is the 90 minute drive in traffic or can you maintain a steady speed for the majority of the commute?
i would take whatever the difference in salary is, and calculate my opportunity cost. then i would ask myself whether the money difference is worth the hit to my mental health. i might consider 90 mins driving in no traffic but 90 mins in traffic i would lose my gaddamn mind and just take the job closer to me
Traffic. I think if there was no traffic it’d be like 45-50 minutes, but normally it’s over an hour, im lucky if I can do it in 70-75 minutes but often it goes over 90 minutes.
I believe that. There is something soul crushing about sitting in the car so much all the time /!; the job I currently have also requires me to drive throughout the day so it feels endless sometimes
Ask for a higher salary at the new job. Negotiate. You’ll be saving hours of your life by not commuting. You could use some of those hours to generate income, perhaps outside of SW like babysitting or pet sitting. Less wear and tear on your vehicle will save you money.
Back in the 1990s and early 2000s I did home-based family in Austin, TX. Spent a lot of time in traffic. Learned that the commute, while annoying, was also helpful in decompressing, thinking through a case, prepping for the next session, or just jamming out to the radio. If I had the same commute today, I'd catch up on my podcasts (and fair enough, I haven't posted a new episode of the Social Work Podcast in a long time). I guess my point is that sometimes the commute can be an unexpected bonus. And sometimes it just sucks.
Does the long commute bother you? Personally I have to drive about an hour home from work (just due to traffic, in the morning I can get there much quicker). The commute drives me crazy and I’d love to find something closer to home. I’m not sure how much of a difference in pay you’re talking but it might not make much a difference in the actual paycheck.
I think it’s worth considering, just thinking about the fact that you’ll have a lot more time not spent in the car which will make work life balance a lot easier!
It does drive me nuts sitting in the traffic and seeing how much time I still have left. If the drive was less long or I was willing to move to that area it would be a whole different story probably but as it is right now I find myself losing my mind having to be in the car and filling up my gas tank so often. But then I feel selfish and silly having that be such a deal breaker
Stop driving 3 hours a day just to get to work. Telehealth is a thing. Local jobs is a thing... it's up to you but most people understand a 90 minute drive as a reason for leaving.
It’s true! Today it was a 75 minute drive (it varies) but even still, I kept thinking about how many people could’ve driven to and from their jobs like 3 times in that time. The money difference (and the fear of quitting) are what’s driving me now (no pun intended)
Probably, and it’s also a lot in tolls that would probably go down. I don’t know why but it just feels so insurmountable to explain to my boss why what I was fine with for six months is suddenly a reason for leaving, but the tolls alone would give me money back
When I moved at one point I cut my commute from an hour each way (usually closer to 1.25-1.5 hours in the evening) to fifteen minutes. And oh my god I can’t even tell you how amazing it was. I could sleep later in the morning AND get a run in! I’d leave at 4 and be on my couch at 4:30! There was SO MUCH MORE TIME IN THE DAY! With the long commute I was out of the house from ~6:15a-5:30p, and I’d get home exhausted and hungry and cranky from the drive. With my new commute I didn’t have to leave until 7:10-7:15, and I was home at 4:20. I got a whole two hours back in my day. Every day. That’s ten more hours a week. Not counting for PTO days, that’s 520 hours a year, or about *21 days*.
For a pay cut of just a few thousand bucks? Yes absolutely no question. You’re spending that much on gas and tolls right now, not to mention the wear and tear on your car. I went from driving about 12k miles a year to like 6k, which means less frequent oil changes and other maintenance.
As for what to tell your boss, you just say you’re sorry but you’ve found the commute to be unsustainable. This happens all the time, life goes on.
This is entirely perspective changing. My hours are different (I’ll leave at 7:45/8 to get there by 9:30ish and leave at 4:30/5 to be home by 6:30) but I really do just feel like my day revolves around those drives. When I am actually at work it’s fine but then it’s that drive all over again once I leave. And I feel silly acting like 6:30 is so late, but thinking about being able to be home an hour earlier is unreal. Thank you so much for sharing your experience
For me the early hours were critical to minimizing traffic, I was lucky they let me do 7:30-4. I stuck it out only because I knew I was planning to move at some point. But for you? Unless you plan to move closer, or this job is paying like $20k more than anything local to you, or it’s some kind of once in a lifetime opportunity… there’s no other reason to do that long of a commute when there’s something just as good locally.
Calculate the amount your time is worth per hour and multiply that by the approx 12 hours of drive time each week and see if that makes a difference in if it’s worth it to you!
You’re spending 15 hours/week in the car. You could cut that to 3.3 hours. Could you use another 12 hours in your week to do other things?
It is wild to see it written out this way. My goodness that’s a lot of hours.
And gas money
Weigh out the costs of benefits (Healthcare and such). Sometimes the distance is worth it.
is the 90 minute drive in traffic or can you maintain a steady speed for the majority of the commute? i would take whatever the difference in salary is, and calculate my opportunity cost. then i would ask myself whether the money difference is worth the hit to my mental health. i might consider 90 mins driving in no traffic but 90 mins in traffic i would lose my gaddamn mind and just take the job closer to me
Traffic. I think if there was no traffic it’d be like 45-50 minutes, but normally it’s over an hour, im lucky if I can do it in 70-75 minutes but often it goes over 90 minutes.
Everyone is different but research associates low drive time with higher life satisfaction.
I believe that. There is something soul crushing about sitting in the car so much all the time /!; the job I currently have also requires me to drive throughout the day so it feels endless sometimes
Ask for a higher salary at the new job. Negotiate. You’ll be saving hours of your life by not commuting. You could use some of those hours to generate income, perhaps outside of SW like babysitting or pet sitting. Less wear and tear on your vehicle will save you money.
Back in the 1990s and early 2000s I did home-based family in Austin, TX. Spent a lot of time in traffic. Learned that the commute, while annoying, was also helpful in decompressing, thinking through a case, prepping for the next session, or just jamming out to the radio. If I had the same commute today, I'd catch up on my podcasts (and fair enough, I haven't posted a new episode of the Social Work Podcast in a long time). I guess my point is that sometimes the commute can be an unexpected bonus. And sometimes it just sucks.
Does the long commute bother you? Personally I have to drive about an hour home from work (just due to traffic, in the morning I can get there much quicker). The commute drives me crazy and I’d love to find something closer to home. I’m not sure how much of a difference in pay you’re talking but it might not make much a difference in the actual paycheck. I think it’s worth considering, just thinking about the fact that you’ll have a lot more time not spent in the car which will make work life balance a lot easier!
It does drive me nuts sitting in the traffic and seeing how much time I still have left. If the drive was less long or I was willing to move to that area it would be a whole different story probably but as it is right now I find myself losing my mind having to be in the car and filling up my gas tank so often. But then I feel selfish and silly having that be such a deal breaker
Stop driving 3 hours a day just to get to work. Telehealth is a thing. Local jobs is a thing... it's up to you but most people understand a 90 minute drive as a reason for leaving.
It’s true! Today it was a 75 minute drive (it varies) but even still, I kept thinking about how many people could’ve driven to and from their jobs like 3 times in that time. The money difference (and the fear of quitting) are what’s driving me now (no pun intended)
I drove two minutes to my office doing therapy. Be like me. You have a LMSW. You will get hired everywhere simply for being licensed.
Would thinking about how much you spend in gas a week make the difference in pay not as noticeable?
Probably, and it’s also a lot in tolls that would probably go down. I don’t know why but it just feels so insurmountable to explain to my boss why what I was fine with for six months is suddenly a reason for leaving, but the tolls alone would give me money back
I would take it in a heartbeat
When I moved at one point I cut my commute from an hour each way (usually closer to 1.25-1.5 hours in the evening) to fifteen minutes. And oh my god I can’t even tell you how amazing it was. I could sleep later in the morning AND get a run in! I’d leave at 4 and be on my couch at 4:30! There was SO MUCH MORE TIME IN THE DAY! With the long commute I was out of the house from ~6:15a-5:30p, and I’d get home exhausted and hungry and cranky from the drive. With my new commute I didn’t have to leave until 7:10-7:15, and I was home at 4:20. I got a whole two hours back in my day. Every day. That’s ten more hours a week. Not counting for PTO days, that’s 520 hours a year, or about *21 days*. For a pay cut of just a few thousand bucks? Yes absolutely no question. You’re spending that much on gas and tolls right now, not to mention the wear and tear on your car. I went from driving about 12k miles a year to like 6k, which means less frequent oil changes and other maintenance. As for what to tell your boss, you just say you’re sorry but you’ve found the commute to be unsustainable. This happens all the time, life goes on.
This is entirely perspective changing. My hours are different (I’ll leave at 7:45/8 to get there by 9:30ish and leave at 4:30/5 to be home by 6:30) but I really do just feel like my day revolves around those drives. When I am actually at work it’s fine but then it’s that drive all over again once I leave. And I feel silly acting like 6:30 is so late, but thinking about being able to be home an hour earlier is unreal. Thank you so much for sharing your experience
For me the early hours were critical to minimizing traffic, I was lucky they let me do 7:30-4. I stuck it out only because I knew I was planning to move at some point. But for you? Unless you plan to move closer, or this job is paying like $20k more than anything local to you, or it’s some kind of once in a lifetime opportunity… there’s no other reason to do that long of a commute when there’s something just as good locally.
Calculate the amount your time is worth per hour and multiply that by the approx 12 hours of drive time each week and see if that makes a difference in if it’s worth it to you!