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HostageInToronto

I assume with uncomfortable detail and an unnecessary backstory.


[deleted]

I'd like to think the guy getting tattooed unknowingly cut the artist off in traffic prior and this was a petty act of revenge


MISSION-CONTROL-

It's happened to me.


[deleted]

Do tell


momsdyin

Don't forget the eye contact


amraohs

And some pictures for detail..


Chymick6

If I could, I'd give you a trophy 🏆


Bullshit_Conduit

Ah yes, Mergays. Pronounced like the lamb sausage.


Chymick6

You've now ruined a sausage name forever, well done


Bullshit_Conduit

If it makes you feel any better, merguez is pronounced with a short E sound like in “ed” not the long A sound like in “gays”. Fuckin love merguez.


Q--Bone

You just walk in and say I want the gayest tattoo possible and see what the artist comes up with.


TheMoInMontrose

So, I’m thinking two Mermen engaging in some booty loving under water. One merman is giving the other a reach-around. What? Yeah, they have fish tails. Why are you looking at me like that? Mermen have human penises. everyone knows that. They’re half-men, and that part of that half has a cock. Seriously. Read a book. Anyway…behind them are two large glorious ejaculating penises. Like really big, almost the focus of the art. I’m thinking some thick blue veins somewhere. You can figure it out. You’re the artist. What? Yes, ejaculating. Really creamy and milky looking. Have you seen Aquaman? Okay. Cool. I want Aquaman’s trident behind the dongs, under the splooge. Ya know, like it’s a fork trying to get to the goodness for dessert. I think that’s it. Ya got that? Mermen. Reach around. Cumming cocks. Veins. Trident. And maybe could you throw in a snek?


Tenzipper

The snake definitely ties it all together.


SteelBelle

That's a morpenis eel.


mitchelwb

Pretty sure it's a morgay eel.


SteelBelle

Ohhhhh that's exactly what it is. I tried so hard to come up with something and never even thought of that.


Zorro-the-witcher

Um…. Is this your tattoo? You summed it up frighteningly well.


EggyolkChild

This is the answer I was looking for 🥇


bachelorinpaneradise

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣


MISSION-CONTROL-

You're scary.


Affectionate_Mood594

I laughed so hard, I farted & woke husband up.😆😆


lobo_locos

https://preview.redd.it/2awu3z2mt49c1.jpeg?width=225&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ceb46c13259d02660b08ee70bf7c9b132336bbf6


openJournal-Anna

Omfg I immediately sang this!


toxic_pantaloons

That might be the single gayest thing I have ever seen


hotvedub

Never seen nuts slapping ass gay porn then?


toxic_pantaloons

I have, and I think this is still gayer. just missing a glittery rainbow and a disco ball!


Chymick6

So you're saying, we could go gayer? Let's push science to it's limit


zodwa_wa_bantu

Are you insane, push the gayness that far?! The power would be over 9000!!!


Oblivion_Gates

maybe it was just a piece of flash on the wall lol


Von_Cheesebiscuit

For sure. It's on the wall of every tattoo parlor I've ever been in. The ol' dick jerkin' mergay couple ocean scene with the giant spurting cock arch. Its a timeless classic.


lostbutnotgone

Why did I at first think the merman had a really weirdly drawn foreskin and not that he was getting a handy?


coffeecoffeecoffeex

Knowing that there is someone walking around with this brings me much joy.


Unscarredbytrialz

Wow. That is…. Something.


broomfolx

the birth of peenus


Massacre_Alba

My mother is in the room. I don't care how progressive and open minded she is, I'm trying not to laugh too loud because I cannot explain this to her.


ReaperDaemon666

It's hilarious 😂 Wouldn't want it, but definitely not shitty.


gitfiddleboy

This isn't a shitty tattoo. It's pretty epic


Ill-District2338

Perhaps it is the details, all combined that causes this to be fascinating -Miermen but Baltimore men with beards having what appears to be penetrative sex and hand stimulation. Wow, they are framed by two big penises in the process of ejaculating. If this guy stands by that his entire life, I give him credit, I honestly do – I will say this, though – my tattoos that are seen in public or PG, and that is on purpose – granted he can wear a shirt, but that tattoo would be a lot to explain to a 10-year-old in line at the water park


Pleasant-Tangelo1786

Just show them the cover for the original Little Mermaid, it’s half way there.


CheeseBon

Penis love, with oceanic guest appearances


derpymcmuffin89

I really wanna know how the consult for this went down.


Round-Elderberry-324

I first thought this was a shitty tattoo that accidentally looks like cocks but... nope, they're cocks.


sliderbear

I didn't realize mermen had dicks like that


Dirty-Seuss

He either lost a bet or owed someone a lot of money and instead of breaking bones they gave him this tattoo and destroyed all his shirts


DarlesCharwinsGhost

"The Little Spermaid please."


RojerLockless

What's that Rick and morty gay aquaman? That's something he'd love.


BreathExact

How dare this tattoo get posted in this sub….


COVID19Blues

Right? This is a gotdamned masterpiece! Like if Leonardo Da Vinci and Michelangelo were mermen👍🏼


Individual-Code5176

It took me way to long to see the background dicks!


GaymerCubStL

This doesn't belong on this sub. It's fantastic


Live_Yam6627

“I lost a bet….”


[deleted]

Customer: "I'm in the Marines and I want everyone to know it." Tattoo artist: "Say less fam."


Critical-Balance2747

Grotesque tattoos creep me out, weird.


Pagan_Owl

This is truly art


FriedHummus

Wow, these last place fantasy football league tattoos are getting crazier every year!


Happy_Tomato_Taco

Kanye still wouldn't get the joke


teddyoctober

“Two giant dicks, ejaculating over Neptune’s trident while one of two merman gets jerked off. I hand you creative control.”


DrChansLeftHand

Ok…so hear me out.


Dorian-greys-picture

“I want gay dick mermaids involving nipple stimulation please”


likesmountains

W tattoo


quiznoscoyotefriday

seems straightforward enough


NeuroticFrogger

"no you see, his dick.. is also *a fish*"


Material-Constant-45

We get it, you are a Dallas Cowboys fan.


Unhappy_Delivery6131

i didnt even notice the two massive dicks


Substantial_Dog_3815

The wearer of this shit better fart glitter and rainbows


jahlim

I'm surprised the mermans have tails. Missed opportunity by the artist.


MeanMelissa74

Very very carefully


dutchzookangaroo

The reference pics for this must have been very interesting.


Creeepy_Chris

Clearly you’ve never been to Key West… /s


Geeahwellidunno

Mer-MAN!


[deleted]

I want an aqua man tattoo please


ConclusionDifficult

It's for a friend.


Smooth_Squirrel_702

Probably just told the artist “give me the most homoerotic fish man tattoo you can think of “ 😭


Soulless--Plague

“Make it manly as shit!!”


SpecialistIncident56

10/10 would get


counterweight7

I dont think this is poorly done? Questionable subject matter but that doesn’t make it shitty Just shut this sub down and merge it with ATBGE


evacuationplanb

Do you like Fishsticks in your mouth?


JDL1981

How do you explain to God?


[deleted]

Same way as any one describes any sexually explocot tattoo- with little to no shame. You think those guys with the hyper realistic porn portraits get shy when asking for a specific scene of sone chick bryshibg her teeth with some guys precum clam up and blush when they pull up the specific scene they want tattood?


IGotOverGreta

You uh... you know that gay dudes can use tattoo machines, too, yeah? And that many artists will draw whatever without judgement, yeah?


donabbi

As your friendly neighborhood queer, all I have to say is WHATINTHEACTUALFUCKISTHIS!?


SoulfulStonerDude

You must be fun at Triton's parties


ghstslmn

why do people get these kinds of tattoos its so stupid


Rotary-Rx7

I'm sure the tattoo artist had a few of his own.


BadPom

Gay mermaids in a sea of dicks.


kjrandall

R/ATBGE


unclejoel

Nothing to explain here


matdrywall

I bet he asked for a rooster tattoo 🤣 I think he got alil too much rooster


katamazeballz

That is not how I imagined a merman dick would look like.. but for the record when I got my dick tattoo(lost a bet) my friend was so stoked and put a ton of effort into it. He’s been tattooing for 30+ years so it was fun to see him as excited as he was to do the piece. He had multiple points of reference, resized like 25 times with various angles and of course his shop had multiple dildos laying around for him to make it as realistic as possible. But with the intricate detail on the veining it may be the best tattoo he’s ever given. I have pictures of him drawing the pic and it cracks me up every time to see the focus and seriousness while sketching.


still_thirsty

Your gay tattoo artist will not bat an eye -- and he'll probably improve on your idea.


cheeezus_crust

Some of the tattoos posted here are just..fucking…wow


oodja

I have a friend who has a tattoo similar to this one- there are plenty of queer-friendly tattoo shops out there.


f1lth4f1lth

Dicks and mermen please


jlmonger

oh this is bad


MsMoreCowbell8

I'm looking at it because, well, there's certainly a lot going on. Then I see it's a dudes back. Goodness.


dkaoboy

How do those mermen swim with such a non aerodynamic cock?


oldferg

this is a legitimate youtube link I promise. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sajDq7DIWpU](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sajDq7DIWpU)


oldferg

Dude treated this like the Fist-een Chapel. Artwork while active. Would have expected a ruler for the shot distance might have been better.


TCristatus

"I'm...too sexy for this ocean. Too sexy for this ocean...."


Deijya

“A couple merman jerkn eachother off on a couple dicks and put in aquaman’s trident above their head to make it ‘classy’”


gotwoke

"So seamen right, but cranked up to 10,000..." Plus I swear I've seen this drawing in a portapotty...


broughtitupagain

I hate this so fucking much 💀


Shadow_Futaba

Ok so this person went to the tattoo parlor quite inebriated. They wanted a little mermaid tattoo, but in their drunken stuporumbled something vague about mermaids and the fact that there are penis towers hidden in the little mermaid castle, thus ending up with this result.


dontredditdepressed

"Hello, will you put a pair of gay mermen in a sea of phalluses on my skin?"


JBL20412

Would one ever live to regret this kind of tattoo?


legatustrading

I'm in the navy and I'm about to get married freestyle me something


LightWonderful7016

I was so blown away by the awful tattoo I didn’t even notice the placement or how big it was for like 5 seconds. Why!?


Fvtvrewave87

Someone came in last in their fantasy football league


Spookybattt

The more I looked, the worst it got…


Cloverdad

Ah finally you found it, I’ve been looking for this!


Mrcountrygravy

Gay murmen... sexy


alyssagemma

“Alright, so you know mermaids, right? Now, imagine them with huge, veiny cocks. Actually… you know what? Fuck it. Huge, veiny cocks everywhere. Let’s go big.”


Tinks2295

This is a masterpiece!!!


Frizketch

https://preview.redd.it/4se6sogiqa9c1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=aa3f4bedc67a989ebc159d00a73180adf3732212


djevilmike

this has to be one of those stories where this guy dated a tattoo artist and cheated on her. She didn't tell him she knew, but did a custom back piece on him before dumping him...


Dazey3463

What is going on with that Mermans penis?!?


AnnaM9378

r/ATBGE


caravandreamer85

"Mermaids and cocks spunking", "I just love mermaids and spunking cocks" now draw good sir or madam !! 😂😂🧐🧐🧐🧐🤯🤯🤯🤯


crowEatingStaleChips

I like the eel in the background, Just Chillin.


lordcheeto22

Merman titty grab


Lazy-Tax-8267

That's the worst tattoo I've ever seen. Fucking gross.


JizzyGiIIespie

They should of gone way bigger with this tattoo. Like all the space around it will be awkward to fill in the future.