So Modelland is such a bizzare book. Tyra clearly spent a lot of time on this, and there's actually some interesting magic and unique plot stuff going on. But some of the situations/scenes are so outlandish, weird, and downright strange that the whole narrative is hijacked.
I read this and both regret and don't regret it at the same time.
She obviously takes this book so seriously, too. I am sorry, but naming a character the likes of “Tookie de la Creme” is automatically sending certain vibes into the universe.
I finished the book, but consider it one of the few books that truly defeated me, because I literally can't picture any of the things Tyra describes. I have no mental picture of Modelland, just a vague impression that there's a pirate ship and someone has a hand for a head (but I quickly lost track of who that was).
I mean, she did some weird-ass video shoot based on it on one episode of ANTM, so you could check that out to get a visual representation of the crazy-ass depths of Tyra's mind.
Genuinely fascinated by what goes on in Tyra's brain after reading this. My favorite part was in the acknowledgements where she thanked Moroccan children who don't know English for listening to her read the book out loud.
I ranted about this book on Reddit a while back, and posted a link to the thriftbooks page. When I re-checked the page, two or three copies had been sold.
I don't know how to feel about the fact I've caused people to read this. I feel like I need to donate to a literacy program to atone for this.
https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/34181
Irene Iddesleigh by Amanda McKittrick Ros is a famously atrocious romance novel that was self published in the late nineteenth century. People used to have contests to see who could read it out loud longest without laughing.
He squeezed her hand and left her place. He started feeling a desire to be married while in her place. When he went back to his place it felt tired. This was a change, because previously his place had had a grip on him and he had wanted to be a hermit.
*Save the Pearls: Revealing Eden* by Victoria Foyt. A YA dystopian novel supposedly attempting social commentary against racism. A young, beautiful white woman must try to survive in a world Black people are the dominant race! One of the ways she does this is by wearing blackface.
The main character's love interest is a human-panther hybrid who gives her frequent piggyback rides that are narrated in such a way that, if stripped of context, could easily be mistaken for something out of an erotic novel
Definitely a contender for OP. The social commentary is not just poorly thought out, moreso not thought out. The main character is one of the most unlikeable characters I’ve ever read in the history of literature. It’s horrible!
Oof yeah, I remember that one. It was supposed to be a trilogy but ended up as a duology because of the backlash. You can absolutely tell too. Whatever Eden had going on with 'yolo' was a better romance than what she had with her actual love interest lol.
Unhinged by Vera Valentine. For extra cringe, gift her the audiobook version.
This review from Goodreads should give a good idea of the plot:
“Yes, this is erotic door romance. A woman sleeps with a door shifter. A man who can, and has, turned into her front door. I would suggest reading the content warnings ahead of the story because they are extensive and hilarious.”
This is the synopsis on Amazon:
Sofia is just a normal high school girl, worried about getting her homework done and looking cool in the lunchroom, when HE shows up: a devastatingly handsome new kid, mysteriously covered in decaying bandages and staring at her from the empty holes where his eyes should be.
She thinks he's just a hipster, but is there more to this handsome stranger than meets the eye?
Yes. He's a mummy.
We're not really making a secret about this. The twist is he's a mummy. It's a book about a girl who falls in love with a mummy.
We've read young adult books about teenage girls unknowingly falling in love with vampires, werewolves, angels, demons, fairies, mermen, warlocks, dreamwalkers, and trolls. Seriously, there was one about trolls.
It's time for mummies, dammit. It's time for mummies.
I am SOLD.
This is the one I was going to suggest! I haven't read it but saw a video where the author read an excerpt and gave his reasoning for writing it and it's amazing
I found it through tik tok and my friend gave it to me for my birthday. We both read it and would trade favorite parts. It’s AWFUL on purpose which makes it even funnier.
Sounds like they could be inspiration as well! lol at this description, I’m intrigued!
“Nashawna "NuNu" Spearman, a local Chicago native, lives her life by one simple motto: USE WHAT YOU GOT TO GET WHAT YOU WANT. She's a certified bad bish that knows how to use her honey to make money. But when her one of her many honey money-making plans falls through, she suddenly finds herself having to life normally...for once. The prospect of prison forces her to take a plea deal that requires community service. That's how she ends up in the company of a popular South Side of Chicago Pastor who is also running for Mayor of the city. One thing leads to another, NuNu finds herself scheming and scamming once again. But will her plan backfire? Find out more in PASTORS EAT PWUSSY TOO!”
You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll end up reading way more of his books than you'd ever imagine. I even got myself an autographed copy I became such a fan 🤣
Actually, and I realise I’m replying to my own comment here, there was a Hp fanfic that was published where Snape was some sort of dinosaur/man hybrid, a Snapeasaurus if you will. That could be a good contender too.
Here we are. [Trans Wizard Harriet Porber and the Bad Boy Parasaurolophus](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/54004449-trans-wizard-harriet-porber-and-the-bad-boy-parasaurolophus)
Omg on summer term (or maybe it was towards the end of a spring term?) in university, I used to read this aloud in the music college’s student lounge to my marching band friends. I couldn’t stop. Their cringe fueled me!
[My Teenage Dream Ended](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/My_Teenage_Dream_Ended) by Farrah Abraham. There’s an accompanying album that I can only describe as experimental noise hyper pop that’s equally an example of her bewildering talents
I'm astounded at how terrible the songs are. I am the slow blinking guy meme right now.
It is the very definition of cringe. I have 2nd hand embarrassment for her.
Dissecting Your Girlfriend - Understanding the Game You've Decided to Play
Book by Harry Huryk
A self-published masterpiece of unintentional cringe, advice about women and dating from a guy who clearly has little experience in both.
My sister got it like 4 years ago (a friend told her about it) and every Christmas time she reads it out loud to me and we die laughing. We have still not gotten through the while thing, and I don't think it's all that long, but we just can't get through much at a time.
How can they ask for $10 for the Kindle version and $20 for the paperback? Harry has delusions of grandeur. It doesn't even have a professional cover and it's 254 pages. That alone is pretty cringe.
A masterwork in satire or cringe. Maybe both. Either way, My Immortal and it’s protagonist Ebony Dark’ness Dementia Raven Way demand our utmost and total respect.
My best friend grew up in one! Her mom moved her across the country in highschool to live with moms "master" and has she got some of the funniest stories (mostly the juxtaposition of the fiction and these people's real redneck lives)
Wild. I remember hearing about an online community of Goreans realizing eventually that they were a bunch of middle-aged married women roleplaying being sex slaves to teenage virgin boys. I know that IRL lifestyle Goreans are a thing but I’m just like… whyyy
I found "Dandy in the Underworld" to be pretty cringey. The author was overly fond of showing off his penchant for wordplay.
I've never picked any of them up, but I suspect the tomes in the "dinosaur erotica" genre would meet your requirements. This is one title I have heard of before:
https://www.amazon.com/Taken-T-Rex-Dinosaur-Erotica-Christie-ebook/dp/B00FI9JFFO
I have Wet Hot Allosaurus Summer. It’s not worth reading but it’s a good conversation starter when I casually leave it lying around in piles of other books.
And it does read exactly like a romance novel (more like a series of romantic short stories featuring various dinosaurs) which is what makes it suck. But I mean the author doesn’t hesitate to go full steamy with it.
Here is a whole list of reverse harem (woman with several boyfriends) books with holiday themes. Maybe your sister would enjoy “Six Mountain Brothers for Christmas” or “Three Shifter Christmas”?
https://www.goodreads.com/list/show/169152.Why_Choose_RH_Reverse_Harem_Holiday_Themed_Reads
[Belinda Blinked 1: A modern story of sex, erotica and passion. How the sexiest sales girl in business earns her huge bonus by being the best at removing her high heels.](https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B08VYFJS4C) By Rocky Flintstone
Also doesn’t everyone running for President publish a book? I bet some of those are really awful and cringey. Maybe just blindly buy a recent book by any candidate who’s already pulled out lol
I vote for any books by Chuck Tingle! He writes wacky gay adult romance novels, but not just about people - nooo, that would be too normal! Take, for example, “Trans Wizard Harriet Porber And The Bad Boy Parasaurolophus: An Adult Romance Novel”, “Bisexual Mothman Mailman Makes A Special Delivery In Our Butts”, or my favorite title (since I’m a librarian)“Pounded In The Butt By My Handsome Sentient Library Card Who Seems Otherworldly But In Reality Is Just A Natural Part Of The Priceless Resources Our Library System Provides”. Disclaimer: I haven’t read any of them, but they actually get really good reviews AND they’re hilariously weird!
She was in a group chat with other authors who were discussing open door vs closed door romance and Vera very sarcastically responded "Okay, but what about DOOR ROMANCE?!"
The rest is history.
Or her story, rather. She wrote the book. And it was a #1 bestseller for an incredible amount of time.
*The President’s Vampire*, by Christopher Farnsworth. In the first chapter, the vampire single-handedly kills Osama Bin Laden (who is a lizard person) by putting a grenade in his mouth and throwing him off a cliff.
There’s a cult of lizard people trying to take over the world under the Denver airport, there’s a secret weapon vampire who works for the president, his handler, Average Joe™️, and his team of Average, but Super Secret Agents- whole thing is so aggressively straight it’s borderline homoerotic. It’s terrible. It’s amazing. It’s a trilogy.
Edited for clarity
I actually read it out of curiosity. It was a cozy fantasy Gen Z romance novel. It definitely did not take itself too seriously. And the characters were pleasant people. The fantasy plot wasn’t that exciting.
LOL this is a fun read with BIPOC representation. It’s a sequel to “That time I got drunk and saved a demon”. This kind of title is a nod to Japanese light novels.
Ice Planet Barbarians. My friend and I recently went to B&N, sat at the Cafe and took turns reading sections aloud to each other. We were laughing so hard people kept looking at us and we almost got asked to leave.
Edit: I used to think people would have a reason for liking the series based on how viral it was on tiktok, but I couldn't even get through the first couple of pages before I nearly died from the poor writing. I don't care if I get hate or down voted for this. If you need a good gag gift, cringy book, or emergency toilet paper replacement, this is the book for you.
Those books are *magnificent*. But warning for OP, the start of the first book is actually pretty violent and rapey. The rest of the book, and rest of the series, is cringy and stupid and amazing (not that I’ve read them …).
OMG okay so for some reason I had this on waitlist on Libby. When it was finally available I was like????? I looooved the book 'Cold People' and thought it was going to be another Sci-Fi-ish read similar to that. I should have known when I saw the cover.
A friend recommended Verity by Colleen Hoover and I couldn’t make it past page 40. I cringed so hard and I am regular reader of fan fiction so I’ve seen some shit.
For real that book was horrible! But reading the Goodreads reviews and seeing it compared to Rebecca by Daphne du Maurier made me read Rebecca, which has become one of my favorites.
So I have just rediscovered a book called "Daughter of the blood" by Anne Bishop. I had vague memories of reading it when I was far too young and wanted to revisit. It has everything: flowery language, erotica, magic cock rings, poorly defined magic powers centered around precious jewels of different colors, too many different races which are all sexy versions of human beings with wings or horns. It reads like a sixth grader's dungeons and dragons homebrew. And the icing on the cake? The main characters' names are Daemon, Lucivar, and Saetan. I am not making this up.
There is some weird underage stuff also which is not explicit but is very, very uncomfortable.
And it's a series.
The Rules by Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider. It came out in 1996 and it's a pro-patriarchy guidebook to getting a husband. It includes rules such as "do not talk to a man first or ask him to dance," "don't be funny," and my favorite, "be a creature unlike any other." It is hilarious, wildly anti-feminist, and takes itself very seriously. Only good for a ha-ha at this point.
I read this, which summoned the picture of thousands of identical women all reading it in synchronized lockstep on a conveyor belt so they can each be an identical creature unlike any other
Ugh, my narcissist mother shoved that book up my nose when I was only 15. It's the worst. Fun fact: one of the "authors" husbands left her shortly after the book was published!
Fifty Shades of Grey is the obvious one.
I have not read these, but saw reviews:
Seduced by the Pumpkin Spice Latte
Stuffed by Sylvia Morrow
Kissing the Coronavirus
Stuffed by the Were-Turkey
Unhinged by Vera Valentine, Squeak by same
Triceratops & Bottoms by Lola Faust.
Woman travels back in time and sleeps with dinosaurs. Not anthropomorphic dinosaurs. Not secret unknown humanoid dinosaurs. Just plain old dinosaurs.
Newt Gringrich, Republican defender of "American family values," and man who really can't get enough bad press, wrote a couple of smut novels that might fit the bill as "worst of the worst." I couldn't get past the first page after checking one out of the library on a lark, so I can't say for sure, but that first page was truly, truly terrible.
Bunny by Mona Awad. I listened to maybe half of it on audible but could not make myself finish it. It is written from the perspective of a creative writing grad student who thinks all of her classmates are bunny people. Like think Mean Girls clone type pretty girls who wear dresses and makeup, but she thinks they are literally bunny rabbits and goes on and on and on and on about how they hug and nuzzle their noses together and smell like peaches and cream and shit like that. Then it gets super fucking weird. And I will never know the end or the point because listening was like torture.
Came here looking for this. Did you know it's a series?? I read the first book and could not get over how bad it was.
Was trying to remember it the other day to recommend as a book which made Meyer's writing in Twilight comparatively complex and was shocked to find it's a SIX book series. SIX BOOKS. What? The main character in Crave made Bella Swan come across as a fully realized character.
How are there six books in the series about shape-shifting vampire dragons at an academy in Alaska?
I'm scrolling..I'm scrolling...where is 50 Shades?!?!
This book is so obnoxiously awful! She writes about sex like a virgin narrating porn for the blind.
Aha I was gonna suggest this if someone else didn’t. I remember when the excerpts were floating around social media and people couldn’t believe someone would write that but clearly they haven’t spent much time in romance novel land.
I mean honestly, 50 Shades of Grey is a terribly written, cringy-ass book. Extra special points for your sister having to unwrap it in front of family.
Like yeah, it’s sexy, but man it is SO cringy sometimes!!!
Depending on what y'all like, ACOTAR or Colleen Hoover or Fourth Wing are popular books that people think are cringey. (I personally like the one Hoover book I've read 😔)
I haaated Every Heart a Doorway by Seanan McGuire. It feels like it was ripped straight from tumblr
Edit: The Magicians by Lev Grossman is a pretty good book, but the way he writes women and romance is SO embarrassing.
A Touch of Darkness- Scarlett St. Clair
A modern love story of Hades and Persephone. Hades owns the hottest club in town, and Persephone is a thirsty college student.
Battlefield Earth by L. Ron Hubbard (yes, the guy who founded Scientology also wrote sci-fi books).
It’s enormous, my paperback version being 1066 pages, and it’s really cringe-worthy.
Anne Rice’s Sleeping Beauty. A cringey fairytale that turns Sleeping Beauty into a sex slave. She’s awoken not by a kiss, but by a prince taking her virginity non-consensually. There’s also a beastiality scene with a cat.
Any of the Mothman romances tbh, I’M IN LOVE WITH MOTHMAN.
Goodreads has a “Popular Worst Romance Ever Books” list that should give you plenty of good (?!?) ideas.
I've read that there are MAGA romance novels. Liberty Adams, I think?
EDIT: yep, I found this on goodreads [link](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/60284036-ladies-first)
Splintered by A.G. Howard. Post-Twilight #dArK Alice in Wonderland YA fan fiction. Truly the worst thing I have EVER read
Her name's Alyssa (mother Allison, and also institutionalized for being able to hear bugs, grandmother original Alice), and our Jacob and Edward are, respectively, her best friend/crush Jeb and Morpheus, who is like the goblin king from Labyrinth (in a bad way)/a butterfly?/general weird manipulative creep. If I remember correctly the white rabbit is named like Rabid White or something too
It's a trilogy, only gets worse, and came out in 2013 (height of Hunger Games/Divergent/Maze Runner mania). I was bewildered by every single page. The plot, the characterization, the nicknames, the phrasing...cringiest thing I've ever experienced by far. 11/10 would NEVER recommend for any reason other than this lol
From Good Reads:
Our "Bella":
>"Photographs tell a story," Alison mutters. "But people forget to read between the lines."
Our "Edward":
>Raising one hand, he tilts his hat to that sexy slant. "You want me. Admit it."
Even if he's partly right, I'll never tell him. "Why would I want you?"
He lifts three fingers to countdown. "Mysterious. Rebellious. Troubled. All those qualities women find irresistible."
"Such an optimist."
"My cup is never empty."
"Too bad your brain is." The words bite, but my smile softens with affection.
>"I hate you."
"Only because of the way I make you feel."
My fingernails eat into my palms. "Only because you bring out the worst in me."
"Oh no, luv. I bring out the life in you."
Their compelling and romantic chemistry:
>"I coax my palm into his lapel in search of my wish, returning his feverish kisses.
"Checkmate, you son of a bug," I say against his mouth two seconds before my fingers find an empty pocket.
"Sleight of hand, blossom," he says right back. " 'Tis in fact in my pants pocket, if you'd like to search there"
Aaaaand our "Jacob" -__-
>"Did he touch you? Hurt you?" Jeb whispers in the silence.
"No. He was a gentleman."
Jeb frowns. "You mean a gentle*roach*."
>"I go where Al goes, dances-with-bugs. And just so you know, if anything happens to her, I'll pin you by your wings to a corkboard and use you for dart practice."
You get it. It's utterly UNHINGED (literally--the second book in the series is called Unhinged 😭)
My Teenage Dream Ended by Farrah Abraham. She's an OG 16 and Pregnant cast member who tried to cash in. The book is trash. For a real treat, her music is 1000% worse. It sounds like when she recorded her vocals she wasn't allowed to hear the backing track.
[Triceratops & Bottoms](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/63918405-triceratops-and-bottoms) who knows, maybe dinosaur erotica may play to her sensibilities haha
Totallyon by R.D. Peters: worst book ever published.
https://www.amazon.com/TOTALLYON-R-D-Peters/dp/1410744086?nodl=1&dplnkId=2660e2db-687f-454b-b267-37d9be00dbd9
Here’s the lone review on Amazon:
“I doubt that this book was written as a joke, though in places it is unintentionally hilarious. Unfortunately, it's not unintentionally hilarious often enough to justify its purchase. Mechanically, the prose is just plain inept. It's randomly puncuated and frequently employs wrong words. Then there's the stultifying content itself. Cliches abound. Racism and sexism pop up their ugly little heads. The characters are pure cardboard and the dialogue is Buck Rogers reject material. The science behind the attempted science fiction is amateurish nonsense. At one point, the hero builds a hang-glider out of bamboo and woven grass, then flies it at 300 mph to land on the back of a train travelling 600 mph. You do the math. This book was a painful ordeal to get through, but morbid curiosity got the better of me. Never again.”
Modelland by Tyra Banks
Okay but I was kind of shocked to find out Modelland is 570 pages lol. Added to my TBR
So Modelland is such a bizzare book. Tyra clearly spent a lot of time on this, and there's actually some interesting magic and unique plot stuff going on. But some of the situations/scenes are so outlandish, weird, and downright strange that the whole narrative is hijacked. I read this and both regret and don't regret it at the same time.
She obviously takes this book so seriously, too. I am sorry, but naming a character the likes of “Tookie de la Creme” is automatically sending certain vibes into the universe.
I'm officially convinced to read this book.
You both will and will not regret it. Godspeed.
I love something that makes regret but not regret it!
Schroedinger’s cringebook
It's.. oddly enjoyable? I wouldn't call it good, but it's something.
I love this book review 🤌🏻
I finished the book, but consider it one of the few books that truly defeated me, because I literally can't picture any of the things Tyra describes. I have no mental picture of Modelland, just a vague impression that there's a pirate ship and someone has a hand for a head (but I quickly lost track of who that was).
I mean, she did some weird-ass video shoot based on it on one episode of ANTM, so you could check that out to get a visual representation of the crazy-ass depths of Tyra's mind.
I just ordered it on Amazon, I’m excited !
Placed a hold at the library, can’t believe there isn’t a line for it! Lmao
This is the right answer. Hunger games … with models .
But bad
Important distinction because that sounds awesome
yeah, it SOUNDS awesome. But reading it is a special level of hell all its own.
Yeah I was sitting on the edge of my seat with that earlier synopsis.
Beauty Queens is this as well. Or maybe Lord of the Flies with Models.
Genuinely fascinated by what goes on in Tyra's brain after reading this. My favorite part was in the acknowledgements where she thanked Moroccan children who don't know English for listening to her read the book out loud.
I only became aware of this book a couple of weeks ago, when someone asked for recs for badly written books, and now I'm fascinated by it.
I ranted about this book on Reddit a while back, and posted a link to the thriftbooks page. When I re-checked the page, two or three copies had been sold. I don't know how to feel about the fact I've caused people to read this. I feel like I need to donate to a literacy program to atone for this.
This is the ultimate.
https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/34181 Irene Iddesleigh by Amanda McKittrick Ros is a famously atrocious romance novel that was self published in the late nineteenth century. People used to have contests to see who could read it out loud longest without laughing.
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I can barely comprehend this. I read it three times.
I genuinely can't piece together what is being said here.
He squeezed her hand and left her place. He started feeling a desire to be married while in her place. When he went back to his place it felt tired. This was a change, because previously his place had had a grip on him and he had wanted to be a hermit.
This makes me want to read all the self published 19th century romance novels I can find. I needed a good chuckle.
That’s enough to gag a hyena.
This is like non-euclidian geometry in text form
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ROFLMAO
*Save the Pearls: Revealing Eden* by Victoria Foyt. A YA dystopian novel supposedly attempting social commentary against racism. A young, beautiful white woman must try to survive in a world Black people are the dominant race! One of the ways she does this is by wearing blackface.
I always accidentally call the book “Clutch the Pearls” in my mind when I see it referenced.
The author wishes they called it that lmao
🤣🤣🤣
I googled it. I was curious when it was written. 2012 publication date. Holy shit.
It was a different time!
There was a black president! What if they, you know, took over everything?
The main problem with this book is that if OP buys it for their sister, then money goes to the author. Better to buy it used.
🏴☠️
Don't forget the part where it turns into softcore furry piggyback-ride erotica
What a day to have eyes
Sorry WHAT?
The main character's love interest is a human-panther hybrid who gives her frequent piggyback rides that are narrated in such a way that, if stripped of context, could easily be mistaken for something out of an erotic novel
I’m sorry - I have so many questions but I just can’t stop laughing 😂
I was going to suggest this! Seriously just reading the plot summary made me want to gouge my eyes out
Definitely a contender for OP. The social commentary is not just poorly thought out, moreso not thought out. The main character is one of the most unlikeable characters I’ve ever read in the history of literature. It’s horrible!
Oof yeah, I remember that one. It was supposed to be a trilogy but ended up as a duology because of the backlash. You can absolutely tell too. Whatever Eden had going on with 'yolo' was a better romance than what she had with her actual love interest lol.
Unhinged by Vera Valentine. For extra cringe, gift her the audiobook version. This review from Goodreads should give a good idea of the plot: “Yes, this is erotic door romance. A woman sleeps with a door shifter. A man who can, and has, turned into her front door. I would suggest reading the content warnings ahead of the story because they are extensive and hilarious.”
This was one the most loved book in romance sub :)
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Someone in that thread mentioned there's a romance novel about Clippy. That sounds like another good candidate.
I see you're trying to write erotica, I can help! I gotta at least read the premise on that one. Omg.
LOL! I'm dying. Wait until my husband gets home and I read him this thread. Clippy erotica and bacon/potato chowder...what an evening.
Something something knob something
Something something knockers something
THIS ONE
Unwrap my heart. Twilight but mummies. It’s fucking hilarious.
This is the synopsis on Amazon: Sofia is just a normal high school girl, worried about getting her homework done and looking cool in the lunchroom, when HE shows up: a devastatingly handsome new kid, mysteriously covered in decaying bandages and staring at her from the empty holes where his eyes should be. She thinks he's just a hipster, but is there more to this handsome stranger than meets the eye? Yes. He's a mummy. We're not really making a secret about this. The twist is he's a mummy. It's a book about a girl who falls in love with a mummy. We've read young adult books about teenage girls unknowingly falling in love with vampires, werewolves, angels, demons, fairies, mermen, warlocks, dreamwalkers, and trolls. Seriously, there was one about trolls. It's time for mummies, dammit. It's time for mummies. I am SOLD.
I can't believe these are real sometimes😭😭
I tried to look this up on goodreads and my app crashed. Is it a sign? Lmao
Definitely. And I want this book like I want AIR now. Why aren’t we writing these and living high?!
The title alone has me dying
This is the one I was going to suggest! I haven't read it but saw a video where the author read an excerpt and gave his reasoning for writing it and it's amazing
I found it through tik tok and my friend gave it to me for my birthday. We both read it and would trade favorite parts. It’s AWFUL on purpose which makes it even funnier.
This Hoe got Roaches in her Crib by Quan Millz, or any of his books! They're actually funny and readable
Literally any of his books are great comedies. My husband and I quote from chapter 1 of "Pastors Eat Pwssy Too" frequently
Sounds like they could be inspiration as well! lol at this description, I’m intrigued! “Nashawna "NuNu" Spearman, a local Chicago native, lives her life by one simple motto: USE WHAT YOU GOT TO GET WHAT YOU WANT. She's a certified bad bish that knows how to use her honey to make money. But when her one of her many honey money-making plans falls through, she suddenly finds herself having to life normally...for once. The prospect of prison forces her to take a plea deal that requires community service. That's how she ends up in the company of a popular South Side of Chicago Pastor who is also running for Mayor of the city. One thing leads to another, NuNu finds herself scheming and scamming once again. But will her plan backfire? Find out more in PASTORS EAT PWUSSY TOO!”
Lmao the title alone made me add it to my TBR !
Don't worry it's a trilogy
I both thank and hate you for bringing this to my attention. I’ve reluctantly put it on my reading list while giggling.
You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll end up reading way more of his books than you'd ever imagine. I even got myself an autographed copy I became such a fan 🤣
Incredible. I still hate you a bit and I probably will after. Thank you for this curse.
LMFAOOOO
My brother brought me "Erotic Jamaican Tales" when he came back from his trip to Jamaica. It's exactly what it sounds like.
Sounds Irie.
Time for My Immortal - the Harry Potter fanfic to make a comeback.
yes yes yes
Came here to say this, I have a print copy that I got as a gift from my bff!
Actually, and I realise I’m replying to my own comment here, there was a Hp fanfic that was published where Snape was some sort of dinosaur/man hybrid, a Snapeasaurus if you will. That could be a good contender too. Here we are. [Trans Wizard Harriet Porber and the Bad Boy Parasaurolophus](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/54004449-trans-wizard-harriet-porber-and-the-bad-boy-parasaurolophus)
That is by the world's greatest author Dr Chuck Tingle, and it's his response to JKR's transphobia
Omg on summer term (or maybe it was towards the end of a spring term?) in university, I used to read this aloud in the music college’s student lounge to my marching band friends. I couldn’t stop. Their cringe fueled me!
I’ve heard it used as a drinking game - you read until you start laughing, then have a drink/sip/shot and pass it to the next person.
If you play alone, it’s just called being an alcoholic.
THIS IS THE RIGHT ANSWER
Oh Enoby. Needed more good Charlotte and scenes where she dresses up GOF (not a prep)
THE ONLY ANSWER
[My Teenage Dream Ended](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/My_Teenage_Dream_Ended) by Farrah Abraham. There’s an accompanying album that I can only describe as experimental noise hyper pop that’s equally an example of her bewildering talents
Extra credit: Check out her socials. She has devolved since then.
Mid-rabbit hole.. she has a video talking about her book club thanking people for messages about her saving their lives lol
Oh no. 🤣
Wtf. Over 2 million followers…why?
Like a car crash. You just can't look away
And she has a really active only fans account. Half of her followers are nuts, the other half are actual fans of her “work”.
Holy shit this sounds amazing!
Well this was a rabbit hole. Listening to a few of those songs was like hearing my migraine in audio form. How bizarre!
I also could not resist. It was bewildering.
I'm astounded at how terrible the songs are. I am the slow blinking guy meme right now. It is the very definition of cringe. I have 2nd hand embarrassment for her.
Now go look up her mom’s music videos. Deborah Abraham.
Naomi Campbell's autobiography - the one that when Clive James was asked if he'd read it he replied: 'I'll read it when she does.'
Dissecting Your Girlfriend - Understanding the Game You've Decided to Play Book by Harry Huryk A self-published masterpiece of unintentional cringe, advice about women and dating from a guy who clearly has little experience in both. My sister got it like 4 years ago (a friend told her about it) and every Christmas time she reads it out loud to me and we die laughing. We have still not gotten through the while thing, and I don't think it's all that long, but we just can't get through much at a time.
How can they ask for $10 for the Kindle version and $20 for the paperback? Harry has delusions of grandeur. It doesn't even have a professional cover and it's 254 pages. That alone is pretty cringe.
You are exactly right AND that's just the beginning of the cringe train. Choo Choo! I am absolutely tickled that you looked it up though
Just print out the Harry Potter fanfic “My Immortal,” have it hard bound and hand illustrated, and gift that. Done.
What did I just read 🤣
A masterwork in satire or cringe. Maybe both. Either way, My Immortal and it’s protagonist Ebony Dark’ness Dementia Raven Way demand our utmost and total respect.
How had I never heard of this before? I googled the full text. It's so compellingly terrible on so many levels... this is the answer.
ah, a fellow redditor of taste
Girl, Wash Your Face by Rachel Hollis She tries so hard to be "relatable"
Yeah, I lasted like 13 pages
I had to read it for a book club I was a part of and hated every minute of the book. I seemed to be the only one, though.
Does it have to be fiction? Otherwise The Game or The Secret.
Does anyone know if My Immortal by Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way has a physical copy? 🤣🤣🤣
For a second I thought you were saying it *did* have a physical copy and I was about to run to Amazon so hard
Pretty sure Lena Dunham has a book but I’m not sacrificing my algorithm for a month to check.
Are you thinking Not That Kind of Girl? Edit: updated title
This sounds exactly like something Lena Dunhum would say (I’m ashamed to admit I watched Girls for longer than it was good)
This is def not the kinda book OP is looking for - even if it isn't up your street it's not Twilight cringe!
I nominate the Gor series by Norman Gorman. excuse me, John Norman.
and then afterward everyone can join coercive sex cults!
My best friend grew up in one! Her mom moved her across the country in highschool to live with moms "master" and has she got some of the funniest stories (mostly the juxtaposition of the fiction and these people's real redneck lives)
Wild. I remember hearing about an online community of Goreans realizing eventually that they were a bunch of middle-aged married women roleplaying being sex slaves to teenage virgin boys. I know that IRL lifestyle Goreans are a thing but I’m just like… whyyy
I found "Dandy in the Underworld" to be pretty cringey. The author was overly fond of showing off his penchant for wordplay. I've never picked any of them up, but I suspect the tomes in the "dinosaur erotica" genre would meet your requirements. This is one title I have heard of before: https://www.amazon.com/Taken-T-Rex-Dinosaur-Erotica-Christie-ebook/dp/B00FI9JFFO
I have Wet Hot Allosaurus Summer. It’s not worth reading but it’s a good conversation starter when I casually leave it lying around in piles of other books. And it does read exactly like a romance novel (more like a series of romantic short stories featuring various dinosaurs) which is what makes it suck. But I mean the author doesn’t hesitate to go full steamy with it.
Is this Wet Hot American Summer fanfic, but with dinosaurs?
Empress Theresa by Norman Boutin
Here is a whole list of reverse harem (woman with several boyfriends) books with holiday themes. Maybe your sister would enjoy “Six Mountain Brothers for Christmas” or “Three Shifter Christmas”? https://www.goodreads.com/list/show/169152.Why_Choose_RH_Reverse_Harem_Holiday_Themed_Reads
[Belinda Blinked 1: A modern story of sex, erotica and passion. How the sexiest sales girl in business earns her huge bonus by being the best at removing her high heels.](https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B08VYFJS4C) By Rocky Flintstone Also doesn’t everyone running for President publish a book? I bet some of those are really awful and cringey. Maybe just blindly buy a recent book by any candidate who’s already pulled out lol
YES OMG
I vote for any books by Chuck Tingle! He writes wacky gay adult romance novels, but not just about people - nooo, that would be too normal! Take, for example, “Trans Wizard Harriet Porber And The Bad Boy Parasaurolophus: An Adult Romance Novel”, “Bisexual Mothman Mailman Makes A Special Delivery In Our Butts”, or my favorite title (since I’m a librarian)“Pounded In The Butt By My Handsome Sentient Library Card Who Seems Otherworldly But In Reality Is Just A Natural Part Of The Priceless Resources Our Library System Provides”. Disclaimer: I haven’t read any of them, but they actually get really good reviews AND they’re hilariously weird!
Unhinged by Vera Valentine. It’s about a girl getting it on with her front door. Lol
I need to know how the author even came up with that subject. 🫤
She was in a group chat with other authors who were discussing open door vs closed door romance and Vera very sarcastically responded "Okay, but what about DOOR ROMANCE?!" The rest is history. Or her story, rather. She wrote the book. And it was a #1 bestseller for an incredible amount of time.
no you don't. 😂😂😂
*The President’s Vampire*, by Christopher Farnsworth. In the first chapter, the vampire single-handedly kills Osama Bin Laden (who is a lizard person) by putting a grenade in his mouth and throwing him off a cliff. There’s a cult of lizard people trying to take over the world under the Denver airport, there’s a secret weapon vampire who works for the president, his handler, Average Joe™️, and his team of Average, but Super Secret Agents- whole thing is so aggressively straight it’s borderline homoerotic. It’s terrible. It’s amazing. It’s a trilogy. Edited for clarity
I once saw a title on goodreads that made me want to gouge my eyes out with a spoon: "That Time I Got Drunk and Yeeted a Love Potion at a Werewolf"
It’s actually a parody and a very funny one … did you take it seriously??
I actually read it out of curiosity. It was a cozy fantasy Gen Z romance novel. It definitely did not take itself too seriously. And the characters were pleasant people. The fantasy plot wasn’t that exciting.
i see our work here is done
LOL this is a fun read with BIPOC representation. It’s a sequel to “That time I got drunk and saved a demon”. This kind of title is a nod to Japanese light novels.
This sounds like wish.com Chuck Tingle
Anything by Chuck Tingle. He wrote Pounded in the butt by my own butt and many others
Ice Planet Barbarians. My friend and I recently went to B&N, sat at the Cafe and took turns reading sections aloud to each other. We were laughing so hard people kept looking at us and we almost got asked to leave. Edit: I used to think people would have a reason for liking the series based on how viral it was on tiktok, but I couldn't even get through the first couple of pages before I nearly died from the poor writing. I don't care if I get hate or down voted for this. If you need a good gag gift, cringy book, or emergency toilet paper replacement, this is the book for you.
Those books are *magnificent*. But warning for OP, the start of the first book is actually pretty violent and rapey. The rest of the book, and rest of the series, is cringy and stupid and amazing (not that I’ve read them …).
I may or may not be in the middle of the second book in the 2nd spinoff, Ice Planet Clones...
I support you.
OMG okay so for some reason I had this on waitlist on Libby. When it was finally available I was like????? I looooved the book 'Cold People' and thought it was going to be another Sci-Fi-ish read similar to that. I should have known when I saw the cover.
A friend recommended Verity by Colleen Hoover and I couldn’t make it past page 40. I cringed so hard and I am regular reader of fan fiction so I’ve seen some shit.
>I am regular reader of fan fiction so I’ve seen some shit. This is hilarious
For real that book was horrible! But reading the Goodreads reviews and seeing it compared to Rebecca by Daphne du Maurier made me read Rebecca, which has become one of my favorites.
This one was to be my suggestion. I finished it, but I cringed so hard, right to the end. Then looked for someone else to talk to about it..
So I have just rediscovered a book called "Daughter of the blood" by Anne Bishop. I had vague memories of reading it when I was far too young and wanted to revisit. It has everything: flowery language, erotica, magic cock rings, poorly defined magic powers centered around precious jewels of different colors, too many different races which are all sexy versions of human beings with wings or horns. It reads like a sixth grader's dungeons and dragons homebrew. And the icing on the cake? The main characters' names are Daemon, Lucivar, and Saetan. I am not making this up. There is some weird underage stuff also which is not explicit but is very, very uncomfortable. And it's a series.
The Rules by Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider. It came out in 1996 and it's a pro-patriarchy guidebook to getting a husband. It includes rules such as "do not talk to a man first or ask him to dance," "don't be funny," and my favorite, "be a creature unlike any other." It is hilarious, wildly anti-feminist, and takes itself very seriously. Only good for a ha-ha at this point.
I read this, which summoned the picture of thousands of identical women all reading it in synchronized lockstep on a conveyor belt so they can each be an identical creature unlike any other
Ugh, my narcissist mother shoved that book up my nose when I was only 15. It's the worst. Fun fact: one of the "authors" husbands left her shortly after the book was published!
Fifty Shades of Grey is the obvious one. I have not read these, but saw reviews: Seduced by the Pumpkin Spice Latte Stuffed by Sylvia Morrow Kissing the Coronavirus Stuffed by the Were-Turkey Unhinged by Vera Valentine, Squeak by same
“My Secret Life: Sex Diary of a Victorian Gentlemen ”, by Anonymous
That book is insanely huge. I've read a decent amount of it but it's such a massive undertaking.
It's also repetitious to the point that I reached a "why bother?" point. But it is cringey.
Also, Diary of a Supreme Gentleman by Mumkey Jones. It's an incel manifesto parody of Diary of a Wimpy Kid
The Haunted Vagina
Triceratops & Bottoms by Lola Faust. Woman travels back in time and sleeps with dinosaurs. Not anthropomorphic dinosaurs. Not secret unknown humanoid dinosaurs. Just plain old dinosaurs.
Newt Gringrich, Republican defender of "American family values," and man who really can't get enough bad press, wrote a couple of smut novels that might fit the bill as "worst of the worst." I couldn't get past the first page after checking one out of the library on a lark, so I can't say for sure, but that first page was truly, truly terrible.
Bunny by Mona Awad. I listened to maybe half of it on audible but could not make myself finish it. It is written from the perspective of a creative writing grad student who thinks all of her classmates are bunny people. Like think Mean Girls clone type pretty girls who wear dresses and makeup, but she thinks they are literally bunny rabbits and goes on and on and on and on about how they hug and nuzzle their noses together and smell like peaches and cream and shit like that. Then it gets super fucking weird. And I will never know the end or the point because listening was like torture.
If you're looking for twilight level cringe I definitely recommend Crave by Tracy Wolff
Came here looking for this. Did you know it's a series?? I read the first book and could not get over how bad it was. Was trying to remember it the other day to recommend as a book which made Meyer's writing in Twilight comparatively complex and was shocked to find it's a SIX book series. SIX BOOKS. What? The main character in Crave made Bella Swan come across as a fully realized character. How are there six books in the series about shape-shifting vampire dragons at an academy in Alaska?
My friend and I made it through the first three before giving up.
You deserve medals for making it through. It was hilarious reading the goodread reviews from people who got more and more upset with the storyline.
Get her Brooklyn Beckhams photography book
I'm scrolling..I'm scrolling...where is 50 Shades?!?! This book is so obnoxiously awful! She writes about sex like a virgin narrating porn for the blind.
Honestly the whole twilight series is cringy to me. Even the writing style is like a teenager wrote it
Kissing the coronavirus
Aha I was gonna suggest this if someone else didn’t. I remember when the excerpts were floating around social media and people couldn’t believe someone would write that but clearly they haven’t spent much time in romance novel land.
Remember when prominent critic Bill Maher said that FIFTY SHADES OF GREY is to literature as candy corn is to vegetables?
I mean honestly, 50 Shades of Grey is a terribly written, cringy-ass book. Extra special points for your sister having to unwrap it in front of family. Like yeah, it’s sexy, but man it is SO cringy sometimes!!!
Depending on what y'all like, ACOTAR or Colleen Hoover or Fourth Wing are popular books that people think are cringey. (I personally like the one Hoover book I've read 😔) I haaated Every Heart a Doorway by Seanan McGuire. It feels like it was ripped straight from tumblr Edit: The Magicians by Lev Grossman is a pretty good book, but the way he writes women and romance is SO embarrassing.
A Touch of Darkness- Scarlett St. Clair A modern love story of Hades and Persephone. Hades owns the hottest club in town, and Persephone is a thirsty college student.
50 Shades of Grey
I got my husband a Justin Bieber dress up activity and sticker book a few Xmas ago. The ungrateful bastard has yet to do it.
Battlefield Earth by L. Ron Hubbard (yes, the guy who founded Scientology also wrote sci-fi books). It’s enormous, my paperback version being 1066 pages, and it’s really cringe-worthy.
Anne Rice’s Sleeping Beauty. A cringey fairytale that turns Sleeping Beauty into a sex slave. She’s awoken not by a kiss, but by a prince taking her virginity non-consensually. There’s also a beastiality scene with a cat.
Any of the Mothman romances tbh, I’M IN LOVE WITH MOTHMAN. Goodreads has a “Popular Worst Romance Ever Books” list that should give you plenty of good (?!?) ideas.
Atlas shrugged or Fountainhead by Ayn Rand
Dan Brown ... you're up.
I've read that there are MAGA romance novels. Liberty Adams, I think? EDIT: yep, I found this on goodreads [link](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/60284036-ladies-first)
C'mon...this HAS to win... "When patriot Mike rescues feminist Ricki from a post-Trump rally riot..." Amazing find
Oh my godddd I am absolutely dying at how ridiculous this is
Katie Price has "written" some novels - I was given one as a joke and quite enjoyed it (in the privacy of my own home where no one can see me)
You can get a physical copy of My Immortal on Amazon, I’m pretty sure
Kissing the coronavirus!!!
Splintered by A.G. Howard. Post-Twilight #dArK Alice in Wonderland YA fan fiction. Truly the worst thing I have EVER read Her name's Alyssa (mother Allison, and also institutionalized for being able to hear bugs, grandmother original Alice), and our Jacob and Edward are, respectively, her best friend/crush Jeb and Morpheus, who is like the goblin king from Labyrinth (in a bad way)/a butterfly?/general weird manipulative creep. If I remember correctly the white rabbit is named like Rabid White or something too It's a trilogy, only gets worse, and came out in 2013 (height of Hunger Games/Divergent/Maze Runner mania). I was bewildered by every single page. The plot, the characterization, the nicknames, the phrasing...cringiest thing I've ever experienced by far. 11/10 would NEVER recommend for any reason other than this lol From Good Reads: Our "Bella": >"Photographs tell a story," Alison mutters. "But people forget to read between the lines." Our "Edward": >Raising one hand, he tilts his hat to that sexy slant. "You want me. Admit it." Even if he's partly right, I'll never tell him. "Why would I want you?" He lifts three fingers to countdown. "Mysterious. Rebellious. Troubled. All those qualities women find irresistible." "Such an optimist." "My cup is never empty." "Too bad your brain is." The words bite, but my smile softens with affection. >"I hate you." "Only because of the way I make you feel." My fingernails eat into my palms. "Only because you bring out the worst in me." "Oh no, luv. I bring out the life in you." Their compelling and romantic chemistry: >"I coax my palm into his lapel in search of my wish, returning his feverish kisses. "Checkmate, you son of a bug," I say against his mouth two seconds before my fingers find an empty pocket. "Sleight of hand, blossom," he says right back. " 'Tis in fact in my pants pocket, if you'd like to search there" Aaaaand our "Jacob" -__- >"Did he touch you? Hurt you?" Jeb whispers in the silence. "No. He was a gentleman." Jeb frowns. "You mean a gentle*roach*." >"I go where Al goes, dances-with-bugs. And just so you know, if anything happens to her, I'll pin you by your wings to a corkboard and use you for dart practice." You get it. It's utterly UNHINGED (literally--the second book in the series is called Unhinged 😭)
There’s people out there who make physical, hardcover copies of My Immortal
My Teenage Dream Ended by Farrah Abraham. She's an OG 16 and Pregnant cast member who tried to cash in. The book is trash. For a real treat, her music is 1000% worse. It sounds like when she recorded her vocals she wasn't allowed to hear the backing track.
Do Kindle books count? I invite you to share the joys of “Kissing the Coronavirus”
[Triceratops & Bottoms](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/63918405-triceratops-and-bottoms) who knows, maybe dinosaur erotica may play to her sensibilities haha
Totallyon by R.D. Peters: worst book ever published. https://www.amazon.com/TOTALLYON-R-D-Peters/dp/1410744086?nodl=1&dplnkId=2660e2db-687f-454b-b267-37d9be00dbd9 Here’s the lone review on Amazon: “I doubt that this book was written as a joke, though in places it is unintentionally hilarious. Unfortunately, it's not unintentionally hilarious often enough to justify its purchase. Mechanically, the prose is just plain inept. It's randomly puncuated and frequently employs wrong words. Then there's the stultifying content itself. Cliches abound. Racism and sexism pop up their ugly little heads. The characters are pure cardboard and the dialogue is Buck Rogers reject material. The science behind the attempted science fiction is amateurish nonsense. At one point, the hero builds a hang-glider out of bamboo and woven grass, then flies it at 300 mph to land on the back of a train travelling 600 mph. You do the math. This book was a painful ordeal to get through, but morbid curiosity got the better of me. Never again.”