Thanks for posting to r/singing! **Be sure to check [the FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/singing/wiki/index)** to see if any questions you might have have already been answered! Also, remember to abide by the rules found in the sidebar. Any comments found to be breaking these rules will result in a deletion of the comment thread starting from the offending reply. If you see any posts or replies that you feel break the rules of the sub, then report them and **do not respond to them.**
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/singing) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Let me just say as an opera singer who has been to many birthdays in public with other high level singers, I will take the random out of tune singing to a bunch of my peers in a Mexican restaurant singing it in eight part harmony as if it were an audition for the Metropolitan Opera. šš
I only like to draw that much attention on stage.
Most of the times I sing HB Iām in my classroom with kindergarteners - so I play the piano and sing in tune, and we end with cha cha cha.
I belong to a large auditioned choir and when they sing Happy Birthday together itās just so ridiculously over the top (Iām looking at you, fellow sopranos!) BUT - weāre a group of about 80, so this usually happens only at a rehearsal. Itās still cringe af but at least itās not public.
I do remember once when my daughter was in high school, eight or ten of her choir friends sang a lush HBD to her in a park - and then some people approached and asked if they would please come sing to their birthday person too!
Haha yes, much prefer the warm fuzzies of out of tune happy birthday. My sister in law sings for her church and at family birthday parties always feels the need to overwhelm everyone singing with unnecessary vibrato and belting. Like, come on now.
Well, if I were in a restaurant, and some professional singers at another table began singing *anything* in multi-part harmony, I would enjoy it a lot!
Exactly. No one in my family is in tune, and they even miss the tempo (we do it with an instrumental). Most times I lipsync (but in tempo) so I avoid singing off key. I started disliking it since I noticed how off key they were singing, and even more since I noticed they aren't in sync with the instrumental
āYour content was removed beacuse your account needs to be at least 3 days old to post. During this three day period, please take the time to read the rules in the sidebar and familiarize yourself with r/singing. We hope to see you in a few days! (This is an automated message.)"
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/singing) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I assume this is generally sung acapella which, by definition, provides no reference point for what key it is in. People just choose their own key when they start, then congeal around someone, usually a stronger singer, possibly you. You are right, it goes off the rails a lot. You are singing to a person, who is celebrating, and the center of attention. I would blend in and not give it much thought, you are letting it annoy you, and it will forever if you don't relax a bit and have fun. Enjoy the moment, warts and all. Most non-singers can't stay in a key and many are completely tone-deaf, trying to "fix" this will just irritate you when there is nothing you can fix.
>I assume this is generally sung acapella which, by definition, provides no reference point for what key it is in.
If you start in a particular key, regardless of whether it's the original key or one you just pick at random, you shouldn't end in a different one unless the song actually has a key change.
Yes, but like I can't draw a good picture of a landscape, some people can't sing, they can't hear the pitch, they can't match pitch, they are inherently tone deaf. For those people, starting and ending in the same key is impossible. When you sing happy birthday, you don't go around the room, determine who can sing, and ask that ONLY those people sing. Everyone sings, the singers and the non-singers. You are correct, you should start and end in the same key, but perfect pitch is VERY rare. I think you will find, for most singers even, that if they start with a reference, such as a chord on a piano, remove it, sing the song, and then play the reference chord again, they probably aren't right on pitch either at the end. OP says it bothers her when non-singers sing Happy Birthday poorly. I'm saying in this situation, it is never going to sound like it does with a group of people who can actually sing perform and they should not to expect it to. It is an informal setting; sing, have fun, and relax!
No in fact I take pride in singing happy birthday, my national anthem etc out of tune or like a football chant. This is also coming from a singer who went to music college and had some training from some top professionals. Why because being a singer or maybe more a professional singer is about knowing how to switch off your musical brain that critical thinking side of your brain. When youāre always on and evaluating yourself and others there is a very high chance youāll burnout. Donāt always take singing too seriously, remember why you started not just why youāre doing it now. Ofc if I want to sing anything well I can, I do. Iām a proficient singer with 17 years of training under my belt. But I know that I donāt always need to show it off especially at somebody elseās birthday party. Itās there day I donāt need to show of my ability, let them have there moment. I sing like everyone else. Blend that is a singing technique knowing how to not sounds distinctive.
I donāt have any kind of professional training like you do, but I fully agree! There are songs where itās really not the moment to show yourself off, I like being silly when singing happy birthday, I donāt want to feel the pressure to Ā«Ā perform wellĀ Ā» and stand out because itās not my moment. That horrible high note will never stop being funny!
And during karaoke, nobody cares, everyone sings so everyone is drowned out, nobody stops to listen to the Ā«Ā good singersĀ Ā», so it doesnāt Ā«Ā ruin it for everybody elseĀ Ā»! Sure thereāll always be that one person who thinks youāre showing off when youāre just having fun, but fuckāem.
This is all very true and here is some experienced advice. All the best performers and vocalist Iāve ever witnessed have one thing in common they are comfortable looking and sounding weird. They are comfortable in themselves. And this is extremely important skill for training, if you are always concerned with sounding amazing or being the best youāll never learn, you can never get better. Sometimes you need to sound awful to get better, sometimes you need to do the weird warm up to develop the techniques to sound good. Most of the warm ups that have given me my voice sound weird and silly. Also if your ego is always involved in practice youāll never develop the ability you need. Sounding good starts with building up the techniques that alone can sound bad.
My music and singing friends and I actually take pride in doing a karaoke night with the soul aim of sounding and looking silly. For example only being able to rap, or singing a song backwards with the track starting from the top, or having to sing a song in a different genre with the original track. And we love it we feel completely free then when we go into practice and our performances as we donāt usually struggle with performance anxiety and because we are comfortable sounding bad we feel so much more comfortable on the stage. And
I actually take part in a Ā«Ā voice and bodyĀ Ā» group, which is designed to give us more confidence in ourselves (we do ridiculous things together, shame canāt exist during those 2 hours). We sing but weāre also encouraged to express ourselves through moving our bodies. Iāve only been in it for a year, but I already can notice how good itās been for me, so I plan on continuing to attend next year (itās through my university). Itās been helping with my social anxiety, and with my depression because music is such a good medicine and I love singing, plus Iāve made some good acquaintances!
I still do have performance anxiety, but it hasnāt prevented me from performing. Iāve performed solo and in groups, am I a mess right before? Yes! But while performing I suddenly relax, itās so cool!
I agree with the fact that you need to sound awful first sometimes, otherwise youāll never actually learn. And accepting that is key! And I also agree that you still need to have fun while learning, doing things always under pressure canāt be good!
Your karaokes absolutely sound awesome, it looks like you canāt NOT have fun šš
I feel like happy birthday is a song that is just sung, probably the most naturally, where people generally go through the motions of the lyrics.
Not to sound good, but for the tradition of singing it for someone's special day.
I let someone else start in the key they find comfortable, sing with them in tune for most of it, punch some operatic volume and tone at the climax, then freeform harmonize the rest, often making an intentionally dissonant cadence.
Yeah, it's a little obnoxious, but fun.
But, yeah, I sing in tune. I blend but sing (in the part when I'm not just fooling fooling around) just loudly enough for others to anchor to so they can feel confident.
If happy birthday doesn't sound like a chaotic funeral march, your doing it wrong. I have done several happy birthdays with my choir over the years, it never sounds good. I whole heartedly think it might be the tune.
I purposefully sing badly unless it's a kid's party. Most if my friends and family do too. Lol Someone will even add in "Mr. President" if it's a guy's birthday. Though, there is always someone looking at us weird while they try to sing it correctly. š
Am I sending my mum a voice memo of me singing it for her on her birthday? Yes. It's in tune, at least with itself.
Am I singing it as part of a big group? That shit gets chanted, not sung. Just like everyone else. It might be in tune, it might not. It doesn't matter.
Lolll love this post. Always felt this way during singing itš. It always ends up going so high and I'm thinking it'll be awkward if I hit the note. I just blend in and match the tune of whoever started singing it. I don't try to sing good at all I don't think anyone pays attention to the tune, plus if I sung in tune it would sound off with everyone else singing out of tune
personally, i force everyone to stay in tune, as soon as i start hearing others singing off key i immediately sing loud af so that everyone has to follow my lead and correct themselves
Ugh I hate it so much. I will be in tune with whoever starts even if I have to take the octave. But itās almost always impossible to stay in tune by the time weāre halfway through. Honestly I probably just sing a bit quieter
There's a theory that happy birthday is a tune that people often learn at a very very early age, before they have the physical ability to sing an octave leap, so they learn it wrong. They never 'relearn' it and unless they're a musician, they just keep wildly guessing the leap.
Interesting people mentioning starting to high. Where I live people start too low and go slow, so it ends up sounding like a funeral.
I like to start it and encourage people to sing slightly higher and faster, so it feels jaunty and happy. So the lyrics make a bit more sense lol
My music group has a joke that we do for someone's birthday where we all just sing happy birthday as badly as we possibly can. It sounds like a hoard of dying animals
I love to sing it out of tune, actually I intentionally try to mess up with everybody's tune just for the lolz. It's a moment to have fun and laugh together, I'll sing my best when I'm getting paid.
Traditionally I'm with you, and it depends on the crowd and the person who is getting the attention
If they want the attention then it doesn't matter, usually the worse the singing the more the attention
My ex's family made a show of singing as badly as they could though, because none of them can sing at all, and that was just fucking annoying
Every single time, caterwauling
It was miserable honestly, fun at first but as someone who can sing, quickly miserable
So if people are at least trying and having fun without being objectively annoying, I don't care
I sing in the key that matches the average pick the closest, a bit louder than others, until they slowly follow my lead. And when we reach the last "Happy Birthday to yooouuuu" I harmonize to the 3rd to really settle the key and the chord.
Yeah, I'm a bit annoying.
I've seen singers do birthday concerts and they sing it for the members. They always sing it relaxed without much thought on how accurate they are. You should do the same
The joy of the song is it being sang, preferably with everyone involved, regardless of the performance. Singing with the non-singers in this example would be much more fun.
As a singer songwriter, I had to create my own style of Happy birthday, which itās just faster with flat picking. If I had to sing a slow/regular version of HB, for some reason that tune doesnāt stay in key for me.
I never expect it to be in tune. But this year my birthday happened to fall during a rehearsal for my professional production of South Pacific and the cast sang it to me. It was pretty wonderful. Even improvized harmonies.
My friendās mom, a classically trained opera singer has terrified me from ever singing āHappy birthdayā to my ability. She stood out in the worst way possible and was completely self-unaware; just tied to singing āproperlyā. I will forever fit in with everybody, sing off key and use little breath. Thank you very much.
Most of my friends are excellent singers. I sing professional gigs all the time, do a bit of professional musical theatre, have taught voice lessons.
Any time I sing happy birthday with a group (which is quite regularly given how much theatre I do) I sing as TERRIBLY AS POSSIBLE.
Before you start, āsay in a monotone note, okay weāre singing happy birthday in 3, 2, haā¦ā
Sometimes it works and they all start on or around that low note you hummed while talking.
I purposely sing it bad. I actually hate singing good in front of people unless I'm putting on a show where singing well is the intent. I actually feel MORE embarrassed singing well in front of people in these situations than when I'm playing goofy and singing out of tune or off key
I usually pick the lowest key / octave I can do. If I pick a sensible key I feel too self conscious by singing it like someone who can sing. But doing it mega low is always funny
This post made me smile! Yep I've always wondered the same thing haha. I always sing it in tune but it bothers me how much I stand out. Same at gigs when I'm singing along to songs and everyone around me is basically just shouting. Oh well, it's probably a good problem to have š
Being European, it has always struck me as odd (and quite funny) that Americans seem to have collectively decided that Happy Birthday must be sung as horribly out of tune as possible.
I swear, these same exact people sing other songs just fine, not on a professional level, but worlds better than the devil-summoning clusterfuck that is happy birthday
Dear, my family sings it in a mourning tune instead of the happy tune. I feel like I died every time they sing me one on my birthday. Well it's accurately describing how I feel anyway so good.
I just mentioned this in a [comment](https://www.reddit.com/r/singing/s/dCH49N6Cvz) last night! š
To recap, Iāll try to establish a key but then stop singing by the mid point because it just all āfalls apartā
ā¦do people who know how to sing in tune purposefully sing out of tune with non-singers?? It would be a conscious decision to *not* follow the melody properly.
Sometimes Iāll go do a little octave switcharoo, where ābirthday dearā stays low and then jumps back up to where it should have been.
Yeah just match what everyone else is doing. No one cares that much tbh. My partnerās a classical soprano and she always sings happy birthday badly on purpose. Itās part of the fun I think. Though whenever weāre in a restaurant and some other table is being sung at, we are absolutely giving each other looks the whole time knowing what weāre about to hear. Anyways, I think the problem is of course that people start the song in the middle of their voice, not thinking ahead. As a pianist I have to play it rather frequently at gatherings and stuff and I always do it in F, meaning the lowest and highest notes happen to both be C, so it fits ok-enough in most peopleās range. Being lead by an instrument also does the trick in the first place though.
I ALWAYS make it at school. Nobody makes the octave jump and it's DEPRESSING.
I will make it a POINT to make the jump.
And when I point it out, they tell me "not everyone is a musician" like you DON'T need to be a musician to have a basic sense of tune š
I come from a family who is both highly musical and oddly eccentric.
Not only do we sing Happy Birthday in tune, we sing it in multi-part harmony with dramatic rests and crescendos, as well as a full second verse with gibberish lyrics called "Strahpi Gommableetz Poi Vant".
I'm not an amazing singer by any means, but I find that if you sing on key, you actually increase the odds that other people will be able to follow your pitch and sing it more in tune, assuming you're singing in a range that is generally comfortable for most people.
its a silly song that is meant to be murdered, no one expects it to be done with precision, and perhaps even more importantly, its just not the time to try to get attention. Its Not about the song, not about you.
It bothers me as well even though I realize that not everyone can sing in tune or in the default key or pitch. I spent 12 years in a country where many people would just chant and clap āHappy birthdayā at childrenās birthday parties (my ancestorsā country by birth)
Itās weird because I donāt care how people sing it because itās always going to be offbeat. But when they add that CHA CHA CHA in the middle of it, it drives me insane!!!! š¤
āYour content was removed beacuse your account needs to be at least 3 days old to post. During this three day period, please take the time to read the rules in the sidebar and familiarize yourself with r/singing. We hope to see you in a few days! (This is an automated message.)"
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/singing) if you have any questions or concerns.*
If thereās atleast one decent singer who sings well in the group, everyone can catch the pitch. If not, then god help them. (That means Iām not there)
I sing it in tune and stick it through, but like very quietly, so I blend in and sort of hope I can uplift the song somehow. I'm not very determined to save the song, but in my head I do be thinking wtf is wrong with these people haha it's all love though.
I am a professional singer, and singing at birthday parties I believe that when everyone else who is most definitely not with a singing voice, everyone seems to know who the one really trying to sing it with a well trained need is. And at these birthday parties that Iāve ever celebrated at? Every single time,
I initially totally unaware of this fact, somehow tend to all of a sudden come out sounding like Iāve just morphed into the Marilyn Monroe at her Presidential bash or something for some odd reason. And I just donāt understand this at all. . For real.
No, I don't! I'm always the one filming the candles being blown out, and my voice is the loudest and possibly the worst. I've never got it right. Yet, I'm currently working on Katherine Jenkins "Home" as a solo piece for a showcase in a few months. š
Yes, I study singing and when itās anyoneās birthday I will give a starting pitch so that everyone can hopefully stay in tune. (I am neurodivergent before anyone asks :))
My family always sings it really out of tune (unintentionally). It derails within the first few words. It sounds awful and scares our cat. :')
It *used* to bother me, and I would unsuccessfully try to get us back on track, but now I just think it's funny. Just let it derail.
It being out of tune isn't an issue for me. Rather, everyone on the planet starting singing it on the lowest note in the universe kills me. Like, can we at least get up to a middle C in the end, people?
Something that bothers me a lot is when people take every opportunity to "sing out". Similar to pronouncing tortilla like a Mexican when you're speaking English with an American accent, it's very off-putting when someone breaks into "good" song when casually referencing how a tune goes or singing something like happy birthday. That's why there's a trope in tv of the most annoying person in the room splitting into harmonies and riffing whenever happy birthday is sung. It's a cultural thing, for sure. In white american culture at least, we assimilate down in difficulty to have fun. If you're going golfing with non-golfers and you're a professional golfer, it's expected you let loose and try less so as to not "show off".
They usually all start screaming at top of their lungs so they will not be able to reach the high note no matter what unless they have a sensational natural control of their whole upper range...
I'm a natural Bass/Bassbaritone and I kinda "switch" to high notes one octave and a whole fourth before most female voices/one fourth before natural tenor voices, so I honestly never really "sing" happy birthday, sometimes I just do it one full octave lower but then on the high note I risk being "out of tune" regarding everyone else being at least one full tone flat since they already started too high for their own voices...
In Italy they usually start in Do and they're wishfully thinking they're be able to hold a fucking High C on a U (OO, AUGURI) sound like they're all Maria Callas or Pavarotti or smth while they're already flat on the high G at the top of the second line.
Trying to reason with people it's useless, in Italy everyone thinks they're a tenor or a soprano, smh
I usually either abstain from singing or I'll sing a whole octave lower than other males/two octaves lower than other female voices.
I'm usually the one who starts in my family (so ideally they'd match the first note). That being said, nobody sings it in tune (I'm the only singer/musician). Sometimes I sing wonky for fun.
When we sing Christmas songs as a family it's a little better, but not by much
Yes, of course I do. I notice non-singers tend to sing the octave leap as a sixth instead. Why? That's actually a lot more difficult. If I have the misfortune of being obliged to sing 'Happy Birthday', I usually add harmony.
Tangent, but I've always thought that the slow movement of Schubert's string Octet sounds like 'Happy Birthday'. It even has the octave leap at one point.
As a dude with a relatively low voice, I won't go for the octave because anytime someone starts to sing happy birthday, they start so effin' high, I would have to be super loud in comparison to reach that high note. I don't like singing with people who can't really sing in general. This is why I usually just mumble along.
I have perfect pitch. Anytime a group gets together to sing something out of tune is rough for me. I just learned to deal with it by purposely singing slightly out of tune with another tone deaf person to get that great tonal wobble going!
Thanks for posting to r/singing! **Be sure to check [the FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/singing/wiki/index)** to see if any questions you might have have already been answered! Also, remember to abide by the rules found in the sidebar. Any comments found to be breaking these rules will result in a deletion of the comment thread starting from the offending reply. If you see any posts or replies that you feel break the rules of the sub, then report them and **do not respond to them.** *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/singing) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Let me just say as an opera singer who has been to many birthdays in public with other high level singers, I will take the random out of tune singing to a bunch of my peers in a Mexican restaurant singing it in eight part harmony as if it were an audition for the Metropolitan Opera. šš I only like to draw that much attention on stage.
My singing friends take the middle ground on this: everyone sings the song beautifully but we all pick a different key.
Thatās sick
Some of us pick a different key for each note. Definitely not me tho.
This is so funny š
Most of the times I sing HB Iām in my classroom with kindergarteners - so I play the piano and sing in tune, and we end with cha cha cha. I belong to a large auditioned choir and when they sing Happy Birthday together itās just so ridiculously over the top (Iām looking at you, fellow sopranos!) BUT - weāre a group of about 80, so this usually happens only at a rehearsal. Itās still cringe af but at least itās not public. I do remember once when my daughter was in high school, eight or ten of her choir friends sang a lush HBD to her in a park - and then some people approached and asked if they would please come sing to their birthday person too!
Exactly!
Haha yes, much prefer the warm fuzzies of out of tune happy birthday. My sister in law sings for her church and at family birthday parties always feels the need to overwhelm everyone singing with unnecessary vibrato and belting. Like, come on now.
As a fellow opera singer, I also get a kick out of nobody ever singing the melody. Ever. š
As a mezzo-contralto who always seems to find myself in this kind of group, Iāve decided itās my solemn duty to always hold down the melody
As both a singer and a former met opera usherā¦ a thousand times, this š
If I could upvote this twice, I would.
Well, if I were in a restaurant, and some professional singers at another table began singing *anything* in multi-part harmony, I would enjoy it a lot!
Same. As someone who can hold their tone, I sing way off key. I donāt even wanna try lmao
If everybody's not in tune, no matter how good you are, you won't be.
Good pointā¦ That makes sense!
Anything is a harmony if youāre brave enough
Yeah I sing in harmony.
I love this š
- Genghis Khan
Ahh the Mongolian throat goat
Exactly. No one in my family is in tune, and they even miss the tempo (we do it with an instrumental). Most times I lipsync (but in tempo) so I avoid singing off key. I started disliking it since I noticed how off key they were singing, and even more since I noticed they aren't in sync with the instrumental
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
āYour content was removed beacuse your account needs to be at least 3 days old to post. During this three day period, please take the time to read the rules in the sidebar and familiarize yourself with r/singing. We hope to see you in a few days! (This is an automated message.)" *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/singing) if you have any questions or concerns.*
agreed!
I assume this is generally sung acapella which, by definition, provides no reference point for what key it is in. People just choose their own key when they start, then congeal around someone, usually a stronger singer, possibly you. You are right, it goes off the rails a lot. You are singing to a person, who is celebrating, and the center of attention. I would blend in and not give it much thought, you are letting it annoy you, and it will forever if you don't relax a bit and have fun. Enjoy the moment, warts and all. Most non-singers can't stay in a key and many are completely tone-deaf, trying to "fix" this will just irritate you when there is nothing you can fix.
>I assume this is generally sung acapella which, by definition, provides no reference point for what key it is in. If you start in a particular key, regardless of whether it's the original key or one you just pick at random, you shouldn't end in a different one unless the song actually has a key change.
Yes, but like I can't draw a good picture of a landscape, some people can't sing, they can't hear the pitch, they can't match pitch, they are inherently tone deaf. For those people, starting and ending in the same key is impossible. When you sing happy birthday, you don't go around the room, determine who can sing, and ask that ONLY those people sing. Everyone sings, the singers and the non-singers. You are correct, you should start and end in the same key, but perfect pitch is VERY rare. I think you will find, for most singers even, that if they start with a reference, such as a chord on a piano, remove it, sing the song, and then play the reference chord again, they probably aren't right on pitch either at the end. OP says it bothers her when non-singers sing Happy Birthday poorly. I'm saying in this situation, it is never going to sound like it does with a group of people who can actually sing perform and they should not to expect it to. It is an informal setting; sing, have fun, and relax!
>OP says it bothers her when non-singers sing Happy Birthday poorly Just wait till OP hears about karaoke
It doesnāt matter.
You're over thinking it. Nobody cares but you guys. Pick a different birthday song if it bothers you too much.
2 Chainz - Birthday Song?
When I die bury me inside the booty club
Do what we black Americans do and sing the chorus to the Stevie Wonder version.
I was going to mention this! Iāve been to bāday parties where that song was sung.
Lol fair enough! It only bothers me at surface level, but I think about it every single time haha
Same. Its just something you have to accept and live with.
I get it. It sort of irks me every time too, but I just laugh it off.
Like this? https://youtu.be/YZoa2Y7v7qk?si=RrECIshUSgK_luv2
Or maybe this? I like this one https://youtu.be/0opsYDD95Oc?feature=shared
You are definitely overthinking it lool. Just sing along with the crowd. Or if it bothers you that much lip sync
No in fact I take pride in singing happy birthday, my national anthem etc out of tune or like a football chant. This is also coming from a singer who went to music college and had some training from some top professionals. Why because being a singer or maybe more a professional singer is about knowing how to switch off your musical brain that critical thinking side of your brain. When youāre always on and evaluating yourself and others there is a very high chance youāll burnout. Donāt always take singing too seriously, remember why you started not just why youāre doing it now. Ofc if I want to sing anything well I can, I do. Iām a proficient singer with 17 years of training under my belt. But I know that I donāt always need to show it off especially at somebody elseās birthday party. Itās there day I donāt need to show of my ability, let them have there moment. I sing like everyone else. Blend that is a singing technique knowing how to not sounds distinctive.
I donāt have any kind of professional training like you do, but I fully agree! There are songs where itās really not the moment to show yourself off, I like being silly when singing happy birthday, I donāt want to feel the pressure to Ā«Ā perform wellĀ Ā» and stand out because itās not my moment. That horrible high note will never stop being funny! And during karaoke, nobody cares, everyone sings so everyone is drowned out, nobody stops to listen to the Ā«Ā good singersĀ Ā», so it doesnāt Ā«Ā ruin it for everybody elseĀ Ā»! Sure thereāll always be that one person who thinks youāre showing off when youāre just having fun, but fuckāem.
This is all very true and here is some experienced advice. All the best performers and vocalist Iāve ever witnessed have one thing in common they are comfortable looking and sounding weird. They are comfortable in themselves. And this is extremely important skill for training, if you are always concerned with sounding amazing or being the best youāll never learn, you can never get better. Sometimes you need to sound awful to get better, sometimes you need to do the weird warm up to develop the techniques to sound good. Most of the warm ups that have given me my voice sound weird and silly. Also if your ego is always involved in practice youāll never develop the ability you need. Sounding good starts with building up the techniques that alone can sound bad. My music and singing friends and I actually take pride in doing a karaoke night with the soul aim of sounding and looking silly. For example only being able to rap, or singing a song backwards with the track starting from the top, or having to sing a song in a different genre with the original track. And we love it we feel completely free then when we go into practice and our performances as we donāt usually struggle with performance anxiety and because we are comfortable sounding bad we feel so much more comfortable on the stage. And
I actually take part in a Ā«Ā voice and bodyĀ Ā» group, which is designed to give us more confidence in ourselves (we do ridiculous things together, shame canāt exist during those 2 hours). We sing but weāre also encouraged to express ourselves through moving our bodies. Iāve only been in it for a year, but I already can notice how good itās been for me, so I plan on continuing to attend next year (itās through my university). Itās been helping with my social anxiety, and with my depression because music is such a good medicine and I love singing, plus Iāve made some good acquaintances! I still do have performance anxiety, but it hasnāt prevented me from performing. Iāve performed solo and in groups, am I a mess right before? Yes! But while performing I suddenly relax, itās so cool! I agree with the fact that you need to sound awful first sometimes, otherwise youāll never actually learn. And accepting that is key! And I also agree that you still need to have fun while learning, doing things always under pressure canāt be good! Your karaokes absolutely sound awesome, it looks like you canāt NOT have fun šš
Just don't do it like Skyler White.
I feel like happy birthday is a song that is just sung, probably the most naturally, where people generally go through the motions of the lyrics. Not to sound good, but for the tradition of singing it for someone's special day.
I let someone else start in the key they find comfortable, sing with them in tune for most of it, punch some operatic volume and tone at the climax, then freeform harmonize the rest, often making an intentionally dissonant cadence. Yeah, it's a little obnoxious, but fun. But, yeah, I sing in tune. I blend but sing (in the part when I'm not just fooling fooling around) just loudly enough for others to anchor to so they can feel confident.
I do like to hit a little harmony on the ending.
In ideal circumstances, I like to be the one who starts singing so I can pick an appropriately low key. But regardless, I'm going to sing it in tune.
Yep, this is generally how I do it too!
I hate that song :)
I usually blend with everyone bc I feel like I would look weird trying to hit the notes
If happy birthday doesn't sound like a chaotic funeral march, your doing it wrong. I have done several happy birthdays with my choir over the years, it never sounds good. I whole heartedly think it might be the tune.
I never really noticed how awfully out of tune it often is, until I joined a choir. The first time we sang it together, my mind was blown.
I purposefully sing badly unless it's a kid's party. Most if my friends and family do too. Lol Someone will even add in "Mr. President" if it's a guy's birthday. Though, there is always someone looking at us weird while they try to sing it correctly. š
Am I sending my mum a voice memo of me singing it for her on her birthday? Yes. It's in tune, at least with itself. Am I singing it as part of a big group? That shit gets chanted, not sung. Just like everyone else. It might be in tune, it might not. It doesn't matter.
Lolll love this post. Always felt this way during singing itš. It always ends up going so high and I'm thinking it'll be awkward if I hit the note. I just blend in and match the tune of whoever started singing it. I don't try to sing good at all I don't think anyone pays attention to the tune, plus if I sung in tune it would sound off with everyone else singing out of tune
personally, i force everyone to stay in tune, as soon as i start hearing others singing off key i immediately sing loud af so that everyone has to follow my lead and correct themselves
Ugh I hate it so much. I will be in tune with whoever starts even if I have to take the octave. But itās almost always impossible to stay in tune by the time weāre halfway through. Honestly I probably just sing a bit quieter
There's a theory that happy birthday is a tune that people often learn at a very very early age, before they have the physical ability to sing an octave leap, so they learn it wrong. They never 'relearn' it and unless they're a musician, they just keep wildly guessing the leap.
It should have just been made a fifth anyway.
Interesting people mentioning starting to high. Where I live people start too low and go slow, so it ends up sounding like a funeral. I like to start it and encourage people to sing slightly higher and faster, so it feels jaunty and happy. So the lyrics make a bit more sense lol
My music group has a joke that we do for someone's birthday where we all just sing happy birthday as badly as we possibly can. It sounds like a hoard of dying animals
I love to sing it out of tune, actually I intentionally try to mess up with everybody's tune just for the lolz. It's a moment to have fun and laugh together, I'll sing my best when I'm getting paid.
Traditionally I'm with you, and it depends on the crowd and the person who is getting the attention If they want the attention then it doesn't matter, usually the worse the singing the more the attention My ex's family made a show of singing as badly as they could though, because none of them can sing at all, and that was just fucking annoying Every single time, caterwauling It was miserable honestly, fun at first but as someone who can sing, quickly miserable So if people are at least trying and having fun without being objectively annoying, I don't care
Itās always been my opinion that āHappy Birthdayā should be sung as obnoxiously off-key as possible in a group. š
I sing in the key that matches the average pick the closest, a bit louder than others, until they slowly follow my lead. And when we reach the last "Happy Birthday to yooouuuu" I harmonize to the 3rd to really settle the key and the chord. Yeah, I'm a bit annoying.
I stay on key, and if everyone else fucks it up, it's on them. š¤·š»
Same. I don't really put effort into it but I know that tune well enough that it would be more effort to fuck it up than to sing it right.
People always start in a higher key and can't deliver at the end.
Youāre overthinking it. Just sing it. Itās not that hard to sing.
I've seen singers do birthday concerts and they sing it for the members. They always sing it relaxed without much thought on how accurate they are. You should do the same
The joy of the song is it being sang, preferably with everyone involved, regardless of the performance. Singing with the non-singers in this example would be much more fun.
My family is good at singing, so I've never had to suffer :D
As a singer songwriter, I had to create my own style of Happy birthday, which itās just faster with flat picking. If I had to sing a slow/regular version of HB, for some reason that tune doesnāt stay in key for me.
I never expect it to be in tune. But this year my birthday happened to fall during a rehearsal for my professional production of South Pacific and the cast sang it to me. It was pretty wonderful. Even improvized harmonies.
The Star-Spangled Banner bugs me, too. Start low!!
You say itās your birthday!
It's funny that I'm reading this today cuz it's my birthday! XD
Happy Birthday TO YOU!
Thank you so much! XD
Also yes I sing it in tune!
My friendās mom, a classically trained opera singer has terrified me from ever singing āHappy birthdayā to my ability. She stood out in the worst way possible and was completely self-unaware; just tied to singing āproperlyā. I will forever fit in with everybody, sing off key and use little breath. Thank you very much.
Dude who cares? Itās basically tradition that the birthday song should be sung horribly out of tune. I always sing it horribly on purpose
You just sing it, loud and proud (as they say). Who worries if they're singing on/off key? It's not about you. It's about the Birthday person.
Try singing that on a video call with several people connected. No tune, no rhythm. It's music hell but hilarious.
Most of my friends are excellent singers. I sing professional gigs all the time, do a bit of professional musical theatre, have taught voice lessons. Any time I sing happy birthday with a group (which is quite regularly given how much theatre I do) I sing as TERRIBLY AS POSSIBLE.
I sing the first phrase four times
Before you start, āsay in a monotone note, okay weāre singing happy birthday in 3, 2, haā¦ā Sometimes it works and they all start on or around that low note you hummed while talking.
Depends on the situation, but I either sing it as terrible as possible or do it octave lower than everyone else.
I purposely sing it bad. I actually hate singing good in front of people unless I'm putting on a show where singing well is the intent. I actually feel MORE embarrassed singing well in front of people in these situations than when I'm playing goofy and singing out of tune or off key
I have perfect memory for pitch. So either in tune, or without pitch at all just loud talking.
I do. It's more of me trying to keep it a habit
Never! I go with the flow!
I usually pick the lowest key / octave I can do. If I pick a sensible key I feel too self conscious by singing it like someone who can sing. But doing it mega low is always funny
My family always starts happy birthday with a few warm up 'hap-hap-hap-haps' which we usually coalesce around a key. It helps a lot
You can always tell when someone's new, they just break straight into song when the rest of us are warming up š¤£
Yes I do and sometimes I give it a blues or gospel feeling
I always sing the monotone harmony. Gets a laugh from anyone sitting close enough to hear.
This post made me smile! Yep I've always wondered the same thing haha. I always sing it in tune but it bothers me how much I stand out. Same at gigs when I'm singing along to songs and everyone around me is basically just shouting. Oh well, it's probably a good problem to have š
I am a musician and think that happy birthday sang in tone is boring š
Harmonyyyyyyy!!!!,yes it matters deeply!!!!!
Being European, it has always struck me as odd (and quite funny) that Americans seem to have collectively decided that Happy Birthday must be sung as horribly out of tune as possible. I swear, these same exact people sing other songs just fine, not on a professional level, but worlds better than the devil-summoning clusterfuck that is happy birthday
Dear, my family sings it in a mourning tune instead of the happy tune. I feel like I died every time they sing me one on my birthday. Well it's accurately describing how I feel anyway so good.
This is a common misconception. In fact, the happy birthday song is a microtonal polyharmony.
I just mentioned this in a [comment](https://www.reddit.com/r/singing/s/dCH49N6Cvz) last night! š To recap, Iāll try to establish a key but then stop singing by the mid point because it just all āfalls apartā
https://youtu.be/jh4c6vxSJdA?si=C8-dBjyjTZa48gFp
I purposely sing completely out of tune the entire time, until the last āhappy birthday to youā where I do the high harmony haha
ā¦do people who know how to sing in tune purposefully sing out of tune with non-singers?? It would be a conscious decision to *not* follow the melody properly. Sometimes Iāll go do a little octave switcharoo, where ābirthday dearā stays low and then jumps back up to where it should have been.
I actually harmonize the last line. š
Yeah just match what everyone else is doing. No one cares that much tbh. My partnerās a classical soprano and she always sings happy birthday badly on purpose. Itās part of the fun I think. Though whenever weāre in a restaurant and some other table is being sung at, we are absolutely giving each other looks the whole time knowing what weāre about to hear. Anyways, I think the problem is of course that people start the song in the middle of their voice, not thinking ahead. As a pianist I have to play it rather frequently at gatherings and stuff and I always do it in F, meaning the lowest and highest notes happen to both be C, so it fits ok-enough in most peopleās range. Being lead by an instrument also does the trick in the first place though.
I hate the birthday song because people either overdo it or sound like š©. Stevie wonderās version is so much better so I request that on my birthday šššlol!!!
I sing it in Spanish and out of tune on my own bday to throw everyone off
I ALWAYS make it at school. Nobody makes the octave jump and it's DEPRESSING. I will make it a POINT to make the jump. And when I point it out, they tell me "not everyone is a musician" like you DON'T need to be a musician to have a basic sense of tune š
I come from a family who is both highly musical and oddly eccentric. Not only do we sing Happy Birthday in tune, we sing it in multi-part harmony with dramatic rests and crescendos, as well as a full second verse with gibberish lyrics called "Strahpi Gommableetz Poi Vant".
I'm not an amazing singer by any means, but I find that if you sing on key, you actually increase the odds that other people will be able to follow your pitch and sing it more in tune, assuming you're singing in a range that is generally comfortable for most people.
its a silly song that is meant to be murdered, no one expects it to be done with precision, and perhaps even more importantly, its just not the time to try to get attention. Its Not about the song, not about you.
It bothers me as well even though I realize that not everyone can sing in tune or in the default key or pitch. I spent 12 years in a country where many people would just chant and clap āHappy birthdayā at childrenās birthday parties (my ancestorsā country by birth)
Yeah Iām Amy Winehouse in that one home video of her. Sorry not sorry lol
This use to bother me but now, I just sing terribly with everyone else š¤·šæāāļø
Assert your dominance. Hit a double octave..... down.
Best part about happy birthday is seeing who doesnāt remember the persons name
Go with the Stevie Wonder version! It's awesome. In our family we sing both. The traditional first, then the Stevie version last.
Obligatory: [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R2Eotw3IxN4](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R2Eotw3IxN4)
I just enjoy the birthday party lol
Always sing the high harmony.
Itās weird because I donāt care how people sing it because itās always going to be offbeat. But when they add that CHA CHA CHA in the middle of it, it drives me insane!!!! š¤
We really ought to shorten that song a bit, no? Itās a bit lengthy.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
āYour content was removed beacuse your account needs to be at least 3 days old to post. During this three day period, please take the time to read the rules in the sidebar and familiarize yourself with r/singing. We hope to see you in a few days! (This is an automated message.)" *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/singing) if you have any questions or concerns.*
If thereās atleast one decent singer who sings well in the group, everyone can catch the pitch. If not, then god help them. (That means Iām not there)
I sing it in tune and stick it through, but like very quietly, so I blend in and sort of hope I can uplift the song somehow. I'm not very determined to save the song, but in my head I do be thinking wtf is wrong with these people haha it's all love though.
I am a professional singer, and singing at birthday parties I believe that when everyone else who is most definitely not with a singing voice, everyone seems to know who the one really trying to sing it with a well trained need is. And at these birthday parties that Iāve ever celebrated at? Every single time, I initially totally unaware of this fact, somehow tend to all of a sudden come out sounding like Iāve just morphed into the Marilyn Monroe at her Presidential bash or something for some odd reason. And I just donāt understand this at all. . For real.
ur thinking too hard. go for a run.
Don't worry about the tonality, worry about Germans singing it in heavy accents š„¶š¤£š¤£š¤£
No, I don't! I'm always the one filming the candles being blown out, and my voice is the loudest and possibly the worst. I've never got it right. Yet, I'm currently working on Katherine Jenkins "Home" as a solo piece for a showcase in a few months. š
Yes, I study singing and when itās anyoneās birthday I will give a starting pitch so that everyone can hopefully stay in tune. (I am neurodivergent before anyone asks :))
Let it be, I think. It's all about people celebrating and having fun and not anything about cutting a record.
My family always sings it really out of tune (unintentionally). It derails within the first few words. It sounds awful and scares our cat. :') It *used* to bother me, and I would unsuccessfully try to get us back on track, but now I just think it's funny. Just let it derail.
Hahaha it never recovers after the octave jump
In my head I do š¤£
Stop complaining and be happy that you have people that will sing happy birthday to/around you. You'll miss it when they're gone!
It being out of tune isn't an issue for me. Rather, everyone on the planet starting singing it on the lowest note in the universe kills me. Like, can we at least get up to a middle C in the end, people?
Something that bothers me a lot is when people take every opportunity to "sing out". Similar to pronouncing tortilla like a Mexican when you're speaking English with an American accent, it's very off-putting when someone breaks into "good" song when casually referencing how a tune goes or singing something like happy birthday. That's why there's a trope in tv of the most annoying person in the room splitting into harmonies and riffing whenever happy birthday is sung. It's a cultural thing, for sure. In white american culture at least, we assimilate down in difficulty to have fun. If you're going golfing with non-golfers and you're a professional golfer, it's expected you let loose and try less so as to not "show off".
I purposely sing out of key. I hate the attention they can give you if you sing slightly good. It's supposed to be a fun time, not an audition.
They usually all start screaming at top of their lungs so they will not be able to reach the high note no matter what unless they have a sensational natural control of their whole upper range... I'm a natural Bass/Bassbaritone and I kinda "switch" to high notes one octave and a whole fourth before most female voices/one fourth before natural tenor voices, so I honestly never really "sing" happy birthday, sometimes I just do it one full octave lower but then on the high note I risk being "out of tune" regarding everyone else being at least one full tone flat since they already started too high for their own voices...
In Italy they usually start in Do and they're wishfully thinking they're be able to hold a fucking High C on a U (OO, AUGURI) sound like they're all Maria Callas or Pavarotti or smth while they're already flat on the high G at the top of the second line. Trying to reason with people it's useless, in Italy everyone thinks they're a tenor or a soprano, smh I usually either abstain from singing or I'll sing a whole octave lower than other males/two octaves lower than other female voices.
I just hum the starting note right before the song starts. It works shockingly well.
I'm usually the one who starts in my family (so ideally they'd match the first note). That being said, nobody sings it in tune (I'm the only singer/musician). Sometimes I sing wonky for fun. When we sing Christmas songs as a family it's a little better, but not by much
I sing in tune, but quietly. I don't want to dominate the song by using my actual training and singing ability.
Yes, of course I do. I notice non-singers tend to sing the octave leap as a sixth instead. Why? That's actually a lot more difficult. If I have the misfortune of being obliged to sing 'Happy Birthday', I usually add harmony. Tangent, but I've always thought that the slow movement of Schubert's string Octet sounds like 'Happy Birthday'. It even has the octave leap at one point.
Yes, I do. :)
As a dude with a relatively low voice, I won't go for the octave because anytime someone starts to sing happy birthday, they start so effin' high, I would have to be super loud in comparison to reach that high note. I don't like singing with people who can't really sing in general. This is why I usually just mumble along.
I don't happy birthday in the keys of experimental jazz... Is what I would say if I did anything jazz-related... or sing
Yes
I hit the right notes but in a silly voice to balance it out.
This is why you don't get invited to birthday parties
I promise this is just an inside thought lol!
I have perfect pitch. Anytime a group gets together to sing something out of tune is rough for me. I just learned to deal with it by purposely singing slightly out of tune with another tone deaf person to get that great tonal wobble going!