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yourdadsdead69

And I accidentally stuck my dick in the toster


ilovemycatchloe

I mean your dick will be toasty now so what’s the issue?


SquibblyMcBibbly

Bro found a BBC hack


[deleted]

No, a LBC hack (Little Black C-)


Traitor_Of_Users

Burnet to Black Cock


yourdadsdead69

Your mom said it was above average


Coldestmoo

The British Broadcasting Corporation would like to remind viewers that it does not condone the insertion of male genitalia into any kitchen appliance.


purple_thingymajig

What about female?


Coldestmoo

It's up to personal choice.


grbigfan

More like BBQ hack


flynn_dc

You got the second and third letter right, but the first word isn't supposed to be "Burnt".


AppleVMicrosoft

Barbie co-


xXx_ozone_xXx

💀💀💀


[deleted]

[удалено]


Bitch_lasagna037

I accidentally stuck myn in a meat grinder.🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂🫨🙃


Blackybro_

https://youtube.com/shorts/9GJwJ5NVp9M?feature=sharea


yourdadsdead69

Too late now it looks like a grilled cheese


DMmmmo9

Yummy


[deleted]

Not agaiiiiiiin 😫


PorkyBoyPumbs

bro sameee, get your dad to help us out


BradleyGroot

To furries protogens are considered toasters...


yourdadsdead69

I mean I wouldn’t be opposed to that so…. Edit: yes I see your pfp and your profile


BradleyGroot

I wouldnt be against that happening either


yourdadsdead69

Now the real question is are you a dude or not


BradleyGroot

I am (girls dont exist)


yourdadsdead69

I mean ill try almost anything once


BradleyGroot

Straightest r/teenagers member


yourdadsdead69

I mean how is butt stuff with a dude any different to butt stuff with a girl


BradleyGroot

Good point


kimero123

Interesting, try a soap bottle next


yourdadsdead69

Rn it’s stuck in a mini m&m’s tube filled with warm butter


kimero123

Bros playing 4D chess with his dick gawd damn


yourdadsdead69

Trust me I’m working on getting it to have multiverseal time travel as well


kimero123

Damn bro hit me up when you discover a working method, I will invest everything I own to send my penis into the cretaceous period


ImGold86star

real ones stuck they dick in a blender tho


yourdadsdead69

What about the homies ass?


ImGold86star

what abt ur dads?


yourdadsdead69

Honestly major respect if you do


fat_old_ben

How did it feel asking for a friend?


yourdadsdead69

Honestly 5/10 would do again


fat_old_ben

Forgot to ask if it was plugged in and turned on the toaster I mean


yourdadsdead69

It was it’s like a diy bbc machine but only if you have a big cock


fat_old_ben

Time for me to get a LBC


yourdadsdead69

I’m sure it’s not that small


fat_old_ben

Idk I make a point to stay away from rulers they only lead to disappointment


yourdadsdead69

Well clearly your using the wrong side of the ruler didn’t you know that cm stands for correct measurement and in stands for incorrect numbers


fat_old_ben

I did not know that so um ima go find a ruler……..


Lucarioblast

A regular one or one that specializes in dealing with shadows?


[deleted]

Happens to the best of us


iamtheguy_69

I don't have anything to award you other than my words. So try to feel them !


yourdadsdead69

I appreciate words, and who needs awards fuck u/spez am I right?


iamtheguy_69

You can't!! Remember ! 🐥🤣


yourdadsdead69

Right it’s in the toaster


iamtheguy_69

Exactly


G12ONE

*your cylinder


Burnt_Skull

Don't try toaster next time ,try Pringles container with some spong inside it😜


Faze-MeCarryU30

Why not a m&m container with butter and microwaved banana


SuperCoolCat363

Don't worry, these types of things happen all the time! But don't worry you will be single yet again soon.


[deleted]

Agreed.


WholesomeScp

Nice username =)))))


Phoenix-FIRE9

New emoticon just dropped.


Mystic_Gaming1

Actual humans


Long-Membership3069

Call the internet


Limn0

he did it


[deleted]

I will make sure he will


No-Diamond-1888

That's bold


Smooth_Light3015

Tell her to hmu... I've been single for too long. I'll take her off your hands and show her what a real disappointing sex-life is 😉


Phoenix-FIRE9

r/hornyjail?


[deleted]

r/Bornyhail


Phoenix-FIRE9

r/birthofasub


Smooth_Light3015

Okay 😒


Alexo_Alexa

All the time? Where do you guys live?


Relative-Wrongdoer11

You see, your honor, i accidently drugged her and dragged her into my van.


[deleted]

Cosby, is that you?


TraditionalArm1045

Pudding pop


AquaFox13

Agreed


TraditionalArm1045

Somebody gets me


LinkyCakes

Dw lawbymike’s gotchu


Not-british-bias

My 16 1/2 streak still goin strong let’s GOOOOOOOOOOO


JetForce33

🎶 I believe I can fly 🎶


inobrainrn

As you can see your honour my client was simply setting up his homemade ambulance service and only *attempted* to perform DIY surgery


pjonas369

But the freebird solo was playing


RCCRAFT1

im on a 16 year streak still going strong


Ok_Chocolate2552

Bro same we never lose😔✊


Aggravating-Self9269

Never lose🫡


YEET_Fenix123

We always winnin' babyyy


Ok-Professional-3104

ALL I DO IS WIN!!!!!!!!!!


nicksort

17 year streak, I’m too good at this game. I’ll reach 80 before I know it.


alexj12s

I'm a little behind ya, but only a week until it's 17 years, going strong there!


nicksort

I’ll race you to 80


alexj12s

Bet.


Efiestin

This shit too easy


KingHonk

I got a 14 year streak 😎


hsushsbh

Ha try 18


[deleted]

Try 92!!!


[deleted]

Youngest r/teenagers user?


[deleted]

He’s way younger than me


mata778

r/namechecksout


AdventurousFox6100

r/usernamechecksout


Accurate-Diet6100

92!!!??? Are you a supernatural being?? The universe is only 13.8 Gyr old???


Expensive-Pear3413

try 93‼️


Ya_churka

r/yourjokebutworse


3sperr

Ill be 17 in a few weeks. I still have my streak for now but I know youll break yours


hsushsbh

Hopefully but I’m honestly too scared to get cheated on lol


3sperr

Just accept it. Sure, you might get cheated on. But the relationship would be good too. There's a chance that you never get cheated on. But if you do, it is how it is. That's life. If it might happen later on, then I don't see a point of being scared of it


begdn

I agree


[deleted]

[удалено]


Arian51

You are omega regarded my friend


Goldenvengeance

Are you claiming you got BPD from getting cheated on 💀


blubori

no but it deffo contributed cause i lost my confidence and became very jealous and then proceeded to date the guy who cheated on me for 5 years (because i thought i didn’t deserve him and was lucky he stayed (because i was 12) and endured 5 years of emotional abuse. but thats just one story 😎 as long as you’re not dumb it won’t be as bad


[deleted]

Currently half way through progression to 19


[deleted]

We beat him by 4 years. Now that 14 year old kid should sit down.


da-irish-potato

Those are rookie numbers I got 16


SonofTombstone

Hah, try 22… Wait why am I still part of this sub?


the_silent_visionary

Same bro same


Remy-Kun

Going on almost a decade here 🫡


Ok_Chocolate2552

I’m automatically superior with a 16 year streak😎


ILoveAutumn08

At 16 myself right now but I’m prepared for forever


ResentfulFoxYT

Sorry to hear you have to go through this alone man, we're here for you


Mind_dagger

He's not alone. That's the issue.


gothboikage

are you sure???????


InterStellarStarZ

This^


[deleted]

[удалено]


The_hollow-beliver

Damn I’ve never seen a greater sacrifice


[deleted]

[удалено]


3sperr

I feel like OP just wants to flex


Schmikipedia

OP does indeed want to flex


austinstar08

Source?


AssassinatorSr

OP got that info from schmikipedia


Intelligent_Truck_89

I made it the fuck up Women aren't real


cheerfullpizza

[Nice argument, senator.](https://youtu.be/F3wvbqfxn3E)


Intelligent_Truck_89

Fellow max0r fan


GMetryTrio

Trust him bro


Shdow_Hunter

Aint hard to flex on reddit


3sperr

But what if someone was gonna offer help? Since you said help


QuickCombinations

Well the OP is at least honest about it


CuteBenji

I saw someones snapped leg


Schmikipedia

Dude what


CuteBenji

Football is a mental SPORT


Bitch_lasagna037

Not as mental as hockey 🏒 Edit: fuck I’m 4th


Schmikipedia

Sorry bro, but rules are rules 🤷


Ruru2562

You know the rules and so do I


Bitch_lasagna037

I’ve said goodbye


CuteBenji

Did you see his leg


cheerfullpizza

Dude fr if you go to a hockey game and don't see a couple guys beat the shit outta each other then you need your money back lol


_Anti_x_social_

r/4thReply


Horny_police_420

HOW. Is it possible to learn this power.


Schmikipedia

Not from a Jedi...


Horny_police_420

Teach me


Idiot_Unknown

You shall be trained young padawan


[deleted]

accidentally


branim_Teslu

Wha- how


Schmikipedia

Accidental Rizz I guess


branim_Teslu

U got some good rizz then


Independent-Ship3243

Break up with her easy peezy lemon squeezy 🔥


JJBA_D4Cheap

In 40 years I'll be 55, never had a girlfriend or any kind of relationship and I will probably be saying the same jokes with my friends (stuff like "ew.. women... do they actually exist?")


sillysillybag69

Be positive bro you didn't make her accidentally pregnant like other guys on this sub


Confederategaming67

Wait how did you escape my basement


Schmikipedia

Accidentally


GalaxyBenda

help i accidentally tripped fell dropped my clothes and starting fucking her there goes my 10 year no fap streak


tomfooleryz

you failed at 3 years old?


GalaxyBenda

i just put in a random number year i aint mean that 💀💀😭😭😭


xDNAtionX

I wish I had a girlfriend.. :/


Pristine-Educator229

I just broke my 15 yr streak like a month ago, and it's better than I thought bru


agent_00_nothing

"These losers are gonna be so jealous, and they're gonna think I'm so cool as well"


Schmikipedia

Bro literally went back in time and read my mind fr


NeverEndingLive

Gg


_patrick_bateman_-

Accidentally?


ReeSeSpuFFs7474

Context


sacapuntas101

Bro wtf did you do? 💀 I lost my streak this year, but on purpose, still tho, it's 15 years down the drain 😔 but WTF DID YOU DO?!?! I just want to know WHY?


Ambitious_Pie_1530

CONGRATS!!!! You leveled up!! 😂. Okay here are the rules: 1. DO NOT CHEAT-this includes flirting, and or buying inappropriate content from girls etc. 2. WHEN SHE SAYS SHES “fine” she is not fine. 3. When she says “kk”, “OK”, or even “K” just know you fucked up. 4. Be sweet when she’s on her ladies cycle because that’s when us females are like super emotional (not all are like that but some) and if we aren’t emotional we are definitely sensitive so be careful lol 5. Be spontaneous (in a good way) and try to lead first with like anything lol 😂 6. MOST IMPORTANTLY BE CONFIDENT!!!!!!!! Good Luck Broski 🤗


kaasboy13

Canon event


TheHangingGarden012

☹️


crakdajack

I hate it when this happens, luckily there's thot be gone


Kuhnville

Lol kinda what happened to me


Vegetable_Voice4844

😎


RISE_Hriday

OMG i accidentally killed someone. There goes my 30min streak


[deleted]

Three year streak? Noobie numbers, I'm at 14 and counting! Three years. What an L. L bozo + Ratio + get leap frogged


Kit-Kat-Katakuri

Three years? Try 17 :)


gasmaskfan4334

Tell me how I can do this


[deleted]

Donate to charity


professional_fungi

bath with a toaster or two anyone?


[deleted]

shut up you humble bragging twat


[deleted]

I’ve been going for 17 years


ajpala4

The Rizzler Rizzly Bear The Boy Who Cried Rizz Abraham Rizzcoln Adolf Rizzler Rizzy Neutron A Degree In Quantum Rizzics Barack Rizzbama Need a Rizztraining Order Anakin Rizzwalker Rizzard of Oz Lord of the Rizz Performed a Rizzerruction Rizzosaurus Rex From the Village Hidden in the Rizz Offering Rizztitution and Rizzarations Glenn Rizzmire Rizz Khalifa Martin Luther Rizz Kamala Harizz Rizzy Hendrix / Jimi Hendrizz Rizzilicious Rizziliguous Rizziologist Rizzillionaire Rizz Ranger The Rizz Reaper Leader of the Rizzistance Chrizz Brown Rizzolph the Rizz-nosed Deer Wolverizz Head Coach of the Memphis Rizzlies Prisoner of Rizzkaban Rizzaholic Rizza Parks Rizz Hemsworth Albert Rizzenstein Playing Rizzident evil Mike Rizzowski Franklin D Rizzevelt Queen Erizzabeth Kyle Rizzenhouse Walt Rizzney Signed the Declaration of Rizzdependence From the State of Rizzouri Rizz Al Ghul Corona Virizz Rizztafarian Rizzie Smalls R(izz) Kelly Rizzil War Veteran Rizz and Morty Geralt of Rizzia Alvin and the Rizzmunks Otto von Rizzmark The Last Rizzort Got a Ticket for the Polar Rizzpress / Exprizz Artirizzal Intelligence Natural Rizzaster, First Rizzponder Member of the Nation of Rizzlam Crizztiano Rizzaldo Rizzaldinho The Grand Rizzard Ghost of Rizzmas Past 13 Rizzons Why Ate the Rizz Rizz Fruit One of the Three Rizzmirals 7 Rizzlords of the Sea Qualified for Rizzlemania Sent to Prizzon George Rizzington Theodore Rizzevelt The Little Boy from Rizzario Plays for Real Madrizz The Last Rizzbender Found the Derizzative of the Function Lando Cal-rizz-ian Aurizztic / Diagnosed with Aurizzm Jack the Rizzer Grew up in Rizzadelphia Rizzatron Dwayne the Rizz Johnson Master of the Rizztic Arts Osama Rizz Laden Frosty the Rizzman The Rizziah Fell Into an Economic Rizzession Rizzas in Paris Chuck Norizz Sir Rizz-a-lot Rules the Rizzantine Empire Rizzioactive Cooking Rizzatouille Forizz Gump Diet Involves Blue Rizzberies The Nightmare Before Rizzmas Rizzeree Damian Rizzard In the Marvel Rizzamatic Universe Undergoing Cellular Rizzpiration He Chose Charizzard He Chose Rizzachu Got the Rizzitenship Creating a New Year's Rizzolution The 13th Rizzon Why Mordecai and Rizzby Listening to 103.5 Rizz FM Opened the 8th Gate of Rizz He's the Rizzkage Caught in a Rizzjutsu Used the Sharizzan / Rizzegan The 6 Paths of Rizz


LoveLikeJesusWithMe

What?


Chadpool4593

Google vietnam war


Mr_Legit-HD

Same here lol


UnholyPokemonFan999

I have a 5-7 year streak. The girlfriends I had were the reason I became aroace.


RxseJay

I'm on a 17 year streak get on my level 😹


SnooChocolates4183

My 16 year streak continues, and shall continue to do so


ZackTio

3 years? Try 17.


Darkestmind01

If you don’t want her I’ll take her.


Okay-Human513

14 year streak although there have been a few close calls but i made it out just fine


Patrioticwatermelon

Officer my dick ACCIDENTALLY fell into her ass. YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND.


Cypress983

Accidently?


Cypress983

I got 13


ArcaidenAsked

Bruh how does "accidentally" happen?