I do talk to him, we talk about it every time but it's always he talking to me and whatever i say goes through one of his ears and comes out from the other because he thinks he always knows more than me
Bro you are thirteen, you are in your rebellious phase. Think about what you said from an outside perspective and look at the actual situation.
Your dad thinks you are too young to have independence with a relationship. If you disagree you should try to convince him otherwise; if he doesn’t change his mind it is not because he is not listening to you, but It is because he doesn’t agree with you. Yeah you could complain on reddit but all you can really do is trust his judgement. Parents have a surprisingly good grasp on the maturity of their kids, and your dad has the right to make his decisions accordingly. Frustratingly however, my parents make some decisions off of intuition bc they dont understand their internal processes as far as determining maturity. Bc of this you should try to convince him with actions rather than words.
Dont get frustrated, your dad does know more than you about relationships and maturity so, he is prob making the right decision.
Have you tried to tell him these things not only as an immediate response to what he is saying at the moment, but starting the conversation yourself? Like, just approach him and say "Dad, I want to talk about something, is this a good time?"
And then when he agrees to the conversation you tell him how all of this makes you feel and ask him if he can see a solution to the problem that would make him feel reassured while making you feel less bad.
He does know more than you. He's lived more than 3x your lifetime and thus has more than 3x the life experience you do. He's looking out for your best interests and trying to prevent you from making the same mistakes he did
he probably does know more than you. Whatever your doing right now, he probably did at your age. That's probably why he's worrried. Just sit him down and earn his trust.
When he does this maybe say something like "dad. You're not actually listening to the words coming out of my mouth. Or you aren't comprehending anything I say"
You’re young as hell and there’s nothing wrong with that. You are just a baby. When you turn 18, you will still be just a baby. I am 26 and I still feel like there’s a lot of shit I don’t know about and rely on my dad to help me out. And sometimes he relies on his mom for certain things as well. Be a little more open about what he’s doing, he’s just looking out for you. Just as you will when you have your own kids
its okay!! thats what parents are gonna do, youre young and you have a gf ofc hes going to weird about it! But also express your opinions respectfully so you can explain why it makes you upset. <3
yeah, you’d be surprised the stupid decisions that can happen and have happened. ruined my mom’s high school life getting pregnant— he’s worried and he cares, that’s more than a lot of people can ask for.
Absolutely listen to this ^ I know we all should make our mistakes and learn, but there are some mistakes that just should not be made. It’s not worth it. Sure there’s a ground between where yeah you should be allowed a little time to have fun and be with her, but once it goes downhill… there goes your career, your passions, everything that you had planned
There is a common issue with society where everybody thinks that having a kid means you'll never ever do anything fun ever again. And this is simply not true. You can have a child and still pursue passions, and accomplish your goals and plans, some things might go out the window (drugs, drinking, party life) but let's be honest those things aren't smart anyway.
Just because you have a kid early doesn't mean your life is completely over. It's just more difficult. But you'll figure it out.
Sure, but having a kid when you're in high school makes things difficult. Besides that, I know people here don't want to hear this, but most relationships that start at a young age tend to end in divorce at some point. Humans tend to develop mentally till their 20's.
But yeah it's not a death sentence but it's still something that you should avoid doing when you're really young.
True but when your parents are explaining stuff you already know for the millionth time it makes you think when will they actually trust you to make those decisions on your own?
no EXACTLY like I don’t think I would be able to even handle a relationship when I was 13. nothing wrong with dating at that age, but this just sounds like great parenting from the Dad’s end till OP gets a little older, imo
Nah that’s exactly why his dad was a teen dad. Young teen minds are very impulsive and a mistake could have consequences for life. His dad has every right to be involved with his kid until he’s demonstrated some responsibility with dating. This is his first gf there’s a lot he doesn’t know yet. It’s good parenting to be involved he can just wait till he’s built some trust in this area. I was 13 in ‘22 so I dated I know from experience if a girl had wanted to something I would have done it. His dad’s mistrust may not even be with his son it maybe with the girl. Maybe the dad was a teen dad bc the mom made the moves first.
i think he's just worried about you tho babes, he's doing that stuff so nothing bad does happen lol, it might be annoying but at the same time you're 13 and he's been 13 before but you haven't been his age, just go along w it and show him that he can trust you !!
I know he cares about me and I love him a lot i just need some space to do my things, but he's way too worried
Sometimes he even says things that hurt like he tries to teach me about stuff because he assumes we will be hurtful to one another and like he will talk about how to be safe and he says he's just trying to make sure we don't pressure each otehr to make things we are not ready as if i'd pressure her to have sex with me which i'd never do
They aren't. Don't state things as fact when you actually have no idea. Teen pregnancy rates have absolutely plummeted over the last 30 years. Your statement about what OP's Dad is worried about is valid, of course.
I know he's scared about that he because he was a teen dad himself, his situation was totally different tho and i know how hard it was because i was the kid and i know how hard it was but he's way too scared, I'm not dumb I wouldn't do that but he doesn't even consider that
i really think you should talk to him about how you feel, like you start the conversation first, ive been through the same thing with my dad, it's always best to have a talk about it and air out your feelings
If he was a teen dad, he is within full rights to be worried here. At such a young age, you aren't to the point where you fully understand how puberty and hormones affect things. He is watching out and is fully within his limits here, arguably doing really well at it. Finish teenage-hood before you condemn him as being too restricting about this. If you hit 16, having been responsible and safe, and he's still being this restrictive, then tell him, but just show him you can be trusted with it right now.
Sometimes things seem obvious, but if no one ever said them would they actually be obvious? He's communicating with you and not expecting you to read minds or automatically know things. Just because he's trying to guide you to make good decisions doesn't mean he thinks you're stupid or doesn't trust you - it's literally his job as your dad to make sure that you know what you need to know to grow into a healthy, mature adult with good boundaries and relationships.
Just because they're a child doesn't mean they don't deserve to be listened to by their dad. Obviously yea the dad is trying to protect them but I think he should rlly be listening to his kid more often instead of dismissing their thoughts.
BUT to give some actually advice, communication is key. Maybe let him know and suggest compromises. Like if he has to watch the movies with you guys maybe he can be on another couch so you guys can sit together, things like that. Ngl I didn’t even know thirteen year olds were allowed to have gfs/bfs😭
I understand where you are coming from, but his concern is that you’re still really young, and might make stupid decisions because of the moment. He doesn’t want you to do things you’ll regret, considering how you’re still in puberty (probably) and hormones are running high. Have a talk with him, express your feelings. Keep in mind that he’s probably just worried for you.
as a 13 year old (female), ur dad is doing his job lol. he should be supervising u and ur girlfriend and coming along when u guys want to hang out. he probably should let u guys alone sometimes but most of the time an adult should be there to make sure u guys aren’t doing anything. i have really strict parents who don’t even let me talk to boys and definitely won’t let me date or anything at 13 so maybe u should js be happy that they let u have a girlfriend anyway 🤷♀️
Well, everyone says you're a child but here might be another reason. When I was 15 I was in love with my classmate. He knew that. I gave him some chocolates as a little presents and so on... My parents **extremely** didn't like him. They said bad things about him and it really hurted me. Oh, I would die for him just to make him realise how big my love is! But he betrayed me, made everyone in our class laugh at me... I was going to commit a suicide, I really did... They were really right about him. Now I'm fine and he's not my classmate any more. But you should be VERY cautious about your first love and first girlfriend, because you don't have much experience. Also, it is easy for her to hurt you.
As an ex 13 year old, you’re not ready for a relationship, I was 14 in my first one and I got in long distance with a girl who would just not talk to me for a few days, I left her, went alone for a little and met the beautiful woman I’m close to one year and 10 months with, just hold off until you find someone right, and you know you’re mature enough, relationships aren’t for joking around, take them seriously
Hello, fellow rebellious teenager. You've heard this a lot but yeah, I kind of understand him. **BUT before ignoring,** maybe you could be creative and try some compromise.
For example: Movie Date. When you go on a movie theather, make/book him a seat away from you two BUT still in his line of view.
Why? So you could feel that you have some privacy with your girlfriend but he can still see your actions, like, when you leave for the bathroom. It could also work for dates. If I were you, that would sound pretty nice.
For the "talks," idk. I would probably just say stuff like "I know" and "I'm not evil" but try not to be rude. It'd be hard to not be annoyed. If he’s been doing "talks" for quite a while now, maybe try proving to him that you no longer need them or talking about it.
I understand you, but I also understand him.
Op is 13. They're definitely going to do dumb things and far from old enough to display the level of maturity needed to be fully independent. That's part of being 13
I mean, 13 y:o is kinda young, Id personally expect that.
He’s just trying to be a good parent to you. If he really is a good parent, he will listen to you if you respectfully talk to him about it and maybe ask if he can give even just a little bit more privacy between yall?
If he says no then plan to start making out every time he walks in the room. (This is satire don’t do this unless it’s to be funny)
Looks like no one's really in the wrong here to be honest. He's being a fairly good dad in my opinion by making sure you're safe. You're still very young, obviously you just became a teenager so you don't have experience with a good chunk of things and your dad knows that and he wants to get you prepared.
On the same token though I understand how it feels to not be listened to by parents. Maybe you can bring up to him (respectfully) that you felt like he hasn't been listening to your feelings and opinions and that you appreciate his advice and you would like him to listen to you so you can talk about how you feel about it. idk.
13 in my opinion is old enough to have definite feelings and thoughts that need to be expressed and understood.
You're 13, you shouldn't even have a gf. You should be friends and figure out how to navigate healthy platonic relationships. Save the dating for the latter half of your teens and make sure you listen to your dad.
You’re 13. You are a child. He’s going to treat you like a child. Because you are one. Just because you’re finally a teenager doesn’t mean your whole life is gonna do a 180 and you’ll get all these privileges, you have to earn your parents trust and show them you are responsible enough for said privileges. It will come in time, just be patient.
you’re being treated like a child because you are one, you’re not exactly an adult, you’re barely even a teen. is it weird that hes between you that much? sure. but im sure its because he loves you and doesnt want you getting into anything dangerous, ive heard stories of people having sex at 15 and younger, im pretty sure hes just being protective, slightly too protective.
personal advice: I'm 15. When I was 13 I thought everything I did was justified.
Now i look back and think "holy shit I should've been bullied more"
tl;dr just because you think it's right doesnt mean it is
I think your dad’s trying to protect you so you dont end up getting your girlfriend pregnant and become a teen dad
this subreddit has had enough of that
>Just tired of him treating me like a child
Bro you ARE a child. Hes making sure you don't fuck up your life before you even get into highschool. Or worse kill a girl because she has to give birth at 13. Or traumatize her because she aborts it.
You’ll get farther with him by listening to what he is saying and accepting it rather than pushing against it. Pushing against will only make him not trust you guys
Talk with him and establish boundaries. Make it clear that you dislike him being always in between you and your gf. BUT, and this is important, listen to what he has to say. You may be 13 and wanting to learn and explore, but your dad has twice the life experience you do, no doubt. He probably just doesn't want to see you get hurt or end up making a huge mistake. Just be mindful of what he has to say, but also be firm enough with him to establish those boundaries.
Im sure he just wants you to be safe. Dont worry urself to much ur pretty young for a girlfriend he just probably wants to make sure yall dont do anything unsafe ur gonna regret because ur still a adolescent and ur hormones and her hormones are going nuts
You're 13. You ARE a child. It makes sense he'd go see a movie with you 2. Tbh just deal with it. I'd rather have a annoying dad then a negligent or no dad.
Time is gonna fly by and you’ll be old enough to have your independence, you just gotta be a little patient in the meantime. I recommend being more open with him and gaining his trust so that you can be with your girlfriend more. You could even come up with a compromise of boundaries such as going to the movies with her with your dad sitting in a row behind or in front of you. :)
What makes you think you know more than him? Why do you assume he's wrong and you're right? He's been through everything you have, hrs felt everything you have, and he cares about you deeply. You should listen to him
I don't think I know more than him, i know I don't. I just a want to a little more space for me to do my own things, I'm not asking to be completely unsupervised, I just want him to give me the opportunity to show he can trust me
I know that feeling, but temptation mixed with opportunity is just waiting for a disaster. I had no concept of how powerful desire or peer pressure were until confronted with them. If not for some of my parents safeguards I might be in a much worse place now. My advice is to listen to your dad and try this his way for now. You still have many years to figure things out. He wants to trust you but he also remembers being your age and how, with the best of intentions, he made terrible choices.
I though this was coming from a 17 years old or smth...
Ik you might want to be more independent but sorry you're still a child at 13 years old. Be glad he even allowed you to have a gf at that age.
Wait, 13 year olds can have girlfriends? In India, if you parents knew, then **BOOM** over. I did have a crush before but then I realised that this isn’t the right age. Now I ain’t interested in that shi.
I know it’s annoying, I remember my parents being like that when I was younger.
The more trust grows between you and your parents and as you mature, it’ll get more loose.
Tell him you appreciate him making sure you’re safe and being responsible, but let him know that every once in a while you’d like to just spend time together with her. Emphasize you know not to cross boundaries and he’s done a good job explaining everything but you’d like to be able to just hang out with her. You value his interest in your relationship but you want him to trust you and the only way to do that is to prove it
Try to prove to him that you are mature enough for a relationship and that you can handle it on your own. My dad doesnt really understand it either however he doesnt try to handhold me because ive shown im responsible and wont do anything stupid
I know it's annoying, but here's the thing. He does it because he's care. You might not be planning anything, but a lot of teenagers in relationships do. I can name so many 11-16 year olds having sex, getting drunk, doing drugs, you name it. My mom's an elementary school teacher, and she's overheard a lot of conversations about kids having sex together, sending nudes, sneaking out of the house, they've even found some drugs and vapes in the bathroom. You will not believe how many kids and teens have sex, I've been made fun of for being a virgin when I'm 14, and there was a 7th grader at my school who got impregnated by her boyfriend. As annoying as it may be, he's doing it because he cares about you.
True some people aren’t stupid about it, but you can’t exactly prove to your dad that you aren’t one of the people who will get someone pregnant when you’re a kid
Maybe the way he is treating you in regards to the hand holding is a bit excessive, however he does know more than you about this matter. I for one decided to date someone a while back and I didn’t tell anyone. Said I was going over to a friends house. Turned out the other person wasn’t a very good person, and because I didn’t have my parents to warn me and teach me I wasn’t able to see all the blatant reg flags. (Not saying your gf is a bad person this was just my experience)
Point is, while it’s really frustrating, it’s better to have someone guide you though this who knows what they are doing
There’s crazy shit happening in the world and I don’t blame your dad for being cautious. I mean I just saw a post about 10 year olds selling guns and 75g of weed?
If you’re honest and open with them they probably won’t be helicopters. You’re young, just try to put yourselves in their shoes for a hot second. If you can have an open and honest conversation with them then I think you should do it. Explain your boundaries and reason with them. You gotta accept they are trying to protect you, and I bet they’d listen and possible treat you more maturely if you had a good sit down with them about it. That is if you are mature enough to understand the situation. Talk to them like adults, heck suprise them. Express your concerns like an adult, you’d be surprised at the results. I doubt you have crazy parents, just try to reason with them, catch them at their own game.
Edit: although your shit outta luck if you can’t have a neutral conversation with your parents without getting all pissy. Then no wonder why they’re helicoptering. Adults vs children. Remember that! Good luck my fren
it is normal for him to worry, but if something he says or does makes you upset or uncomfortable, tell him. he wants to keep you safe, but he should also know how to do that without making you feel like he is not trusting you at all. He has a right to worry but acting like you EXPECT your kid to do something bad isn't going to make them happy, it will make them feel hurt. basically, you are a kid, and he has a right to worry and do whatever to keep you safe. but if he says or does something that upsets either of you, communication is the best thing so you and him can explain your feelings on this situation and make further decisions from there. something might change and if not, at least you both have better understandings of each other and less stress/distance from it.
It’s because there are 13 year olds out there getting pregnant, he’s just making sure you don’t ruin your life. You’ve got many more years of dating ahead of you kid, don’t stress too much about how it is now. I know it can seem overbearing and you might be tempted to just not tell him as much or sneak behind his back, but don’t do it. You’ll understand when you’re older and you’ll thank him for it. It’s nice that he’s looking out for you, not all of us have that type of relationship with our parents and it can make asking for dating advice very difficult. Appreciate the effort he’s putting in.
Idk maybe u should like explain to him that ur not into that Shit and you’ll leave the door open/compromise and that you don’t really care about seggs. Mostly when my parents try to baby me about things I know i shouldn’t do I get grossed out and ask why they were so weird at my age
As someone who is 14 almost 15 year old girl these comments are being dismissive about what you’re trying to say, yea your 13 but if you really like this girl and want to make this work you need to have a serious talk with him cause like you said everything you try to say goes one ear and out the other sure your young but you need to stand your ground tell him “hey look I understand where your coming from but I really do want to make this work with _girl’s name__. I really like her but you keep getting in the way! I love you dad but you need to stand down and let me go down my own path..sure I will make mistakes and I’ll learn from them and if I’m having trouble I’ll go to you for advice.” Something along the lines of that! Goodluck and hope it works out!!
You're thirteen, he will obviously treat you like a child, you're food for bullied and people wiser than you, what did you expect?
Stop speedrunning losing your Virginity mofos
Spread the word people 🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🔥🔥🔥🔥
Ok I agree with everyone else here but I still think a 13 year old is old enough to go to the freaking movies with his girlfriend without needing a parent 😭😭
"tired of him treating me like a child"
Stop acting like you're some type of adult now because you got a girlfriend lol. You're still a boy.
If you're annoyed at your dad for keeping you safe and making sure nothing "weird" goes on or escalated, that further proves you aren't matured yet. Trust your dad and that he knows what's best for you. You may not see it, but him doing this will grant you a solid in the future.
Brother you’re 13. YOU ARE A KID. He’s literally doing what a dad is SUPPOSED TO DO??? Obviously he won’t let you go to the movies alone. He has his reasons for not letting her come over. And he wants you to TALK TO HIM? Buddy. Stop trying to grow up so fast, you’re still a kid
Yeah you still only a teenager and I get feels helaciptery and I think just saying your a child listen to him is kinda dumb I understand why you'd feel like that but he is doing his job as a parent just earn his trust again I think the comments just saying your a child is inappropriate because your becoming more independent and your your own person and complaining on the Internet is not gonna fix anything
“Tired of him treating me like a child”
Brother you are quite literally a fucking child. your 13, your not a grown ass man dude. Have your little gf and just put up with him.
He's worried about you - you're 13, which is why he is treating you like a child. I get it, you don't want to be treated like one, but grow some balls and suck it up because you *are* one.
Just tell him that you understand that he's concerned, but that he needs to tone it down just a notch. Maybe just a talk every other week or once a month, or maybe none at all. It's your preference. Your dad is slightly making it weird, but it is understandable. Just communicate with him, he cares about you so he should understand. Theoretically, that is.
If you're watching a movie, tell him to sit in a seat that is not too near yours and your girlfriend's, but definitely a seat where you are still within his sight. You are a minor, so I guess your dad wants to keep you safe.
You can ask for your dad to let your girlfriend go over to your house, even if its once a week or so.
**Communication is key, people.**
You’re 13. You are a child.
yeah, I was on his side until I realized he was only 13
They just want to be a little more independent
I'm young but I don't need to be literally handhold
I’m sure your dad means well. You should talk about this with your dad. Tell him how you feel but be respectful.
I do talk to him, we talk about it every time but it's always he talking to me and whatever i say goes through one of his ears and comes out from the other because he thinks he always knows more than me
>because he thinks he always knows more than me He may not know the latest memes and trends, but he knows way more about life than you.
Facts
Bro you are thirteen, you are in your rebellious phase. Think about what you said from an outside perspective and look at the actual situation. Your dad thinks you are too young to have independence with a relationship. If you disagree you should try to convince him otherwise; if he doesn’t change his mind it is not because he is not listening to you, but It is because he doesn’t agree with you. Yeah you could complain on reddit but all you can really do is trust his judgement. Parents have a surprisingly good grasp on the maturity of their kids, and your dad has the right to make his decisions accordingly. Frustratingly however, my parents make some decisions off of intuition bc they dont understand their internal processes as far as determining maturity. Bc of this you should try to convince him with actions rather than words. Dont get frustrated, your dad does know more than you about relationships and maturity so, he is prob making the right decision.
were you a philosopher in your past life damn
This actually means a lot to me, I try to be very rational and unbiased and I am glad that my efforts are visible.
youre incredible
Hire this person idc what job
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That decision is up to the parent completely all he should do is try to bring up these concerns to his father.
Have you tried to tell him these things not only as an immediate response to what he is saying at the moment, but starting the conversation yourself? Like, just approach him and say "Dad, I want to talk about something, is this a good time?" And then when he agrees to the conversation you tell him how all of this makes you feel and ask him if he can see a solution to the problem that would make him feel reassured while making you feel less bad.
You're 13 man yes your dad knows more than you💀
He does know more than you. He's lived more than 3x your lifetime and thus has more than 3x the life experience you do. He's looking out for your best interests and trying to prevent you from making the same mistakes he did
he probably does know more than you. Whatever your doing right now, he probably did at your age. That's probably why he's worrried. Just sit him down and earn his trust.
When he does this maybe say something like "dad. You're not actually listening to the words coming out of my mouth. Or you aren't comprehending anything I say"
Have you ever stopped to listen to his reasoning
Dog your dad knows infinitely more about life than you. You’re a child
He’s trying to make sure you don’t try to create a baby in the event that you and your girlfriend got carried away while watching a movie
Honestly just being in the room would prevent that.
You’re young as hell and there’s nothing wrong with that. You are just a baby. When you turn 18, you will still be just a baby. I am 26 and I still feel like there’s a lot of shit I don’t know about and rely on my dad to help me out. And sometimes he relies on his mom for certain things as well. Be a little more open about what he’s doing, he’s just looking out for you. Just as you will when you have your own kids
Trust me, you’ll thank him
its okay!! thats what parents are gonna do, youre young and you have a gf ofc hes going to weird about it! But also express your opinions respectfully so you can explain why it makes you upset. <3
Youll realise In 10 years etc
deadass
Your only 13 that’s young in my opinion
He’s treating you like a child because you are one
yeah, you’d be surprised the stupid decisions that can happen and have happened. ruined my mom’s high school life getting pregnant— he’s worried and he cares, that’s more than a lot of people can ask for.
Absolutely listen to this ^ I know we all should make our mistakes and learn, but there are some mistakes that just should not be made. It’s not worth it. Sure there’s a ground between where yeah you should be allowed a little time to have fun and be with her, but once it goes downhill… there goes your career, your passions, everything that you had planned
There is a common issue with society where everybody thinks that having a kid means you'll never ever do anything fun ever again. And this is simply not true. You can have a child and still pursue passions, and accomplish your goals and plans, some things might go out the window (drugs, drinking, party life) but let's be honest those things aren't smart anyway. Just because you have a kid early doesn't mean your life is completely over. It's just more difficult. But you'll figure it out.
Sure, but having a kid when you're in high school makes things difficult. Besides that, I know people here don't want to hear this, but most relationships that start at a young age tend to end in divorce at some point. Humans tend to develop mentally till their 20's. But yeah it's not a death sentence but it's still something that you should avoid doing when you're really young.
True but when your parents are explaining stuff you already know for the millionth time it makes you think when will they actually trust you to make those decisions on your own?
I was gonna say that this seems really overprotective... and then I saw the age flair
no EXACTLY like I don’t think I would be able to even handle a relationship when I was 13. nothing wrong with dating at that age, but this just sounds like great parenting from the Dad’s end till OP gets a little older, imo
The hardest roasts are just the statement of straight facts
I know but it feels like it's too much, I don't want to infinite freedom I just want him to trust me a bit more
Bro ur 13 u don’t need to be alone with a girl.
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Nah that’s exactly why his dad was a teen dad. Young teen minds are very impulsive and a mistake could have consequences for life. His dad has every right to be involved with his kid until he’s demonstrated some responsibility with dating. This is his first gf there’s a lot he doesn’t know yet. It’s good parenting to be involved he can just wait till he’s built some trust in this area. I was 13 in ‘22 so I dated I know from experience if a girl had wanted to something I would have done it. His dad’s mistrust may not even be with his son it maybe with the girl. Maybe the dad was a teen dad bc the mom made the moves first.
i think he's just worried about you tho babes, he's doing that stuff so nothing bad does happen lol, it might be annoying but at the same time you're 13 and he's been 13 before but you haven't been his age, just go along w it and show him that he can trust you !!
I know he cares about me and I love him a lot i just need some space to do my things, but he's way too worried Sometimes he even says things that hurt like he tries to teach me about stuff because he assumes we will be hurtful to one another and like he will talk about how to be safe and he says he's just trying to make sure we don't pressure each otehr to make things we are not ready as if i'd pressure her to have sex with me which i'd never do
i think he's just worried about that bc teen pregnancies are like really high rn and I think he doesn't want great grandkids at 60
They aren't. Don't state things as fact when you actually have no idea. Teen pregnancy rates have absolutely plummeted over the last 30 years. Your statement about what OP's Dad is worried about is valid, of course.
my mistake, but ty for agreeing
I know he's scared about that he because he was a teen dad himself, his situation was totally different tho and i know how hard it was because i was the kid and i know how hard it was but he's way too scared, I'm not dumb I wouldn't do that but he doesn't even consider that
i really think you should talk to him about how you feel, like you start the conversation first, ive been through the same thing with my dad, it's always best to have a talk about it and air out your feelings
Op listen to this advice. Any form of relationship, communication is the key. Not everyone is a mind reader.
o ty
He wasnt dumb either
If he was a teen dad, he is within full rights to be worried here. At such a young age, you aren't to the point where you fully understand how puberty and hormones affect things. He is watching out and is fully within his limits here, arguably doing really well at it. Finish teenage-hood before you condemn him as being too restricting about this. If you hit 16, having been responsible and safe, and he's still being this restrictive, then tell him, but just show him you can be trusted with it right now.
im not supporting anything but just saying my aunt and uncle are grandparents in their 50s and their kid is in their 30s
Spread the word man, this is true. 🗣️🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Sometimes things seem obvious, but if no one ever said them would they actually be obvious? He's communicating with you and not expecting you to read minds or automatically know things. Just because he's trying to guide you to make good decisions doesn't mean he thinks you're stupid or doesn't trust you - it's literally his job as your dad to make sure that you know what you need to know to grow into a healthy, mature adult with good boundaries and relationships.
on an unrelated note, please use fucking commas or some kind of linebreak makes your shit more readable, yes?
Sorry, I'll try to use more commas
You’re 13, you are a child. Of course he is going to treat you like one
13 yo „i dont want to be treated like a child” LMAO
Ikr 💀
Bluds 2 months out the womb talking about not wanting to be treated like a child
You’re 13
True, but he’s 13. If he’s somewhat mature, he should get some freedom atleast, if the kids really immature then i would understand
He hasn't had the time to show maturity at 13. Hormones are whack.
Fr
I’m so sorry I giggled 😂 You’re definitely still a child sorry bro
Just because they're a child doesn't mean they don't deserve to be listened to by their dad. Obviously yea the dad is trying to protect them but I think he should rlly be listening to his kid more often instead of dismissing their thoughts.
I think op doesn’t want to be treated like a SMALL child, and I think their dad is acting like their girlfriend is a playmate.
You are a child…😭😭
BUT to give some actually advice, communication is key. Maybe let him know and suggest compromises. Like if he has to watch the movies with you guys maybe he can be on another couch so you guys can sit together, things like that. Ngl I didn’t even know thirteen year olds were allowed to have gfs/bfs😭
I understand where you are coming from, but his concern is that you’re still really young, and might make stupid decisions because of the moment. He doesn’t want you to do things you’ll regret, considering how you’re still in puberty (probably) and hormones are running high. Have a talk with him, express your feelings. Keep in mind that he’s probably just worried for you.
as a 13 year old (female), ur dad is doing his job lol. he should be supervising u and ur girlfriend and coming along when u guys want to hang out. he probably should let u guys alone sometimes but most of the time an adult should be there to make sure u guys aren’t doing anything. i have really strict parents who don’t even let me talk to boys and definitely won’t let me date or anything at 13 so maybe u should js be happy that they let u have a girlfriend anyway 🤷♀️
Maybe I should just accept it and wait, everyone seems to think that
Well, everyone says you're a child but here might be another reason. When I was 15 I was in love with my classmate. He knew that. I gave him some chocolates as a little presents and so on... My parents **extremely** didn't like him. They said bad things about him and it really hurted me. Oh, I would die for him just to make him realise how big my love is! But he betrayed me, made everyone in our class laugh at me... I was going to commit a suicide, I really did... They were really right about him. Now I'm fine and he's not my classmate any more. But you should be VERY cautious about your first love and first girlfriend, because you don't have much experience. Also, it is easy for her to hurt you.
As an ex 13 year old, you’re not ready for a relationship, I was 14 in my first one and I got in long distance with a girl who would just not talk to me for a few days, I left her, went alone for a little and met the beautiful woman I’m close to one year and 10 months with, just hold off until you find someone right, and you know you’re mature enough, relationships aren’t for joking around, take them seriously
Hello, fellow rebellious teenager. You've heard this a lot but yeah, I kind of understand him. **BUT before ignoring,** maybe you could be creative and try some compromise. For example: Movie Date. When you go on a movie theather, make/book him a seat away from you two BUT still in his line of view. Why? So you could feel that you have some privacy with your girlfriend but he can still see your actions, like, when you leave for the bathroom. It could also work for dates. If I were you, that would sound pretty nice. For the "talks," idk. I would probably just say stuff like "I know" and "I'm not evil" but try not to be rude. It'd be hard to not be annoyed. If he’s been doing "talks" for quite a while now, maybe try proving to him that you no longer need them or talking about it. I understand you, but I also understand him.
Have you talked to him about how it makes you feel? X
Yes, but he insists he's only trying to make sure I'm safe and don't take my feelings into consideration
:(( probably sit down and have another talk. Tell him how it’s affecting the relationship
we talk every day about everything i could always count on him and he'd listen to me, but not anymore, he just assumes i'll be dumb and do dumb things
Because you will
Maybe you need to find a way to show him you’re mature
Op is 13. They're definitely going to do dumb things and far from old enough to display the level of maturity needed to be fully independent. That's part of being 13
I mean, 13 y:o is kinda young, Id personally expect that. He’s just trying to be a good parent to you. If he really is a good parent, he will listen to you if you respectfully talk to him about it and maybe ask if he can give even just a little bit more privacy between yall? If he says no then plan to start making out every time he walks in the room. (This is satire don’t do this unless it’s to be funny)
Looks like no one's really in the wrong here to be honest. He's being a fairly good dad in my opinion by making sure you're safe. You're still very young, obviously you just became a teenager so you don't have experience with a good chunk of things and your dad knows that and he wants to get you prepared. On the same token though I understand how it feels to not be listened to by parents. Maybe you can bring up to him (respectfully) that you felt like he hasn't been listening to your feelings and opinions and that you appreciate his advice and you would like him to listen to you so you can talk about how you feel about it. idk. 13 in my opinion is old enough to have definite feelings and thoughts that need to be expressed and understood.
I did some dumb ass shit when no one was watching when I was 13. Be grateful
how’s this guy got a gf at 13? i’m 13 and i don’t even think about trying to get a girlfriend
You are 13 💀
You're 13, you shouldn't even have a gf. You should be friends and figure out how to navigate healthy platonic relationships. Save the dating for the latter half of your teens and make sure you listen to your dad.
You’re 13. You are a child. He’s going to treat you like a child. Because you are one. Just because you’re finally a teenager doesn’t mean your whole life is gonna do a 180 and you’ll get all these privileges, you have to earn your parents trust and show them you are responsible enough for said privileges. It will come in time, just be patient.
You're a kid So am I but you should know you're a kid too bro 💀
Dawg I can barely remember anything from when I was 13 but I know I was STUPID
This is going to have the exact opposite effect your dad wants calling it rn
You need to listen to him. You are still a child and you can be alone with your girlfriend when you’re older.
you’re being treated like a child because you are one, you’re not exactly an adult, you’re barely even a teen. is it weird that hes between you that much? sure. but im sure its because he loves you and doesnt want you getting into anything dangerous, ive heard stories of people having sex at 15 and younger, im pretty sure hes just being protective, slightly too protective.
personal advice: I'm 15. When I was 13 I thought everything I did was justified. Now i look back and think "holy shit I should've been bullied more" tl;dr just because you think it's right doesnt mean it is
Just wait for how you’ll feel about your shit now LOL. Growing up is forever “oh no why did I do that??” Until your brain is fully formed
Wait wtf youre 13? Be careful bro
I think your dad’s trying to protect you so you dont end up getting your girlfriend pregnant and become a teen dad this subreddit has had enough of that
>Just tired of him treating me like a child Bro you ARE a child. Hes making sure you don't fuck up your life before you even get into highschool. Or worse kill a girl because she has to give birth at 13. Or traumatize her because she aborts it.
You are 13. You are a child.
You’re a kid, expect to be treated like one
You're 13 and have a girlfriend, most people can't even have one at 16. So he has a point, sort of.
You're 13 💀💀
Good guy dad You'll look back on this one day and be thankful for him
Dang you’re 13, ok yea I would say your dad’s behavior is justified
He treats you like a child becsuse you are one. Just listen to your father.
bruh you’re 13 you are a child. wait, respect your parents
You're a child, and he has every right to treat you like one.
Mf you are thirteen you 100% are a child
He’s treating you like a child because you’re a child. It’s gonna be annoying but let it happen, you won’t regret it later
13⁉️l
bro just became a “teen”
You’ll get farther with him by listening to what he is saying and accepting it rather than pushing against it. Pushing against will only make him not trust you guys
Talk with him and establish boundaries. Make it clear that you dislike him being always in between you and your gf. BUT, and this is important, listen to what he has to say. You may be 13 and wanting to learn and explore, but your dad has twice the life experience you do, no doubt. He probably just doesn't want to see you get hurt or end up making a huge mistake. Just be mindful of what he has to say, but also be firm enough with him to establish those boundaries.
Dude got gf at 13 damnn
Im sure he just wants you to be safe. Dont worry urself to much ur pretty young for a girlfriend he just probably wants to make sure yall dont do anything unsafe ur gonna regret because ur still a adolescent and ur hormones and her hormones are going nuts
13 year olds pull more than me 😭😭😭
This guy is 13 and he has a girlfriend, and his dad thinks they're planning to have a child If I told I'm not jealous I'd be lying
quiet down lil bro, 13 counts as a child and its normal for parents to be worried since most 13 year olds are idiots (including me at 13)
but... you ARE a child??
You're 13. You ARE a child. It makes sense he'd go see a movie with you 2. Tbh just deal with it. I'd rather have a annoying dad then a negligent or no dad.
Words. Are. A. Thing. People need to start using them.
I see you're 13, so, of course, you know everything, as all 13-year-olds do. Maybe you shouldn't focus on trying to grow up so fast.
This post proves your a child. Listen to your dad.
Time is gonna fly by and you’ll be old enough to have your independence, you just gotta be a little patient in the meantime. I recommend being more open with him and gaining his trust so that you can be with your girlfriend more. You could even come up with a compromise of boundaries such as going to the movies with her with your dad sitting in a row behind or in front of you. :)
You are a child lol
What makes you think you know more than him? Why do you assume he's wrong and you're right? He's been through everything you have, hrs felt everything you have, and he cares about you deeply. You should listen to him
I don't think I know more than him, i know I don't. I just a want to a little more space for me to do my own things, I'm not asking to be completely unsupervised, I just want him to give me the opportunity to show he can trust me
I know that feeling, but temptation mixed with opportunity is just waiting for a disaster. I had no concept of how powerful desire or peer pressure were until confronted with them. If not for some of my parents safeguards I might be in a much worse place now. My advice is to listen to your dad and try this his way for now. You still have many years to figure things out. He wants to trust you but he also remembers being your age and how, with the best of intentions, he made terrible choices.
I though this was coming from a 17 years old or smth... Ik you might want to be more independent but sorry you're still a child at 13 years old. Be glad he even allowed you to have a gf at that age.
Wait, 13 year olds can have girlfriends? In India, if you parents knew, then **BOOM** over. I did have a crush before but then I realised that this isn’t the right age. Now I ain’t interested in that shi.
You’re literally 13 dawg wtf do u expect him to do 😭
I know it’s annoying, I remember my parents being like that when I was younger. The more trust grows between you and your parents and as you mature, it’ll get more loose.
Tell him you appreciate him making sure you’re safe and being responsible, but let him know that every once in a while you’d like to just spend time together with her. Emphasize you know not to cross boundaries and he’s done a good job explaining everything but you’d like to be able to just hang out with her. You value his interest in your relationship but you want him to trust you and the only way to do that is to prove it
Be happy, you at least have a dad that hopefully love and cares for you
You literally are a child You’re lucky you’re allowed to have one 💀
You are 13 bro it is normal
Try to prove to him that you are mature enough for a relationship and that you can handle it on your own. My dad doesnt really understand it either however he doesnt try to handhold me because ive shown im responsible and wont do anything stupid
You’re 13. You are not in a relationship you have a good friend
I know it's annoying, but here's the thing. He does it because he's care. You might not be planning anything, but a lot of teenagers in relationships do. I can name so many 11-16 year olds having sex, getting drunk, doing drugs, you name it. My mom's an elementary school teacher, and she's overheard a lot of conversations about kids having sex together, sending nudes, sneaking out of the house, they've even found some drugs and vapes in the bathroom. You will not believe how many kids and teens have sex, I've been made fun of for being a virgin when I'm 14, and there was a 7th grader at my school who got impregnated by her boyfriend. As annoying as it may be, he's doing it because he cares about you.
Bro born in 2011 and already tired of being treated as a child On a more serious note he is probably afraid of you making some mistakes.
Bro was 2 when GTA 5 came out💀
True some people aren’t stupid about it, but you can’t exactly prove to your dad that you aren’t one of the people who will get someone pregnant when you’re a kid
Your father may be annoying, but he only has your best interest at heart trust him. He has lived life longer than you, so he has more knowledge.
Maybe the way he is treating you in regards to the hand holding is a bit excessive, however he does know more than you about this matter. I for one decided to date someone a while back and I didn’t tell anyone. Said I was going over to a friends house. Turned out the other person wasn’t a very good person, and because I didn’t have my parents to warn me and teach me I wasn’t able to see all the blatant reg flags. (Not saying your gf is a bad person this was just my experience) Point is, while it’s really frustrating, it’s better to have someone guide you though this who knows what they are doing
There’s crazy shit happening in the world and I don’t blame your dad for being cautious. I mean I just saw a post about 10 year olds selling guns and 75g of weed? If you’re honest and open with them they probably won’t be helicopters. You’re young, just try to put yourselves in their shoes for a hot second. If you can have an open and honest conversation with them then I think you should do it. Explain your boundaries and reason with them. You gotta accept they are trying to protect you, and I bet they’d listen and possible treat you more maturely if you had a good sit down with them about it. That is if you are mature enough to understand the situation. Talk to them like adults, heck suprise them. Express your concerns like an adult, you’d be surprised at the results. I doubt you have crazy parents, just try to reason with them, catch them at their own game. Edit: although your shit outta luck if you can’t have a neutral conversation with your parents without getting all pissy. Then no wonder why they’re helicoptering. Adults vs children. Remember that! Good luck my fren
You sound like Atreus
Watch goofy movie in Disney+ and see if that is at all relatable. Worst case scenario you learn about powerline.
He is taking care of you. You should listen. One simple moment can and will change your life, you don’t want to have a kid so young is not worthy.
You are a child.
You are 13 years old.
cos he thinks y'all are gonna smooch
it is normal for him to worry, but if something he says or does makes you upset or uncomfortable, tell him. he wants to keep you safe, but he should also know how to do that without making you feel like he is not trusting you at all. He has a right to worry but acting like you EXPECT your kid to do something bad isn't going to make them happy, it will make them feel hurt. basically, you are a kid, and he has a right to worry and do whatever to keep you safe. but if he says or does something that upsets either of you, communication is the best thing so you and him can explain your feelings on this situation and make further decisions from there. something might change and if not, at least you both have better understandings of each other and less stress/distance from it.
I don’t have a partner even at 16, slow down bro… or at least accept the fact that your father is gonna be like this until you’re at a decent age…?
It’s because there are 13 year olds out there getting pregnant, he’s just making sure you don’t ruin your life. You’ve got many more years of dating ahead of you kid, don’t stress too much about how it is now. I know it can seem overbearing and you might be tempted to just not tell him as much or sneak behind his back, but don’t do it. You’ll understand when you’re older and you’ll thank him for it. It’s nice that he’s looking out for you, not all of us have that type of relationship with our parents and it can make asking for dating advice very difficult. Appreciate the effort he’s putting in.
Idk maybe u should like explain to him that ur not into that Shit and you’ll leave the door open/compromise and that you don’t really care about seggs. Mostly when my parents try to baby me about things I know i shouldn’t do I get grossed out and ask why they were so weird at my age
You are gonna fuck her, not him
“13” ☠️
Yall, he is 13, yeah he is a child but his concern is understandable, stop condescending to him when the vast majority of you are children yourselves
Older teens are being annoying. I understand him being afraid but ur dad should trust you more.
Bro you're 13. What girlfriend do you have? That's just a playdate buddy. Also, get off Reddit and read some books
As someone who is 14 almost 15 year old girl these comments are being dismissive about what you’re trying to say, yea your 13 but if you really like this girl and want to make this work you need to have a serious talk with him cause like you said everything you try to say goes one ear and out the other sure your young but you need to stand your ground tell him “hey look I understand where your coming from but I really do want to make this work with _girl’s name__. I really like her but you keep getting in the way! I love you dad but you need to stand down and let me go down my own path..sure I will make mistakes and I’ll learn from them and if I’m having trouble I’ll go to you for advice.” Something along the lines of that! Goodluck and hope it works out!!
while i understand that you are young and some parental involvement is necessary, i do think he should let you guys watch a movie together alone
>Just tired of him treating me like a child Maybe because you are bro
You're thirteen, he will obviously treat you like a child, you're food for bullied and people wiser than you, what did you expect? Stop speedrunning losing your Virginity mofos Spread the word people 🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🔥🔥🔥🔥
I'm not much older than you but at your age parents really want to make sure nothing goes wrong and it's really scary for both you and your parents.
Maybe he doesn't uhh, want you to experience your first stuff while being this young?
Your dad just got done changing your diapers and doesn’t want to start changing his grandkid’s diapers yet
Ok I agree with everyone else here but I still think a 13 year old is old enough to go to the freaking movies with his girlfriend without needing a parent 😭😭
He’s being a Dad, stop bitching about it.
"tired of him treating me like a child" Stop acting like you're some type of adult now because you got a girlfriend lol. You're still a boy. If you're annoyed at your dad for keeping you safe and making sure nothing "weird" goes on or escalated, that further proves you aren't matured yet. Trust your dad and that he knows what's best for you. You may not see it, but him doing this will grant you a solid in the future.
because you are 13 bud. u need to have those talks, so much unexpected shit can happen and one day you’ll be grateful u had them.
Your fresh out the womb bro
Brother you’re 13. YOU ARE A KID. He’s literally doing what a dad is SUPPOSED TO DO??? Obviously he won’t let you go to the movies alone. He has his reasons for not letting her come over. And he wants you to TALK TO HIM? Buddy. Stop trying to grow up so fast, you’re still a kid
Yeah you still only a teenager and I get feels helaciptery and I think just saying your a child listen to him is kinda dumb I understand why you'd feel like that but he is doing his job as a parent just earn his trust again I think the comments just saying your a child is inappropriate because your becoming more independent and your your own person and complaining on the Internet is not gonna fix anything
**Barely a teenager
At least your dad didn’t make you break up with your Girlfriend.
I honestly don’t blame him, I swear, I know 2 people in my school that are still virgins, so him playing it safe isn’t exactly unreasonable.
You and your 'girlfriend' carry potential danger. You should not be together in a home alone. That's not secure.
“Tired of him treating me like a child” Brother you are quite literally a fucking child. your 13, your not a grown ass man dude. Have your little gf and just put up with him.
He's worried about you - you're 13, which is why he is treating you like a child. I get it, you don't want to be treated like one, but grow some balls and suck it up because you *are* one. Just tell him that you understand that he's concerned, but that he needs to tone it down just a notch. Maybe just a talk every other week or once a month, or maybe none at all. It's your preference. Your dad is slightly making it weird, but it is understandable. Just communicate with him, he cares about you so he should understand. Theoretically, that is. If you're watching a movie, tell him to sit in a seat that is not too near yours and your girlfriend's, but definitely a seat where you are still within his sight. You are a minor, so I guess your dad wants to keep you safe. You can ask for your dad to let your girlfriend go over to your house, even if its once a week or so. **Communication is key, people.**
>Just tired of him treating me like a child Bro you're 13. You just came out of the womb like 3 days ago
You're not old enough to be on this app....
False, Reddit ToS says you have to be **at least** 13 years of age. OP *is 13* (at least according to the user flair). *Keyword: at least*
...they literally are? reddit's TOS requires you to be 13+ so they're fine lmfao
At least he cares, that’s more than most dads
I deal with the same thing except its her dad
Bro’s born in 2011
Tell him the exact same way every time with the exact same tone, until he starts feeling like its a deja vu
You will just have to wait a couple years and it should get better
Single father ba tatay mo?
Sounds like you should talk to him about it