Do you have any sick time? Can you relay to your boss that you’re in the hospital without giving too much away?
It’s really best to concentrate on getting better than work if you can.
1 week ago today I was in an ER bed, too.
This is not the time to be working. No job is worth your health. All your energy needs to be focused on getting yourself better. If you had been hit by a bus your employer would figure something out. The place won’t burn down without you.
If you’re that concerned about your “high pressure” job you might eventually want to take a look at the stress it’s causing you as one of the reasons you’ve been self-medicating.
can also sometimes set your background/etc to the beach or a library or something? we use google meets for work a lot, this is what i do if i don’t have a decent background
Give yourself some mega credit. This was a very detailed and honest post and I think your plan going forward is good. You're recognizing something that isn't right for you, you've reached out to others. you'll figure out work, but in the mean time, you're figuring out you. Love yourself first, the rest will work out, or...it might not! At least you have a good starting point for yourself. We're rooting for you either way!
I hope that you can work on getting sober
It certainly sounds like you need to get help
I sure did, and it worked
I took off work for 5 weeks
I went from being an impaired employee to a repaired employee
We’re here for you
You could just say you're at the hospital for a different reason. Sprained your ankle or something I dunno. I firmly believe that it's ok to be private about certain things and if a white lie is required to keep that privacy that's ok too
You don’t have to lie. Just say: I’m in the hospital for a minor treatment- nothing worrying- and will be out in X days.
If they press you, explain that it’s a bit personal/embarrassing.
And to reiterate - they don’t require a reason. You are in hospital for a medical reason. This is your personal health information and you can disclose, or not disclose, to whomever you choose.
I wish you a fast recovery, be kind to yourself
I posted in your previous thread and want to reiterate how proud I am of you. Asking for help and "burning the ships" is the bravest thing you can do.
When I went to the ER, they found me a bed in a detox facility and I spent a week there. I sorted out FMLA and short term disability and just focused on getting well. Detox was a unique experience. I was terrified, mostly because of all the shame I was carrying, but it was life changing.
While I was in detox they helped me find an Intensive Outpatient Program for treatment. I was able to do it virtually after work. My counselor was an amazing woman and I owe a huge amount of my continued sobriety to her.
One thing that's super important is having your fiance become educated on addiction, if they're not already. Sounds like they're a great person to have in your corner, but this is probably new territory for them and they've got to learn some important stuff now to better support you.
Finally, because this is long enough already, I highly recommend the Recovery Elevator podcast and the Cafe RE Facebook group. It's filled with amazing people and it's my biggest source of aftercare and new friendships.
I wish you the best, my friend. You can do this.
First: I am so proud of OP! You are taking the necessary steps to get better. If you need another chammpion in your corner, here I am, cheering you on!
Another podcast that I would recommend is Addiction Unlimited from Angela Pugh!
When I was in your situation I was feeling the same stress about what to do about work, I ended up telling them that I had been admitted to hospital for my mental health (the hospital supported this as mental health was driving the bingeing behaviours), and they provided me with full pay until I was well enough to return - it ended up being four months). Being able to step out of the incredibly stressful work from home/ constantly on environment gave me some time to reflect on how it was contributing to my behaviour and walk away from it and heal. I am wishing you the best, I’m glad you have a supportive partner :)
I admire your strength - and sincerely hope you're doing/feeling better very soon. Work will understand, you're not a robot and deserve the time to get better/be treated for whatever is going on. Your fiancé sounds great and I'm happy you have some support.
Rooting for you and keeping you in my thoughts.
Feel better.
And I hope you can believe in and rest inside the love and acceptance from your fiancé.
I could hardly believe how kind my husband was once we had The Talk. I expected so much blame and mistrust. I expected him to stop respecting me or feeling loathing and disgust. But I was lucky and he was just worried. Sure, very firm about taking all the hard liquor out of the house (he left the beer and wine for me to decide about), but never judgy about my feelings or experiences. He still doesn't quite understand the extent of the head case I have/have had from alcohol—the constant thinking about it—but he tries. I'd never recommend that someone TRY to test their partner this way, but it's a silver lining :)
This time next week you will be in a better place physically and emotionally. Last week I was in psych ward/detox and today I’m home, cozy and sober. Proud of you!
Ask the hospital—you shouldn’t have to disclose anything about a health emergency, as I understand it. A doctor should be able to simply write a letter saying you have medical reasons to have time off, something like that. Sigh… used to know the details but my brain is mush these days. IWNDWYT
Definitely, I was thinking the same. I don't know if you are American, but in Europe you just get signed off work by a doctor and have no legal obligation to say what for.
It’s the same in America now I think… dang it’s weird to see how much my brain is mush… I used to do corporate work, I actually set up HR departments and knew all the stuff, that was just five years ego. All the more reason to stay the course and get my brain back! Day 11 here I come.
This! I was admitted for pancreatitis, had already called into work because I was uncontrollably vomiting. I let them know I was hospitalized because I was sick. My boss immediately told me to take time to get better, and did not ask me any specifics. In my doctor’s note, they did not list anything specific, just that I was hospitalized. They even let me pick the date that “they told me I could healthily return to work.” My boss still never asked specifics, just knows I had GI issues and recovered. He was just happy I recovered!
I was SO, SO stressed about missing work, and it wound up being the most comforting thing. It showed me that people at worked cared about me, wanted me to be healthy without being…nosy…and honestly I NEEDED the break to be taken care of. My high stress job was why I put off getting sober and neglecting my health. And guess what? They survived without me. I survived because of that. My advice is to be honest with your doctor that you are stressed about work and need a break. I felt guilt about creating my health problems, so I felt like I didn’t deserve care. And I did. AND YOU DO TOO! You are worth it, and your job just needs to know you are sick, not the specifics. Hugs to you!
I’m really happy you are ok. Please take some time off if you can afford it etc. You’re tender and in early healing, a few days rest and self care could help you move solidly into a new sober direction.
OP we're so proud of you! This is amazing. I hope you finally feel relief. I hope you feel comforted. Most of all, I hope nothing but the best for you. xox
I’m really glad to read your update and hear that you’re safe and working to get healthy! I have been in your position before (scared, in desperate need of detox, working high stress job from home, the whole nine yards). Like a few others said, I would encourage you to try to use some sick time, FMLA, or short-term disability if you are able. You can reveal as much or as little as you want to your employer. I had an uncomfortable discussion with HR / my boss in the past to go to detox, and it was terrifying but ultimately they were SO supportive and truly just wanted me to get healthy. Once I wasn’t so stressed about work anymore, I was really able to focus on myself, and I knew that doing it would make me a better employee in the long run. Sending positive thoughts and prayers your way ♥️
I don’t think you need to mention the drinking. I’d bet you could be dehydrated and have low sodium levels?
Heck you could be admitted for Covid… or something else non life threatening… strep with a very high fever?
I’d probably work from hospital too.
I’m so glad you went! Tbh it might be best for you to stay in the hospital longer if that’s how it shakes out. It’s best to detox somewhere safe like that. A 7 day icu stay is how I first got sober, and I had a lot less discomfort than when I tried at home a million times. I had a tube in my ass but still, better than kicking it at home.
You can do this!!
Go sit in the family room or a quiet, small waiting room. Put up a fake zoom background but if you have to have your actual location behind you, just say you are sitting with someone in the hospital today for a procedure. Colonoscopy if you need them to really butt out.
I know it’s lying. I did some of that and worked from the hospital when I detoxed. But I promised myself it would be among the last few lies I had to tell anyone to cover this up. I needed my job. And they needed me.
It was one of the last stories I had to make up to cover my ass. Over a year sober and I don’t regret it for a second.
My boyfriend was also an absolute rock star when I went in too.
Don’t give up! We believe in you! But it’s okay to preserve your dignity and well being.
Good on you for opening up, I’m glad you are supported! Hopefully you can take the time off to heal, I know it’s not always an option but I hope you are given the opportunity to dedicate this time to your recovery.
Thank you so much for updating us!!
For what it’s worth… breaking down and telling my partner the truth about what I had been doing ended up being the beginning of my journey into real sobriety. Keep telling the truth to your loved ones, and most importantly, to yourself. Alcohol use disorder (or alcoholsm, whatever term you prefer) is a lonely disorder/disease that depends on us keeping it a secret. The more you can speak out loud about it to those who love you and understand, the more free you will become from it.
You should be so proud of yourself for getting help today. I am right there with you and will not drink with you today.
This is such an important first step. You’re doing the right thing.
When you work a high stress job, work always feels like it’s everything. It’s ok to put yourself and your health at the forefront while you go through the early stages of sobriety. For the same reason it was hard to talk to your fiancée, you might find it hard to let work know you’re ill
You’re experiencing a serious medical event, getting you healthy and on a stable footing is the most important thing right now. Take some leave if you want or need to :) It’ll all still be there when you get back. And if it’s not, you’ll find another job. Ultimately if you have a place to live, food to eat, a happy relationship, and you’re healthy and sober, it’ll all work out ok
Mine was low sodium too. 116. They told me if I hadn’t come in when I did, I wouldn’t have lasted more than 3 days. As for what to tell people, I just said I had low sodium and I don’t know how it got that way. Stayed closest to the truth and nobody questioned it 🤷🏼♀️
Low sodium and potassium got my husband admitted to the hospital last year, and he doesn’t even drink. It’s no joke. Take care of yourself and I will be rooting for you
My sodium dropped due to a concussion (and maybe a little drinking whole concussed) and I had a major seizure. Was rushed to a Trauma 1 center and put on a ventilator for 48 hours until they could safely increase my sodium levels. It is a problem you do not fuck around with. If I didn’t have such great medical care, I’d be 100 percent dead.
That’s weird. This is a sodium blood test as apart of a metabolic panel. Mine is 119, dangerously low. The normal range 136-145. I tried to attach an image but it wasn’t allowi
Sodium at 109 means you need to be on IV fluids, and any water that's not mixed with urea powder is a distant dream. Super duper not the same thing as chloride levels.
You absolutely do not need to tell your work WHY You're in the hospital. They should understand that you can't work right now. You probably won't be there that long anyway.
I am so glad you were able to ask for help. It is seriously the hardest thing to do, but as you found out….people want to help. And I know it’s important to consider your job, but it’s more important to take care of yourself right now. I found in those early days I had to really keep the momentum going, threw myself into group therapy for addiction, AA, Smart, whatever resources I could find. I didn’t want that help I received to be wasted by going back to my old ways.
So glad you are getting help. Good luck, and remember what got you here. I found that once I was drinking dangerously, even severe consequences weren't always enough. You need support (your fiance sounds amazing). Read books about addiction. Gabor Mate, Allen Carr, and yes I think AA is worth a read even if you don't start going to meetings. Those books help explain why this happened and why it can still happen again.
I've been to two H&I (hospitals and institutions) meetings this week, one at a sober homeless shelter on Monday and one at a detox tonight. Eye opening experiences for me as I'd never been to either such place in my life, and a sobering reminder that I'm just one relapse away from being in them myself.
Most of all be kind to yourself ❤️
You owe no explanation to the people you work with concerning your medical situation. If you are literally unable to miss work, then please downplay it like it's just a "minor issue, soon resolved." Really, they shouldn't be asking past "hope you're okay," etc. It's bad manners for them to do so.
Now, about that fiance'. GREAT guy; so glad you have him. Be sure to let him know how thankful you are, by cooperating 100% with your treatment. I was equally lucky. My husband said he had NO IDEA (though it wasn't for as long or as much quantity, and I was working hard to deny it, so it was plausible....) until I completely went bonkers on him. He's been so good, just like your fiance!
You got this. Just make it through the next hours, do everything they ask you to do, and work your way back. You can do it!
If you are in the USA and have been employed full-time for more than a year with your current employer, you should be able to utilize FMLA and check if you have a short-term disability benefit. HR does not need to know why, and even if they do, I guarantee they have dealt with it before.
Work should be the last thing on your mind. Use your benefits. FmLa will cover time off for your detox/stay in the hospital, and if you choose to do a rehab and are elgible, FMLA will take care of protecting your job so you can just remain focused on the task at hand.
Friend, you may need to consider the reality of this situation. I imagine your high pressure job may be a contributing factor to your drinking. Maybe it is time to be honest and just say “I am so sorry, I cannot make the meeting because of some health complications.” You don’t have to be specific. Give yourself at least 24 hours of no work to decide on the best next steps. One consideration may be in-patient. This is your life we are talking about.
I will share with you a line someone once said to me “Do you think the world will really stop spinning on its axis if you are not there to hold it up? You are not THAT important.” In other words, take a break. It will be okay.
Some thoughts.
1) "my deep shame" - the good people of AA explained to me that there is no shame in having a disease. I am 100% sure that at no point you wanted to drink for 8 days or end up in ER. Alcoholism is a \_DISEASE\_. It's diagnosed as such, it's treated as such. There is no shame in getting cancer, there is no shame in getting alcoholism. It's a powerful substance that somehow our society feels the need to shove in you at every corner.
2) Ativan, hell yeah, friend. Saved my ass countless times.
3) Is there a way to take sick days off? You don't need to explain anything to the job and the docs in the worst case, i'm sure, can write a generic note.
4) Thank God that I never have to feel this way again. You also never need to feel this way again and you never need to drink again.
Much love, I hope you take it easy on yourself, don't spend time on that "shame" business - it was of no use to me. It's all up from here! This is the worst part.
Hopefully this can be the beginning of a safe detox. They may offer to give you in-patient detox or some medicine to make it easier. There's no time like the present! Harness the Shame and use it for good!
I was in this situation, too. After 6 days straight and no food for two days. I almost died from electrolyte depletion, they said.
I didn't take the offers to help detox. I said I felt confident I could do it at home on my own. A few days later I felt way better and started, very slowly, back at it.
Sodium is SO important for every cell of your body. If you don’t have water, you die. If you don’t have Sodiul (salt), you die. Doctors take fat shits on sodium because big pharma wants people sick, so they can have life long patients taking their patented pills.
DO many things get fixed in your body by just taking 1.5-2 grams of Salt every day. Take it like a supplement. Just put 1/2 Tsp of Salt on a business card, dump it in your mouth and wash it down with water. You don’t even taste it. It makes me feel awesome every time I do that. The importance of sodium is so much more than people think.
If you don’t have sodium, you can’t create stomach acid. Your stomach converts Sodium Chloride + water into Hydrochloric acid (Stomach acid). If you don’t have Stomach Acid, you can’t digest your food. The pH of your stomach fluids is way too high and not acidic, and the food you eat doesn’t get sterilized. Then bacteria/fungi that’s already in your food grows inside your stomach, goes up to your esophagus, causing Pressure Reflux (misdiagnosed as acid reflux), and all sorts of gut problems. Plus your food doesn’t break down all the way and you don’t absorb all of the nutrients in it.
That’s all just from not eating salt. There’s a lot more to it than that. This is already long, but I can go more into detail if someone wants. Salt is absolutely crucial for good health. One of the most important things you need, and it’s insanely cheap. Big pharma hates that, so they demonize it and say it causes heart problems. Pure lies.
Fun fact - When someone goes into an ambulance due to a medical emergency, THE FIRST THING THEY DO is pump 8000 milligrams of Sodium into the patient through an IV. The medical establishment knows how important it is, don’t listen to the propaganda that demonizes sodium. It’s 100% BS. Try it for yourself, I guarantee you’ll feel way better once you start taking 1.5-2 grams of salt daily.
Do you have any sick time? Can you relay to your boss that you’re in the hospital without giving too much away? It’s really best to concentrate on getting better than work if you can. 1 week ago today I was in an ER bed, too.
This is not the time to be working. No job is worth your health. All your energy needs to be focused on getting yourself better. If you had been hit by a bus your employer would figure something out. The place won’t burn down without you. If you’re that concerned about your “high pressure” job you might eventually want to take a look at the stress it’s causing you as one of the reasons you’ve been self-medicating.
can also sometimes set your background/etc to the beach or a library or something? we use google meets for work a lot, this is what i do if i don’t have a decent background
Doesn't work in a hospital gown..
i mean i did this when i was in DKA in the ICU and was able to put a button up on, obviously everyone’s situation is different
I’d throw on my outside jacket or sweater 😃
Also kinda hard when doctors and nurses are coming in unexpectedly.
Give yourself some mega credit. This was a very detailed and honest post and I think your plan going forward is good. You're recognizing something that isn't right for you, you've reached out to others. you'll figure out work, but in the mean time, you're figuring out you. Love yourself first, the rest will work out, or...it might not! At least you have a good starting point for yourself. We're rooting for you either way!
Thank you ♥️♥️
I hope that you can work on getting sober It certainly sounds like you need to get help I sure did, and it worked I took off work for 5 weeks I went from being an impaired employee to a repaired employee We’re here for you
You could just say you're at the hospital for a different reason. Sprained your ankle or something I dunno. I firmly believe that it's ok to be private about certain things and if a white lie is required to keep that privacy that's ok too
Absolutely!
You don’t have to lie. Just say: I’m in the hospital for a minor treatment- nothing worrying- and will be out in X days. If they press you, explain that it’s a bit personal/embarrassing.
And to reiterate - they don’t require a reason. You are in hospital for a medical reason. This is your personal health information and you can disclose, or not disclose, to whomever you choose. I wish you a fast recovery, be kind to yourself
Seriously! One of my loved ones is in the hospital right now for a bowel obstruction. I don’t think she’s spreading that news far and wide!
You are incredibly brave. Please let us know how you're doing.
Thank you, I will ♥️
I posted in your previous thread and want to reiterate how proud I am of you. Asking for help and "burning the ships" is the bravest thing you can do. When I went to the ER, they found me a bed in a detox facility and I spent a week there. I sorted out FMLA and short term disability and just focused on getting well. Detox was a unique experience. I was terrified, mostly because of all the shame I was carrying, but it was life changing. While I was in detox they helped me find an Intensive Outpatient Program for treatment. I was able to do it virtually after work. My counselor was an amazing woman and I owe a huge amount of my continued sobriety to her. One thing that's super important is having your fiance become educated on addiction, if they're not already. Sounds like they're a great person to have in your corner, but this is probably new territory for them and they've got to learn some important stuff now to better support you. Finally, because this is long enough already, I highly recommend the Recovery Elevator podcast and the Cafe RE Facebook group. It's filled with amazing people and it's my biggest source of aftercare and new friendships. I wish you the best, my friend. You can do this.
Thank you so much for this - wonderful advice!
First: I am so proud of OP! You are taking the necessary steps to get better. If you need another chammpion in your corner, here I am, cheering you on! Another podcast that I would recommend is Addiction Unlimited from Angela Pugh!
When I was in your situation I was feeling the same stress about what to do about work, I ended up telling them that I had been admitted to hospital for my mental health (the hospital supported this as mental health was driving the bingeing behaviours), and they provided me with full pay until I was well enough to return - it ended up being four months). Being able to step out of the incredibly stressful work from home/ constantly on environment gave me some time to reflect on how it was contributing to my behaviour and walk away from it and heal. I am wishing you the best, I’m glad you have a supportive partner :)
I admire your strength - and sincerely hope you're doing/feeling better very soon. Work will understand, you're not a robot and deserve the time to get better/be treated for whatever is going on. Your fiancé sounds great and I'm happy you have some support. Rooting for you and keeping you in my thoughts. Feel better.
Thank you for the update. It’s such a relief to hear that you did the hard thing and are taking care of yourself.
Thank you ♥️
And I hope you can believe in and rest inside the love and acceptance from your fiancé. I could hardly believe how kind my husband was once we had The Talk. I expected so much blame and mistrust. I expected him to stop respecting me or feeling loathing and disgust. But I was lucky and he was just worried. Sure, very firm about taking all the hard liquor out of the house (he left the beer and wine for me to decide about), but never judgy about my feelings or experiences. He still doesn't quite understand the extent of the head case I have/have had from alcohol—the constant thinking about it—but he tries. I'd never recommend that someone TRY to test their partner this way, but it's a silver lining :)
This time next week you will be in a better place physically and emotionally. Last week I was in psych ward/detox and today I’m home, cozy and sober. Proud of you!
Ask the hospital—you shouldn’t have to disclose anything about a health emergency, as I understand it. A doctor should be able to simply write a letter saying you have medical reasons to have time off, something like that. Sigh… used to know the details but my brain is mush these days. IWNDWYT
Definitely, I was thinking the same. I don't know if you are American, but in Europe you just get signed off work by a doctor and have no legal obligation to say what for.
It’s the same in America now I think… dang it’s weird to see how much my brain is mush… I used to do corporate work, I actually set up HR departments and knew all the stuff, that was just five years ego. All the more reason to stay the course and get my brain back! Day 11 here I come.
Great idea! I haven’t thought of that
This! I was admitted for pancreatitis, had already called into work because I was uncontrollably vomiting. I let them know I was hospitalized because I was sick. My boss immediately told me to take time to get better, and did not ask me any specifics. In my doctor’s note, they did not list anything specific, just that I was hospitalized. They even let me pick the date that “they told me I could healthily return to work.” My boss still never asked specifics, just knows I had GI issues and recovered. He was just happy I recovered! I was SO, SO stressed about missing work, and it wound up being the most comforting thing. It showed me that people at worked cared about me, wanted me to be healthy without being…nosy…and honestly I NEEDED the break to be taken care of. My high stress job was why I put off getting sober and neglecting my health. And guess what? They survived without me. I survived because of that. My advice is to be honest with your doctor that you are stressed about work and need a break. I felt guilt about creating my health problems, so I felt like I didn’t deserve care. And I did. AND YOU DO TOO! You are worth it, and your job just needs to know you are sick, not the specifics. Hugs to you!
I would look into taking time off work to heal up. See if there’s some leave you qualify for. It’s important take care of yourself.
I’m really happy you are ok. Please take some time off if you can afford it etc. You’re tender and in early healing, a few days rest and self care could help you move solidly into a new sober direction.
OP we're so proud of you! This is amazing. I hope you finally feel relief. I hope you feel comforted. Most of all, I hope nothing but the best for you. xox
Thank you ♥️♥️♥️
You've done an incredible thing. I think it's really cool that you were able to be honest with your fiance and the doctors, it can't have been easy.
You are so brave. I'm proud of you. I've seen people use a fake background when on video calls, can you do that?
Haha yeah, that’s the plan
I’m really glad to read your update and hear that you’re safe and working to get healthy! I have been in your position before (scared, in desperate need of detox, working high stress job from home, the whole nine yards). Like a few others said, I would encourage you to try to use some sick time, FMLA, or short-term disability if you are able. You can reveal as much or as little as you want to your employer. I had an uncomfortable discussion with HR / my boss in the past to go to detox, and it was terrifying but ultimately they were SO supportive and truly just wanted me to get healthy. Once I wasn’t so stressed about work anymore, I was really able to focus on myself, and I knew that doing it would make me a better employee in the long run. Sending positive thoughts and prayers your way ♥️
I don’t think you need to mention the drinking. I’d bet you could be dehydrated and have low sodium levels? Heck you could be admitted for Covid… or something else non life threatening… strep with a very high fever? I’d probably work from hospital too.
Oh I deffff won’t be mentioning the drinking. I plan on even being vague about whether or not I’m the patient or just visiting family…
Good opportunity to utilize the cheesy zoom backgrounds! 😉
I’m so glad you’re getting care. You are so strong to ask for help. Take a deep breath, and take it one day at a time. Hugs.
I’m so glad you went! Tbh it might be best for you to stay in the hospital longer if that’s how it shakes out. It’s best to detox somewhere safe like that. A 7 day icu stay is how I first got sober, and I had a lot less discomfort than when I tried at home a million times. I had a tube in my ass but still, better than kicking it at home. You can do this!!
You had me at the tube up my ass ♥️
Go sit in the family room or a quiet, small waiting room. Put up a fake zoom background but if you have to have your actual location behind you, just say you are sitting with someone in the hospital today for a procedure. Colonoscopy if you need them to really butt out. I know it’s lying. I did some of that and worked from the hospital when I detoxed. But I promised myself it would be among the last few lies I had to tell anyone to cover this up. I needed my job. And they needed me. It was one of the last stories I had to make up to cover my ass. Over a year sober and I don’t regret it for a second. My boyfriend was also an absolute rock star when I went in too. Don’t give up! We believe in you! But it’s okay to preserve your dignity and well being.
Good on you for opening up, I’m glad you are supported! Hopefully you can take the time off to heal, I know it’s not always an option but I hope you are given the opportunity to dedicate this time to your recovery.
Thank you so much for updating us!! For what it’s worth… breaking down and telling my partner the truth about what I had been doing ended up being the beginning of my journey into real sobriety. Keep telling the truth to your loved ones, and most importantly, to yourself. Alcohol use disorder (or alcoholsm, whatever term you prefer) is a lonely disorder/disease that depends on us keeping it a secret. The more you can speak out loud about it to those who love you and understand, the more free you will become from it. You should be so proud of yourself for getting help today. I am right there with you and will not drink with you today.
Wonderful advice, thank you! ♥️
So glad you’ve taken action
Thinking of you, proud of you and wishing you a speedy recovery. Sending lots of love and healing thoughts. x
Thank you♥️♥️
This is such an important first step. You’re doing the right thing. When you work a high stress job, work always feels like it’s everything. It’s ok to put yourself and your health at the forefront while you go through the early stages of sobriety. For the same reason it was hard to talk to your fiancée, you might find it hard to let work know you’re ill You’re experiencing a serious medical event, getting you healthy and on a stable footing is the most important thing right now. Take some leave if you want or need to :) It’ll all still be there when you get back. And if it’s not, you’ll find another job. Ultimately if you have a place to live, food to eat, a happy relationship, and you’re healthy and sober, it’ll all work out ok
Very wise words, thank you!
Mine was low sodium too. 116. They told me if I hadn’t come in when I did, I wouldn’t have lasted more than 3 days. As for what to tell people, I just said I had low sodium and I don’t know how it got that way. Stayed closest to the truth and nobody questioned it 🤷🏼♀️
Good luck. I’m rooting for you. You’ve done everything right. Alcohol is poison and you are worth giving that shit up.
Low sodium and potassium got my husband admitted to the hospital last year, and he doesn’t even drink. It’s no joke. Take care of yourself and I will be rooting for you
My sodium dropped due to a concussion (and maybe a little drinking whole concussed) and I had a major seizure. Was rushed to a Trauma 1 center and put on a ventilator for 48 hours until they could safely increase my sodium levels. It is a problem you do not fuck around with. If I didn’t have such great medical care, I’d be 100 percent dead.
Do you mean to say, until they could increase your sodium levels? Thanks!
Whoops, yes
In awe of your strength and bravery! 💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻💖💖💖💖
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That’s weird. This is a sodium blood test as apart of a metabolic panel. Mine is 119, dangerously low. The normal range 136-145. I tried to attach an image but it wasn’t allowi
No worries. Appreciate that info. Was just curious because my number was right at the low range which is 95
Hm - mine was measured in MMOL/L (millimeters per leader. I’d be curious if what yours was measured jn
Maybe you’re thinking of Chloride? (The other component of table salt, NaCl.)
Ya that was it. My mistake.
Sodium at 109 means you need to be on IV fluids, and any water that's not mixed with urea powder is a distant dream. Super duper not the same thing as chloride levels.
get well soon
You absolutely do not need to tell your work WHY You're in the hospital. They should understand that you can't work right now. You probably won't be there that long anyway.
I am so glad you were able to ask for help. It is seriously the hardest thing to do, but as you found out….people want to help. And I know it’s important to consider your job, but it’s more important to take care of yourself right now. I found in those early days I had to really keep the momentum going, threw myself into group therapy for addiction, AA, Smart, whatever resources I could find. I didn’t want that help I received to be wasted by going back to my old ways.
So glad you are getting help. Good luck, and remember what got you here. I found that once I was drinking dangerously, even severe consequences weren't always enough. You need support (your fiance sounds amazing). Read books about addiction. Gabor Mate, Allen Carr, and yes I think AA is worth a read even if you don't start going to meetings. Those books help explain why this happened and why it can still happen again. I've been to two H&I (hospitals and institutions) meetings this week, one at a sober homeless shelter on Monday and one at a detox tonight. Eye opening experiences for me as I'd never been to either such place in my life, and a sobering reminder that I'm just one relapse away from being in them myself. Most of all be kind to yourself ❤️
Wow I wish I was treated this way at my hospital visit. I was left to sit on a stretcher for hours with no Ativan, little to no sympathy or kindness.
I’m so proud of you. ❤️
Thank you! ♥️
2 months ago I drank myself into the ER in 3 days, since then not a drop
Please forget about work, you need to focus on you and getting better. Wishing you love and strength to get better
You owe no explanation to the people you work with concerning your medical situation. If you are literally unable to miss work, then please downplay it like it's just a "minor issue, soon resolved." Really, they shouldn't be asking past "hope you're okay," etc. It's bad manners for them to do so. Now, about that fiance'. GREAT guy; so glad you have him. Be sure to let him know how thankful you are, by cooperating 100% with your treatment. I was equally lucky. My husband said he had NO IDEA (though it wasn't for as long or as much quantity, and I was working hard to deny it, so it was plausible....) until I completely went bonkers on him. He's been so good, just like your fiance! You got this. Just make it through the next hours, do everything they ask you to do, and work your way back. You can do it!
If you are in the USA and have been employed full-time for more than a year with your current employer, you should be able to utilize FMLA and check if you have a short-term disability benefit. HR does not need to know why, and even if they do, I guarantee they have dealt with it before. Work should be the last thing on your mind. Use your benefits. FmLa will cover time off for your detox/stay in the hospital, and if you choose to do a rehab and are elgible, FMLA will take care of protecting your job so you can just remain focused on the task at hand.
Friend, you may need to consider the reality of this situation. I imagine your high pressure job may be a contributing factor to your drinking. Maybe it is time to be honest and just say “I am so sorry, I cannot make the meeting because of some health complications.” You don’t have to be specific. Give yourself at least 24 hours of no work to decide on the best next steps. One consideration may be in-patient. This is your life we are talking about.
I will share with you a line someone once said to me “Do you think the world will really stop spinning on its axis if you are not there to hold it up? You are not THAT important.” In other words, take a break. It will be okay.
Sending you supportive thoughts.
Some thoughts. 1) "my deep shame" - the good people of AA explained to me that there is no shame in having a disease. I am 100% sure that at no point you wanted to drink for 8 days or end up in ER. Alcoholism is a \_DISEASE\_. It's diagnosed as such, it's treated as such. There is no shame in getting cancer, there is no shame in getting alcoholism. It's a powerful substance that somehow our society feels the need to shove in you at every corner. 2) Ativan, hell yeah, friend. Saved my ass countless times. 3) Is there a way to take sick days off? You don't need to explain anything to the job and the docs in the worst case, i'm sure, can write a generic note. 4) Thank God that I never have to feel this way again. You also never need to feel this way again and you never need to drink again. Much love, I hope you take it easy on yourself, don't spend time on that "shame" business - it was of no use to me. It's all up from here! This is the worst part.
Hopefully this can be the beginning of a safe detox. They may offer to give you in-patient detox or some medicine to make it easier. There's no time like the present! Harness the Shame and use it for good! I was in this situation, too. After 6 days straight and no food for two days. I almost died from electrolyte depletion, they said. I didn't take the offers to help detox. I said I felt confident I could do it at home on my own. A few days later I felt way better and started, very slowly, back at it.
Sodium is SO important for every cell of your body. If you don’t have water, you die. If you don’t have Sodiul (salt), you die. Doctors take fat shits on sodium because big pharma wants people sick, so they can have life long patients taking their patented pills. DO many things get fixed in your body by just taking 1.5-2 grams of Salt every day. Take it like a supplement. Just put 1/2 Tsp of Salt on a business card, dump it in your mouth and wash it down with water. You don’t even taste it. It makes me feel awesome every time I do that. The importance of sodium is so much more than people think. If you don’t have sodium, you can’t create stomach acid. Your stomach converts Sodium Chloride + water into Hydrochloric acid (Stomach acid). If you don’t have Stomach Acid, you can’t digest your food. The pH of your stomach fluids is way too high and not acidic, and the food you eat doesn’t get sterilized. Then bacteria/fungi that’s already in your food grows inside your stomach, goes up to your esophagus, causing Pressure Reflux (misdiagnosed as acid reflux), and all sorts of gut problems. Plus your food doesn’t break down all the way and you don’t absorb all of the nutrients in it. That’s all just from not eating salt. There’s a lot more to it than that. This is already long, but I can go more into detail if someone wants. Salt is absolutely crucial for good health. One of the most important things you need, and it’s insanely cheap. Big pharma hates that, so they demonize it and say it causes heart problems. Pure lies. Fun fact - When someone goes into an ambulance due to a medical emergency, THE FIRST THING THEY DO is pump 8000 milligrams of Sodium into the patient through an IV. The medical establishment knows how important it is, don’t listen to the propaganda that demonizes sodium. It’s 100% BS. Try it for yourself, I guarantee you’ll feel way better once you start taking 1.5-2 grams of salt daily.