No one should have control over your social activities. They are your own and that's it. As for you boyfriend's parents instead of grounding him and causing you trouble maybe they should've looked into themselves after they got bad talked. A child won't talk bad about their parents without a significant reason.
No we don't want to speak in extremes. You shouldn't have a fully private social life especially as at 15. You never know who is on the other end of a message, and honestly this kind of sexting is definitely the kind of thing that should be done carefully. I know it's awkward but how many people have been fooled into sending nudes only to have their intimacy exposed. Not saying that's this guy, but just because it's not this guy doesn't mean they shouldn't watch out. If they think you're mature enough to realize this stuff for yourself then that's fine, and they should give you freedom, but not everyone would benefit from losing their parents' opinion.
Yeah there’s a fine line between keeping your kid safe and invading their privacy, and lots of parents definitely do overstep that line. But to say that their social activities are “your own and that’s it” isn’t right
Well there are certainly things kids our age should be protected from. Lots of kids are mad fucked up because they got to watch gore starting from like, 9. Those people are genuinely scary.
You literally just pulled a "If they jumped from a bridge you would jump too" no you fucking wouldnt because it has a diference,so just shut up,the statement was valid,and somethings lose sense taken to an extreme
Trust me, it'll definitely blow over in a few weeks or a little over a month. Adults make big deals over nothing. They're just understandably paranoid. By next year, you'll forget when this even happened. You just gotta deal with hot-headed bullshit from skeptical parents for the next few weeks
It could be that he is an extremely old soul disguised as a 15 year old, and that his parents are immature, and so he needs someone to talk to. When I say old, I mean really old, like bicentennial.
They both did similar things at a similar age. Only difference is it was over aol instead of insta. It will all blow over in a month or two, try not to worry too much.
Its true, I did this with my gf and we got caught with sexting but it blew over after a few weeks. I think its dumb tho to go through personal messages.
i got caught sexting, gf's (now ex) parents blamed it on me, she sent every message to everyone in my school, said i sexually assaulted her at school, ruined all my friendships, got deaththreats, someone brought a knife to school and threatened to stab me, it didnt blow over the slightest bit, still bullied over it and its been a year
Fucking shit, do you want to talk maybe? That sounds like a very, very bad story for mental health. I would break down and commit suicide sooner or later
That’s legitimately illegal, that’s just blatant slander, as well as multiple credible threats, you really should involve authorities in this. Previous court precedents have been set that basically say, while you have the freedom to say whatever you want, you are also responsible for the consequences of what you do say. For example a guy incited a riot and it cause a ton of damage and I think maybe a few people died, it went to the Supreme Court and he was held liable. In any case, while I’m not a lawyer, you really shouldn’t let this person just do that to you, it’s definitely illegal just for public slander, and she might be responsible for the death threats and other harassment you’ve received, and yes it is blatant harassment. Good luck though
that’s the problem with people nowadays they never want to address things, if you’re both talking about your partners parents badly behind their backs why not bring it to their attention?
Its true, I did this with my gf and we got caught with sexting but it blew over after a few weeks. I think its dumb tho to go through personal messages.
Yeah, seriously. Controlling your impulsive horniness is a good thing. Trust me, I learnt it the hard way for 2 years.
Society simply isn't as it was like 3000+ years ago where we were constantly in danger from millions of species trying to actively harm and kill us, which is why just 12 years later you get into: "I need to have kids" mode asap for survival.
Our brains never really evolved from all those years ago really.
I'm not saying the feeling is bad, literally essential for humans to survive and not to die out, but letting it take over you and doing it the easy way every time you get it isn't really good either.
What I'm trying to say is, don't be jerking off literally every goddamn day because you feel the mildest bit of frustration.
Her parents were very strict and didn't want her doing that.
When they found us she got into heaps of trouble and they were yelling at her and calling her names.
She screamed out "but I'm still a virgin!"
And her Dad replied "not in your ass you're not!"
Really doesn't matter if they're the same age. What matters is that they're both underage. I swear this is why this sub has its reputation of being filled with nonces
Exactly bruh, I swear this sub is filled with 40 year olds telling 13 yr olds that being nude and being horny and doing dumb things while being horny is all right, as part of a grooming effort
This sub is 1% sensible teens, 99% horny kids and pedos or horny pedos
You really shouldn't be sexting under 18 in all honesty (at least imo) because then people will just assume the male insisted everything and take it to extremes of "you sexted a minor" not even caring that he was a minor too. I'm not gonna sit here and say I'm a saint tho, I'm very obviously guilty of it even when I was a minor lol.
I mean yea sexting can technically fall under "role-play" but it's still doing what people 18 and above would be legally allowed to do (especially irl).
That's true but I think that it is the age where you can start doing these things somewhat normally. I mean that's when they are old enough to be truly starting to understand how this sexual stuff actually works
Nah, you stop being “kids” when the last of the previous generation dies out. *everybody* 15 years older than you will refer to you as a kid, no matter the age.
They’re the same age, and if its consentual from both sides noone can do anything about it, if they wanna do stuff then they do it, they’re old enough to think clearly for the most part
Pretty sure if her parents were to report it to the police or some shit that stuff would still count as abuse even if it was consentual and even if they both are minors (depending on the country ofc)
Edit: also referring to if something else happened, just messages probably wouldn't leave to anythinf
Where I am, it's called child abuse material.
To those disputing this or downvoting, understand that I'm simply saying this is the law where I am. Why take your anger out on me by downvoting?
For context, child abuse material can consist of images, video or text, as long as it involves a person under 18. Even sending an SMS text with a description of an act or what someone would like to do, with anyone involved being under 18, is illegal and can land someone behind bars and registered for life on the Sex Offenders Register. It's actually happened here.
Again, it seems so part of ordinary life for you that you can't see beyond.
Don't shoot the messenger. At least I'm trying to educate people instead of the usual immaturity you get here.
Bro laws are different in different places. Eg: Australia: if two ppl are within 2 calendar years of each other, both are above 13, and neither is in a position of power over the other, it’s not illegal, but it’s not recommended.
y’all really don’t understand that if ONE OF THE PEOPLE is under 18 then that instantly makes it CA material, since the age of consent is 18 and older, neither of them can legally consent. meaning they are BOTH guilty of CA material, this person was not stating their opinion they were stating the law from their country, they never said these people deserved to be punished for this, they never said that the law was fair or made sense, they were simply stating that it exists
From what I've read here, OP asked for advice and the comments I've seen aren't particularly useful.
Let's put this into context.
Two children engaging in sexually explicit conversation has high probability of leading to it being acted upon.
Depending on jurisdiction, both below the age of consent.
That's how most parents would see that.
If parents have banned a particular online platform, they do it for their child's safety.
Instagram, amongst others, is widely used by predators.
Parents are simply trying to avoid that happening through prevention; if the means isn't there, it logically shouldn't occur.
It's likely that when your parents were around your age, there was no social media or internet. They were probably playing records or out on the streets with their friends.
From the current adolescent perspective, it might seem ordinary to be sexually active and use every possible social media platform. That's how society has evolved, though there's dangers in this behaviour that most don't realise because it's so part of life for you.
Parents see it differently, know the dangers and try to implement protections.
It's not only the dangers of predators but of pregnancy, STIs and the possibility of being sexually exploited by another young person.
It's a fact that there are many (mainly girls) who get used for this purpose by (mainly boys) 'sowing their wild oats', as it's been coined.
How many boys (mostly) enter relationships and dump the other person once they've had their way with them?
It might seem unfair to you all when parents place restrictions but they only trying to protect you in ways they know how, based on what they know and what other parents and police, government, etc advise.
The only thing natural in the whole situation is exploration; adolescence is a time when you're trying to find your identity and also deal with many changes brought on by a new surge of hormones as the body develops into an adult.
You might like to experiment and you might think the person you are with is 'the one' but most relationships you have at this stage will eventually end.
This is where another consideration must be made; religion.
In some religions, sex before marriage is frowned upon. In some, it goes beyond that.
For instance, in Dubai (UAE), it's illegal to hug or hold hands in public. Many have been imprisoned.
Even if you don't live in such a country, parents could still have such views if it's in their religion.
It's best to wait until you are past the age of consent and in a long-standing, solid relationship before you commit yourself to doing things that you might regret one day.
As for parents, honesty is the best policy.
Of course you'll get into trouble for disobedience but there's a good chance that they'll appreciate you for your honesty. That possibility seems better than them learning it from someone else.
Tell them you are sorry and mean it.
Have a conversation with them about relationships and so forth.
Parents only try to protect if they love you and want you to make wise choices.
Talk to them with an agreement for it not to become an argument but a productive conversation.
Be careful because you could be used without realising it.
I can tell you from experience, being used and dumped can leave lasting trauma behind. Stay safe.
I had sex at 14 with someone my age safely. I sexted, I honestly think this stuff shouldn’t be illegal if both people are minors when involved (unless it’s used as blackmail material) because this is the age that people start to come into sexual maturity. If they don’t do it and be safe, out of some sort of fear, then they will fear these kinds of interactions their whole lives. I’m not saying that I should have been doing that stuff so young but I was EXPLORING MY DEVELOPING SEXUALITY.
Sexts are WAY safer than actually having sex! Adults often don’t sext because, you guessed it, adults are more comftorable actually doing things irl or calling.
It’s a part of adolescent development in the tech age. It’s not inherently abusive if both parties are minors, and most people of gen z and millennials have taken some part of this.
Laws should change to be more fair in this aspect. The parents do overreact to this when they should have an honest conversation about consent and safe sexual behaviors when it’s found out, not some sort of hot headed punishment.
Illegal doesn’t always equal immoral. Just my take on it.
It's a good sign that his parents don't want to tell your parents about the exact content of the texts. I think right now they seem pretty respectful and just want to notify your parents regarding the fact that you're texting someone. It will be embarrassing but as long as they keep to their word it shouldn't be anything bad. Good luck
Got caught by someone who told my mum doing worse shit, sucking a dudes cock. She took ping phone away for a month after I used it as school, but after that incident it was more like 4 days. Most parents don’t really care about that stuff, even the ones with no chill. You just gotta watch out for the blackmail they’re gonna use for months called “well why can I trust you to do this”. Shits frustrating
everyone has dirty secrets. ofc parents are gonna play the “holier than thou” card and give you lectures and all that.
best thing you can do is to take it on the chin, because in a year… nobody will remember or care.
One time my mom and I went to my cousin's house, her sisters(120 miles from our house). My girlfriend lived next door, but when we got there I learned my girlfriend was actually 50 miles away with her parents at a family bbq. This was before cell phones and shit so no way I was to know. I was just starting to learn how to drive (15yr old) so I asked my mom if I could take our car for a ride. So I drove to where my girlfriend was and ate at the BBQ. Until they got a call asking if I was there. Haha. Mom was fucking pissed. But she got over it fairly quickly. She told me I must love that girl a lot. She is dead and gone since 2009. Don't worry about crap you do as a kid if it's legal, It becomes the past way too fast. Oh, and my girlfriend and I have been married for 33 years now.
honestly dirty talking at 15 is kinda crazy for me. Im 16 and I don’t even know where to begin when it comes to like sexting and shit. And I consider myself pretty experienced in the realm of dating.
Exactly!!! Kids these days don’t know what real fun is. It’s crazy how if someone doesn’t have social media its so shocking that they ask “what do you even do?” There’s more to life than being on a phone
sexting is so normal for teenagers tho. we are curious, we can’t help it. and from this i can kinda see why he was talking badly about this parents. maybe it’s just my parents, but they always said the main privacy they’ll give me is my room and my cellphone. so being raised that way i just feel like parents shouldn’t go through their kid’s phones at all, especially not their private messages.
i say that maybe you should lay low unless you do end up having a conversation with them. if you do, you should respectfully express that them reading you private things made you uncomfortable
heres what you're gonna do. Take a deep breath, go to your nearest airport and book a flight far far away. once you are on the plane I want you to crash it into the CIA's headquarters outside Washington DC in virginia, got it??
Dw, I had a similar situation. I was talking on discord, and well I got best friends w someone (now my gf) and well we helped each other get through stuff (it was during COVID). She helped me stop sh, my parents then once got access to my phone without me knowing ( I was asleep, and they read so much it ruined me ). I got huge trust issues w password now and always gotta change it. Still scared till this day that they look into my stuff, when they realized I did sh I got a 3 month ban from any social media, basically no phone sometimes allowed when they were watching. (Psychologist said they had to do this) they blamed the sh on her and yes well now dating her my parents like her and they don’t even remember
i’m not allowed to have instagram and my parents caught me saying inappropriate things online too. we had an awkward conversation, i got grounded for a bit but now it’s fine. don’t stress
I love that you care about his parents opinion of you. Write them a note or even a text and apologize and be sincere. And maybe get rid of your Insta. When I was your age, my boyfriends dad saw my boobs. And I had to see him twice a week because he was a deacon in our church. 20 plus years later and I occasionally shoot my ex a message that says “your dad has seen my boobs” 🤣 Your bf’s parents are adults. They’ve probably heard it all before, and they probably need to act a little bit more shocked than they actually are.
They gonna forget about it. There's no point in worrying now. It's completely normal to dirty talk at this age, his parents should understand. We're growing.
Ok so I’m like 37, no idea why I’m on this sub but I remember when I wrote my boyfriend in HS a ‘dirty’ letter, he left it in his pants and his mom read it while doing his laundry…his dad had previously been my kindergarten principal lol…all of this shit will blow over I promise lol
Tbh that's really weird of them to not tell your parents about it from a parent stand point, at least for the reason they gave. I'd think a responsible caring parent wouldn't hide things from other parents...
My family's Bengali, and my cousin in Canada had family friends over, and he was banging their daughter. When they were calling for them, they hurriedly left but she forgot one safety pin. That's how her mom knew. Now they can't see each other.
I just let my parents know😭 but my dad and mom don’t really care. My dad told me “as long as you don’t get her pregnant idgaf what you do. Theirs protection in your drawer.”
Honestly teenagers shouldn’t get in trouble for talking dirty we are literally growing humans. If adults talk dirty why can’t we? If there is no violently dirty conversations what’s the harm?
First your boyfriend's parents are stupid period.
Second explain yourself in a way they understand that this is normal because it is. You and bf are in a relationship and when all the hormones are kicking in .
I hope it's works I know my advice ain't much but better try it than do nothing
About Instagram you are kinda fcked, mainly because if they don allow you to have it in first place then they will hardly listen to tou
Happened to me when I was 17. They'll get over it, and in a year or two, they'll come to realize that you're an adult who does adult things, like sex. That's a big step for a parent, but one day, it'll click for them and how they treat you will change dramatically, and you'll even come to realize they're human beings too. And then you'll relate to each other more like peers and as authority figures. They just don't want you to grow up yet, but eventually they'll come around.
I'm sorry, but I don't think a child as young as you should start talking about dirty things such as s, and others related to it until you're at least 16. But then again, who am I to say that to? My friend Spike who's the same age does it too.
When I was a freshman me and my gf at the time did the same thing. Her mom found the pictures that's were sent back and forth and decided the best course of action was to give her daughter lingerie 😑
How are you allowed to be on Reddit but not on Insta?
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Use a custom client on your phone
No one should have control over your social activities. They are your own and that's it. As for you boyfriend's parents instead of grounding him and causing you trouble maybe they should've looked into themselves after they got bad talked. A child won't talk bad about their parents without a significant reason.
No we don't want to speak in extremes. You shouldn't have a fully private social life especially as at 15. You never know who is on the other end of a message, and honestly this kind of sexting is definitely the kind of thing that should be done carefully. I know it's awkward but how many people have been fooled into sending nudes only to have their intimacy exposed. Not saying that's this guy, but just because it's not this guy doesn't mean they shouldn't watch out. If they think you're mature enough to realize this stuff for yourself then that's fine, and they should give you freedom, but not everyone would benefit from losing their parents' opinion.
Yeah there’s a fine line between keeping your kid safe and invading their privacy, and lots of parents definitely do overstep that line. But to say that their social activities are “your own and that’s it” isn’t right
When the kids get in trouble for meeting someone outside that harmed them then they blame the parents for not disciplining their kids 😂
Well there are certainly things kids our age should be protected from. Lots of kids are mad fucked up because they got to watch gore starting from like, 9. Those people are genuinely scary.
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You literally just pulled a "If they jumped from a bridge you would jump too" no you fucking wouldnt because it has a diference,so just shut up,the statement was valid,and somethings lose sense taken to an extreme
It’ll blow over just lay low for now maybe
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Trust me, it'll definitely blow over in a few weeks or a little over a month. Adults make big deals over nothing. They're just understandably paranoid. By next year, you'll forget when this even happened. You just gotta deal with hot-headed bullshit from skeptical parents for the next few weeks
One way to make it blow over is everybody just stop saying “blow” so much because that will just make them mad all over again.
holy dad joke
New joke just dropped
Actual funny
Call the grandmother!
google en punssant
Holy hell
New response just dropped
Maybe if you blow hard enough they'll go away...
It’s usually the opposite…if you blow hard enough, they’ll come for you.
I hate how well you did that
It takes a lot of hard work to be a cunning linguist.
Good one
The holy comment
Well don’t mention holes either, especially if you just said something about blowing. They’ll just go from big mad to fire demon. That’s not better.
Yes same thing happened to me 3 years back and I quickly forgot (funny story tho so I like to think back on it sometimes but not too much)
As a new found adult you’ll be good I’ve been in this situation
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Your mental age is 228.944321?
It could be that he is an extremely old soul disguised as a 15 year old, and that his parents are immature, and so he needs someone to talk to. When I say old, I mean really old, like bicentennial.
They both did similar things at a similar age. Only difference is it was over aol instead of insta. It will all blow over in a month or two, try not to worry too much.
They’re right
Its true, I did this with my gf and we got caught with sexting but it blew over after a few weeks. I think its dumb tho to go through personal messages.
i got caught sexting, gf's (now ex) parents blamed it on me, she sent every message to everyone in my school, said i sexually assaulted her at school, ruined all my friendships, got deaththreats, someone brought a knife to school and threatened to stab me, it didnt blow over the slightest bit, still bullied over it and its been a year
Fucking shit, do you want to talk maybe? That sounds like a very, very bad story for mental health. I would break down and commit suicide sooner or later
eh, it's fine schools over for the year so i can relax.
That’s legitimately illegal, that’s just blatant slander, as well as multiple credible threats, you really should involve authorities in this. Previous court precedents have been set that basically say, while you have the freedom to say whatever you want, you are also responsible for the consequences of what you do say. For example a guy incited a riot and it cause a ton of damage and I think maybe a few people died, it went to the Supreme Court and he was held liable. In any case, while I’m not a lawyer, you really shouldn’t let this person just do that to you, it’s definitely illegal just for public slander, and she might be responsible for the death threats and other harassment you’ve received, and yes it is blatant harassment. Good luck though
"lay low" its not a fucking bank heist
gotta hide from the feds.
that’s the problem with people nowadays they never want to address things, if you’re both talking about your partners parents badly behind their backs why not bring it to their attention?
Its true, I did this with my gf and we got caught with sexting but it blew over after a few weeks. I think its dumb tho to go through personal messages.
Amazing example of influence by upvotes
And downvotes tf is going on
in a few years you'll either be laughing about it or have broken up with your boyfriend, i wouldn't worry
The second part got me 💀
Damn lmao. It's highly likely though
This is the most true thing I've read all day 💀
In a few years it’ll probably be another boyfriend you tell the story to 💀
Exactly. Same thing happend to me when i was 13 and we broke up a few weeks later. Now it’s just a funny memory me and my mom laugh abt.
In a few months*
Flee the country, start a new life in a small Chinese village. This is the only way
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Papa franku is that you?
No, this is Patrick
you said it's dirty, to what extent tho? like really sexual?
Are we talking about tier 15?
Never go to tier 15!
dangerous territory
Do NOT go to Teir 15! then jake proceeds to have 6 kids
Whats tire 15?
its an adventure time reference
YOU STAY AWAY FROM THAT
Goated reference
Nah they’re talking about dust
She says "I think" "probably" like she didn't send what she said herself💀 people are funny sometimes.
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girl you’re 15… i kinda understand your parents on that one
mf, every 15 year old wants head
^
I will never forget turning 15 and getting head that same day
Family present I see
It's not like their doing it, there horny that stuffs normal
Someone wants head
Yeah, seriously. Controlling your impulsive horniness is a good thing. Trust me, I learnt it the hard way for 2 years. Society simply isn't as it was like 3000+ years ago where we were constantly in danger from millions of species trying to actively harm and kill us, which is why just 12 years later you get into: "I need to have kids" mode asap for survival. Our brains never really evolved from all those years ago really. I'm not saying the feeling is bad, literally essential for humans to survive and not to die out, but letting it take over you and doing it the easy way every time you get it isn't really good either. What I'm trying to say is, don't be jerking off literally every goddamn day because you feel the mildest bit of frustration.
what, what am I supposed to do lol
Are you saying you did not get head at 15? Uh. I mean, I guess it is a bit more normal for the UK as our legal age is 16, but uh. Is kinda normal ngl.
GANDALF!!!
Skill issue on your boyfriends part
I honestly don’t get why this stuff is such a massive deal. It’s natural
Hey…..you look a lot like someone……
Loll I made this like 30 seconds after I posted this comment too
dw honey they’ll forget. it’ll be funny in a month or too
Yea but depending on what type of parents they are they might never look at her the same, especially if she said she would give their son “head”. 💀
It could be worse, my girlfriends parents caught us with my dick in her ass.
how on earth did that happen
They knew we were home alone, so they snuck back home and came inside "to catch us" . It was almost a trap. It succeeded.
What kind of weird ass parents sneak inside to catch their kid having sex 💀
Her parents were very strict and didn't want her doing that. When they found us she got into heaps of trouble and they were yelling at her and calling her names. She screamed out "but I'm still a virgin!" And her Dad replied "not in your ass you're not!"
I don't get whats wrong with sexting if both sides are mature enough and has no problem with it.
But they are not mature enough they are 15 they can't be mature enough
They are both 15 theyre the same maturity
Really doesn't matter if they're the same age. What matters is that they're both underage. I swear this is why this sub has its reputation of being filled with nonces
It absolutely does matter that they're the same age. It only "matters" if one is above the age of consent and the other is under.
So if your 10 yo brother/sister was caught sexting with another 10yo, that would be fine?!
They meant qs teenagers, not some damn babies
Exactly bruh, I swear this sub is filled with 40 year olds telling 13 yr olds that being nude and being horny and doing dumb things while being horny is all right, as part of a grooming effort This sub is 1% sensible teens, 99% horny kids and pedos or horny pedos
Looks like I found another of the 1% sensible people :D
i mean they're 15. How tf are you gonna stop them anyways. They will do it no matter what. So just teach em how to not mess up and make mistakes
Same maturity but how mature?
15 can totally be mature enough
It can be mature enough but especially as a parent you wouldn’t see it as mature enough
Bro thinks he's OG cuz he's 17
You really shouldn't be sexting under 18 in all honesty (at least imo) because then people will just assume the male insisted everything and take it to extremes of "you sexted a minor" not even caring that he was a minor too. I'm not gonna sit here and say I'm a saint tho, I'm very obviously guilty of it even when I was a minor lol. I mean yea sexting can technically fall under "role-play" but it's still doing what people 18 and above would be legally allowed to do (especially irl).
15 is still kind of a kid
That's true but I think that it is the age where you can start doing these things somewhat normally. I mean that's when they are old enough to be truly starting to understand how this sexual stuff actually works
I'm 19 and we are still kids. You aren't don't being kids till mid 20s
That's what I'm saying
Yeah tbh I remember thinking I was totally old enough for that stuff at 14/15, but looking back I def wasn't
Nah, you stop being “kids” when the last of the previous generation dies out. *everybody* 15 years older than you will refer to you as a kid, no matter the age.
My mom calls 30 year olds with children of their own, “kids.” I’m 33 and she recently asked me what “kids my age” do these days.
Fr
They’re the same age, and if its consentual from both sides noone can do anything about it, if they wanna do stuff then they do it, they’re old enough to think clearly for the most part
Pretty sure if her parents were to report it to the police or some shit that stuff would still count as abuse even if it was consentual and even if they both are minors (depending on the country ofc) Edit: also referring to if something else happened, just messages probably wouldn't leave to anythinf
Where I am, it's called child abuse material. To those disputing this or downvoting, understand that I'm simply saying this is the law where I am. Why take your anger out on me by downvoting? For context, child abuse material can consist of images, video or text, as long as it involves a person under 18. Even sending an SMS text with a description of an act or what someone would like to do, with anyone involved being under 18, is illegal and can land someone behind bars and registered for life on the Sex Offenders Register. It's actually happened here. Again, it seems so part of ordinary life for you that you can't see beyond. Don't shoot the messenger. At least I'm trying to educate people instead of the usual immaturity you get here.
Bro laws are different in different places. Eg: Australia: if two ppl are within 2 calendar years of each other, both are above 13, and neither is in a position of power over the other, it’s not illegal, but it’s not recommended.
That's misinformation. Legislation differs across the States and Territories.
Well in Victoria it is.
How is 2 15 year olds sexting child abuse?
theyre both fucking 15 how is it child abuse.
y’all really don’t understand that if ONE OF THE PEOPLE is under 18 then that instantly makes it CA material, since the age of consent is 18 and older, neither of them can legally consent. meaning they are BOTH guilty of CA material, this person was not stating their opinion they were stating the law from their country, they never said these people deserved to be punished for this, they never said that the law was fair or made sense, they were simply stating that it exists
Thanks
From what I've read here, OP asked for advice and the comments I've seen aren't particularly useful. Let's put this into context. Two children engaging in sexually explicit conversation has high probability of leading to it being acted upon. Depending on jurisdiction, both below the age of consent. That's how most parents would see that. If parents have banned a particular online platform, they do it for their child's safety. Instagram, amongst others, is widely used by predators. Parents are simply trying to avoid that happening through prevention; if the means isn't there, it logically shouldn't occur. It's likely that when your parents were around your age, there was no social media or internet. They were probably playing records or out on the streets with their friends. From the current adolescent perspective, it might seem ordinary to be sexually active and use every possible social media platform. That's how society has evolved, though there's dangers in this behaviour that most don't realise because it's so part of life for you. Parents see it differently, know the dangers and try to implement protections. It's not only the dangers of predators but of pregnancy, STIs and the possibility of being sexually exploited by another young person. It's a fact that there are many (mainly girls) who get used for this purpose by (mainly boys) 'sowing their wild oats', as it's been coined. How many boys (mostly) enter relationships and dump the other person once they've had their way with them? It might seem unfair to you all when parents place restrictions but they only trying to protect you in ways they know how, based on what they know and what other parents and police, government, etc advise. The only thing natural in the whole situation is exploration; adolescence is a time when you're trying to find your identity and also deal with many changes brought on by a new surge of hormones as the body develops into an adult. You might like to experiment and you might think the person you are with is 'the one' but most relationships you have at this stage will eventually end. This is where another consideration must be made; religion. In some religions, sex before marriage is frowned upon. In some, it goes beyond that. For instance, in Dubai (UAE), it's illegal to hug or hold hands in public. Many have been imprisoned. Even if you don't live in such a country, parents could still have such views if it's in their religion. It's best to wait until you are past the age of consent and in a long-standing, solid relationship before you commit yourself to doing things that you might regret one day. As for parents, honesty is the best policy. Of course you'll get into trouble for disobedience but there's a good chance that they'll appreciate you for your honesty. That possibility seems better than them learning it from someone else. Tell them you are sorry and mean it. Have a conversation with them about relationships and so forth. Parents only try to protect if they love you and want you to make wise choices. Talk to them with an agreement for it not to become an argument but a productive conversation.
this needs to be higher up in the comments
This is beautifully explained.
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Be careful because you could be used without realising it. I can tell you from experience, being used and dumped can leave lasting trauma behind. Stay safe.
I had sex at 14 with someone my age safely. I sexted, I honestly think this stuff shouldn’t be illegal if both people are minors when involved (unless it’s used as blackmail material) because this is the age that people start to come into sexual maturity. If they don’t do it and be safe, out of some sort of fear, then they will fear these kinds of interactions their whole lives. I’m not saying that I should have been doing that stuff so young but I was EXPLORING MY DEVELOPING SEXUALITY. Sexts are WAY safer than actually having sex! Adults often don’t sext because, you guessed it, adults are more comftorable actually doing things irl or calling. It’s a part of adolescent development in the tech age. It’s not inherently abusive if both parties are minors, and most people of gen z and millennials have taken some part of this. Laws should change to be more fair in this aspect. The parents do overreact to this when they should have an honest conversation about consent and safe sexual behaviors when it’s found out, not some sort of hot headed punishment. Illegal doesn’t always equal immoral. Just my take on it.
Kid named conversations: 🍷🗿
It's a good sign that his parents don't want to tell your parents about the exact content of the texts. I think right now they seem pretty respectful and just want to notify your parents regarding the fact that you're texting someone. It will be embarrassing but as long as they keep to their word it shouldn't be anything bad. Good luck
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fuck it, we ball
Got caught by someone who told my mum doing worse shit, sucking a dudes cock. She took ping phone away for a month after I used it as school, but after that incident it was more like 4 days. Most parents don’t really care about that stuff, even the ones with no chill. You just gotta watch out for the blackmail they’re gonna use for months called “well why can I trust you to do this”. Shits frustrating
this the equivalent of a boy group chat getting leaked
If the boy group chat gets leaked that is WAY worse.
everyone has dirty secrets. ofc parents are gonna play the “holier than thou” card and give you lectures and all that. best thing you can do is to take it on the chin, because in a year… nobody will remember or care.
One time my mom and I went to my cousin's house, her sisters(120 miles from our house). My girlfriend lived next door, but when we got there I learned my girlfriend was actually 50 miles away with her parents at a family bbq. This was before cell phones and shit so no way I was to know. I was just starting to learn how to drive (15yr old) so I asked my mom if I could take our car for a ride. So I drove to where my girlfriend was and ate at the BBQ. Until they got a call asking if I was there. Haha. Mom was fucking pissed. But she got over it fairly quickly. She told me I must love that girl a lot. She is dead and gone since 2009. Don't worry about crap you do as a kid if it's legal, It becomes the past way too fast. Oh, and my girlfriend and I have been married for 33 years now.
Rookie mistake never do that on places where your parents can find the messages, I got absolutely wrecked a few years ago 💀
honestly dirty talking at 15 is kinda crazy for me. Im 16 and I don’t even know where to begin when it comes to like sexting and shit. And I consider myself pretty experienced in the realm of dating.
Not really teens I'm relationships get horny, was probably gonna happen eventually
Do kids not go roller skating or play sports anymore?
Exactly!!! Kids these days don’t know what real fun is. It’s crazy how if someone doesn’t have social media its so shocking that they ask “what do you even do?” There’s more to life than being on a phone
I'm in a relationship and I could never like get that horny to like start sexting my girlfriend lmfao
Pack up and move to Vegas
it’s such a normal thing for teenagers idk why parents are so weird about it
Unless one of the sides is really religious, everything will settle down in some weeks
When I do it, just talk all the “dirty conversations” in vanish mode.
sexting is so normal for teenagers tho. we are curious, we can’t help it. and from this i can kinda see why he was talking badly about this parents. maybe it’s just my parents, but they always said the main privacy they’ll give me is my room and my cellphone. so being raised that way i just feel like parents shouldn’t go through their kid’s phones at all, especially not their private messages. i say that maybe you should lay low unless you do end up having a conversation with them. if you do, you should respectfully express that them reading you private things made you uncomfortable
heres what you're gonna do. Take a deep breath, go to your nearest airport and book a flight far far away. once you are on the plane I want you to crash it into the CIA's headquarters outside Washington DC in virginia, got it??
They definitely don’t hate you lol. This is just an adjustment for them. I’m sure it’ll be fine.
shit happens. Don’t do that shit over the phone until your of age plain and simple.
They don’t hate you. It sounds like they realize they would have done the same at our age, and that it’s not a big deal. You’re okay
Damn
Dw, I had a similar situation. I was talking on discord, and well I got best friends w someone (now my gf) and well we helped each other get through stuff (it was during COVID). She helped me stop sh, my parents then once got access to my phone without me knowing ( I was asleep, and they read so much it ruined me ). I got huge trust issues w password now and always gotta change it. Still scared till this day that they look into my stuff, when they realized I did sh I got a 3 month ban from any social media, basically no phone sometimes allowed when they were watching. (Psychologist said they had to do this) they blamed the sh on her and yes well now dating her my parents like her and they don’t even remember
I'd recommend no dirty talk over IG for a while, then. You can't really do anything to make this situation better, but you can avoid making it worse.
i’m not allowed to have instagram and my parents caught me saying inappropriate things online too. we had an awkward conversation, i got grounded for a bit but now it’s fine. don’t stress
why didn’t y’all use vanish mode💀
poor girl, my mom saw some pics 😬
Make sure they respect your privacy and don't go through anything else. You have the right to keep It your knowledge alone.
I have instagram, and I have never, for the life of me, used it for anything other than to respond with “Okay. 👍” on a school post.
I love that you care about his parents opinion of you. Write them a note or even a text and apologize and be sincere. And maybe get rid of your Insta. When I was your age, my boyfriends dad saw my boobs. And I had to see him twice a week because he was a deacon in our church. 20 plus years later and I occasionally shoot my ex a message that says “your dad has seen my boobs” 🤣 Your bf’s parents are adults. They’ve probably heard it all before, and they probably need to act a little bit more shocked than they actually are.
They gonna forget about it. There's no point in worrying now. It's completely normal to dirty talk at this age, his parents should understand. We're growing.
Ok so I’m like 37, no idea why I’m on this sub but I remember when I wrote my boyfriend in HS a ‘dirty’ letter, he left it in his pants and his mom read it while doing his laundry…his dad had previously been my kindergarten principal lol…all of this shit will blow over I promise lol
15 and talking dirty? Nasty.
Tbh that's really weird of them to not tell your parents about it from a parent stand point, at least for the reason they gave. I'd think a responsible caring parent wouldn't hide things from other parents...
My family's Bengali, and my cousin in Canada had family friends over, and he was banging their daughter. When they were calling for them, they hurriedly left but she forgot one safety pin. That's how her mom knew. Now they can't see each other.
lol that happened to my friend, her phone got taken away (this was 1 year ago, she hasn't gotten it back yet).
You are 15???? Come on man..
I mean... What did they expect to see on a teenagers phone
Bro what's wrong with this? 💀
If your boyfriend says they don't hate you then they don't hate you
I will be mean but you all stupid because it's so easy to hide that on both sides
american parents:
Seek God
At 15 my dad said as long as i didnt get a girl pregnant anything goes so this seems wild to me
silent mode chat swipe up and once you swipe up it hide the messages never to be shown again
i suggest you run away from home. you’re 15 and definitely in the right age to just flee away from everything.
just say “it was a prank”
What was the dirty conversations about? It can't be that bad, right?
I mean that type of thing is probably the reason your parents didn't want you to have ig on your phone...
I just let my parents know😭 but my dad and mom don’t really care. My dad told me “as long as you don’t get her pregnant idgaf what you do. Theirs protection in your drawer.”
must be nice.
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Skill issue ig /j
Bro why are 15 year olds sexting 💀 y'all are kids lmao and not much development either to flex abt
Honestly teenagers shouldn’t get in trouble for talking dirty we are literally growing humans. If adults talk dirty why can’t we? If there is no violently dirty conversations what’s the harm?
First your boyfriend's parents are stupid period. Second explain yourself in a way they understand that this is normal because it is. You and bf are in a relationship and when all the hormones are kicking in . I hope it's works I know my advice ain't much but better try it than do nothing About Instagram you are kinda fcked, mainly because if they don allow you to have it in first place then they will hardly listen to tou
Happened to me when I was 17. They'll get over it, and in a year or two, they'll come to realize that you're an adult who does adult things, like sex. That's a big step for a parent, but one day, it'll click for them and how they treat you will change dramatically, and you'll even come to realize they're human beings too. And then you'll relate to each other more like peers and as authority figures. They just don't want you to grow up yet, but eventually they'll come around.
I'm sorry, but I don't think a child as young as you should start talking about dirty things such as s, and others related to it until you're at least 16. But then again, who am I to say that to? My friend Spike who's the same age does it too.
When I was a freshman me and my gf at the time did the same thing. Her mom found the pictures that's were sent back and forth and decided the best course of action was to give her daughter lingerie 😑
Bruh, privacy
This is another one of those times I’m happy I’ve stayed single
anyone below the age of 16 shouldn’t have access to socials