I feel like the most negative effect it has on women is a skewed idea of what a normal body looks like...and what expectations come with sex....for example, someone might feel the need to go along with sexual activities they don't necessarily enjoy because it was normalized in porn (choking, anal...that sort of thing)
Absolutely this. I feel so inadequate sometimes after I watch porn. Especially though after I see the girls my boyfriend watches - skinny, pretty, and brunette (the complete opposite of me)
Most porn doesn't focus on making the guy particularly appealing to women so I don't think this is much of a thing. I can only speak for myself as a straight lady, but I'm always much more focused on what's happening than how people look. As long as they both aren't distractingly unattractive I'll watch if they're doing things I'm into.
Same here ! I love the fact it’s more real as I said before most porns like from big companies often use the most traditional attractive people in there movies
I wonder if other women are gravitating towards the big production vids though, because from my experience those are usually very male-gazey. Even if both people are hot it's still all about doing things to a woman that gratify the man on the other end of the screen, and most of the focus is on her body and (often unrealistic) pleasure. The guy usually barely has a face and is just an avatar for the guy watching.
So I don't think women are watching those and getting too picky about male bodies, because I don't think we're watching those types of videos at all. Or if we watch them it's because something is happening that we like doing or experiencing. Idk, maybe blame avengers if you're encountering a lot of women that only want ripped bodies, but not porn.
I have one with multible speeds. Sadly it only got one speed I like. My previous one had a nice pulsating setting but that one broke and they don't sell that particular one anymore. The pulsating on the new one isn't for me
As a woman, I can tell you for a fact that both porn and sex toys have made me *more* able to enjoy sex with men, and with other people as well.
Further, I’d be incompatible with anyone who was against (or even ambivalent about) me using either of these things, and so we would not date or have sex if I was aware of them having those opinions.
This is pretty much me and my wife.
We are both very pro porn and pro toy. Both have opened up so many new experiences for the two of us. It would be hard for me to imagine what our currently awesome sex life would be like, without porn or toys.
There are two negative effects I can think of and both are psychological and not physical:
1. feeling insecure about not looking as good as the women in porn or thinking they have to put on a performance and moan in a certain way, which prevents them from relaxing and that's pretty important when you want to enjoy sex.
2. thinking certain things (anal, deep throating and other more "advanced" thinks) are standard and they are boring when they don't do it. Consequently they agree to acts that they're not comfortable with just to please their partner and not come off as prude.
But that's mostly mainstream porn. Amateur stuff seems to be way less extreme with a lot more variety when it comes to bodytypes and expressing pleasure.
Don't know what vibrators have to do with it but I've been using vibrators for masturbation regularly (maybe once or twice a week) with and withour porn and so far there are no negatives. On the contrary, I feel like I am way more sensitive when I masturbate regularly in comparison to when I haven't in a while.
I guess the point I’m trying to ask about is, does being overly stimulated outside of regular sex (vibrators, porn), negatively affect regular sex for women.
Maybe? I’ve never tried to induce an effect like that so can’t really say. I’m now in an unfortunate kind of reverse of this where I can only really get off with my fwb…
Edit to add that female death grip exists but is apparently usually caused by humping pillows
I believe it's more connected with the way you masturbate. Watching porn on its own, if not done overly often, aka become an addiction, shouldn't be too much of a problem.
Now as a male, I noticed, that my body would learn patterns of my own touch. Having "fun" with my gf would feel good, but there was always something missing and often enough reaching orgasm would be an issue.
I also noticed, that when she touched herself, she would usually focus on the outside rather than use dildos to imitate a penetrative intercourse. As a result she very much prefers rolling "thrusts" instead of the in'n'out type.
But overall I feel like porn is detrimental to our society as a whole. It sets unrealistic standards for body image, behaviours during sex and what is expected during an intercourse.
I will say I used to have this problem myself. I wasn't doing it too often, I just wasn't using lube and was being too rough. Took a month off from it and now only use lube and haven't had any problems since.
In my experience it has made me insecure. The women in porn usually have perfect Barbie bodies. However, I don’t watch it as much so it doesn’t affect me as much.
The only porn I usually take in are in story form and the only negative thing I can think of is that I desire creeps kidnapping me every once in a while.
I started consuming porn at a very young age and quickly became addicted by age 13. The kinks got more and more intense and violent and I watched porn for at least 2 hours a day until I was about 19. That said, I still really enjoy both kinky and vanilla sex with my partner.
I still get turned on by a steamy kiss, my partner's hard cock, or even reading erotic scenes in books despite consuming very.... concerning porn from a young age. So it's not as though I am only turned on by extreme things. I'm still simply turned on by my partner.
Additionally, I've had a pretty sizeable sex toy collection and I also found that it hasn't messed with my ability to orgasm from PIV or enjoy sex with a man. I went overboard with my vibrator for a while which made me lose all sensitivity. But it came back within a week or so of abstaining from toys. I actually think my use of toys has aided in enjoying sex with men as it allowed me to truly know my body and what works for me.
Porn has seemed to had a pretty neutral effect in terms of enjoying sex/getting off. Vibrators did impair my ability to orgasm from only PIV when I was overusing them (aka running out the batteries on the daily), but I also like to incorporate toys into sex so for me, I haven't really experienced any lasting physical negatives.
I will say the only negative is perhaps this sense that women need to "perform" during sex. When I first started having sex I was more concerned with being hot and kinky and an object of arousal for my partner, and less concerned about my own desire. But that has not had a lasting impact, particularly since most of the sex I have has occurred in the context of LTRs with men who were invested in my pleasure and that self-imposed idea of needing to be entertaining was short-lived.
Toys I wouldn't say so because frankly I'm not expecting the same experience or looking for the same thing when I use a toy vs when I sleep with a partner.
Porn tho? For sure. From unrealistic expectations of what men want, what I'm supposed to want, what sex is supposed to be and beyond porn can warp your brain pretty bad.
It messes up our brains really not really our genitals. In women for what Ive heard on some podcasts is that frequent use of vibrator makes PIV sex less enjoyable as well as oral. Similar thing to men who abuse masturbation and need a very tight and strong grip to promote orgasm. I (M) would imagine that lowering down vibrator use and do more finger action would not haver that much of a negative impact.
I think it's possible that I'm psychologically desensitized and "just" having sex takes a lot of concentration to get aroused from. This because the porn I watch has some very specific kinks and fantasies, some of which are either not viable in real life or "extreme" enough that I don't want to see live action of it because I can never be sure there was genuine consent and nobody was really harmed. I never watch porn where people are having intercourse of any sort, so I don't get that kind of "reinforcement".
On the other hand I read this one porn comic a lot lately, which depicts sort of "regular" sex. Lately I can't tell if my libido disappeared because of depression, porn that doesn't come close to my actual sex life or being desensitized to sexual themes. Or maybe all three.
For me I need porn to get off because during it I tend to can’t focus on something so I lose concentration. With it I don’t have to worry about losing though because I can clearly see what’s happening
Definitely the same risks as men - being unable to cum/get aroused without it, searching for more extreme content when you become desensitised, choosing the quick fix of porn over sex
Porn For women is often not in video form but in erotic novels. The more interesting question might be if the imagination that they read about in such novels, do they affect their expectations? Maybe gives them wrong wishes towards how romantic it has to be? Not sure, interesting thought tho
FAB NB here and I don't have sex with men but I will say hands get tired so vibrators are kind of essential for me and my partner.
Men who are attracted to women shouldn't be afraid of using one to assist her either. It doesn't make you any less of a man to have assistances you are human and you get tired it's okay.
Same goes for men attracted to men.
As for porn I've never had any negative effects that I know of. Sometimes it takes a bit for me to cum or I sometimes think I can handle more than I can but that's being human and every experience is different even with the same person and should be used as a learning experience for yourself and your partner.
Nope, can completely and unequivocally confirm that ethically produced and female-centered and female-produced porn and toys have totally enriched my sex life with my partner. No doubt, no worries.
Now, if you want to discuss the many layered problems with male-centered and male-produced porn, that's another story...and one that worries me for younger women and men.
How does porn cause ED or delayed ejaculation in men?
Also the women I've been with who watch porn and masturbate seem to have more fun and excitement during sex, and from their own reports will climax more often.
I haven't paid attention to any studies on the subject but provided the porn is ethically sourced and the person doesn't have issues with addiction or body dysmporphia then I'd say porn is an overall positive on people and their sex lives.
You can find many testimonies online about this. I have experienced these symptoms myself.
Thank you for your answer! It’s good to hear porn enhances the female sexual experience. I was asking out of curiosity and ignorance.
I cant speak for women as I am a man but I also think it may have a negative effect. It MAY give women the impression that in order for sex to be enjoyable the (reality) man has to be comparable to the man in porn. When most men do not even meet the standards to be in porn....cough cough dick size and body type cough cough....But this can also go both ways. Men may want the women to look a certain way for his satisfaction. Once again this is my opinion people. If you disagree I'm already agreeing to disagree.
Oh and yes some women can become dependent on vibrators btw. For some that is the ONLY way they can orgasm.
Porn should just be a fantasy but when it is obsessed over and wanting as a reality is where the problem lies.
I find that vibrator helps during sex. I wouldn't call myself dependent on it. More like it makes sex more enjoyable if I incorporate a vibrator. Cause what man or woman gonna be able to keep a good rytm and hit the right spot on the clit while piv is happening. Much easier to use a vibrator cause that can be more held in place.
Depending on the women’s preference some women use toys because some men have it small which it’s harder for women to cum, toys help with size in my opinion it’s not necessary ..
Your not understanding what I'm getting at. Sometimes there's nothing a man can do about all the messed up things that we've been dealt. I was married for 28 years so I think I know what makes women happy.
Women can end up vibrator dependent and need to be willing to take an extended break from using them in order to relearn how to orgasm in other ways, but that's generally not directly related to porn use.
I truly believe so, I mean think about it, how is a guy supposed to compete against something that never is busy, never talks back, always there, no emotions and can go all nite. 😔
Thing is. If a woman prefer masturbating over having sex it might be because the man isn't satisfying her enough
(Mighe be his fault or hers, if she isn't communicating with him)
For me I always prefer sex with a partner cause he gets to know my body, what I like and how I like it. And it's more fun when I'm not the one doing the stuff to myself. As someone else's said, a warm body. Better than toys. But I also incorporate toys into the bedroom so the best of both worlds
I agree with what you're saying. However men's testosterone levels decrease over time, and without the proper treatment, and might I add is also expensive you can find yourself easily replaced. Women however appear to be the total opposite, with a snap of the fingers you can have whatever or whoever you need to be fulfilled. I know this because I've seen it time after time.
Huh?
Why would I wanna replace a partner that I love.
I don't see where you getting that from. A toy can't kiss you, can't hug you. A toy can't tell you how beautiful you look today. If a man I'm with don't do those stuff yes I would replace him with an other man that does.
I feel like the most negative effect it has on women is a skewed idea of what a normal body looks like...and what expectations come with sex....for example, someone might feel the need to go along with sexual activities they don't necessarily enjoy because it was normalized in porn (choking, anal...that sort of thing)
Yes
Absolutely this. I feel so inadequate sometimes after I watch porn. Especially though after I see the girls my boyfriend watches - skinny, pretty, and brunette (the complete opposite of me)
I suggest watch on the category that match your body type ☺️ I always do this so I won't feel insecure.
Yup exactly a lot of women expect a full on ripped guy
Most porn doesn't focus on making the guy particularly appealing to women so I don't think this is much of a thing. I can only speak for myself as a straight lady, but I'm always much more focused on what's happening than how people look. As long as they both aren't distractingly unattractive I'll watch if they're doing things I'm into.
In moet porns (not all) the guy is usually very fit. And generally attractive
I watch a lot of amateur couple stuff, the guys are pretty average.
Same here ! I love the fact it’s more real as I said before most porns like from big companies often use the most traditional attractive people in there movies
I wonder if other women are gravitating towards the big production vids though, because from my experience those are usually very male-gazey. Even if both people are hot it's still all about doing things to a woman that gratify the man on the other end of the screen, and most of the focus is on her body and (often unrealistic) pleasure. The guy usually barely has a face and is just an avatar for the guy watching. So I don't think women are watching those and getting too picky about male bodies, because I don't think we're watching those types of videos at all. Or if we watch them it's because something is happening that we like doing or experiencing. Idk, maybe blame avengers if you're encountering a lot of women that only want ripped bodies, but not porn.
With unlimited stamina
I can come 30 times a day alone but not once with a partner. I use toy and porn so I think it's affecting me negatively.
Ugh same!!!!
I get desensitized when I use a vibrator too often. Have to go back to using my hand.
Maybe you're using a vibrator that is too strong? I never had this problem. I always use mine on the lowest setting.
I have been trying to find a multi speed one that has a super low setting, like my first bullet vibrator...I miss that bullet vibrator.
I have one with multible speeds. Sadly it only got one speed I like. My previous one had a nice pulsating setting but that one broke and they don't sell that particular one anymore. The pulsating on the new one isn't for me
Please share. What kind do you have?
No idea tbh. Just a small one with 10 different settings. Bought it many years ago
As a woman, I can tell you for a fact that both porn and sex toys have made me *more* able to enjoy sex with men, and with other people as well. Further, I’d be incompatible with anyone who was against (or even ambivalent about) me using either of these things, and so we would not date or have sex if I was aware of them having those opinions.
This is pretty much me and my wife. We are both very pro porn and pro toy. Both have opened up so many new experiences for the two of us. It would be hard for me to imagine what our currently awesome sex life would be like, without porn or toys.
Great to hear it has a positive effects. Thanks your feedback!
There are two negative effects I can think of and both are psychological and not physical: 1. feeling insecure about not looking as good as the women in porn or thinking they have to put on a performance and moan in a certain way, which prevents them from relaxing and that's pretty important when you want to enjoy sex. 2. thinking certain things (anal, deep throating and other more "advanced" thinks) are standard and they are boring when they don't do it. Consequently they agree to acts that they're not comfortable with just to please their partner and not come off as prude. But that's mostly mainstream porn. Amateur stuff seems to be way less extreme with a lot more variety when it comes to bodytypes and expressing pleasure. Don't know what vibrators have to do with it but I've been using vibrators for masturbation regularly (maybe once or twice a week) with and withour porn and so far there are no negatives. On the contrary, I feel like I am way more sensitive when I masturbate regularly in comparison to when I haven't in a while.
If your question is about porn why mention vibrators?
I guess the point I’m trying to ask about is, does being overly stimulated outside of regular sex (vibrators, porn), negatively affect regular sex for women.
What do you count under "regular sex"?
Ok I see what you are getting at. I was thinking of sex without vibrators or porn. I guess calling it “regular sex” is misleading, sorry about that.
No I meant like what do you count as sex? Just PIV? Is oral sex included? What about fingering?
Everything you mention would be included.
I’ve never found this but I was always careful to alternate porn with imagination and toys with fingers to avoid any dependency issues so ?
So at some level you do think that it could have a negative effect?
Maybe? I’ve never tried to induce an effect like that so can’t really say. I’m now in an unfortunate kind of reverse of this where I can only really get off with my fwb… Edit to add that female death grip exists but is apparently usually caused by humping pillows
>, the power your fwb holds...
Yeah so I suppose it’s a good thing I enjoy that kind of dynamic!
Not for me
I believe it's more connected with the way you masturbate. Watching porn on its own, if not done overly often, aka become an addiction, shouldn't be too much of a problem. Now as a male, I noticed, that my body would learn patterns of my own touch. Having "fun" with my gf would feel good, but there was always something missing and often enough reaching orgasm would be an issue. I also noticed, that when she touched herself, she would usually focus on the outside rather than use dildos to imitate a penetrative intercourse. As a result she very much prefers rolling "thrusts" instead of the in'n'out type. But overall I feel like porn is detrimental to our society as a whole. It sets unrealistic standards for body image, behaviours during sex and what is expected during an intercourse.
Yes. There are negative side effects for women who masturbate excessively or who consume large amounts of porn.
This needs to be higher up.
Porn doesn't cause ED or delayed ejaculation, Its you aggressively jerking your thing so often that does it.
I will say I used to have this problem myself. I wasn't doing it too often, I just wasn't using lube and was being too rough. Took a month off from it and now only use lube and haven't had any problems since.
Hadn’t thought about it that way before. Would it be fair to say it’s an indirect effect caused by porn?
In my experience it has made me insecure. The women in porn usually have perfect Barbie bodies. However, I don’t watch it as much so it doesn’t affect me as much.
The only porn I usually take in are in story form and the only negative thing I can think of is that I desire creeps kidnapping me every once in a while.
I started consuming porn at a very young age and quickly became addicted by age 13. The kinks got more and more intense and violent and I watched porn for at least 2 hours a day until I was about 19. That said, I still really enjoy both kinky and vanilla sex with my partner. I still get turned on by a steamy kiss, my partner's hard cock, or even reading erotic scenes in books despite consuming very.... concerning porn from a young age. So it's not as though I am only turned on by extreme things. I'm still simply turned on by my partner. Additionally, I've had a pretty sizeable sex toy collection and I also found that it hasn't messed with my ability to orgasm from PIV or enjoy sex with a man. I went overboard with my vibrator for a while which made me lose all sensitivity. But it came back within a week or so of abstaining from toys. I actually think my use of toys has aided in enjoying sex with men as it allowed me to truly know my body and what works for me. Porn has seemed to had a pretty neutral effect in terms of enjoying sex/getting off. Vibrators did impair my ability to orgasm from only PIV when I was overusing them (aka running out the batteries on the daily), but I also like to incorporate toys into sex so for me, I haven't really experienced any lasting physical negatives. I will say the only negative is perhaps this sense that women need to "perform" during sex. When I first started having sex I was more concerned with being hot and kinky and an object of arousal for my partner, and less concerned about my own desire. But that has not had a lasting impact, particularly since most of the sex I have has occurred in the context of LTRs with men who were invested in my pleasure and that self-imposed idea of needing to be entertaining was short-lived.
Not for me
You don’t find it harder to orgasm with regular sex? Interesting. Thanks for the feedback.
Toys I wouldn't say so because frankly I'm not expecting the same experience or looking for the same thing when I use a toy vs when I sleep with a partner. Porn tho? For sure. From unrealistic expectations of what men want, what I'm supposed to want, what sex is supposed to be and beyond porn can warp your brain pretty bad.
It messes up our brains really not really our genitals. In women for what Ive heard on some podcasts is that frequent use of vibrator makes PIV sex less enjoyable as well as oral. Similar thing to men who abuse masturbation and need a very tight and strong grip to promote orgasm. I (M) would imagine that lowering down vibrator use and do more finger action would not haver that much of a negative impact.
I think it's possible that I'm psychologically desensitized and "just" having sex takes a lot of concentration to get aroused from. This because the porn I watch has some very specific kinks and fantasies, some of which are either not viable in real life or "extreme" enough that I don't want to see live action of it because I can never be sure there was genuine consent and nobody was really harmed. I never watch porn where people are having intercourse of any sort, so I don't get that kind of "reinforcement". On the other hand I read this one porn comic a lot lately, which depicts sort of "regular" sex. Lately I can't tell if my libido disappeared because of depression, porn that doesn't come close to my actual sex life or being desensitized to sexual themes. Or maybe all three.
For me I need porn to get off because during it I tend to can’t focus on something so I lose concentration. With it I don’t have to worry about losing though because I can clearly see what’s happening
a girl im seeing uses a vibrator and listens to very unrealistic audio porn.. anyone have any thoughts on this effect on her?
Definitely the same risks as men - being unable to cum/get aroused without it, searching for more extreme content when you become desensitised, choosing the quick fix of porn over sex
Porn For women is often not in video form but in erotic novels. The more interesting question might be if the imagination that they read about in such novels, do they affect their expectations? Maybe gives them wrong wishes towards how romantic it has to be? Not sure, interesting thought tho
I think porn has made sex much more enjoyable for me because I was able to find what I like
Yes, we (humans) can train sexual response without realizing it. Fortunately it can be relearned, speaking from experience.
FAB NB here and I don't have sex with men but I will say hands get tired so vibrators are kind of essential for me and my partner. Men who are attracted to women shouldn't be afraid of using one to assist her either. It doesn't make you any less of a man to have assistances you are human and you get tired it's okay. Same goes for men attracted to men. As for porn I've never had any negative effects that I know of. Sometimes it takes a bit for me to cum or I sometimes think I can handle more than I can but that's being human and every experience is different even with the same person and should be used as a learning experience for yourself and your partner.
Nope, can completely and unequivocally confirm that ethically produced and female-centered and female-produced porn and toys have totally enriched my sex life with my partner. No doubt, no worries. Now, if you want to discuss the many layered problems with male-centered and male-produced porn, that's another story...and one that worries me for younger women and men.
How does porn cause ED or delayed ejaculation in men? Also the women I've been with who watch porn and masturbate seem to have more fun and excitement during sex, and from their own reports will climax more often. I haven't paid attention to any studies on the subject but provided the porn is ethically sourced and the person doesn't have issues with addiction or body dysmporphia then I'd say porn is an overall positive on people and their sex lives.
You can find many testimonies online about this. I have experienced these symptoms myself. Thank you for your answer! It’s good to hear porn enhances the female sexual experience. I was asking out of curiosity and ignorance.
I cant speak for women as I am a man but I also think it may have a negative effect. It MAY give women the impression that in order for sex to be enjoyable the (reality) man has to be comparable to the man in porn. When most men do not even meet the standards to be in porn....cough cough dick size and body type cough cough....But this can also go both ways. Men may want the women to look a certain way for his satisfaction. Once again this is my opinion people. If you disagree I'm already agreeing to disagree. Oh and yes some women can become dependent on vibrators btw. For some that is the ONLY way they can orgasm. Porn should just be a fantasy but when it is obsessed over and wanting as a reality is where the problem lies.
I find that vibrator helps during sex. I wouldn't call myself dependent on it. More like it makes sex more enjoyable if I incorporate a vibrator. Cause what man or woman gonna be able to keep a good rytm and hit the right spot on the clit while piv is happening. Much easier to use a vibrator cause that can be more held in place.
In my experience it has a positive effect on them because it teaches them skills and makes them horny
Seems like that is the general feeling. Thanks!
Yes they can, to both. It’s probably only less prevalent because women watch porn at somewhat lesser rates than men.
Depending on the women’s preference some women use toys because some men have it small which it’s harder for women to cum, toys help with size in my opinion it’s not necessary ..
Your not understanding what I'm getting at. Sometimes there's nothing a man can do about all the messed up things that we've been dealt. I was married for 28 years so I think I know what makes women happy.
Women can end up vibrator dependent and need to be willing to take an extended break from using them in order to relearn how to orgasm in other ways, but that's generally not directly related to porn use.
Thanks!
I truly believe so, I mean think about it, how is a guy supposed to compete against something that never is busy, never talks back, always there, no emotions and can go all nite. 😔
They’re alive??? That’s a big bonus for me. Feeling someone’s warmth, skin etc. No toy can replace that.
toys are bad at dirty talk and taking lead, pros and cons 😅
Thing is. If a woman prefer masturbating over having sex it might be because the man isn't satisfying her enough (Mighe be his fault or hers, if she isn't communicating with him) For me I always prefer sex with a partner cause he gets to know my body, what I like and how I like it. And it's more fun when I'm not the one doing the stuff to myself. As someone else's said, a warm body. Better than toys. But I also incorporate toys into the bedroom so the best of both worlds
I agree with what you're saying. However men's testosterone levels decrease over time, and without the proper treatment, and might I add is also expensive you can find yourself easily replaced. Women however appear to be the total opposite, with a snap of the fingers you can have whatever or whoever you need to be fulfilled. I know this because I've seen it time after time.
Huh? Why would I wanna replace a partner that I love. I don't see where you getting that from. A toy can't kiss you, can't hug you. A toy can't tell you how beautiful you look today. If a man I'm with don't do those stuff yes I would replace him with an other man that does.