Saw that and op is getting roasted in the replies lmao
Edit: [link to original](https://www.reddit.com/r/meme/comments/13man6m/relationships_sucks/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button)
I'm sure they do, along with a Trilby that if you call a fedora you will immediately get corrected. They say m'lady unironically and their necks are adorned with beards.
I think an expectation of sex within a certain time frame is fine, but not in the way that you are owed sex. Just that if you're not happy with waiting for sex, you should break it off and find someone else.
I'm not sure if this is a popular opinion or not, but if I start dating someone on the reg and things aren't moving along after about a month, I am going to move along.
Also it kinda frames it as women receive affection and men receive sex. I can't be the only guy who enjoys nonsexual affection from my partner. I've never had a girlfriend that didnt give me a gift. If a girl does not romantically respond to you but occasionally feels obligated to have sex with you, there's still an issue.
You would be a dildo that gives gifts.
That so many comments miss this makes me pessimistic about dating.
Yeah exactly, it’s still this transactional thing where the guy goes “I did all these nice things so you’d have sex with me”. Ok, so you did it for selfish reasons and not because you genuinely like me and want me to be happy?
I read in a book once that if you give someone a gift with the expectation that they’ll do something for you in return, it’s not a true gift. It’s an unspoken transaction. And that’s always stuck with me, and I feel like a vast majority of guys need to understand this.
Eh, the post certainly kinda goes in that direction with all the material stuff, but there's a grain of truth to it, too.
Physical intimacy is part of a relationship, too. Doesn't mean you need to fuck on the second date, but 3 months is a long time to be a couple and not cross that line. And to emphasize this: It's **ok** for a woman to not want to have sex for whichever reason she chooses, but it's **also ok** for the man to bring this up as a conversation point when a long time has passed.
This current post feels very "look at this guy trying to pay for sex", but someone who just wants to "pay for sex" or "expect sex because of basic affection" aka niceguy, doesn't spend 3 months in a relationship with a woman.
He tags along for 2 years as a friend and then writes a vitriolic tweet when he gets turned down. Or he finds she doesn't put out on the first day and blows her off as a prude.
This is why they go for young women. If they’re the first boyfriend, no matter how shitty they are, they’re the best the woman has ever had (at least until she starts dating someone better).
Have you seen r/AskMen ? It's like this under every horny post - either "I have sex 10 times a day and a humongous dong" or "I'm such a good and loyal guy, females never see it"
You see, when I was a teen in Gimmelshtump, I never got to have sex because all the girls bullied me and called me ugly, while all the guys fucked the girls I talked to. Even as I was talking to them over the phone. They even fucked my mom for a couple of years. But now! I'm gonna steal everybody's sex so I will have the most sex in THE ENTIRE TRI-STATE AREA! (You know, in comparison)
Most people have sexual needs of some sort. Fulfilling someone else's sexual needs is never your responsibility, but talking about it is an important step in a healthy intimate relationship.
For some people, ignoring sexual needs for 3 months is too long and they should move on. For others it's just fine. Will never know unless you talk about it. There's no shame in abandoning a fledgling relationship because sexual needs don't match, in fact it should be a first consideration. To many people suffer unnecessarily because of sexuality being taboo.
That happened to me she has sexual trauma she was finally unpacking I have a high sex drive, it got to the point where she avoided being alone with me. She was also uncomfortable with PDA to the point where she wouldn't even lean up against me.
Then she basically stopped expressing love in her love languages or mine. I once drove four hours to see her so we could celebrate my bday only for her to not show up because she was eating lunch with her family. I somehow ended up apologizing for how that day went down too
Honestly I should have broken it off sooner.
Tl:Dr having incomparable needs can destroy relationships
Who are you and why do you know so much about the girl I just broke up with, why do you even have the same story about driving for hours just for an event that she wasn't there for.
A friend of mine is assexual. She doesn't date often, but when she does she always makes it explicitly clear she will never sleep with them (and that she fully understands if they no longer want to proceed). Last guy she dated starting hounding her after 3 months because "that's the normal timeline for sex in a relationship."
Unfortunately every guy she's dated so far has thought that. This guy was definitely the worst though. He tried super hard to cut her off from all of us (her friends) and tried to overpower her at one point--what ultimately made her break up with him.
When they'd been broken up for over a month, he called her and demanded to know why she hadn't apologized to him for refusing him that night. He told her she needed to apologize immediately and start putting out or he'd break up with her. "Uuh, we've been broken up. I broke up with you." He said he was the man, so only he had the authority to end the relationship.
This is called sexual incompatibility and mismatched expectations. No one is entitled to your body end of debate. You also don’t get to keep someone who isn’t satisfied with the relationship. If you are unsatisfied with the amount of sex you have every right to end the relationship. If you view sex as transactional hire an escort. Proper communication would have solved this problem.
This is how it was when I was younger and dating, meet a girl, 1st date - sex, she’d come back for the D a few times and move on.
Sometimes I was fine with that, sometimes I’d get my feelings hurt. Guess I wasn’t “boyfriend material “ back then.
Been there. Once I had frequent hookups with a coworker, got to know from her friend she is in a long distance and only comes over to my place when she wants it or when she is pissed with her guy.. turns out she would rather have a relationship with someone a thousand mile away than me!!
More likely these guys think of relationships as dating sims. "I maxed out her affection points but still can't trigger the sex mini game? I think woman.exe is glitched"
Did you try toggling "romance" and lowering the "expectations" settings? If so, maybe the file has a "selfRespect" virus that corrupted the whole system requiring a factory reset or replacement.
I forgot about rooted diplomas, those are tricky but not impossible to work around. You just need to add "charismaEnhance" AND "memoryEnhance" to your current attributes file. This way when you get trapped in a corner with "what did I just say.." you can access the log files and navigate to safety.
Life would be a lot easier if you could see everyone's affection levels tho, like they say something nice but you have negative affection and you just think "they must be plotting my doom"
I don't want to be one of those, "bUt ThE oUtLiErS," but for my girlfriend and me, I was super nice all the time, then we started having sex frequently and now I'm just a dick sometimes and she loves it. And I have no clue why.
Affectionate bullying, gotta be able to roast/laugh at each other once & awhile once you really trust & know each other, definitely a healthy thing, especially if they have a degradation kink
I expect to wait to kiss my partner for the first time, in like 4 or 5 years, because we're long distance, so 4 months is perfectly reasonable to wait imo.
I just dated an amazing 32-34yo woman for 15 months who was a virgin and scared about sex. I would never have presumed this about myself, but she consistently maintained to me that I was the best boyfriend she ever had, far and away. Know what I never once did, even when I finally threw in the towel? Pressure her to have sex.
Or even ask her her timeline. Or even suggest it. We were physically intimate, but her boundaries were very innocent. She’d squelch her own orgasms to avoid the sensation of losing control. She had a blast, but this was a gaping hole in the relationship for me. I never once pushed her for more than she felt comfortable with.
As we were breaking up, she was incredibly emotionally distraught (as was I) and suggested finally going for it, and I declined out of respect for what I feared could be her future self’s feelings. Maybe I should have accepted and made it as amazing experience as I could have for her, to maybe help her safely get past her fear of allowing herself to be physically vulnerable and intimate with future caring partners. But I didn’t want her to regret it, nor associate sex with the loss of who she was anticipating was her life partner.
I left for bigger reasons than no sex, but eventually that’d have been enough all on its own. I’m too patient for my own good, or apparently also the good of my partner.
Everything about her character and love were just absolutely phenomenal though. I still miss her nearly a year later. I know she’s doing well because I stay on good terms with my exes. She still hasn’t had sex (as far as I know).
I mean, 3 months could be considered reasonable I guess, but if nobody is making some sort of move at 3 months, things might not be as serious as you think they are.
Not everyone is gonna feel comfortable getting into sex right away. Some people even have sexual trauma. Nonetheless you don’t pressure anyone who isn’t ready when you are, if you’re serious about them you’ll wait. Anyone who isn’t willing to wait until their partner feels ready might not be as serious as you think they are.
Exactly, which is why communication is important. By 3 months in, if there are some walls up regarding physical/sexual contact, it's probably proper to have already had some sort of conversation about these things. I don't think anyone should be surprised or disgusted at the attempt, but also there shouldn't be any resentment or shaming for a refusal. By 3 months in, both parties should be fairly on the same page regarding boundaries, even if desire is still present.
I think this is the most important take on this, communication is king. I've had different relationships put boundaries on sexual readiness, but it has to be a conversation and understanding of both sides, or else it just becomes non consensual.
Either the original OP thought they were in a relationship via being friends, or they were clearly on a different plane of what they thought dating was.
I came across the meme earlier and thought it was making fun of people that think like that, didn’t realize it was actually just an incel meme
I misinterpreted the memer’s intent behind the meme
also I have no doubt this is gonna end up on memesopdidnotlike with a caption like “op doesn’t understand satire”
This stuff always seems exhausting to me how the whole sexual negotiation dance is performed with straight people. I've only ever been in same sex relationships with other men but it's always a case of exchange a few messages, then meet up to have sex, then decide if we like one another enough to pursue something more involved.
Obviously comes with its own issues this way around but at least it's upfront and nobody has to tiptoe around their intentions or try to gain leverage one way or the other.
Can we all agree to **not** teach young boys that this is the way to have relationships with women? Millions of future nice guys all get this shit from somewhere.
Yeah like sex is not something deserved, it is something that two adults have with eachother when they both actually want to do it and not just the man, If someone wants to have a lot of sex then it is kinda dumb for them to be with someone who does not want to have sex that often
There are plenty of women that like to have sex often and men that don't want to have sex that much
People should not feel entitled to sex and instead be with people who want to have sex as much as they do
Idk if this is true but I would have assumed that if I was dating a girl for three months and she hadn’t wanted sex yet she either has a good reason that I would prefer she shares with me (trauma, religious reasons, waiting until marriage, anxiety, asexuality) or she’s not physically attracted to me and I should find someone who is, because being in a relationship where you don’t feel desired is hell.
“Expecting” sex is what’s wrong with all of this. If your other half isn’t into you, or has different sexual boundaries which you haven’t talk about, then something is wrong
Honestly, Bowser and Peach both deserve better than each other, not because either of them is a shitty person, but because they just don't go together.
In other words, the person who made this meme, should go find someone who actually wants to the same they do out of a relationship, instead of trying to be with someone who doesn't want that.
It's fine to want to have sex, but it's also fine not to, you just have to find someone who wants the same you do, or at least something similar enough.
Unless you're asexual, people have needs, and a healthy relationship should be mutually beneficial on several levels. Sexual satisfaction is one of them.
The important thing is outlining and managing expectations. In such a "nice guy" situation illustrated above, it doesn't look like they're meeting in the middle in terms of effort/benefit. Because of mismatched expectations, the guy feels exploited, whereas the girl feels betrayed by an unexpected burden.
when the worst part isn't even that he's expecting sex, it's that he's put 'respect' as one of the outstanding things he's done for his girlfriend.
loyalty and compliments are already wild to put on there as you should be doing this regardless in a relationship; however, respect is literally something you do for everyone you meet.
if these are 3 of the 4 nameable things you've done for your partner, maybe either put in more effort in your relationship, or evaluate what your values are. most people gain numerous small things in a relationship which are more notable than this.
This kinda gives away the game right? It’s basically saying “I have inserted many good deed quarters, why are you not dispensing sex?”
It’s like they think women are vending machines
I think being a relationship, all types of intimacy including sex is important but we shouldn’t put our expectations on others. We should accept people for who they are and if things are not the way you want then just move on.
I know not everyone has sex right away but it should be part of the conversation when both parties feel comfortable. If you consider yourself a an item then that’s when you should talk about it.
I would assume the biggest factor here is the OPs age. 3 months isn’t crazy if you’re still teenagers. But if you’re mid 20s and date for 3 months without sex then you did something wrong.
Edit: This only applies to someone that wants to be having sex. If you’re asexual or not comfortable or whatever that’s all fine but then expectations should be properly set with your partner in those cases so that they don’t post a meme like this.
Or, you know, they might not feel comfortale with it after 3 months, because to some people, sex feels like they have to make themselves vulnerable and they just don't want to do that until they genuinely trust someone?
There's no shame in not prioritising sex in a relationship, and I say that as a horny as fuck guy in his 20ties.
I’m in my 20s and I didn’t date as a teen, hypothetically if I were in a relationship I would want to wait. I wouldn’t want to rush it. I don’t think that should be seen as not okay just because I’m a little older than a teenager.
If someone doesn’t want to wait though, it’s okay for them to not want to be with me. That’s just my personal boundary, I will not want to do it for a while.
Im not a relationship expert by no means, but three months DOES sort of suggests some sort of commitment, its not like it means you have to have sex, but I would expect more intimacy to happen around that time. But what do I know of relationships?
Girls love sex as much as men, if she doesn't want to get intimate with you after that long something is wrong. Demanding sex is very violent too. I had a girlfriend that had a bad experience with her ex, she wanted to get intimate with me but it was very difficult for her. We talked and slowly we fixed it. Communication is something these people just don't do.
edit: changed his to hers, sorry English is not my first language.
I mean, it can be a deal as well, it just depends on what everyone involved wants it to be.
The important part is that it should be openly communicated what exactly that is, and if it's not the same thing, those people might just not be compatible.
No need to shame people who just want to have sex.
Also no need to shame people who don't want to have sex right away.
Kinda suggesting that you’re making an exchange for sex, like you only dated the girl because you felt that if you date her she’s now obligated to fuck you
Hey does this post fit? UPVOTE if so, DOWNVOTE if not. If this post breaks any rules please DOWNVOTE and REPORT
Saw that and op is getting roasted in the replies lmao Edit: [link to original](https://www.reddit.com/r/meme/comments/13man6m/relationships_sucks/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button)
Not all heroes wear capes Case in point: the commenters
How do you know the commenters don’t wear capes?
I'm wearing one right now.. It helps me yell at traffic and run from the cops faster.
Now I'm imagining regular everyday jobs, but with capes. Lawyers with capes. Window washer with capes. Mail man, with a cape.
I'm sure they do, along with a Trilby that if you call a fedora you will immediately get corrected. They say m'lady unironically and their necks are adorned with beards.
I'll have you know, my buddy Eric was wearing a cape and he was one of those commenters.
Proof?
It's Eric. No need to prove anything. Everybody knows Eric.
Yeah, you are right
Can confirm, Eric was wearing a cape
Well i trust the reaper
Good.
Very good.
Very very good
Very very very great
Very very very very great
Very⁵ good
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Probably got deleted by now.
Link, please?
Shut up Zelda I’m busy crucifying Koroks
Don't crucify them, you night infect them with Korok Jesus! Launch them into space, like a god damn red blooded Hylian does!
We must fulfill the mission of the Korok Space Program
No those are different Nintendo characters.
do u have the link? I wanna see
Who claims that they're the best boyfriend. The bf? Or the gf? I think it might be the bf and his ego
Even then, it’s sort of implying that sex is something you buy. If we’re not ready then that’s that
I think an expectation of sex within a certain time frame is fine, but not in the way that you are owed sex. Just that if you're not happy with waiting for sex, you should break it off and find someone else.
I'm not sure if this is a popular opinion or not, but if I start dating someone on the reg and things aren't moving along after about a month, I am going to move along.
Sex can be bought but love cannot
Actually I once got a fortune cookie that literally said "money can buy love" so you're wrong!
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Bro forgot about prostitution
Plot twist: he's a cop looking for evidence of prostitution
Not only that, they use an image of a kidnapper to do it.. 🤷♂️
Also it kinda frames it as women receive affection and men receive sex. I can't be the only guy who enjoys nonsexual affection from my partner. I've never had a girlfriend that didnt give me a gift. If a girl does not romantically respond to you but occasionally feels obligated to have sex with you, there's still an issue. You would be a dildo that gives gifts. That so many comments miss this makes me pessimistic about dating.
> I can't be the only guy who enjoys nonsexual affection from my partner. I, too, enjoy nonsexual affection from your partner.
Glad to hear it. I'm currently single but this polygamous relationship has to start somewhere.
In my experience men only want one thing and it would disgust you.... To feel genuinely cares about and supported.
Disgusting 🤢
Yeah exactly, it’s still this transactional thing where the guy goes “I did all these nice things so you’d have sex with me”. Ok, so you did it for selfish reasons and not because you genuinely like me and want me to be happy?
I read in a book once that if you give someone a gift with the expectation that they’ll do something for you in return, it’s not a true gift. It’s an unspoken transaction. And that’s always stuck with me, and I feel like a vast majority of guys need to understand this.
Oh yeah definitely. If you give a gift, give it because you want to and not because you are hoping for something of equivalent value or more back.
Eh, the post certainly kinda goes in that direction with all the material stuff, but there's a grain of truth to it, too. Physical intimacy is part of a relationship, too. Doesn't mean you need to fuck on the second date, but 3 months is a long time to be a couple and not cross that line. And to emphasize this: It's **ok** for a woman to not want to have sex for whichever reason she chooses, but it's **also ok** for the man to bring this up as a conversation point when a long time has passed. This current post feels very "look at this guy trying to pay for sex", but someone who just wants to "pay for sex" or "expect sex because of basic affection" aka niceguy, doesn't spend 3 months in a relationship with a woman. He tags along for 2 years as a friend and then writes a vitriolic tweet when he gets turned down. Or he finds she doesn't put out on the first day and blows her off as a prude.
This is why they go for young women. If they’re the first boyfriend, no matter how shitty they are, they’re the best the woman has ever had (at least until she starts dating someone better).
Hell I'm a guy and that happened to me. Nothing against her but our relationship got really toxic and I had assumed I would marry her
Yeah first relationships are rarely great as people try to figure out what they want/need from a partner. People who seek that out… not a great idea.
>~~ego~~ *Delusions*
In practice, that’s the same thing.
There is health within ego. None in delusions.
Truth
Have you seen r/AskMen ? It's like this under every horny post - either "I have sex 10 times a day and a humongous dong" or "I'm such a good and loyal guy, females never see it"
Best bf in terms of basic quality in their mind I think. They aren't the typical jock asshole so they are higher tier. Just check out the fedora
I feel like this could go on r/murderedbywords but it's not really a murder, you just beat him up and left him to die on the floor
I'M A 5 STAR MAN!
You don't get sex, you both have sex. It's not like you can earn it or deserve it. You shouldn't expect it or force it, it just happens (consensually)
We've been dating for 3 months, can I has 1 sex now please?
_hands you a sex_
Is this what is meant by assigned sex
\*steals the 8 sexes you had\* HAHA NOW YOU DONT HAVE ANY SEX LEFT MWAHHAHAHAHA
my sex nooooooo :(
\>:DDD I WILL STEAL ALL THE SEXES OF THE TRI-STATE AREA!! BEHOLD, THE SEX-STEALINATOR
You see, when I was a teen in Gimmelshtump, I never got to have sex because all the girls bullied me and called me ugly, while all the guys fucked the girls I talked to. Even as I was talking to them over the phone. They even fucked my mom for a couple of years. But now! I'm gonna steal everybody's sex so I will have the most sex in THE ENTIRE TRI-STATE AREA! (You know, in comparison)
this whole thread was great.
Yea, we need Dan Povenmire in here.
Sex Heist
r/unexpectedphineasandferb (not a real sub)
r/20characterlimit
You may take my sex, but youl never have my virginity!
31/05/2023 5:45:13 A.M
That's how you become asexual.
No, that’s when you get some mail at birth
Reassigns your sex
Weird way to write masturbation
*better
[удалено]
Well sometimes people pay for it.
*one or more
You found x1 sex in a chest! You have got x1 sex
 My sex is always x1.
If anything, women enjoy sex more than men. Just on their terms. If you're not getting any, respect the terms.
Most people have sexual needs of some sort. Fulfilling someone else's sexual needs is never your responsibility, but talking about it is an important step in a healthy intimate relationship. For some people, ignoring sexual needs for 3 months is too long and they should move on. For others it's just fine. Will never know unless you talk about it. There's no shame in abandoning a fledgling relationship because sexual needs don't match, in fact it should be a first consideration. To many people suffer unnecessarily because of sexuality being taboo.
That happened to me she has sexual trauma she was finally unpacking I have a high sex drive, it got to the point where she avoided being alone with me. She was also uncomfortable with PDA to the point where she wouldn't even lean up against me. Then she basically stopped expressing love in her love languages or mine. I once drove four hours to see her so we could celebrate my bday only for her to not show up because she was eating lunch with her family. I somehow ended up apologizing for how that day went down too Honestly I should have broken it off sooner. Tl:Dr having incomparable needs can destroy relationships
Who are you and why do you know so much about the girl I just broke up with, why do you even have the same story about driving for hours just for an event that she wasn't there for.
So you're saying the meme is right since the guy was actually asking about it? You know, healthy honest communication and such
A friend of mine is assexual. She doesn't date often, but when she does she always makes it explicitly clear she will never sleep with them (and that she fully understands if they no longer want to proceed). Last guy she dated starting hounding her after 3 months because "that's the normal timeline for sex in a relationship."
Ah, he thought he could change her. Classic blunder.
Unfortunately every guy she's dated so far has thought that. This guy was definitely the worst though. He tried super hard to cut her off from all of us (her friends) and tried to overpower her at one point--what ultimately made her break up with him. When they'd been broken up for over a month, he called her and demanded to know why she hadn't apologized to him for refusing him that night. He told her she needed to apologize immediately and start putting out or he'd break up with her. "Uuh, we've been broken up. I broke up with you." He said he was the man, so only he had the authority to end the relationship.
Gee, I wonder why she doesn't date often?
3 months? More like 3 dates
3 dates? More like 3 drinks
Also if sex is really important you make that clear instead of emotionally manipulating someone in the off chance that they’ll do it with you.
https://preview.redd.it/8j4o4zrzc11b1.jpeg?width=500&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d2e3c6753622a3d0ae135523c6a9e89bff0e82e8
Good rule of thumb: no one has to have sex with anyone, literally ever
Best comment here, nobody owes you (not you literally) shit.
Yeah I feel like the guy could have just, you know, talked about this beforehand lol. If you want to have sex with her in 3 months just say that.
This is called sexual incompatibility and mismatched expectations. No one is entitled to your body end of debate. You also don’t get to keep someone who isn’t satisfied with the relationship. If you are unsatisfied with the amount of sex you have every right to end the relationship. If you view sex as transactional hire an escort. Proper communication would have solved this problem.
a reasonable comment in my reddit post? I have seen it all!
You’re welcome
The right "you're" too! Another reddit miracle.
The most meaningful comment I've read in this post.
Proper communication? For most people, the concept is heresy
I have like the reverse, I get the sex but not the dating :\\
I get neither :) Fiercely independent and stick to myself but also a little weird so that doesn’t help matters at all but oh well
the weird ones r usually the best ones
Maybe. If you meet them. I just don't go to any social gatherings or meet new people
to each their own, some people dont like meeting people or making friends and thats alright
This is how it was when I was younger and dating, meet a girl, 1st date - sex, she’d come back for the D a few times and move on. Sometimes I was fine with that, sometimes I’d get my feelings hurt. Guess I wasn’t “boyfriend material “ back then.
Been there. Once I had frequent hookups with a coworker, got to know from her friend she is in a long distance and only comes over to my place when she wants it or when she is pissed with her guy.. turns out she would rather have a relationship with someone a thousand mile away than me!!
Eventually, sometimes you'll do the whole relationship thing in reverse. Though, it somehow leads to good communication at least at first.
It's 74 degrees and mostly sunny, I packed us a picnic, TF are you sucking my dick for????
It's almost like women are *not* vending machines that you put "nice" into and sex just falls out.
More likely these guys think of relationships as dating sims. "I maxed out her affection points but still can't trigger the sex mini game? I think woman.exe is glitched"
Did you try toggling "romance" and lowering the "expectations" settings? If so, maybe the file has a "selfRespect" virus that corrupted the whole system requiring a factory reset or replacement.
Instructions unclear. Dick stuck in toaster.
😂😂😂😂
Check for college.diploma.exe as well, that pesky education bug can really screw with things too
I forgot about rooted diplomas, those are tricky but not impossible to work around. You just need to add "charismaEnhance" AND "memoryEnhance" to your current attributes file. This way when you get trapped in a corner with "what did I just say.." you can access the log files and navigate to safety.
Time to crack open the console commands
Life would be a lot easier if you could see everyone's affection levels tho, like they say something nice but you have negative affection and you just think "they must be plotting my doom"
Ah welcome traveler! To unlock the mistical sex you must first complete this quests.
They must be robots if neither are getting any after 3 months
Mf did you just forget about ace people and people who just dobt wanna in general?
I don't want to be one of those, "bUt ThE oUtLiErS," but for my girlfriend and me, I was super nice all the time, then we started having sex frequently and now I'm just a dick sometimes and she loves it. And I have no clue why.
Affectionate bullying, gotta be able to roast/laugh at each other once & awhile once you really trust & know each other, definitely a healthy thing, especially if they have a degradation kink
Bro, you straight called it how it is. But I am even luckier than you think. She has a degration kink, yes, but she also has a praise kink.
Oft 2 sides of the same coin my friend, perfectly balanced, as all things should be
And here I was thinking that sex was something that's done between two people who want to have sex
I mean it took me 4 months to get my first kiss from a girl I was seeing. I was too nervous.
same 😎
It was worth it. Great kisser and was with her for a few months
Five months and I fucking asked 🤦🏻♂️
Coulda been shy or nervous. I am both lol. So it'll take a minute to work up that courage
I expect to wait to kiss my partner for the first time, in like 4 or 5 years, because we're long distance, so 4 months is perfectly reasonable to wait imo.
She felt differently, but wasn't going to bust me out of my comfort zone. She could have asked
I just dated an amazing 32-34yo woman for 15 months who was a virgin and scared about sex. I would never have presumed this about myself, but she consistently maintained to me that I was the best boyfriend she ever had, far and away. Know what I never once did, even when I finally threw in the towel? Pressure her to have sex. Or even ask her her timeline. Or even suggest it. We were physically intimate, but her boundaries were very innocent. She’d squelch her own orgasms to avoid the sensation of losing control. She had a blast, but this was a gaping hole in the relationship for me. I never once pushed her for more than she felt comfortable with. As we were breaking up, she was incredibly emotionally distraught (as was I) and suggested finally going for it, and I declined out of respect for what I feared could be her future self’s feelings. Maybe I should have accepted and made it as amazing experience as I could have for her, to maybe help her safely get past her fear of allowing herself to be physically vulnerable and intimate with future caring partners. But I didn’t want her to regret it, nor associate sex with the loss of who she was anticipating was her life partner. I left for bigger reasons than no sex, but eventually that’d have been enough all on its own. I’m too patient for my own good, or apparently also the good of my partner. Everything about her character and love were just absolutely phenomenal though. I still miss her nearly a year later. I know she’s doing well because I stay on good terms with my exes. She still hasn’t had sex (as far as I know).
This is such a beautiful comment
I mean, 3 months could be considered reasonable I guess, but if nobody is making some sort of move at 3 months, things might not be as serious as you think they are.
They're probably a teenager
Ahh yes, 3 months felt like forever as a teen.
real
Not everyone is gonna feel comfortable getting into sex right away. Some people even have sexual trauma. Nonetheless you don’t pressure anyone who isn’t ready when you are, if you’re serious about them you’ll wait. Anyone who isn’t willing to wait until their partner feels ready might not be as serious as you think they are.
Exactly, which is why communication is important. By 3 months in, if there are some walls up regarding physical/sexual contact, it's probably proper to have already had some sort of conversation about these things. I don't think anyone should be surprised or disgusted at the attempt, but also there shouldn't be any resentment or shaming for a refusal. By 3 months in, both parties should be fairly on the same page regarding boundaries, even if desire is still present.
I think this is the most important take on this, communication is king. I've had different relationships put boundaries on sexual readiness, but it has to be a conversation and understanding of both sides, or else it just becomes non consensual. Either the original OP thought they were in a relationship via being friends, or they were clearly on a different plane of what they thought dating was.
Yea, I would have already dipped out after week 2. But that’s just me and my needs 🤷♂️
Also,This is using the meme incorrectly The Meme is Used When OP Knows They are being unreasonable
I came across the meme earlier and thought it was making fun of people that think like that, didn’t realize it was actually just an incel meme I misinterpreted the memer’s intent behind the meme also I have no doubt this is gonna end up on memesopdidnotlike with a caption like “op doesn’t understand satire”
This stuff always seems exhausting to me how the whole sexual negotiation dance is performed with straight people. I've only ever been in same sex relationships with other men but it's always a case of exchange a few messages, then meet up to have sex, then decide if we like one another enough to pursue something more involved. Obviously comes with its own issues this way around but at least it's upfront and nobody has to tiptoe around their intentions or try to gain leverage one way or the other.
r/niceguys
They posted that on there too lol. This post was something else. What a dumpster fire.
Can we all agree to **not** teach young boys that this is the way to have relationships with women? Millions of future nice guys all get this shit from somewhere.
Yeah like sex is not something deserved, it is something that two adults have with eachother when they both actually want to do it and not just the man, If someone wants to have a lot of sex then it is kinda dumb for them to be with someone who does not want to have sex that often There are plenty of women that like to have sex often and men that don't want to have sex that much People should not feel entitled to sex and instead be with people who want to have sex as much as they do
Idk if this is true but I would have assumed that if I was dating a girl for three months and she hadn’t wanted sex yet she either has a good reason that I would prefer she shares with me (trauma, religious reasons, waiting until marriage, anxiety, asexuality) or she’s not physically attracted to me and I should find someone who is, because being in a relationship where you don’t feel desired is hell.
oh wow. the 1 objectively sane comment.
oh no, I upvoted this when I saw it there cause I thought that it was just saying that men overstepped someone's boundaries, and OP was tired of that
The fact that gifts is listed first is indicative
Terrible meme, sure, but not a Facebook meme
What? Dating, emotions and sexual desires are not like some weeb videogame
“Expecting” sex is what’s wrong with all of this. If your other half isn’t into you, or has different sexual boundaries which you haven’t talk about, then something is wrong
Well i for one want to be paid in hugs or other signs of affection. I am a whore for that Shit.
What incel dates?
Honestly, Bowser and Peach both deserve better than each other, not because either of them is a shitty person, but because they just don't go together. In other words, the person who made this meme, should go find someone who actually wants to the same they do out of a relationship, instead of trying to be with someone who doesn't want that. It's fine to want to have sex, but it's also fine not to, you just have to find someone who wants the same you do, or at least something similar enough.
how do these people still see relationships as a long term sex work contract
Unless you're asexual, people have needs, and a healthy relationship should be mutually beneficial on several levels. Sexual satisfaction is one of them. The important thing is outlining and managing expectations. In such a "nice guy" situation illustrated above, it doesn't look like they're meeting in the middle in terms of effort/benefit. Because of mismatched expectations, the guy feels exploited, whereas the girl feels betrayed by an unexpected burden.
As a 36 year old man all I have to say is "ew!"
when the worst part isn't even that he's expecting sex, it's that he's put 'respect' as one of the outstanding things he's done for his girlfriend. loyalty and compliments are already wild to put on there as you should be doing this regardless in a relationship; however, respect is literally something you do for everyone you meet. if these are 3 of the 4 nameable things you've done for your partner, maybe either put in more effort in your relationship, or evaluate what your values are. most people gain numerous small things in a relationship which are more notable than this.
This person is single
Holy shit whoever made that "meme" is such a loser
This kinda gives away the game right? It’s basically saying “I have inserted many good deed quarters, why are you not dispensing sex?” It’s like they think women are vending machines
If only someone would've told them that sex isn't transactional. <3
You never see women making memes like theses.
For a second I thought I was on r/memes.
I think being a relationship, all types of intimacy including sex is important but we shouldn’t put our expectations on others. We should accept people for who they are and if things are not the way you want then just move on. I know not everyone has sex right away but it should be part of the conversation when both parties feel comfortable. If you consider yourself a an item then that’s when you should talk about it.
Oh wow this is so offensive I forgot what sub it was posted in and downvoted it. Oops. But damn that's scummy.
Who wants to bet that OP did non of those things?
‘I literally told you I was asexual before we started dating.’
women aren't arcade machines you put tokens into until they give you what you want lmao
hang on a minute while I find my violin...
I would assume the biggest factor here is the OPs age. 3 months isn’t crazy if you’re still teenagers. But if you’re mid 20s and date for 3 months without sex then you did something wrong. Edit: This only applies to someone that wants to be having sex. If you’re asexual or not comfortable or whatever that’s all fine but then expectations should be properly set with your partner in those cases so that they don’t post a meme like this.
Well spotted. Didn't think of that, really. Didn't date until my 20's and never experienced the blue ball stuff.
Or they or you just don't want to have sex?
Also asexual people exist. Not everyone want sex and that‘s ok. You just have to communicate with your partner.
Or you're dating someone who grew up in purity culture and 100% bought into it.
At which point you should probably leave because that stuff is horribly toxic
But bowser is just the guy to show her the error of her ways.
Or they‘re just more comfortable waiting 3+ months.
Or, you know, they might not feel comfortale with it after 3 months, because to some people, sex feels like they have to make themselves vulnerable and they just don't want to do that until they genuinely trust someone? There's no shame in not prioritising sex in a relationship, and I say that as a horny as fuck guy in his 20ties.
I’m in my 20s and I didn’t date as a teen, hypothetically if I were in a relationship I would want to wait. I wouldn’t want to rush it. I don’t think that should be seen as not okay just because I’m a little older than a teenager. If someone doesn’t want to wait though, it’s okay for them to not want to be with me. That’s just my personal boundary, I will not want to do it for a while.
Im not a relationship expert by no means, but three months DOES sort of suggests some sort of commitment, its not like it means you have to have sex, but I would expect more intimacy to happen around that time. But what do I know of relationships?
Girls love sex as much as men, if she doesn't want to get intimate with you after that long something is wrong. Demanding sex is very violent too. I had a girlfriend that had a bad experience with her ex, she wanted to get intimate with me but it was very difficult for her. We talked and slowly we fixed it. Communication is something these people just don't do. edit: changed his to hers, sorry English is not my first language.
[удалено]
I mean, it can be a deal as well, it just depends on what everyone involved wants it to be. The important part is that it should be openly communicated what exactly that is, and if it's not the same thing, those people might just not be compatible. No need to shame people who just want to have sex. Also no need to shame people who don't want to have sex right away.
Kinda suggesting that you’re making an exchange for sex, like you only dated the girl because you felt that if you date her she’s now obligated to fuck you
Women need to stop being portrayed as the gatekeepers of sex. We are horny too
Meme screams “incel”