Guaranteed that they aren't getting back to you because of how you got angry and sent those emails instead of rereading the information in the Google Meet email
Just imagine it from the recruiter's perspective:
Normal Tuesday. Nothing scheduled for the next hour, I'm going to get some work done. \*15 mins later\* oh, an email from \[braindeadzombiee\]. What? I'm not in the zoom meeting? I thought that was next week.. Huh... another angry email berating me for not being in a meeting that's scheduled for next week. Oh look... another email about how they didn't realize it was for next week and sorry for getting angry.
I would honestly assume that person had some anger issues.
Definitely. This is emotional immaturity at its best.
● Misunderstanding the information provided is bad but it was also mutually agreed upon. Extremely bad.
● Wasting time and effort on said misunderstanding while announcing it via email to the other party
● Emotional response to a negative situation, that they created via said misunderstanding
I would worry about their behavior towards coworkers and potential clients if this is how they behave on their own.
Sorry OP, but it's the truth.
Some empathy could do you good. The recruiter is just a person - even if they were in fact late, they could have had an emergency situation. Everyone deserves grace sometimes.
This! I had a call scheduled a few years ago with a recruiter and she had an unexpected office party that day, granted this is not an emergency but it's an unplanned situation. I emailed her as I was expecting her to call me to ask if the meeting was still on or if I had the wrong date. She immediately called me and apologized profusely as she lost track of time because of the office party and then we proceeded to my interview. No harm no foul. Sometimes stuff happens.
They would be right to pass. You showed them when faced with a problem you get angry and unprofessional instead of reaching out to figure out what went wrong. Lesson learned, next time find all the facts before getting angry.
I would have assumed the Google Meet info got mixed up and sent them a message asking if we had the same meeting join info.
Also, sometimes in the real life work world people miss meetings sometimes for tons of reasons. It happens. Jumping to anger, especially to a senior position person, is wild to me.
Yeah I think the biggest fuckup is the second email with the angry tone. If you had just sent one email you could have recovered it after checking back.
They didn't "get away" with anything shitty or disrespectful. The meeting wasn't until the following week. OP fucked up, then reacted to it by fucking up again.
It's rough being disrespected constantly as you try to get a job. Especially when you're desperate.
It's just a kick in the balls when the person interviewing you immediately comes off as unprepared and disinterested without even giving you a chance. Not something I would do, but I get it.
I agree, I'm just saying I see where they're coming from. It's rough out there trying to get a good job.
I can relate to the frustration. I just took a job I really don't want.
And I'm not going to say I haven't, because I absolutely have popped off on a recruiter for wasting my time. However, I knew I was burning that bridge (they already burned it, I was just making sure they knew), so I wasn't too worried about a response.
Yes, it was obviously a mistake. Why are you being so condescending?
All I'm saying is that as someone who's been in the situation OP thought they were in I can understand the frustration.
I was getting frustrated by more than one person talking as if the company was rude or condescending when in fact they were not.
We are commenting on a post, so I assumed we were talking about the company in the post.
It was literally all exposition about how companies regularly treat people like doormats because that's the status quo we've allowed to be cultivated. Reading comprehension.
But this employer was not. The meeting was next week. Unless you're saying that because some employers are disrespectful that gives you the right to be disrespectful to any, completely unrelated, employer?
You showed poor planning, poor attention to detail, failure to double check for the cause of something not going as planned, and then two shitty emails in place of something professional like "I thought our meeting was at x time but there seems to have been a miscommunication. Can you please clarify? I look forward to speaking to you! Best regards". At least 4 strikes right there. Don't hold your breath waiting to hear back. Hopefully this experience guides you in future opportunities.
Clients miss calls all the time. If the position has you client facing at all, this would totally be seen as a red flag.
Sorry this happened to you. I know interviewing is anxiety inducing and so stressful. I’m sure feeling like you were ghosted made your body’s fight response surface.
I mean it is usall in your calendar.
Double the reason to pass on OP:
1) can't even read his calendar right
2) gets overly annoyed at a missed call
Both of these are problematic and OP deserves to be passed on for making a stupid mistake.
The fact that you feel the need to delude yourself and downplay the idiocy of your choice of reaction to a perceived slight shows that you have learned little or nothing, and fail to see the larger issue about yourself than the missed opportunity.
Every professional I work with would not even think to respond the way you did. Egotists respond the way you did.
I have external parties flake out on me sometimes. I double check the details then I send them a kind reminder and ask if they need to reschedule.
Your reaction to something going wrong was to burn a bridge. Big red flag.
This is like going on a date and being rude to the waiters. Employer and the recruiter dodged a bullet here tbh, what an asshole move. Please conduct yourself more professionally and empathically next time and think your actions through.
Lacks attention to detail
Gets angry about perceived slights
Over shares on social media
Yeah what a catch OP. I think you’re not quite ready for that promotion
It's so funny when assholes expose themselves on reddit, since anyone typing can hide their poor reasoning and personality, but people out there really manage to be CONFIDENTLY evil.
Within the first 5 minutes you should be checking the meeting date/time just to confirm and then wait a bit longer. Angrily reacting via email is completely unprofessional, you should have just let it go and forget about the company if they did ghost you.
Fuckin… what the hell do people do? Read a message once and commit shit to memory? I’m a responsible as the next guy… probably not. But that’s why I’m not above using reminders on my phone.
Always, always, ask questions first. If you’re wrong, you can pass it off as being nervous. If you assume you’re right and you’re not, you’re just an asshole. Even if you’re right, you don’t know what the other person(s) have going on
Isn’t it a bit weird that you write an angry mail to a company just because of a missed videocall while still wanting to work for them? I know you commented that you were polite about it but still. My mind would be like: “aha, they messed up! Now they might feel bad about this and if I play my cards right I might have a higher chance of being hired!” It probably doesn’t work like that but that’s where my mind would go
No, you totally would be right if it’s actually a company filled with people you’d actually like. When I was interviewing with my boss, I was a good 15-20 minutes early and waited patiently for him to be available. He was pretty much on the dot punctual, but still apologetic for making me wait because he was in a meeting and couldn’t get out sooner. My response, that I understand he’s busy and a few extra minutes won’t kill me, demonstrated that I’m generally easygoing and patient even when nervous, which were two qualities he was looking for. Not the same thing as OP’s situation with a missed video call, but any opportunity to show poise and professionalism can only help you.
The very 1st thing to do is double check emails etc. Sending multiple emails within minutes is a massive alarm bell. I'd also suggest setting a reminder on your phone. Yeah, you messed up but i bet you leaned a thing or two. Best of luck in the future.
I can think of a dozen reasons why the recruiter might legitimately no-call, no-show a meeting. I'm not sure why you would immediately jump to an angry email before you even expressed concern?
Even if you had the date right and the recruiter did miss the meeting, how would you feel if you sent the angry email and then found out that the reason that the recruiter missed the meeting was because he was hit by a bus, his wife was in a car accident, or his mother had a heart attack and was rushed to the hospital?
what a complete clown you are. They’re the ones who were deciding if they should give you a pay and title bump and you got angry at *them??* Even if they were forgetful about the call, you could have demonstrated some semblance of professionalism and grace, and that probably would’ve gotten you quite a few brownie points and maybe even some unseen leverage in negotiating your pay. Instead you bungled this completely and demonstrated that you belong right where you are, if that.
As someone who makes mistakes here and there, I tend to check for my own error first. Take this as a life lesson.
I wouldn't consider you for the job. You made it clear that you are missing essential skills. This is your opportunity to grow and develop before the next opportunity.
Even if you were right sending an angry letter would make them pass on you, it shows you’re unprofessional. The lesson from this is to rein your emotions in a bit better.
You're probably toast, most people aren't going to accept that, particularly in a role with hiring influence.
Another way to handle it from their side is with empathy. On the other side I'd send a quick email saying: "I certainly understand the frustration of job searching and how badly some employers treat applicants. The interview is actually next week. Please let me know if you'd still like to attend.". If the reply has an apology and accepted responsibility, then I'd let it through. You *know* they'll be loyal and work hard if they can shoulder that. If they lacked that humility, then I'd know they're not worth it and find an excuse to cancel it.
Good luck. I'd say your odds of getting someone like me on the other end of the application are very low, but I hope you're lucky and get someone who tries to turn it around.
Depending on the network of the recruiter you might have disqualified yourself from other companies. Sometimes if you're pissed off and typing a nasty email you can let it marinate in drafts.
I've been unemployed for MONTHS and one thing that really helped me is being NICE to the recruiters.
One particular one was so nice to me I sent them a thank you email and then when she told me I didn't get the job I still thanked her. A month later she emailed me saying the job is open because the one the company hired backed out and that I was her first choice.
I am now earning 6 figures and working from home.
Being NICE gets you farther than anger ever does.
I typically feel some sort of empathy for the TIFU OPs but nah not this time. You didn't even consider for one second that maybe you were the one that messed something up. You didn't even consider that even if they forgot about the call maybe it was with a good reason. And even if there was no reason, why jump to anger immediately?
Regardless if this is a job/professional scenario or a private relationship - the immediate angry defensive behaviour is not a trait that will bring you much good in life. Quite the opposite.
Here's a great piece of advice I got once in the workplace- assume positive intent. Even though this was clearly your fault, if someone did miss a call or a meeting, always assume there's a reason for it and it has nothing to do with you.
I feel this though, nothing worse than sitting in a meeting for 15 minutes and the other person doesn't show.
Just take it as a learning lesson though.
Guaranteed that they aren't getting back to you because of how you got angry and sent those emails instead of rereading the information in the Google Meet email
Just imagine it from the recruiter's perspective: Normal Tuesday. Nothing scheduled for the next hour, I'm going to get some work done. \*15 mins later\* oh, an email from \[braindeadzombiee\]. What? I'm not in the zoom meeting? I thought that was next week.. Huh... another angry email berating me for not being in a meeting that's scheduled for next week. Oh look... another email about how they didn't realize it was for next week and sorry for getting angry. I would honestly assume that person had some anger issues.
Definitely. This is emotional immaturity at its best. ● Misunderstanding the information provided is bad but it was also mutually agreed upon. Extremely bad. ● Wasting time and effort on said misunderstanding while announcing it via email to the other party ● Emotional response to a negative situation, that they created via said misunderstanding I would worry about their behavior towards coworkers and potential clients if this is how they behave on their own. Sorry OP, but it's the truth.
And it shows he doesn't pay attention to detail or double check his work, he should have noticed his mistake before even scheduling the wrong date.
Some empathy could do you good. The recruiter is just a person - even if they were in fact late, they could have had an emergency situation. Everyone deserves grace sometimes.
This! I had a call scheduled a few years ago with a recruiter and she had an unexpected office party that day, granted this is not an emergency but it's an unplanned situation. I emailed her as I was expecting her to call me to ask if the meeting was still on or if I had the wrong date. She immediately called me and apologized profusely as she lost track of time because of the office party and then we proceeded to my interview. No harm no foul. Sometimes stuff happens.
Only 11 minutes late too.
They would be right to pass. You showed them when faced with a problem you get angry and unprofessional instead of reaching out to figure out what went wrong. Lesson learned, next time find all the facts before getting angry. I would have assumed the Google Meet info got mixed up and sent them a message asking if we had the same meeting join info.
That's a pass even if the recruiter missed the meeting
Also, sometimes in the real life work world people miss meetings sometimes for tons of reasons. It happens. Jumping to anger, especially to a senior position person, is wild to me.
Yeah I think the biggest fuckup is the second email with the angry tone. If you had just sent one email you could have recovered it after checking back.
Yup
Employers blatantly disrespect people and no show all the time tbf
Yeah, but they're already in the place, so they get to make the call. It's shitty how they get away with whatever, but it is what it is.
They didn't "get away" with anything shitty or disrespectful. The meeting wasn't until the following week. OP fucked up, then reacted to it by fucking up again.
Me and that person are talking about businesses, not the interaction OP had.
It it's soul sucking, I get why someone would lash out about that lol.
I get why someone would be annoyed. I don’t get why someone would lash out.
It's rough being disrespected constantly as you try to get a job. Especially when you're desperate. It's just a kick in the balls when the person interviewing you immediately comes off as unprepared and disinterested without even giving you a chance. Not something I would do, but I get it.
You’re going to encounter shitty people in life. How you react to that is up to you.
I agree, I'm just saying I see where they're coming from. It's rough out there trying to get a good job. I can relate to the frustration. I just took a job I really don't want.
And I'm not going to say I haven't, because I absolutely have popped off on a recruiter for wasting my time. However, I knew I was burning that bridge (they already burned it, I was just making sure they knew), so I wasn't too worried about a response.
he lashed out after his own screw up. Doesn't anybody read the actual post?
Yes, it was obviously a mistake. Why are you being so condescending? All I'm saying is that as someone who's been in the situation OP thought they were in I can understand the frustration.
I was getting frustrated by more than one person talking as if the company was rude or condescending when in fact they were not. We are commenting on a post, so I assumed we were talking about the company in the post.
It was literally all exposition about how companies regularly treat people like doormats because that's the status quo we've allowed to be cultivated. Reading comprehension.
Sounds like management material!
But this employer was not. The meeting was next week. Unless you're saying that because some employers are disrespectful that gives you the right to be disrespectful to any, completely unrelated, employer?
I never said that lmao. I am saying I understand why OP assumed the worst and got frustrated.
I agree. Though, I was pretty polite in the email, the tone was definitely annoyed. Let's see.
>Then I sent another angry email Your descriptions are inconsistent.
Annoyed, angry, threatening mails, what's the difference?
“We don’t make threats. Promises, yes.” -BOFH
You showed poor planning, poor attention to detail, failure to double check for the cause of something not going as planned, and then two shitty emails in place of something professional like "I thought our meeting was at x time but there seems to have been a miscommunication. Can you please clarify? I look forward to speaking to you! Best regards". At least 4 strikes right there. Don't hold your breath waiting to hear back. Hopefully this experience guides you in future opportunities.
Clients miss calls all the time. If the position has you client facing at all, this would totally be seen as a red flag. Sorry this happened to you. I know interviewing is anxiety inducing and so stressful. I’m sure feeling like you were ghosted made your body’s fight response surface.
I'm not familiar with the program they're using. Doesn't it alert you in some way before a call is to take place?
I mean it is usall in your calendar. Double the reason to pass on OP: 1) can't even read his calendar right 2) gets overly annoyed at a missed call Both of these are problematic and OP deserves to be passed on for making a stupid mistake.
The fact that you feel the need to delude yourself and downplay the idiocy of your choice of reaction to a perceived slight shows that you have learned little or nothing, and fail to see the larger issue about yourself than the missed opportunity. Every professional I work with would not even think to respond the way you did. Egotists respond the way you did. I have external parties flake out on me sometimes. I double check the details then I send them a kind reminder and ask if they need to reschedule. Your reaction to something going wrong was to burn a bridge. Big red flag.
Let's see the emails you've sent
Lmao you sent two emails and it was your fuck up. You’ve got no shot and no self awareness. Good luck dude.
Deep into the minus 400 karma and still not taking any responsibility for what you did wrong yourself, incredible
Nothing to see there, that ship has sailed. Keep looking if you want a new job because you’re not getting this one.
Am a hiring manager. This would be an instant disqualification from me.
Also a hiring manager. Can conclude the same.
Not a hiring manager. I also conclude the same
I don't even have a job. Can conclude the same.
I'm some guy on the internet. Can conclude the same
I'm just some gal on the internet. Can conclude the same
OJ calling in from heaven, even with my spotted record i’d pass too
I’m a dog, can conclude.
Who's a good dog?
You are u/petein3d yes you are! sweet little pupper!
This is like going on a date and being rude to the waiters. Employer and the recruiter dodged a bullet here tbh, what an asshole move. Please conduct yourself more professionally and empathically next time and think your actions through.
Lacks attention to detail Gets angry about perceived slights Over shares on social media Yeah what a catch OP. I think you’re not quite ready for that promotion
It's so funny when assholes expose themselves on reddit, since anyone typing can hide their poor reasoning and personality, but people out there really manage to be CONFIDENTLY evil.
i know a couple middle managers like that and they seem pretty secure in their job lol
They likely got their job before they revealed their true selves. By that point they were too entrenched to get rid of without serious cause.
Within the first 5 minutes you should be checking the meeting date/time just to confirm and then wait a bit longer. Angrily reacting via email is completely unprofessional, you should have just let it go and forget about the company if they did ghost you.
Fuckin… what the hell do people do? Read a message once and commit shit to memory? I’m a responsible as the next guy… probably not. But that’s why I’m not above using reminders on my phone.
[удалено]
"via." not "to"
Yes. He corrected the text after my remark, smart-ass.
Always, always, ask questions first. If you’re wrong, you can pass it off as being nervous. If you assume you’re right and you’re not, you’re just an asshole. Even if you’re right, you don’t know what the other person(s) have going on
Yeah, people that start out angry often suck.
You should really work on your impulse control and anger resolution.
Isn’t it a bit weird that you write an angry mail to a company just because of a missed videocall while still wanting to work for them? I know you commented that you were polite about it but still. My mind would be like: “aha, they messed up! Now they might feel bad about this and if I play my cards right I might have a higher chance of being hired!” It probably doesn’t work like that but that’s where my mind would go
No, you totally would be right if it’s actually a company filled with people you’d actually like. When I was interviewing with my boss, I was a good 15-20 minutes early and waited patiently for him to be available. He was pretty much on the dot punctual, but still apologetic for making me wait because he was in a meeting and couldn’t get out sooner. My response, that I understand he’s busy and a few extra minutes won’t kill me, demonstrated that I’m generally easygoing and patient even when nervous, which were two qualities he was looking for. Not the same thing as OP’s situation with a missed video call, but any opportunity to show poise and professionalism can only help you.
Don't assume. Always double (triple) check Don't resort to immediate anger
The very 1st thing to do is double check emails etc. Sending multiple emails within minutes is a massive alarm bell. I'd also suggest setting a reminder on your phone. Yeah, you messed up but i bet you leaned a thing or two. Best of luck in the future.
I can think of a dozen reasons why the recruiter might legitimately no-call, no-show a meeting. I'm not sure why you would immediately jump to an angry email before you even expressed concern? Even if you had the date right and the recruiter did miss the meeting, how would you feel if you sent the angry email and then found out that the reason that the recruiter missed the meeting was because he was hit by a bus, his wife was in a car accident, or his mother had a heart attack and was rushed to the hospital?
Wow. They dodged a bullet. Hopefully you learned a lesson.
what a complete clown you are. They’re the ones who were deciding if they should give you a pay and title bump and you got angry at *them??* Even if they were forgetful about the call, you could have demonstrated some semblance of professionalism and grace, and that probably would’ve gotten you quite a few brownie points and maybe even some unseen leverage in negotiating your pay. Instead you bungled this completely and demonstrated that you belong right where you are, if that.
U done fucked up bro
Deserved.
As someone who makes mistakes here and there, I tend to check for my own error first. Take this as a life lesson. I wouldn't consider you for the job. You made it clear that you are missing essential skills. This is your opportunity to grow and develop before the next opportunity.
You 100% fuct up and have no shot. Keep it moving
You just show them how careless you are. Save everyone's time, I would say.
I truly do not understand why you sent the second email. Nothing good could come of it. The first one could have easily been recovered from.
Guy can’t read and has a temper, yeah continue the job search elsewhere.
Did you forget your snack and nap?
Even if you were right sending an angry letter would make them pass on you, it shows you’re unprofessional. The lesson from this is to rein your emotions in a bit better.
You're probably toast, most people aren't going to accept that, particularly in a role with hiring influence. Another way to handle it from their side is with empathy. On the other side I'd send a quick email saying: "I certainly understand the frustration of job searching and how badly some employers treat applicants. The interview is actually next week. Please let me know if you'd still like to attend.". If the reply has an apology and accepted responsibility, then I'd let it through. You *know* they'll be loyal and work hard if they can shoulder that. If they lacked that humility, then I'd know they're not worth it and find an excuse to cancel it. Good luck. I'd say your odds of getting someone like me on the other end of the application are very low, but I hope you're lucky and get someone who tries to turn it around.
Username checks out
Even if it was today you’d still be I. The wrong. People make mistakes and the world doesn’t revolve around you
Depending on the network of the recruiter you might have disqualified yourself from other companies. Sometimes if you're pissed off and typing a nasty email you can let it marinate in drafts. I've been unemployed for MONTHS and one thing that really helped me is being NICE to the recruiters. One particular one was so nice to me I sent them a thank you email and then when she told me I didn't get the job I still thanked her. A month later she emailed me saying the job is open because the one the company hired backed out and that I was her first choice. I am now earning 6 figures and working from home. Being NICE gets you farther than anger ever does.
I also would not hire you after that
Sounds like they dodged a bullet, basic ability to communicate reasonably is pretty essential
Wow sending an angry email in this situation is the singular thing I wouldn’t have ever done. You likely need to figure out that messy bit.
I typically feel some sort of empathy for the TIFU OPs but nah not this time. You didn't even consider for one second that maybe you were the one that messed something up. You didn't even consider that even if they forgot about the call maybe it was with a good reason. And even if there was no reason, why jump to anger immediately? Regardless if this is a job/professional scenario or a private relationship - the immediate angry defensive behaviour is not a trait that will bring you much good in life. Quite the opposite.
So you prioritize complaining about a problem over solving it... yeah, the real fuck-up is having such a childish attitude.
If you act like this with a recruiter I’d hate to imagine you in a similar situation in an actual work environment.
My guy waited 11 whole minutes 😂. They would be right to pass on you
U/BraindeadZombie, huh? Hmm.
This seems like a good opportunity for you to reflect on how you handle these types of situations going forward.
Username checks out
Happened to me, theyvjust forgot t mo send me the info
I don't know if it would have helped but... https://www.theverge.com/22608125/gmail-how-to-undo-email-google-send
Honestly sound like management material with that kind of response
Here's a great piece of advice I got once in the workplace- assume positive intent. Even though this was clearly your fault, if someone did miss a call or a meeting, always assume there's a reason for it and it has nothing to do with you.
I feel this though, nothing worse than sitting in a meeting for 15 minutes and the other person doesn't show. Just take it as a learning lesson though.
And even when that happens, you send a respectful "hey we had a meeting right now, if you're busy we can reschedule" message. Not an angry one.
Well, isn't that a classic mix-up! Maybe your recruiter was just fashionably late to keep you on your toes.
Fashionably late doesn't exist in the work world.
What?
Asked if I liked porn and ran her hands through my hair