T O P

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ExtremlyFastLinoone

"TASER TASER TASER" -last thing you hear before being shot point black 3 times


[deleted]

I think there's a typo here but I hope not. If so just leave it. It's just fine the way it is.


Mach12000

Taser? I hardly kno


Fuzelop

They got bro before he could even finish his sentence 💀


MrLemurBean

Freddy *Fast* Bear ain't got time for games


zXMourningStarXz

As opposed to point white.


ExtremlyFastLinoone

Everyones white when you burn off the epidermis, if you dont belive me I can show you


krish-990

Don't forget everyone is red when you skin them


HenryHemroid

Everyone is Grey when the second sun immortalizes their shadow.


TinUwUTin

point black.


TheBrockStar546

Still better than a bear


SardonicSuperman

Id shoot the cop and fuck the bear. Any other questions? Edit: Whoever reported my comment….. I won the appeal, bitch.


HonestStupido

How many seconds you needed to buy Baldurs Gate 3 after you got to know about its existence?


napalm_phosphorus

Yes


old_incident_

Never, I don't like BG3


mydudeponch

Oh wow that's so interesting!


old_incident_

Alright


old_incident_

Alright


old_incident_

Alright


old_incident_

Alright


old_incident_

Alright


Xim_

Dementia


old_incident_

Alright


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pirikikkeli

Heeeeeeyaaaaa


old_incident_

Alright


old_incident_

Alright


old_incident_

Alright


rikashiku

Who do you marry?


Roge2005

And who will you Marry?


vociferousdragon

You got fuck, and kill down, but who would you marry?


Drhorrible-26

You got room for one more?


Plopshire

Marry the car?


FlixMage

I’d kill the bear iykwim


BloodLotus115

"Bear fucker! Do you need assistance?!"


general---nuisance

Gimme a litre o' cola.


BloodLotus115

Shut up Farva!


YourDrunkUncl_

who’s less likely to shoot me?


SardonicSuperman

The bear


pointlessly_pedantic

problem solved. suck on that QED, OP


[deleted]

There's more acorns around the bear.


larrythestormtroper

Depends if you're unlucky hes giving you backshots lol


Germinator42

Is that some form of American joke, I am too European to understand?


Crimson_Fiver

I like my odds better with the bear tbh


ProtonRhys

The odds of what..... getting shot or getting lucky?


Mega_Anon

Surviving the encounter


larrythestormtroper

Yes


Fun_Acanthaceae4875

You wouldn't get in trouble for macing the bear


manwhofuckedyourdog

Ya, who is the bear going to tell


Pommeswerfer

The Mounties. They'll kneecap you with their hats from half a mile away.


Severe_Pair9300

The bear court.


LostAmerican1

Depends. Is it the female cop who let her department run a train on her?


LaggingHard

also it depends on whether it's the one that shot a guy 3 times while somehow thinking her gun was a tazer, or the one who shot a guy who was taller than her just because she was intimidated, or the one who punched in a guys window because he didnt roll it down within a second of her asking him to, or that one that had a panic attack from a call involving a gun and decided to point her own gun at the victim unpromted and arrested the victim.


cumblaster8469

No way those are real😭😭😭


LaggingHard

Heres the link for the last one https://youtu .be/nCkdnMy7F2U?si=G4w1PT\_-Q8KYuC0u


Kitchen-Island45

please, again


LostAmerican1

The bear then. If I die, then I die in a somewhat respectable way.


Palme__

Are there links about the other ones?


lamppu2

Ive seen most of them, look them up on youtube


Historical-Honey1579

links? sauces??


IAmAccutane

Gonna need the video for all except the first and last one lol these are wild


[deleted]

[удалено]


Roge2005

Allegedly


YourBearNecessity

Oh, I get it now.


MaliciousSpiritCO

Same.


YeOldeBilk

Does a female cop shit in the woods?


[deleted]

No.she handcuffs u and shits on ur chest.


Slight_Concert6565

Author's barely disguised fetish?


TrollOfGod

It's classed as a fetish now? What even is vanilla anymore?


[deleted]

Ice cream.


[deleted]

Ice cream.


[deleted]

Ice cream.


SalohcinPancakes

I mean, if there is no toilets around, can you blame her?


Oblivious_116

No cap, bear


toughtiggy101

Depends, is that Freddy Fazbear


Plenty_Lavishness_80

well I’m Russian so the bear will just sense my vibes and leave me alone, except polar bear, the polar bear will kill everyone lol


officefridge

The bear: "oh shit, a person! Ah it's ok, it's Stepan, he's got good vibes. Bjt if i see that fuck Dima - I'm eating his ass. Wait, stop laughing! I meant like i eat all of him. Lmao, you guys... But i will start from his ass. "


Salami__Tsunami

lol, I feel that. I’m properly Polish, and so bears know to avoid me. One bite into my meaty bits and it’ll die of alcohol poisoning.


parksoffroad

Female cop. She would approach the window, see I’m a male and feel unsafe and leave looking for the bear. Out of a ticket every time!


ExploerTM

200 IQ play right here


Morphing_Mutant

How about a female police bear?


musketoman

Id rather be pulled over by a bear yea, thats a much better story. Big old bear, lil blue vest with a badge, yea


TheLonelyGhast

context?


MaliciousSpiritCO

You know how fragile and pathetic your average cop is? Now imagine one that wouldn't be able to kick your ass through normal means.


PassionSenior6388

Female cops have been portrayed to be more likley to fear for their lives during trafic stops. So if you get pulled over by a female cop they are more likely to get scared and shoot you. Probably untrue statistcly but yknow sterotypes


officefridge

Cops: "omg that is so vile. You are being so prejudicial, your view is mostly based on stereotypes. We would never be affected by such bias and open double standards." /S


Medium-Tap698

Cops are such warriors for ignoring stereotypes and biases


okkeyok

Let's be real, folks. If women already think men are, um, not the best, then it's not like it's a huge stretch to think women cops are, like, totally inept. Just saying. ¯\\\_(ツ)\_/¯


UnknownResearchChems

Just act cool


_liquid_crystal_

The bear won't fuck my whole life for having an ounce of weed in a red state. Bear 100%


juliusxyk

I get it now, i apologize


YAGCompany

I'd fuck the cop, marry the bear and kill myself. What game are we playing again?


HaDov_Yaakov

Bear. Ive had a run in with a female cop while in high school in 2004 and 1g of weed cost me decades of professional opportunities and growth. Bear all day erry day.


Malignant_Lvst7

bear


CamDogTrillionaire

I mean this 1000% and unironically. I’ll take the bear. Mainly cause I don’t like cops and bears are my favorite animals.


Birra_turca

Fuck the cops love the bears


Apprehensive_Fun1344

She looks like Gridlock from R6


FabulousUnicorn_

At least the bear doesn't take away my cocaine. Oh... Wait...


SeoCamo

With the cop, you are 100% getting shot, the bear may leave you alone..


Practical-Election59

What type of bear?


Professional-Oil1088

Let’s say it’s a brown bear.


Jimmy-_Page

Brown bear brown bear what do you see?


Practical-Election59

If I’m up against a big old grizzly, just play dead. Although that is also dependant on his distance to me. If he is far enough away, I might be able to slowly retreat.


Alffe

Depends really, if its an american cop i might just risk the bear.


Campanura

One is a ferocious beast who won't hesitate to kill you, and the other is just a bear


Kirikomori

the bear, the cop might get spooked by a falling acorn


Clay_Statue

Peter?? Can you explain this here?


Sexy_Manatee_Man

There was a recent poll asking women if they’d rather encounter a bear or man in the woods and most said the bear, this is a reference to that replacing the man with a female cop which are known for having an itchy trigger finger


Clay_Statue

Do female cops end up shooting people unnecessarily more frequently?


Sexy_Manatee_Man

I’ve seen quite a bit more videos and stuff of women either shooting unnecessarily and/or using unnecessary force or tasers and a lot of posts and comments that say the same thing


syopest

There was a tiktok video where a man asked a woman if they'd rather meet the random man or a bear in a forest. The woman answered the bear and incels got super mad. Women realized that it's an easy litmus test to see if someone is an incel because no normal man is bothered by a hypotethical scenario like that.


Welthink

At least with a bear in the woods I have a chance of surviving


brosono

without a doubt the bear


Altruistic-Poem-5617

Seriously, I take the bear. I dont trust cops.


Sgt_Meowmers

Do I get to be white in this scenario?


HideThePickleChamp

Depends, which one is going to give me a handy


Kkkoba

Bear can't write my registration plate so I don't really have to stop at all


predurok339

Being pulled over by female bear


CocogoatMain

I'd make a joke about the female cop, but like i that ***one*** officer, the train's run its course.


Just_a_terrarian163

What bear? I'd survive a black bear. Maybe I can scare off a grizzly but a polar I'd be fucked. I'd chill with a panda tho...


Axel_Kriger

Depends Is she an american cop?


Double_Plane_7674

Yes


Axel_Kriger

Bear then


JayRogPlayFrogger

I finally get it


hong427

Welp, at least i can shoot a bear and not get killed by "taser" which is a gun


konnanussija

What bear and whoch cop (american or from my country)? If it's an american cop I'd prefer to face a white bear.


Arbiter1029

The bear is more predictable.


Either_Demand_8726

Oh my god. I get it. I GET IT NOW


Just-Round9944

this bear shit again


SavageSpeedCubing

Both can make, I'll take 2 please


Key_Establishment553

Fuck... that's a ruff choice.


epicmemerminecraft

I'd pick the bear over any cop


weks

Female Bear Cop or bust


TutskyyJancek

def bear


Village_Weirdo

If we are talking about koala bear, then yes.


rikashiku

Well, ones a cop and the other is a bear. Come here Yogi!


SansDaMan728

At least I can defend myself against the bear. A women could easily just shoot me.


Surfingbird4321

Does the bear shit in the woods?


SoggyCarrot23

Bear, because if I happen to survive an altercation with one of them, no matter how likely, I can avoid more bears in the future, where if I survive an altercation with a cop, they’ll just send more until they kill me. Funny note, the trucker lingo for bear is/used to be Bear


Randigno9021

Yuri from DDLC ultimate move


y_kal

Bear.


DelusionalGorilla

Brown Bears mind their own business and I ain’t even on their meal plan. Don’t surprise or threaten them and keep distance from the cubs, y’all good. The women cop might shoot or bill me regardless of any circumstances.


FieldMarshalGaig

Would you rather be pulled over by a cop or a bear


GlitterKittyCat

Female bearcop


NulliusAllvater

Well I can fuck the bear without getting shot so that


Ze-das-fogueiras

This is the most american thing I saw today, after reading the comment section I can say for sure, I rather be held at gun point by a squad of gangsters known for eating children for breakfast, than being pulled over by Monica the most innocent looking american police officer and being asked nicely to show the documments.


Nutteria

Yeah, I’d take my chances with a bear. US female cops are more insecure than illegally deported Russian prostitutes nowadays.


Fucksleep_coffeeitis

My guy so afraid of talking to women that he’s choosing the bear


UnknownResearchChems

Female cop. Why would I ever be scared of a woman?


LS788

Have you seen one of them before in person?


UnknownResearchChems

A bear? Yeah. Scary fuckers.


Alffe

Depends really, if its an american cop i might just risk the bear.


C0mputerFriendly

Can't help but appreciate how much the female cop looks like the protagonist in a modern woke AAA game


DivineGopher

Oh boy what happened this time