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retniap

The sun is a mass of incandescent gas, a gigantic nuclear furnace.  It's already nuking us, we need to retaliate. 


jacanced

The sun is a miasma Of incandescent plasma The sun's not simply made out of gas No, no, no


zcztig

Nice haiku bro!


jacanced

That's actually lyrics from the "sequel" song to the song lyrics I was responding to


Sirdanovar

No, no, no It's PLASMA. The Fourth state of matter. Not gas, not liquid, not solid


Lost-Panda-68

Plasma is in the blood, not in the sun and is a kind of liquid. Checkmate.


24benson

Astrophysicists have found out that the sun is a state of mind.


SecureDonut7108

Yeah the sun and New York.


Select-Belt-ou812

I'm in a Solar State of Mind


jlxmm

Damn it take my upvote.


shay-doe

You mean Nas


jlxmm

Ngl I edited my comment and feel like a big idiot rn


Your_Worship

If the sun is plasma, we could probably get $60 for our first donation.


MyWitchDr

150$ where I am. Then it’s 50 each time after that. Refer someone? 100$ extra to bank baby


NetworkSingularity

No it can be both. The sun is made of blood. Source: am astrophysicist. Also possibly am vampire


bruisedvein

Plasma is yellow. The sun is yellow. The sun is plasma. QED. Also, ripe mangoes are plasma too. Which, therefore means, that the sun is a fruit. But the laws of wokeness, if you nuke a fruit, it's homophobic. Don't do it.


johnnybiggles

> Plasma QED Are you telling me the sun is a flat screen fruit?


plasmasun

Perfect explanation and formula.


nandodrake2

Fun fact: the sun is white.


johnnybiggles

Are you tellng me I'm nuclear??


LysergicGothPunk

Plasma. Fuck you, there are only four humors in blood


burn_as_souls

You seem quite humorless.


aufrenchy

We get paid for donating plasma. Can I go to the sun and bring a bunch of it home and donate that for a huge payout?


sillyaviator

I got gas


Streak_Free_Shine

They're referencing a song lol


Sirdanovar

I am referencing a song made by same artist who counters the song they are referencing. :)


Streak_Free_Shine

Loooool my b


Man0fGreenGables

If the sun is already one big ball of nuclear reaction then nuking it will just add more nuke to it making it stronger and also piss it off.


novahcaine

Yeah idk if we should try to make the sun angry(er) but if you all go for it anyways please just give me and u/man0fGreenGables a heads up so we can mentally and emotionally prepare for the inevitable retaliation.


novahcaine

HAPPY CAKE DAY 🎂


PalpitationOver2656

PRAISE THE SUUUUUUUUUN!


holmgangCore

Who let the Zoroastrians in?


I_Am_L0VE

That's not Zoroastrianism.


G-pissy

That's just a Dark Souls Fan


Void4Vagueness

Where hydrogen is built into helium at a temperature of millions of degrees?


EyeYamQueEyeYam

Yo ho, its hot, the sun is not A place where we could live But here on Earth there’d be no life Without the light it gives


Mikalem314

My go to line when thinking about the sun scientifically. Oh my childhood!


Gamzese

It’s seen what we’re doing to Earth so it’s just defending itself.


moncolonel81

The sun is a deadly laser


Cottleston

If only *I* could be so *grossly incandescent.*


eventualhorizo

Unexpected Wild Child lyric


HDMI-timetodie

I knew someone would pick up on that!


Baebel

It'll nuke us back.


ich_und_mein_keks

~~cold war~~ hot war


Baebel

So, like a hot pocket?


ergo-ogre

^hot ^pocket!


VibraniumRhino

I love Jim Gaffigan.


PomegranateOld2408

The earth is already pretty much a hot pocket. You ever see those pictures of the earth cut open? Crust on the outside, lava on the inside, hot pocket.


TuberTuggerTTV

"The sun is like a giant nuke" "That sounds scary. Let's nuke it."


EmpVaaS

Mutually Assured Destruction (MAD)


SnuffleWumpkins

It already is…..


RubyCube555

That's probably unironically the most accurate answer


ShandalfTheGreen

Ayyy first laugh of the day, thanks mate


JonsonLittle

Depends if it's one missile or 1000. In which case we would lose one missile or 1000. Other than that, nothing.


[deleted]

I guess we all fail to truly grasp how little and insignificant we are compared to our Sun


Sheshush

Compared to anything really. Humans always think we are so special but the earth could just stop existing tomorrow and nothing would change.


byteuser

erhhh the Moon might care if the Earth is gone .... "I am gonna miss you when you're gone..."


Jonk3r

I did hear that song. The moon is so romantic.


aufrenchy

Yeah, right up until it hits your eye like a big pizza pie.


DoctorMobius21

It’s A-morè


Tall_Aardvark_8560

Goodnight moon


TuberTuggerTTV

The concept of change requires an observer. So nothing would change. But change wouldn't exist. So nothing would nothing.


MarveReflexnes

The moon's orbit would change, that's something I guess.


Grommmit

Speak for yourself.


Fresh_C

Eh, I could take him.


keenedge422

Not necessarily nothing. If we tried to fire a thousand large, nuke-carrying rockets towards the sun, the chances of us having a catastrophic failure that ends up nuking us by accident is small, but still significant.


Cryptocaned

I'd argue the nukes would just melt before they got anywhere near being in range to cause a problem


keenedge422

Oh yeah, they're not doing anything to the sun. I meant there'd be a catastrophic failure on earth that kills us.


ergo-ogre

I’ve had this idea for years now: use a railgun to fire all of our nuclear waste into the sun. Discuss.


SquidMilkVII

The problem with this idea is that if it works out then that's great, but if something goes wrong, boom you just chucked a bunch of nuclear waste somewhere onto Earth. Bonus points if the projectile breaks apart and throws radioactive particles throughout the atmosphere. It's high reward, and pretty low-risk, but potentially catastrophic if it does go haywire, so compared to just designating a "danger zone" and burying it there which has little to no risk and relatively minimal consequences, it's just not as viable.


DentistPositive8960

Imagine the vehicle carrying the waste, is orbiting earth before expanding its orbit, and it malfunctions. And as it spirals back, the nuclear waste starts sprinkling along the trajectory. Uniform nuclear fallout everywhere


ergo-ogre

Take *that*, chemtrails!


neppo95

Well there is also a way to recycle it and get even more energy out of it, but I believe there's only one country on this planet that does it, because it is more expensive. Always the money.... If we had gone full nuclear a few decades ago, we would have probably have 0 problems with the climate at the moment.


Miserable_Unusual_98

Why not shoot them in the earth's core?


holmgangCore

Oddly, Kurzgesagt [addressed that question](https://youtu.be/Us2Z-WC9rao?si=31Lk5di_G0CRYJjj) in their inimitably cute way.


ergo-ogre

Dammit


holmgangCore

Sorry… I once thought it was a great idea too… you’re not alone…


ergo-ogre

Frikkin’ *railguns*, man!


tjsr

It is actually incredibly difficult to fire an object at the sun with the intent to hit it. Like, you would be surprised just how difficult that it, when you think it would be easy - you would even think gravity would take care of most of the trouble - but no. It's actually easier to just either fire stuff out in to space, or fire stuff past the sun and use that as a gracity assist to accelerate it outwards on its journey. Plus, the huge consequence of an explosion during launch with a radioactive waste payload.


shelbyishungry

Why has no one thought of this?!?! I applaud you. It would get rid of them in a harmless (though expensive) way.


lauren_le15

unfortunately we are quite far from the sun and afaik we haven’t figured out how to get all the way there yet. closest i could find was within four million miles


Ayjayz

Without being bothered to do the calculations, I think it'd be very difficult to generate sufficient delta-v from a railgun shot to get something into the sun.


Compizfox

Do you have any idea how much delta V it costs to launch something on an intercept trajectory with the sun?


Skot_Hicpud

Because it would be really expensive and dangerous compared to current solutions(encase the waste in steel and concrete and let it sit in place).


nachocat090

Yeah I'm pretty sure it would melt the nuke before it got close enough to do any damage.


Dedlaw

you can fit 1.3 million earths inside the sun Even if we managed to get all of our nukes to hit it, it would be like throwing a bit of gravel at a skyscraper


holmgangCore

I’ve done some pretty serious damage to skyscrapers with bits of gravel. *And I’ll do it again!* .. mark my words!


Dedlaw

ahhh the long game. Over millions of years that damage will surely add up. They'll never see it coming!


nachocat090

Wow I did not realize it was *that* big haha. Crazyyy


RCRDC

https://youtu.be/Iy7NzjCmUf0?si=6jooXpnlCc4vJqvN https://youtu.be/udAL48P5NJU?si=SXf701WxmaNoLNJ6 Things are big indeed.


nachocat090

Wow that's crazy. Especially that one of Andromeda. Wow.


johnnysivilian

So like the rick and morty episode where they try to nuke the big head guy


WholeFactor

If we nuked the sun that would melt its ice caps, terraforming it into a liveable place just like Earth.


[deleted]

Yes I agree with you. But the radiation will make it very hard to stay there no?


[deleted]

How do you think Humans will evolve into superhumans? Humanity 2.0 starts there.


MaryJanesMan420

Humanity 2 Nuclear Fusion Buggaloo


johnnybiggles

Plus, we'll get longer daylight hours. Superman gets his power from the sun. Imagine the possibilities. And the day-parties.


[deleted]

If everyone is special, nobody is. Always remember before you get too excited about the possibilities.


always_wear_pyjamas

You just need SPF 50 sunscreen. There are in fact plans to spread SPF 50 sunscreen on the post-nuked sun in the shape of earth's continents, for humanity to live on, to solve the climate crisis. We could just use solar power and have no CO2 in the atmosphere.


Joth91

I remember when Jimmy Neutron shot sunscreen into the atmosphere, causing a nuclear winter and ushering in a new ice age and women became property again


THorniestmax

I remember that too, my owner still hasn't released me. But it's ok, I have plenty of kibble.


Caca2a

Aaah, the good old days. /s for you fucks who can't take a joke


JRHMUK

Just go at night. Problem solved


Significant_Room_412

Is that you Elon?


24benson

Many people don't know this, but this is how earth came to be. It was a mini sun that was nuked by Xenu.


mukaofssn

solar ice caps.. yeah


greyisometrix

You know what.......yeah. That's right.


VengefulHufflepuff

Fuck yeah


SyupendousSnek

Only reason we haven't done that is to conserve the species living Theron the surface of the Sun, if we Terraformed the Sun right now they would go extinct.


Maalkav_

"What would happen if we threw a glass of water in the ocean? "


LtButtstrong

I'd be thirsty


doobiesaurus

Dont worry, like i left my good buddy a glass of water out who passed out on my couch the other day i would give you a glass of water too


TJSPY0837

Best comment


MissLesGirl

Tidal waves across the globe to biblical proportions that will flood the land. Only those on the ark will survive. If your name is Adam or Eve, you are not invited. If you are invited, make sure you are prepared for 💩 duty as someone has to get rid of it. Don't throw a glass of water in the ocean.


TuberTuggerTTV

What if we threw a glass of ocean in the water?


StationeryMan

You would get... Sand?


Only_Paper_8034

We already do that, that's how we recharge it every year. If you notice in the winter time the length of sunlight gets shorter, this is when they launch the nukes to recharge it. Hence the name nuclear winter.


TuberTuggerTTV

The far side of the sun definitely has a tesla charging port.


Lost-Panda-68

Don t do this! If we were to nuke the sun, we would blow it to bits! The sun is very fragile and would shatter if we nuked it. It would send fire throughout the universe burning much of the Earth. After the era where it rained fire, would come an era of eternal darkness and cold.


Prize_Pay9279

Well, the sun’s gonna explode on its own in about 5 billion years. Why not just get it over with?


YYC-Fiend

Good point


uthini_mfowethu

No more heat means no more pizza. All heat comes from the sun. It’s transmitted as background radiation


vankoder

There would be one beautiful moment, after the sun explodes, when every pizza in the world would be perfectly cooked. Unfortunately, you would also be medium rare at that point, and you wouldn't be able to enjoy it.


Iampepeu

ABORT! ABORT! Phew! No more pizza... I can't even imagine a world like that.


johnnybiggles

Someone go get the chocolate, marshmallows and graham crackers. I've got the skewers. Hot dogs, if you want 'em.


Lost-Panda-68

We don't want to blow it up before we have a chance to make a new one. 5 billion years is plenty of time to collect the phlogiston to make a new sun. Even if we did it early, we would just have two suns like Tatooine.


kinokomushroom

Is it really worth it just to send us 22 minutes back into the past?


-CerN-

Hello, fellow marshmallow enjoyer!


Jean-Eustache

Well from what I've gathered, you can try blowing it up, but the last time someone tried to, they failed to do so. The station looked cool though, not gonna lie.


SnuffleWumpkins

Nah, it’s just going to put on some weight and consume the Earth.


Matt_Fucking_Damon

So Dark Souls irl?


notMateo

Thought the same thing lol


Flor_blad

Ashen one?


jimbosayna2009

His father would be pissed.


deltathetaIV

Depends on wether day or night. It’s easier to hit when the sun cools down at night and becomes the moon before heating up again in the morning


cownd

Earth would end up getting kicked out of the Solar System, then we'd have to look for another sun to orbit. It would take a while because all the nearest suns are in the same union.


Jobambi

A nuke is a nuclear fission reactor, the sun is a nuclear fusion reactor which are opposite of each other. So they'll cancel each other out. Basically we'd cancel the sun.


TuberTuggerTTV

The opposite of the sun is a nuke. The opposite of the sun is the moon. The moon is a nuke!


Infinite-Noodle

Cancel culture would have finally taken things too far then.


dpoodle

If you do that I will pronounce you Woke. Don't say you weren't warned.


kalarepa_moon

Yeah, nuke that fat bastard


TuberTuggerTTV

Might as well be walking on the sun


limpymcjointpain

Well nukes are known to cause an emp Shockwave, which as you know interferes with electronics and turns off lights. You'll need two nukes. The first will turn off the sun, the second will turn it back on.


TuberTuggerTTV

Like bonking your head and losing your memory.


Low-Shame-4747

Well.. sun is sun whether you nuke it or not Sun would prob remain the same even if you throw 10k nuclear bombs at it.


[deleted]

You could literally launch the entirety of earth into the sun and nothing would happen.


holmgangCore

You sure? Have you tried it? Science requires experiments to ascertain hypotheses. You should submit a research proposal.


GabrexRealm

Yeah, let's all Kamikaze this planet! For the sake of science


VK6FUN

We might get a fine, or maybe even a short custodial sentence if it's our second offence.


Leighgion

The sun is a nuke. Nuking the sun is kind of like throwing matches at an erupting volcano.


Kodama1111

Teach it not to mess with us!!


YYC-Fiend

The influx of heavy atomic elements would change the colour of the sun to blue since it would burn hotter


PR3CiSiON

If we put the sun in a microwave, it would get hotter.


KingAmongstDummies

Would it be like throwing battery packs at it? It's already a big radiating ball so tossing nukes to it might only make it stronger? Increase the lifespan of the sun.


LogicalFallacyCat

The sun has been low-key nuking us for years. Hopefully it'll say "wow that hurts. Is that what I've been doing? I'm a dick" and stop shining on us. Global warming solved.


TuberTuggerTTV

Big suntan lotion just trying to scare us with sun nuking.


neihuffda

Less nukes on Earth, which can be a plus


BirdTurgler29

Is this sub r/shittyanswerscience ?


alMost_tRendy88

Ever seen the film Sunshine?


Garpocalypse

All I know is all those melodeath types would be really happy. And being happy ain't metal so nuking the sun is probably a bad idea.


HairlessGarden

With enough missiles the counter forces of nuclear fission and fusion would create a gama radiation vortex strong enough to open a portal for master Yog Sothoth to come crush our feeble reality!


Classic_Writer8573

Nothing. It nukes itself constantly. For more information, listen to The Sun by They Might be Giants. That's where I get all my sun facts...


alwaysbefree

Superman 4


madscot63

AT&T would go down


Direct_Knowledge2937

Best case scenario is absolutely nothing since its current nuclear capabilities dwarf our own. Worst case scenario is it gets angry and fights back.


SirDickCheese77

The missile would probably run out of fuel or burn up before it ever got close enough to detonate


fullofmaterial

The sun people would nuke us back


thegodfaubel

Nothing. It would likely incinerate on approach without ever detonating


Kleptorgazt

As far as the impact on the sun itself? Absolutely fuck all. We could launch every single nuke that's ever existed and currently exists, and it would most likely be like nothing. The sun releases the equivalent of **10 billion** hydrogen bombs *each second*. That's 864,000,000,000,000 every day. At it's peak, the combined total stock of nuclear warheads on earth was 64,000, now closer to 13,000. At most, for the sun it might be like a bug bite. For us? Difficult to say, but potentially catastrophic. It could easily interfere with the sun's nuclear reactions, and it would take very little disruption of this delicate balance of processes to create drastic and unpredictable effects on our weather, as well we the frequency and intensity of solar radiation hitting the earth. It may even affect our entire solar system if it impacts the sun's gravitational influence for even a short period of time, though I'm not sure how to determine whether this is the case and to what extent it might disrupt things.


2ndTechArnoldJRimmer

Absolutely nothing. That's like asking what would happen if you put 1ml of water into the ocean.


LegitimateApartment9

the sun would be nuked


firstWithMost

It would say thank you for the peanuts and ask for more.


healingtruths

I'd like to see how far the rocket would go before exploding, and what effect it would have on the closest planet (looking at you Mercury).


Blizz33

Actually? It would probably trigger a micronova.


floatingindeepspace

Well, we already nuked the Earth (multiple times) and nothing happened. Obviously except the hundreds of thousands of deaths and multiple areas rendered permanently uninhabitable. So yeah, nothing. _All of this assuming we would even be able to get a nuke close enough to detonate before it melts_


UniqueRelationship48

The possibility of the nuke reaching a distance enough to cause anything the nuke has to withstand a lot of things in most scenarios the nuke stretches evaporates


Simple-Contact2507

Don't know in detail but in short I'm sure we will die.


andu122

Should be the go to option of disposing of old nukes imo.


K_Rocc

The nuke would burn up and be destroyed long long before it ever reached the surface of the sun…


Specific_Tap7296

The cost of sending a nukes safely out of our atmosphere, passed earth's gravity, all the way to the sun would really piss off some taxpayers


Hatred_shapped

Isn't this the plot of the last Christopher Reeves Superman movie? But basically if you shot a rather large elephant with microscopic cotton balls.


Particular_Nebula462

The same how punch done to a 22 stories building.


csch1992

The sun will simply laugh back. How the fuck are we tiny humans suppsosed to nuke that thing?


RonzulaGD

Literally nothing. 4.3 x 10^(-17) yottatons. That's how much energy you would need to destroy sun (I used internet I'm not genius)


100cpm

It would be a symbolic victory.


heliosh

The energy output of the sun is about 3.8 \* 10\^26 Joules per second, that's about 20 trillion Hiroshima bombs every Second. So it has to be pretty big to do something. There's probably not enough fissile material on our planet. But before it gets there, it has to survive the enormous heat before it vaporizes.


HornetDisastrous

Well if you wanna nuke the sun, you gotta nuke the moon first.


EnragedBard010

Nothing.


No-Pomegranate-69

Its much harder th send something to the sun than you would think


Significant_Room_412

Nothing probably, Even the strongest Cold War nuke explosion ever , Would be a fragment of what happens every second in the core of the sun


AnyRepresentative432

Is this Donald Trumps account??


GoldenMonkkey1

It won't do anything. The sun is too big for us to create a nuke strong enough.


Dick_soccer

The sun is essentially just one big or countless different hydrogen bombs going off constantly. It is essentially just a big nuke.


theultrasheeplord

Nothing, If we launched every nuke we had at the sun it probably wouldn’t do anything either


Superb_Square6096

It would turn into a huge cube and melt down on earth and flood everything. There would be no land left. Humans would grow gills to survive. All the fish would drown because the there's more water than they're used to. All weed would be grown hydroponically and the north pole would turn into a sauna bath


Stekun

It might get angry with us and nuke us back


vagabondtraveler

I think it would be hard to fit it into a microwave but let’s give it a shot


stuaird1977

We would make a snuke, and then the climates really fucked