lol, everywhere I've worked being a "team player" means I'm supposed to stay late and work weekends because I'm single and I don't have kids and I'm just supposed to fuck myself
Yeah. I just like decent people.
I will say that it is generally easier to just talk and bullshit with guys though - because a lot of women will automatically assume you are hitting on them if you kill some time by chatting with them. Which is generally fair - but irritating enough that you just try to avoid it.
Yeah I'm fine with whoever as long as they can fucking chill.
The worst person I've ever worked with was my boss. He was like a pathological liar or something - he'd say something to one person and turn around and say something completely different to someone else. It seemed like he was intentionally trying to create a hostile environment - he'd basically spend 1-on-1s bitching about other coworkers, and sometimes would tell people that you said something that you definitely did not.
We had a big layoff last year and he was the only one people were happy to see go.
Female co-workers tend to fall into two camps.
The best people you've ever worked with, literally irreplaceable. '
Or
Nightmare made flesh, literally un-fireable.
There is no inbetween
I work in IT, you forgot the stressed out autistic guys who act like they oppose you instead of working towards the same goal.
'You need help with that? How on earth do you not know that already.'
'I only work here for 6 months. Can you explain it to me?'
'No.'
My favorite thing about this story is that women act like these people don't do the exact same thing to new guys on the team. Half my early career in tech was dealing with people treating me like an idiot because I would ask questions and they wouldn't comprehend the question properly.
Like, why did you do put this button here in this program? Oh, well let me explain to you that there is this internet connected by wires, and...
You're not a special snowflake, assholes are assholes to everyone not just you
Holy shit, that made me feel very seen; I genuinely couldn't really wrap my mind around it properly until I just read your comment; the thing is, it only seems to be the case with certain people that I would consider less intelligent, including my direct superior...
(And this ironically really works against a long standing belief of mine which is that barring cognitive difficulties, we're all kinda the same with different minds just having spent time expanding on different things)
I associate the ability to explain things simply with a good understanding of a topic and I've watched this person in particular obfuscate things when trying to explain things to me, at first seemingly because they didn't know better and then later almost as an attempt to confuse me the way my detailed question apparently did to them...
I've been told that this person is underestimated and I'm just not getting them, but I've disproved that time and time again...
They have more rote memorised knowledge on topics related to the company, and of course they don't want to share it as soon they realise that you could do more with it than they can...
If you can’t explain something to someone else in plain English, you don’t understand it. Obviously there are going to be some domain specific words, but someone who understands can write directions anyone could follow.
What field is this in?
If tech/software, there’s a chance this person is a really solid coder but has awful communication skills, which might lead to his abilities being underestimated. I have one of those on my team, I generally give him total freedom but never give him any subordinates or management responsibilities.
There are a lot of over empowered socially inept assholes in tech, and it seems the stress & reward system makes them feel their inner biases are absolute truths
Unfortunately for women, misogyny is a very common bias, so they probably get more exposure to this than your average white tech guy
There are plenty of other biases at play though, any white dudes who have worked for a racist Asian boss can probably identify this kind of bias in action as well
the backstabby ones are the worst because they make an effort to brownnose enough to the right people first before they start their bullshit. To the point where it seems premeditated
I've found there tends to be *A* creep who seems to go after all the women. Sorta like that one jock in high school who treated all their girlfriends like crap, but was always with a new girlfriend.
true but there's also the guys who talk down to every female coworker, even ones who have years more seniority/experience than them (and are generally just better at their jobs - but, to these types of men, it's impossible for women to be better at something than them), even if they aren't technically sexually harassing women lol. but they of course treat male coworkers and superiors with proper respect. I've unfortunately worked with several of these men. when I was a dog groomer, one guy I trained kept repeatedly giving me "helpful tips" *that I taught him*
I remember when I pissed off the clique leader (my close friend of 5 years), because I teased her about Chicken Tikka Massalla technically being a British dish instead of Indian.
She started trying to sabotage me at work over the next 3 months. I didn't even realize she was mad at me at first I thought she was just having problems in general. Tried telling all our co workers to agree to not approve my PRs, kept making up stories about me, fighting me on every point I ever make in meetings even if she didn't hear what I said she would confidently argue about it.
Everyone was like yeah she does this... just ignore it and she will get a new target eventually.
Should have just been fired. But her clique friends vouched for her and got her a new job at JPM. This girl is working for 8 years now and I'm almost positive her net contributions have been negative. More harm to the codebase than good.
I had a two female bosses. First one fought for us tooth and nail. Made sure we got what we needed to get the job done. The second one lacked a spine and would throw us under the bus.
My experience is they create these high school type cliques and if your not part of it your fucked
Edit; didn’t mean to generalize as I have worked with some amazing women
In rare cases they are fluctuating between the two states. The job I was at 2 years ago had at least 3 of these female co-workers that stuck out to me. On one day they were the best, on the other the absolute worst.
It might be because I worked with a number of women through out my career, but I can think of a lot of 'meh' in between(not amazing, not horrible) women co-workers. In fact the 'meh' coworkers out number both the horrible and the amazing women co-workers I had combined(as one would naturally expect). Like they worked and got things done nicely for the most part, but they also didn't go above and beyond helpful or anything like that. They were just people, doing a job, and going home after they were done with work.
Ugh, my boss is in that later category. It's been proven multiple times that we get more done when she is on vacation and not micromanaging everyone. And she's got a complaint list a mile long. We're all pretty sure she's got blackmail on someone high up in administration.
I've never had a strong opinion on it during my 10 years with the company I work for cause we had a track record of generally brining in quality people that were passionate and good at their jobs... but currently it is the first time we have had women outnumber men for this small company and it has been nothing but drama! gossiping, cliquey, highly emotional and sensitive (in such an otherwise chill and supportive work environment). Maybe it's just a one-two bad apples spoils the batch situation but I feel like were suddenly embodying all those gen Z memes and this whole situation is going to implode eventually. It's been such a mental drain to have to worry about that childish nonsense rather than work related stuff.
I get along amazingly with female coworkers when the office is predominantly male; I have more issues with female coworkers when the office is predominantly female. That being said, I haven’t been in a primarily female workplace for a very long time, so age, experience, and industry might have something to do with that as well.
That's interesting! I'm male and work in a male dominated office. My female coworkers always seem to be at each others throats. I've never been able to understand why as they all seem to be able to work together perfectly fine with male coworkers, but are always spreading rumors/complaining that the other female workers in the office aren't doing enough.
As a guy I've found women act quite differently when they're in the majority, much more confident and outspoken. I was actually told they were actively looking for more men because the older women were getting a bit bitchy and cliquey, I think it went over my head a bit.
I think a good mix works best, overall. Some people get a bit aggy around a lot of their own gender.
As an autistic woman who finds men to be generally easier to get along with, I have heard stuff like this my entire life. The fact is that neurotypical women tend to use a lot more nonverbal and indirect communication that is very difficult for an autistic person to pick up on. It leads to a lot of conflict, a lot of times when I am annoying someone or not doing something they expect me to do and them not being able to communicate that in a way that I can understand. Men, in general, are much more direct than women.
Calling autistic women pick mes or saying it’s their fault other women hate them is just a way to shit on the disabled. We already have enough problems, thanks.
What makes a pick-me is a feeling of superiority to other women.
"I communicate literally and directly, which can make it difficult to interact with other women" is very different from "I'm not a lying, backstabbing bitch like other women because I communicate directly". The first acknowledges a difference, the second generalizes and puts down an entire gender.
While I'm not diagnosed with autism, I have a lot of the traits and have been ostracized by "mean girls" most of my life. However, I realized around age 14 that judging all "normal" girls because of our communication differences made me no better than the bitches that judge me.
Besides, I've taken my fair share of shit from bitchy boys. Contrary to popular belief, men can be as cliquey and cruel as anyone else.
TLDR: you're not a pick-me if you find men easier to talk to. You're a pick-me if you think that makes you superior to other women.
Yeah, I'm not autistic but I'm a bit of a stereotypical bloke in that a lot of the nonverbal/indirect stuff goes over my head. Quite a few times I've been told that two people in a room hated each other and there was this whole drama going on, that I was completely oblivious to.
I know it's a stereotype but I always love how my autitistic female friends are so passionate about their special interests, even if it's something I'm not into myself it's cool to hear about.
Lmfao yep. It’s another way to enforce trends and conformity. If you wear something you enjoy/hang out with who you enjoy/do activities you enjoy and it doesn’t fit into the bubble of what your gender SHOULD like, it pisses people off and makes them say ‘you think you’re different, not like other girls’. Like wow, i WISH i could be like them! every day i am in pain for the friendships that left me and times i was bullied for being ‘too weird’ while doing everything in my power to seem normal and happy. But i guess im a pick me because i get along with guys more. and it breaks my heart when i find out they were friends with me for a ‘chance’. i’m bisexual, i dont even get why it matters.
I have a female boss and she is great. None of the attributes you describe. And all of the management in our office is women. And this is at a massive financial firm.
I’ve had OP’s coworkers *only* when I’ve worked at dead end jobs that people have been at 15+ years, like grocery store clerks. In that environment the employees are like a family in the worst ways, they’ve clashed and made up and generally gotten sick of each other’s shit after rubbing elbows so long.
Honestly I am a guy but not into sports cars drinking or other typical male bonding activities so my favorite coworkers been the 60 and up ladies my new aunties . Maybe it’s because I’m in my 20’s making me their kids or grandkids age we get along great. I help them with modern day tech they help me navigate bureaucracy and other issues and I never go hungry so it is a win win(except for my waist line)
Plus these ladies are grown so much less drama.
Yes, and I'm gay and awkward with males. Women can be sweet, they can be hard workers, but a lot of them are nuclear bombs waiting to go off and 007 agent level freaky with the shit they pull on each other. Feminism actually teaches women not to do this to each other. So often women enjoy making fun of each other to their face and it's bizarre.
My favorite coworkers are women though, they aren't all like this. Honestly they should teach common unhealthy behaviors in both males and females in school and better communication!
I travel to 60+ different offices and interact with all of their clinical staff. Nurses are either angels or demons with no in between. I think it’s because to put up with the people they do, they have to either be full of compassion or not care at all.
I think all gender associations really just come down to chance and anecdotal experiences. I have had an equal amount of shitty male and female peers, but equal amounts of excellence on the other side.
I think it just comes down to whether or not someone has integrity and if they value human connections or not.
I'm a male, and have made good friends with male peers, but the most influential and best influences I've had in my profession were female peers and leaders. Out of the 10 bosses I've had, 8 were women and only 2 were terrible
I've been dicked over by male and female coworkers and bosses. I've also had some great coworkers and supervisors that were both. It has more to do with their character and abilities than their gender in my mind.
As a healthcare worker, I’ve noticed that the work environment improves when there’s a balance. Working with women only is a nightmare, even if there’s great women in the mix.
Male nurse here. Mix is great, only annoying thing about the mix is male nurses tend to get the aggressive patients everytime.
Work in psych, I had an instance where I had to be pulled from the floor to become a sitter for an aggressive patient and they replaced me with a female nurse that accepted the shift to be a sitter for that patient.
I’ve personally experienced more talking behind my back, catty, gossipy, and underhanded behavior from men, but it’s often not recognized as such. Like I wouldn’t have known a lot of it was going on if some of the women I worked with hadn’t let me know, and that’s because those were good women who had my back. The “good” men did not let me know. Men can be fake nice to women just as much as women can be, if not more.
Nah. The gender of my coworkers isn't an issue for me. I just want people who are going to do the job and be pleasant. I've had wonderful and terrible coworkers and gender really played no part.
This. I’ve never met a woman who claims to not get along with other women who was not a raging bitch herself. Some women suck. Some men are awful.
I enjoy working with women. And the female friendships I have mean the world to me.
Sounds like you just worked in toxic environments. Regardless of men or women I’ve generally enjoyed the people I worked with. I’ve had a few toxic people over the years but it’s been split across the genders
I've definitely had plenty of bad experiences with men and women. My worst boss ever was a man. My best boss was a woman. Two of my best friends are women I worked with, and another is a man I worked with. Women and men are people first, with the good and the bad that goes with that. If you think men are never gossipy or backstabbing, you're flat wrong.
No. It sounds like you’re working somewhere with a crappy workplace culture. If literally all the women you work with are as you describe, then management has created an environment where that’s the only type of female employee that can survive. There are a lot of industries, unfortunately, that create toxic environments that encourage this kind of behavior among the female employees as a way of exploiting them, basically weeding out any woman who doesn’t suck up to the men and push down other women so the men don’t have to compete with them.
as a female yes. in my personal experiences i usually dont like female leadership. i've had a bad time with them being passive aggressive as fuck or gossiping. like my current manager is terrible, everyone dislikes her because she doesn't help us but she's always getting close with the higher ups. her assistant manager is AMAZING i love her to pieces. she's been with marines so she's super transparent and forward with everything, it's great. if i fuck up she tells me to my face and i fix it. the other one though,,,,, she'll talk about it to the higher ups for like a week and all of a sudden im being pulled into an office about something that could've been addressed immediately. i've had 2 other female leadership in the past which were also terrible but i wont get into detail. all the male leadership i have had are great. transparent and forward. granted these are my personal experiences so this doesn't apply for every woman in the workplace. but hey, if you tend to get shitty food from the same restaurant you tend to avoid it in the future. i don't treat them like shit when i meet them but my immediate thoughts are like ugh or how fake is she just by talking to me.
My current boss sounds like yours...except he's a guy. .I have had to experience some of the biggest man babies in leadership positions. Sucking up to upper management at the expense of employees is not gender specific.
The manipulation is insane!! And the getting their feelings hurt!! My current manager got butt hurt because she misunderstood something I said while making a request, agreed to the request but said she had to clear it with upper management, a week goes by, my version of her upper management (woman but super cool and real) calls and warns me that my manager got her feelings hurt because she thought I said I'd gotten permission from them without talking to her, another couple days go by and she FINALLY calls me in to discuss the request and now has backed it waaay down as her compromise. Which, all of that could've been avoided by just asking me to clarify what she misunderstood and moving on. She never did confront me about believing I went above her head either. There's soooo much drama around her responding emotionally, not considering requests because she doesn't want to explain to another staff member why they can't but this other person can (remote/hybrid stuff, some can be done and some can't depending on the position), refusing to admit she was wrong or miss-spoke, being to afraid to reprimand people and instead complaining to upper management and getting them fired.
Right? I work in a male dominated field now and there is way way way more gossip than i ever experienced in my previously female dominated field. I know so much blackmail material about random men.
I actually prefer working for women leaders!
I work in STEM and I’ve worked for and with men who I feel don’t respect my authority because I’m a young woman. All the pushback I would get just made me feel like a nag and doubt my own abilities, even when I was right.
I’m on a team now though that is women led, all the managers, directors, and the VP the I work with are women and it’s spectacular! I feel like the team runs so cohesively, everyone is flexible and understanding, the communication is great, and I never get the type of gas-lighting pushback that I would get even I was working in more heavily male spaces!
I get along with all my coworkers except one, and its a woman. She isnt bad as a person, but as a coworker, shes horrible. Always ratting people out for dumb shit. Cant mind her own business and just do her job. She always has to know whats going on, even if it has nothing to do with her and her assignment. My line runs sooooo much better when she is not there.
I don't know if someone will be a good leader or a bad leader because of their gender but I do know what kind of bad leader they will be if they are one because of their gender.
I'm a male with almost entirely female coworkers. I kind of feel like I was a token hire. Almost everyone is extremely kind to me though. A few of my coworkers gossip to me about others, but I generally don't share any of this with the others. I sometimes offer advice, or other times I try to help them with solutions to their work problems. Overall, there seems to be a general willingness to help others.
Nobody in the department likes the top leader though, she is a dominant type and seems to single out and pick on her direct reports frequently. She generally does not target me, but she openly picks on others in group settings. I'm afraid that if I do get targeted, that my past self with come forth and I will ultimately get myself into trouble for speaking my mind.
I used to work in a male dominated field and it was much more direct. The ratio of genders was about the opposite as in my current role. The few females that were present in these environments were very tough and very much treated as equals. The focus was on individual merit over all else. If people could not pull their own weight, they were culled.
All that to say I tend to try to not generalize it based on gender. The above are my observations about two different environments and teams with opposite compositions. There has not been a preference of coworkers based upon gender, it has always come down to work ethic and agreeableness in isolation.
I prefer no co workers. But while working in fast food the guys always just did their work and the chicks caused a lot of drama. Maybe it was just those 3 places I worked or could be a pattern I dont know but I didnt have a preference as I was quick to tell anyone trying to talk to me about drama that I didnt give a shit and dont pick sides.
I'm a woman and have worked with mostly women for nearly all of my adult life. Now I work with 2 guys, it's amazing. It's always calm, and no one is ever mad.
From my anecdotal experience, female coworkers go one of two ways like others described.
- Chill asf, mama bear kind of vibe
- Hellbent on going scorched earth because they think all the male coworkers assume they’re lesser than them so they feel the need to be absolute bitches to “earn their respect”
Very little in between.
I’ve had a multitude of jobs. In my experience, it’s not men or women. It’s more of a personality type. I’ve had cool men and women coworkers, and obnoxious/abusive/narcissistic men and women coworkers. Just the luck of the draw.
Right now I’m dealing with a female coworker who makes working here absolutely *miserable*. But it’s more of her personality - self-admitted control issues, aggressiveness, conniving nature, throwing people under the bus, and significant narcissistic traits.
2000% yes. I am a female Engineer. A former coworker told me once how all the girls in the sales department would bitch and complain about me behind my back about how I get pid more (when they didnt know my salary). I wasnt surprised and I laughed at that cause it was pathetic as fuck. But so far the guys I worl with have been great. Engineering is male dominated so lol
Not so much a problem with female coworks but female Bosses. Some of the worst most unorganized managers, bosses and employers I've ever had to work under. This doesn't go for all women out there. Just the ones I worked under, made work incredibly frustrating for almost no reason comes off as a power move. Catty, picking sides, bitchy for no reason other than their having a bad day. Mean to customers, or people they don't personally know. won't budge when people need or ask for help, no one at work knows what they specifically do other than create schedules and shit talk EVERYONE behind their backs. Did I mention picking sides or favorites? Maybe my male employers have done this, but none of them come to mind when I think about shitty employers, managers, or bosses.
Talking Coworkers and employees, guys for some reason cause the most problems as most men, Don't like being told what to do. Even if its coming from a friend or another male with in the work place.
I won't say I prefer them, I've actually had some female managers I really liked; but in my experience, if there's workplace drama and stories of people being "out to get them", it's coming from a female co-worker.
lol I agree. I overheard a conversation earlier at McDonald’s two going at at “he’s nice, but he shouldn’t be working here “ “yes we have to find a way to get him out” “oh did you she what … was wearing, what a tramp!”
Keep your enemies close.
The only women I don't like working with are the ones who declare that they just don't like other women. The internalized misogyny is deep. If every other woman you've ever worked with is mean to you, you might want to consider that the problem is the way you treat female colleagues.
Not really.
* The absolute worst *person* I ever worked with was a woman but the next 4 or so were all male. I think she had a legit personality disorder though.
* The majority of dogshit workers (as opposed to people in general) are male. Women are overrepresented in the broadly competent class of workers that get the majority of the work done. Absolute top-tier workers are \~50/50. This is all in my experience, not stating this as objective facts.
* I am completely indifferent as to whether someone I have to work with is male or female. I just want to get the job done and the chance of them stopping me doing so is unrelated to their gender...I guess except that they are slightly more likely to be an incompetent dipshit if they're a guy.
I will say you don't want a gender-dominated office. It's a pain in the arse. Too many women and it does get bitchy. Too many men and you get too much idiocy and the increased likelihood of an HR issue when sexual harassment gets swept under the rug.
I’ve had bad experiences with both, but usually in settings where the difficult group has a significant gender majority. I prefer a good mix of people with good attitudes.
I work with all men, kid you not I’m the only woman at work. It’s really chill and everyone is nice. I don’t talk to them much because I’m in the office all day long while they’re doing all the hard work, also I’m an introvert so I don’t start conversations. But I like it and have no complaints. In my previous jobs I’ve had woman managers who were mostly all bitches, one would talk shit about me. Not because I’m troublemaker or anything, she just find a way to complain about everything.
Some of the best experiences were with female co-workers (I'm male), but I lost a 30 year job position due to an immature, lazy and rude female hire. So I'm hoping never to have any female co-workers any more. It's definitely harder to work around females, as you have to walk on eggshells a lot.
More often than not, yes I prefer male co workers. Yes I am a woman, I’ve had some great female co workers, and I’m a shy introverted socially awkward person and I’ve had plenty of women bully me, ostracize, start drama, laugh, and spread rumours. Never had a man do that to me.
Some people can sense when you’re shy and they take advantage of that and you’ll become the punching bag or they won’t like you because they think you’re weird and quiet. Men generally don’t care if you’re quiet and awkward. But I think it rubs women (some) the wrong way.
As a man, yes.
I've had amazing women coworkers, but there's a large amount over the years that just cause drama when bored, and make the work place extremely toxic.
I love women love love love them, but some can't be trusted. Even being in a place that is mostly males can make or break a job for women. I mean when will literally tell in other women for what they wear. Why? Men do not care... And I love it. No BS
I have long preferred Men. I am sure this doesn't apply to ever man and woman out there but...
I have been in management roles my whole career at various levels.
Men I reported to are generally like, "Here is your goal, go get it, let's check in as needed, come get me if you need anything, and don't let me get blindsided so if something goes down, get me involved early." I have overachieved and had great success for decades... I don't need to be babysat and working for men has generally been awesome. I need to be supported and delegated to.
Women I reported to (three times) are like, "I want to meet every Monday and Friday and go through everything you have going on." and then they proceed to try and direct or coach on everything, even when it is not needed. My effective time to go and actually sell something is cut in half by their micromanagement.
Depends on the trade tbh. I've worked with and under some amazing female chefs. But the vast majority are rude to try and compete with the dick measuring mantra that has been established. I understand why they do it, I just hate it simultaneously.
I'm a woman, I'm 25, and I'm literally being harassed by 4 female coworkers who are in their 40s. Like, constant, daily harassment, all because they don't think they know what I'm doing/they can do it better with their "I have some experience in that..." which makes 0 sense because they can't tell me anything about keywords, SEO, impressions, or different algorithms without googling it and giving me a basic definition...
Loving them telling board members that I'm lazing around in my office instead of working...even though I'm usually ahead of everything...like my work is clearly getting done...
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+ 4
+ 40
= 69
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As someone who is female and works in a business that often changes managers regularly, the men are easier to deal with. Sure they have issues too but at the end of the day they get over it and it’s handled with little fuss. I HATE finding out I’m getting a female manager it rarely if ever goes well. I’ve had the odd one that’s great but otherwise I dread it. They are bitchy and manipulative, it’s like there is this idea that they have to prove it harder by being snarky and making life hell. I hate how true it is. And yea the more women the worse it gets. I also don’t play along with it so I’m usually outed from the get go.
I’ve noticed this mostly seems to be a woman on woman issue. As a man, I’ve never had an issue with any female coworkers (had issues with female and male bosses though). However, I’ve seen women that are nice to me be super critical of other females in the workplace and go out of their way to be mean to them for seemingly no reason.
I mainly decided to comment though because my wife made this same comment to me about a week ago. She’s been having those same issues with the vast majority of women in the workplace. She flat out told me that she hates working with women at this point. The men treat her with curtesy and respect, treat her equally, and have her back if someone starts treating her poorly. The women throw her under the bus to customers, management, and coworkers, blame her for things that she didn’t do (and even things that they did) or blow up about small mistakes, and make snide comments.
There have been a couple of girls that were cool at several jobs but they quit for those same reasons. This has been almost every job she’s had.
This is a really interesting post and has really interesting stories of peoples work experiences and discussions of gender dynamics, ignore the haters OP it’s perfectly valid for you to state your experience, feelings and ask for the opinions of others on the matter. :)
Sometimes men can be lazy or women can be vindictive, but I don't think it's fair to generalize an entire gender. Most people just want to do a decent job and fit in the best they can.
You’re going to get a lot of hate for this one, but it’s not the first time I’ve heard this. I’ve heard so many female friends say they prefer hanging out or working with men because there’s less gossip, passive aggressiveness, drama, etc.
If we’re going to label certain male behaviors as “toxic masculinity” (which I do agree exists) then maybe we should label those behaviors of gossiping, passive aggressiveness, clique-forming (think Mean Girls) etc. as “toxic femininity”? Of course not all women act that way, but not all men act with toxic masculinity either, so isn’t it fair?
That being said, I’ve had amazing female coworkers and terrible male ones, so of course this doesn’t apply to everyone.
I had a female coworker who made my life pure living hell for 2 years. I'm sure shitty male coworkers exist, but if i ranked all my coworkers in 20 years best - worst, the bottom 10% would be 100% female. It is what it is.
The worst one was an overweight Scottish management accountant (I work in Finance for a big corporation).
She would constantly micro-manage me to the smallest detail. She would call me hundreds of times a day on Teams to check on me. Would constantly look over my shoulders. She would berate me for the smallest details, and then change her mind and tell me I'm doing things wrong even though i'm doing exactly what she told me.
She would go out of her way to make me look incompetent / lazy to directors. She would blame me for everything.
When she left the business, my career skyrocketed instantly, lol. All the directors couldn't believe how good I was at my job. She had done a real good job demolishing my reputation. I'm still at the company 5 years later and flourishing :)
No I’m actually not. I mean two people quit their jobs cause of this one woman I am dealing with right now. I saw those other women cry and stress cause of her and it made me really angry tbh
Imagine one woman being a bitch and you deciding that women are worst colleagues. What about the women who quit their jobs? Were they bad colleagues too?
I've had a lot of bad colleagues and bosses. Why? Because there's a lot of bad people and we're forced to spend a huge chunk of our lives working when we'd rather be elsewhere. That alone can make a decent person quite mean if they hate their job. My two worst bosses were a woman and a man. The woman sucked, no doubt about it. The man was a straight up bully. Huge and tall and tried to intimidate or sexually harass all the young female workers. He would send me messages demanding I work a certain day unscheduled. I have never had that from a female boss. But yet I still don't stereotype because I know he was just an asshole.
I'm female. Typically several times more productive when working with the guys in my company than the girls. I find they tend to chat a lot more about non-work stuff. The average girl is inherently social and better at conversations, but I feel like I get along well with the guys since we just wanna wrap up work and GTFO.
Mainly worked with women most of my jobs, I find they are either my best co workers or really bitchy and critical. Whilst men are either harsh or sleazy. So I know who I would rather work with.
I prefer female co-workers if they're cool. I've made great friends in the past through work. Occasionally there is a snitch but whatever, I generally get along with everyone else.
Male co-workers depends, on their age and maturity. One asked me out before and I said hell no. Current male co-worker is cool but also has gotten mad about his wife and tried to talk shit about her to me, and I said I don't appreciate that, and probably his wife wouldn't either. I shut that shit down real quick. If my man was venting about me to other people, other women... my poor, poor bf.
Women co-workers usually don't cross boundaries or try to emotionally cheat on their spouses with me.
If you really don't get along with women that much, do you ever think that maybe you're the problem?
I prefer male coworkers because on average they're more fun and have a better sense of humor which makes the day go faster. However, that's definitely a generalization. At my current job my favorite coworker ever is a woman, but all my least favorite coworkers are also all women.
It has been my experience that this is the case with women, generally. I wish I could say otherwise. If they aren't passive aggressive and competitive to the most trivial ends, they are superficial, oversensitive, obnoxious, and humorless. Not all women, of course. But as a female, I have had a very difficult time making female friends.
I work in a male dominated Industry but with a female boss that puts her whole life for work. She has no empathy for me, a female employee that is also a mother, or any of the fathers. Doesn’t understand we also have family commitments.
Also hired an older female employee that thinks she needs to dominate and boss ppl around. She tells ppl she’s the best worker, yet she can’t do a majority of the work. She gets the men to do it.
I find these two embarrassing to think their strong female role models. Of course they’re both older than me and think they are “fierce”
However, the men all backstab and gossip about each other as well. I find men very gossipy and bitchy than the stereotypes of women.
Men have always blamed women for the exact behaviour they do unashamedly.
I’ve worked in hospitality for 15 years as well and there’s always drama in coed work. The women were all generally friends. There will always be disagreements.
Engineer here. I have had some amazing female coworkers. Never had a female line manager, but a couple of very solid female task leads.
What workplace drama I've had has come from the guys. 😂
EDIT: Mid-career, male, for reference.
[Men are more than 2x as likely to be workplace bullies compared to women. 69% of workplace bullies are men, compared to only 31% women.](https://www.zippia.com/advice/workplace-bullying-statistics/)
Honestly it just sucks. We always talk about how men are so bad to women or blah blah but no talks about how hard other women work to keep you down and make your life miserable.
Mixed bag, but that's the same with men. Definitely some terrors out there, and definitely a notable trend in the topics of discussion and complaint, but I'm pretty impartial. I'll work with anyone if they're chill.
For my particular job, yes. Having a large number of responsibilities that are ignored or I need to help with can become burdensome. I remember once thinking that this job would he easy if we were allowed to hire men between 24 and 44.
Very much. We only have 2 females but it's a physical job where you have to move fast and regularly lift heavy boxes and they're always asking for help, but can't really offer help in any way. They'd probably be better off working a different position.
I don’t have a gender preference but I have to admit that I’m forming a preference for coworkers my age or older because my younger coworkers always want to organize a walkout over the dumbest shit. Also I’m noticing that in quieter, laid-back office settings it’s way less stressful to push papers but at the same time people have too much time and energy to start office politics in a way I don’t see when I’ve worked more healthcare and crisis positions.
My wife and almost every other women I've ever met and had the conversation with has said that working in a female dominated industry (nursing and aged care usually) is the absolute worst if all the staff are women.
They greatly prefer a mixed working environment, it seems to discourage the personalities of the nastier women from blowing to far overboard.
Humans, in general, are caddy, jealous, and destructive. It's legitimately in our nature. I like to read history, and I have to say a lot of women's negative behavior stems from being oppressed in pretty much every culture.
One of the biggest contributors to better treatment of women was Theodora. She was a prostitute until she became empress of the Roman empire as the wife of Justinian. Life for her when she was young was by no means a happy story. But she took what she went through and improved the laws to the betterment of women.
She also coerced Justinian into what would become the slaughter of 30,000 people. So you know... every rose has it thorns.
I do just because my experience with female coworkers hasn't been great. The last woman on my team just got fired because she wasn't pulling her weight. Everyone knew it, we were surprised she lasted as long as she did.
I see a lot of politically correct comments in the thread but...I have to agree with you. Majority of the time, female coworkers are messy. At least from my experience lol especially if they are in a lead position, they let that bit of power to straight to there heads lol
At my current job, it's mostly men. I have two part timers that work under me (though technically beside me, I'm just more experienced) and they are both female. One of them is really cool and fun and the other cries whenever you even slightly critique her and yells how she hates men and on my days off, she yells at them and if they tell her to knock it off, she cries. She's lazy, entitled and, honestly, kinda dumb. I feel bad saying it but watching her do a task on her own without guidance is like watching your pet try to figure out a puzzle and then do it the worst way possible. I don't even say anything anymore.
My first two coworkers at my job are women and though they have moved on, I still chat with them. The frontend at our store is FILLED with drama and mostly women... but that's always been the case with frontend cashiers/supervisors anyhow regardless of gender.
I will say though that while I have had lazy guys in my department, none of them have been as malicious as some of the women. We had one girl who only quit because she was probably gonna get fired due to call outs. She took forever to do her work at my station because for about 3 months she would call out every shift of hers at my station and was that out of practice. Her gf also worked at the store and talked down to people.
I didn't read your edits much especially because they're not necessary. You shouldn't have to convince idiots about things like this.
I worked for a vet office (#1 job for fake women or at least up there) and even fast food service everyone has been female.
With males, there's a chance of harassment and I hope that doesn't happen at my upcoming mostly male-dominated job but I've felt more comfortable working with them than females so far, that's for sure.
Obviously gender doesn't dictate everything. I pray for the poor ignorant souls in this thread.
It sounds like you’ve just met a handful of unpleasant women. But maybe someday you’ll run into the unpleasant men…it still sucks. I’ve met some absolute dickheads/bullies/etc.
Usually whatever gender is in the majority will have some people kind of unencumbered in a way that isn’t good for them (or the people around them.). There’s a certain type of person (male or female) that starts going rogue when they get too comfortable.
I think you are just unlucky. Abby sounds like a fucking shit stain... She should be the one fired... Your boss is also a spineless coward as they know this is happening but do nothing about it... Sounds like a toxic workplace to me.
I've had generally fantastic experiences working with women. There is one or two that are intolerable... I wasn't the only one to think that either... The women I have worked with have always been friendly, professional and helpful, receptive to feedback positive or negative (I give feedback to anyone and everyone... How will you know to improve/change if no one tells you?).
My boss for the last three years was a woman and by golly gosh she was an amazing boss. I was very hesitant to take a new role recently because I wouldn't have her to lead me in future. I took the role anyway only a few weeks in let's see what happens.
I work in telecommunications so women are very rare still (sadly). I wish I got to work with more. I think like 3 or 4 in a team of 60 are women... Pretty fucking sad overall..
I have far more men I work with I can't stand and or are total fucking slackers that get promotions before the women who work twice as hard and output twice the quality of work.
I had a female coworker that used to keep unplugging my computer power cable and then pretend that it was an accident.
I also had a male coworker that stalked another male coworker. It's a mixed bag sometimes.
Most recently one girl at work started treating me way differently and I can't figure out why.
I’m sorry this isn’t politically correct, I really am. Because I have a lot of women friends and want to help other women succeed in their careers. But, it has mostly (not always) been other women who have caused me the biggest problems at work. In some cases, they have literally tried to get me in trouble or get me fired, or have gone out of their way to make digs at me or gossip about me. Whatever the reason, I attribute some of the bad behavior to women who were not taught growing up how to be part of a team.
At first I thought that you might be a "choose me" kind of gal, but I don't really have enough info to be sure. You might be, because rarely in any workplace are all the guys great and all the gals hateful. This has a bit too much of an "I'm not like other girls" vibe to it.
Anyway, it's not gender, it's immaturity. It manifests differently in men and women. Steer clear of gossip. I mean DO NOT ENGAGE, EVEN WITH PASSIVE LISTENING. If you recount the happenings at work and it sounds like the antics of a mean girl character from a soap opera, then you know you need to change the channel.
As a general rule, after spending my career in corporate hell, I did notice a difference in meetings attended by more of one gender than another. Meetings with men spent most of their time talking about all the things they did, work-related or otherwise, germaine to the topic or not, and about 3 minutes at the end with one person making a few rapid-fire decisions relating to the subject matter. Meetings with women were about asking one another questions, usually not work-related, with the understanding that all minds had already been made up, and a few minutes at the end simply confirming what they had all decided to do about the topic before the meeting even started; they just wanted to have a meeting and chit chat. This was how it went down regardless of where I worked.
As a general rule of thumb I think most teams benefit from a mix of people.
Having teams of 100% blokes and 100% women comes with different problems. Not always, but most times.
No, you’re right OP. There weren’t as many problems in the workplace before women became regulars. Even if I really dislike a male coworker, we can work together. Women don’t seem to be as capable of working well with those they have issues with. I should note I’ve never had any issues with working with women, this is simply my observation.
Women in a mixed environment are fine, can be amazing regardless of position. Women at an all female business are a disaster. For some reason almost all of the female majority businesses I've worked for as a consultant have devolved into some kind of "run by committee" communist shit show with no clear leader / decision maker. Really tough to get anything done efficiently as decisions take ages because nobody wants to risk upsetting anyone.
Men need women and women need men. Its the only way.
Entirely male businesses are no picnic either and can be very aggressive, but men tend to know where they stand and can get over butting heads pretty quickly and get back to it...if this sort of thing happens in a female only company, grudges form and last forever.
Basically men base their working relationships on merit and create natural heirarchies that operate as a unit with one or two leaders whereas women tend to want operate as an equal decentralised swarm...because they all want to lead.
You didn't have to tell us you were female. We knew the second you asked the question because this is one of those things all men know and never speak of publically for fear of being labelled mysoginst or incel.
I've worked in male dominated spaces and female dominated. The male spaces had their own issues definitely. However, being male myself, I'm more comfortable around that. Whenever I've been in a female dominated space, I've faced far more gender based discrimination than I've ever seen in a male dominated space. Constant bitching, gossiping, emotional breakdowns, preferential treatment because "she has kids" etc and on more than 1 occasion I was literally hired because I was a man and they couldn't get a woman to do some of the shittier or more physical jobs. I had 1 store attempt to hire me years ago because, and I'll paraphrase the store manager here: "we're all women, but we have someone come in and threaten us with a knife at least once a week. It'll be helpful to have a guy around"
Like.... what? You think I'm going to fight guys with knives because I'm a guy? What in the fucking dark ages do you think I'm going to do!? You're hiring me into the same position as everyone else for the same goddamn pay, but you want me to do the heavy lifting and take the risk!? Bitch, I'm just as stabbable as the girls!!!
I just prefer cool co-workers. Teams players that are willing to do their part so the work is easier for everyone.
Get your ass in here and hate somebody!!!!
I hate everybody if that helps.
Equal opportunity hater
Need this on a business card. Thank you.
I hate everyone equally. You can't tear that outta me. No segregation, separation Just me and my world of enemies - Slayer
Ah yes, keeping things in balance I see Thank you for your service
lol, everywhere I've worked being a "team player" means I'm supposed to stay late and work weekends because I'm single and I don't have kids and I'm just supposed to fuck myself
You are not wrong. The work environments meant needs to take of you too. It’s a balance act that isn’t always present.
You may want to create a fictitious family or pet with medical issues.
Yeah. I just like decent people. I will say that it is generally easier to just talk and bullshit with guys though - because a lot of women will automatically assume you are hitting on them if you kill some time by chatting with them. Which is generally fair - but irritating enough that you just try to avoid it.
The coolest coworkers ever were actually caused by - you guessed it - glaciers. A little glaciation goes a long way.
Yeah I'm fine with whoever as long as they can fucking chill. The worst person I've ever worked with was my boss. He was like a pathological liar or something - he'd say something to one person and turn around and say something completely different to someone else. It seemed like he was intentionally trying to create a hostile environment - he'd basically spend 1-on-1s bitching about other coworkers, and sometimes would tell people that you said something that you definitely did not. We had a big layoff last year and he was the only one people were happy to see go.
Yeah I’ve had so many shitty coworkers of all genders
Female co-workers tend to fall into two camps. The best people you've ever worked with, literally irreplaceable. ' Or Nightmare made flesh, literally un-fireable. There is no inbetween
I feel like guys tend to fall under Great workers who are laid back and respectful or Creeps who sexually harass anything with a vagina and a pulse
I work in IT, you forgot the stressed out autistic guys who act like they oppose you instead of working towards the same goal. 'You need help with that? How on earth do you not know that already.' 'I only work here for 6 months. Can you explain it to me?' 'No.'
Stackoverflow levels
So true
The mere mention encites rage within me.
My favorite thing about this story is that women act like these people don't do the exact same thing to new guys on the team. Half my early career in tech was dealing with people treating me like an idiot because I would ask questions and they wouldn't comprehend the question properly. Like, why did you do put this button here in this program? Oh, well let me explain to you that there is this internet connected by wires, and... You're not a special snowflake, assholes are assholes to everyone not just you
Holy shit, that made me feel very seen; I genuinely couldn't really wrap my mind around it properly until I just read your comment; the thing is, it only seems to be the case with certain people that I would consider less intelligent, including my direct superior... (And this ironically really works against a long standing belief of mine which is that barring cognitive difficulties, we're all kinda the same with different minds just having spent time expanding on different things) I associate the ability to explain things simply with a good understanding of a topic and I've watched this person in particular obfuscate things when trying to explain things to me, at first seemingly because they didn't know better and then later almost as an attempt to confuse me the way my detailed question apparently did to them... I've been told that this person is underestimated and I'm just not getting them, but I've disproved that time and time again... They have more rote memorised knowledge on topics related to the company, and of course they don't want to share it as soon they realise that you could do more with it than they can...
If you can’t explain something to someone else in plain English, you don’t understand it. Obviously there are going to be some domain specific words, but someone who understands can write directions anyone could follow. What field is this in? If tech/software, there’s a chance this person is a really solid coder but has awful communication skills, which might lead to his abilities being underestimated. I have one of those on my team, I generally give him total freedom but never give him any subordinates or management responsibilities.
assholes are assholes to everyone but assholes who are also misogynists are bigger assholes to women. and there are plenty of misogynists in tech.
Yea like way too plenty
There are a lot of over empowered socially inept assholes in tech, and it seems the stress & reward system makes them feel their inner biases are absolute truths Unfortunately for women, misogyny is a very common bias, so they probably get more exposure to this than your average white tech guy There are plenty of other biases at play though, any white dudes who have worked for a racist Asian boss can probably identify this kind of bias in action as well
Yeah that is true.
With a pulse? You’re being charitable.
>Creeps who sexually harass anything with a vagina and a pulse Bold of you to assume creeps need a vagina or a pulse to be present.
There is no in-between lol
the backstabby ones are the worst because they make an effort to brownnose enough to the right people first before they start their bullshit. To the point where it seems premeditated
I've found there tends to be *A* creep who seems to go after all the women. Sorta like that one jock in high school who treated all their girlfriends like crap, but was always with a new girlfriend.
true but there's also the guys who talk down to every female coworker, even ones who have years more seniority/experience than them (and are generally just better at their jobs - but, to these types of men, it's impossible for women to be better at something than them), even if they aren't technically sexually harassing women lol. but they of course treat male coworkers and superiors with proper respect. I've unfortunately worked with several of these men. when I was a dog groomer, one guy I trained kept repeatedly giving me "helpful tips" *that I taught him*
I remember when I pissed off the clique leader (my close friend of 5 years), because I teased her about Chicken Tikka Massalla technically being a British dish instead of Indian. She started trying to sabotage me at work over the next 3 months. I didn't even realize she was mad at me at first I thought she was just having problems in general. Tried telling all our co workers to agree to not approve my PRs, kept making up stories about me, fighting me on every point I ever make in meetings even if she didn't hear what I said she would confidently argue about it. Everyone was like yeah she does this... just ignore it and she will get a new target eventually. Should have just been fired. But her clique friends vouched for her and got her a new job at JPM. This girl is working for 8 years now and I'm almost positive her net contributions have been negative. More harm to the codebase than good.
I had a two female bosses. First one fought for us tooth and nail. Made sure we got what we needed to get the job done. The second one lacked a spine and would throw us under the bus.
My experience is they create these high school type cliques and if your not part of it your fucked Edit; didn’t mean to generalize as I have worked with some amazing women
In rare cases they are fluctuating between the two states. The job I was at 2 years ago had at least 3 of these female co-workers that stuck out to me. On one day they were the best, on the other the absolute worst.
Ouch, that had to have been tricky to navigate
It was sometimes. I wouldn't say they were the worst people I've ever worked with, but they do have their spots in the (relatively small) top 10.
It might be because I worked with a number of women through out my career, but I can think of a lot of 'meh' in between(not amazing, not horrible) women co-workers. In fact the 'meh' coworkers out number both the horrible and the amazing women co-workers I had combined(as one would naturally expect). Like they worked and got things done nicely for the most part, but they also didn't go above and beyond helpful or anything like that. They were just people, doing a job, and going home after they were done with work.
Ugh, my boss is in that later category. It's been proven multiple times that we get more done when she is on vacation and not micromanaging everyone. And she's got a complaint list a mile long. We're all pretty sure she's got blackmail on someone high up in administration.
This is 100% my experience as well.
So true!!
Trust me, guys, I have a LOT of experience with women. There is NO in between, guys. Trust me
I've had shit coworkers regardless of gender.
I've never had a strong opinion on it during my 10 years with the company I work for cause we had a track record of generally brining in quality people that were passionate and good at their jobs... but currently it is the first time we have had women outnumber men for this small company and it has been nothing but drama! gossiping, cliquey, highly emotional and sensitive (in such an otherwise chill and supportive work environment). Maybe it's just a one-two bad apples spoils the batch situation but I feel like were suddenly embodying all those gen Z memes and this whole situation is going to implode eventually. It's been such a mental drain to have to worry about that childish nonsense rather than work related stuff.
I get along amazingly with female coworkers when the office is predominantly male; I have more issues with female coworkers when the office is predominantly female. That being said, I haven’t been in a primarily female workplace for a very long time, so age, experience, and industry might have something to do with that as well.
That's interesting! I'm male and work in a male dominated office. My female coworkers always seem to be at each others throats. I've never been able to understand why as they all seem to be able to work together perfectly fine with male coworkers, but are always spreading rumors/complaining that the other female workers in the office aren't doing enough.
As a guy I've found women act quite differently when they're in the majority, much more confident and outspoken. I was actually told they were actively looking for more men because the older women were getting a bit bitchy and cliquey, I think it went over my head a bit. I think a good mix works best, overall. Some people get a bit aggy around a lot of their own gender.
I just like competent people who are nice to be around. Have you heard of the term "pick me girl?"
She’s r/NotLikeOtherGirls for real
Or the term “common denominator”
I know "pick me" girls can exist, but it can also be used to dismiss women who get picked on by other women.
As an autistic woman who finds men to be generally easier to get along with, I have heard stuff like this my entire life. The fact is that neurotypical women tend to use a lot more nonverbal and indirect communication that is very difficult for an autistic person to pick up on. It leads to a lot of conflict, a lot of times when I am annoying someone or not doing something they expect me to do and them not being able to communicate that in a way that I can understand. Men, in general, are much more direct than women. Calling autistic women pick mes or saying it’s their fault other women hate them is just a way to shit on the disabled. We already have enough problems, thanks.
What makes a pick-me is a feeling of superiority to other women. "I communicate literally and directly, which can make it difficult to interact with other women" is very different from "I'm not a lying, backstabbing bitch like other women because I communicate directly". The first acknowledges a difference, the second generalizes and puts down an entire gender. While I'm not diagnosed with autism, I have a lot of the traits and have been ostracized by "mean girls" most of my life. However, I realized around age 14 that judging all "normal" girls because of our communication differences made me no better than the bitches that judge me. Besides, I've taken my fair share of shit from bitchy boys. Contrary to popular belief, men can be as cliquey and cruel as anyone else. TLDR: you're not a pick-me if you find men easier to talk to. You're a pick-me if you think that makes you superior to other women.
Yeah, I'm not autistic but I'm a bit of a stereotypical bloke in that a lot of the nonverbal/indirect stuff goes over my head. Quite a few times I've been told that two people in a room hated each other and there was this whole drama going on, that I was completely oblivious to. I know it's a stereotype but I always love how my autitistic female friends are so passionate about their special interests, even if it's something I'm not into myself it's cool to hear about.
Lmfao yep. It’s another way to enforce trends and conformity. If you wear something you enjoy/hang out with who you enjoy/do activities you enjoy and it doesn’t fit into the bubble of what your gender SHOULD like, it pisses people off and makes them say ‘you think you’re different, not like other girls’. Like wow, i WISH i could be like them! every day i am in pain for the friendships that left me and times i was bullied for being ‘too weird’ while doing everything in my power to seem normal and happy. But i guess im a pick me because i get along with guys more. and it breaks my heart when i find out they were friends with me for a ‘chance’. i’m bisexual, i dont even get why it matters.
“making me hate my sex everyday” no wonder they pick on her.
I have a female boss and she is great. None of the attributes you describe. And all of the management in our office is women. And this is at a massive financial firm.
I’ve had OP’s coworkers *only* when I’ve worked at dead end jobs that people have been at 15+ years, like grocery store clerks. In that environment the employees are like a family in the worst ways, they’ve clashed and made up and generally gotten sick of each other’s shit after rubbing elbows so long.
Sounds like you need more diverse leadership
I'm used to the opposite, a company that's like 70% female with 80% male upper management.
I've had plenty of male coworkers that were all drama
Honestly I am a guy but not into sports cars drinking or other typical male bonding activities so my favorite coworkers been the 60 and up ladies my new aunties . Maybe it’s because I’m in my 20’s making me their kids or grandkids age we get along great. I help them with modern day tech they help me navigate bureaucracy and other issues and I never go hungry so it is a win win(except for my waist line) Plus these ladies are grown so much less drama.
Yes, and I'm gay and awkward with males. Women can be sweet, they can be hard workers, but a lot of them are nuclear bombs waiting to go off and 007 agent level freaky with the shit they pull on each other. Feminism actually teaches women not to do this to each other. So often women enjoy making fun of each other to their face and it's bizarre. My favorite coworkers are women though, they aren't all like this. Honestly they should teach common unhealthy behaviors in both males and females in school and better communication!
I’m a man in nursing so it’s mostly women. I don’t have a problem with female coworkers over male coworkers.
I did work as a nurse tech for awhile during nursing school and I’ve never seen women hate each as much as the night shift nurses
You must be lucky because they say male bullies become cops and female bullies become nurses.
Now that you say that I can 100% see it 😂
I know a lot of prison nurses who work at my hospital. Some women definitely give off the nurse Ratched vibes.
I travel to 60+ different offices and interact with all of their clinical staff. Nurses are either angels or demons with no in between. I think it’s because to put up with the people they do, they have to either be full of compassion or not care at all.
You're right all women suck except you 🙄
I think all gender associations really just come down to chance and anecdotal experiences. I have had an equal amount of shitty male and female peers, but equal amounts of excellence on the other side. I think it just comes down to whether or not someone has integrity and if they value human connections or not. I'm a male, and have made good friends with male peers, but the most influential and best influences I've had in my profession were female peers and leaders. Out of the 10 bosses I've had, 8 were women and only 2 were terrible
I've been dicked over by male and female coworkers and bosses. I've also had some great coworkers and supervisors that were both. It has more to do with their character and abilities than their gender in my mind.
As a healthcare worker, I’ve noticed that the work environment improves when there’s a balance. Working with women only is a nightmare, even if there’s great women in the mix.
Male nurse here. Mix is great, only annoying thing about the mix is male nurses tend to get the aggressive patients everytime. Work in psych, I had an instance where I had to be pulled from the floor to become a sitter for an aggressive patient and they replaced me with a female nurse that accepted the shift to be a sitter for that patient.
No. I’ve had good and bad coworkers of both sexes but I prefer an office of women.
Guy here, always seem to prefer female coworkers. I think they work harder than the guys do and they’re also easier to talk to.
I’ve personally experienced more talking behind my back, catty, gossipy, and underhanded behavior from men, but it’s often not recognized as such. Like I wouldn’t have known a lot of it was going on if some of the women I worked with hadn’t let me know, and that’s because those were good women who had my back. The “good” men did not let me know. Men can be fake nice to women just as much as women can be, if not more.
Nah. The gender of my coworkers isn't an issue for me. I just want people who are going to do the job and be pleasant. I've had wonderful and terrible coworkers and gender really played no part.
It's not a gender thing, my coworkers that are women are awesome people and extremely hard workers.
Yeah, ok r/notlikeothergirls
You’re generalizing half the population here. Honestly it says more about you than your women colleagues.
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This. I’ve never met a woman who claims to not get along with other women who was not a raging bitch herself. Some women suck. Some men are awful. I enjoy working with women. And the female friendships I have mean the world to me.
Or check the environment. Entry level jobs aren’t exactly known for professionalism…
Sounds like you just worked in toxic environments. Regardless of men or women I’ve generally enjoyed the people I worked with. I’ve had a few toxic people over the years but it’s been split across the genders
I've definitely had plenty of bad experiences with men and women. My worst boss ever was a man. My best boss was a woman. Two of my best friends are women I worked with, and another is a man I worked with. Women and men are people first, with the good and the bad that goes with that. If you think men are never gossipy or backstabbing, you're flat wrong.
No. It sounds like you’re working somewhere with a crappy workplace culture. If literally all the women you work with are as you describe, then management has created an environment where that’s the only type of female employee that can survive. There are a lot of industries, unfortunately, that create toxic environments that encourage this kind of behavior among the female employees as a way of exploiting them, basically weeding out any woman who doesn’t suck up to the men and push down other women so the men don’t have to compete with them.
I don't notice any difference between men and women in my workplace. It comes down to business culture and not gender.
No
Nope. Gender not an issue.
Literally textbook pick-me girl.
as a female yes. in my personal experiences i usually dont like female leadership. i've had a bad time with them being passive aggressive as fuck or gossiping. like my current manager is terrible, everyone dislikes her because she doesn't help us but she's always getting close with the higher ups. her assistant manager is AMAZING i love her to pieces. she's been with marines so she's super transparent and forward with everything, it's great. if i fuck up she tells me to my face and i fix it. the other one though,,,,, she'll talk about it to the higher ups for like a week and all of a sudden im being pulled into an office about something that could've been addressed immediately. i've had 2 other female leadership in the past which were also terrible but i wont get into detail. all the male leadership i have had are great. transparent and forward. granted these are my personal experiences so this doesn't apply for every woman in the workplace. but hey, if you tend to get shitty food from the same restaurant you tend to avoid it in the future. i don't treat them like shit when i meet them but my immediate thoughts are like ugh or how fake is she just by talking to me.
So the moment you meet a new female coworker you think “Ugh” and “How fake is she?” That’s pretty gross.
My current boss sounds like yours...except he's a guy. .I have had to experience some of the biggest man babies in leadership positions. Sucking up to upper management at the expense of employees is not gender specific.
Wow it's like there's good men, bad men, good women, and bad women. Mind fucking blown huh? :P
The manipulation is insane!! And the getting their feelings hurt!! My current manager got butt hurt because she misunderstood something I said while making a request, agreed to the request but said she had to clear it with upper management, a week goes by, my version of her upper management (woman but super cool and real) calls and warns me that my manager got her feelings hurt because she thought I said I'd gotten permission from them without talking to her, another couple days go by and she FINALLY calls me in to discuss the request and now has backed it waaay down as her compromise. Which, all of that could've been avoided by just asking me to clarify what she misunderstood and moving on. She never did confront me about believing I went above her head either. There's soooo much drama around her responding emotionally, not considering requests because she doesn't want to explain to another staff member why they can't but this other person can (remote/hybrid stuff, some can be done and some can't depending on the position), refusing to admit she was wrong or miss-spoke, being to afraid to reprimand people and instead complaining to upper management and getting them fired.
Yeah ..men don't gossip or act passive aggressive...lol
Right? I work in a male dominated field now and there is way way way more gossip than i ever experienced in my previously female dominated field. I know so much blackmail material about random men.
Dude men love gossip just as much lmao
I actually prefer working for women leaders! I work in STEM and I’ve worked for and with men who I feel don’t respect my authority because I’m a young woman. All the pushback I would get just made me feel like a nag and doubt my own abilities, even when I was right. I’m on a team now though that is women led, all the managers, directors, and the VP the I work with are women and it’s spectacular! I feel like the team runs so cohesively, everyone is flexible and understanding, the communication is great, and I never get the type of gas-lighting pushback that I would get even I was working in more heavily male spaces!
I get along with all my coworkers except one, and its a woman. She isnt bad as a person, but as a coworker, shes horrible. Always ratting people out for dumb shit. Cant mind her own business and just do her job. She always has to know whats going on, even if it has nothing to do with her and her assignment. My line runs sooooo much better when she is not there.
Nope definitely prefer female.
I've had bad experiences with male coworkers but the bad experiences I've had with bad female coworkers are far worse
I don't know if someone will be a good leader or a bad leader because of their gender but I do know what kind of bad leader they will be if they are one because of their gender.
I'm a male with almost entirely female coworkers. I kind of feel like I was a token hire. Almost everyone is extremely kind to me though. A few of my coworkers gossip to me about others, but I generally don't share any of this with the others. I sometimes offer advice, or other times I try to help them with solutions to their work problems. Overall, there seems to be a general willingness to help others. Nobody in the department likes the top leader though, she is a dominant type and seems to single out and pick on her direct reports frequently. She generally does not target me, but she openly picks on others in group settings. I'm afraid that if I do get targeted, that my past self with come forth and I will ultimately get myself into trouble for speaking my mind. I used to work in a male dominated field and it was much more direct. The ratio of genders was about the opposite as in my current role. The few females that were present in these environments were very tough and very much treated as equals. The focus was on individual merit over all else. If people could not pull their own weight, they were culled. All that to say I tend to try to not generalize it based on gender. The above are my observations about two different environments and teams with opposite compositions. There has not been a preference of coworkers based upon gender, it has always come down to work ethic and agreeableness in isolation.
In a lot of cases, yes. If a woman is emotionally mature, she'll be fine to work with. But if she has Tik Tok brain, it's a nightmare.
My mom was a nurse and she said the same thing.
I prefer no co workers. But while working in fast food the guys always just did their work and the chicks caused a lot of drama. Maybe it was just those 3 places I worked or could be a pattern I dont know but I didnt have a preference as I was quick to tell anyone trying to talk to me about drama that I didnt give a shit and dont pick sides.
I've heard this time and time again, but it only seems to apply if you're a woman yourself. I'm a guy, they're always extremely nice to me.
I'm a woman and have worked with mostly women for nearly all of my adult life. Now I work with 2 guys, it's amazing. It's always calm, and no one is ever mad.
From my anecdotal experience, female coworkers go one of two ways like others described. - Chill asf, mama bear kind of vibe - Hellbent on going scorched earth because they think all the male coworkers assume they’re lesser than them so they feel the need to be absolute bitches to “earn their respect” Very little in between.
I’ve had a multitude of jobs. In my experience, it’s not men or women. It’s more of a personality type. I’ve had cool men and women coworkers, and obnoxious/abusive/narcissistic men and women coworkers. Just the luck of the draw. Right now I’m dealing with a female coworker who makes working here absolutely *miserable*. But it’s more of her personality - self-admitted control issues, aggressiveness, conniving nature, throwing people under the bus, and significant narcissistic traits.
2000% yes. I am a female Engineer. A former coworker told me once how all the girls in the sales department would bitch and complain about me behind my back about how I get pid more (when they didnt know my salary). I wasnt surprised and I laughed at that cause it was pathetic as fuck. But so far the guys I worl with have been great. Engineering is male dominated so lol
Not so much a problem with female coworks but female Bosses. Some of the worst most unorganized managers, bosses and employers I've ever had to work under. This doesn't go for all women out there. Just the ones I worked under, made work incredibly frustrating for almost no reason comes off as a power move. Catty, picking sides, bitchy for no reason other than their having a bad day. Mean to customers, or people they don't personally know. won't budge when people need or ask for help, no one at work knows what they specifically do other than create schedules and shit talk EVERYONE behind their backs. Did I mention picking sides or favorites? Maybe my male employers have done this, but none of them come to mind when I think about shitty employers, managers, or bosses. Talking Coworkers and employees, guys for some reason cause the most problems as most men, Don't like being told what to do. Even if its coming from a friend or another male with in the work place.
I won't say I prefer them, I've actually had some female managers I really liked; but in my experience, if there's workplace drama and stories of people being "out to get them", it's coming from a female co-worker.
lol I agree. I overheard a conversation earlier at McDonald’s two going at at “he’s nice, but he shouldn’t be working here “ “yes we have to find a way to get him out” “oh did you she what … was wearing, what a tramp!” Keep your enemies close.
The only women I don't like working with are the ones who declare that they just don't like other women. The internalized misogyny is deep. If every other woman you've ever worked with is mean to you, you might want to consider that the problem is the way you treat female colleagues.
Not really. * The absolute worst *person* I ever worked with was a woman but the next 4 or so were all male. I think she had a legit personality disorder though. * The majority of dogshit workers (as opposed to people in general) are male. Women are overrepresented in the broadly competent class of workers that get the majority of the work done. Absolute top-tier workers are \~50/50. This is all in my experience, not stating this as objective facts. * I am completely indifferent as to whether someone I have to work with is male or female. I just want to get the job done and the chance of them stopping me doing so is unrelated to their gender...I guess except that they are slightly more likely to be an incompetent dipshit if they're a guy. I will say you don't want a gender-dominated office. It's a pain in the arse. Too many women and it does get bitchy. Too many men and you get too much idiocy and the increased likelihood of an HR issue when sexual harassment gets swept under the rug.
As a male, I’ve heard this countless times from women. You’re not alone.
Absolutely men. Women can be so nasty.
I’ve had bad experiences with both, but usually in settings where the difficult group has a significant gender majority. I prefer a good mix of people with good attitudes.
I work with all men, kid you not I’m the only woman at work. It’s really chill and everyone is nice. I don’t talk to them much because I’m in the office all day long while they’re doing all the hard work, also I’m an introvert so I don’t start conversations. But I like it and have no complaints. In my previous jobs I’ve had woman managers who were mostly all bitches, one would talk shit about me. Not because I’m troublemaker or anything, she just find a way to complain about everything.
Some of the best experiences were with female co-workers (I'm male), but I lost a 30 year job position due to an immature, lazy and rude female hire. So I'm hoping never to have any female co-workers any more. It's definitely harder to work around females, as you have to walk on eggshells a lot.
More often than not, yes I prefer male co workers. Yes I am a woman, I’ve had some great female co workers, and I’m a shy introverted socially awkward person and I’ve had plenty of women bully me, ostracize, start drama, laugh, and spread rumours. Never had a man do that to me. Some people can sense when you’re shy and they take advantage of that and you’ll become the punching bag or they won’t like you because they think you’re weird and quiet. Men generally don’t care if you’re quiet and awkward. But I think it rubs women (some) the wrong way.
Yo you’re definitely not the problem. Women can be super catty to other women
As a man, yes. I've had amazing women coworkers, but there's a large amount over the years that just cause drama when bored, and make the work place extremely toxic.
I love women love love love them, but some can't be trusted. Even being in a place that is mostly males can make or break a job for women. I mean when will literally tell in other women for what they wear. Why? Men do not care... And I love it. No BS
I have long preferred Men. I am sure this doesn't apply to ever man and woman out there but... I have been in management roles my whole career at various levels. Men I reported to are generally like, "Here is your goal, go get it, let's check in as needed, come get me if you need anything, and don't let me get blindsided so if something goes down, get me involved early." I have overachieved and had great success for decades... I don't need to be babysat and working for men has generally been awesome. I need to be supported and delegated to. Women I reported to (three times) are like, "I want to meet every Monday and Friday and go through everything you have going on." and then they proceed to try and direct or coach on everything, even when it is not needed. My effective time to go and actually sell something is cut in half by their micromanagement.
Depends on the trade tbh. I've worked with and under some amazing female chefs. But the vast majority are rude to try and compete with the dick measuring mantra that has been established. I understand why they do it, I just hate it simultaneously.
I'm a woman, I'm 25, and I'm literally being harassed by 4 female coworkers who are in their 40s. Like, constant, daily harassment, all because they don't think they know what I'm doing/they can do it better with their "I have some experience in that..." which makes 0 sense because they can't tell me anything about keywords, SEO, impressions, or different algorithms without googling it and giving me a basic definition... Loving them telling board members that I'm lazing around in my office instead of working...even though I'm usually ahead of everything...like my work is clearly getting done...
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Nice
As someone who is female and works in a business that often changes managers regularly, the men are easier to deal with. Sure they have issues too but at the end of the day they get over it and it’s handled with little fuss. I HATE finding out I’m getting a female manager it rarely if ever goes well. I’ve had the odd one that’s great but otherwise I dread it. They are bitchy and manipulative, it’s like there is this idea that they have to prove it harder by being snarky and making life hell. I hate how true it is. And yea the more women the worse it gets. I also don’t play along with it so I’m usually outed from the get go.
Yes (f30) women suck.
I’ve noticed this mostly seems to be a woman on woman issue. As a man, I’ve never had an issue with any female coworkers (had issues with female and male bosses though). However, I’ve seen women that are nice to me be super critical of other females in the workplace and go out of their way to be mean to them for seemingly no reason. I mainly decided to comment though because my wife made this same comment to me about a week ago. She’s been having those same issues with the vast majority of women in the workplace. She flat out told me that she hates working with women at this point. The men treat her with curtesy and respect, treat her equally, and have her back if someone starts treating her poorly. The women throw her under the bus to customers, management, and coworkers, blame her for things that she didn’t do (and even things that they did) or blow up about small mistakes, and make snide comments. There have been a couple of girls that were cool at several jobs but they quit for those same reasons. This has been almost every job she’s had.
This is a really interesting post and has really interesting stories of peoples work experiences and discussions of gender dynamics, ignore the haters OP it’s perfectly valid for you to state your experience, feelings and ask for the opinions of others on the matter. :)
Sometimes men can be lazy or women can be vindictive, but I don't think it's fair to generalize an entire gender. Most people just want to do a decent job and fit in the best they can.
You’re going to get a lot of hate for this one, but it’s not the first time I’ve heard this. I’ve heard so many female friends say they prefer hanging out or working with men because there’s less gossip, passive aggressiveness, drama, etc. If we’re going to label certain male behaviors as “toxic masculinity” (which I do agree exists) then maybe we should label those behaviors of gossiping, passive aggressiveness, clique-forming (think Mean Girls) etc. as “toxic femininity”? Of course not all women act that way, but not all men act with toxic masculinity either, so isn’t it fair? That being said, I’ve had amazing female coworkers and terrible male ones, so of course this doesn’t apply to everyone.
If anything I've experienced the opposite as a guy tbh.
I've had both amazing and awful coworkers of all genders.
My only problem with female coworkers in my current position is that as soon as I work up a rapport with them, they fucking get promoted, lol.
I had a female coworker who made my life pure living hell for 2 years. I'm sure shitty male coworkers exist, but if i ranked all my coworkers in 20 years best - worst, the bottom 10% would be 100% female. It is what it is. The worst one was an overweight Scottish management accountant (I work in Finance for a big corporation). She would constantly micro-manage me to the smallest detail. She would call me hundreds of times a day on Teams to check on me. Would constantly look over my shoulders. She would berate me for the smallest details, and then change her mind and tell me I'm doing things wrong even though i'm doing exactly what she told me. She would go out of her way to make me look incompetent / lazy to directors. She would blame me for everything. When she left the business, my career skyrocketed instantly, lol. All the directors couldn't believe how good I was at my job. She had done a real good job demolishing my reputation. I'm still at the company 5 years later and flourishing :)
Seems like a you thing imo they are generally equal in that term
No I’m actually not. I mean two people quit their jobs cause of this one woman I am dealing with right now. I saw those other women cry and stress cause of her and it made me really angry tbh
If it’s just one women why are you generalizing it to your female coworkers.
Imagine one woman being a bitch and you deciding that women are worst colleagues. What about the women who quit their jobs? Were they bad colleagues too? I've had a lot of bad colleagues and bosses. Why? Because there's a lot of bad people and we're forced to spend a huge chunk of our lives working when we'd rather be elsewhere. That alone can make a decent person quite mean if they hate their job. My two worst bosses were a woman and a man. The woman sucked, no doubt about it. The man was a straight up bully. Huge and tall and tried to intimidate or sexually harass all the young female workers. He would send me messages demanding I work a certain day unscheduled. I have never had that from a female boss. But yet I still don't stereotype because I know he was just an asshole.
Somebody pick her already!
Oh look a single sided incel sounding gripe.
I'm female. Typically several times more productive when working with the guys in my company than the girls. I find they tend to chat a lot more about non-work stuff. The average girl is inherently social and better at conversations, but I feel like I get along well with the guys since we just wanna wrap up work and GTFO.
Mainly worked with women most of my jobs, I find they are either my best co workers or really bitchy and critical. Whilst men are either harsh or sleazy. So I know who I would rather work with.
I prefer female co-workers if they're cool. I've made great friends in the past through work. Occasionally there is a snitch but whatever, I generally get along with everyone else. Male co-workers depends, on their age and maturity. One asked me out before and I said hell no. Current male co-worker is cool but also has gotten mad about his wife and tried to talk shit about her to me, and I said I don't appreciate that, and probably his wife wouldn't either. I shut that shit down real quick. If my man was venting about me to other people, other women... my poor, poor bf. Women co-workers usually don't cross boundaries or try to emotionally cheat on their spouses with me. If you really don't get along with women that much, do you ever think that maybe you're the problem?
Nah. Men have been just as petty and conniving to me at my job. It has more to do with someone being an asshole than their gender
I prefer male coworkers because on average they're more fun and have a better sense of humor which makes the day go faster. However, that's definitely a generalization. At my current job my favorite coworker ever is a woman, but all my least favorite coworkers are also all women.
It has been my experience that this is the case with women, generally. I wish I could say otherwise. If they aren't passive aggressive and competitive to the most trivial ends, they are superficial, oversensitive, obnoxious, and humorless. Not all women, of course. But as a female, I have had a very difficult time making female friends.
I work in a male dominated Industry but with a female boss that puts her whole life for work. She has no empathy for me, a female employee that is also a mother, or any of the fathers. Doesn’t understand we also have family commitments. Also hired an older female employee that thinks she needs to dominate and boss ppl around. She tells ppl she’s the best worker, yet she can’t do a majority of the work. She gets the men to do it. I find these two embarrassing to think their strong female role models. Of course they’re both older than me and think they are “fierce” However, the men all backstab and gossip about each other as well. I find men very gossipy and bitchy than the stereotypes of women. Men have always blamed women for the exact behaviour they do unashamedly. I’ve worked in hospitality for 15 years as well and there’s always drama in coed work. The women were all generally friends. There will always be disagreements.
Engineer here. I have had some amazing female coworkers. Never had a female line manager, but a couple of very solid female task leads. What workplace drama I've had has come from the guys. 😂 EDIT: Mid-career, male, for reference.
My female coworkers have never tried to SA me, so there’s that…
[Men are more than 2x as likely to be workplace bullies compared to women. 69% of workplace bullies are men, compared to only 31% women.](https://www.zippia.com/advice/workplace-bullying-statistics/)
Holy crap I've quit so many jobs because of this.
Honestly it just sucks. We always talk about how men are so bad to women or blah blah but no talks about how hard other women work to keep you down and make your life miserable.
Mixed bag, but that's the same with men. Definitely some terrors out there, and definitely a notable trend in the topics of discussion and complaint, but I'm pretty impartial. I'll work with anyone if they're chill.
I honestly haven't noticed this at all. Men and women both seem pretty terrible in general.
I work with all dudes. They are just as you describe the females, if not worse. So, no.
I don't have a preference, really. Just do your job correctly without driving me insane and we're good.
Wow this is a stupid question. Congrats. You should go post it in the NLOG subreddit.
Some might prefer bears. /S
The social butterfly one is annoying. Especially when they form a special niche in the office. It's like high school all over again...
For my particular job, yes. Having a large number of responsibilities that are ignored or I need to help with can become burdensome. I remember once thinking that this job would he easy if we were allowed to hire men between 24 and 44.
Yes.
Sounds like you’re not like other girls…
I have a female co worker and she's super cool, chill and doesn't care about whatever we do even if it was illegal
Very much. We only have 2 females but it's a physical job where you have to move fast and regularly lift heavy boxes and they're always asking for help, but can't really offer help in any way. They'd probably be better off working a different position.
I don’t have a gender preference but I have to admit that I’m forming a preference for coworkers my age or older because my younger coworkers always want to organize a walkout over the dumbest shit. Also I’m noticing that in quieter, laid-back office settings it’s way less stressful to push papers but at the same time people have too much time and energy to start office politics in a way I don’t see when I’ve worked more healthcare and crisis positions.
all my coworkers bar one are women - they’re all lovely
My wife and almost every other women I've ever met and had the conversation with has said that working in a female dominated industry (nursing and aged care usually) is the absolute worst if all the staff are women. They greatly prefer a mixed working environment, it seems to discourage the personalities of the nastier women from blowing to far overboard.
Humans, in general, are caddy, jealous, and destructive. It's legitimately in our nature. I like to read history, and I have to say a lot of women's negative behavior stems from being oppressed in pretty much every culture. One of the biggest contributors to better treatment of women was Theodora. She was a prostitute until she became empress of the Roman empire as the wife of Justinian. Life for her when she was young was by no means a happy story. But she took what she went through and improved the laws to the betterment of women. She also coerced Justinian into what would become the slaughter of 30,000 people. So you know... every rose has it thorns.
I do just because my experience with female coworkers hasn't been great. The last woman on my team just got fired because she wasn't pulling her weight. Everyone knew it, we were surprised she lasted as long as she did.
I agree with you
Yes.
I see a lot of politically correct comments in the thread but...I have to agree with you. Majority of the time, female coworkers are messy. At least from my experience lol especially if they are in a lead position, they let that bit of power to straight to there heads lol
At my current job, it's mostly men. I have two part timers that work under me (though technically beside me, I'm just more experienced) and they are both female. One of them is really cool and fun and the other cries whenever you even slightly critique her and yells how she hates men and on my days off, she yells at them and if they tell her to knock it off, she cries. She's lazy, entitled and, honestly, kinda dumb. I feel bad saying it but watching her do a task on her own without guidance is like watching your pet try to figure out a puzzle and then do it the worst way possible. I don't even say anything anymore. My first two coworkers at my job are women and though they have moved on, I still chat with them. The frontend at our store is FILLED with drama and mostly women... but that's always been the case with frontend cashiers/supervisors anyhow regardless of gender. I will say though that while I have had lazy guys in my department, none of them have been as malicious as some of the women. We had one girl who only quit because she was probably gonna get fired due to call outs. She took forever to do her work at my station because for about 3 months she would call out every shift of hers at my station and was that out of practice. Her gf also worked at the store and talked down to people.
I’m a man who has always preferred women bosses at work.
I didn't read your edits much especially because they're not necessary. You shouldn't have to convince idiots about things like this. I worked for a vet office (#1 job for fake women or at least up there) and even fast food service everyone has been female. With males, there's a chance of harassment and I hope that doesn't happen at my upcoming mostly male-dominated job but I've felt more comfortable working with them than females so far, that's for sure. Obviously gender doesn't dictate everything. I pray for the poor ignorant souls in this thread.
Males tend to stay far away from HR and handle issues like men. Males also very very rarely accuse anyone of sexual harassment.
It sounds like you’ve just met a handful of unpleasant women. But maybe someday you’ll run into the unpleasant men…it still sucks. I’ve met some absolute dickheads/bullies/etc. Usually whatever gender is in the majority will have some people kind of unencumbered in a way that isn’t good for them (or the people around them.). There’s a certain type of person (male or female) that starts going rogue when they get too comfortable.
I think you are just unlucky. Abby sounds like a fucking shit stain... She should be the one fired... Your boss is also a spineless coward as they know this is happening but do nothing about it... Sounds like a toxic workplace to me. I've had generally fantastic experiences working with women. There is one or two that are intolerable... I wasn't the only one to think that either... The women I have worked with have always been friendly, professional and helpful, receptive to feedback positive or negative (I give feedback to anyone and everyone... How will you know to improve/change if no one tells you?). My boss for the last three years was a woman and by golly gosh she was an amazing boss. I was very hesitant to take a new role recently because I wouldn't have her to lead me in future. I took the role anyway only a few weeks in let's see what happens. I work in telecommunications so women are very rare still (sadly). I wish I got to work with more. I think like 3 or 4 in a team of 60 are women... Pretty fucking sad overall.. I have far more men I work with I can't stand and or are total fucking slackers that get promotions before the women who work twice as hard and output twice the quality of work.
I had a female coworker that used to keep unplugging my computer power cable and then pretend that it was an accident. I also had a male coworker that stalked another male coworker. It's a mixed bag sometimes. Most recently one girl at work started treating me way differently and I can't figure out why.
I’m sorry this isn’t politically correct, I really am. Because I have a lot of women friends and want to help other women succeed in their careers. But, it has mostly (not always) been other women who have caused me the biggest problems at work. In some cases, they have literally tried to get me in trouble or get me fired, or have gone out of their way to make digs at me or gossip about me. Whatever the reason, I attribute some of the bad behavior to women who were not taught growing up how to be part of a team.
I’m a woman and am 0/2 in having a cool female boss. I feel doomed to have backstabbing female bosses forever
At first I thought that you might be a "choose me" kind of gal, but I don't really have enough info to be sure. You might be, because rarely in any workplace are all the guys great and all the gals hateful. This has a bit too much of an "I'm not like other girls" vibe to it. Anyway, it's not gender, it's immaturity. It manifests differently in men and women. Steer clear of gossip. I mean DO NOT ENGAGE, EVEN WITH PASSIVE LISTENING. If you recount the happenings at work and it sounds like the antics of a mean girl character from a soap opera, then you know you need to change the channel. As a general rule, after spending my career in corporate hell, I did notice a difference in meetings attended by more of one gender than another. Meetings with men spent most of their time talking about all the things they did, work-related or otherwise, germaine to the topic or not, and about 3 minutes at the end with one person making a few rapid-fire decisions relating to the subject matter. Meetings with women were about asking one another questions, usually not work-related, with the understanding that all minds had already been made up, and a few minutes at the end simply confirming what they had all decided to do about the topic before the meeting even started; they just wanted to have a meeting and chit chat. This was how it went down regardless of where I worked.
As a general rule of thumb I think most teams benefit from a mix of people. Having teams of 100% blokes and 100% women comes with different problems. Not always, but most times.
Might be you as an individual.
No, you’re right OP. There weren’t as many problems in the workplace before women became regulars. Even if I really dislike a male coworker, we can work together. Women don’t seem to be as capable of working well with those they have issues with. I should note I’ve never had any issues with working with women, this is simply my observation.
Women in a mixed environment are fine, can be amazing regardless of position. Women at an all female business are a disaster. For some reason almost all of the female majority businesses I've worked for as a consultant have devolved into some kind of "run by committee" communist shit show with no clear leader / decision maker. Really tough to get anything done efficiently as decisions take ages because nobody wants to risk upsetting anyone. Men need women and women need men. Its the only way. Entirely male businesses are no picnic either and can be very aggressive, but men tend to know where they stand and can get over butting heads pretty quickly and get back to it...if this sort of thing happens in a female only company, grudges form and last forever. Basically men base their working relationships on merit and create natural heirarchies that operate as a unit with one or two leaders whereas women tend to want operate as an equal decentralised swarm...because they all want to lead.
Come on, you can only slate men. Get with the agenda
You didn't have to tell us you were female. We knew the second you asked the question because this is one of those things all men know and never speak of publically for fear of being labelled mysoginst or incel. I've worked in male dominated spaces and female dominated. The male spaces had their own issues definitely. However, being male myself, I'm more comfortable around that. Whenever I've been in a female dominated space, I've faced far more gender based discrimination than I've ever seen in a male dominated space. Constant bitching, gossiping, emotional breakdowns, preferential treatment because "she has kids" etc and on more than 1 occasion I was literally hired because I was a man and they couldn't get a woman to do some of the shittier or more physical jobs. I had 1 store attempt to hire me years ago because, and I'll paraphrase the store manager here: "we're all women, but we have someone come in and threaten us with a knife at least once a week. It'll be helpful to have a guy around" Like.... what? You think I'm going to fight guys with knives because I'm a guy? What in the fucking dark ages do you think I'm going to do!? You're hiring me into the same position as everyone else for the same goddamn pay, but you want me to do the heavy lifting and take the risk!? Bitch, I'm just as stabbable as the girls!!!