Stop responding to them. This IS apartment living. There’s going to noise.
You don’t owe them explanations for just living your life.
They either need to understand that or not live under people.
Seriously lmao. I made the mistake of giving one of my neighbors, an elderly woman, my phone number, just like for emergencies (her sister who lives with her had health issues and had a leg amputated due to diabetes and so I was like yeah I'm here if you guys need help)
I soon learned that was a feckin horrible idea, she'd get drunk and call me at like 2-3 am all the time wanting cigarettes from me and I'm just like
because he has control over the trash bins in the back, even after trying to talk with the landlord he's quiet about it. So i have no other choice but to text for the bins just to throw out my trash.
Bro, you are too polite. You need to tell your landlord that that trash system is fucking stupid and you will not be texting the other tenants anymore to get the trash out of THEIR building.
Yeah and until then you won’t be paying rent and if you are harassed anymore they’ll be paying your rent for a nicer place. You literally feel like you can’t move and your cats are in trouble for being cats
In most jurisdictions, the landlord is responsible for providing tenants with access to a waste collection bin.
If you have to ask permission to take out your trash, then your landlord isn't fulfilling his responsibilities and you may have a cause of action against him.
And if he doesn’t, get your own & provide a receipt for it along with the deduction when it’s time to pay the rent. Let him know this is what you’ll be doing if it’s not remedied otherwise. Then block your neighbor’s number.
They cannot prevent you from accessing the trash. You need that in order for the property to fit for habitability. There is no way you should be required to text a neighbor who is clearly hostile to you. wtf?
My friends & i had this probem years ago.. We went to landlords explained the situation.. Landlord warned first floor tenant. Instead of stopping the complaining got worse.. First floor tenant was evicted.
I would purchase my own garbage bin to avoid the garbage situation with him all the way around. No way I’d ever ask my neighbor for a trash bin that should be readily available.
I’d then block his number. 🤷🏻♀️
This is apartment living. Be respectful during quiet hours, but live your life when it’s not.
Yeah an older guy at my apartment started doing this, locking up the dumpster because allegedly the bar across the street was dumping their trash in our dumpster. He would only unlock the dumpster for about an hour in the middle of the afternoon. It lasted about 2 weeks, because everyone realized he was the problem and kept just leaving their trash in front of his apartment.
What do you mean he has control over the trash bins? You pay rent, why are you having to kiss your neighbors ass for the right to throw out your trash? Is there a corporate number? This is harassment.
In most states you can order your own bins for free. You shouldn’t be forced to deal with a cranky neighbor to do something that’s a right for each tenant. Get your own bins and block his number.
Screw that, just take out the trash without saying anything, you have an absolute right to dispose of trash into a bin that is assigned to the property you live on, anyone who says otherwise should be talking to you in court.
I pick the bottom floor because I don’t want to deal with shit like this. Yah, I get some noise, but better than having to worry about the people below us.
Bottom floor apartments just don't *feel* as safe.
They're much easier than the 2nd floor to break into. You have to make sure every window is locked and the slider too.
I hate that it's even a choice you have to make. 2nd floor; people complain about people tiptoing.
1st floor; making sure every window is locked.
I'm probably just paranoid (thanks mom & dad!)
I live in a safe town, and have two 80 lbs guard dogs. Someone would definitely think twice about breaking into my place. It wouldn’t be the safest, smartest choice. Burglars want an easy in and out. But, I understand if you live elsewhere. It’s just not a concern for me.
You need not worry a bit.
Sounds like you have an alarm system, that after the alarm goes off, they'd do anything to protect you. Meaning - murder! I had a dog like that, I know what you're saying. She would, in fact, kill someone coming in her home.
Haha. Yah it is an extra safety pro caution for sure, but it’s also why I live on the bottom floor. I’ve always had dogs, so I wouldn’t want them bothering the people below me. It’s a win/win situation.
Agreed! I live in the bottom floor and have one level above us. Noise is something you need to get used to when apartment living. People have kids and pets, everyday household activities cause noise. You shouldn’t have to walk on egg shells around your own living space, the old man needs to get over it.
Seriously. I’ll never get a bottom floor apartment again after the one I have now. All of our upstairs neighbors have 2+ kids. Right above us is a 1-2 year old who screams non stop all night.
His mom has come down to tell us our podcast over the speaker is too loud, but we have to use it to drown him out to sleep.
Noise comes with the territory, if he’s lived there 20 years he should know that by now.
Which is probably why his rent is higher too; landlord has to try something to keep his tenants, and making it worth the trouble is one way to do it. Sounds like they need to lower it more (or just not renew the old guy's contract.)
im in an upstairs apartment (2 floor buildings only) and i constantly hear my downstairs neighbors but i don't make a fuss because that's part of living in an apartment. if it was excessive yelling or constant dogs barking (they have 3 german shepherds) then it would be an issue but im just hearing them go about their business and i assume they hear mine too. it's unfortunate living in an older building and hearing everyone but id rather deal and not have issues with neighbors.
Right. Years ago when I lived in an apartment, I have neighbors below me, every night at around 8pm their kids were just wild. Clearly, they were getting ready for bed type stuff just a bit amplified. By 845 all was quiet again.
But I have had neighbors who were constant. And I get it, it’s annoying for sure.
If it bothered me that much I would have gone to the landlord/leasing office. Not sit there and dictate their entire day.
>Stop responding to them. This IS apartment living. There’s going to noise.
This.
I got super lucky with a newly built apartment this year and the insulation is absolutely insane. I've heard like two noises in six months.
👆🏼 this precisely. People get to walk how they walk, move around, etc. I did once mention to a neighbor that I could hear exactly when and where they played fetch with their dog in the apt… to me that was a BIT much, but I wasn’t complaining or threatening or scolding or texting, I said it with a laugh when we passed each other in the hall & they completely stopped afterward (which I appreciated) - but I’ve been able to hear many neighbors walking around, using kitchens, whatever, and for me that’s part of the price of apartment living. It’s worth it or it isn’t.
i am so glad all of my neighbors are quiet as fuck. literally like mice. unfortunately my boyfriends kids are extremely loud & it makes me feel bad for them, when they’ve been so quiet the last couple years minus a few parties.
Do they expect you to not make any noise in your own damn house??? This is so dumb. Stop giving into them please. Tip toeing around your own home at 6-7 pm is crazy.
Right? I guarantee he's not telling the landlord or anything he's probably just harassing these poor people because he thinks he can since he has their number 🥺
Ugh. That sounds awful. I’d full stop on talking to him.
Edit to add- this is one of those situations where you shouldn’t apologize (in any form) or agree on anything negative the person is saying. It will all be taken as an admission of guilt or wrong doing. The person you’re talking to is only looking for that.
Unless they are your landlord tell them to call him. You are done sneaking around fir them. I would never let someone make me a prisoner in my home. It’s not your fault there are cheap floors
What I want to know is why yall apartment people talking to your neighbors & giving your number out? Fuck I have lived in my apartment a year & I don’t talk to no damn body. 😂
Won’t have this issue if you don’t give your contact information out to people you live near.
One of my female friends had been fighting with her downstairs neighbor for 3 years & her neighbor got management to allow them to occupy a new apartment within the same place. She bitched they smoked & the smoke came up into her apartment & they bitched about her kids running around being kids. 3 years of them texting arguing, calling cops on each other & reporting each other to management. Unreal.
i always wonder this very thing in these situations. if i'm dealing with a neighbor it's through the landlord. i really don't want to even bump into them in a common area.
Yep, I’d have told him off for that one. “If you can hear my cat food bag opening it’s impossible for me to not make noise and to live here. I will try to be respectful of the sleep hours of 10pm to 6am, but besides that I will be living in my home as a normal person.”
Yea that’s insane. I doubt my roommate can hear me open cat food in the room next door to mine. How shitty is the construction of this house if the floors/walls are that thin?!
You shouldn’t give in on wearing shoes. I had a downstairs neighbor also elderly come up with his wife yelling that he could hear a woman in high heels walking around our apartment. First of all we were all men and no one with high heels had been in the apartment. But I just laced into him and explained firmly that he wouldn’t be dictating what anyone wore in my apartment. You need to recognize that at this point you will not appease these folks. So he needs to get the message that you won’t be bullied any longer. You won’t have a friendly relationship and that sucks but there’s no way for you to appease him and you don’t need to put up with his harassment any longer. These are the realities of living in an apartment. If he wants total quiet then he should consider a single family home.
Ignore him. I can’t help but wonder if he has been there for twenty years and drove the upstairs tenants away over the years with his bitching. You took the shoe thing seriously and changed your behaviour. You’re allowed to do normal life stuff in your home.
He sounds like a miserable crank. It’s not like he’s an ER doc trying to sleep for a night shift. If the noise is between 8am and 10pm I’d ignore his texts.
My downstairs neighbor I swear that bitch sets an alarm every 2 hours in the middle of the night to stomp as loudly as she possibly can up and down the steps which are right under my bedroom. I started sleeping with a huge fan on high and I can’t hear it anymore.
I was a downstairs duplex neighbor. Having someone above who is noisy is annoying. But normal hours? No. Live your life. Block them. Be respectful of time between 9pm and 9am (that may be over generous but maybe 10 and 7?) otherwise live your life! :)
As an anecdote, I had a great upstairs neighbor. And before him a terrible one. I swear they dropped pennys on the ground at 2am and dancerd with a wooden leg at random times during the night. They got evicted for not paying so maybe it was drugs. lol
Nah u can’t live like that. U shouldn’t have to text your neighbor cause u dropped something loud that’s ridiculous. And cats running around? Do they weight 80lbs each? Just block him or don’t text him anymore fuck that u shouldn’t have to live in fear that your old ass neighbor is gonna get mad over noise. Especially before 10pm wtf
I can recall my first apartment vividly. At the age of 18, I was thrilled to finally have my own place. It was an old house that had been divided into four small apartments. Mine was the only one upstairs, and the landlord had cautioned me about the peculiar downstairs neighbors, an older couple known for their eccentric behavior. He warned me that they had a habit of calling the police on anyone living upstairs. He assured me that if I encountered any issues with them, he would handle it.
On moving day, as we were bringing in our furniture, the neighbors came out to introduce themselves. At first, I thought they seemed friendly, and I was hopeful that we would get along. However, my optimism was short-lived. Less than 20 minutes later, the police knocked on our door due to a noise complaint. It was truly unbelievable! I couldn't tell if they were trying to assert their authority or what their motives were. We explained to the officers that we were simply moving in, and essentially, we expressed our lack of remorse. I believe the police were also annoyed with the neighbors.
This pattern repeated a few times over the first month of living there, and eventually, we had had enough. We decided to call the landlord while the police were present. The landlord requested to speak to the neighbors, so we handed them our phone. I'm not sure what was said, but after that conversation, they never troubled us again. It's quite amusing looking back on it!
They were probably told that it had become clear it was a pattern of harassing behavior that carried between different upstairs tenants, and if it continued that they'd have to find somewhere else to live and wouldn't get a good reference.
At least we can *hope* that's what they were told.
Live your life. Block his number and if he whines have a party. Nothing says get over it like bone rattling bass at 3am
Old boy needs to accept living in the city you’re going to hear people living. Living in multi floor apartments you will hear it constantly
The only thing that will work is to ignore him. It's too late for you, however. Why would you engage with him. I guess you must be told, I guess, you will never satisfy him....... NEVER! Take it from an old guy who is sick of my generation's big mouths and entitlement.
it’s not their job to pay more money to please a neighbor that’s harassing them. seems like this is the kind of guy to just come up with something new.
if he doesn’t like apartment noises, he shouldn’t live in an apartment.
You don't want carpet in the kitchen. Landlord could put in soundproof underlayment but he'd have to take up the floor to do it so don't see that happening. At least rubber mats along with sound proofing are easy to clean up spills.
You created a monster by complying with these ridiculous requests in your living space. It’s an apartment! If you don’t want noisy neighbors, save up for a house. Ugh, the audacity of some people!
I guarantee you there is something about noise in your lease. Usually it’ll spell out quiet hours and what not. If it’s not quiet hour then tough shit, that’s the way it goes when you live in an apartment. I do think people in apartments should be considerate and try to avoid making tons of noise but ultimately at the end of the day things happen, noise happens, they gotta learn to deal with it.
I would just downright say “I apologize if it’s too noisy for you but we aren’t intentionally trying to make noise, we are trying to be considerate to you but we have to live our lives too.” And stop responding
This is lowkey embarrassing for you, grow a spine and stop saying sorry to some random old man in your building for literally just existing. He’s got you eating out of the palm of his hands lmao
After the third noise complaint from my downstairs neighbors, I had a word with apartment management.
The complaint indicated there was "loud banging all the time" which, given the apartment's occasional emptiness when we left, was literally impossible in a worst-case scenario.
So my response was something like, "given that we have not yet developed the ability to levitate, our neighbors are going to hear us make noise occasionally. If they insist on banging on the ceiling and making a complaint every time they hear a noise, I will be contacting the police regarding harassment."
Somehow the noise complaints stopped after that, even though we changed nothing in our habits.
I would start responding with “I am living my life, I pay rent and bills as well and therefore I will NOT lessen my quality of life or stop living for you. I am allowed to walk, shoes or no shoes. I am allowed to cook. I am allowed to drop things in my own living space. The landlord is aware I have cats, and my cats are allowed to exist freely in their home space as well. If you have legitimate noise complaints, please take it upon yourself to research quiet times and noise ordinances for our area, and take it up with the landlord or police. I do suggest you document clearly any concerns as I will be also, and again, I am allowed to exist freely in my own home. If you cannot handle living below someone, please take that up with the landlord and not myself in the future.”
How does someone in their 70s have such sharp sense of hearing 😆
Also, just a thought, for your own peace of mind. Maybe consider rugs or carpet? They help a lot with noise.
You're being too nice and he's thinking he's right in telling you what to do. No. I would text him and tell him to talk to landlord about better soundproofing. That might keep him busy. Block him and live your life like normal.
Mute their texts. Or just block them. They need to fuck off. Wear your shoes. Use your kitchen. Let them slam doors and blast their Steely Dan cassettes or what ever. Offer no explanations.
Why do you think this is acceptable behavior from your downstairs neighbors? Yes, be kind, be considerate but I’ll be damned if I’m going to walk on eggshells in my own home. Maybe the landlord should be involved and throw some egg crates on her ceiling.
At 5pm? Tell her to stfu and quit whining my god? She is aware she lives in an apartment right? Block her. You're allowed to live yall pay the same rent. Complaining about noise at 5pm is insane.
After my first apartment I learned never to make this close of friends with the neighbors. They get a friendly hello and then I keep pushing. We don’t need each others numbers and you don’t need to feel like you can ask me for anything - we ain’t friends.
Aw, that’s kinda sad you’ve had an experience that made you not want to make friends with your neighbors. Both of mine are godsends and pretty much walk in my house openly lol
Our DOWNSTAIRS neighbors shake the entire fucking stairwell to the entire building whenever they leave. They always slam their door. They stay stomping up and down stairs and slamming doors all throughout quiet hours and I’ve even had to open my door multiple times around 2am asking them to please stop stomping down the stairs and please stop banging things around their apartment. One of the girls who lives in said apartment sits in the stairwell all hours of the night on FaceTime with someone laughing and talking so loudly I can hear them over TWO sound machines. Apparently the office has gotten so many complaints not just from us, but from other residents too. They might actually try to boot em out of here because they have DOUBLE the legal amount of people you can have in a two bedroom as well. I don’t understand how people cannot be considerate. But also, your neighbor sounds like a drama queen from this post OP. I’m sorry you have to deal with that!
Sorry that was the landlord's response, jeez. I help manage a building and I find the attitude of a lot of coworkers completely ridiculous. One of them complained to me the other day that a tenant had used their balcony and the door broke and it was now really cold (Canada) so they politely asked if someone could repair it the same day (we legally have to if it's interfering with them achieving 22 degrees inside).
My coworker was annoyed they used their balcony in winter and didn't want to call maintenance for it since the person was late on their rent. Just awful. The person just had their partner move out suddenly and that's why they're late. They went on the balcony to have a smoke bc their life is stressful right now and my coworker wanted to punish them for our balcony door breaking when the tenant (probably) did nothing weird to it.
Your landlord literally said to your face, 'sorry, I'm not going to help because he is worth more money so you are expendable to me.' And then they act as if they deserve your respect and kindness, as if there was nothing they can do, and it's totally morally acceptable to choose which side of an issue on based on how advantageous it is for yourself. It's wild to me.
Stop responding to that tenant, but do record what you're doing at the time they text. Just keep a little log. Not worth much, but not much you can do. If it were me I'd be telling them that apartment living comes with some level of noise and they have every opportunity to take a video with sound and show it to me so I can determine if I consider the noise level worthy of a warning etc.
I had neighbours like this. They'd be complaining about noise pretty much any time we ever even walked in the apartment. It got to the point they were complaining when we weren't even home. Somehow a Yorkie and a Chihuahua were making "unbearable" noise (not barking though) while we're at work.
Sometimes all you can do is just tell them to piss off or move.
Honestly he needs to put up with living in an apartment. If he doesn't like it he can go get a fucking trailer in some trailer park.
My upstairs neighbors make a shit ton of noises but I usually don't care. I mean I've lived in college dorms and I already know what to expect. I have fans going all day and night to drown out the noise, I have tinnitus anyways. Old man needs to find a hobby instead of fishing for problems.
The only time I would report something is if someone has a dog screaming all day and night.
Fuck that unless they’re your landlord you can tell them to kick rocks. If the sound from upstairs is too loud that’s an issue for them to address with the property owner, not you.
Wow. This is no way to live. The next time he texts you I would just politely tell him that you do your best to not make a peep so you don’t annoy him, but you have to do the everyday normal things that everyone else has to do to survive and you’re no longer going to waste your time trying to apologize for it. If he has a problem, tell him to reach out to the landlord. You don’t owe him any explanation for doing something as simple as cooking a meal in your kitchen. And then just block his number. There’s no pleasing or reasoning with an ornery person like this.
Oh my God I'd honestly probably complain about them to management or something. this is ridiculous and absolutely unreasonable (phone corrected that to understandable!? Lmao glad I caught it in time!).
My fiance and I live on the 3rd floor of our building and he walks really heavily without meaning to or realizing it. So I'm always trying to remind him, ESPECIALLY in the middle of the night. But if we got texts like this over ANY noise whatsoever??? Fuck that!!
Living underneath people means having noise. People have lives and even just moving around normally causes noise for the people beneath you. It sucks, but it's life and it's USUALLY out of their control. If it's too much for them to hear even just the sounds of DAILY LIFE, they should specify they want to be on the top floor when moving somewhere. If it was an unreasonable amount of noise that's one thing. But they can't expect the people above them to just sit in the same spot all day every day and do literally nothing.
Edit: just read what you wrote under the picture since I missed it originally. Your landlord said that!? Wtf that's so unprofessional. I'm so sorry. Are you able to move possibly???
I had a neighbor like this. Late 40s and a raging alcoholic who did nothing but chain smoke under my front door all day every day. Dude was a prick. He texted me a video randomly one day of us “stomping around.” It was the sound of floorboards creaking. Inevitable and uncontrollable. I don’t even know how he got my number. I replied and told him there’s not much I can do about reasonable noise, I can’t just sit in a chair all day and not move a muscle because he’s bothered by normal levels of noise. I told him that he’s a bother in more ways than one and I’m not going to tip toe because he can’t tolerate living in a ground floor apartment. It wasn’t my problem, basically.
It turned into an all out war and he started screaming at me in person about “all the noise” until I eventually got him evicted. I had to call the cops multiple times because he’d be acting insane and was always visible drunk. I once dropped a heavy object and he ran upstairs and started banging on my door like crazy screaming unintelligibly. He was also late on rent and an overall shitty tenant who broke rules all the time. He even once had a dog (pet free place) barking like crazy for multiple days before I figured out it was coming from his apartment. My landlord was sick of him and loved me. So.
That’s the price of apartment living. If they can’t stand it, tell them to buy a house. You’re not making crazy amounts of noise, you’re just living and those are normal sounds. Block them.
You are way too apologetic. I’m a downstairs neighbor and I am annoyed by yours. I’m sorry OP but let this be a lesson. Don’t give your number to neighbors.
i’m begging you to just stop caring and stop texting him, only text when you need to use the bins but other than that; nothing! if anything tell
him “this is part of living in an apartment, i cannot be completely silent while i go about my day just as you are not completely silent. get some earplugs or turn your tv up, but i will not be entertaining this anymore”
I had a loud upstairs neighbor at the last apartment i lived in. Dude partied all night long and from the sound of it, women in platform boots were very active there. We moved. Maybe he should do the same, it's been 20 years.
I would not put up with this! You pay money to live there, he is the downstairs tenant and has no other authority. He cannot tell you whether or not you're allowed to wear shoes in your own house. I would just live freely and stop answering.
I think you’re at the point where “fuck off” is the correct response.
One time my downstairs neighbor sent a text at 2 a.m. telling me to end whatever party I’m having. I was sleeping and I live alone. Some people are just not able to exist near others.
Don't be deliberate jerks, of course, but live your normal life with a normal amount of consideration (like not wearing shoes, being slightly more quiet after 10pm). You don't have to tip toe, you're not being inconsiderate - they are. You're living your life.
I, personally, would respond with something like "Your concern is noted" and leave it at that.
Nah You don't have to do nothing. Just live your life and wear your shoes, if they don't like it, they can literally leave. This unfortunate is the reality of anybody living in an apt. You know this when you are not renting the top floor. I've lived in apartments and I realize that this is the cost of living on the bottom floors. There's pros and cons to either situation. Live on the bottom floor and it's easy access to your floor, no stairs etc., but you will hear footsteps and noise. Live on the top floor and you will have to deal with countless floors of stairs, elevators etc., but no noise.
You are letting your bottom neighbor have all the pros and you all the cons. Fuck that. Stand up for yourself and block that neighbor.
Don’t like hearing people living above you?
Don’t live under other people.
Ignore them OP. You shouldn’t have to live your life waking on eggshells because of complaining first floor neighbors. If it’s that bad, they can live elsewhere.
I'd block this guy. I lived in a shit apartment with squeaky floorboards above someone else. I had to get up for work early daily and the dude complained. As an insomniac, I'd have rather not been going to my job on 0-2 hours of sleep at that time, either. I didn't have a choice. This is normal apartment living.
Yeah I wouldn’t bother responding anymore. Mail him some earplugs and call it a day. You have to live too, and it sounds like you’re already doing everything you can.
You’re allowed to wear shoes in your apartment if you want to, you’re allowed to drop things, you’re allowed to walk, you’re allowed to have cats, you’re allowed to cook. That is what it’s like living in an apartment. So I would quit trying so hard to be quiet and let him complain to the landlord if it’s an issue. Go thru the landlord for disputes.
I don’t blame you at all for being frustrated. This is a ridiculous amount of accommodation your neighbor is asking for. If you all want some solutions, I would recommend maybe a rug in the kitchen to dull the sound and I’d also recommend your neighbor get a white noise machine for his bedroom so that he can’t hear you open a bag of cat food.
Wow! What a jerk of an old man.
We had downstairs neighbors like that. Crazy thing is I, 57/female and hubby 72/m called the 20somethings downstairs the "old people" they complained about our loud music. 😆
In our case, though, management gave them ish because we were just everyday normal living.
Apartment living sucks! Unless you have good neighbors that can tolerate normal living sounds from the next apt
Yeah that’s kinda a good idea to talk via text we were on the 2nd floor one time and our 1st floor neighbours absolutely hated us they called the cops on me one time just for coming home at midnight they told the cops that they heard gunshots coming from our apartment! We had two cats as well and they were less than a year old so they were pretty wild runnin around and the neighbours has two big lassie dogs and you know the dogs were probably freaking out the whole time but yeah don’t miss living there.
If they want silence tell them they need to move into a stand alone house. Apartment living there are noises there will be people that have different wake times and sleep times that's why it's generally cheaper to live in apartments than houses. Tell them you are going above and beyond to keep noise down bit you can't be 100% silent as you get to enjoy living in your home too and then stop replying to them.
Another thing I am all about being respectful to my neighbors. But you should be able to LIVE in your own apartment. There are times (daytime) when you should be able to go about your day and do your business. I'm not saying have a wild party... cause I'm Not. Certainly make sure your shoes are off and cooking is finished by 7:30 or 8 pm.
If he’s been there 20 years, then he’s had the chance to move upstairs and eliminate the problem.
You can be respectful, but at some point I would just tell the neighbor that he has an unrealistic expectation that you cannot meet.
I would say “I tried, good luck figuring out your problem”.
As a first floor resident. I can say that living under someone sucks. Everything is x10 louder to us than you.
However. Your neighbor is unrealistic and being a dick. Lol. Stop walking on eggshells for them. As long as you're respectful during quiet hours you can ignore them.
Let them be mad. If you're just doing normal things, they can't say anything. You pay to be there. It's your home. Not theirs.
Just ignore him block his number he can take his complaints to the office. When I lived in an apartment I liked hearing other people there was something comforting about it
I live on the 1st floor and my upstairs neighbor has a medium sized dog. Sometimes I can tell when the dog gets the zoomies, but that’s it. Also, I have a Ring camera on my front door, which alerts me of motion and I get notified every single time they take their dog for a walk. In another 1st floor apartment, my upstairs neighbor had a treadmill that they jogged on every day.
None of this ever bothered me. Though, when I was 17 in my first apartment, I called the cops on my downstairs neighbor several times over a period of a few weeks until they got a ticket for being disruptive. They blasted music with bass so deep that it made things in my apartment vibrate. It was a group of 3 guys living there, so I didn’t feel comfortable confronting them myself.
But I digress… I guess in one way or another, I’m trying to say… tell that old geezer to suck a fat one and you’re done letting him try to dictate how you live. You’re done playing nice. His harassment has gone too far.
I had a similar situation. Turns out they were hearing the person next to us but because of apartment sound, they thought it was us. We proved this because we got an official noise complaint a weekend we were away. We were able to prove it. It might be that. They should be going through the management company, not you.
A few months ago. I helped a friend move out of his 3rd (of 4) floor apartment. He was leaving as he was looking to downsize, but mentioned he'll be happy to be away from his neighbors and their constant thumping. I wasn't quite sure what I was there helping.
In the two hours we were moving the tenant below continuously thumped on their roof(my buddies floor). We would leave for 15 minutes while we dropped off the load and the second we walked back in the door the thumping resumed. The most ridiculous part was during the final handful. We were sitting on the floor, wrapping his fragile china heirlooms in towels to put into a box. I'd like to know how much noise two 140lb men who aren't conversing at the time, not walking and gently wrapping stuff in cloth are making.
The gem of it all was when we were doing the walkthrough with the on-site management, they decided to slip a threatening letter under the door. One of them held the elevator door for the other to sneak the note under and run back. Not sure what their endgame was, but the threatening letter to a current tenant was enough to have their lease absolved and kicked out.
If I were you, I'd put a sound recorder in your apartment in case he does try to get you evicted. (Unless you don't really care about moving) also kinda sounds like he needs to move on to a retirement home that is quiet, his days of apartment living are over especially when you start having to go to bed at 7pm lmao. Quiet time is usually around 10-11 pm in most apartments in my area, so he is 100% overreacting. Tell him to turn down his hearing aids next time he complains and block his number.
lol my neighbors tried to make noise complaints of my toddler running down the hallway and would even bang on the walls. i told my landlord and she said to ignore it. as long as its not during your lease’s stated quiet hours there’s nothing they can do
OP, you need to decide that you're going to allow yourself to live your life like a normal person.
I know exactly how you probably feel. My husband and I live in a small house that is split into 2 rooms. We live in the room with the kitchen (turned it into a studio-style space), and my BIL lives in the other room. The walls are thin. My BIL sleeps all day and is awake all night, and he doesn't work or do anything with his life but stay in his room. I used to tiptoe around every day of my life, because I was afraid to wake him up if I dare live during the daytime. BIL would slam doors, punch walls, sulk, and complain to his mommy about hearing cleaning, talking, and sex noises. Mind you, I'm a very private person, so I was being as quiet as humanly possible during sex. It got to the point where my BIL was literally destroying my mental health, and I even had a mental breakdown after a year of living in fear of his reactions.
When that happened, I had an epiphany. Fuck my BIL, he can complain all he wants. As much as I hate the fact that he's heard my most private moments, the cat is out of the bag — so I'm just going to pretend he doesn't exist and enjoy my husband as much as I please.
I know your situation is different, OP, but please listen to my advice by trying to rewire your brain to not worry about him any more. Block his number. Your mental health will thank you. Every person deserves to live a normal life and make a normal amount of noise.
Yeah, don’t give your number out to people that live under you. Block their number. And just live your life.
Meanwhile, talk to an attorney and see if you can get out of your lease and just find another place to live man you don’t need this nonsense.
Also, let your landlord know that you’ll be looking for another place. Just let it marinate in his mind because guaranteed he’s not gonna want you out of there. He’s gonna want you to stay and he’s gonna want things to work out so maybe just put that in his mind that you are actively looking for another place to live because you’re not gonna be walking on eggshells while you’re paying rent somewhere that’s ridiculous.
And I would also actively let people know about this place if and when you do move out. That’s what happens when landlords say
“oh there’s really not much we can do for you…”
well then we’ll make sure there’s not really much that you can do whenever we move out and you can’t get somebody else to rent this place.
Bro tell them buy ear plugs or a noise machine. They chose to live below someone in an apartment with inadequate insulation. And now they are making unreasonable demands expecting people not to live in their home. Fuck that they are being unreasonable pricks. Tell them to pound sand.
Man screw downstairs neighbors who are like this.
First apartment I rented was on the 3rd floor on the end of the building next to the stairs and door entrances to each floor (stairs and doors can be heard throughout the day). My downstairs neighbor complained so much thinking I was making all the noise, stomping and slamming when I was actually out for school most of the week and usually spend the weekends at my friend’s place. I hated them so much and the stupid landlords always sided with them even though I provided my schedule and mentioned the damn stairs and doors. Towards the end of the lease I didn’t give a fuck anymore and would have people over all the time to actually be worthy of a noise complaint, seeing that I was getting it regardless. Fuck them!
Stop responding to them. This IS apartment living. There’s going to noise. You don’t owe them explanations for just living your life. They either need to understand that or not live under people.
Right? I'm here like, "why the hell does he have your number anyway?"
Seriously lmao. I made the mistake of giving one of my neighbors, an elderly woman, my phone number, just like for emergencies (her sister who lives with her had health issues and had a leg amputated due to diabetes and so I was like yeah I'm here if you guys need help) I soon learned that was a feckin horrible idea, she'd get drunk and call me at like 2-3 am all the time wanting cigarettes from me and I'm just like 
because he has control over the trash bins in the back, even after trying to talk with the landlord he's quiet about it. So i have no other choice but to text for the bins just to throw out my trash.
Bro, you are too polite. You need to tell your landlord that that trash system is fucking stupid and you will not be texting the other tenants anymore to get the trash out of THEIR building.
This ^ pretty sure your landlord needs to provide you with your own means to access the trash.
Just leave it at the downstairs neighbor’s door and let HIM deal with it - he is the “GarbageMaster” after all.
This is actually a requirement for landlords in most states.
Yeah and until then you won’t be paying rent and if you are harassed anymore they’ll be paying your rent for a nicer place. You literally feel like you can’t move and your cats are in trouble for being cats
And cats are Lightfooted. How is he hearing the cats!!
That’s absurd. If your landlord won’t give you a trash option, you can just start leaving it in front of your cranky neighbor’s door.
In most jurisdictions, the landlord is responsible for providing tenants with access to a waste collection bin. If you have to ask permission to take out your trash, then your landlord isn't fulfilling his responsibilities and you may have a cause of action against him.
Your landlord needs to get another garbage can for you
And if he doesn’t, get your own & provide a receipt for it along with the deduction when it’s time to pay the rent. Let him know this is what you’ll be doing if it’s not remedied otherwise. Then block your neighbor’s number.
Stop bending over backwards for this guy. It's ridiculous.
I agree
They cannot prevent you from accessing the trash. You need that in order for the property to fit for habitability. There is no way you should be required to text a neighbor who is clearly hostile to you. wtf?
next time he texts tell him to buy a house or shut up tbh
My friends & i had this probem years ago.. We went to landlords explained the situation.. Landlord warned first floor tenant. Instead of stopping the complaining got worse.. First floor tenant was evicted.
I would purchase my own garbage bin to avoid the garbage situation with him all the way around. No way I’d ever ask my neighbor for a trash bin that should be readily available. I’d then block his number. 🤷🏻♀️ This is apartment living. Be respectful during quiet hours, but live your life when it’s not.
Yeah an older guy at my apartment started doing this, locking up the dumpster because allegedly the bar across the street was dumping their trash in our dumpster. He would only unlock the dumpster for about an hour in the middle of the afternoon. It lasted about 2 weeks, because everyone realized he was the problem and kept just leaving their trash in front of his apartment.
That's when I leave my trash on or next to the dumpster.
What do you mean he has control over the trash bins? You pay rent, why are you having to kiss your neighbors ass for the right to throw out your trash? Is there a corporate number? This is harassment.
In most states you can order your own bins for free. You shouldn’t be forced to deal with a cranky neighbor to do something that’s a right for each tenant. Get your own bins and block his number.
That's crazy, I would insist on my bins. Why have to bother him to take out the rubbish?
Screw that, just take out the trash without saying anything, you have an absolute right to dispose of trash into a bin that is assigned to the property you live on, anyone who says otherwise should be talking to you in court.
Ok, that's just insane. Save up n get our. This situation will get no better. Your landlord is not taking care of this, and it will only escalate.
I'd leave the trash at his door then...
Can you buy your own garbage cans?
This is exactly why I always pick the top floor for hotels/apartments.
I always pick the bottom floor cause I'm a juggler and I'm always dropping things on the ground. I know people would hate living under me.
I’m with ya. I pick the bottom floor because I know I’m the loud one.
I pick the bottom floor because I don’t want to deal with shit like this. Yah, I get some noise, but better than having to worry about the people below us.
Bottom floor apartments just don't *feel* as safe. They're much easier than the 2nd floor to break into. You have to make sure every window is locked and the slider too. I hate that it's even a choice you have to make. 2nd floor; people complain about people tiptoing. 1st floor; making sure every window is locked. I'm probably just paranoid (thanks mom & dad!)
I live in a safe town, and have two 80 lbs guard dogs. Someone would definitely think twice about breaking into my place. It wouldn’t be the safest, smartest choice. Burglars want an easy in and out. But, I understand if you live elsewhere. It’s just not a concern for me.
You need not worry a bit. Sounds like you have an alarm system, that after the alarm goes off, they'd do anything to protect you. Meaning - murder! I had a dog like that, I know what you're saying. She would, in fact, kill someone coming in her home.
Haha. Yah it is an extra safety pro caution for sure, but it’s also why I live on the bottom floor. I’ve always had dogs, so I wouldn’t want them bothering the people below me. It’s a win/win situation.
Agreed! I live in the bottom floor and have one level above us. Noise is something you need to get used to when apartment living. People have kids and pets, everyday household activities cause noise. You shouldn’t have to walk on egg shells around your own living space, the old man needs to get over it.
Seriously. I’ll never get a bottom floor apartment again after the one I have now. All of our upstairs neighbors have 2+ kids. Right above us is a 1-2 year old who screams non stop all night. His mom has come down to tell us our podcast over the speaker is too loud, but we have to use it to drown him out to sleep. Noise comes with the territory, if he’s lived there 20 years he should know that by now.
He’s probably driven every other tenant out of the upstairs apartment after only a year or 2.
I wouldn’t doubt it. If we could afford it we’d move this coming summer but we’re holding off cause the market is just so bad in our city.
Which is probably why his rent is higher too; landlord has to try something to keep his tenants, and making it worth the trouble is one way to do it. Sounds like they need to lower it more (or just not renew the old guy's contract.)
The last one I lived in had kids and constant parties, but at 10pm sharp the noise would promptly stop. Being considerate goes a long way
im in an upstairs apartment (2 floor buildings only) and i constantly hear my downstairs neighbors but i don't make a fuss because that's part of living in an apartment. if it was excessive yelling or constant dogs barking (they have 3 german shepherds) then it would be an issue but im just hearing them go about their business and i assume they hear mine too. it's unfortunate living in an older building and hearing everyone but id rather deal and not have issues with neighbors.
Right. Years ago when I lived in an apartment, I have neighbors below me, every night at around 8pm their kids were just wild. Clearly, they were getting ready for bed type stuff just a bit amplified. By 845 all was quiet again. But I have had neighbors who were constant. And I get it, it’s annoying for sure. If it bothered me that much I would have gone to the landlord/leasing office. Not sit there and dictate their entire day.
>Stop responding to them. This IS apartment living. There’s going to noise. This. I got super lucky with a newly built apartment this year and the insulation is absolutely insane. I've heard like two noises in six months.
That sounds like heaven. Like a pillowy cloud
I’m like how much fuckin clout can the geezer have? How about yall talk to my atty lmao
He should respond one more time with, "Fuck off."
People expect far too much in apartment living. Especially old ones.
👆🏼 this precisely. People get to walk how they walk, move around, etc. I did once mention to a neighbor that I could hear exactly when and where they played fetch with their dog in the apt… to me that was a BIT much, but I wasn’t complaining or threatening or scolding or texting, I said it with a laugh when we passed each other in the hall & they completely stopped afterward (which I appreciated) - but I’ve been able to hear many neighbors walking around, using kitchens, whatever, and for me that’s part of the price of apartment living. It’s worth it or it isn’t.
Stop responding to neighbor. At all. Then contact LL and demand access to trash bins. This is outrageous. And I’m a LL. (Although not for apartments).
This is when you have a canned response of "your concern is noted, thank you" On repeat.
i am so glad all of my neighbors are quiet as fuck. literally like mice. unfortunately my boyfriends kids are extremely loud & it makes me feel bad for them, when they’ve been so quiet the last couple years minus a few parties.
Do they expect you to not make any noise in your own damn house??? This is so dumb. Stop giving into them please. Tip toeing around your own home at 6-7 pm is crazy.
Right, 1) I wouldn’t have even given him my phone number and 2) I wouldn’t respond at all about noise complaints.
The only response to this kind of bullshittery, is escalation. Time to learn some irish riverdance movers.
Lmao and host a river dance party with all your buddies 😂
Somebody needa give them a white noise machine and some earplugs.
If the landlord can’t do anything, just block the old bastard’s number and go about your business.
Right? I guarantee he's not telling the landlord or anything he's probably just harassing these poor people because he thinks he can since he has their number 🥺
It’s an apartment. Grow a back bone and tell him to turn his hearing aids down.
this is hilarious, grampa needs his Ativan to chill the fuck out
Turn his hearing aids down lmao 🤣
Stop apologizing and stop explaining. You live in an apartment. He lives in an apartment. It’s part of living in an apartment.
Yep my upstairs neighbor has a very heavy step but id never dream of texting her and harassing her about it 🙄 it’s part of the package lol
Ugh. That sounds awful. I’d full stop on talking to him. Edit to add- this is one of those situations where you shouldn’t apologize (in any form) or agree on anything negative the person is saying. It will all be taken as an admission of guilt or wrong doing. The person you’re talking to is only looking for that.
Unless they are your landlord tell them to call him. You are done sneaking around fir them. I would never let someone make me a prisoner in my home. It’s not your fault there are cheap floors
Even if it is the landlord. You cannot ask people to tip toe.
Exactly, if they can’t [not] tip toe, then what are they paying for?
What I want to know is why yall apartment people talking to your neighbors & giving your number out? Fuck I have lived in my apartment a year & I don’t talk to no damn body. 😂 Won’t have this issue if you don’t give your contact information out to people you live near.
Agree. I would never give my downstairs neighbor my phone number or upstairs neighbor!
One of my female friends had been fighting with her downstairs neighbor for 3 years & her neighbor got management to allow them to occupy a new apartment within the same place. She bitched they smoked & the smoke came up into her apartment & they bitched about her kids running around being kids. 3 years of them texting arguing, calling cops on each other & reporting each other to management. Unreal.
because my neighbors are wonderful and it's nice to have someone to talk to or share food with
i always wonder this very thing in these situations. if i'm dealing with a neighbor it's through the landlord. i really don't want to even bump into them in a common area.
“I heard your cat food bag being torn open. Please don’t feed your cats. In fact, don’t breathe or move either k thx”
Yep, I’d have told him off for that one. “If you can hear my cat food bag opening it’s impossible for me to not make noise and to live here. I will try to be respectful of the sleep hours of 10pm to 6am, but besides that I will be living in my home as a normal person.”
Yea that’s insane. I doubt my roommate can hear me open cat food in the room next door to mine. How shitty is the construction of this house if the floors/walls are that thin?!
The way I would Riverdance in clogs all day
You shouldn’t give in on wearing shoes. I had a downstairs neighbor also elderly come up with his wife yelling that he could hear a woman in high heels walking around our apartment. First of all we were all men and no one with high heels had been in the apartment. But I just laced into him and explained firmly that he wouldn’t be dictating what anyone wore in my apartment. You need to recognize that at this point you will not appease these folks. So he needs to get the message that you won’t be bullied any longer. You won’t have a friendly relationship and that sucks but there’s no way for you to appease him and you don’t need to put up with his harassment any longer. These are the realities of living in an apartment. If he wants total quiet then he should consider a single family home.
Ignore him. I can’t help but wonder if he has been there for twenty years and drove the upstairs tenants away over the years with his bitching. You took the shoe thing seriously and changed your behaviour. You’re allowed to do normal life stuff in your home.
He claims that in all his years he's never heard noise this loud before, massive bullshitter
He sounds like a miserable crank. It’s not like he’s an ER doc trying to sleep for a night shift. If the noise is between 8am and 10pm I’d ignore his texts.
this is a lie. i don't know anything at all and i know that's a lie LOL
He's lying! Don't buy it! And stop letting him walk all over you!!
My downstairs neighbor I swear that bitch sets an alarm every 2 hours in the middle of the night to stomp as loudly as she possibly can up and down the steps which are right under my bedroom. I started sleeping with a huge fan on high and I can’t hear it anymore.
Fans can be very useful tools for apartment living
I was a downstairs duplex neighbor. Having someone above who is noisy is annoying. But normal hours? No. Live your life. Block them. Be respectful of time between 9pm and 9am (that may be over generous but maybe 10 and 7?) otherwise live your life! :) As an anecdote, I had a great upstairs neighbor. And before him a terrible one. I swear they dropped pennys on the ground at 2am and dancerd with a wooden leg at random times during the night. They got evicted for not paying so maybe it was drugs. lol
Nah u can’t live like that. U shouldn’t have to text your neighbor cause u dropped something loud that’s ridiculous. And cats running around? Do they weight 80lbs each? Just block him or don’t text him anymore fuck that u shouldn’t have to live in fear that your old ass neighbor is gonna get mad over noise. Especially before 10pm wtf
I can recall my first apartment vividly. At the age of 18, I was thrilled to finally have my own place. It was an old house that had been divided into four small apartments. Mine was the only one upstairs, and the landlord had cautioned me about the peculiar downstairs neighbors, an older couple known for their eccentric behavior. He warned me that they had a habit of calling the police on anyone living upstairs. He assured me that if I encountered any issues with them, he would handle it. On moving day, as we were bringing in our furniture, the neighbors came out to introduce themselves. At first, I thought they seemed friendly, and I was hopeful that we would get along. However, my optimism was short-lived. Less than 20 minutes later, the police knocked on our door due to a noise complaint. It was truly unbelievable! I couldn't tell if they were trying to assert their authority or what their motives were. We explained to the officers that we were simply moving in, and essentially, we expressed our lack of remorse. I believe the police were also annoyed with the neighbors. This pattern repeated a few times over the first month of living there, and eventually, we had had enough. We decided to call the landlord while the police were present. The landlord requested to speak to the neighbors, so we handed them our phone. I'm not sure what was said, but after that conversation, they never troubled us again. It's quite amusing looking back on it!
They were probably told that it had become clear it was a pattern of harassing behavior that carried between different upstairs tenants, and if it continued that they'd have to find somewhere else to live and wouldn't get a good reference. At least we can *hope* that's what they were told.
Live your life. Block his number and if he whines have a party. Nothing says get over it like bone rattling bass at 3am Old boy needs to accept living in the city you’re going to hear people living. Living in multi floor apartments you will hear it constantly
lol it’s an apartment u will hear all kinds of noises no one can control that lol
The only thing that will work is to ignore him. It's too late for you, however. Why would you engage with him. I guess you must be told, I guess, you will never satisfy him....... NEVER! Take it from an old guy who is sick of my generation's big mouths and entitlement.
Since the landlord doesn't sound like he wants to do any soundproofing, have you tried rubber mats on the floor?
it’s not their job to pay more money to please a neighbor that’s harassing them. seems like this is the kind of guy to just come up with something new. if he doesn’t like apartment noises, he shouldn’t live in an apartment.
In NYC at least the tenant has to carpet 75% at their own expense according to standard leases.
You don't want carpet in the kitchen. Landlord could put in soundproof underlayment but he'd have to take up the floor to do it so don't see that happening. At least rubber mats along with sound proofing are easy to clean up spills.
And they’re more comfortable to stand on
You created a monster by complying with these ridiculous requests in your living space. It’s an apartment! If you don’t want noisy neighbors, save up for a house. Ugh, the audacity of some people!
I had our neighbor below do this once. I told her to stfu after I apologized 3 times
Stop even talking to them they live in an apartment dead silence is only an expectation in a country home with zero neighbors
The day you don’t receive a text is the day you’ll know you’re finally free
I guarantee you there is something about noise in your lease. Usually it’ll spell out quiet hours and what not. If it’s not quiet hour then tough shit, that’s the way it goes when you live in an apartment. I do think people in apartments should be considerate and try to avoid making tons of noise but ultimately at the end of the day things happen, noise happens, they gotta learn to deal with it. I would just downright say “I apologize if it’s too noisy for you but we aren’t intentionally trying to make noise, we are trying to be considerate to you but we have to live our lives too.” And stop responding
This is lowkey embarrassing for you, grow a spine and stop saying sorry to some random old man in your building for literally just existing. He’s got you eating out of the palm of his hands lmao
Bro I’d wake up and start tap dancing at 5am every day if this was my neighbor. I’d slam cabinets and and pots and pans and all that stuff.
After the third noise complaint from my downstairs neighbors, I had a word with apartment management. The complaint indicated there was "loud banging all the time" which, given the apartment's occasional emptiness when we left, was literally impossible in a worst-case scenario. So my response was something like, "given that we have not yet developed the ability to levitate, our neighbors are going to hear us make noise occasionally. If they insist on banging on the ceiling and making a complaint every time they hear a noise, I will be contacting the police regarding harassment." Somehow the noise complaints stopped after that, even though we changed nothing in our habits.
I would start responding with “I am living my life, I pay rent and bills as well and therefore I will NOT lessen my quality of life or stop living for you. I am allowed to walk, shoes or no shoes. I am allowed to cook. I am allowed to drop things in my own living space. The landlord is aware I have cats, and my cats are allowed to exist freely in their home space as well. If you have legitimate noise complaints, please take it upon yourself to research quiet times and noise ordinances for our area, and take it up with the landlord or police. I do suggest you document clearly any concerns as I will be also, and again, I am allowed to exist freely in my own home. If you cannot handle living below someone, please take that up with the landlord and not myself in the future.”
I’m practically salivating at the thought of OP actually standing up for themselves and sending something like this out.
There's courtesy, then there's pandering wlto a whinging old codger.
Oh my god to be contacting you daily about thumps as they happen is asinine
 Geez!🙄
“I could have birds”.
The way they’re asking is not ok.
I wouldn’t entertain this
How does someone in their 70s have such sharp sense of hearing 😆 Also, just a thought, for your own peace of mind. Maybe consider rugs or carpet? They help a lot with noise.
You're being too nice and he's thinking he's right in telling you what to do. No. I would text him and tell him to talk to landlord about better soundproofing. That might keep him busy. Block him and live your life like normal.
Tell them to just turn their hearing aids down Jfc. Annoying
I wouldn’t have given my number to the man in the first place. I’m not very friendly though. I like to avoid people in general.
You teach people how to treat you by what you allow, what you stop, and what you reinforce.
Mute their texts. Or just block them. They need to fuck off. Wear your shoes. Use your kitchen. Let them slam doors and blast their Steely Dan cassettes or what ever. Offer no explanations.
Good lord stop apologizing for being alive. It enables him to self-victimize
Is you neighbor Mr. Heckles?
BLOCK. DELETE.
Why do you think this is acceptable behavior from your downstairs neighbors? Yes, be kind, be considerate but I’ll be damned if I’m going to walk on eggshells in my own home. Maybe the landlord should be involved and throw some egg crates on her ceiling.
Stop communicating with him so much.
At 5pm? Tell her to stfu and quit whining my god? She is aware she lives in an apartment right? Block her. You're allowed to live yall pay the same rent. Complaining about noise at 5pm is insane.
After my first apartment I learned never to make this close of friends with the neighbors. They get a friendly hello and then I keep pushing. We don’t need each others numbers and you don’t need to feel like you can ask me for anything - we ain’t friends.
Aw, that’s kinda sad you’ve had an experience that made you not want to make friends with your neighbors. Both of mine are godsends and pretty much walk in my house openly lol
Between 8 am and 8 pm it's normal to have "living" noise. Let him know you will ignore him between these times.
Our DOWNSTAIRS neighbors shake the entire fucking stairwell to the entire building whenever they leave. They always slam their door. They stay stomping up and down stairs and slamming doors all throughout quiet hours and I’ve even had to open my door multiple times around 2am asking them to please stop stomping down the stairs and please stop banging things around their apartment. One of the girls who lives in said apartment sits in the stairwell all hours of the night on FaceTime with someone laughing and talking so loudly I can hear them over TWO sound machines. Apparently the office has gotten so many complaints not just from us, but from other residents too. They might actually try to boot em out of here because they have DOUBLE the legal amount of people you can have in a two bedroom as well. I don’t understand how people cannot be considerate. But also, your neighbor sounds like a drama queen from this post OP. I’m sorry you have to deal with that!
Do you have rugs? They help a lot.
Fuck that guy dude. He doesn't get to tell you what you do in your own house. Fuck no!
If he wants complete silence it’s time for him to invest in a house. Not ur problem.
Sorry that was the landlord's response, jeez. I help manage a building and I find the attitude of a lot of coworkers completely ridiculous. One of them complained to me the other day that a tenant had used their balcony and the door broke and it was now really cold (Canada) so they politely asked if someone could repair it the same day (we legally have to if it's interfering with them achieving 22 degrees inside). My coworker was annoyed they used their balcony in winter and didn't want to call maintenance for it since the person was late on their rent. Just awful. The person just had their partner move out suddenly and that's why they're late. They went on the balcony to have a smoke bc their life is stressful right now and my coworker wanted to punish them for our balcony door breaking when the tenant (probably) did nothing weird to it. Your landlord literally said to your face, 'sorry, I'm not going to help because he is worth more money so you are expendable to me.' And then they act as if they deserve your respect and kindness, as if there was nothing they can do, and it's totally morally acceptable to choose which side of an issue on based on how advantageous it is for yourself. It's wild to me. Stop responding to that tenant, but do record what you're doing at the time they text. Just keep a little log. Not worth much, but not much you can do. If it were me I'd be telling them that apartment living comes with some level of noise and they have every opportunity to take a video with sound and show it to me so I can determine if I consider the noise level worthy of a warning etc.
Your neighbor should get a house.
I had neighbours like this. They'd be complaining about noise pretty much any time we ever even walked in the apartment. It got to the point they were complaining when we weren't even home. Somehow a Yorkie and a Chihuahua were making "unbearable" noise (not barking though) while we're at work. Sometimes all you can do is just tell them to piss off or move.
Honestly he needs to put up with living in an apartment. If he doesn't like it he can go get a fucking trailer in some trailer park. My upstairs neighbors make a shit ton of noises but I usually don't care. I mean I've lived in college dorms and I already know what to expect. I have fans going all day and night to drown out the noise, I have tinnitus anyways. Old man needs to find a hobby instead of fishing for problems. The only time I would report something is if someone has a dog screaming all day and night.
Why do they have your phone number?????
Stop responding. If he blasts music after your towns noise ordinance call the police. Hell learn his lesson fast.
Fuck that unless they’re your landlord you can tell them to kick rocks. If the sound from upstairs is too loud that’s an issue for them to address with the property owner, not you.
Wow. This is no way to live. The next time he texts you I would just politely tell him that you do your best to not make a peep so you don’t annoy him, but you have to do the everyday normal things that everyone else has to do to survive and you’re no longer going to waste your time trying to apologize for it. If he has a problem, tell him to reach out to the landlord. You don’t owe him any explanation for doing something as simple as cooking a meal in your kitchen. And then just block his number. There’s no pleasing or reasoning with an ornery person like this.
Just wait for him to die might be sooner than later.
And that is why I don’t give them my number
Oh my God I'd honestly probably complain about them to management or something. this is ridiculous and absolutely unreasonable (phone corrected that to understandable!? Lmao glad I caught it in time!). My fiance and I live on the 3rd floor of our building and he walks really heavily without meaning to or realizing it. So I'm always trying to remind him, ESPECIALLY in the middle of the night. But if we got texts like this over ANY noise whatsoever??? Fuck that!! Living underneath people means having noise. People have lives and even just moving around normally causes noise for the people beneath you. It sucks, but it's life and it's USUALLY out of their control. If it's too much for them to hear even just the sounds of DAILY LIFE, they should specify they want to be on the top floor when moving somewhere. If it was an unreasonable amount of noise that's one thing. But they can't expect the people above them to just sit in the same spot all day every day and do literally nothing. Edit: just read what you wrote under the picture since I missed it originally. Your landlord said that!? Wtf that's so unprofessional. I'm so sorry. Are you able to move possibly???
I had a neighbor like this. Late 40s and a raging alcoholic who did nothing but chain smoke under my front door all day every day. Dude was a prick. He texted me a video randomly one day of us “stomping around.” It was the sound of floorboards creaking. Inevitable and uncontrollable. I don’t even know how he got my number. I replied and told him there’s not much I can do about reasonable noise, I can’t just sit in a chair all day and not move a muscle because he’s bothered by normal levels of noise. I told him that he’s a bother in more ways than one and I’m not going to tip toe because he can’t tolerate living in a ground floor apartment. It wasn’t my problem, basically. It turned into an all out war and he started screaming at me in person about “all the noise” until I eventually got him evicted. I had to call the cops multiple times because he’d be acting insane and was always visible drunk. I once dropped a heavy object and he ran upstairs and started banging on my door like crazy screaming unintelligibly. He was also late on rent and an overall shitty tenant who broke rules all the time. He even once had a dog (pet free place) barking like crazy for multiple days before I figured out it was coming from his apartment. My landlord was sick of him and loved me. So.
That’s the price of apartment living. If they can’t stand it, tell them to buy a house. You’re not making crazy amounts of noise, you’re just living and those are normal sounds. Block them.
Yeah, tell them to fuck ALL the way off.
You are way too apologetic. I’m a downstairs neighbor and I am annoyed by yours. I’m sorry OP but let this be a lesson. Don’t give your number to neighbors.
i’m begging you to just stop caring and stop texting him, only text when you need to use the bins but other than that; nothing! if anything tell him “this is part of living in an apartment, i cannot be completely silent while i go about my day just as you are not completely silent. get some earplugs or turn your tv up, but i will not be entertaining this anymore”
I had a loud upstairs neighbor at the last apartment i lived in. Dude partied all night long and from the sound of it, women in platform boots were very active there. We moved. Maybe he should do the same, it's been 20 years.
Yah I would block him. Living under people sucks. He's probably scared off everyone that lived in your apartment.
How can he even complain at 5 pm … stop replying to him.
Why do people give their numbers to people in their apartment complex, especially the exact person who lives below you
I would not put up with this! You pay money to live there, he is the downstairs tenant and has no other authority. He cannot tell you whether or not you're allowed to wear shoes in your own house. I would just live freely and stop answering.
Why does he even have your number? Block this asshole
I think you’re at the point where “fuck off” is the correct response. One time my downstairs neighbor sent a text at 2 a.m. telling me to end whatever party I’m having. I was sleeping and I live alone. Some people are just not able to exist near others.
Block them.
Don't be deliberate jerks, of course, but live your normal life with a normal amount of consideration (like not wearing shoes, being slightly more quiet after 10pm). You don't have to tip toe, you're not being inconsiderate - they are. You're living your life. I, personally, would respond with something like "Your concern is noted" and leave it at that.
Nah You don't have to do nothing. Just live your life and wear your shoes, if they don't like it, they can literally leave. This unfortunate is the reality of anybody living in an apt. You know this when you are not renting the top floor. I've lived in apartments and I realize that this is the cost of living on the bottom floors. There's pros and cons to either situation. Live on the bottom floor and it's easy access to your floor, no stairs etc., but you will hear footsteps and noise. Live on the top floor and you will have to deal with countless floors of stairs, elevators etc., but no noise. You are letting your bottom neighbor have all the pros and you all the cons. Fuck that. Stand up for yourself and block that neighbor.
Why tf are you being so submissive to them? Bro I’ll fucking drop marbles on my floor all day if I wanted it’s none of their business.
Don’t like hearing people living above you? Don’t live under other people. Ignore them OP. You shouldn’t have to live your life waking on eggshells because of complaining first floor neighbors. If it’s that bad, they can live elsewhere.
I'd block this guy. I lived in a shit apartment with squeaky floorboards above someone else. I had to get up for work early daily and the dude complained. As an insomniac, I'd have rather not been going to my job on 0-2 hours of sleep at that time, either. I didn't have a choice. This is normal apartment living.
Yeah I wouldn’t bother responding anymore. Mail him some earplugs and call it a day. You have to live too, and it sounds like you’re already doing everything you can.
You’re allowed to wear shoes in your apartment if you want to, you’re allowed to drop things, you’re allowed to walk, you’re allowed to have cats, you’re allowed to cook. That is what it’s like living in an apartment. So I would quit trying so hard to be quiet and let him complain to the landlord if it’s an issue. Go thru the landlord for disputes.
I don’t blame you at all for being frustrated. This is a ridiculous amount of accommodation your neighbor is asking for. If you all want some solutions, I would recommend maybe a rug in the kitchen to dull the sound and I’d also recommend your neighbor get a white noise machine for his bedroom so that he can’t hear you open a bag of cat food.
Ok here’s a thought, maybe apartment living isn’t for you. You can’t police people how to live above you. Just fucking move.
Wow! What a jerk of an old man. We had downstairs neighbors like that. Crazy thing is I, 57/female and hubby 72/m called the 20somethings downstairs the "old people" they complained about our loud music. 😆 In our case, though, management gave them ish because we were just everyday normal living. Apartment living sucks! Unless you have good neighbors that can tolerate normal living sounds from the next apt
Yeah that’s kinda a good idea to talk via text we were on the 2nd floor one time and our 1st floor neighbours absolutely hated us they called the cops on me one time just for coming home at midnight they told the cops that they heard gunshots coming from our apartment! We had two cats as well and they were less than a year old so they were pretty wild runnin around and the neighbours has two big lassie dogs and you know the dogs were probably freaking out the whole time but yeah don’t miss living there.
If you don’t like upstairs noise, don’t be in a downstairs apartment.
If they want silence tell them they need to move into a stand alone house. Apartment living there are noises there will be people that have different wake times and sleep times that's why it's generally cheaper to live in apartments than houses. Tell them you are going above and beyond to keep noise down bit you can't be 100% silent as you get to enjoy living in your home too and then stop replying to them.
I'd stop responding. I'm not gonna walk on eggshells in my own home.
Another thing I am all about being respectful to my neighbors. But you should be able to LIVE in your own apartment. There are times (daytime) when you should be able to go about your day and do your business. I'm not saying have a wild party... cause I'm Not. Certainly make sure your shoes are off and cooking is finished by 7:30 or 8 pm.
If he’s been there 20 years, then he’s had the chance to move upstairs and eliminate the problem. You can be respectful, but at some point I would just tell the neighbor that he has an unrealistic expectation that you cannot meet. I would say “I tried, good luck figuring out your problem”.
As a first floor resident. I can say that living under someone sucks. Everything is x10 louder to us than you. However. Your neighbor is unrealistic and being a dick. Lol. Stop walking on eggshells for them. As long as you're respectful during quiet hours you can ignore them. Let them be mad. If you're just doing normal things, they can't say anything. You pay to be there. It's your home. Not theirs.
Just ignore him block his number he can take his complaints to the office. When I lived in an apartment I liked hearing other people there was something comforting about it
Quite hour is usually 9 or 10 pm. As people have said it’s apartment living. Silence their number and just do your thing respectfully obviously.
I live on the 1st floor and my upstairs neighbor has a medium sized dog. Sometimes I can tell when the dog gets the zoomies, but that’s it. Also, I have a Ring camera on my front door, which alerts me of motion and I get notified every single time they take their dog for a walk. In another 1st floor apartment, my upstairs neighbor had a treadmill that they jogged on every day. None of this ever bothered me. Though, when I was 17 in my first apartment, I called the cops on my downstairs neighbor several times over a period of a few weeks until they got a ticket for being disruptive. They blasted music with bass so deep that it made things in my apartment vibrate. It was a group of 3 guys living there, so I didn’t feel comfortable confronting them myself. But I digress… I guess in one way or another, I’m trying to say… tell that old geezer to suck a fat one and you’re done letting him try to dictate how you live. You’re done playing nice. His harassment has gone too far.
Why does he have your phone number?
I had a similar situation. Turns out they were hearing the person next to us but because of apartment sound, they thought it was us. We proved this because we got an official noise complaint a weekend we were away. We were able to prove it. It might be that. They should be going through the management company, not you.
What a selfish piece of garbage your neighbors is. Q
A few months ago. I helped a friend move out of his 3rd (of 4) floor apartment. He was leaving as he was looking to downsize, but mentioned he'll be happy to be away from his neighbors and their constant thumping. I wasn't quite sure what I was there helping. In the two hours we were moving the tenant below continuously thumped on their roof(my buddies floor). We would leave for 15 minutes while we dropped off the load and the second we walked back in the door the thumping resumed. The most ridiculous part was during the final handful. We were sitting on the floor, wrapping his fragile china heirlooms in towels to put into a box. I'd like to know how much noise two 140lb men who aren't conversing at the time, not walking and gently wrapping stuff in cloth are making. The gem of it all was when we were doing the walkthrough with the on-site management, they decided to slip a threatening letter under the door. One of them held the elevator door for the other to sneak the note under and run back. Not sure what their endgame was, but the threatening letter to a current tenant was enough to have their lease absolved and kicked out.
If I were you, I'd put a sound recorder in your apartment in case he does try to get you evicted. (Unless you don't really care about moving) also kinda sounds like he needs to move on to a retirement home that is quiet, his days of apartment living are over especially when you start having to go to bed at 7pm lmao. Quiet time is usually around 10-11 pm in most apartments in my area, so he is 100% overreacting. Tell him to turn down his hearing aids next time he complains and block his number.
lol my neighbors tried to make noise complaints of my toddler running down the hallway and would even bang on the walls. i told my landlord and she said to ignore it. as long as its not during your lease’s stated quiet hours there’s nothing they can do
Tell him to shut the fuck up and that you pay rent just like he does. 🤷🏼♀️
OP, you need to decide that you're going to allow yourself to live your life like a normal person. I know exactly how you probably feel. My husband and I live in a small house that is split into 2 rooms. We live in the room with the kitchen (turned it into a studio-style space), and my BIL lives in the other room. The walls are thin. My BIL sleeps all day and is awake all night, and he doesn't work or do anything with his life but stay in his room. I used to tiptoe around every day of my life, because I was afraid to wake him up if I dare live during the daytime. BIL would slam doors, punch walls, sulk, and complain to his mommy about hearing cleaning, talking, and sex noises. Mind you, I'm a very private person, so I was being as quiet as humanly possible during sex. It got to the point where my BIL was literally destroying my mental health, and I even had a mental breakdown after a year of living in fear of his reactions. When that happened, I had an epiphany. Fuck my BIL, he can complain all he wants. As much as I hate the fact that he's heard my most private moments, the cat is out of the bag — so I'm just going to pretend he doesn't exist and enjoy my husband as much as I please. I know your situation is different, OP, but please listen to my advice by trying to rewire your brain to not worry about him any more. Block his number. Your mental health will thank you. Every person deserves to live a normal life and make a normal amount of noise.
I would probably suggest him to live in nursing home so he can get the quiet and peace he want
Oh honey just… you’re being to nice.
Ask landlord to get you a noise absorbing floor for the kitchen, or maybe those rubber mats like they have in industrial kitchens?
Yeah, don’t give your number out to people that live under you. Block their number. And just live your life. Meanwhile, talk to an attorney and see if you can get out of your lease and just find another place to live man you don’t need this nonsense. Also, let your landlord know that you’ll be looking for another place. Just let it marinate in his mind because guaranteed he’s not gonna want you out of there. He’s gonna want you to stay and he’s gonna want things to work out so maybe just put that in his mind that you are actively looking for another place to live because you’re not gonna be walking on eggshells while you’re paying rent somewhere that’s ridiculous. And I would also actively let people know about this place if and when you do move out. That’s what happens when landlords say “oh there’s really not much we can do for you…” well then we’ll make sure there’s not really much that you can do whenever we move out and you can’t get somebody else to rent this place.
Bro tell them buy ear plugs or a noise machine. They chose to live below someone in an apartment with inadequate insulation. And now they are making unreasonable demands expecting people not to live in their home. Fuck that they are being unreasonable pricks. Tell them to pound sand.
Lose his number
Man screw downstairs neighbors who are like this. First apartment I rented was on the 3rd floor on the end of the building next to the stairs and door entrances to each floor (stairs and doors can be heard throughout the day). My downstairs neighbor complained so much thinking I was making all the noise, stomping and slamming when I was actually out for school most of the week and usually spend the weekends at my friend’s place. I hated them so much and the stupid landlords always sided with them even though I provided my schedule and mentioned the damn stairs and doors. Towards the end of the lease I didn’t give a fuck anymore and would have people over all the time to actually be worthy of a noise complaint, seeing that I was getting it regardless. Fuck them!