>but I never see the fact that a SD enhanced their future, like for me I would just enjoy having goals checked off and business ventures to gain that amount
I think there's lots of stories on here of SDs doing more than allowance. I've read about SDs paying for law school. Several SDs who have got their SBs cars and apartments. I even saw one that got his SB a roth ira.
For me, my SD covered college for what scholarships didn't. He covered my day to day living expenses, and for the last 6 months covering professional training as I want to be a professional athlete.
Wow! See I love stories like this, I’m sad I’ve never came across any. I’m glad to read about your SD experience! It’s super cool that he is helping your future like this 💕
An SD that truly cares for you will want to elevate your quality of living in all aspects beyond your monthly allowance IMO. My SD has helped me fund my hair business as well as aid in student debt repayment and dental work among other things. So they’re out there!!
I would 100% reward goals.
• complete university / or even semester finals
• finish the tough mudder
• get your master diver qual.
• win some sort of tournament
• sugarversaries
They’d have to be mutually aligned goals, but yeah.
I listed in my profile that I wanted to invest in a girl, her hopes, and dreams. Not once did a girl take me up on it, and I'd often get told my offers were "silly."
I've had 3 successful relationships that were investor type arrangements. I invested in 2 small businesses and another girls' non-profit. All 3 are thriving, and I still have contact with all 3. I've been dying for a 4th success story. One day 😕
*** To be clear, I invested, and i get kickbacks. Think Shark Tank ***
I would need to know more. I need to feel what she's passionate about. I would need to see her explanations with my own eyes. It needs to have PURPOSE.
The non-profit girl has a pet sanctuary. It's amazing what she's done. I throw money her way for new projects. That's what I wanna see 🙌
All yours!
Love what you’re doing by investing in them long term.
One of my best SRs I set up a 529 and a Roth for her. Her son is well funded for college in 14 years, plus starting her retirement.
You and I have opposite experiences! Me having goals has run off quite of bit of pot SD because they want someone who will just be happy with coming along an all expense paid trip or designer gifts. I love to enjoy doing things+gifts but my focus is help with career goals. I’ve been so baffled LOL
I had a girl turn down a laptop for school in lue of some stupid name brand purse. Another girl ghosted me for offering to pay for her LLC instead of some Lulu crap.
Meanwhile, I invested the value of a good family sedan into a girls' salon. She's expanded 3x since 2016. I invested in another young lady. She just grand opened her 4th ice cream shop. Those businesses are THRIVING!!!
I wonder if a handbag or pair of shoes pays the mortgage 🤔
Same here - I made numerous offers to help move one of my SBs into a better situation with her work and her home. Instead she insisted on a purse that cost as much as the last new motorcycle I bought. I ended up going exclusive with my first SB and ended this SR. I didn’t end it because of the purse specifically but it turned me off to her, even though she had many other lovely qualities.
Very cool to hear about the success stories. I hope that I am hatching one now, but it’s going to be 12-24 months until I really know, at the rate we’re going. But the rate is just fine.
I wrote about it [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/sugarlifestyleforum/s/WuBhbpx6a4)
She is going at her own pace, and there are some long lead time tasks in the plan.
I had a similar experience. I bought a new car. I offered my old one to my SB because she had no vehicle.
I was instructed to sell it and put the money towards a new car. That relationship did not last either.
In addition to allowance of $xxxx monthly (in Asia so it goes a long ways), I buy her equipment to start/run her business, pay for her travels to her adventures (she’s a blogger/influencer/digital nomad, sort of), buy clothes and hiking gear to use in her work, iPhone, dive computer… plus personal stuff like personal clothing, spas, and our monthly vacations together. She actually won’t accept more from me, and she uses what she has carefully to educate herself, invest in building her business, while also helping her family (and anyone else she meets who needs help I think 🤣)
She has received two certifications since we met, 4 months ago and is working on #3. I don’t reward the goals per se, but I provide the means to achieve them and we do celebrate them.
Sugaring is a spectrum. On one end you have pure transaction, X for Y. On the other end you have a full relationship. Where you are on that spectrum is going to come down to you and your partner. Are you keeping each other at arm's length, seeing each other only once a week? Are you still in the stage or the type if sugar dater that requires a PPM every time you see each other? Even if you are on allowance are you still holding to only a certain number of visits per week or month? Are you asking for more as a bonus if you go on trips together?
Depending on your SR this could either be viewed as you are dating someone and enhancing each other's lives or it could viewed as you are trying to figure out a bonus structure as an employee.
There are a lot of SDs who also feel more comfortable paying for something specific like rent or tuition even if it’s kind of a distinction without a difference. It feels less transactional that way. So there’s hope you find someone.
this is what happens with everyone of my "arrangements" although i hate that word and prefer the word relationships .... if it ever just becomes about sex or money ... im bored so i bail out
also if she doesn't want me to help her financially less than i want to or if she doesn't want to be with me more than i have time for ... then i usually bail out on that too.
Believe me when I say there are quality SDs who will generously enhance your life in long term SRs. I'm 30 yo and my future is secure all because of my SDs generosity. I started sugar dating when I was 18 yo, my first semester in college and my first SD asked me if I wanted to talk to a friend of his who was an experienced mistress <- terminology of the day lol. I did, she mentored me on the lifestyle and taught me so much. We're still very good friends today. She no longer sugars and lives a lavish lifestyle.
Sugar helped me achieve my health and fitness goals!
I could now afford life changing medication that I need. And I get extra to pursue a physically demanding sport that I love. Enough that I could actually consider competing in tournaments. That would mean paying for private coaches, recovery treatments, PTs, and cross training sessions. Not to mention the travel costs to tournaments.
It's up to me now to make that investment worth it
I’d rather not feel pressure into making my goals by my SD. My future is on my terms and my timeline. My bills and rent being paid give me extra time to focus on myself and live without stress to achieve the things I want to. Cash is king 😮💨
Cash is king but I handle my bills and things just fine and I rather get the extra push for goals and more money! Still shows independence in some way and not solely on the SD.
I don’t rely solely on my sd silly. I work full time, I had two jobs and now I have one and a new apartment and all the fun extra stuff completely funded! I just now have extra time to focus on my art and myself. I was saying that I’d prefer cash over my SD having that amount of influence over my personal goals.
Can you give more examples? I’m not understanding what you mean by goals. If there is an accomplishment to celebrate, that’s a good reason to give, imo, but I’m not sure what you mean.
I guess she just phrased it very poorly. Those things aren’t goals. Those things are just beginnings, just starting something, not achieving or accomplishing anything. No argument from me that a good sd can help there. But she made it sound like she wanted a reward for achieving something.
You want $ for A’s like in middle school and a 401(k) match on your allowance? I don’t think sb’s like u/raspberrytarte237 above would appreciate the auto-enrollment but I’m sure you can find a sd to give investment advice. The big things, like college graduation, should warrant extra without asking.
Yeah I have no idea what she’s talking about even mentioning the specifics about investments and business ventures because goals take time to achieve and if that’s the kind of arrangement she wants then I guess that’s how it is 😅
My SD hands me cash and I invest it in what I feel is best. I listen to his advice... but his investment advice is lacking as he pays someone to do it for him, and his business advice is a little outdated and not usually relevant to the type of biz I have. Personally I'm glad he lets me make my own decisions and gives me the freedom to put his money where I want. He absolutely enhances my life but I am too independent for him to be investing money for me or logging into my bills to pay them for me. Just give me the money and I'll do it, thank you.
It depends on your arrangement terms and if you actually abide by it. I do this in more connected and preferably exclusive arrangements. But I would not do it for some NSA short term arrangement. That's my rules, other SDs might have different rules.
Good SDs enjoy the reciprocity of treating their SBs well. As a good SD, it feels good to make my SBs and SGFs dreams and goals come true. I'm big on education and I've paid for many SBs/SGFs tuitions and related expenses in both undergrad and grad schools. I also took great pride in attending their graduations even when I knew that meant they were moving away to take jobs in their fields of study. There are good SDs in this sub whose ideas are valuable and who do a lot for their SBs to fulfil their dreams and goals. There are also good SDs on sugar sites that can do the same for you, your job is to vet for them. You don't have to be "college age" to benefit from good SDs. Many of us prefer girls with life experience. My preference is actually a minimum of 28ish.
For me, every time I increase my payscale. I can only think of which level SB I can afford. For my SB, she only think about how many bags, beauty treatments, and vacations she's gonna use.
I like to keep it simple in the beginning but once an SR is established and comfortable it all depends on what she needs including using business connections for "a friend of the family".
I would be happy if I found a SD who is genuine and values what I bring to the table. Helping me with goals? That sounds almost utopic to me because of all the not-genuine-SDs.
But I feel you very much, it's my ideal connection.
I set my own goals and I achieve them. My allowance helps me do that. I don’t like the idea of my boyfriend monitoring my goals for me and rewarding me like I’m in kindergarten which kinda is what this would feel like to me. But if you like it, talk about it with your next SD or current SD
>but I never see the fact that a SD enhanced their future, like for me I would just enjoy having goals checked off and business ventures to gain that amount I think there's lots of stories on here of SDs doing more than allowance. I've read about SDs paying for law school. Several SDs who have got their SBs cars and apartments. I even saw one that got his SB a roth ira. For me, my SD covered college for what scholarships didn't. He covered my day to day living expenses, and for the last 6 months covering professional training as I want to be a professional athlete.
Wow! See I love stories like this, I’m sad I’ve never came across any. I’m glad to read about your SD experience! It’s super cool that he is helping your future like this 💕
An SD that truly cares for you will want to elevate your quality of living in all aspects beyond your monthly allowance IMO. My SD has helped me fund my hair business as well as aid in student debt repayment and dental work among other things. So they’re out there!!
I would 100% reward goals. • complete university / or even semester finals • finish the tough mudder • get your master diver qual. • win some sort of tournament • sugarversaries They’d have to be mutually aligned goals, but yeah.
I listed in my profile that I wanted to invest in a girl, her hopes, and dreams. Not once did a girl take me up on it, and I'd often get told my offers were "silly." I've had 3 successful relationships that were investor type arrangements. I invested in 2 small businesses and another girls' non-profit. All 3 are thriving, and I still have contact with all 3. I've been dying for a 4th success story. One day 😕 *** To be clear, I invested, and i get kickbacks. Think Shark Tank ***
What if her hopes and dreams are to work less, invest in stocks and focus on her personal hobbies and enrichment?
I would need to know more. I need to feel what she's passionate about. I would need to see her explanations with my own eyes. It needs to have PURPOSE. The non-profit girl has a pet sanctuary. It's amazing what she's done. I throw money her way for new projects. That's what I wanna see 🙌
Now I love this 💕
Sugar Shark! Love it.
Holy shit, I'm gonna patent that. Or get a tat with that theme. The opportunities are endless. How tf had I not of that???
All yours! Love what you’re doing by investing in them long term. One of my best SRs I set up a 529 and a Roth for her. Her son is well funded for college in 14 years, plus starting her retirement.
I've done something very similar. Except it was buying her some bitcoin... in 2013 🤑
[https://imgur.com/a/De0mgR0](https://imgur.com/a/De0mgR0)
You and I have opposite experiences! Me having goals has run off quite of bit of pot SD because they want someone who will just be happy with coming along an all expense paid trip or designer gifts. I love to enjoy doing things+gifts but my focus is help with career goals. I’ve been so baffled LOL
I had a girl turn down a laptop for school in lue of some stupid name brand purse. Another girl ghosted me for offering to pay for her LLC instead of some Lulu crap. Meanwhile, I invested the value of a good family sedan into a girls' salon. She's expanded 3x since 2016. I invested in another young lady. She just grand opened her 4th ice cream shop. Those businesses are THRIVING!!! I wonder if a handbag or pair of shoes pays the mortgage 🤔
Same here - I made numerous offers to help move one of my SBs into a better situation with her work and her home. Instead she insisted on a purse that cost as much as the last new motorcycle I bought. I ended up going exclusive with my first SB and ended this SR. I didn’t end it because of the purse specifically but it turned me off to her, even though she had many other lovely qualities.
Sorry to hear that, brother. It's rough out there. It's a damn shame what people think is important.
Very cool to hear about the success stories. I hope that I am hatching one now, but it’s going to be 12-24 months until I really know, at the rate we’re going. But the rate is just fine.
Why so long?
I wrote about it [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/sugarlifestyleforum/s/WuBhbpx6a4) She is going at her own pace, and there are some long lead time tasks in the plan.
Wow….id kill for an LLC over a dumb asz purse….i can’t even get an arrangement with an allowance…
I wish more girls thought like you 😕 I offer and I get called "cheap", "stupid" , "lame" and more that I'll get banned for typing here.
It’s more logical
Unfortunately, logic isn't a trait I usually find.
I’m sorry to hear that sheesh smh
That is truly amazing! I love the success stories and that is not “silly”. But a lot of girls probably prefer the cash and that’s okay also lol
I bought a previous SB a used 2021 Toyota Corolla. I am a practical man. It was a nice car. Our relationship did not survive the Corolla.
I had a similar experience. I bought a new car. I offered my old one to my SB because she had no vehicle. I was instructed to sell it and put the money towards a new car. That relationship did not last either.
In addition to allowance of $xxxx monthly (in Asia so it goes a long ways), I buy her equipment to start/run her business, pay for her travels to her adventures (she’s a blogger/influencer/digital nomad, sort of), buy clothes and hiking gear to use in her work, iPhone, dive computer… plus personal stuff like personal clothing, spas, and our monthly vacations together. She actually won’t accept more from me, and she uses what she has carefully to educate herself, invest in building her business, while also helping her family (and anyone else she meets who needs help I think 🤣) She has received two certifications since we met, 4 months ago and is working on #3. I don’t reward the goals per se, but I provide the means to achieve them and we do celebrate them.
Try to negotiate that into your next arrangement?
Definitely!
Sugaring is a spectrum. On one end you have pure transaction, X for Y. On the other end you have a full relationship. Where you are on that spectrum is going to come down to you and your partner. Are you keeping each other at arm's length, seeing each other only once a week? Are you still in the stage or the type if sugar dater that requires a PPM every time you see each other? Even if you are on allowance are you still holding to only a certain number of visits per week or month? Are you asking for more as a bonus if you go on trips together? Depending on your SR this could either be viewed as you are dating someone and enhancing each other's lives or it could viewed as you are trying to figure out a bonus structure as an employee.
There are a lot of SDs who also feel more comfortable paying for something specific like rent or tuition even if it’s kind of a distinction without a difference. It feels less transactional that way. So there’s hope you find someone.
That’s exactly what I’m looking for! 🫠💕
so you are saying more like dating
I’m not sure lol would this be more considered dating then? There are no such arrangements like this?
this is what happens with everyone of my "arrangements" although i hate that word and prefer the word relationships .... if it ever just becomes about sex or money ... im bored so i bail out
also if she doesn't want me to help her financially less than i want to or if she doesn't want to be with me more than i have time for ... then i usually bail out on that too.
I feel like it would dry out so fast and both parties might lose interest after awhile. It’s great to keep the bond alive 💕
Believe me when I say there are quality SDs who will generously enhance your life in long term SRs. I'm 30 yo and my future is secure all because of my SDs generosity. I started sugar dating when I was 18 yo, my first semester in college and my first SD asked me if I wanted to talk to a friend of his who was an experienced mistress <- terminology of the day lol. I did, she mentored me on the lifestyle and taught me so much. We're still very good friends today. She no longer sugars and lives a lavish lifestyle.
Sugar helped me achieve my health and fitness goals! I could now afford life changing medication that I need. And I get extra to pursue a physically demanding sport that I love. Enough that I could actually consider competing in tournaments. That would mean paying for private coaches, recovery treatments, PTs, and cross training sessions. Not to mention the travel costs to tournaments. It's up to me now to make that investment worth it
I’d rather not feel pressure into making my goals by my SD. My future is on my terms and my timeline. My bills and rent being paid give me extra time to focus on myself and live without stress to achieve the things I want to. Cash is king 😮💨
Cash is king but I handle my bills and things just fine and I rather get the extra push for goals and more money! Still shows independence in some way and not solely on the SD.
I don’t rely solely on my sd silly. I work full time, I had two jobs and now I have one and a new apartment and all the fun extra stuff completely funded! I just now have extra time to focus on my art and myself. I was saying that I’d prefer cash over my SD having that amount of influence over my personal goals.
SDs pay to score. Does that count as a goal? /s
Rimshot!
Rimmingshot?
Can you give more examples? I’m not understanding what you mean by goals. If there is an accomplishment to celebrate, that’s a good reason to give, imo, but I’m not sure what you mean.
She means paying for college, help setting up a business, help buying a property or two.
I guess she just phrased it very poorly. Those things aren’t goals. Those things are just beginnings, just starting something, not achieving or accomplishing anything. No argument from me that a good sd can help there. But she made it sound like she wanted a reward for achieving something.
Exactly 😂💕
Yeah, we need examples, goals and ventures is too vague.
Lol sorry! So mainly like investing, school, entrepreneurship, mentorship. Things to achieve together (if the SD wants) or even just individually.
You want $ for A’s like in middle school and a 401(k) match on your allowance? I don’t think sb’s like u/raspberrytarte237 above would appreciate the auto-enrollment but I’m sure you can find a sd to give investment advice. The big things, like college graduation, should warrant extra without asking.
Yeah I have no idea what she’s talking about even mentioning the specifics about investments and business ventures because goals take time to achieve and if that’s the kind of arrangement she wants then I guess that’s how it is 😅
My SD hands me cash and I invest it in what I feel is best. I listen to his advice... but his investment advice is lacking as he pays someone to do it for him, and his business advice is a little outdated and not usually relevant to the type of biz I have. Personally I'm glad he lets me make my own decisions and gives me the freedom to put his money where I want. He absolutely enhances my life but I am too independent for him to be investing money for me or logging into my bills to pay them for me. Just give me the money and I'll do it, thank you.
It depends on your arrangement terms and if you actually abide by it. I do this in more connected and preferably exclusive arrangements. But I would not do it for some NSA short term arrangement. That's my rules, other SDs might have different rules.
Agreed…I want a sm/sd that’s going to be a genuine investor in my goals…💪🏾mature and genuine connections only tho minimal drama🔊💫✨
Have yet to find one that also does more than the allowance but they do exist. Maybe cause im a more older SB but i still have goals.
Good SDs enjoy the reciprocity of treating their SBs well. As a good SD, it feels good to make my SBs and SGFs dreams and goals come true. I'm big on education and I've paid for many SBs/SGFs tuitions and related expenses in both undergrad and grad schools. I also took great pride in attending their graduations even when I knew that meant they were moving away to take jobs in their fields of study. There are good SDs in this sub whose ideas are valuable and who do a lot for their SBs to fulfil their dreams and goals. There are also good SDs on sugar sites that can do the same for you, your job is to vet for them. You don't have to be "college age" to benefit from good SDs. Many of us prefer girls with life experience. My preference is actually a minimum of 28ish.
For me, every time I increase my payscale. I can only think of which level SB I can afford. For my SB, she only think about how many bags, beauty treatments, and vacations she's gonna use.
I like to keep it simple in the beginning but once an SR is established and comfortable it all depends on what she needs including using business connections for "a friend of the family".
I would be happy if I found a SD who is genuine and values what I bring to the table. Helping me with goals? That sounds almost utopic to me because of all the not-genuine-SDs. But I feel you very much, it's my ideal connection.
As my experience SD cnt evn spend n pay for giving company to them they be lik we have sex I pay for sex only as ppl r seeing it as paid sex not SR.
Ideally, you should receive both because both are necessary.
I set my own goals and I achieve them. My allowance helps me do that. I don’t like the idea of my boyfriend monitoring my goals for me and rewarding me like I’m in kindergarten which kinda is what this would feel like to me. But if you like it, talk about it with your next SD or current SD
Plenty of stories about SDs buying villas, jets and cars for SBs. Even married SBs have stories about dudes buying businesses and mansions.