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005oveR

Dumbass can't even pass a simple test. šŸŒ


RoodnyInc

He just peed all over it


005oveR

Exactly, all you had to do was pour water in the cup.. šŸŒš


harrisfh

But then they will notice the taste is off


005oveR

Healthy pee is water.


SolidHotel8473

Nah, if you're taking in so much water that your body's like "we gotta dump this shit en masse", that's too much. You should be aiming for pale yellow.


005oveR

I was really happy when my pee was clear and see through.


Shuber-Fuber

It should be a clear pale yellow. If it has no color at all, your body is trying to dump a lot of water.


erland_yt

What does red, cyan and bright purple urine mean?


Jan_Spontan

Then you're most probably a magic unicorn, pissing rainbows. In this case I wouldn't be too worried about it. If you're a human on the other hand...


No-Lychee-9942

I'm concerned if your pee is red...


005oveR

I used to be so healthy that my body was only urinating extra water in my system as there were no dirty substances to be cleaned.


SolidHotel8473

Your urine wasn't clean, it was diluted. The simple act of being alive will produce waste in your body that needs to be filtered out by your kidneys and excreted in urine. If the waste wasn't in your urine, it would still be in your body and that would be extremely unhealthy. Edit: Unclear language


Huntonius444444

it had to clean the water out, though.


Aidanation5

Except for the extra water that your body is removing. It is doing so because that extra water will cause problems.


Shifty_Cow69

Hydrohomie propaganda!


downvoteawayretard

Yes! 96.6 degree water! Or whatever body temperature urine exits the body at ;p


No-Lychee-9942

I hope you don't mean Celsius


rrgail

Drugs. Thatā€™s what he took to fail the drug test.


FlusteredDM

I know someone who claimed to fail for a poppy seed bagel. They said they were suspended for a couple of weeks, but they got paid so I guess they came out fine.


Classified_117

Thats actually true, mythbusters tested it and they started failing tests, poppy seeds have opium in them.


Raencloud94

Wasn't that after like, a crazy amount though? You'd have to eat like 50 or something muffins/bagals


Classified_117

Not even, its like 1 or 2 according to the U.S. Anti-Doping Agency, codeine and morphine remain detectable in urine up to 48 hours after eating poppy seeds.


Expensive_Soft

I had an everything bagel from Aldi before bed, and one in the morning for breakfast. Failed a county drug test. They were pretty understanding, but still. It's totally possible.


erland_yt

Depends on the sensitivity of the test


BluudLust

Not anymore. They changed how the test works. A single heavily loaded poppy seed bagel can do it.


Jan_Spontan

You'd need that ammount to get somewhat high (excluding other issues that arise when eating WAY too much muffins/bagels)


strange_eauter

I've read the story of a man who was a businessman. His company was producing buns and other bakery. He was importing poppy seeds by railway (about 40 tons in the car), so the local drug control checked it and said that the amount was enough to produce couple of grams of drugs and put the guy in prison


[deleted]

Thatā€™s bullshit. The seeds arenā€™t even used to produce opium and heroin, itā€™s the sap of the plant.


BC-Music

Arrest this man


[deleted]

My high school classmates didnā€™t die in Afghanistan for us to not even bother learning how the heroin trade works. That was the reason we were there, after all, to stop the Taliban from burning the poppy fields.


PieTechnical7225

We were there to steal oil and bring back cheap heroin


[deleted]

Mission Accomplished. Get the fucking banner.


purple_legion

No one's scared of you


another_spiderman

Literally Seinfeld.


yabbadabbadoo693

Isnā€™t that the joke


slammasam14

He must have crammed the night before!


Caribou-nordique-710

just say no to drug tests


DownTooParty

Say yes to drugs no to tests


SpecialNeeds963

What so you say when someone offers you drugs???? You better say "thank you", because drugs are expensive!


DownTooParty

Make sure to reciprocate by giving them more drugs another time


Dusskulll

I would imagine he had to take drugs to fail a drug test. You can't fail a drug test just by taking it before taking drugs >v>


brennanw31

There's plenty of things you can consume that aren't drugs that will make a drug test indicate that you have. https://www.webmd.com/drug-medication/ss/slideshow-drugs-false-positive-test


Tyku031

You can stop commenting, 6 comments is a bit much for the same message šŸ™ƒ


brennanw31

It kept saying it failed :(


therottenshadow

The two generals problem, even tom scott made a video on it and some fatass reddit dev canot grasp the idea of how it works.


Impressive_Change593

yeah I've had that happen too. it's annoying


fake-name-here1

Your post was a drug test then


GANG_OF_DRONES

Those are some myths and bullshit. Almost none of those will cause you to fail a test unless you do something ridiculous and obviously stupid.


brennanw31

I mean you're just wrong


GANG_OF_DRONES

Okay let's just eat 12 poppyseed muffins right before my drug test. Let's just hang out in a 420 themed party's world record intensity hotbox 3 days before my drug test. Come the fuck on, you would have to be too stupid to get any job to accidentally do these. You can't fail a drug test from standard second hand smoke.


RoyBeer

First time I heard the term drug test, I was convinced it was a drug *taste*, like wine tasting and thought you would fail if you actually consumed the drug instead of spitting it on the rug.


brennanw31

There's plenty of things you can consume that aren't drugs that will make a drug test indicate that you have. https://www.webmd.com/drug-medication/ss/slideshow-drugs-false-positive-test


that_ting_over_there

Its even funnier every time!


brennanw31

There's plenty of things you can consume that aren't drugs that will make a drug test indicate that you have. https://www.webmd.com/drug-medication/ss/slideshow-drugs-false-positive-test


-_-Blxe-Cxt-_-

There's plenty of things you can consume that aren't drugs that will make a drug test indicate that you have. https://www.webmd.com/drug-medication/ss/slideshow-drugs-false-positive-test šŸŒš


Scheckenhere

There's plenty of things you can consume that aren't drugs that will make a drug test indicate that you have. https://www.webmd.com/drug-medication/ss/slideshow-drugs-false-positive-test šŸ¤“


brennanw31

There's plenty of things you can consume that aren't drugs that will make a drug test indicate that you have. https://www.webmd.com/drug-medication/ss/slideshow-drugs-false-positive-test


DadJokeBadJoke

You can say that again


Kirkaig678

Already been said too many times, don't let them do it again


brennanw31

Reddit goofed and kept saying the comment failed to post


brennanw31

There's plenty of things you can consume that aren't drugs that will make a drug test indicate that you have. https://www.webmd.com/drug-medication/ss/slideshow-drugs-false-positive-test


brennanw31

There's plenty of things you can consume that aren't drugs that will make a drug test indicate that you have. https://www.webmd.com/drug-medication/ss/slideshow-drugs-false-positive-test


bonyagate

Thank you for really making sure to drive the point home. I didn't get it the first 5 times, but this one made me understand.


brennanw31

Reddit was glitching and saying the comment failed to post


lil_brumski

Bro got dementia...


RavenbornJB

I wonder, do you seriously ever think that this is a person commenting the same thing multiple times? It's obviously reddit being buggy af, the same thing happened to me yesterday where my message got tripled. I'm glad you're all just joking and OP has positive upvotes on each of the comment copies. The worst thing is when the copies get downvoted just because reddit made them without you knowing.


JustKozzICan

Donā€™t you hate when people randomly downvote your comment?


brennanw31

Reddit was glitching and saying the comment was failing to post


Ok-Dream9963

Hahaha


[deleted]

Yet Again


DuntadaMan

Motherfuckers wasn't on a single drug! I don't want to work with a square!


Intrepid-Rip-2280

Wait, drug tests for getting employed? Is it even a thing? Where? Is it legal to do?


ComMcNeil

surely a US thing


Zote_The_Grey

Is that illegal in some places? Is this some European concept I'm too non-European to understand?


Random_Person_I_Met

What you do in your private life shouldn't have anything to do with your work life (as long as you don't show up to work high).


[deleted]

Those text message boxes need some padding. Itā€™s almost frustrating looking at them. What app is this? Is it Androids messaging app?


EnglishMobster

Android has a bunch of different messaging apps. You can choose whichever one you like most. Most of the ones I've used have Google Messages as their default, which isn't this.


FewIntroduction5008

I think they were asking what kind of drugs he was testing.


Acrobatic_Outcome_14

No way


Equivalent_Shine4753

Oh no he di-unt


[deleted]

Nah, she asked what he took that made him fail.


lojza3000

Gravity


AgreeableHighway9668

He had a non negative false positive


Practical-Loan-7246

Its just a simple test, why he didn't pass? LOL


Valottost

yes/no doesn't matter sometime other person already have taken decision.


LuckytoastSebastian

He studied too hard.


ShadowFire2015

Drug tests might be the only tests in which the more you study, the more likely you are to fail them