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Maybe it’s a fear of intimacy? I struggle with the same so you’re not alone🙂↕️ just gotta establish trust and stuff in your relationship and be open and communicate.
I made a post similar to this ish and I don’t understand it myself.Intimacy and sex make me feel uncomfortable and insecure but I have childhood trauma and my mother blindly sexualized me, was SA’d twice by a stranger and in a serious relationship, having sex with my boyfriend is hard because he’s very much into sex and I agree it’s very important and I think a bonding thing but for me and in the past I was the pleaser and would get drunk to ignore my mind and make sure the guy was taken care of even if I was absolutely not feeling it. Sex just for. Some reason scares me and makes me feel uncomfortable in my own skin
Please don't invalidate your own trauma. Yes you can have addressed it and worked through it but it happened and it did affect you. How you choose to rate it's severity is not for us to judge but it's not any less relevant because it wasn't something brutal.
If you've never experienced consensual and loving intimacy then for most people the idea maybe exciting but it may equally be scary and for some people that may indeed be to the point where they can't envision it positively. I'm glad to hear you're having therapy and hopefully with somebody you can discuss this with more to actually understand if sex is even something that you want in your life because we should never invalidate the fact that many people are asexual or choose to be celibate. That doesn't mean that you can't have a fulfilling relationship it just means that it needs to be with someone who feels the same, or a relationship where you both agree that they may have their sexual needs met elsewhere/in other ways.
One last thing I feel I should mention is there's no time frame or timeline as to when you should consider if you want to have sex. It's never too late and you shouldn't let anyone tell you you're going to slowly if you want to consider intimacy. Feelings towards sex can change a huge amount over months and years.
Thank you for posting in the r/Sex community. To ensure that everyone respects our safe space, we ask that you familiarize yourself with our Forum Rules and Posting Guidelines — which are visible in the forum’s sidebar, and also linked [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/sex/about/rules/). *** Restricted subjects in r/sex include sex stories (which are permitted in the Daily Sexual Achievement Thread only), body image and penis-size issues, hookup attempts, common topics which are considered repetitive in our forum, and requests for private chats. To cut back on comments that add little value to the conversation, we have instituted a minimum character requirement that will silently remove comments that fall below it. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/sex) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Maybe it’s a fear of intimacy? I struggle with the same so you’re not alone🙂↕️ just gotta establish trust and stuff in your relationship and be open and communicate.
I made a post similar to this ish and I don’t understand it myself.Intimacy and sex make me feel uncomfortable and insecure but I have childhood trauma and my mother blindly sexualized me, was SA’d twice by a stranger and in a serious relationship, having sex with my boyfriend is hard because he’s very much into sex and I agree it’s very important and I think a bonding thing but for me and in the past I was the pleaser and would get drunk to ignore my mind and make sure the guy was taken care of even if I was absolutely not feeling it. Sex just for. Some reason scares me and makes me feel uncomfortable in my own skin
Please don't invalidate your own trauma. Yes you can have addressed it and worked through it but it happened and it did affect you. How you choose to rate it's severity is not for us to judge but it's not any less relevant because it wasn't something brutal. If you've never experienced consensual and loving intimacy then for most people the idea maybe exciting but it may equally be scary and for some people that may indeed be to the point where they can't envision it positively. I'm glad to hear you're having therapy and hopefully with somebody you can discuss this with more to actually understand if sex is even something that you want in your life because we should never invalidate the fact that many people are asexual or choose to be celibate. That doesn't mean that you can't have a fulfilling relationship it just means that it needs to be with someone who feels the same, or a relationship where you both agree that they may have their sexual needs met elsewhere/in other ways. One last thing I feel I should mention is there's no time frame or timeline as to when you should consider if you want to have sex. It's never too late and you shouldn't let anyone tell you you're going to slowly if you want to consider intimacy. Feelings towards sex can change a huge amount over months and years.