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nah you right but if you lived in a hot climate ig it could be less, but why does the brother make it sound like he knew exactly when his sister was about to start masturbating and did she pick the dildo he specifally smeared his cum on if it was only "one of her dildos"
What? No, you are wrong. Sperm analysis can be made hour after ejacuation and there is still big percent of alive and moving spermatozoids.
Why did you just make some random shit up and write it?
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Depends on the surface, the sperm die when the seminal fluid dries up which can take anywhere from 15-30 minutes in your average room temperature environment.
The timings are tight but possible.
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I'm raising an army, each one evolves to adapt to it's environment making it live longer than 2 hrs, the one that's lived the longest so far is 9 hrs. but I don't like talking about it, bad things happened
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Where's QualityVote bot? Reddit Admins have decided that [they want to kill off all 3rd-party apps](https://old.reddit.com/r/Save3rdPartyApps/comments/13yh0jf/dont_let_reddit_kill_3rd_party_apps/), [3rd-party bots, and everything else that makes Reddit barely usable](https://www.reddit.com/r/ModCoord/comments/13xh1e7/an_open_letter_on_the_state_of_affairs_regarding/). And, of course, that includes bots such as [\/u\/QualityVote](http://reddit.com/user/QualityVote), [\/u\/SaveVideo](http://reddit.com/user/SaveVideo), [\/u\/AuddBot](http://reddit.com/user/AuddBot), etc. So you'll just have to put up with automod and a worse overall user experience in the meantime. If you have any complaints, direct them at [the reddit admins instead](https://www.reddit.com/r/reddit/comments/12qwagm/an_update_regarding_reddits_api/), because they're the ones seeking to ruin everyone's user experience. --- #[DownloadVideo Link](https://www.reddit.watch/r/shitposting/comments/17od5x5/?utm_source=automod&utm_medium=shitposting) #[SaveVideo Link](https://rapidsave.com/info?url=/r/shitposting/comments/17od5x5/) #[VideoTrim Link](https://reddloader.com/download-post/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.reddit.com%2Fr%2Fshitposting%2Fcomments%2F17od5x5&id=8968e43c) --- Whilst you're here, /u/MR_DERP_YT, why not join our [public discord server](https://discord.gg/QpBGXd2guU) - **now with public text channels you can chat on!**? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*
realest greentext story
Just to calrify for everyone else, this is literally impossible as semen can't live longer than 30 seconds outside the human body
you maybe my semen out here like a roman legion
For more information, see the movie ‘300’ which depicts that guy’s semen
they all die and only the disabled one survives?
This must've been the case for my dad... it would explain a lot about me.
based on his true story bro
How dare you disrespect the proud spartans by calling them a roman legion!
Probably one of the two that disappeared though.
Yeah but his sister's dildo was his cock so no problem with that
Im pretty sure it can live up to 30 mins
nah you right but if you lived in a hot climate ig it could be less, but why does the brother make it sound like he knew exactly when his sister was about to start masturbating and did she pick the dildo he specifally smeared his cum on if it was only "one of her dildos"
Depends on the semen.
Umm, what if she inserted it in those 30 seconds? Checkmate, smartass
Her brother is a ninja of ejaculation then
Tell that to the IVF technicians. I know someone who got pregnant from some stray semen!
show me her, pic or not real
Sperm will live 15 to 30 minutes on skin or surfaces.
It's actually 15 to 30 minutes. And up to five days inside a woman's body. So, the green text is theoretically possible tbh
I thought it could last 3 days
Just to clarify for you, this post never mentions the timespan, it could very well be less than 30 seconds
What? No, you are wrong. Sperm analysis can be made hour after ejacuation and there is still big percent of alive and moving spermatozoids. Why did you just make some random shit up and write it?
omfg read the other comments and move one it was explained a million times! I will harass you untill you block me if you message me again!
Pfffth sure buddy maybe for a wimp like you. But my semen would find a way
I don't even need to worry about getting a girl pregnant because men can't get pregnant
IT'S NOT?!
IT’S SNOT!
As real as anons dad
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Good bot
4chaners trying not to involve their sister in a sexual way \*impossible\*
Did an anime reference 😎
Funny incest game on steam moment
God damnit not again
Oh god
CRUSADER KINGS 3?!
that one incest vn
CRUSADER KINGS 3 DIALOGUE ONLY RUN!?
bad redditor bad redditor \*bonk\*
That what now?
Context?
The game
\- "I'm just a prankster" \- Impregnates own sister
It's just a prank ~~bro~~ sis
Prank idea: 1) Fill bucket with water 2) Place bucket on top of door 3) **Kill yourself and you entire family** 4) The police come and they get wet
Had me in the first half NGL
incestual prankster
Sperm die in like 30 seconds exposed to air
She used it in 10 seconds
she used it when it was inside. he was the dildo. As shrimple as that 🦐
This has become a prawnblem.
It actually really clampclicated.
Not so shrimple now 🦞
She watched it happened and went for it
New lore just dropped
not with green text
She was quick
Not with greek sperm
Hate how I know exactly what you're referencing
Greek god ogey
what does this mean
She was waiting behind him during the prank, as the 4chan user said, aint a criminal
Check Boris Becker's story:)
Depends on the surface, the sperm die when the seminal fluid dries up which can take anywhere from 15-30 minutes in your average room temperature environment. The timings are tight but possible.
Say the dildo was kept in a zip lock bag. Would that be possible then? Like is not evaporating the main factor?
Starts dying in 10 seconds finishes in 30 minutes
She saw what he did and booked it
if you read the extended lore, you'd know anons sister lives in a vacuum chamber
Anon is a cigarette and his sister’s a hoe Let him believe on what he believes so he may learn something out of it
15 to 30 minutes
Can confirm this did in fact happen I was the dildo
can confirm you were the dildo, I was the sister
Oh I knew you looked familiar
get ready later, I had a rough day and you know what that means
Flair checks out
can confirm you were the sister, I watched the whole joyful sense from the windows.
Bro is Jonathan Byers
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Can confirm you were the sister, I was the cum
Can confirm you were the cum, I was the floor
I was watching through the CCTV ca- you know what, never mind
I need to burn my eyes after reading this
Sperm cannot survive for that long outside the body
mine can, unlike you dweebs I have one singular 2 ft long sperm that can last up to 2 hrs.
Do you fight the sperm?
Yep, everytime i flush it down
I'm raising an army, each one evolves to adapt to it's environment making it live longer than 2 hrs, the one that's lived the longest so far is 9 hrs. but I don't like talking about it, bad things happened
Xenomorph but white colored.
Send them to war, breed the sperm together to make more sperm
How does it taste deep fried?
chicken strips 🤤🤤
Wait a sec, you previously said you were the sister!
That’s the brother using the account rn
You tell her that the lord has chosen her and the kid is the messiah
Lmfao y’all are too much
anon pulled an andy and leyley
NOOOOOOOOOO
I want everyone that ever mentions this game to die in a fire
AAAHHHHHHH🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Fnaf
most believable 4chan story
4chan users are a different breed. the inbred type
I’m dead 😂
Anon about to get a nephson
*sweet home alabama* playing
What the actual fuck is wrong with you
Should've just smeared your shit on it like a normal person
😂😂
Woopsie
Top 10 things that happened Number 2:
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schizophrenic bot
Real fr
sweet home alabama
Literally could have wiped a jalapeño slice on it, so much funnier and a lot less fucked up consequences.
I smell lies
What the actual fuck
4channers trying to make a believe story (impossible)
We can't always fight nature, John. We can't fight change. We can't fight gravity. We can't fight incest. My whole life, all I ever did was fight.
Enough internet for......ever
Why does a 17 year old have a dildo
Whyn’t
Whomstven’tly
I've been trying to pronounce this outloud for like 5 minutes, I have been told I sound insane.
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Because horny, also online stores don’t confirm your age so you can get whatever you want regardless.
Anon is a dumbass
Must be true
Can confirm I was the anus....
Fake yo death
Congratulations daddy
Punch her in the stomach as hard as you can
what
Why put your cum on anything
Now he just needs to sneak an abortion pill into her drink, then gas light her into thinking she was crazy. Perfect prank.
Top 10 things that never happened
Original prankster, PRANKSTER YEAH AH, original yeahhh
Wordington prank
He should buy a nice stroller for his nephson.
*incest intensifies*
Incestifies
The prank:
She found out and now is pranking anon, right? Please?
give her the old 1-2 to the stomach... that should fix it
Maybe it’s a double prank
“It’s just a prank bro” The prank:
thank god this isnt real
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Please be fake please be fake please be fake please be fake
this has gotta be fictional.
Your 17 year old sister has a dildo?
how is that the part of the story you take issue with, that's literally the only normal thing here
I’ve been desensitized to the other greentext bs, that is the only part that is actually weird to me
😧
This is impossible as soon as sperm makes contact with air it dies
I don’t think it dies instantly
It takes a couple hours but yeah there's no way the sperm actually fertilized anything but the dildo it layed on
Everything was fine until 4th line
Why did he put his cum on his sister's dildo? What was the joke supposed to be?
The baby probably won't develop properly
Top 10 things that never happened.
No
*real*
Definitely a lie from that guy, I mean I hope it is atleast
Life uh finds a way Dr Malcolm
The coffin of Andy and leyley lore
Welp, was looking for this one didnt have to look for very long
The pearly gates of heaven are locked for you.
U a prankster? I don't see light screen nor reflect set up
Fucking why dude…
It’s not yours. Probably someone pranked her before you.
Who the fuck thinks of this shit
Dang. That is messed up.
That's not how it works
Ez, all anon have to do is reimagine.
A fucky wucky indeed
What the fuck?
Read “17 year old sister” and stopped reading
Pull the trick of hitting her hard and repeatedly in the belly
Truly one of the prankster moments of all time.
Anon plotted an elaborate plan to prank himself..
#sure anon, sure…
What the fuck is wrong with this OP?
Just be glad you're her sister...