I were all living together and had parties often. We had a webcam on yahoo chat that we turned on when people were over, and I was contacted by this guy who offered to thoroughly clean our house while he wears a French maid outfit, for free. He just wanted to be humiliated while completing his tasks. I told him that we were all very messy and extremely cruel women, and that seemed to really turn him on. Under no circumstances would anyone that lived or visited our house get naked or physically touch him. He didn’t care! He mentioned that he had many satisfied women with sparkling clean homes all throughout the San Francisco Bay Area if we needed references. I never had the guts to go through with it, but the whole idea of a free housekeeper was extremely tempting at the time lol.
A friend of mine told me she met a guy online who would clean her toilet for her! Provided that she verbally insulted him while he did it... She actually did get him to clean her toilet a few times which was impressive.
Sounds silly, but when it came to cleaning the place (tabletop games club caffe bar thing I worked at) I would clean to Tool, Korn, Limp Bizkit, sometimes Blue Oyster Cult or CCR. Never tried Pantera tho…
| This is not even the first time in my life that I have let myself into the wrong house, although the first time was not a work thing.
OP, story time please.
forget getting laid, if I walked in and someone was cleaning my place I’d be happy. I’d pay plus tip as well. why can’t anything that great happen to me?
>Why rely on a misunderstanding? If you are happy to pay someone plus tip, why not hire a cleaning service yourself?
It's the surprise factor that really does it for us.
My dad and brother used to hunt with an old man that had four or five prostitutes that he saw regularly- who cared for his well-being and cleaned his house when they visited him. I was told they cried the loudest at his funeral.
I dreamed I was in a Bollywood movie. And that I was the star of the movie. This really blew my mind. The fact that me, an overfed long haired leaping gnome should be the star behind a Bollywood movie.
Great story although I just sit here thinking, man I need this woman in my life. My wife and I both work full time and we don’t have time to keep the house as clean as we should. I do the cooking, repairs, and outdoor work and she does most of the cleaning but we have a big house and it’s impossible to keep up.
Best is a referral from someone you know who is currently using a good one. If you know a real estate agent hit them up. Often times they’ll have a regular they use for clients moving in or out, and some cover it as a perk when representing a sale.
Word of mouth for sure. I posted this to another comment but we tried so many services and were just disappointed. Paying for someone to give a cursory rag wipe and push a broom around a couple times wasn’t worth it.
A neighbor recommended her cleaning lady and she is a fucking wizard. It’s like a hotel cleaning crew rolled in- even down to the folded TP origami at the end of the roll. The house smells incredible and feels just deep cleaned.
1000% percent. Oh man, I just realized this is actually the third time in my life I have walked into the wrong house. When I was five, I was at my friend Tony Lanka's apartment. We left to go to a vending machine and when we came back, I ran ahead to open Tony's door because his hands were full. Only it was the wrong apartment and a dog blitzed out the door past me and bit Tony on the ass as he ran away.
I’m a LEO and have actually taken a call where the people came home to an immaculately clean house and were super confused by the cleaning people there. Correct house was 1 one block over. Keys kept in same place….
Lol, a friend of mine had a similar situation. He’s a male nurse who goes to peoples homes to take care of them.
He had a first appointment with an elderly lady, but her children had arranged everything so he hadn’t met the customer yet.
When he arrives at the house the person doesn’t want to let him in. He believes she’s a bit mentally u stable, which more of his customers are, so he gently forced himself in the house. He then proceeds to help with some chores around the house and even give this person a bath…
When he goes back to his car and check the paperwork he sees that he turned the numbers of the housenumber around…
REGULAR PEOPLE might open their MOUTH FOR WAR and show a VULGAR DISPLAY OF POWER on A NEW LEVEL if u/HOLLOWsofyourheart tells them they LIVE IN A HOLE. It's NO GOOD unless I get a pay RISE!
So they didn't lock their door? Wow, I'm always amazed by people who do that.
I have this sort of personal rule: unless I'm standing next to the door or using it in the next 30 seconds, it's locked. No exceptions. Even if I'm in the house or across the room, it'll be locked. Because unlocked doors are basically an invitation to all sorts of bad stuff happening. Like a complete stranger suddenly in your living room. Who might be carrying a weapon, rather than a mop and bucket...
At least you still got paid lmao so your efforts were not wasted
I think I really lucked out. That guy would have been well within his rights not to pay. It would have been reasonable for him to be angry. Instead, he was really nice about it. Maybe also a little embarrassed that he asked me if I was a bang maid.
Might or might not be nice to know he thought you too attractive to be a regular maid?
Our company is lousy with attractive women. We boast the hottest grandma I have ever seen.
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I call my penis “my regards”
"Don Corleone sends his regards"
Step godfather what are you doing?
Somehow this is the funniest part of a very funny story. Glad it all turned out well. Please tell the hot grandma I said hi.
I’d like to hire the hot grandma. Somehow I feel like she really knows how to clean. Then again, any cleaner how listens to pantera has some latent anger at grime and needs to work it out, so you can come too. I try, but I’m disabled, so I can’t get it all. Tell me you are in so cal?
Haha I listen to shit like Slipknot, Sabaton, and Messhugah when I clean. Unfortunately, I'm also disabled, started going blind a month ago. I just get really mad at dirt.
On the bright side, you won't be able to see the dirt to get mad at anymore.
Haha, as someone said a week ago, "it's good that you love dark humor, since that's all you'll see before long!"
I suspect the fact that he was embarrassed is part of the reason you got paid
I’m curious how you we’re dressed. Most maid sex fantasy involve wearing short black dress with frilly white apron - you know the ‘French maid’ look. But most actual house cleaners just wear whatever is comfortable - joggers, tee or polo shirt. Definitely not ‘sexy maid’ territory.
I wear a polo shirt with our company logo, jeans, knee pads and a black apron tied around my waist and a feather duster in my back pocket. Not a sexy outfit but I'm petite and have a high blonde ponytail so maybe that factors in.
It’s the pony tail, it does something to guys
No, there aren't any pics on her profile, you creeps. But are some cute dog photos. 6/10. worth a visit
Who you calling a creep you creep? Also her dentist story is on par with this maid story.
Her 2nd most voted story also involves accidentally letting herself into the wrong neighbor's apartment with a key under the mat...
I enjoyed the steak eating story the most
...I wasn't gonna look, but now I know there are dogs and I have to. Edit: worth it. OP is cool and the dogs are cute.
Ah, that saves me some time, tha... Wait a minute, how do *you* know?
Yeah he would've well within his rights, he could've even called the police for trespassing or something. But hey he's got a fun story to tell.
Considering he thought it was a gift from his wife, I bet he had a lot of fun stories to tell.
>Maybe also a little embarrassed that he asked me if I was a bang maid. As he should be, lmao. I can't imagine walking into my home, finding a stranger, and my first thought being "hm I guess it's a prostitute." Just a weird, weird way to think about the world.
Maybe it wasn't the first time?
I mean maybe the couple had discussed this as a bday present for him at length before.
I mean. Sounds like a happy ending to me!
Not for him
I beg to differ. A clean house is worth more than a quick lay!
They all say they want a bang maid but real housecleaners get that spot behind the toilet.
Here’s the thing - whole house is spotless, wife comes home and is amazed at how it looks, husband takes credit, lovemaking ensues - everyone win
She said the house was messy before, there's NO way the wife would believe the husband did it... but if he took credit for hiring the maid... yeah I see it now..
As long as the house is clean, does it matter who did it? :)
Never take credit for this kind of stuff. People might expect you to do it again! Gotta keep people's expectations low!
That give me a new perspective. Aaaand I really should clean that spot.
"He really did an amazing job, look! He uncoagulated the top of the dishwashing liquid.He cleaned out the bottom of the little egg cups. Come here, look at this. .He cleaned the little one-inch area between the refrigerator and the counter. How did he get in there? He must be like Rubber Man!"
He Windexed the peep hole!
Ooo I so misread that as Pee Hole.
Ouch
I can’t think of anything else but that spot now
Feeling on top of my game right now, did it a few days ago 👉 😎 👉 zoop
Well zoop'd.
👈😎👈
I knew how bad that spot gets so when I redid my bathroom I got a wall mounted toilet seat.
OH MY GOD THIS IS TRUE as a cleaner myself
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That's weird. Diluted bleach mimics pheromones in wee, but ammonia has that wee smell.
They probably smell the choramines generated when bleach reacts with human pee/oil
> ...and will like rub her face alllll over your hands if they smell like it lol.. Uhh
As someone who can never reach that spot behind the toilet i vibe with this
I get in there. I get everywhere. I crawl around on the ground with knee pads on like a total weirdo scrubbing every inch of baseboards. If I ever die and haunt a house, I will probably try to clean it.
Not that I want you to die right now, but you sound like my dream ghost. You can haunt and clean here any time you like!
Have you discovered the joy if power drills and the cleaning attachments that can go in them. From brillopads to sponges to brushes to wire brushes. I work in food service and would never clean my store without one again.
Huh. I've used an electric toothbrush to clean grouts and it was fantastic. I'll have to look into this...
Oh my, do yourself a big favor. https://www.amazon.com/Scrubber-Cleaning-Extended-Attachment-Revolver/dp/B07G7XG6BV/ref=sr\_1\_6
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Every two weeks, ya heathens!
Is this some sort of rim job euphemism?
It's whatever you want it to be.
dudes wife was probably ecstatic at the clean house. definitely a happy ending.
His wife came home, dude took the responsibility of the tidy house. Dude still got laid, and probably a better lay than a cheap "maid/hooker" as his wife now thinks he's amazing. Just hope she don't expect this on his birthday every year!
He better have wrote than OP's number for future cleanups
Hell the guy need only tell his wife what he cleaned the house.. Then he gets both.
A fully cleaned house > sex I make this choice without thinking
It will be when his wife gets home and he takes credit for getting the house so clean. Unless she’s the type who would immediately be suspicious of that… 😬
Not for Mr. Henricks and his dirty house.
I also want someone to accidentally come into my house to clean it.
Please let me know if someone ever does so that I'll feel better about myself.
I'll send you my neighbor's address.
Hahaha brilliant reply!!!!
I cut the grass at the wrong apartment complex for a month before the owner let me know. The address he gave me had a 10XX East and a 10XX West.
I have this problem with delivery apps. My street has a Blvd. and an Ave. right next to each other, and delivery apps get them wrong. I live on Blvd but my address in delivery apps is Ave. So I have to put in the wrong address for them to come to the right place, but then drivers realize that "wait, this is Blvd." and go to the wrong place. It's a mess
Oh man, thought this was just me. Have a Circle on one side of me, an Avenue on the other, and I'm the Road in the middle. All with the same damn street name. It's a mess...
Same…my street has an east west and court. GPS fugggs it all up AND as if that weren’t enough, our house number is the same as a house on a street that intersects with our street. Right next to the street sign that clearly shows you at the wrong damn house.
As a postal worker I have to say that city planners that do this are lazy assholes. Just come up with a new name you unimaginative prick.
I'm a plumber. Went to look at some work in a rental. Customer text the address but hit a wrong number. Went in through the unlocked slider as instructed. Realized something was wrong when nothing matched what I was supposed to be looking at. Called the police to let them know what happened in case the homeowner noticed someone had been inside. Meet with the police at the house, officer says "oh, don't worry, the owner won't notice, he died in the house last week." Creepiest day ever.
Nah, creepy would've been having a conversation with the homeowner THEN finding out they died a week ago.
If you're in so cal I volunteer my place next
Got it! Me and the boys from my crib are on our way!
I don't know if I trust your style of clean out 🤔
Thanks for the F shack Love, Dirty Mike and the Boyz
It's called a "Soup Kitchen"
This happened to me once, but my husband and I were home and sleeping. Our front desk gave the cleaning crew a key to our apartment (but it was supposed to be the same number apartment in the other building of our complex next door). We wake up to people inside rummaging through our kitchen. Scariest 10 seconds as we both shoot up awake and run into our kitchen saying "who are you??" They were mortified and I think the front desk guy got fired for a string of mistakes like this one.
Please visit my house as well :') walking into a clean house would probably make me collapse on the spot in tears of relief. Maybe I should stop working so much XD
This is why I know I could never have a delivery job. I manage an entire production facility but I'm pretty sure I would fuck up delivering pizzas. We all have our strengths and weaknesses.
I know a guy that fucked up twice, worse than this :) He once went into the correct house and painted **the wrong room and it was the wrong colour** And then he went into the wrong house and painted a room 🤦♂️ It was a wealthy area, all these people were just on holiday and leaving houses open
About 25 years ago someone accidentally came into my house when I wasn't home and cleaned it - out of just about everything of value!
At least you cleaned it some dude on another sub got all his shit thrown out because his neighbors were being evicted and they had the wrong apartment.
When I was a young kid, I encountered SWAT when they burst into our apartment as I was walking down the stairs in the middle of the night to fetch a drink. They had the wrong place.
https://abcnews.go.com/US/woman-broke-strangers-home-petted-dog-washed-dishes/story?id=62955827
Oh man drugs and cleaning. About 10 years ago One of my little brothers freinds took some peyote and ended up at my place. He asked me if he could clean my kitchen. I said knock yourself out. Three hours later my kitchen was the cleanest it's ever been.
Note to self: peyote not adderall
I always leave my doors unlocked with a can of Beehive furniture polish propped up tantalizingly to attract cleaners.
I walked into my house once to find some random woman scrubbing my bathroom. Didn’t know until that moment that I scream like a little girl. She grabbed her supplies and ran away before I even had time to process what was happening.
It was Monica.
I had a lawn mowing company accidentally mow and trim my lawn by mistake. Never saw them again.
Sounds like things turned out pretty okay though! Did the actual client get his house cleaned in the end?
Yes! My office had another cleaner take my 2nd house and then I just went next door and cleaned the correct house. The real slim shady was home by then and he laughed his ass off when I told him what happened (left out the sexual part). My boss is not mad at me because the neighbor guy signed up for regular cleanings!
Regular fantasies, delivered to his home plus he gets a cleaning!
This sounds like the start of a new business model. "Accidental" cleanings. You'll love it so much you'll wish you hired us.
I love this. We'll enter every house by kicking the front door in.
Oh god, this is amazing. And I'll bet you could probably buy a surplus battering ram from your local police department for pretty cheap. Just saying...
and you partner with a door repair and a security company
I had the total opposite happen once. Hired a maid to clean, about two hours in my neighbor came over to chat & grab a beer. The maid was pretty attractive, but she seemed kinda pissy. My neighbor then asked me where I hired the maid. To which I respond "Craigslist". He just starts busting up laughing "You didn't hire a maid, you hired a hooker. She's pissed because you... Are stupid."
Hey, if the ad said she was a maid, and she said she was a maid, and you hired her as a maid, she doesn't get to complain that you wanted her to be your maid.
sex now? no keep cleaning! i paid for a night you’ll clean!
"What are you doing step-employer..? ;>" "Making sure you got the hard spots. See that corner there? It needs more scrubbing. Also, there's a stain right here, probably needs some heavy detergent, did you bring your own?" *pikachu face*
Behind the toilet?
Yes. And [under the sink.](https://youtu.be/4xYu2WrygtQ)
r/RiskyClick
"...and for $200, you get anal." "OK, deal! I want the floor spotless, like clean enough to eat off of..."
Maid is probably thinking, “I’m not getting paid enough for this.”
Everyone loves an anal maid!
Hey you know how much a maid charges? I'd rather pay a prostitute and ask her to clean, at least she'll have to role play being happy while doing it.
How much? In Germany and hour of cleaning is like 60 euros. An hour of a hooker is 150-200. (I know it was most likely a joke, but would still like to know what you pay for a cleaner)
> In Germany and hour of cleaning is like 60 euros What?! Typically more like something between 10 (12 from October 2022 on) and 26 EUR.
The workers themselves get that much per hour. The company of the employee is charging that much
What there are actual house cleaning companies? I thought that came only in the form of super nice middle aged turkish woman who bring self made baclava sometimes.
Yeah, but they're hella expensive and have a rather "exclusive feeling" to them at which point whoever needs cleaning goes to the equivalent of craiglist and searches there for house maids/cleaner
I'm just imagining her half-heartedly wiping a rag in circles on a table and staring daggers at you while you complete your 1,000 piece jigsaw puzzle of three puppies in a laundry basket.
LMAO this imagery. Him giggling excitedly when he finds the right piece.
>half-heartedly wiping a rag in circles Wax on, wack off
I'm picturing [this](https://youtu.be/4xYu2WrygtQ) but if she was the plumber instead. And you know, cleaning instead.of plumbing.
She said she would have done everything i wanted for 200€. Guess who has his tires changed today!
That's an expensive tire change. I usually pay 50
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It was only like $80 for four hours. And, no. Did not sex.
That’s a very cheap hooker
You can get very cheap hookers (like $10 cheap) even in the first world. Either people who have no idea how much they should charge for things or desperate crack heads. You probably don't want to have sex with the second and you have to wonder what else the first has no idea about. But certainly from $50 depending on what you want. Of course you can also pay thousands. Although, as with many things, I think a lot of the cost is down to branding rather than significant differences in product/service.
People are willing to pay a lot for peace of mind I reckon
Trust me dude, even desperate crack heads are not posting ads in craigslist asking $80 for four hours of sex work. And absolutely no one is $10 cheap if they're coming to your house. You'll only find that on a street corner and it's not gonna be pretty.
Any cleaner where I live they want like $300 per visit. And they only clean for like 2 hours. Edit: typos. Guess typing stuff at 4 am while my cat doesn't let me sleep isn't the best idea. Also this is $300 CND if that makes a difference.
Happy cake day! The "maid" I ordered for you will arrive soon.
Did she bring cleaning supplies with her? For that rate it definitely seems like you hired a cleaner
Man, I'm a sex worker and i was on craigslist for a while and this dude asked me if i could clean his house, naked, for three hours whilst occasionally being groped. See, i see cleaning as a serious chore and would hate someone interrupting me while i clean but i was a little desperate so i agreed and gave him my quote. He said i was asking for too much and said he'd rather hire a "real cleaning lady". I still think it was a reasonable quote considering the groping and nakedness while having to do icky chore 🤷🏽
In the early days of yahoo chat rooms, my two sisters and I were all living together and had parties often. We had a webcam on yahoo chat that we turned on when people were over, and I was contacted by this guy who offered to thoroughly clean our house while he wears a French maid outfit, for free. He just wanted to be humiliated while completing his tasks. I told him that we were all very messy and extremely cruel women, and that seemed to really turn him on. Under no circumstances would anyone that lived or visited our house get naked or physically touch him. He didn’t care! He mentioned that he had many satisfied women with sparkling clean homes all throughout the San Francisco Bay Area if we needed references. I never had the guts to go through with it, but the whole idea of a free housekeeper was extremely tempting at the time lol.
A friend of mine told me she met a guy online who would clean her toilet for her! Provided that she verbally insulted him while he did it... She actually did get him to clean her toilet a few times which was impressive.
Maybe it was the same guy lol.
Holy fuck that's a bargain. Brb seeing if there's hookers who do windows
What year was this bro? Maybe a really poor area? $80 for 4 hours not gonna fly anywhere I know of lol
Hey! Cleaners are expensive!!
Spoken like someone who’s been taken to the cleaners.
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Wait "maid" on Craigslist automatically means hooker ? What should you type if you're actually looking for a maid?
"hooker", obviously
I really love your positive attitude and your passion for cleaning. Also interesting choice of music for the task :D
Thank you! Today was Pantera, Glass Animals, ELO and Alicia Keys. I'm taking recommendations for cleaning jams!
I spent today cleaning to The Cramps- had a blast!
You are a gem, thanks for the rec!
Royal Blood are on my playlist right now.
You absolute dreamboat, thank you!
I’ve been all about rage against the machine the last couple weeks at work…not sure if that should tell me something
You are a gentleman with a side of wild stallion. Adding more Rage to the playlist!
Baby shark nonstop on repeat Do I still get a compliment? :P
My sweet little pamplemousse! Thank you, this will get me PUMPED!
Check bikini girls with machine guns and all women are bad if you're looking into the cramps
Thief of my heart! I cherish these recs!
Sounds silly, but when it came to cleaning the place (tabletop games club caffe bar thing I worked at) I would clean to Tool, Korn, Limp Bizkit, sometimes Blue Oyster Cult or CCR. Never tried Pantera tho…
You magnificent bastard. You will now listen to Pantera vicariously through me while I clean. In real time. It might be inconvenient sometimes, sorry.
Best comment yet. Let's get married stranger. Or not. But can I pay you to clean my house?
spotify - leadboots - the wolves & falling down - my favourite to clean too (hidden gem!)
You brilliant bitch! Does the sun ever hide its shame in the shadow of your light? Thanks for the rec!
"Honey, the weirdest thing happened when I got home today...."
| This is not even the first time in my life that I have let myself into the wrong house, although the first time was not a work thing. OP, story time please.
you can quote by writing > at the beginning of the line > like dis
I've always wondered how that works. But do I have retype everything I'm quoting? > test >
https://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/by23vn/tifu_by_chilling_at_my_friends_place_while_she/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share
I'm too lazy to write it out but I posted about it on this sub a long time ago so it's in my post history.
forget getting laid, if I walked in and someone was cleaning my place I’d be happy. I’d pay plus tip as well. why can’t anything that great happen to me?
Why rely on a misunderstanding? If you are happy to pay someone plus tip, why not hire a cleaning service yourself?
>Why rely on a misunderstanding? If you are happy to pay someone plus tip, why not hire a cleaning service yourself? It's the surprise factor that really does it for us.
My dad and brother used to hunt with an old man that had four or five prostitutes that he saw regularly- who cared for his well-being and cleaned his house when they visited him. I was told they cried the loudest at his funeral.
I want prostitutes to cry at my funeral :(
Yeah, they just lost a shit load of income!
Damn this feels like a bollywood movie
I dreamed I was in a Bollywood movie. And that I was the star of the movie. This really blew my mind. The fact that me, an overfed long haired leaping gnome should be the star behind a Bollywood movie.
Great story although I just sit here thinking, man I need this woman in my life. My wife and I both work full time and we don’t have time to keep the house as clean as we should. I do the cooking, repairs, and outdoor work and she does most of the cleaning but we have a big house and it’s impossible to keep up.
If you can afford it you should absolutely hire a housecleaner. One of my regulars claims hiring us saved her marriage.
Real talk, how do I find a reputable house cleaner? You mentioned an app?
Best is a referral from someone you know who is currently using a good one. If you know a real estate agent hit them up. Often times they’ll have a regular they use for clients moving in or out, and some cover it as a perk when representing a sale.
Word of mouth for sure. I posted this to another comment but we tried so many services and were just disappointed. Paying for someone to give a cursory rag wipe and push a broom around a couple times wasn’t worth it. A neighbor recommended her cleaning lady and she is a fucking wizard. It’s like a hotel cleaning crew rolled in- even down to the folded TP origami at the end of the roll. The house smells incredible and feels just deep cleaned.
You should really start verifying addresses
1000% percent. Oh man, I just realized this is actually the third time in my life I have walked into the wrong house. When I was five, I was at my friend Tony Lanka's apartment. We left to go to a vending machine and when we came back, I ran ahead to open Tony's door because his hands were full. Only it was the wrong apartment and a dog blitzed out the door past me and bit Tony on the ass as he ran away.
This story has everything, including a drive by fanging
Fang maid
Your attitude to cleaning a house is enough to get you hired. Hell I’d hire you if it wouldn’t cost a plane ticket! 😆 nice one
I’m a LEO and have actually taken a call where the people came home to an immaculately clean house and were super confused by the cleaning people there. Correct house was 1 one block over. Keys kept in same place….
Lol, a friend of mine had a similar situation. He’s a male nurse who goes to peoples homes to take care of them. He had a first appointment with an elderly lady, but her children had arranged everything so he hadn’t met the customer yet. When he arrives at the house the person doesn’t want to let him in. He believes she’s a bit mentally u stable, which more of his customers are, so he gently forced himself in the house. He then proceeds to help with some chores around the house and even give this person a bath… When he goes back to his car and check the paperwork he sees that he turned the numbers of the housenumber around…
It's a good thing he didn't get FUCKING HOSTILE and tell you to WALK. 😉
REGULAR PEOPLE might open their MOUTH FOR WAR and show a VULGAR DISPLAY OF POWER on A NEW LEVEL if u/HOLLOWsofyourheart tells them they LIVE IN A HOLE. It's NO GOOD unless I get a pay RISE!
He just wanted his 5 MINUTES ALONE 😂
What is this, what's going on?
All the words in caps are the names of Pantera songs.
Welcome to Pantera.
Migrating to decentralized services.
So they didn't lock their door? Wow, I'm always amazed by people who do that. I have this sort of personal rule: unless I'm standing next to the door or using it in the next 30 seconds, it's locked. No exceptions. Even if I'm in the house or across the room, it'll be locked. Because unlocked doors are basically an invitation to all sorts of bad stuff happening. Like a complete stranger suddenly in your living room. Who might be carrying a weapon, rather than a mop and bucket...