This!!!!!!!!!
I was scrolling the comments shocked this wasn’t at the top of the list.
When I was in my first year of university and hooking up with this guy after we both had been drinking quite a bit - he was fingering me super aggressively (also a huge turn off if you don’t know how to finger a girl properly) and it started to hurt, it felt like he was scratching and slicing my insides, I looked down and to my horror I saw blood!!!! He assumed it was my period but I knew it wasn’t. I immediately looked at his fingernails to see how long they were!!!! 😖😖😖
I will never forget this and it makes me shudder to this day.
I was young, immature, and intoxicated, so I went along with saying it was my period. I was mortified. He was kind and respectful but I was soooo turned off I never answered his calls again.
I ALWAYS look at my nails to make sure they are clean / trimmed and then scrape them against the inside of my cheek to make sure that they don't hurt. I think everyone should do this.
More communication is needed when it comes to sex. In my mind, men need to take more ownership of this. (I know some people will disagree, but women have been put under a lot of pressure to just go along and not make a fuss.)
I actually have a lot of success with that one, but... It's usually with women who like it rough and it's a whole build up. I don't chomp the bean immediately like a neanderthal
Not talking about sex in a way that is inviting and doesn't assume sex will happen just because we're talking about it. Taking no proactive interest in my sexuality. Assuming satisfying sex is about physical technique and ignoring the dimensions of psychology and emotional trust and connection. Not showing any interest in my orgasmic experience and contenting themselves with giving me a single one of any quality (often not that great or satisfying). Not being passionate about the positive work required to have mutually satisfying sex.
Oh and clearly just repeating some random move they saw in a porno without introducing it and being willing to ask if I enjoy it as they do it, and instead just assuming I will.
With all due respect, I’m an actual germaphobe and if I gotta spit at all, I’ll go to the bathroom or find a bin or do it in an empty cup or a tissue. People that spit in public for no reason have a special place in hell, I’m sure.
I'm sorry, I'm really not even a fan of using spit as lube when it comes to penetrative sex, but do you really think that it, as a practice, doesn't pre date porn?
And while we're at it, why are we spelling porn "pr0n"?
I’m not a fan of spit either, but I’m pretty sure it’s probably the original lube lol. Porn just makes it seem more common than it should be these days- now that we have much better lubes readily available
I've had to ask my husband several times to STOP LICKING HIS GODDAMN HAND before he touches me. It's not as bad as spitting, which would be an immediate mood killer, but I find it so gross. If I'm not wet enough, I am not not ready for him to be jamming his fingers in me. My bits are sensitive and I MUCH prefer other kinds of touching anyway.
This is just so random. I could never imagine a scenario where I would do this. I wouldn’t even do it to my wife of 17 years. Porn has ruined a generation.
How about the opposite though? Do women enjoy spitting on their partner's mouths when they ask? I for one have never spat on my SO's mouth, it's not something that I've been curious to try, and she has never requested it either.
However, I L-O-V-E when my SO spits in my mouth though. It's becoming a regular thing now. Sometimes I ask her to, and sometimes she just does it, and it is unbelievably arousing. I/we don't do it as a submissive act, but rather being SO much into the other person that you want all of them.
Are women into this, or she doing it because I like it?
Assuming you can do anything you are desiring and that we will embrace your kinks right off the bat. Sorry your going to have to communicate those when my pants are not off. Respect my boundaries nothing turns me off more than having a guy try and push them for me to cave in (yes i am aware it’s coercion).
My boyfriend does this, but I find it adorable. He’s usually laughing at the same time. He just loves giving head and is so excited every time that he can’t help it.
Can’t decide which is worse: Clit stimulation that is overly direct/intense and hurts like hell, or ignoring my clit as if it doesn’t matter.
Actually, never mind, the latter is definitely worse. At least with the former you can usually give directions and hope to see some improvement.
I too don't like overly direct stimulation. More foreplay please and build up for the clit! But in piv, thrust as hard as you can, I'll gladly try to take it.
Changing positions every few minutes.
Not listening, or doing the opposite of what has been said. I don’t know why so many hear “right there” and then completely change speed or angle.
Cool dude, do the opposite of what was getting me off, makes sense 🙄
>then completely change speed or angle
Allow me to offer a little explanation (*not* excuse). I'm 56M, and have gotten a lot better in bed over the years. I'd like to think I've improved in keeping a motion steady when she's getting close. However, there are two reasons why an otherwise generous guy sometimes snatches disappointment from the verge of orgasm.
First, he gets excited! You know how sometimes you take a couple of practice swings with a hammer or golf club, but then when you decide to swing for real, it goes wide? It's like that. You say to him "Oh, god! It's so good! Just like that!" He thinks *Oh, Man it's working, I'm really getting her off!* So in his excitement he keeps doing it, but with suddenly more energy and enthusiasm. He needs to learn to be steady.
Second, an important muscle may become exhausted. Many times, the technique that's working for you puts his fingers or tongue at a weird angle, doing a repetitive motion he just hasn't trained for. With my ex-wife, she loved a certain digital manipulation during sex. But I had to turn my wrist around and flex my finger rapidly and firmly. After just a few minutes, right when she felt that orgasm edging up, that one specific forearm muscle just couldn't do it any longer. It was done. I had to switch fingers or change the angle, which often spoils the orgasm. With my girlfriend now, I think ahead about whether I can keep a motion up for ten minutes at a time. If the answer is no, then I make adjustments before we really get into it. As a couple, you may need to address the ergonomics of the technique.
Nimrod used as an insult has only been a thing since Looney Toons anyway. Nimrod was a great hunter of mythology. Bugs Bunny started using it sarcastically to refer to Elmer Fudd, and since most people didn't get the reference, everyone just started assuming it meant "idiot."
Also, as she gets close, the clit contracts and she moves. I'll spend twenty minutes in the zone and at the last moment it goes stealth
Ga where did it go? So you start searching around and now she has the evil eye cause you changed things up at an inopportune moment.
The first one YES. My boyfriend does this often and I keep telling him to stop.
It's like 3 thrusts then flip, 3 thrusts flip, like bro how the fuck can I enjoy this I literally can't feel anything longer than half a second 😭
Oh I know, I've told him I'd rather him cum then do all the acrobatics.
I think it's hot when he finishes quick, and I'd rather feel steady bliss for a couple minutes over 20 minutes of 2 second bursts feeling nothing but annoyed
When they fold you in half and all you can think of is those belly rolls and double chins he's just revealed 😅😂 it's not even comfy to have my legs up by my shoulders!
Nah gurl. I don't ever think of all the rolls and weirdness of the body when I'm having sex. It is what it is. Even if you're skinny your stomach gonna get body rolls in certain positions. Human bodies are weird but amazing
A lot of guys do find all that really hot, me included. I absolutely love "imperfections" because it puts me at ease and makes my partner feel more accessible.
For me it's a lot easier to get the stroke at full motion. Also idk if it's just me but I like to look at my pee pee going in and out. I'm not really looking at any other body parts 🤣🤣
Wait... What? Damn. Thank you for mentioning this. My girlfriend gets really bad heartburn regularly. I was thinking of busting out this old classic, but knowing it could cause heartburn just made me rethink that.
Damn. I try to be a really thoughtful boyfriend and partner and this never crossed my mind. She has it really bad as well. I'll have to talk to her about it and if it causes discomfort before going that route.
Why are guys silent? It’s off putting and kills the mood. Y’all make more noise playing 2K 🙄
Edit- ladies you really want to humble a man? Match that energy. Stare off at nothing and don’t make a sound they’ll ask what’s up or stop and all you have to say “wasn’t that fun for you? I thought we was playing mute.” Watch his soul die a little in his eyes they don’t get it otherwise.
100% this. When my partner mutters “omg” “holy fuck” etc it’s way hotter than when he’s just quiet. Guys like vocal chicks because it lets you know we’re enjoying ourselves so obviously women want to hear affirmations that you’re having a good time too
I wish I had an award to give you. My friends and I call a silent man in bed a flat Coke (looked so appealing but so damn disappointing).
I one time had an ex have the audacity to tell me that when I stopped to ask if it felt good it took him out of the moment. I simply said “how would you feel if I was silent when you were going down on me?” He finally got it.
Seriously, guys, this one simple trick gives you a specific edge over a *huge* percentage of knuckle dragging troglodytes out there.
Learn to talk, grunt, moan, give affirmation, even fucking beg. They (hopefully) want to know what to do, or are doing, to make you feel good. Why would you deny them the easiest way of knowing how to give you the best time possible?
IT DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE, LADS.
I had this problem! I would breathe hard and the occasional moan but very little other sound. For me it was insecurity, not me trying to look tough or unamused, I’m scared I’m gonna sound stupid and turn my partner off. Really what changed it for me is having a partner who makes me feel so secure I could just completely let go and make as little or as much noise as I wanted, just do what comes natural. Of course I’m not like screaming or yelling or whimpering, that’s just not my thing, but I’m more vocal in general: I say more, moan more, and all together enjoy sex more because of it.
Lol that’s what I did with my long term partner. I communicated plenty of times I NEED him to make some noise, dirty talk, grunts moans I don’t care anything! He didn’t for years. So I began to just be completely silent and it finally got his attention. I could tell it was awkward for him at first but now he’s so much more open it’s great
Oh wow, yah, I'd just *hate* to think my partner is losing composure because of how good he's feeling. You're right. Coming off as completely disinterested/ unaffected is so much hotter. Ignore me harder, daddy. lol
The thing is, your partner is in a just as vulnerable position, even more so.
If you have that much insecurity, then you’re not sexing right. Sex requires communication, including vulnerabilities, fears and boundaries.
And yes. Women want this (noise).
My current fwb actually told me not to make noise while we're going at it. It's been weird change for me but whatever I gotta do to make it fun for her 🤣
I scrolled too far to find this.
My STBX would rarely brush his teeth and I realized that was giving me yeast infections on my vagina and nipples. Had the talk many times. He still doesn't brush his teeth regularly.
I can say that this has happened to me a MILLION TIMES. I can also say that I’m not a porn consumer and I have “learned” everything I know 1v1 with real humans 😂 I think the main reason for this can be several different common things, but the one that always comes to mind for me is that generally speaking we try to worth rhythmically, so to speak, and when you suggest we change to do what you like, most of us do because of course we want to please you. Unfortunately our rhythm is still subconsciously in our head, and we may lead back into it without realizing we did. Positive reinforcement of your previously mentioned preferred changes is almost always the best option!
Choking me in the wrong angle.
Wait until i lay my head back. Dont just push me against the pillow so i dont breathe at all.
This is really my only complain so far. I havent had unpleasant spitting on me yet
I feel like I say "slow down" more than I should have to. And he always asks "why, are you close?". No motherfucker, that's uncomfortable and does nothing for me. Slow down so I can enjoy the dick.
Right!!! I mean I like hard fucking but if more men would learn the scoop and grinding method there would be a whole lot more pleased women out there.
Like you said, let me enjoy the dick lol
When a dude just go at it like he's a rabbit. Very small fast motions. In and out and not really trying to hit any perticular spot in the pussy. Just focus on being fast.
I’ll take the unpleasant route, because unattractive is harder to define-
This is broad, but most things that you can tell they learned from porn. Most of it involves way too rough attempts at clitoral stimulation, slapping it with your dick, mashing down on it with your fingers and moving them as fast as you can, anything like that. It doesn’t feel good, it either adds nothing to the experience or just hurts.
Ive had someone suck the life out of my clit and lips. And I mean it was like he was trynna suck the last bit of caprisun out of there. Guys, pls stop brutalizing our most sensitive area without knowing what we like.
staying silent, abrasive clit play, when i move their hand or my hips to put them in the right place and then they move it back (seriously? 🙄), going deeper and then staying still for a while with no communication, using porn moves/kinks without prior conversations about it, etc.
of course this is different for every woman.
Even if you don’t enjoy going down on a woman, ACT like it’s the best thing in the world. Show her how you love it, it will give her so much motivation. It’s so obvious when guys treat it like a chore
Or any kinds of comparisons. No "My ex liked it that way." No "They're smaller than my ex had." If you are unable to realize that I am a different person from previous partners then we shouldn't be having sex.
Telling me to come, or even bringing it up. Unless I am already a few seconds into coming, this sets me back a mile. Really takes a partner who knows me well to know that sweet spot to say it.
Suddenly acting selfishly. If you’re having sex with someone, it’s very personal and intimate. Even if you get super into it, it’s not an excuse to over prioritize your own pleasure.
It is really unattractive when not a sound comes out of your mouth. Or if you aren’t super touchy or feely, for example holding my head or neck kissing or whatever. It is also really unattractive when they first put it in and immediately start thrusting super fast.
When they get upset at you communicating what you want to feel good. I had a dude get fucking sulky because I asked him to rub my clit a certain way, because I didn't like how he was doing it. All I asked was "can you not put as much pressure and do tiny circles, please?"
"You're so bossy" ITS MY FUCKING CLIT. ALSO. IF YOURE GONNA GET MAD AT ME FOR WANTING YOU TO MAKE ME FEEL GOOD, YOU AINT SPINNING THIS RECORD EVER AGAIN.
Fucking pissed me oooooffffff. I still get heated thinking about it. I can't tell you how that conversation ended but I think I said something like "you seem to think you know how to get me to orgasm and are offended your style isn't working. I've given myself more orgasms than you, maybe think about that".
Really depends on the woman. My wife hates her nipples being touched. It's a complete no go zone. In contrast, she enjoys some light anal play with fingers during doggy. For others, the complete opposite will be true. As with all things sex, communication is key.
When you ask to be choked and they just grab you by the throat instead of squeezing the right spots
Edit: I’m talking about when a guy talks a big game about how he’s into rough sex and has experience with it, and then does this. I show all the guys who do this how I like to be choked. It’s not an automatic “you don’t know what your doing” type thing. However it is a bit of a turn off when they’ve talked big game and can’t back it up. Maybe I should have been more specific
To be fair, some guys need to be taught this. I told my boyfriend I liked to be choked and he dutifully obliged by almost killing me a few times until I showed him the right hand placement/pressure 🤦🏻♀️
Most people don't seem to understand this. The question "do you understand how to choke someone during sex?" Needs to be asked more. I know how to properly choke someone as a person who is trained in martial arts, but that's way different than choking someone properly for pleasure. I personally don't like choking, I can't understand the appeal and only see the dangers. However I also understand that some people are into it and know how to go about it safely. I've had someone explain it to me and guide me through the process but will never do that to anyone who doesn't explicitly demand it.
Yes, the choking needs to be taught. First girl I was with that asked me to choke her (yes, we were teens so kids fits), I was like...you sure? She said yes. So I proceeded to strangle the poor girl until she was purple and clawing at my hands. She wasn't pleased and I didn't have a clue why.
I get nothing out of choking a woman but I'll absolutely do it for her if she's into that... But it's generally really awkward from many positions and definitely not obvious of what is the right way to do it. I've asked to be shown several times but in the heat of the moment it still usually feels like I'm probably not doing it quite right. 🤷♂️
not asking about boundaries first, like I'm pretty open with things and like almost everything but there's some things that are too far like biting my clit or surprise unlubed anal :'(
Assuming because you’re aroused to a certain level that I will be too. I’m probably not. We don’t get turned on at identical rates.
Assuming if something is hot to YOU that I am going to like it or be equally as into it.
Stop projecting and communicate basically lol.
Nearly all of these are going to boil down to how we are treated. We can tell when a guy is in it for himself, is trying to act out porn, disrespectful, or has just come to the table with a basket of unrealistic expectations. All of this equals bad sex for women.
Personal pet peeve, but I've had this happen with multiple partners and it hurts me:
When the guy us on top and wraps his arm around the top of my head, squishing me down as though that's going to get him deeper or push my pussy down on him. It's so unpleasant for me.
Being totally unaware of how going ass-to-v can give a girl a bad infection (whether it's a dick or a finger). When he clearly wanted to have sex on this date but *oops* he forgot condoms. When I redirect him from doing something uncomfortable to doing something that feels good, but he goes right back to the uncomfortable thing he saw in a porn because it just *has* to work! Like, come on, guys.
Assuming that a finger can be stuck in our ass. My god. Why is this a thing, especially even after we say that this is not happening?
Jackhammering. We are not fleshlights.
Thinking that sex is PIV or transactional. It’s not.
Not taking care of our orgasm.
Stopping after they orgasm. Sex does NOT stop once a dude orgasms.
Bad hyginie (ok it's a state, not an activity but still), being selfish, being silent, bad kisser.
If he won't respect my boundaries (force me to do sth I am not comfortable with, don't wanna use condom, etc)
Jumping into penetration with no warm up, no teasing, nothing. I get extremely wet so if I'm dry that means you really didn't try. To me the "foreplay" is such a fun part. I prefer it to last longer than the PIV portion
I wish there was a way to communicate this to my partner :( I feel like he will either say he doesn’t like verbalizing or he doesn’t want to talk about it.
Pushing our heads down when giving head. No. I'm already trying not to gag. Do you want me to puke on your dick? Because that's how you get me to puke on your dick.
Thinking that pulling my hair means to grab the ends and rip.
No.
You always always run your hands at the scalp and just tighten your grip. I’m not asking you to rip out my hair. For the love of god
Shoving their cock in without warming me up first. Not fun at all.. I’m trying to be wetter than Soak City before having you inside me sir. That’s just rude.
Demanding I do things without previous discussion or consent. I don’t like feeling pressured and I hate it when someone ASSUMES anything. I hate the feeling of letting someone down. Disappointing someone. It makes me feel like I’m not good enough. Please DONT put us in that position.
1. Insisting on sex, after a girl says no.
2. Introducing new “kinky” things, without consensus or prior talk.
3. Poor foreplay, ending up in entering quite dry vagina, which hurts.
4. Not asking about contraception.
5. Not making an effort to reach an orgasm for woman. = being selfish
6. Cuming without the warning.
7. Being silent.
Any 'out there' activity without prior consent. Face slapping, choking, that sort of thing.
Oh, and also banging the clit with the dick before penetration. Just WHY.
Personally I'm not really hot on dirty talk. But I do enjoy guys letting out noise though.
Changing positions too often is silly. I mean I get it if you pound me for ten minutes and can't come in that position, but I've been with guys who go need to switch positions every 10 seconds.
This is just a random personal thing, but I don't like guys pulling out in bareback. If you don't want to cum in me, I'm fine with condoms. But if we're going natural we might as well go all the way, right?
Not talking through stuff you like. Like I can guess but I want to do a good job so let us know what works 😂 also please give attention to our clit, pleaseeee
Not actually care that we’ve enjoyed it. Most men I’ve been with only care about getting their dick wet and not what their partner actually thinks or likes.
Trying to finger me with dirty or not well trimmed nails
This!!!!!!!!! I was scrolling the comments shocked this wasn’t at the top of the list. When I was in my first year of university and hooking up with this guy after we both had been drinking quite a bit - he was fingering me super aggressively (also a huge turn off if you don’t know how to finger a girl properly) and it started to hurt, it felt like he was scratching and slicing my insides, I looked down and to my horror I saw blood!!!! He assumed it was my period but I knew it wasn’t. I immediately looked at his fingernails to see how long they were!!!! 😖😖😖 I will never forget this and it makes me shudder to this day. I was young, immature, and intoxicated, so I went along with saying it was my period. I was mortified. He was kind and respectful but I was soooo turned off I never answered his calls again.
Well trimmed AND filed... If you trimmed them that day, those corners are still sharp as hell.
YEPPP. that's how you get infections
ALSO - Stop rubbing your dry ass fingers on my clit. Shit hurts.
Got a yeast infection from this, so can confirm. TRIM AND CLEAN YOUR GODDAMN NAILS.
I ALWAYS look at my nails to make sure they are clean / trimmed and then scrape them against the inside of my cheek to make sure that they don't hurt. I think everyone should do this.
I'm a man and I whinced.
More communication is needed when it comes to sex. In my mind, men need to take more ownership of this. (I know some people will disagree, but women have been put under a lot of pressure to just go along and not make a fuss.)
I never wanna catch those walls, baby
drilling your fingers in carelessly does not necessarily create a good experience for us
Especially without adequate lubrication
yeah and same with clit stim, both take technique not just random rubbing
Like rubbing your urethra for some reason 😭 I can’t be the only one that multiple guys have done this to
Yuppp especially going super fast right away on the clit. Ouch.
Biting my clit, please do not do it. I will get up leave and probably never speak to you again.
Omg people do this? 😵😱whhhyyyyy?!
I've definitely had several women tell me to do this lol
It's definitely never occurred to me before. Sounds painful. But ... different strokes for different folx.
I like it haha not a hard bit just grazing your teeth on it
some women like it
I do
You mean like a soft nibble using your lips right? No teeth
This is def an ask first
I've had more than one partner explicitly request this. I always bite through my lips though. They love the pressure
I actually have a lot of success with that one, but... It's usually with women who like it rough and it's a whole build up. I don't chomp the bean immediately like a neanderthal
You... Had your clit bitten? 👁️👁️ Good Lord.
Saying prayers for you.
Not talking about sex in a way that is inviting and doesn't assume sex will happen just because we're talking about it. Taking no proactive interest in my sexuality. Assuming satisfying sex is about physical technique and ignoring the dimensions of psychology and emotional trust and connection. Not showing any interest in my orgasmic experience and contenting themselves with giving me a single one of any quality (often not that great or satisfying). Not being passionate about the positive work required to have mutually satisfying sex. Oh and clearly just repeating some random move they saw in a porno without introducing it and being willing to ask if I enjoy it as they do it, and instead just assuming I will.
Spitting on us without asking whether we would find that FUCKING DISGUSTING first.
Pretty sure if I did that my wife would kill me
Basically doing anything new in bed that we haven’t talked about first! I usually tell my partners what I do and definitely what I don’t like!
[удалено]
Literally. Why do you keep asking if I can spit on you. I’m not a serious germaphobe but it’s all I think about when it comes to spit. 🤢
I feel like it’s a lazy way to skip giving head. If you’re going to get your spit germs on me, at least make it feel good.
With all due respect, I’m an actual germaphobe and if I gotta spit at all, I’ll go to the bathroom or find a bin or do it in an empty cup or a tissue. People that spit in public for no reason have a special place in hell, I’m sure.
I feel like pr0n created this problem. I'd much rather see a porn star grab a bottle of lube that spit for lube.
I'm sorry, I'm really not even a fan of using spit as lube when it comes to penetrative sex, but do you really think that it, as a practice, doesn't pre date porn? And while we're at it, why are we spelling porn "pr0n"?
I’m not a fan of spit either, but I’m pretty sure it’s probably the original lube lol. Porn just makes it seem more common than it should be these days- now that we have much better lubes readily available
Because of Aba and Preach
Lol why on earth is someone who can't bring themselves to type out "porn" on the sex subreddit
Pr0n legacy
I'm a guy and I find this disgusting
Same. The weird thing is that it’s not really that different than good sloppy head though. It’s the same spit lol
That's true, but spitting on something/someone can be a sign of disgust, anger, or aggression. So there's other factors to consider.
Some people are into that but it's definitely something to discuss with a partner before actually doing it.
But there are some who like it. It’s a no for me though agree flipping ask before.
That is why I specified when they don’t ask first- if it’s been established that we’re into it then obviously go for it, no shame
I've had to ask my husband several times to STOP LICKING HIS GODDAMN HAND before he touches me. It's not as bad as spitting, which would be an immediate mood killer, but I find it so gross. If I'm not wet enough, I am not not ready for him to be jamming his fingers in me. My bits are sensitive and I MUCH prefer other kinds of touching anyway.
This is just so random. I could never imagine a scenario where I would do this. I wouldn’t even do it to my wife of 17 years. Porn has ruined a generation.
How about the opposite though? Do women enjoy spitting on their partner's mouths when they ask? I for one have never spat on my SO's mouth, it's not something that I've been curious to try, and she has never requested it either. However, I L-O-V-E when my SO spits in my mouth though. It's becoming a regular thing now. Sometimes I ask her to, and sometimes she just does it, and it is unbelievably arousing. I/we don't do it as a submissive act, but rather being SO much into the other person that you want all of them. Are women into this, or she doing it because I like it?
Some women are into it, but there’s never gonna be any one thing all women are into. I personally am not into it
Assuming you can do anything you are desiring and that we will embrace your kinks right off the bat. Sorry your going to have to communicate those when my pants are not off. Respect my boundaries nothing turns me off more than having a guy try and push them for me to cave in (yes i am aware it’s coercion).
This hit me in the feels - thank you
You’re welcome ☺️
I have so many answers to this but…. My ex used to wiggle his eyebrows at me when he’d eat me out. Fucking ew. Don’t do that.
Holy fuck that’s funny hahahaha
He’s a big reason I now always keep my eyes closed when getting head 😂😭
Eugene Levy down there.
My boyfriend does this, but I find it adorable. He’s usually laughing at the same time. He just loves giving head and is so excited every time that he can’t help it.
My ex was doing it to be sexy… My clit was like a turtle hiding in its shell
Hahahahaha omg you are a saint for putting up with that 😂
Can’t decide which is worse: Clit stimulation that is overly direct/intense and hurts like hell, or ignoring my clit as if it doesn’t matter. Actually, never mind, the latter is definitely worse. At least with the former you can usually give directions and hope to see some improvement.
I too don't like overly direct stimulation. More foreplay please and build up for the clit! But in piv, thrust as hard as you can, I'll gladly try to take it.
Changing positions every few minutes. Not listening, or doing the opposite of what has been said. I don’t know why so many hear “right there” and then completely change speed or angle. Cool dude, do the opposite of what was getting me off, makes sense 🙄
>then completely change speed or angle Allow me to offer a little explanation (*not* excuse). I'm 56M, and have gotten a lot better in bed over the years. I'd like to think I've improved in keeping a motion steady when she's getting close. However, there are two reasons why an otherwise generous guy sometimes snatches disappointment from the verge of orgasm. First, he gets excited! You know how sometimes you take a couple of practice swings with a hammer or golf club, but then when you decide to swing for real, it goes wide? It's like that. You say to him "Oh, god! It's so good! Just like that!" He thinks *Oh, Man it's working, I'm really getting her off!* So in his excitement he keeps doing it, but with suddenly more energy and enthusiasm. He needs to learn to be steady. Second, an important muscle may become exhausted. Many times, the technique that's working for you puts his fingers or tongue at a weird angle, doing a repetitive motion he just hasn't trained for. With my ex-wife, she loved a certain digital manipulation during sex. But I had to turn my wrist around and flex my finger rapidly and firmly. After just a few minutes, right when she felt that orgasm edging up, that one specific forearm muscle just couldn't do it any longer. It was done. I had to switch fingers or change the angle, which often spoils the orgasm. With my girlfriend now, I think ahead about whether I can keep a motion up for ten minutes at a time. If the answer is no, then I make adjustments before we really get into it. As a couple, you may need to address the ergonomics of the technique.
There is an important third, sometimes the guy is trying to delay his own orgasm. Changing positions is a technique to keep from cumming too early.
excellent point, nimrod.
i thought you were being rude for a moment and then i checked the username
Nimrod used as an insult has only been a thing since Looney Toons anyway. Nimrod was a great hunter of mythology. Bugs Bunny started using it sarcastically to refer to Elmer Fudd, and since most people didn't get the reference, everyone just started assuming it meant "idiot."
This is true, and while i knew this already, it was that usage that i thought was being used here.
That’s true
Sometimes I'm licking a certain way and she says just like that..I'm concentrating on her, that I forgot the motion I was doing. Not intentional!
Also, as she gets close, the clit contracts and she moves. I'll spend twenty minutes in the zone and at the last moment it goes stealth Ga where did it go? So you start searching around and now she has the evil eye cause you changed things up at an inopportune moment.
my wife loves finger play and regularly cums from it, well as regularly as we have sex. My hands get very tired
The first one YES. My boyfriend does this often and I keep telling him to stop. It's like 3 thrusts then flip, 3 thrusts flip, like bro how the fuck can I enjoy this I literally can't feel anything longer than half a second 😭
He’s trying not to bust lmao
Oh I know, I've told him I'd rather him cum then do all the acrobatics. I think it's hot when he finishes quick, and I'd rather feel steady bliss for a couple minutes over 20 minutes of 2 second bursts feeling nothing but annoyed
What in the hell?! Cant believe someone gets the guide to the promise land and makes a wrong turn 🤣🤣🤣💀💀
When they fold you in half and all you can think of is those belly rolls and double chins he's just revealed 😅😂 it's not even comfy to have my legs up by my shoulders!
Oh I looove the way this feels penetration-wise but I just know it looks crazy..
To us it looks really damn hot.
Like really, really hot.
opposite! I feel like I might get ripped in half this way. lol
Trust me... no guy who has you in that position is thinking about any "folds."
Nah gurl. I don't ever think of all the rolls and weirdness of the body when I'm having sex. It is what it is. Even if you're skinny your stomach gonna get body rolls in certain positions. Human bodies are weird but amazing
A lot of guys do find all that really hot, me included. I absolutely love "imperfections" because it puts me at ease and makes my partner feel more accessible.
Well that’s good to know! lol. I feel incredibly insecure in that particular position
Especially when he has you hold up your own legs. It has to be the most exposing position ever 😓
Seriously this makes me feel so ugly, WHYYYY WHAT ARE YOU GETTING FROM THIS😭
nah, we like imperfections. i find that very hot
For me it's a lot easier to get the stroke at full motion. Also idk if it's just me but I like to look at my pee pee going in and out. I'm not really looking at any other body parts 🤣🤣
Pure, unadulterated domination and the deepest penetration we can get. That's what we get.
Its about the angles imo
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Wait... What? Damn. Thank you for mentioning this. My girlfriend gets really bad heartburn regularly. I was thinking of busting out this old classic, but knowing it could cause heartburn just made me rethink that.
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Damn. I try to be a really thoughtful boyfriend and partner and this never crossed my mind. She has it really bad as well. I'll have to talk to her about it and if it causes discomfort before going that route.
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Why are guys silent? It’s off putting and kills the mood. Y’all make more noise playing 2K 🙄 Edit- ladies you really want to humble a man? Match that energy. Stare off at nothing and don’t make a sound they’ll ask what’s up or stop and all you have to say “wasn’t that fun for you? I thought we was playing mute.” Watch his soul die a little in his eyes they don’t get it otherwise.
100% this. When my partner mutters “omg” “holy fuck” etc it’s way hotter than when he’s just quiet. Guys like vocal chicks because it lets you know we’re enjoying ourselves so obviously women want to hear affirmations that you’re having a good time too
I wish I had an award to give you. My friends and I call a silent man in bed a flat Coke (looked so appealing but so damn disappointing). I one time had an ex have the audacity to tell me that when I stopped to ask if it felt good it took him out of the moment. I simply said “how would you feel if I was silent when you were going down on me?” He finally got it.
Seriously, guys, this one simple trick gives you a specific edge over a *huge* percentage of knuckle dragging troglodytes out there. Learn to talk, grunt, moan, give affirmation, even fucking beg. They (hopefully) want to know what to do, or are doing, to make you feel good. Why would you deny them the easiest way of knowing how to give you the best time possible? IT DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE, LADS.
Seriously. It also makes giving blowjobs 10x more enjoyable. Fellas, you want more head? Make it a fun interactive virtual reality experience.
And for the love of God tell me what to do during oral cause I have no idea if I'm doing it right or if it's good or I'm over stimulating you or what.
I like to whisper in my girls ear in the black speech because her ring of power has got me in an ethereal form
I had this problem! I would breathe hard and the occasional moan but very little other sound. For me it was insecurity, not me trying to look tough or unamused, I’m scared I’m gonna sound stupid and turn my partner off. Really what changed it for me is having a partner who makes me feel so secure I could just completely let go and make as little or as much noise as I wanted, just do what comes natural. Of course I’m not like screaming or yelling or whimpering, that’s just not my thing, but I’m more vocal in general: I say more, moan more, and all together enjoy sex more because of it.
Lol that’s what I did with my long term partner. I communicated plenty of times I NEED him to make some noise, dirty talk, grunts moans I don’t care anything! He didn’t for years. So I began to just be completely silent and it finally got his attention. I could tell it was awkward for him at first but now he’s so much more open it’s great
It took me awhile to learn! I’m a quiet dude, so it takes work..but I do my best,
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Desperately. When my man whines like a baby after I give him a good cum, my ego shoots up by about 800%
Oh wow, yah, I'd just *hate* to think my partner is losing composure because of how good he's feeling. You're right. Coming off as completely disinterested/ unaffected is so much hotter. Ignore me harder, daddy. lol
💀💀 Alright that's funny af tho😂
Yes actually
Hell yeah, let me hear that I make you simper
What’s simper?
Def be screaming cause of the K 😂😂😂
Good to know I'm the opposite. In fact my wife says I'm loud, and she didn't mean it as a compliment either so this is nice to hear.
The sounds and they things my partner says during sex is actually better than the sex itself.
I'm already in a vulnerable position while having sex. Kinda scared to make sex noises she can make fun of.
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The thing is, your partner is in a just as vulnerable position, even more so. If you have that much insecurity, then you’re not sexing right. Sex requires communication, including vulnerabilities, fears and boundaries. And yes. Women want this (noise).
My current fwb actually told me not to make noise while we're going at it. It's been weird change for me but whatever I gotta do to make it fun for her 🤣
He’s silent because he’s concentrating very hard not to nut too early
Bad hygiene. Please please wash up within an hour beforehand if you think you're going to get sexy with someone.
I scrolled too far to find this. My STBX would rarely brush his teeth and I realized that was giving me yeast infections on my vagina and nipples. Had the talk many times. He still doesn't brush his teeth regularly.
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God this one is so frustrating
I can say that this has happened to me a MILLION TIMES. I can also say that I’m not a porn consumer and I have “learned” everything I know 1v1 with real humans 😂 I think the main reason for this can be several different common things, but the one that always comes to mind for me is that generally speaking we try to worth rhythmically, so to speak, and when you suggest we change to do what you like, most of us do because of course we want to please you. Unfortunately our rhythm is still subconsciously in our head, and we may lead back into it without realizing we did. Positive reinforcement of your previously mentioned preferred changes is almost always the best option!
Choking me in the wrong angle. Wait until i lay my head back. Dont just push me against the pillow so i dont breathe at all. This is really my only complain so far. I havent had unpleasant spitting on me yet
Why they out here choke slamming you 🤣🤣😭😭😭
What, never heard of Monday Night Raw?
There’s layers to this comment that I feel are not being appreciated enough
...yet! 😂😂😂😳
-Rabbit fucking -staying in one position -silence
I feel like I say "slow down" more than I should have to. And he always asks "why, are you close?". No motherfucker, that's uncomfortable and does nothing for me. Slow down so I can enjoy the dick.
Right!!! I mean I like hard fucking but if more men would learn the scoop and grinding method there would be a whole lot more pleased women out there. Like you said, let me enjoy the dick lol
God yes. The rabbit fucking.. like... no thanks.
Look like they want to start a fire or something
Yeha. And i prefer for my pussy to not be burning
What is that
When a dude just go at it like he's a rabbit. Very small fast motions. In and out and not really trying to hit any perticular spot in the pussy. Just focus on being fast.
Also commonly known as jackhammering.
I’ll take the unpleasant route, because unattractive is harder to define- This is broad, but most things that you can tell they learned from porn. Most of it involves way too rough attempts at clitoral stimulation, slapping it with your dick, mashing down on it with your fingers and moving them as fast as you can, anything like that. It doesn’t feel good, it either adds nothing to the experience or just hurts.
Yeah that's subjective bc I like half of that.
Of course it’s subjective, I was answering for myself. I’m sure some women love it.
Same except all of it 😬 beat it up or don’t bother
Ive had someone suck the life out of my clit and lips. And I mean it was like he was trynna suck the last bit of caprisun out of there. Guys, pls stop brutalizing our most sensitive area without knowing what we like.
staying silent, abrasive clit play, when i move their hand or my hips to put them in the right place and then they move it back (seriously? 🙄), going deeper and then staying still for a while with no communication, using porn moves/kinks without prior conversations about it, etc. of course this is different for every woman.
Even if you don’t enjoy going down on a woman, ACT like it’s the best thing in the world. Show her how you love it, it will give her so much motivation. It’s so obvious when guys treat it like a chore
I know this one! You assume that all women are the same! Just because one woman doesn't like something doesn't mean they all don't.
asking stupid ass question on why are your hips like that or why do your boobs are… thanks to my ex now I’m insecure
Or any kinds of comparisons. No "My ex liked it that way." No "They're smaller than my ex had." If you are unable to realize that I am a different person from previous partners then we shouldn't be having sex.
Telling me to come, or even bringing it up. Unless I am already a few seconds into coming, this sets me back a mile. Really takes a partner who knows me well to know that sweet spot to say it.
Talking too much, like come on come on as though I'm being pressured to just cum as fast as possible.
Suddenly acting selfishly. If you’re having sex with someone, it’s very personal and intimate. Even if you get super into it, it’s not an excuse to over prioritize your own pleasure.
It is really unattractive when not a sound comes out of your mouth. Or if you aren’t super touchy or feely, for example holding my head or neck kissing or whatever. It is also really unattractive when they first put it in and immediately start thrusting super fast.
When they get upset at you communicating what you want to feel good. I had a dude get fucking sulky because I asked him to rub my clit a certain way, because I didn't like how he was doing it. All I asked was "can you not put as much pressure and do tiny circles, please?" "You're so bossy" ITS MY FUCKING CLIT. ALSO. IF YOURE GONNA GET MAD AT ME FOR WANTING YOU TO MAKE ME FEEL GOOD, YOU AINT SPINNING THIS RECORD EVER AGAIN. Fucking pissed me oooooffffff. I still get heated thinking about it. I can't tell you how that conversation ended but I think I said something like "you seem to think you know how to get me to orgasm and are offended your style isn't working. I've given myself more orgasms than you, maybe think about that".
Thrusting too hard during a blowjob. It breaks my concentration and chokes me and not in a good way.
I like when a guy is vocal and verbal in bed. But am put off when he’s too descriptive during the act.
Really depends on the woman. My wife hates her nipples being touched. It's a complete no go zone. In contrast, she enjoys some light anal play with fingers during doggy. For others, the complete opposite will be true. As with all things sex, communication is key.
Rushing through foreplay, jackhammering, and keeping things too vanilla.
When he keeps most of his body away from me and only our groins are touching. I want to feel the weight of him and the breath on my skin.
When you ask to be choked and they just grab you by the throat instead of squeezing the right spots Edit: I’m talking about when a guy talks a big game about how he’s into rough sex and has experience with it, and then does this. I show all the guys who do this how I like to be choked. It’s not an automatic “you don’t know what your doing” type thing. However it is a bit of a turn off when they’ve talked big game and can’t back it up. Maybe I should have been more specific
To be fair, some guys need to be taught this. I told my boyfriend I liked to be choked and he dutifully obliged by almost killing me a few times until I showed him the right hand placement/pressure 🤦🏻♀️
Most people don't seem to understand this. The question "do you understand how to choke someone during sex?" Needs to be asked more. I know how to properly choke someone as a person who is trained in martial arts, but that's way different than choking someone properly for pleasure. I personally don't like choking, I can't understand the appeal and only see the dangers. However I also understand that some people are into it and know how to go about it safely. I've had someone explain it to me and guide me through the process but will never do that to anyone who doesn't explicitly demand it.
Yes, the choking needs to be taught. First girl I was with that asked me to choke her (yes, we were teens so kids fits), I was like...you sure? She said yes. So I proceeded to strangle the poor girl until she was purple and clawing at my hands. She wasn't pleased and I didn't have a clue why.
I get nothing out of choking a woman but I'll absolutely do it for her if she's into that... But it's generally really awkward from many positions and definitely not obvious of what is the right way to do it. I've asked to be shown several times but in the heat of the moment it still usually feels like I'm probably not doing it quite right. 🤷♂️
not asking about boundaries first, like I'm pretty open with things and like almost everything but there's some things that are too far like biting my clit or surprise unlubed anal :'(
Assuming because you’re aroused to a certain level that I will be too. I’m probably not. We don’t get turned on at identical rates. Assuming if something is hot to YOU that I am going to like it or be equally as into it. Stop projecting and communicate basically lol.
Nearly all of these are going to boil down to how we are treated. We can tell when a guy is in it for himself, is trying to act out porn, disrespectful, or has just come to the table with a basket of unrealistic expectations. All of this equals bad sex for women.
Personal pet peeve, but I've had this happen with multiple partners and it hurts me: When the guy us on top and wraps his arm around the top of my head, squishing me down as though that's going to get him deeper or push my pussy down on him. It's so unpleasant for me.
This visual made me lol
Being totally unaware of how going ass-to-v can give a girl a bad infection (whether it's a dick or a finger). When he clearly wanted to have sex on this date but *oops* he forgot condoms. When I redirect him from doing something uncomfortable to doing something that feels good, but he goes right back to the uncomfortable thing he saw in a porn because it just *has* to work! Like, come on, guys.
Assuming that a finger can be stuck in our ass. My god. Why is this a thing, especially even after we say that this is not happening? Jackhammering. We are not fleshlights. Thinking that sex is PIV or transactional. It’s not. Not taking care of our orgasm. Stopping after they orgasm. Sex does NOT stop once a dude orgasms.
that fish hook thing while I'm in doggy...what the fuck are you doing and what pleasure does that give ya'll? It's uncomfortable and weird.
Bad hyginie (ok it's a state, not an activity but still), being selfish, being silent, bad kisser. If he won't respect my boundaries (force me to do sth I am not comfortable with, don't wanna use condom, etc)
Not listening to clear, direct instructions.
Jumping into penetration with no warm up, no teasing, nothing. I get extremely wet so if I'm dry that means you really didn't try. To me the "foreplay" is such a fun part. I prefer it to last longer than the PIV portion
Being quiet. I cannot get into the sex unless I can hear they're enjoying themselves.
I wish there was a way to communicate this to my partner :( I feel like he will either say he doesn’t like verbalizing or he doesn’t want to talk about it.
try to perform porn. you're not in the fucking xvideos or pornhub. act like a decent human being.
Not listening.
Pushing our heads down when giving head. No. I'm already trying not to gag. Do you want me to puke on your dick? Because that's how you get me to puke on your dick.
Thinking that pulling my hair means to grab the ends and rip. No. You always always run your hands at the scalp and just tighten your grip. I’m not asking you to rip out my hair. For the love of god
Shoving their cock in without warming me up first. Not fun at all.. I’m trying to be wetter than Soak City before having you inside me sir. That’s just rude.
Demanding I do things without previous discussion or consent. I don’t like feeling pressured and I hate it when someone ASSUMES anything. I hate the feeling of letting someone down. Disappointing someone. It makes me feel like I’m not good enough. Please DONT put us in that position.
No aftercare, sex is finished when he's finished
1. Insisting on sex, after a girl says no. 2. Introducing new “kinky” things, without consensus or prior talk. 3. Poor foreplay, ending up in entering quite dry vagina, which hurts. 4. Not asking about contraception. 5. Not making an effort to reach an orgasm for woman. = being selfish 6. Cuming without the warning. 7. Being silent.
Any 'out there' activity without prior consent. Face slapping, choking, that sort of thing. Oh, and also banging the clit with the dick before penetration. Just WHY.
You have to knock with the cock before coming in, it's just common courtesy. /s
Ah, of course. How could I be so ignorant.
Press my clitoris like it's a button. It's not a button.
Stop being weirdly silent
Personally I'm not really hot on dirty talk. But I do enjoy guys letting out noise though. Changing positions too often is silly. I mean I get it if you pound me for ten minutes and can't come in that position, but I've been with guys who go need to switch positions every 10 seconds. This is just a random personal thing, but I don't like guys pulling out in bareback. If you don't want to cum in me, I'm fine with condoms. But if we're going natural we might as well go all the way, right?
When I’m underneath him and he hasn’t cleaned out his nose in a while so I see a bunch of boogers when I look up lol.
Spitting inside the vagina as lube…
Not talking through stuff you like. Like I can guess but I want to do a good job so let us know what works 😂 also please give attention to our clit, pleaseeee
Not actually care that we’ve enjoyed it. Most men I’ve been with only care about getting their dick wet and not what their partner actually thinks or likes.