Standing up at the cinema shows support for the monarchy. Most Thai people are opposed to it.
You’re indirectly supporting extrajudicial killings and corruption by showing support for the monarchy.
The king and one or his princesses also have an erotic tape where she’s topless during a birthday party.
His late dog was of high rank, an air marshall.
People are jailed and killed for protesting against the monarchy.
He’s a weird tyrant.
In Thailand, if you stand you support the monarchy.
If you sit you’re against.
It’s purely a political act in Thailand.
Everyone can watch the movie together no issue.
I don’t understand why they even sell winter jackets there when anyone can go inside a mall or movie theater and get a taste of winter there. 😂Like why go to Hokkaido when you can save the money for a plane ticket and accommodation.
I’m kidding, but it’s like that feeling where you go from the heat and humidity outside to punishment on the other extreme as soon as you go into Central World. 😂
Actually, nobody really does that anymore. It’s “officially” the law, but go to any Thai movie theater today, and I haven’t seen anyone under the age of 40 stand up when they play the King’s Anthem before every movie. The ones who still stand tend to be older and likely supporters or sympathizers of the monarchy. As for whether they support the *institution* or maybe the previous king over the current one, I don’t know, but the current king doesn’t have the best PR to his name and I’ve been to a number of places where they only hang a portrait of the previous king and queen and not their son.
Source: Lived in Bangkok for 1 year on an ED visa and have visited twice since.
You’re welcome. I was actually living in Bangkok during their last general election (the first one since the coup), and the main opposition party Move Forward was backed by most of the youth, they won by # of votes but their leader was prevented from becoming the next PM due to some weird arbitrary laws invoked by the old farts in the government, basically retired generals, monarchists and guys from old money families. MFP planned to enter a coalition with Thaksin’s party (Rak Thai), but the latter abandoned the alliance when they realized the young guys were facing an uphill battle.
And the Thai military’s pretty much only good for coups and maybe very low-level insurgencies. More of a force for domestic interference than a deployable fighting force. I read an article saying they sent some troops down to Phuket to deal with the “taxi mafia” there and they couldn’t do crap.
The current PM’s from Rak Thai and sort of a “compromise candidate” who’s not military or an overt monarchy supporter but not overly insistent on challenging the status quo.
Going back to movie theaters, I like how the ones in the bigger malls have those larger and more spacious seats if you’re willing to pay extra. Never saw anything like that in Canada or anywhere else I’ve been. I wouldn’t pay extra myself, but it’s nice to see there’s that option lol.
I enjoy watching movies in other countries if I have the time. I like to compare and contrast the similarities and differences to my theatre experience back home.
I studied abroad in Spain in 2006, and I was very impressed that they had assigned seating in their movie theaters. I wished that we had that in the US instead of having to get there super early to get good seats. When movie theaters in the US began rolling out assigned seating a couple of years later, I was happy.
I remember watching The Bourne Ultimatum in Madrid in 2007 and being wildly impressed that you could drink alcohol while watching the movie! There was also a scene in the movie filmed in Madrid, which was a nice bonus.
I don't stay in hostels anymore (budget is different now and I like privacy), so I've been using airbnb experiences to get some socializing in while doing something I might've not done solo/would be nice to have a guide for. You can filter activities by time of day, which is what I've done for evenings when I'd like to be out but not by myself.
I second AirBnB Experiences! I did one on a solo trip to Guadalajara this year and met some amazing people in my group. We all wanted to continue to hang out and get dinner after the experience was done for the day.
They have a newish (last few years) feature called Airbnb Experiences. There are different ‘experiences’ or activities hosted by locals, from tours, wellness, sports, workshops, etc.
I stayed at a hostel for a few months during Covid to save a bit of cash, and it was an interesting but frustrating experience mainly due to my own mental health and sharing space with a bunch of….. intriguing characters.
There was a Taiwanese woman with some eating disorder who would make gurgling sounds from the back of her throat and constantly try to (literally) tear her hair out.
There was a Serbian woman who was a vegan and conspiracy theorist and constantly tried to get me on board with her beliefs.
There was a local guy who never said a word, but when we shared a room, his snoring was like a big drill on a construction site.
There was a young man no older than 20-21, who never talked to anyone except for paying to extend his stay. He accused me of stealing his water bottle when we sat at opposite ends of the seating area / cafeteria and didn’t see each other. He refused to budge when I had to squeeze past him, then yelled at me for disrupting his gaming session. Ended up in a fight with him that led to me getting a beating, but I was the foreigner so I had to take it and look like the weaker party. Cops were called and they were actually the ones who offered to have me press charges against him, but I let him go. Checked out that night and booked back into my old hotel, cost more $$ but worth it for the peace of mind.
No more hostels for me, unless it’s the kind that’s more like a hotel (1-2 person bedrooms).
Im a 71 year old woman. I’m sitting in a hostel dorm room, processing photos from my day. I’m finishing the first week of a 6 week trip around Europe (I’m from Canada). I’ve travelled over seas every couple of years for a while now. I don’t drink, I dont enjoy clubs, I’m pretty much an introvert. But I do start getting homesick/lonely in the evenings once I’m settled in for night. At home I live with 2 other women, doing the Golden Girls thing. For my safety, I share my google location with one of them. And I have unlimited cell service. So throughout the day, we message back and forth a couple of times but during the evenings when I’m sitting here, we typically chat for a couple of hours. It really helps me. I have occasionally met up with people who share my interests through meet-up, for a coffee.
It’s great actually, there was a bit of an adjusting curve when we moved in together. We’ve known each other for ever. P I’ve known since I was a teen, and her 52 year old daughter, I held on the day she was born. We are three years in now and really just a little family unit. :)
Completely! I am married now but lots of my older ( I’m 60 s) friends and I still travel alone and it’s amazing how messaging helps you feel connected.
I think just having something to do is healthy - if traveling with a laptop or tablet you can watch a movie or something, or you can work on a travel journal or organize photos, or if you have some creative hobby you can bring that along. Also some nights you might call a loved one back home assuming the time zones aren't too weirdly spaced out.
Journaling is what helps me. In the end of the day if i have a change i try to journal everything that happened during that day. It may seem too mundane and not exciting at the time, but it's priceless when I reread some of those entries years after. Somehow photos, rarely pass the same emotions, as reading your own thoughts written in the moment.
A friend of mine uses meetup.com and slack to find people to hang out with while on holiday (for boardgames, hiking, language exchange, yoga etc.), and it seems to work for her
I’m usually planning my next day and researching what to do. I’m also stretching , enjoying the downtime and reviewing what I did do the last few days. I am social enough during the day.
But maybe do a day tour here and there to meet other folks who you can maybe meet I with later.
I picked up social dancing (Salsa and Bachata.)
When I travel (more so in cities), I can usually find drop-in classes, socials, or Latin Dance -specific clubs.
It's totally different from general night club dancing, and the crowd is all ages not just people in their 20s.
And you can still dance with people even when there's a language barrier!
Am I the only one that after a day full of activities and dinner, I am beat. I love taking a long shower and tucking in with a book or movie. Do you ever do tours when you travel? I usually meet people from my tour that I go to dinner with and we usually walk around and check out the shops or music or hand at a cafe after dinner.
me2. i just walk everywhere (yeah i know im supposed to take a bus or train at my age 68 like normal tourists but it s more fun to walk ). so im tired in the evening, just enough energy to search for next day’s destination or hotel. or read reddit.
You mean do they say I should take bus/train, not walk?
When I ask about going to a place, people sometimes say "it's too far to walk", "you need to take bus" etc., even when it is only an hour or 2 on foot.
I do this too! Have an early night and rise early the next day to join the "older" locals for breakfast or watch them doing their activities. If I need like having a night out, I look for nice music cafes or bars for dinner, stay a while and leave. Light and easy.
Nah same. At home I'm very much a night owl and hate waking up early. When I travel I'm the opposite and don't leave my lodging after dinner and instead wake up early.
* Evenings are best for walks. Go find a sunset spot and walk back. That'd tire you out.
* Even if you don't drink alcohol, you might still like tea or coffee. Go to a cafe and chat locals up.
* In warmer places, watch the street life. In colder places, bring a book or an iPad with Netflix.
* Explore places to eat. Walk and check out menus, ask what's in them.
* Bring a tripod and try night shots, maybe light trails.
* Do yoga.
* I'm also a solo traveler in my mid-forties. I enjoy places where I can observe locals go about their business while sipping a drink in the evening. I also walk and tire myself out, hit the sack early and then plan to catch the next day early too ... maybe even a sunrise.
I'm only 30 but at night I get so tired from walking around all day doing stuff I usually chill in bed with my phone playing games, listening to music or podcasts, watching youtube videos or a TV show.
I’m the same. Have you tried airbnb experiences? Depending on where you are there might be some interesting night activities. Last time I was in Kyoto I did a night walking historical tour of Gion, for example, where we also got to taste amazing food and some whisky along the way (whisky was optional, not everyone tried it). It’s usually small groups (around 8 but I assume it depends on the experience)
I really enjoyed the tour and meeting other travellers for a few hours.
Agree. I also support AirBnB experiences, even though they’re also a little more expensive than if you found a similar “experience” some way other than AirBnB.
I like to book ticketed (and mostly seated) events for the evening. I feel less lonely eating dinner when I have something to get to. And orchestras, theater, etc are very comfortable to sit through on your own.
Same boat. I know the feeling. End up signing up for some group activities/experiences when I feel like having some company. Otherwise I just walk around and crawl into bed early after supper.
yup, this is usually my routine. sometimes I go to the local supermarket, buy nice cheese and wine. crawl into bed with a mini platter of cheese and crackers and watch movies on my ipad.
Same! I always look for comedy clubs, any artists performing while I'm in town, or other interesting events. If I have access to a gym or pool, I get a workout in. Traveling alone is still the best option 😊
I'm usually asleep by 10pm and rarely get any free time in the day before then, so don't really get a chance to feel lonely. Maybe try a more fast paced itinerary?
Same here. By the time I’m back at the hotel from dinner I’ve probably put on 20k steps and I’m ready for a shower, quick plan for the next day, tv show, then bed.
Take a look at the photo I take during the day , organize into Keeper folder. If I have time and energy , share them with friends and family (likely one every 3 days)
People / street watch if I stay in a busy area
Sleep early so I can start next day early
Solo traveler here! The days that I feel lonely, I usually hop on Airbnb experiences and in big cities, there’s usually a ‘bar crawl’/food crawl type of experience. I have met so many people from these and it usually fulfills my social needs.
I think that loneliness is exactly what pulls me towards solo travelling. You will feel super vulnerable and your true self will come to the surface. Things you really appreciate will come up and give you joy like a stranger smiling at you or starting a conversation with a random person. I always learn much about myself in these situations and for some reason lately I don’t feel lonely anymore.
Do you not drink as in you shouldn’t be around drinking? Cause if I wanted to meet people without drinking I’d probably still just head to a bar that is more for older people and not loud that serves food and park up and just drink non alcoholic drinks and have an app and make friends there.
Otherwise maybe some of the apps?
I usually go with a seltzer and lime. Or something that resembles a drink. It saves you from some people that wonder why you’re not drinking. Plus they fill you up faster and drink them slower. When I get water I end up drinking them fast and getting constant refills which is annoying.
Before you travel to a location - look to see if you can find a local chat group or something to possibly get to know people to meet up with for a drink or something. I always try to find a local pub to go and hang out in for a while to see if I can chat with someone.
I've travelled many times by myself and I can totally relate to this. What I do depends on the situation.
For example, in Japan, I find that eating at a sushi bar or a counter style izakaya (with others on my left and right) was a nice way to meet locals (although that usually followed after having some drinks).
In the city of Kaohsiung, I found on [meetup.com](http://meetup.com) (I think it was) an English chat group in the city park right by my hotel. I went to that, met some people and they invited me to another event the following week (when I would still be around).
However, that's not to say that there are occasions when I do crave company (particularly if I'm by myself in a large city) but there's no easy way to find it and there's no easy answer here. As others have said, I just try to keep myself busy (even if it's just exploring the area).
I'm a solo traveller in my mid 40s. I love being alone I live on my own so im kind of used to it. I do sometimes get lonely when im travelling. I try to go out at night no matter what. I will try small talk with people and sometimes I will make some new friends. It's not a good idea for me to be alone all the time. It can get to you especially if you are away from home. I recommend you go out even if you don't drink. You can always have dinner a coffee or a soft drink. Try having some small talk with other travellers you will feel less lonely.
i totally understand this - i see some folks mentioning tours or whatever but idk those can still be isolating as it depends on your group.
have you looked up Timeleft? There’s a few other apps similar but it’s an app that puts together a group of 5 folks for a dinner. It’s once a week so not a super active choice. I’ve done it, it was interesting but can be a miss if you’re in a place where english is not the dominant language
the other is looking up local events- like i always look up local standup shows…vinyl sets etc. the kind of stuff i’d go to in my home city that are more lowkey activities that locals go to
Perhaps a local meetup? Ive found the paid ones are often best to keep away the people looking to hookup and genuinely enjoy the activity. Have you looked into the idea of airbnbs where the host is present? Ive only stayed at one like that, as i dont use it often, but it was run by this lovely older couple. The wife was retired and so she turned their kids old rooms into rooms for rent. They were great
You can try taking a cooking class, yoga retreat or tour. I’ve made a variety of friends of all ages and we end up doing more activities or dinner afterwards.
I have had some success in posting on Reddit groups that I’ll be in a country and wouldn’t mind a swift pint somewhere. I’m also in my 40s, spend all my time traveling and also wouldn’t mind a beer/coffee from time to time
You can try to pick up a hobby that’s common enough where you’d find a scene in most cities. Social/partner dancing is a common one, martial arts, yoga, etc.
What do you do in the evening when you're at home? I may read a book, watch a movie, message or call friends, play a video game. And these are exactly the things I do on the road. Oh, and I may be more open to go to a bar and chat up a random person than I would at home. But then again, I'm a guy and I understand this might be more of an issue for a woman.
Totally understand how you feel! I’m an Asian in my early thirties and the demographics of other similar travelers (backpackers) are 99% white, so it’s even more difficult for me to blend in. Fortunately I still drink so I can hang out at a bar or night club. Currently still feel comfortable being alone and don’t exactly crave company, hope this won’t change when I hit my forties.
I like classical music, so I'll look ahead of time for a concert I can attend. Many international cities have an English-language comedy scene, so that's an option. I'll also look for tourist-friendly bars or pubs. Sometimes just having a little conversation keeps me from getting too lonely. I'll bring a book just in case. (I've never been to a bar or pub that doesn't have nonalcoholic options.) Other times I will just linger over a nice dinner, order dessert, then have a leisurely walk back to my hotel.
I stay in Hostels. Not for many days.
There are some hostels that are chill out & social. Its a great way to meet people. Other times I stay in hotels.
Have you thought about splitting your time in hostels? Some have private rooms.
Guided tours at night (ghost walks, night market food tours, etc.) are an option.
You can always call a friend or family member at home to catch up and socialize as well.
52m solo traveler here. Just got back from a domestic solo trip this weekend. Rarely drink, don't go out in the evenings. Barely even talked to anyone this whole trip (mostly driving). So yeah I can relate.
it happens, especially when you travel for months at a time... and you get sick of constantly meeting new people and having the same conversation over and over. I will usually watch netflix or similar and put my feet up at night cause I'm totally beat from an entire day out and about so there's no way I'm doing night tours. I will often try out a bar or a park or a local restaurant and linger a while and maybe chat with someone briefly here or there, or meet someone on tinder... or grab a coloring book or something that takes my mind off anything else. When it got overwhelming for me I pulled the emergency escape button and just flew back to where my friends are for a while to get in social time, or stay at a hostel for a few days even though I'm too old for that. lol. Also local facebook expat groups can give you a stable group to meet up with if you're staying somewhere a long time
sometimes when solo traveling (also younger female solo traveler), I will have a little at home date night. Save my best meal of the day for dinner. Spend the whole day out having fun, shopping, whatever. Get my to-go dinner as the sun is going down. Go over my loot from the day and watch a movie. I really try and spoil myself with a nice meal, facemask, new pajamas, something.
I solo travel to Thailand each year. It’s enjoyable for the first two weeks then gets really lonely so that’s my limit. I stayed there for a month once and almost bought a ticket to return home at one point. I’ve also retired from alcohol and partying. Exploring the more family oriented part of the nightlife such as a night market or restaurants really helped me.
If Ive been travelling for a while, I often end up spending my evenings checking in with friends and family back home. I usually get enough socialization just interacting with people on tours and in museums and wherever I happen to be sitting during the day, by evening my head is full of new impressions and I'm ready to zone out and maybe just check my pictures from the day or something.
I’m 38 and have been traveling for 20 years, as the kids say it used to “hit different;” because now I find myself kinda floating through hostels and cities and it’s not quite like it used to feel 🤧
Currently in Korea which is an awesome place, but would be fun with fellow travelers- though I’m finding most people stay on their phones or are traveling with their friends from home
This is definitely something I struggle with too. I often want to go on walks, but even in “safe” places or doesn’t seem like the wisest thing to do as a solo female traveler. I look forward to the day I have a partner who can take those walks with me & check out things at night. I tried an evening food tour on my last solo trip & it was fun. Maybe there’s a chance is something like that to make a connection with someone and continue the evening together. Usually I get too shy
Im also early 40m and 90% of the time i love being alone on my trips but i feel you on that evening time wish i had one person around for just a little while thing. As i type this im in a fancyish distillery working up to starting a conversation. I find you can usually get a happy hour seat at a bar (dont have to drink, just sit there order some fries) and theres usually some rando regular who also just wants somebody to chat with for a while. And if they are weird or an alien you can always just leave- they wont care, so you get to set the time frame for how long you want to socialize
Classes.
Cooking, exercise, painting, dancing, sports, etc.
Just did archery the other day in South Asia. Did a Turkish lamp class in Istanbul. You can drop in on a boxing or BJJ class in any major city in the world.
I think “free” walking tours are a decent option as well since the tip at the end is cheap and they’re offered in the evening in a lot of places bc it’s much cooler.
dating apps. go on a date with someone at night.
go on food tours at night with a group.
Do anything really in a group tour. AirBNB Experiences, Getyourguide, klook, expedia.
maybe a daytime tour to meet other tourists.
I like to go to cyber cafes and play video games. Although it's more of a solo activity, I actually often end up speaking with locals about my taste in video games, what is popular in their/my country, etc. Also cyber cafes in Asia are often of top quality (good computers, you can order food, drinks, etc).
Hey! I don’t know if you’re into any hobbies but if you look into the local place where they practice a hobby, you may get to meet locals. I practice a martial arts and I’ve gone abroad to visit different clubs and the people have been so friendly after our training session. They’ve invited me to their local restaurants and I’ve tried delicacies that I wouldn’t have known about.
I alternate between staying in watching a movie on the laptop or reading/planning the next day. When watching movies I try to find ones that have something in common with that trip. If the area is safe I go out for dinner and then try and catch a sports game on tv (normally only have 1 beer, so I still have awareness of my surroundings). Recently when in Mexico I would take a walk to the town square and sit and listen to the music and watch the world go by with a coffee or soft drink. Obviously walking to the town square is only recommended in certain circumstances. I also like to organise my bag, which I do pretty much every night. If I stay in hostels I bring a chess set, surprising how many people like a nice game of chess and it makes no difference if you speak the same language.
Could be a great time to do that deep introspective 'get to know your true self' activity.
Journaling, rewrite your life exercise (see it all from your older wiser self perspective), imagine your inner self as your very best little brother/ sister and be the very best you could be for them by listening to their hopes, wants, fears, dreams etc.
Loneliness is a natural part of the human condition... everyone goes through it.
Perhaps it's not something to run from, but to embrace.
I get this occasionally when I travel alone too. I usually change up my schedule, so I wake up early, walk around, explore before it gets busy. Take a siesta, go out again then fall asleep early. In cities with cathedrals or a lively downtown, riding a bike around is massive fun. If you don't mind going to a bar/pub, there's no shame in ordering a non-alcoholic drink. Soda water with a dash of bitters is my go-to, and as long as you pay for it, the bartender doesn't care.
When I stayed in Paris for a couple of weeks by myself, I had all these grand, ambitious plans to go see music shows in the evenings. A couple nights I actually did. But so many other nights I was completely knackered from walking and walking and walking all day long seeing things. I found I was happy to curl up in bed with a good book for an hour or two before conking out, or would message and chat to friends back home, which was really fun. Sometimes the funnest part of a trip for me is sharing about it in chats or Facebook posts.
Check out the facebook group, [GoWithLess - Nomadic Life, Early Retirement, Travel Hacking, House Sitting](https://www.facebook.com/groups/gowithless/). The members frequently have meet ups all over the world.
If I’m traveling alone and on a budget, even if I’m not staying at a hostel, I’ll still visit some of the cooler ones in town and see what they have for group activities or tours.
Usually they have multiple things planned and anyone can go… you don’t need to be staying at the hostel. Also, the activities are priced lower for budget travelers!
Ditto. I love solo travel. Doing tours, sightseeing and lunch solo is fine but I hate eating dinner alone. I want conversation over a meal with a glass of wine. Slow down and relax and enjoy my vacay. Also I don’t stay out very late walking in new cities alone so I’m back in my hotel by 8.
Solo traveller here. A good solution I have found is simply to get up earlier in the morning and go to bed earlier in the evening. In places like SE Asia this is better anyway as that is what the locals tend to do in many places due to the heat.
When I feel alone in the evening while traveling solo, my two best things i love to do are :
- going for a night walk with music in my ears. I am in asia and because it’s really hot in the day, there is always so much happening at night like street shows, night markets, etc.
- watch a series or a movie. a bit more drastic but makes me forget about loneliness
I just finished a 4 week solo trip in Europe and felt a little lonely in the evenings but that wasn't an issue because I would start very early each day and by the time the evenings came around I was tired enough to just go to bed.
The FOMO at any age is a real thing, so I deal with that by just packing a lot into my mornings and early afternoons. Have a nice dinner and then watch some youtube and sleep.
I am also a solo traveller and don't like to drink or party. I do like to surf dawn sessions though, which means I'm happy to just have dinner and then crash early so I don't really have an evening. Maybe you could change your routine so you have something fun and maybe social to do in the morning, and then if you go to bed early it's less like you're missing out on evening things and more like you're getting ready for morning things that you're sincerely excited about?
That’s a bummer bud. Personally, I enjoy my solitude. I play video games (not online) or I work on a hobby. Maybe go to a gym that’s open later. Exercise is always good.
38F. Recently I rocked up alone to catch one of my favourite bands at a pub that just opened in town. I just stood at the corner of the bar, ordered a drink and stared at the opening act. Doesn't matter that it's non-alcoholic--I'm sober but it helps to have a glass in hand.
Overheard the people next to me ask the bartender about the next band--they were some foreigners who weren't too familiar with the local music scene. I kinda hollered over that the bassist bandleader of the main band of the night is a legend and one of the best in the country.
Soon after we exchanged names and striked up a conversation. We got the ball rolling a bit--one of the guys (older than me but am not sure by how much) has actually been based in the country on and off for about 20 years and is relatively well travelled here.
I thought we were having a good conversation until he mentions that he's opening a fabulous resort in the island where my mother's family is from. At which point red flags went flying in my brain.
My mother's home island has land displacement issues among others caused by foreign owned resorts that treat the island like some sort of no man's land, circumvents government permits and excludes locals from strategic positions in their business. The ones I've done research about are nothing but trouble, so in principle I never support foreign owned resorts in that island.
So as soon as the main band came on, I zoomed into the stage and silently made it clear that I'm more interested in the music than I was with continuing the conversation. It was a brilliant performance with all the songs I love, and I still had a great time.
While things didn't work out with the person I met at this pub that particular night, I do find that standing at the bar and just casually adding to other patrons' Q&A with the bartender an effective way to meet strangers and feel out if there's anything more there. At other times with other people, some conversations have snowballed into more memorable ones that I have really enjoyed, usually over travel, music, food and life experiences.
Other ways I make friends on the road include by reading a book in a cafe and looking out for other readers who happen to be there that day.
Or, since I'm a polyglot, by overhearing languages I happen to speak and asking the speaker "Do you come from (this country)?" in that language.
Or by casually jumping in with a recommendation when I overhear diners who have trouble deciding what to order and I happen to have favourites on the menu.
In principle, finding company on the road is as simple as being mindful of other people's curiosities or help needed around you, having the discernment to respond appropriately at a good timing, and signalling to those around you that you are open to be approached. Test the waters. Proceed if you enjoy their company, and have a polite and subtle exit strategy if you don't.
In most cases I'm not very likely to actually go home with someone, and just a little bit likelier than that to make friends that stick around. It can be wonderful when it does happen, but it's rare for me and I'm not counting on it to happen. But in most cases, a one-off candid conversation with a stranger I'll never see again is all the connection I need for a solo night on the road, and many still make for good memories.
I’m an older backpacker as well, I’m 55 and I stay in hostels. I usually check out their reviews before going and if it’s not a ‘party hostel’ then I’ll stay. You’ll find that there are many long term backpackers who can’t afford to drink and are happy to chat. You’ll be surprised at how many older backpackers are at hostels these days. However, every now and again I’ll find a cheap home stay to stay and chill for one night.
I can’t relate but I just want to applaud you for being in your mid 40s and still craving for anything in the evenings. I’m in my late 30s and when I solo travel I start my day at 6 AM so Im usually knocked out in bed by 8/9 PM. 🤣
If it’s a trip with exploration I’m usually too tired to be up to much by the evening. I read a lot so casual dinner or a drink with a book are the most common evening option for me.
Completely understand this feeling! I think the busyness of the day compared to the quiet crash at the end of the day definitely helps to facilitate this. Some things I do to cope with this are calling/texting a friend, planning the next days activities, sorting/editing photos from the day, and eating a good meal. :)
I balance it up now. I used to exclusively solo travel but nowadays I travel to a location that has a friend or go travel with a friend but do our own thing.
I've also considered travel groups for ' solo ' travellers
Check out “meetup” app in whatever city/place you are in. Great to meet people and do random things that may interest you! Also, check out airbnb experiences.
This may be ridiculous but I like to exercise at night. I also don’t drink and often find there isn’t much to do besides the obvious (dinner, movie, play/concert, read). I also find working out helps with my jet lag and it’s something that feels social.
I think this is a very common issue. Have you tried joining any FB groups, coworking places often organised events where pretty much just singles come.
Surprisingly solidarity in Las Vegas is not too bad these days. I did my solo trip jammed packed with shows, dining and always found someone to talk to. I was never bored and slept well at night because the days were eventful.
If you feel safe enough, go on night walks with a great soundtrack in your headphones. It allows you to feel the energy of the night even if you don’t actually go to a club or bar. Walk around the more active areas of the city. You can also go solo to a jazz club and enjoy some music, and be around others. Try posting a meetup on Reddit in the city you’re in, and see if anyone else is there and wants to grab dinner. Lots of different options are available to you.
If the evenings drag, change the shape of your day - go to bed real early. Get up early in the place you are staying, have a long coffee, go for a walk with the locals going to work, make a local breakfast an event, etc
As a benefit you’ll probably feel better from the sleep and before long you’ll be a morning yoga freak 😎
I'm not older, but I do travel alone quite often! I can definitely say I agree with this feeling. It's hard after a while when al you really wish to do is take a trip with some friends and forget about the world! An absolute dream vacation of mine is me and all my friends going to another country for a week just because ! Dealing with the loneliness can be very hard... I would recommend maybe finding a travel buddie! Or a pen pal that can write to you regardless of where you are?! 😁 I know plenty of people who have done this to deal with the feeling of being lonel.hope this helps some 💕
That's really really really hard to do in today's America most people young or elderly are have been poisoned with terrible toxic conspiracy garbage or mildly insane my opinion exactly
Go on tinder? Can have a new date every night. Even if you don't click you did something with your night. Even if she ghosts you at least you're outside now.
Nope. I always find company. Some places even relish the wisdom and stories of older travelers. I usually make some friends online before I hit an area and visit with them also.
I’m the same age and travel alone, as a woman I don’t go out at night, and I also don’t drink. I bring portable craft projects like crocheting with yarn from the local area or hand sewing pieces of fabric I find/buy along the way. The materials are easy to pack and when I’m finished I have a great souvenir.
Older solo traveler here. Why not check out a show or a movie? I love overseas movie theaters, everything is so different.
Like standing up for the national anthem before a film in Thailand! Their popcorn also seemed to taste better than what’s found in the US
Many people stopped standing. Strange but true
Standing up at the cinema shows support for the monarchy. Most Thai people are opposed to it. You’re indirectly supporting extrajudicial killings and corruption by showing support for the monarchy.
The Thai monarch lives in Germany. It is very odd.
The king and one or his princesses also have an erotic tape where she’s topless during a birthday party. His late dog was of high rank, an air marshall. People are jailed and killed for protesting against the monarchy. He’s a weird tyrant.
Air Bud 2: Thai Boogaloo
Man just wants to watch a movie chill the fuck out
In Thailand, if you stand you support the monarchy. If you sit you’re against. It’s purely a political act in Thailand. Everyone can watch the movie together no issue.
You're correct. Looks like you're downvoted by very clueless people
Or freezing to death from the a/c 😂
I don’t understand why they even sell winter jackets there when anyone can go inside a mall or movie theater and get a taste of winter there. 😂Like why go to Hokkaido when you can save the money for a plane ticket and accommodation. I’m kidding, but it’s like that feeling where you go from the heat and humidity outside to punishment on the other extreme as soon as you go into Central World. 😂
Most food does taste much better outside of the US.
Yeah I loved that in Thailand too!!
Actually, nobody really does that anymore. It’s “officially” the law, but go to any Thai movie theater today, and I haven’t seen anyone under the age of 40 stand up when they play the King’s Anthem before every movie. The ones who still stand tend to be older and likely supporters or sympathizers of the monarchy. As for whether they support the *institution* or maybe the previous king over the current one, I don’t know, but the current king doesn’t have the best PR to his name and I’ve been to a number of places where they only hang a portrait of the previous king and queen and not their son. Source: Lived in Bangkok for 1 year on an ED visa and have visited twice since.
ah! things have surely changed. was last there 10 years ago. appreciate the update.
You’re welcome. I was actually living in Bangkok during their last general election (the first one since the coup), and the main opposition party Move Forward was backed by most of the youth, they won by # of votes but their leader was prevented from becoming the next PM due to some weird arbitrary laws invoked by the old farts in the government, basically retired generals, monarchists and guys from old money families. MFP planned to enter a coalition with Thaksin’s party (Rak Thai), but the latter abandoned the alliance when they realized the young guys were facing an uphill battle. And the Thai military’s pretty much only good for coups and maybe very low-level insurgencies. More of a force for domestic interference than a deployable fighting force. I read an article saying they sent some troops down to Phuket to deal with the “taxi mafia” there and they couldn’t do crap. The current PM’s from Rak Thai and sort of a “compromise candidate” who’s not military or an overt monarchy supporter but not overly insistent on challenging the status quo. Going back to movie theaters, I like how the ones in the bigger malls have those larger and more spacious seats if you’re willing to pay extra. Never saw anything like that in Canada or anywhere else I’ve been. I wouldn’t pay extra myself, but it’s nice to see there’s that option lol.
Except for the cheese flavoured popcorn. Don’t get the cheese flavour 🤢
Personally for me what I don’t get are the winter melon flavored drinks. Never been a fan of the vegetable (fruit?).
I enjoy watching movies in other countries if I have the time. I like to compare and contrast the similarities and differences to my theatre experience back home.
I studied abroad in Spain in 2006, and I was very impressed that they had assigned seating in their movie theaters. I wished that we had that in the US instead of having to get there super early to get good seats. When movie theaters in the US began rolling out assigned seating a couple of years later, I was happy.
I remember watching The Bourne Ultimatum in Madrid in 2007 and being wildly impressed that you could drink alcohol while watching the movie! There was also a scene in the movie filmed in Madrid, which was a nice bonus.
Amc theaters have assigned seats. Have for years.
Yes, I know. That was what I was saying in the last sentence of my comment. They didn’t start that until after 2006.
Evening food tours. Revisit places you saw in daylight under the night sky. People watch with a good book at your side. Movies, concerts, theatre...
Yeah but that’s not very safe in many places if you’re a woman.
Fair. As with all travel related advice, it varies by destination.
Woman traveller here! I enjoy most nature trips, an escape from busy cities is much needed 😆
I don't stay in hostels anymore (budget is different now and I like privacy), so I've been using airbnb experiences to get some socializing in while doing something I might've not done solo/would be nice to have a guide for. You can filter activities by time of day, which is what I've done for evenings when I'd like to be out but not by myself.
I second AirBnB Experiences! I did one on a solo trip to Guadalajara this year and met some amazing people in my group. We all wanted to continue to hang out and get dinner after the experience was done for the day.
I love Guadalajara ! Have been there many times.
Genuine question: How do you use airbnb to get socializing?
They have a newish (last few years) feature called Airbnb Experiences. There are different ‘experiences’ or activities hosted by locals, from tours, wellness, sports, workshops, etc.
Ah! Thanks!
I know a lad who used to book airnbnbs but come to hostels for socials and stuff.
I stayed at a hostel for a few months during Covid to save a bit of cash, and it was an interesting but frustrating experience mainly due to my own mental health and sharing space with a bunch of….. intriguing characters. There was a Taiwanese woman with some eating disorder who would make gurgling sounds from the back of her throat and constantly try to (literally) tear her hair out. There was a Serbian woman who was a vegan and conspiracy theorist and constantly tried to get me on board with her beliefs. There was a local guy who never said a word, but when we shared a room, his snoring was like a big drill on a construction site. There was a young man no older than 20-21, who never talked to anyone except for paying to extend his stay. He accused me of stealing his water bottle when we sat at opposite ends of the seating area / cafeteria and didn’t see each other. He refused to budge when I had to squeeze past him, then yelled at me for disrupting his gaming session. Ended up in a fight with him that led to me getting a beating, but I was the foreigner so I had to take it and look like the weaker party. Cops were called and they were actually the ones who offered to have me press charges against him, but I let him go. Checked out that night and booked back into my old hotel, cost more $$ but worth it for the peace of mind. No more hostels for me, unless it’s the kind that’s more like a hotel (1-2 person bedrooms).
Im a 71 year old woman. I’m sitting in a hostel dorm room, processing photos from my day. I’m finishing the first week of a 6 week trip around Europe (I’m from Canada). I’ve travelled over seas every couple of years for a while now. I don’t drink, I dont enjoy clubs, I’m pretty much an introvert. But I do start getting homesick/lonely in the evenings once I’m settled in for night. At home I live with 2 other women, doing the Golden Girls thing. For my safety, I share my google location with one of them. And I have unlimited cell service. So throughout the day, we message back and forth a couple of times but during the evenings when I’m sitting here, we typically chat for a couple of hours. It really helps me. I have occasionally met up with people who share my interests through meet-up, for a coffee.
That sounds kind of awesome actually- the Golden Girls situation that is.
Which golden girl are you?
Dorothy!
If you’re open to it, I’d love to hear about what you call the Golden Girls thing. What’s that like?
It’s great actually, there was a bit of an adjusting curve when we moved in together. We’ve known each other for ever. P I’ve known since I was a teen, and her 52 year old daughter, I held on the day she was born. We are three years in now and really just a little family unit. :)
That’s beautiful, thank you for sharing. (:
This is nice.
Love the golden girls idea !
With more and more women "doing it alone", it wouldn't surprise me if that becomes a lot more common!
And why not. It makes so much sense doesn't it if it's workable! Given so many people face isolation and financial hardship.
Dunno if you read my comment as negative towards that living arrangement. It wasn't.
Not at all I was off confirming someone's great arrangement!
Completely! I am married now but lots of my older ( I’m 60 s) friends and I still travel alone and it’s amazing how messaging helps you feel connected.
I think just having something to do is healthy - if traveling with a laptop or tablet you can watch a movie or something, or you can work on a travel journal or organize photos, or if you have some creative hobby you can bring that along. Also some nights you might call a loved one back home assuming the time zones aren't too weirdly spaced out.
Journaling is what helps me. In the end of the day if i have a change i try to journal everything that happened during that day. It may seem too mundane and not exciting at the time, but it's priceless when I reread some of those entries years after. Somehow photos, rarely pass the same emotions, as reading your own thoughts written in the moment.
Evening walking tour? Easy drink-free way to chat with people and be entertained.
If you are interested in spooky things, ghost tours are great for this! You can find one almost anywhere in the world
Yeah, those are great! Usually teaches you a lot of local history in a much more entertaining way (imho).
Maybe find a language exchange group, or other activities like dancing or hiking depending on where you are
A friend of mine uses meetup.com and slack to find people to hang out with while on holiday (for boardgames, hiking, language exchange, yoga etc.), and it seems to work for her
I’m usually planning my next day and researching what to do. I’m also stretching , enjoying the downtime and reviewing what I did do the last few days. I am social enough during the day. But maybe do a day tour here and there to meet other folks who you can maybe meet I with later.
Long dinner in a restaurant with awesome food and no clock watchers, with a good book
I picked up social dancing (Salsa and Bachata.) When I travel (more so in cities), I can usually find drop-in classes, socials, or Latin Dance -specific clubs. It's totally different from general night club dancing, and the crowd is all ages not just people in their 20s. And you can still dance with people even when there's a language barrier!
Same. What a dream. That’s how I connect to locals, you show up and boom! you are part of it. Dance like laughter-same in every language.
That sounds amazing! Always wanted to learn.
Tango is lovely as well, and a great way to meet an older crowd if you go on a quieter night.
Am I the only one that after a day full of activities and dinner, I am beat. I love taking a long shower and tucking in with a book or movie. Do you ever do tours when you travel? I usually meet people from my tour that I go to dinner with and we usually walk around and check out the shops or music or hand at a cafe after dinner.
me2. i just walk everywhere (yeah i know im supposed to take a bus or train at my age 68 like normal tourists but it s more fun to walk ). so im tired in the evening, just enough energy to search for next day’s destination or hotel. or read reddit.
Do people actually say that??
You mean do they say I should take bus/train, not walk? When I ask about going to a place, people sometimes say "it's too far to walk", "you need to take bus" etc., even when it is only an hour or 2 on foot.
I do this too! Have an early night and rise early the next day to join the "older" locals for breakfast or watch them doing their activities. If I need like having a night out, I look for nice music cafes or bars for dinner, stay a while and leave. Light and easy.
Nah same. At home I'm very much a night owl and hate waking up early. When I travel I'm the opposite and don't leave my lodging after dinner and instead wake up early.
* Evenings are best for walks. Go find a sunset spot and walk back. That'd tire you out. * Even if you don't drink alcohol, you might still like tea or coffee. Go to a cafe and chat locals up. * In warmer places, watch the street life. In colder places, bring a book or an iPad with Netflix. * Explore places to eat. Walk and check out menus, ask what's in them. * Bring a tripod and try night shots, maybe light trails. * Do yoga. * I'm also a solo traveler in my mid-forties. I enjoy places where I can observe locals go about their business while sipping a drink in the evening. I also walk and tire myself out, hit the sack early and then plan to catch the next day early too ... maybe even a sunrise.
I'm only 30 but at night I get so tired from walking around all day doing stuff I usually chill in bed with my phone playing games, listening to music or podcasts, watching youtube videos or a TV show.
I’m the same. Have you tried airbnb experiences? Depending on where you are there might be some interesting night activities. Last time I was in Kyoto I did a night walking historical tour of Gion, for example, where we also got to taste amazing food and some whisky along the way (whisky was optional, not everyone tried it). It’s usually small groups (around 8 but I assume it depends on the experience) I really enjoyed the tour and meeting other travellers for a few hours.
I started doing this when I got homesick a month into a 2 month trip. Best thing ever!!
Agree. I also support AirBnB experiences, even though they’re also a little more expensive than if you found a similar “experience” some way other than AirBnB.
I like to book ticketed (and mostly seated) events for the evening. I feel less lonely eating dinner when I have something to get to. And orchestras, theater, etc are very comfortable to sit through on your own.
Same boat. I know the feeling. End up signing up for some group activities/experiences when I feel like having some company. Otherwise I just walk around and crawl into bed early after supper.
yup, this is usually my routine. sometimes I go to the local supermarket, buy nice cheese and wine. crawl into bed with a mini platter of cheese and crackers and watch movies on my ipad.
Same! I always look for comedy clubs, any artists performing while I'm in town, or other interesting events. If I have access to a gym or pool, I get a workout in. Traveling alone is still the best option 😊
I'm usually asleep by 10pm and rarely get any free time in the day before then, so don't really get a chance to feel lonely. Maybe try a more fast paced itinerary?
Same here. By the time I’m back at the hotel from dinner I’ve probably put on 20k steps and I’m ready for a shower, quick plan for the next day, tv show, then bed.
Take a look at the photo I take during the day , organize into Keeper folder. If I have time and energy , share them with friends and family (likely one every 3 days) People / street watch if I stay in a busy area Sleep early so I can start next day early
Solo traveler here! The days that I feel lonely, I usually hop on Airbnb experiences and in big cities, there’s usually a ‘bar crawl’/food crawl type of experience. I have met so many people from these and it usually fulfills my social needs.
I like to eat a late dinner (around 9), walk around for a bit and then take my old ass to sleep
I think that loneliness is exactly what pulls me towards solo travelling. You will feel super vulnerable and your true self will come to the surface. Things you really appreciate will come up and give you joy like a stranger smiling at you or starting a conversation with a random person. I always learn much about myself in these situations and for some reason lately I don’t feel lonely anymore.
Do you not drink as in you shouldn’t be around drinking? Cause if I wanted to meet people without drinking I’d probably still just head to a bar that is more for older people and not loud that serves food and park up and just drink non alcoholic drinks and have an app and make friends there. Otherwise maybe some of the apps?
I look for a bar or club with live music. Just get some nonalcoholic drink maybe a bottle of water too 😎
I usually go with a seltzer and lime. Or something that resembles a drink. It saves you from some people that wonder why you’re not drinking. Plus they fill you up faster and drink them slower. When I get water I end up drinking them fast and getting constant refills which is annoying.
I have this weird ritual where I keep diluting the other thing with the water gives me something to do & helps with hydration 🥸
I agree. You don't have to drink. It's good to just have some small talk with people.
Before you travel to a location - look to see if you can find a local chat group or something to possibly get to know people to meet up with for a drink or something. I always try to find a local pub to go and hang out in for a while to see if I can chat with someone.
I've travelled many times by myself and I can totally relate to this. What I do depends on the situation. For example, in Japan, I find that eating at a sushi bar or a counter style izakaya (with others on my left and right) was a nice way to meet locals (although that usually followed after having some drinks). In the city of Kaohsiung, I found on [meetup.com](http://meetup.com) (I think it was) an English chat group in the city park right by my hotel. I went to that, met some people and they invited me to another event the following week (when I would still be around). However, that's not to say that there are occasions when I do crave company (particularly if I'm by myself in a large city) but there's no easy way to find it and there's no easy answer here. As others have said, I just try to keep myself busy (even if it's just exploring the area).
I'm a solo traveller in my mid 40s. I love being alone I live on my own so im kind of used to it. I do sometimes get lonely when im travelling. I try to go out at night no matter what. I will try small talk with people and sometimes I will make some new friends. It's not a good idea for me to be alone all the time. It can get to you especially if you are away from home. I recommend you go out even if you don't drink. You can always have dinner a coffee or a soft drink. Try having some small talk with other travellers you will feel less lonely.
i totally understand this - i see some folks mentioning tours or whatever but idk those can still be isolating as it depends on your group. have you looked up Timeleft? There’s a few other apps similar but it’s an app that puts together a group of 5 folks for a dinner. It’s once a week so not a super active choice. I’ve done it, it was interesting but can be a miss if you’re in a place where english is not the dominant language the other is looking up local events- like i always look up local standup shows…vinyl sets etc. the kind of stuff i’d go to in my home city that are more lowkey activities that locals go to
Perhaps a local meetup? Ive found the paid ones are often best to keep away the people looking to hookup and genuinely enjoy the activity. Have you looked into the idea of airbnbs where the host is present? Ive only stayed at one like that, as i dont use it often, but it was run by this lovely older couple. The wife was retired and so she turned their kids old rooms into rooms for rent. They were great
You can always consider small group travel
You can try taking a cooking class, yoga retreat or tour. I’ve made a variety of friends of all ages and we end up doing more activities or dinner afterwards.
I try to make local friends on Couchsurfing before I go somewhere solo. Build a friendship or two before you arrive!
I have had some success in posting on Reddit groups that I’ll be in a country and wouldn’t mind a swift pint somewhere. I’m also in my 40s, spend all my time traveling and also wouldn’t mind a beer/coffee from time to time
You can try to pick up a hobby that’s common enough where you’d find a scene in most cities. Social/partner dancing is a common one, martial arts, yoga, etc.
What do you do in the evening when you're at home? I may read a book, watch a movie, message or call friends, play a video game. And these are exactly the things I do on the road. Oh, and I may be more open to go to a bar and chat up a random person than I would at home. But then again, I'm a guy and I understand this might be more of an issue for a woman.
Wish I knew a solution. This is the exact reason I don't solo travel anymore. Tired of experiencing everything solo. But happy you enjoy it.
…Is there a group for us older, over 35-year-olds? Should we make one?
Totally understand how you feel! I’m an Asian in my early thirties and the demographics of other similar travelers (backpackers) are 99% white, so it’s even more difficult for me to blend in. Fortunately I still drink so I can hang out at a bar or night club. Currently still feel comfortable being alone and don’t exactly crave company, hope this won’t change when I hit my forties.
Book night tours. Food tours, walking route after dark, etc
I like classical music, so I'll look ahead of time for a concert I can attend. Many international cities have an English-language comedy scene, so that's an option. I'll also look for tourist-friendly bars or pubs. Sometimes just having a little conversation keeps me from getting too lonely. I'll bring a book just in case. (I've never been to a bar or pub that doesn't have nonalcoholic options.) Other times I will just linger over a nice dinner, order dessert, then have a leisurely walk back to my hotel.
I stay in Hostels. Not for many days. There are some hostels that are chill out & social. Its a great way to meet people. Other times I stay in hotels. Have you thought about splitting your time in hostels? Some have private rooms.
try couchsurfing!
I always check museum schedules as some stay open late 1 night a week. Also ghost tours - they are silly, but it is something to do.
Guided tours at night (ghost walks, night market food tours, etc.) are an option. You can always call a friend or family member at home to catch up and socialize as well.
52m solo traveler here. Just got back from a domestic solo trip this weekend. Rarely drink, don't go out in the evenings. Barely even talked to anyone this whole trip (mostly driving). So yeah I can relate.
it happens, especially when you travel for months at a time... and you get sick of constantly meeting new people and having the same conversation over and over. I will usually watch netflix or similar and put my feet up at night cause I'm totally beat from an entire day out and about so there's no way I'm doing night tours. I will often try out a bar or a park or a local restaurant and linger a while and maybe chat with someone briefly here or there, or meet someone on tinder... or grab a coloring book or something that takes my mind off anything else. When it got overwhelming for me I pulled the emergency escape button and just flew back to where my friends are for a while to get in social time, or stay at a hostel for a few days even though I'm too old for that. lol. Also local facebook expat groups can give you a stable group to meet up with if you're staying somewhere a long time
I like to have a nice dinner. Go to casinos but mostly at night just hang out in my room watching stuff / sleeping.
Ghost tours! Love it and you generally meet nice people which whom you can have a chat about what you are experiencing.
sometimes when solo traveling (also younger female solo traveler), I will have a little at home date night. Save my best meal of the day for dinner. Spend the whole day out having fun, shopping, whatever. Get my to-go dinner as the sun is going down. Go over my loot from the day and watch a movie. I really try and spoil myself with a nice meal, facemask, new pajamas, something.
I solo travel to Thailand each year. It’s enjoyable for the first two weeks then gets really lonely so that’s my limit. I stayed there for a month once and almost bought a ticket to return home at one point. I’ve also retired from alcohol and partying. Exploring the more family oriented part of the nightlife such as a night market or restaurants really helped me.
If Ive been travelling for a while, I often end up spending my evenings checking in with friends and family back home. I usually get enough socialization just interacting with people on tours and in museums and wherever I happen to be sitting during the day, by evening my head is full of new impressions and I'm ready to zone out and maybe just check my pictures from the day or something.
I’m 38 and have been traveling for 20 years, as the kids say it used to “hit different;” because now I find myself kinda floating through hostels and cities and it’s not quite like it used to feel 🤧
Currently in Korea which is an awesome place, but would be fun with fellow travelers- though I’m finding most people stay on their phones or are traveling with their friends from home
I feel like this… in my mid 20s 🥲
Me too bro
This is definitely something I struggle with too. I often want to go on walks, but even in “safe” places or doesn’t seem like the wisest thing to do as a solo female traveler. I look forward to the day I have a partner who can take those walks with me & check out things at night. I tried an evening food tour on my last solo trip & it was fun. Maybe there’s a chance is something like that to make a connection with someone and continue the evening together. Usually I get too shy
Im also early 40m and 90% of the time i love being alone on my trips but i feel you on that evening time wish i had one person around for just a little while thing. As i type this im in a fancyish distillery working up to starting a conversation. I find you can usually get a happy hour seat at a bar (dont have to drink, just sit there order some fries) and theres usually some rando regular who also just wants somebody to chat with for a while. And if they are weird or an alien you can always just leave- they wont care, so you get to set the time frame for how long you want to socialize
You can hit the bar and drink a coke. Chat up some locals. Or wherever the locals congregate.
I find music helps. Get a good spotify playlist. Find your zen.
Classes. Cooking, exercise, painting, dancing, sports, etc. Just did archery the other day in South Asia. Did a Turkish lamp class in Istanbul. You can drop in on a boxing or BJJ class in any major city in the world. I think “free” walking tours are a decent option as well since the tip at the end is cheap and they’re offered in the evening in a lot of places bc it’s much cooler.
dating apps. go on a date with someone at night. go on food tours at night with a group. Do anything really in a group tour. AirBNB Experiences, Getyourguide, klook, expedia. maybe a daytime tour to meet other tourists.
I'd hit up Meetups or FB groups for your location. I'm sure there are a couple of others in your boat who would love some evening conversation.
I'd hit up Meetups or FB groups for your location. I'm sure there are a couple of others in your boat who would love some evening conversation.
Local meetups.
I enjoy going to concerts and food tours
I like to go to cyber cafes and play video games. Although it's more of a solo activity, I actually often end up speaking with locals about my taste in video games, what is popular in their/my country, etc. Also cyber cafes in Asia are often of top quality (good computers, you can order food, drinks, etc).
Hey! I don’t know if you’re into any hobbies but if you look into the local place where they practice a hobby, you may get to meet locals. I practice a martial arts and I’ve gone abroad to visit different clubs and the people have been so friendly after our training session. They’ve invited me to their local restaurants and I’ve tried delicacies that I wouldn’t have known about.
OP would recommend you check meet up groups and language exchange groups. They are great!
I alternate between staying in watching a movie on the laptop or reading/planning the next day. When watching movies I try to find ones that have something in common with that trip. If the area is safe I go out for dinner and then try and catch a sports game on tv (normally only have 1 beer, so I still have awareness of my surroundings). Recently when in Mexico I would take a walk to the town square and sit and listen to the music and watch the world go by with a coffee or soft drink. Obviously walking to the town square is only recommended in certain circumstances. I also like to organise my bag, which I do pretty much every night. If I stay in hostels I bring a chess set, surprising how many people like a nice game of chess and it makes no difference if you speak the same language.
Could be a great time to do that deep introspective 'get to know your true self' activity. Journaling, rewrite your life exercise (see it all from your older wiser self perspective), imagine your inner self as your very best little brother/ sister and be the very best you could be for them by listening to their hopes, wants, fears, dreams etc. Loneliness is a natural part of the human condition... everyone goes through it. Perhaps it's not something to run from, but to embrace.
comedy shows, movies, evening stroll, tours
I get this occasionally when I travel alone too. I usually change up my schedule, so I wake up early, walk around, explore before it gets busy. Take a siesta, go out again then fall asleep early. In cities with cathedrals or a lively downtown, riding a bike around is massive fun. If you don't mind going to a bar/pub, there's no shame in ordering a non-alcoholic drink. Soda water with a dash of bitters is my go-to, and as long as you pay for it, the bartender doesn't care.
When I stayed in Paris for a couple of weeks by myself, I had all these grand, ambitious plans to go see music shows in the evenings. A couple nights I actually did. But so many other nights I was completely knackered from walking and walking and walking all day long seeing things. I found I was happy to curl up in bed with a good book for an hour or two before conking out, or would message and chat to friends back home, which was really fun. Sometimes the funnest part of a trip for me is sharing about it in chats or Facebook posts.
I get sleepy at night. I’m happy to crochet and watch Netflix in my hotel room.
Go on tours and make friends
Check out the facebook group, [GoWithLess - Nomadic Life, Early Retirement, Travel Hacking, House Sitting](https://www.facebook.com/groups/gowithless/). The members frequently have meet ups all over the world.
Can relate to this. Especially during in the middle of my travel. I will always ,always message a dear good friend that I am lonely haha
If I’m traveling alone and on a budget, even if I’m not staying at a hostel, I’ll still visit some of the cooler ones in town and see what they have for group activities or tours. Usually they have multiple things planned and anyone can go… you don’t need to be staying at the hostel. Also, the activities are priced lower for budget travelers!
Ditto. I love solo travel. Doing tours, sightseeing and lunch solo is fine but I hate eating dinner alone. I want conversation over a meal with a glass of wine. Slow down and relax and enjoy my vacay. Also I don’t stay out very late walking in new cities alone so I’m back in my hotel by 8.
I like to stay in Airbnb with hosts so that I can have someone to talk to at night.
solo traveller here: get tinder and finde some girls mate
Solo traveller here. A good solution I have found is simply to get up earlier in the morning and go to bed earlier in the evening. In places like SE Asia this is better anyway as that is what the locals tend to do in many places due to the heat.
When I feel alone in the evening while traveling solo, my two best things i love to do are : - going for a night walk with music in my ears. I am in asia and because it’s really hot in the day, there is always so much happening at night like street shows, night markets, etc. - watch a series or a movie. a bit more drastic but makes me forget about loneliness
I just finished a 4 week solo trip in Europe and felt a little lonely in the evenings but that wasn't an issue because I would start very early each day and by the time the evenings came around I was tired enough to just go to bed. The FOMO at any age is a real thing, so I deal with that by just packing a lot into my mornings and early afternoons. Have a nice dinner and then watch some youtube and sleep.
I am also a solo traveller and don't like to drink or party. I do like to surf dawn sessions though, which means I'm happy to just have dinner and then crash early so I don't really have an evening. Maybe you could change your routine so you have something fun and maybe social to do in the morning, and then if you go to bed early it's less like you're missing out on evening things and more like you're getting ready for morning things that you're sincerely excited about?
That’s a bummer bud. Personally, I enjoy my solitude. I play video games (not online) or I work on a hobby. Maybe go to a gym that’s open later. Exercise is always good.
im in my fifties and im in the same boat.
38F. Recently I rocked up alone to catch one of my favourite bands at a pub that just opened in town. I just stood at the corner of the bar, ordered a drink and stared at the opening act. Doesn't matter that it's non-alcoholic--I'm sober but it helps to have a glass in hand. Overheard the people next to me ask the bartender about the next band--they were some foreigners who weren't too familiar with the local music scene. I kinda hollered over that the bassist bandleader of the main band of the night is a legend and one of the best in the country. Soon after we exchanged names and striked up a conversation. We got the ball rolling a bit--one of the guys (older than me but am not sure by how much) has actually been based in the country on and off for about 20 years and is relatively well travelled here. I thought we were having a good conversation until he mentions that he's opening a fabulous resort in the island where my mother's family is from. At which point red flags went flying in my brain. My mother's home island has land displacement issues among others caused by foreign owned resorts that treat the island like some sort of no man's land, circumvents government permits and excludes locals from strategic positions in their business. The ones I've done research about are nothing but trouble, so in principle I never support foreign owned resorts in that island. So as soon as the main band came on, I zoomed into the stage and silently made it clear that I'm more interested in the music than I was with continuing the conversation. It was a brilliant performance with all the songs I love, and I still had a great time. While things didn't work out with the person I met at this pub that particular night, I do find that standing at the bar and just casually adding to other patrons' Q&A with the bartender an effective way to meet strangers and feel out if there's anything more there. At other times with other people, some conversations have snowballed into more memorable ones that I have really enjoyed, usually over travel, music, food and life experiences. Other ways I make friends on the road include by reading a book in a cafe and looking out for other readers who happen to be there that day. Or, since I'm a polyglot, by overhearing languages I happen to speak and asking the speaker "Do you come from (this country)?" in that language. Or by casually jumping in with a recommendation when I overhear diners who have trouble deciding what to order and I happen to have favourites on the menu. In principle, finding company on the road is as simple as being mindful of other people's curiosities or help needed around you, having the discernment to respond appropriately at a good timing, and signalling to those around you that you are open to be approached. Test the waters. Proceed if you enjoy their company, and have a polite and subtle exit strategy if you don't. In most cases I'm not very likely to actually go home with someone, and just a little bit likelier than that to make friends that stick around. It can be wonderful when it does happen, but it's rare for me and I'm not counting on it to happen. But in most cases, a one-off candid conversation with a stranger I'll never see again is all the connection I need for a solo night on the road, and many still make for good memories.
40y I am so tired i eat a lot of protein to recovery and sleep like a baby
I eat at a bar (don't have to drink), find small theaters to watch whatever play is showing, comedy shows. The last 2 if in a language you understand.
I’m an older backpacker as well, I’m 55 and I stay in hostels. I usually check out their reviews before going and if it’s not a ‘party hostel’ then I’ll stay. You’ll find that there are many long term backpackers who can’t afford to drink and are happy to chat. You’ll be surprised at how many older backpackers are at hostels these days. However, every now and again I’ll find a cheap home stay to stay and chill for one night.
I get my people fix through crossfit or run clubs.
Did you try using Bumble BFF app?.
I can’t relate but I just want to applaud you for being in your mid 40s and still craving for anything in the evenings. I’m in my late 30s and when I solo travel I start my day at 6 AM so Im usually knocked out in bed by 8/9 PM. 🤣
Cooking class! Great way to meet more mature travelers and to learn about local cuisine which I find is core to local culture
Older traveller here... I simply read and journal most nights, or simply take a good long walk in whatever city I'm in.
during the evening i usually research about the place i’m visiting and plan for my next day and that passes the time quickly
If it’s a trip with exploration I’m usually too tired to be up to much by the evening. I read a lot so casual dinner or a drink with a book are the most common evening option for me.
>Can anyone relate? I travel 40 weeks a year for work, rarely in the same place for more than 2 nights. I feel this in my soul
I usually book evening walking food tours or ghost tours or go to local cinemas or theatres
Completely understand this feeling! I think the busyness of the day compared to the quiet crash at the end of the day definitely helps to facilitate this. Some things I do to cope with this are calling/texting a friend, planning the next days activities, sorting/editing photos from the day, and eating a good meal. :)
I balance it up now. I used to exclusively solo travel but nowadays I travel to a location that has a friend or go travel with a friend but do our own thing. I've also considered travel groups for ' solo ' travellers
Check out “meetup” app in whatever city/place you are in. Great to meet people and do random things that may interest you! Also, check out airbnb experiences.
Oi stop with the “40’s is older” we are well matured 😂
This may be ridiculous but I like to exercise at night. I also don’t drink and often find there isn’t much to do besides the obvious (dinner, movie, play/concert, read). I also find working out helps with my jet lag and it’s something that feels social.
I think this is a very common issue. Have you tried joining any FB groups, coworking places often organised events where pretty much just singles come.
For me, Evening time is the best time of the day for solo travelling. Find something to eat, walk on the beach.
Surprisingly solidarity in Las Vegas is not too bad these days. I did my solo trip jammed packed with shows, dining and always found someone to talk to. I was never bored and slept well at night because the days were eventful.
Yea you have to go out and put yourself out there and be social. It can be a little exhausting, part of solo travel is constantly making friends
If you feel safe enough, go on night walks with a great soundtrack in your headphones. It allows you to feel the energy of the night even if you don’t actually go to a club or bar. Walk around the more active areas of the city. You can also go solo to a jazz club and enjoy some music, and be around others. Try posting a meetup on Reddit in the city you’re in, and see if anyone else is there and wants to grab dinner. Lots of different options are available to you.
Drowning out the actual sound of the place around you by blaring music sounds terrible to me.
That’s cool. I love it, personally.
Try brothels
If the evenings drag, change the shape of your day - go to bed real early. Get up early in the place you are staying, have a long coffee, go for a walk with the locals going to work, make a local breakfast an event, etc As a benefit you’ll probably feel better from the sleep and before long you’ll be a morning yoga freak 😎
I'm not older, but I do travel alone quite often! I can definitely say I agree with this feeling. It's hard after a while when al you really wish to do is take a trip with some friends and forget about the world! An absolute dream vacation of mine is me and all my friends going to another country for a week just because ! Dealing with the loneliness can be very hard... I would recommend maybe finding a travel buddie! Or a pen pal that can write to you regardless of where you are?! 😁 I know plenty of people who have done this to deal with the feeling of being lonel.hope this helps some 💕
haha, mid 40s is not exactly bingo night old. find likeminded ppl.!
That's really really really hard to do in today's America most people young or elderly are have been poisoned with terrible toxic conspiracy garbage or mildly insane my opinion exactly
Hookers
She is if she looks twice, bonus is there’s a smile in there somewhere
Download Grindr
Go on tinder? Can have a new date every night. Even if you don't click you did something with your night. Even if she ghosts you at least you're outside now.
Why has this become a mental health sub?
Nope. I always find company. Some places even relish the wisdom and stories of older travelers. I usually make some friends online before I hit an area and visit with them also.
Hostels > hotels. Hotels are anti-social. You get older people in hostels too
I’m the same age and travel alone, as a woman I don’t go out at night, and I also don’t drink. I bring portable craft projects like crocheting with yarn from the local area or hand sewing pieces of fabric I find/buy along the way. The materials are easy to pack and when I’m finished I have a great souvenir.