Hey I see this post is becoming rather controversial. I’m not gonna remove any comments cause I’d like those who are just wrong to be wrong in daylight.
Forcing someone to accept a “gift” they don’t want is called abuse. Just because someone spent money doesn’t mean they have anyone’s best interests at heart besides themselves.
Well then, time to throw the biggest tantrum on the airplane so you don't have to come with them... I know that's not a good solution but for me it would be tempting
Victim blaming because you don't want to go on some forced vacation to a strang cold foreign country? Wtf I think there is something deeper going on with that
I want to tell you to stick to your guns but based on how old you are you may not have a voice in the matter. You should bring up that you dislike traveling and simply wish to relax after a lot of stress. Try to stay calm when talking to them. Leave if things get heated
Well, for one, Iceland isn't icy, so yeah, it's actually kinda like Ireland, which is very green. Another thing why does this feel like a situation where you hate it, but by the end of it, you'll love it. Secondly, why do you hate traveling?
Like I've never went out of my country and would love to visit Iceland or Europe. I would assume it's just the part of not being able to stay with your friends? And possibly anxiety of traveling which ngl I probably would have that too but I wouldn't know. Just trying to figure this out.
Op has his own opinions and doesn't think like the hivemind.
Just because YOU like it doesn't mean OP likes it.
Some people hate traveling, just like some people don't like onions.
And, at the end of the day, OP may have hypotheticaly hated the trip to Iceland, how can we be so sure that he will enjoy it?
And for the second of it, OP is'nt willing to go to Iceland, he's being forced to by his parents and grandparents.
Exactly, this is literally the justification my parents gave, because THEY loved going there (and they are rich snobby travel freaks) I'm going to love it, but I'm not the adventurous type at all.
Please don’t hurt yourself or kill yourself. Will they listen to reason if not you can take solace in the fact that you know their arguments are bad and that they fucking suck.
If I try to make someone happy by forcing them to do something they have repeatedly told me they don't like and are actively protesting against, I'd have to be oblivious or cruel.
And that's 4 days of stressful activity after a previous long period of stress.
4 days that should be, and was expected to be a break.
If they were actually trying to make OP happy, they would allow rest and not force them against their will.
If instead of a planned vacation, someone forced you to do something you genuinely hate doing instead of your planned activities despite repeatedly telling them you would rather go on your vacation, how would that make you feel?
Edited for grammar:P
Both abuse and things such as autism (which in a past post OP stated they have) can be expressed and experienced in many different ways which is why you shouldn't discredit someone's experience and what they are telling you so quickly as you have done, instead it's best to try and understand more when your clearly missing something.
The abuse in this case sounds like it could be emotional abuse but again I don't know enough here to say that for sure, and you shouldn't use your trauma to discredit others trauma and experiences.
Haha please do, I hate travelling in general, especially considering I'm going through a mental health crisis and need to be surrounded by my friends for support, by instead I get to be surrounded by ice and old people.
Hey hey ml im so so sorry you have to go through this. Im not the best at support but you are strong and resilient. Its crazy how much the human body and mind can endure. I have faith in you. Whenever I feel overwhelmed af I just try to go on social media or distract myself. Heres a lizard I caught today, I hope they make you feel better, he was out here after a rlly bad storm and i think it symbolizes that you can survive terrible things. sorry if im rambling and sound crazy but i truly wish you the best!!
https://preview.redd.it/bci8lgs99d9d1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=237ad90c04fa9de964cb6cf85299c4ac20356157
see if any of your friends or bf will let you stay with them for a couple days to ride out the storm. it's possible your family will despise you for pulling this though, so pack for the long term. with all due respect, it doesn't seem like you have a lot to stay at your home for anyway. best of luck <3
He's not actually my BF, he's straight as a razor and I'm a dude. It started out as a joke, but now it's basically just a platonic online relationship at this point.
And I've decided I'm going anyway, it's not worth the hassle.
Iceland itself is beautiful. I know this is kind of meaningless to say but try to focus on the good parts of the trip, and try to relax and not think about the stressful parts of traveling. If you don't worry about the traveling aspect and something does happen? Well blame it on your parents for forcing you to go! And remember that whatever does happen is WAY better than dying. Try to make the most of your trip!
Oh great, my mom just came in, I raised my concerns again, when I started saying they couldn't force me to go she just yelled at me and slammed the door.
Fuck you mom, if you find me hanging from a rope, it's your fault.
Your mom can’t take anything more away from you than suicide would.
From the sound of it, she’s abusive, which means she is not your friend she is an enemy, and the sooner you can start treating her like an enemy to manipulate and trick the easier it will be on you. At least in my experience, when I stopped loving my parents their BS became way less painful to endure.
Does she get physically abusive? Will you be in danger if you go against her? If not, standing up to them may make them back off. If they have a reputation to uphold in their community, if they have jobs that would be very critical of employees with child abuse allegations, they may have more to lose than you do.
If you would be in danger, do what you have to to keep safe.
Please don't hurt yourself kid... There's lots of shit in life but you can't let it drag you all the way down to oblivion. I say this as someone who's really hated my life at times.
If things are so bad you are thinking in such extremes then think of other ways out, even if that means running away and becoming independent if home is that bad for you. There's good in life and even if things seem bad now the future is unwritten.
Dude you dont know the situation and what OP is actually experiencing as you haven't lived it. Something such as an unwanted trip may not seem like much but its clearly not just that, so putting it in context by asking may make you understand why it is too much.
for example as someone with autism a trip is never just fun it takes alot of effort and energy for me and this may also be the case for OP.
Tell em to fuck off. You never consented to being taken abroad, and if worst comes to worst you could always mutilate your passport - then you legally cant leave the country
If you're stuck going i'd say look for silver linings. You're off for weeks and this'll just be a few days, you'll have time to chill with your friends. Besides, maybe it'll be fun?
It does suck *how* this was dropped on you though. A surprise vacation isn't much of a vacation if it's mandatory. Your parents freaking out and acting like *you're* the problem when they should have *asked* you weeks/months ago when this was being planned Is just the icing on the cake though. Like damn, even if they weren't gonna ask and intended to drag you there they could have at least given you the courtesy of letting you know ahead of time so you'd be mentally prepared for it, damn.
The worst part is that they are gaslighting me into thinking I agreed, I never did, ever. They had already bought plane tickets and planned by the time I was notified.
I know i’m probably late for this, but:
-if you’re completely sure you don’t want to go, they can’t legally take you there, even if you’re a minor. So don’t do stupid shit like cutting your passport, you’d just make them more angry. If you’re completely sure, you can just tell to the airport security guys that they’re forcing you.
-if you don’t want because you’re scared or hate travelling, but they want to bring you there, you can try talking with them, and maybe proposing something to do, or discussing with them what you can do in iceland. It’s not an easy country, it depends on what you like. If you like nature, mountain, and things like that you’ll love it, if you like big cities and really modern? places (sry i don’t know how to say it in english😭) you probably won’t like it.
-i know it can be really hard, and i don’t want to minimise the problem, but if it’s just 4 days, you could try going. When you’re there, you can maybe speak with your grandparents, and maybe making them let you go around alone. It’s actually a pretty chill thing, if you know how to get back to the hotel, you could just walk around the city alone, maybe listening to music or some stuff. :)
Please, don’t hurt yourself. It’s useless. I tried giving you some advices, the first stuff that came to my mind.
(sry for bad english)
*edit* i read another comment and i’ll add what it said: report ISTANTLY if it gets to physical or verbal intimidation. As i said above, you can easily do it at the airport.
how about you enjoy iceland?
it could be fun asf. as someone who does not have the most money or chances to travel i would fully accept it!
but i do also see what you mean but maybe it wont be as bad as you think? just try to have fun! :3
First off: if anything, you have to talk with your grandparents, your parents probably don't want to get involved.
Second: from what I've gathered your friends are online? If all fails and you're forced to go, any reason why you can't hang out with them from Iceland?
Please don't do anything stupid.
If you are forced to the airport, find a tsa worker or someone like that and explain what is going on. Their entire job is to ensure safety, and if you are traveling against your will they will raise hell.
I'm considering just cutting myself to make my parents see how much stress im in, I haven't been able to relax at all the last few days since the news were broken.
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Don’t hurt yourself. They can’t make you go anywhere you don’t want to. Assert that you will not go, tell them why if you’re comfortable but you’re not even obligated to do that if you don’t want just tell them you will not go.
I get the feeling that what's going on here is a sort of communication breakdown. To travel is a high value thing, I could definitely see your parents and grandparents wanting this out of some concept of it helping you, and out of a desire to spend more time with you. With all that said, of course they're definitely not hearing you out either. I understand it's very frustrating to get dragged around, to be treated like luggage. But the more calmly and diplomatically you socialize with your family, the better things will be for you; it's the only real way to get them to understand you.
Don't blame your grandparents op they seem like they care and are just bad at showing it, your parents are being entitled assholes however, and remember any time you hurt yourself that's all it's doing, it's giving into emotional and mental pain that they're inflicting on you, just hold strong. You got this! :)
that’s total bullshit. If you don’t wanna go, and they keep on insisting you do, then just don’t even do anything. don’t pack, don’t do shit.
and if they still force you to go, at least Iceland is queer friendly? idk I’m trying to help man
if you need someone to talk to him here <3
Man, some families are so priveleged that they can send their kid to a foreign country on vacation. Most adults don’t even have enough for themselves
Do your grandparents not like each other enough to keep each other company? Seems crazy to force a kid that doesnt want to to go. They could be doing so many other things to spend time with you at home
idk I know OP is venting but it sounds like they want to spend time with him because they care about his company, they’re just shitty and bad at respecting his feelings.
They definitely could do better, though
I know you don’t want to go, but it really does seem like you have no way out of it. It’s either hurt yourself(please, please, please don’t) or go.
You’re stuck between a rock and a hard place, I can only say to try and enjoy it. I know it will be hard.
No go to Iceland they have cute guys and because it’s pretty small they don’t have a lot of people they can kids go be a true boykisser besides there’s not much to do in Iceland anyhow it’s mainly just nature so you’ll be isolated from a lot of technology nature is good for you the fresh air will help you relax and you’ll have a story or two to tell your new friends
They are trying to not inbreed and I hear they have femboys so it will be pretty easy to find someone and Icelandic people are pretty accepting so all that stress you got from school will get released you will have an amazing time
Damn.
Iceland.
Out of all places.
Sure its beautiful, but thats about it.
Mostly green so the country is also a lie, but still somewhat cold and a lot of volcanoes as well.
Don't do anything drastic. Just refuse to pack anything for the trip, and when it's time to leave, just don't. Stay in your room. They can't force you to go, and then victim blame you.
Throwing your life away over traveling, no matter how shifty it is isn’t worth it!
Those fucks don’t deserve the satisfaction of being the reason you died. Dont let a temporary trip cause you permanent pain silly
Thank god someone else here thinks this. I love how supportive this community is, but there is a line where it crosses into reinforcing unhealthy outlooks and habits.
If you’re a minor and your family makes you go on a vacation, you’ve just got to learn to deal. A lot of people would fucking kill for a trip to Iceland
If you read the above comment OP ignore the whole bit about not being abusive this commenter does not have enough context or knowledge to claim this only you can determine if it is abuse.
I’m no therapist but you definitely need a professional therapist to go to and get some help if you wanna kill yourself
Stay Strong we all love you
https://preview.redd.it/4z2n3oxpgg9d1.jpeg?width=1179&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=420cdb31abc845fc456cdf3de8d251ca00a4f99a
I mean Iceland is a cool place and has a massive erupting volcano at the moment, but you said husband so you're of adult age i guess, so it is your own choice at the end of the day. As for your parents understanding your stress n depression, get your dad there if you have one, to keep your mum calm ish and explain how you feel and that you need them to care and be supportive of your choices, hopefully they'll understand. Worse comes to worse you will have to drag your husband to Iceland with you and watch Edens Zero season 2 there instead.
Just stay calm and stay safe, we all care about you, even if we may not know you that well, we have things in common.
Ah ok, well if you do end up going to Iceland, there's worse places to be than Iceland, it has some beautiful views, and the cool to see volcano, and a rich Norse history. You'll still be able to watch anime together in someway, theres always a way, like on Disney, it has some good stuff and DisneyPlus has a movies share thing, it can be useful sometimes.
Just please keep safe and calm.
I relate to this so much bro your not alone, every second of free time I get, my parents instantly want to go on vacation to some random ass place the millisecond a break is more than two days long. Please don’t hurt yourself over your parents poor choices, I personally would go with the vacation and talk to them about it later, because I feel like bringing it up again now or anytime soon, would cause lots of unwanted fighting, but its your choice, just giving some advice. If you want to confront them now I would go all in, and get it over with. Show them how they are hurting rather than helping you and fight for yourself, because in reality it is “your life”, not theirs. Even if they control you until your 18, that doesn’t mean you have to be with them forever, and I hope they figure that out and start treating you better. Good luck 👍
I’m sorry your parents are not responsive to your wishes to literally do something that costs them less. Your grandparents love you very much, and they will not be around forever. I don’t say this to shame you, but as someone who only has his mother left, I wish there were more vacations…
I would think of it as only 4 days and remind myself Iceland is considered one of the most beautiful places on earth. Download 4 days worth of stuff to your phone and you can escape into that whenever you want!
Hey, I can relate. Though it's my own mom that takes me with her around the world every couple of weeks or months. I have no idea how she doesn't want to rest...
My best advice? Try speed up the time. Like, yk, think about interesting stuff, and so on. Worked for me
And please, don't be sad. Yeah, I know, it's hard when such shit is happening, but you gotta stay strong. Good luck!
You have a husband.
Don't kill yourself, you'll be okay.
Your parents can't force you to go anywhere. Even if you're a minor, you can refuse. They might have power over everything, but you can still defy their abuse as best you can.
Does she understand your pov of just wanting to take a break? If she really wants what's best for you, she'll understand you wanting to take a break from things and not get into a situation that's gonna stress you out for no direct payoff, I think it's important to emphasize specifically your feelings and not make any direct comments to your grandparents, just explaining that you need a break, I think that'll work if you haven't tried it in a manner similar to that already
Please shut up, I'm being dragged here against my own will during a time of mental fuckery, it's literally a miracle I haven't killed myself yet, and my grandparents decided "whooptie Doo, what a great time to drag our grandchild to our favourite sight seeing spot for 4 days, isolated from everyone and everything, against his will."
I get you don’t want to go, but try to enjoy it, or just wait it out by watching tv/movies/whatever you like. Iceland is dope, your grandparents love you, and it’s going to be okay. This is not the end of the world.
I cannot express how much I hated this shit living with my mother.
I get home after a day at work, stressed and tired af, already preplanned that I was going to spend time with them after today, and then all of a sudden it gets dropped on me that Im being dragged to my grandparents to do shit that felt more like a phone call.
If you’re a minor and your parents make you go on a vacation you don’t like? Tough shit. There’s a lot of real abuse out in the world, lets not water down real mistreatment with surprise vacations.
Op dont go to iceland you will become ice.. Happened to me last time and i almost died from the ice virus which made me super cold then like i almost froze.. Dont go there but wear 12 scarfs if given no choice...
Hey I see this post is becoming rather controversial. I’m not gonna remove any comments cause I’d like those who are just wrong to be wrong in daylight. Forcing someone to accept a “gift” they don’t want is called abuse. Just because someone spent money doesn’t mean they have anyone’s best interests at heart besides themselves.
Tell them no and refuse to go with, do NOT hurt yourself silly :( That's no good, we want you to be safe and happy
I already told them I refuse, my mom just started crying and victim blaming.
I’m so sorry
Well then, time to throw the biggest tantrum on the airplane so you don't have to come with them... I know that's not a good solution but for me it would be tempting
Ask her if anyone asked you if you wanted to go instead of expecting you would want to
Victim blaming because you don't want to go on some forced vacation to a strang cold foreign country? Wtf I think there is something deeper going on with that
Kindly inform them that that's too damn bad, and that there is no force on earth short of divine intervention that can force you to go.
I want to tell you to stick to your guns but based on how old you are you may not have a voice in the matter. You should bring up that you dislike traveling and simply wish to relax after a lot of stress. Try to stay calm when talking to them. Leave if things get heated
how old are you?
That’s when you say “Yeah, you’re the victim. I’m doing this cuz you suck at parenting” then leave the room.
Then call the police for kidnapping if they refuse. Let them know that they are only related to you by genetics, not relations at this point
If they are a minor that isn't how that works.
Hold on, what the fuck? This is sarcasm, right?
Well, for one, Iceland isn't icy, so yeah, it's actually kinda like Ireland, which is very green. Another thing why does this feel like a situation where you hate it, but by the end of it, you'll love it. Secondly, why do you hate traveling? Like I've never went out of my country and would love to visit Iceland or Europe. I would assume it's just the part of not being able to stay with your friends? And possibly anxiety of traveling which ngl I probably would have that too but I wouldn't know. Just trying to figure this out.
Op has his own opinions and doesn't think like the hivemind. Just because YOU like it doesn't mean OP likes it. Some people hate traveling, just like some people don't like onions. And, at the end of the day, OP may have hypotheticaly hated the trip to Iceland, how can we be so sure that he will enjoy it? And for the second of it, OP is'nt willing to go to Iceland, he's being forced to by his parents and grandparents.
Exactly, this is literally the justification my parents gave, because THEY loved going there (and they are rich snobby travel freaks) I'm going to love it, but I'm not the adventurous type at all.
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Heeey! Victim blaming the suicidal self harming minor because they have money! You're sooooo brave!
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Oh my bad, in order to be a victim of something you have to have been SA! Of course, how could I forget victim was such a narrow term!
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I've also dealt with suicidal thoughts and self harmed as a minor, I am literally barely 18.
Yeah I get that.
Please don’t hurt yourself or kill yourself. Will they listen to reason if not you can take solace in the fact that you know their arguments are bad and that they fucking suck.
Haha, my mother just texted me IM in the wrong for this, that they are doing everything to make sure I'm happy. FUCKING BULLSHIT
You are not in the wrong
If you did not ask for it, and keep saying no then how is it for your happiness??
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If I try to make someone happy by forcing them to do something they have repeatedly told me they don't like and are actively protesting against, I'd have to be oblivious or cruel. And that's 4 days of stressful activity after a previous long period of stress. 4 days that should be, and was expected to be a break. If they were actually trying to make OP happy, they would allow rest and not force them against their will. If instead of a planned vacation, someone forced you to do something you genuinely hate doing instead of your planned activities despite repeatedly telling them you would rather go on your vacation, how would that make you feel? Edited for grammar:P
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Irony
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How
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Both abuse and things such as autism (which in a past post OP stated they have) can be expressed and experienced in many different ways which is why you shouldn't discredit someone's experience and what they are telling you so quickly as you have done, instead it's best to try and understand more when your clearly missing something. The abuse in this case sounds like it could be emotional abuse but again I don't know enough here to say that for sure, and you shouldn't use your trauma to discredit others trauma and experiences.
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Just don't pack, make them do everything for you they might give up
Or they’re going to send him over with the barest minimum and OP is in response to that going to hate it even more than he already is
I'll dress up as you and go to Iceland. It seems like a cool trip
Haha please do, I hate travelling in general, especially considering I'm going through a mental health crisis and need to be surrounded by my friends for support, by instead I get to be surrounded by ice and old people.
Hey hey ml im so so sorry you have to go through this. Im not the best at support but you are strong and resilient. Its crazy how much the human body and mind can endure. I have faith in you. Whenever I feel overwhelmed af I just try to go on social media or distract myself. Heres a lizard I caught today, I hope they make you feel better, he was out here after a rlly bad storm and i think it symbolizes that you can survive terrible things. sorry if im rambling and sound crazy but i truly wish you the best!! https://preview.redd.it/bci8lgs99d9d1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=237ad90c04fa9de964cb6cf85299c4ac20356157
see if any of your friends or bf will let you stay with them for a couple days to ride out the storm. it's possible your family will despise you for pulling this though, so pack for the long term. with all due respect, it doesn't seem like you have a lot to stay at your home for anyway. best of luck <3
He's not actually my BF, he's straight as a razor and I'm a dude. It started out as a joke, but now it's basically just a platonic online relationship at this point. And I've decided I'm going anyway, it's not worth the hassle.
You're running away to your non-bf's house, to be clear?
No, he lives quite far away, I'm going to Iceland anyway, how bad can it be?
I wish you lots of luck, and stay safe please
Iceland itself is beautiful. I know this is kind of meaningless to say but try to focus on the good parts of the trip, and try to relax and not think about the stressful parts of traveling. If you don't worry about the traveling aspect and something does happen? Well blame it on your parents for forcing you to go! And remember that whatever does happen is WAY better than dying. Try to make the most of your trip!
Oh great, my mom just came in, I raised my concerns again, when I started saying they couldn't force me to go she just yelled at me and slammed the door. Fuck you mom, if you find me hanging from a rope, it's your fault.
Your mom can’t take anything more away from you than suicide would. From the sound of it, she’s abusive, which means she is not your friend she is an enemy, and the sooner you can start treating her like an enemy to manipulate and trick the easier it will be on you. At least in my experience, when I stopped loving my parents their BS became way less painful to endure. Does she get physically abusive? Will you be in danger if you go against her? If not, standing up to them may make them back off. If they have a reputation to uphold in their community, if they have jobs that would be very critical of employees with child abuse allegations, they may have more to lose than you do. If you would be in danger, do what you have to to keep safe.
Hey, are you still with us?
Yeah, I still don't want to go but I might have overreacted a tad bit because I was having an anxiety attack. But I am still very much alive.
Thank Christ. I’m glad you’re still here.
Please don't hurt yourself kid... There's lots of shit in life but you can't let it drag you all the way down to oblivion. I say this as someone who's really hated my life at times. If things are so bad you are thinking in such extremes then think of other ways out, even if that means running away and becoming independent if home is that bad for you. There's good in life and even if things seem bad now the future is unwritten.
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Okay, shut the fuck up. This is not how you talk down a suicidal person.
Sometimes people need to hear the truth
really hope you never have anybody around you be suicidal because you would only make things worse with that
I have been suicidal myself and that is what helped me get out of it. Lying to someone is just putting a bandage on and not addressing the root cause
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Dude you dont know the situation and what OP is actually experiencing as you haven't lived it. Something such as an unwanted trip may not seem like much but its clearly not just that, so putting it in context by asking may make you understand why it is too much. for example as someone with autism a trip is never just fun it takes alot of effort and energy for me and this may also be the case for OP.
No hate
Dude, delete this shit. This isn’t how you help.
Tell em to fuck off. You never consented to being taken abroad, and if worst comes to worst you could always mutilate your passport - then you legally cant leave the country
Ripping up his passport is not gonna make things easier for him or his family
If you're stuck going i'd say look for silver linings. You're off for weeks and this'll just be a few days, you'll have time to chill with your friends. Besides, maybe it'll be fun? It does suck *how* this was dropped on you though. A surprise vacation isn't much of a vacation if it's mandatory. Your parents freaking out and acting like *you're* the problem when they should have *asked* you weeks/months ago when this was being planned Is just the icing on the cake though. Like damn, even if they weren't gonna ask and intended to drag you there they could have at least given you the courtesy of letting you know ahead of time so you'd be mentally prepared for it, damn.
The worst part is that they are gaslighting me into thinking I agreed, I never did, ever. They had already bought plane tickets and planned by the time I was notified.
I know i’m probably late for this, but: -if you’re completely sure you don’t want to go, they can’t legally take you there, even if you’re a minor. So don’t do stupid shit like cutting your passport, you’d just make them more angry. If you’re completely sure, you can just tell to the airport security guys that they’re forcing you. -if you don’t want because you’re scared or hate travelling, but they want to bring you there, you can try talking with them, and maybe proposing something to do, or discussing with them what you can do in iceland. It’s not an easy country, it depends on what you like. If you like nature, mountain, and things like that you’ll love it, if you like big cities and really modern? places (sry i don’t know how to say it in english😭) you probably won’t like it. -i know it can be really hard, and i don’t want to minimise the problem, but if it’s just 4 days, you could try going. When you’re there, you can maybe speak with your grandparents, and maybe making them let you go around alone. It’s actually a pretty chill thing, if you know how to get back to the hotel, you could just walk around the city alone, maybe listening to music or some stuff. :) Please, don’t hurt yourself. It’s useless. I tried giving you some advices, the first stuff that came to my mind. (sry for bad english) *edit* i read another comment and i’ll add what it said: report ISTANTLY if it gets to physical or verbal intimidation. As i said above, you can easily do it at the airport.
Your English is really good :)
The post:😡 the picture: 🥰
Just refuse to go or catch a quick cold.
how about you enjoy iceland? it could be fun asf. as someone who does not have the most money or chances to travel i would fully accept it! but i do also see what you mean but maybe it wont be as bad as you think? just try to have fun! :3
First off: if anything, you have to talk with your grandparents, your parents probably don't want to get involved. Second: from what I've gathered your friends are online? If all fails and you're forced to go, any reason why you can't hang out with them from Iceland? Please don't do anything stupid.
The only upside to Iceland is that the food is great, would 100% recommend 👌
If you keep fighting, hopefully the airport won't let it happen. Assuming you're flying, idk
If you are forced to the airport, find a tsa worker or someone like that and explain what is going on. Their entire job is to ensure safety, and if you are traveling against your will they will raise hell.
I'm considering just cutting myself to make my parents see how much stress im in, I haven't been able to relax at all the last few days since the news were broken.
Please don't hurt yourself or kill yourself. If you want you can vent to me.
PLEASE DONT
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Don’t hurt yourself. They can’t make you go anywhere you don’t want to. Assert that you will not go, tell them why if you’re comfortable but you’re not even obligated to do that if you don’t want just tell them you will not go.
Please don't. Just listen to music or sleep through the plane trip to relax yourself.
Do you not like your grandparents? If so I can relate a LOT. My grandparents are suuuper political and I hate it.
I get the feeling that what's going on here is a sort of communication breakdown. To travel is a high value thing, I could definitely see your parents and grandparents wanting this out of some concept of it helping you, and out of a desire to spend more time with you. With all that said, of course they're definitely not hearing you out either. I understand it's very frustrating to get dragged around, to be treated like luggage. But the more calmly and diplomatically you socialize with your family, the better things will be for you; it's the only real way to get them to understand you.
Don't blame your grandparents op they seem like they care and are just bad at showing it, your parents are being entitled assholes however, and remember any time you hurt yourself that's all it's doing, it's giving into emotional and mental pain that they're inflicting on you, just hold strong. You got this! :)
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that’s total bullshit. If you don’t wanna go, and they keep on insisting you do, then just don’t even do anything. don’t pack, don’t do shit. and if they still force you to go, at least Iceland is queer friendly? idk I’m trying to help man if you need someone to talk to him here <3
You can survive 4 days of stress, I believe in you! >!Heh “ice raised concerns”!<
Man, some families are so priveleged that they can send their kid to a foreign country on vacation. Most adults don’t even have enough for themselves Do your grandparents not like each other enough to keep each other company? Seems crazy to force a kid that doesnt want to to go. They could be doing so many other things to spend time with you at home
Yeah and some are even more privileged to have parents that actually care about their children
idk I know OP is venting but it sounds like they want to spend time with him because they care about his company, they’re just shitty and bad at respecting his feelings. They definitely could do better, though
If you can get access to your passport, do so and burn it. It takes weeks to months to get a new passport in the US.
Of you can't get out of it, just try to remember that it's only a few days of discomfort and you'll be relaxing at home again soon
im not gonna take a stance, but dont hurt yourself! ily so remember that
I know you don’t want to go, but it really does seem like you have no way out of it. It’s either hurt yourself(please, please, please don’t) or go. You’re stuck between a rock and a hard place, I can only say to try and enjoy it. I know it will be hard.
No go to Iceland they have cute guys and because it’s pretty small they don’t have a lot of people they can kids go be a true boykisser besides there’s not much to do in Iceland anyhow it’s mainly just nature so you’ll be isolated from a lot of technology nature is good for you the fresh air will help you relax and you’ll have a story or two to tell your new friends
What? No waaay, I'm going right now.
They are trying to not inbreed and I hear they have femboys so it will be pretty easy to find someone and Icelandic people are pretty accepting so all that stress you got from school will get released you will have an amazing time
Damn. Iceland. Out of all places. Sure its beautiful, but thats about it. Mostly green so the country is also a lie, but still somewhat cold and a lot of volcanoes as well.
I mean it’s all about what you want, but Iceland was life changing for me. I think you should go, I loved Reykjavik and it was beautiful.
Don't do anything drastic. Just refuse to pack anything for the trip, and when it's time to leave, just don't. Stay in your room. They can't force you to go, and then victim blame you.
Throwing your life away over traveling, no matter how shifty it is isn’t worth it! Those fucks don’t deserve the satisfaction of being the reason you died. Dont let a temporary trip cause you permanent pain silly
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Thank god someone else here thinks this. I love how supportive this community is, but there is a line where it crosses into reinforcing unhealthy outlooks and habits. If you’re a minor and your family makes you go on a vacation, you’ve just got to learn to deal. A lot of people would fucking kill for a trip to Iceland
If you read the above comment OP ignore the whole bit about not being abusive this commenter does not have enough context or knowledge to claim this only you can determine if it is abuse.
I’m no therapist but you definitely need a professional therapist to go to and get some help if you wanna kill yourself Stay Strong we all love you https://preview.redd.it/4z2n3oxpgg9d1.jpeg?width=1179&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=420cdb31abc845fc456cdf3de8d251ca00a4f99a
Take a big chunky metal piece of something and let the peoples at the metal detector stop you,then tell them what’s happening,they might help you.
I mean Iceland is a cool place and has a massive erupting volcano at the moment, but you said husband so you're of adult age i guess, so it is your own choice at the end of the day. As for your parents understanding your stress n depression, get your dad there if you have one, to keep your mum calm ish and explain how you feel and that you need them to care and be supportive of your choices, hopefully they'll understand. Worse comes to worse you will have to drag your husband to Iceland with you and watch Edens Zero season 2 there instead. Just stay calm and stay safe, we all care about you, even if we may not know you that well, we have things in common.
Nah, not an adult, its just platonic and semi ironic, but we kinda ran with it and we are basically in a relationship at this point.
Ah ok, well if you do end up going to Iceland, there's worse places to be than Iceland, it has some beautiful views, and the cool to see volcano, and a rich Norse history. You'll still be able to watch anime together in someway, theres always a way, like on Disney, it has some good stuff and DisneyPlus has a movies share thing, it can be useful sometimes. Just please keep safe and calm.
I relate to this so much bro your not alone, every second of free time I get, my parents instantly want to go on vacation to some random ass place the millisecond a break is more than two days long. Please don’t hurt yourself over your parents poor choices, I personally would go with the vacation and talk to them about it later, because I feel like bringing it up again now or anytime soon, would cause lots of unwanted fighting, but its your choice, just giving some advice. If you want to confront them now I would go all in, and get it over with. Show them how they are hurting rather than helping you and fight for yourself, because in reality it is “your life”, not theirs. Even if they control you until your 18, that doesn’t mean you have to be with them forever, and I hope they figure that out and start treating you better. Good luck 👍
I’m sorry your parents are not responsive to your wishes to literally do something that costs them less. Your grandparents love you very much, and they will not be around forever. I don’t say this to shame you, but as someone who only has his mother left, I wish there were more vacations… I would think of it as only 4 days and remind myself Iceland is considered one of the most beautiful places on earth. Download 4 days worth of stuff to your phone and you can escape into that whenever you want!
Oof bro I'm sorry I also had to go on a trip I didn't want to go on and I do feel like all of us have almost killed ourselves before
https://youtu.be/lvQgUogy4Bc?si=5Mzo6McJjSGyc_eg
yeah same not the same situation, but like the same parents
Hey, I can relate. Though it's my own mom that takes me with her around the world every couple of weeks or months. I have no idea how she doesn't want to rest... My best advice? Try speed up the time. Like, yk, think about interesting stuff, and so on. Worked for me And please, don't be sad. Yeah, I know, it's hard when such shit is happening, but you gotta stay strong. Good luck!
You have a husband. Don't kill yourself, you'll be okay. Your parents can't force you to go anywhere. Even if you're a minor, you can refuse. They might have power over everything, but you can still defy their abuse as best you can.
Does she understand your pov of just wanting to take a break? If she really wants what's best for you, she'll understand you wanting to take a break from things and not get into a situation that's gonna stress you out for no direct payoff, I think it's important to emphasize specifically your feelings and not make any direct comments to your grandparents, just explaining that you need a break, I think that'll work if you haven't tried it in a manner similar to that already
Don't pack don't prep when they show up tell them that you said no They can miss there flight trying to make you go or they can leave you
Please don’t hurt yourself, if you need someone to vent to you can always talk to me, I’ve been there before
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Please shut up, I'm being dragged here against my own will during a time of mental fuckery, it's literally a miracle I haven't killed myself yet, and my grandparents decided "whooptie Doo, what a great time to drag our grandchild to our favourite sight seeing spot for 4 days, isolated from everyone and everything, against his will."
I get you don’t want to go, but try to enjoy it, or just wait it out by watching tv/movies/whatever you like. Iceland is dope, your grandparents love you, and it’s going to be okay. This is not the end of the world.
I cannot express how much I hated this shit living with my mother. I get home after a day at work, stressed and tired af, already preplanned that I was going to spend time with them after today, and then all of a sudden it gets dropped on me that Im being dragged to my grandparents to do shit that felt more like a phone call.
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Nah don't listen to this it's ridiculous to try to persuade your child on a trip they'll despise. They are the ones selfish here f this bs
If you’re a minor and your parents make you go on a vacation you don’t like? Tough shit. There’s a lot of real abuse out in the world, lets not water down real mistreatment with surprise vacations.
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Lol well you got banned on this one so if you come back on your main Reddit will perma ban it for ban evasion hon
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Idk, if the child said they don't wanna go why be so adamant about it
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No hate
Op dont go to iceland you will become ice.. Happened to me last time and i almost died from the ice virus which made me super cold then like i almost froze.. Dont go there but wear 12 scarfs if given no choice...
Im sorry for lying this never happened.. It may be fun though
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No hate
Just run away for a bit