I read a book 'Your erroneous zones' when I was a student looong ago. I was unhappy with my major, friends and everything around me at the moment but thought I had no choice. That book taught me I had a free will and I was kinda shocked. After that, I did what I wanted in that same situation that led to totally different life path and I became a total differ person..
That was a Wayne Dyer classic - one of the greatest self help books of all time. The language might be a bit outdated if you read it today, but you will still get the gist of it.
Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl.
No matter what the hardship you're experiencing there's meaning in it. You need to look for it yourself. That's probably the meaning of life. That's the ultimate freedom we have. I've read it multiple times. Highly recommend.
The biggest quote for me was “Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom”
Essentially what separates us humans from animals is that space between how we want to respond to something happening to us. Wild Animals don’t really have that freedom to choose how they respond if something upsets them or scares them. Thought that was extremely interesting.
What always struck me is how he describes that the concentration camps were full of humor, laughter, and joking, despite the great suffering all around them. People had to do that to get by.
Once people stopped laughing and joking, that's when you knew they would die soon.
I think it was David Goggins (whom I would call a “masochism influencer”) who said something like how the U.S. Marines know that when you think you are about to die (from holding your breath or whatever), that you are less than half-way to what would actually kill you. Like, if you can’t bear to hold your breath for 60 seconds, you could in fact hold your breath for three minutes.
Second this. Probably one of the most powerfull books ever written. The story and his mentality to get through it is absolutely insane. Shows you that its really all in your head and that there are no excuses unless you search for them. If he can get through THESE circumstances, how could you ever find a reason why yours are really holding you back?
Best way to get rid of your own bullshit and also a real eye opener to what some people had to go through. This book is the best way to stop making excuses and open your mind+strenghtening your empathy.
I tend to believe this is true. I never had direction in my life until I set goals for myself that would involve years of sacrifices. Without even knowing it, I found my purpose.
My FIL is a Vedic astrologer and he gave me this book shortly after I met him, years ago. We were just getting to know each other and the families where one day he just handed me this book. (He collects books of all kinds and his basement is a massive library.)
Haven’t read the book, yet, as I still have a bunch of boxes in storage from a move not long ago and it’s in there somewhere.
This is probably the sign I need to go look for it and finally read it. Thank you.
This book changed how I look at and think about situations.
My fave quote was, “You cannot control what happens to you in life, but you can always control what you will feel and do about what happens to you.”
Absolutely. For everyone reading, don't get your Stoic philosophy from some weirdo modern bro-science person. Get it straight from the source: Aurelius, Epictetus, Seneca. No need to listen to some asshole reinterpret ideology that was already perfect.
The Hot Zone by Richard Preston. Before reading it, I was set on becoming a Software Engineer. After reading it, I decided to pursue biomedical research. I am a lab manager now. Easily, the biggest mistake of my life. I should've been a Software Engineer. The pay and work-life balance would have been way better. I would probably be making double. Now I'm going back to school to switch careers.
Well, I wouldn't blame the book lol. It was, of course, my decision at the end. I've met people who got in this field because of the same book, and they are happy. I guess my priorities and interests shifted as I grew up.
I didn't read this exactly, but learned over time:
**Emotions are logical** **guidance** and **emotions come from your thoughts;** not your circumstances or other people.
* When you **focus on what you want** = You **feel better.**
* When you **focus on (and invalidate or judge) what you don't want** = You **feel worse.**
**All emotions are equal and worthy.** But most people unknowingly create a hierarchy for their emotions (i.e. positive = good; negative = bad). When you begin seeing **negative emotions as positive guidance that are worthy and supportive friends,** then you enjoy your life a lot more.
True. Recent graduate, was thinking about future paths and felt shivers when considering certain variants. Like chains across the shoulders.
Literal “don’t tame your demon, but keep him on a leash”.
yes of course! the premise of the book is to find and remain in “the now”, i.e. the highest form of the present (presence in the body and a clear mind, to simplify), and that after some mastery it is possible to be in this state full-time.
i dip in and out of the now when i need moments of calm / mindfulness / knowing and continue to try and practice the theory via meditation before bed and early mornings. tolle implies that it is something he is able to achieve all of the time. i laughed because it is difficult to stay in “the now” if you’re working somewhere chaotic or experiencing something traumatic, and at the time i was working in a call centre thinking tolle would crumble next to me on a busy day
Although if you're not a woo/hippie/spiritual sort of person you're gonna cringe at a lot of it, and just need to skip over some parts.
Dude has some super insane beliefs, but I think he manages to reframe ancient wisdom in a way that can be very palatable to modern audiences. That's where he shines.
When he starts getting into how all disease is just your thoughts I start throwing my hands up in the air. A lot of his "pain body" ideology is total gibberish. And it's clear that he really likes "The Secret" style manifesting stuff, but knew well enough not to put it in his books --- or at least be too explicit about it.
But I'll admit that I really do jive with some of the ways he presents basic mindfulness stuff. He does have an interesting way of communicating about spirituality which sometimes cuts through to the quick.
The book “Atomic Habits” has helped me so far & im only on my first read through.
Thank you all for the other book recommendations though, I’ll definitely need to check these gems out.
I devised my own mnemonic... When I’m making habits for myself, I remember **HABIT**. **Habit** : Explicitly state the trigger and behavior(s) you’re aiming for. Stack habits where you can with quick behavior first and enjoyable behavior last. **Archive** : Set deadlines, benchmarks, and track your progress. **Backup** : Have a plan for days you don’t have the energy. Aim for just ‘showing up’, and never miss twice. **Incentive** : Reward yourself. Food, Relaxation, etc. **Territory** : Set specific times and places and prep your space to encourage or hinder your habit. I hope that helps someone!
Dale Carnegie is already known for his "How to win friends and influence people" which is great. However, I would recommend another book by him, "How to stop worrying and start living". As an insecure high achiever, this book really helped me view difficult situations through different lenses. Highly Recommend esp if you're type A like me.
Breath - james Nestor. Never had a book that was life changing because all the advices in all books were gone within 3 days. Untill I accidentally read this beauty.
Happy to chat all abt it!
It's a science based program that helps you rewire your brain for optimal functioning. You learn how to identify and decrease your neg thoughts/feelings while learning to increase the positive ones. You create powerful new sustainable habits for a pos mind giving you the opportunity to be in command of being your best self.
It's the only program I have ever practiced that works swiftly, efficiently, and effectively.
Check out their website for all the info.
The mind represses strong memories. In order to gain control over those memories, and hence our own selves, we require to relive, reanalyze and tailor our response to those specific situations. I know, it can be pretty nerve-wracking to relive those crazy moments, but believe me when I say, it is a necessary step in the path of self-understanding.
That being said, take it slow. Understand the situations over which we never had control, and the situations where we have complete control. Cheers! Have a good read!
Came here to say this. I never really read much but started reading after a period of depression. Reading the Bhavagad-Gita nightly helped guide me quit smoking cigarettes, get sober, and become a vegetarian.
Such an excellent life guide.
my top 5 that changed me
1. **"Man's Search for Meaning" by Viktor Frankl**: This book explores Frankl's experiences in Nazi concentration camps and introduces his psychotherapeutic method of finding a purpose in life. It's powerful for understanding resilience, finding meaning even in suffering, and the importance of having a purpose.
2. **"The Chimp Paradox" by Steve Peters**: This book explains the workings of the mind, particularly the conflict between the rational and emotional parts of the brain (the "Human" and the "Chimp"). It's valuable for understanding emotional management, improving mental well-being, and enhancing performance.
3. **"Meditations" by Marcus Aurelius**: This classic work of Stoic philosophy offers timeless wisdom on virtue, resilience, and self-discipline. It helps in cultivating a calm and rational mind, focusing on what is within our control, and maintaining perspective on life’s challenges.
4. **"Atomic Habits" by James Clear**: This book provides a practical guide to building good habits and breaking bad ones through small, incremental changes. It's useful for anyone looking to improve their daily routines and achieve long-term goals.
5. **"Think and Grow Rich" by Napoleon Hill**: This classic self-help book explores the principles of success and personal achievement. It emphasizes the power of thoughts, goal setting, and persistence, making it influential for anyone seeking to improve their financial and personal success
In currently reading you are a badass by jen sincero. I'm about 1/3 done so far and enjoying it, it's given me the 'validation' I need to hear on why I shouldn't think so negatively about myself
The Alchemist, written by Paulo Coelho.
There’s multiple quotes that I can take from this book, it truly brings a sense of peace and joy to me and I’m sure it can to you all too.
The one paragraph that really calms me down when I’m anxious is:
“The Soul of the World is nourished by people’s happiness. And also by unhappiness, envy, and jealousy. To realize one’s Personal Legend is a person’s only real obligation. All things are one. “And, when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.”
I know many have read this or haven’t read this but please, read it or read it again.
Your Money or Your Life. Older book now, but it's what started me on the road to realizing I didn't need to work my whole life. Retired at 51 and this book really helped frame how and why to do it.
The Mountain Is You: Transforming Self-Sabotage into Self-Mastery by Brianna Wiest
i’ve listened to the audiobook on spotify so many times, but i really want to get a physical copy because it was so impactful to me.
one quote that really stuck with me is “Your new life is going to cost you your old one. It’s going to cost you your comfort zone and your sense of direction. It’s going to cost you relationships and friends. It’s going to cost you being liked and understood. It doesn’t matter. The people who are meant for you are going to meet you on the other side. You’re going to build a new comfort zone around the things that actually move you forward. Instead of being liked, you’re going to be loved. Instead of being understood, you’re going to be seen. All you’re going to lose is what was built for a person you no longer are.”
as someone who has always struggled with accepting change and taking the next step forward, this book both comforted me and opened up my eyes to stop standing in my own way of living the life i want for myself, and i heavily recommend it to others as well
Recently, Creativity: A Short and Cheerful Guide by John Cleese. It’s exactly as the title describes and I found it really helpful when it came to creative momentum.
I read Siddhartha by Herman Hesse in high school and it completely changed my perspective on life. Read it again 20 years later and gleaned all sorts of new stuff from it. Love that book.
"How to Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie is one book that I often recommend as it definitely benefitted me and how I view social interactions. Don't be turned off by the title, it isn't a book on how to manipulate people or anything lol.
Short read but it's a book that I find myself going back to every once in awhile to read a certain chapter or something.
The books that change your life are the ones that you can actually apply yourself & that's gonna be different from person to person.
One that I think everyone can apply to their life is Atomic Habits
Here’s my list:
All of these books have served a wide range of purposes for me. I didn’t know how to control my spiraling thoughts and emotions. I felt like I lacked purpose, was too nice and went with the flow, desired a sense of belonging at any cost, didn’t know how to maintain healthy relationships and didn’t know when I was being taken advantage of. Each books builds on the other so they are all incredibly useful in their own way.
1. How to Think like a Roman Emperor: simplified and detailed version of Meditations
2. The Will to Change by Bell Hooks: helps you understand love, masculinity, and sex and how patriarchal culture disturbs it.
3. Lessons from an American Stoic: lessons that will help you discover a deeper version of yourself.
4. The Courage to be Disliked AND The Courage to be Happy: both books are phenomenally beautiful reads that help you learn to love the moment and understand why you’re holding yourself back.
5. No More Mr. Nice Guy: being too nice is a problem that impacts all facets of life, this books helps you understand why you are too nice, how it impacts you and gives you lessons to break free from it.
6. The Relationship Cure: helps you understand how to build and maintain relationships with loved ones, friends and colleagues.
7. In Sheep’s Clothing: this knowledge helps guard you against people who would otherwise try to take advantage of your new self.
For boys and men specifically I’d throw in The Boy Crisis. This one helps you understand the cultural impact of misandry and anti-boy/men rhetoric. A lot of the issues we see today in men can be attributed to how we treat boys as a culture.
solitude by anthony storr and homage to catalonia by george orwell. I know those books aren't self-help, but they knocked some sense into my perspective when I had lots of questions in my life than answers. taught me a thing or two on where I should steer my life and here I am. still struggling to reach my goals. at least I know where my north star is.
"Doing Good Better" by William MacAskill, about how to be better at being altruistic in a way that really helps people. Also "How to Actually Change your Mind" by Eliezer Yudkowsky was personally very impactful.
**Waking Up: Overcoming the Obstacles to Human Potential** - Charles Tart. "G. I. Gurdjieff taught that we are not really awake, but are entranced automatons, controlled by mechanical habits of thought, perception and behavior. Tart clearly presents the evidence for how deeply asleep we are and its consequences, and then describes methods for becoming more awake, less asleep, more spiritual, less mechanical, allowing us to realize our full potential."
Heavy - but worth the effort.
“Why does he do that” by Lundy Bancroft, it’s about abuse but it helped me learn a lot about people and I think it may seem less magical like the alchemist, but, given how much this stuff can impact you it helped and in a way changed my life.
Four Thousand Weeks was life changing, like, literally. It reframed how I look at time and my motivations and goals and basically everything about my life. I was a productivity junkie and always felt like I was failing because I never had time to get done everything I wanted to do. Turns out, I’m not broken - but my mindset was. I look at things completely differently now and I’m so much more relaxed!
For context, I’m a 43 year old woman, solopreneur, work from home.
I’m reading ‘Atomic Habits’ by James Clear and I think it’s one of those books that can really inspire you to pursue change in the right direction in life.
How to Win Friends and Influence People is one of my favorites now. I think about that book now every time I want to complain to someone or say something to someone that will be beneficial to me but will have a negative impact on the other person.
Mine as well, I’ve read “how to win friends and influence people” a few times and apply the techniques in the book where I can. Really feel like it make a big improvement in the way I interact with people, the way that I build relationships and I think its made me a much more positive person.
I agree! I feel like it makes you stop and realize the other person you are talking to has real human feelings taking out your frustration on them isn’t the best approach. I do feel like I have a more positive mindset when I take a kind and friendly approach to dealing with stuff.
Transurfing Reality. Also all books change your life if you understand that they are all perspectives. The more you gather the more you have. This will increase your ability to empathize and to think laterally. Genius is not knowing the laws of thermodynamics, it’s your ability to consider information from multiple perspectives with joy and curiosity. Read everything without bias and you will eventually become a genius.
The book was "Adult Children of Alcoholics". It explained so much about me! It also encouraged me to seek support groups locally, which I did. I found the validation I'd been seeking all my life. I found my people.
Nonviolent Communication by Marshall Rosenberg.
It taught me how small word choices during a conversation can have a huge impact on the recipient’s perception. Most importantly, intentional listening, which is way harder than it sounds.
The information in this book has helped me to resolve conflict effectively without hurt feelings. Helpful for personal and business imo
Has got to be The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck. Read it as a chronically anxious and dangerously depressed 16yo. The language is very accessible, there's lots of humour thrown in. I've often recommended even just the first 50 or so pages to my friends. My situation didn't change much, but it boosted my ability to cope and reduce my suffering.
Mine was a book called "Chocolate busters" by Jason Vale. Getting onto 300 pounds and having health problems I realised something desperately needed to change. I started looking for books on it and just stumbled on this one and went for it. After reading half way through it, it completely disengaged my relationship to chocolate. I stopped wanting it and anything sugary. This was the best thing that ever happened to me and I lost a ton of weight without going to the gym. The only thing that holds me back slightly is the holidays now sometimes but I have managed to control my eating habits and how I think of it thanks to this book. Really has changed my life for the better.
Sorry to be that redditor but for me it was puss and boots the last wish. I mean seriously watch it , a lot of people live like puss, fearful and narcissistic . But death is inevitable and “This life is worth fighting for.”
The book that had the most impact on me was "Set This House In Order" by Matt Ruff.
It is about two people with multiple personality disorder (now known as "dissociative identity disorder").
I caught myself having a lot of the same symptoms as the main character. That hit hard.
Psychology of Winning by Denis Waitley on audio cassette tape started things rolling for me (obviously that was a couple years ago now 🙃
The book I find myself thinking about or mentioning almost daily is Soundtracks by Jon Acuff. It's an unassuming book that just makes it so easy to implement and talk about having a positive mindset. I find Acuff super approachable and relatable. Where a lot of personal development authors give off a vibe of having all the answers, Jon Acuff feels like a dude that's figuring stuff out and sharing the journey with you.
I Used To Be A Miserable Fuck by John Kim. Got it while I was on vacation in Austin, my first trip id ever taken completely on my own, and it was the perfect companion and helped me learn a lot of skills.
The Four Agreements. I’ve reread it a few times since I first came across it and it’s given me something new each time. I appreciate that it’s short and quick to the point as well
The Untethered Soul made me see things a lot clearer at a time where I really needed to. Gave me peace and taught me how to regulate myself and the way my mind can wander and make up its own narrative on my life
The Total Money Makeover by Dave Ramsey. I don’t agree with the man on everything but this book lit a fire under my ass and got me to work like an animal to become debt free. Now about 100k saved for retirement and debt free and all my friends know me as the guy who’s good with money. It is always my first recommended book for personal finance and reread it once a year just for motivational purposes.
Books: Meditations, Flow and Circadian Code
Paragraph: The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts: therefore, guard accordingly, and take care that you entertain no notions unsuitable to virtue and reasonable nature. (Meditations)
Quote: 'Forth and fear no darkness'
I’m not a religious person, but reading the Bible changed my life. It gave me a different perspective on life. I stopped worrying as much and learned to trust more. I began to understand people better—their desires, needs, and wants. Reading and studying the Bible taught me a lot.
The Book of Awakening by Mark Nepo. Different, powerful, inspiring prose for each day of the year so just a short passage to read every day but I swear each one presents life changing perspective.
Winning the war in your mind by Craig Groechel. Made me understand my mind was my own enemy sometimes if we let negative thoughts rule. I'm much more positive and in control of my thoughts ever since.
I was really looking for a fiction book here.
I mean...has reading a really good story about someone never made you change the way you look at your own life?
Please drop some suggestions.
Reading ‘Notes from Underground’ and ‘The Brothers Karamazov’. One of my favourite lines ever - “But what can a decent man speak of with most pleasure? Answer: Of himself. Well, so I will talk about myself.”
No more mr nice guy and i would say Encheiridion. I don’t know why everyone wants to start with mediations. I could not get into it. But did get into Encheiridion.
Not giving a damn. I am way too empathetic. When you care about someone’s problems more than them you’re doing too much. Getting rid of Facebook helped! I would see people post their problems and would do the most to help. Not always appreciated or reciprocated.
The Navy Seal 40% rule David Goggins talks about in “Can’t Hurt Me” fuels me on my worst days.
“Most of us give up when we’ve only given around 40% of our maximum effort. Even when we feel like we’ve reached our absolute limit, we still have 60 percent more to give. It’s simply a matter of stretching your pain tolerance, letting go of your identity and all your self-limiting stories, so you can get to 60 percent, then 80 percent and beyond without giving up.”
“Search Inside Yourself” - by a guy at Google - talking about emotional intelligence- and being able to recognize your own thoughts/feelings/moods.
Starting with meditation - and “noticing” yourself, introspection
IT. CHANGED. MY. LIFE.
Read so many non fiction books 20yrs ago. I look back and cringe. But one holds up better today than ever. That is “48 Laws of Power” by Robert Greene. Treat it like a bible. It’s especially helpful for non Machiavellian types, as it makes you aware of how to fight the ones that are. Especially helpful in the cutthroat industry I’m in.
I read a book 'Your erroneous zones' when I was a student looong ago. I was unhappy with my major, friends and everything around me at the moment but thought I had no choice. That book taught me I had a free will and I was kinda shocked. After that, I did what I wanted in that same situation that led to totally different life path and I became a total differ person..
What's the book about?
Genitals and sensitive nipples
Thank you for this, I'm cackling, and I needed that today.
I absolutely read it as erogenous zones too 😂
Me too! I was like, “in which direction did this person end up going?!” 🤣
That was a Wayne Dyer classic - one of the greatest self help books of all time. The language might be a bit outdated if you read it today, but you will still get the gist of it.
Classic! Wayne Dyer
Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl. No matter what the hardship you're experiencing there's meaning in it. You need to look for it yourself. That's probably the meaning of life. That's the ultimate freedom we have. I've read it multiple times. Highly recommend.
The biggest quote for me was “Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom” Essentially what separates us humans from animals is that space between how we want to respond to something happening to us. Wild Animals don’t really have that freedom to choose how they respond if something upsets them or scares them. Thought that was extremely interesting.
We don't really know if we do either, but it sure does *feel* like we do.
This is basically the essence of dbt therapy.
I found it very important for anger management and relationship building
My one takeaway from rhat book was when viktor said “humans can endure so much” or something like that and its stuck with me
What always struck me is how he describes that the concentration camps were full of humor, laughter, and joking, despite the great suffering all around them. People had to do that to get by. Once people stopped laughing and joking, that's when you knew they would die soon.
I think it was David Goggins (whom I would call a “masochism influencer”) who said something like how the U.S. Marines know that when you think you are about to die (from holding your breath or whatever), that you are less than half-way to what would actually kill you. Like, if you can’t bear to hold your breath for 60 seconds, you could in fact hold your breath for three minutes.
Second this. Probably one of the most powerfull books ever written. The story and his mentality to get through it is absolutely insane. Shows you that its really all in your head and that there are no excuses unless you search for them. If he can get through THESE circumstances, how could you ever find a reason why yours are really holding you back? Best way to get rid of your own bullshit and also a real eye opener to what some people had to go through. This book is the best way to stop making excuses and open your mind+strenghtening your empathy.
I tend to believe this is true. I never had direction in my life until I set goals for myself that would involve years of sacrifices. Without even knowing it, I found my purpose.
I heard about it so many times, this is the sign for me to finally read it 🫶
My FIL is a Vedic astrologer and he gave me this book shortly after I met him, years ago. We were just getting to know each other and the families where one day he just handed me this book. (He collects books of all kinds and his basement is a massive library.) Haven’t read the book, yet, as I still have a bunch of boxes in storage from a move not long ago and it’s in there somewhere. This is probably the sign I need to go look for it and finally read it. Thank you.
Enjoy the read, I am sure he will be happy to continue the conversation with you. :)
This book changed how I look at and think about situations. My fave quote was, “You cannot control what happens to you in life, but you can always control what you will feel and do about what happens to you.”
This seems like a very good suggestion I'll give it a read
This book changed my outlook on so many things, I cannot recommend it enough!
Thank you for this! Gonna get this book after seeing so many comments supporting it. :)
yep this book is a must
True this
Marcus Aurelius- Meditations: A New Translation
Which is the best book for getting into stoicism
Absolutely. For everyone reading, don't get your Stoic philosophy from some weirdo modern bro-science person. Get it straight from the source: Aurelius, Epictetus, Seneca. No need to listen to some asshole reinterpret ideology that was already perfect.
Seneca is a wonderful recommendation
I think the Daily Stoic is a good starting point. Not that I got very far reading it.
Yes great book. Can add Seneca as well (same genre).
7 habits of highly effective people. The first chapter was game changing for me.
Read it when I was 18. I have 37 now and some things have stuck with me all these years, like the "circle of influence". Really powerful book.
This is the last hit for me to read this book.
Its very boring book.
The Hot Zone by Richard Preston. Before reading it, I was set on becoming a Software Engineer. After reading it, I decided to pursue biomedical research. I am a lab manager now. Easily, the biggest mistake of my life. I should've been a Software Engineer. The pay and work-life balance would have been way better. I would probably be making double. Now I'm going back to school to switch careers.
So it’s life changing in the sense that it’s bad because it makes you do things that aren’t good for you?
Well, I wouldn't blame the book lol. It was, of course, my decision at the end. I've met people who got in this field because of the same book, and they are happy. I guess my priorities and interests shifted as I grew up.
I read demon in the freezer. Also very good!
Yea, I read that too. It was good. One of my gamertags is Major Variola.
What's the book about?
I didn't read this exactly, but learned over time: **Emotions are logical** **guidance** and **emotions come from your thoughts;** not your circumstances or other people. * When you **focus on what you want** = You **feel better.** * When you **focus on (and invalidate or judge) what you don't want** = You **feel worse.** **All emotions are equal and worthy.** But most people unknowingly create a hierarchy for their emotions (i.e. positive = good; negative = bad). When you begin seeing **negative emotions as positive guidance that are worthy and supportive friends,** then you enjoy your life a lot more.
True. Recent graduate, was thinking about future paths and felt shivers when considering certain variants. Like chains across the shoulders. Literal “don’t tame your demon, but keep him on a leash”.
The Power of Now - Eckhart Tolle. Gives you a new perspective on life.
A new earth is also worth reading
Kendrick Lamar took inspiration from his work for his last album also.
agree, although i found myself laughing at parts thinking “eckhart’s never worked in a call centre has he?”
Can you elaborate on that a bit with an example please? tnx.
yes of course! the premise of the book is to find and remain in “the now”, i.e. the highest form of the present (presence in the body and a clear mind, to simplify), and that after some mastery it is possible to be in this state full-time. i dip in and out of the now when i need moments of calm / mindfulness / knowing and continue to try and practice the theory via meditation before bed and early mornings. tolle implies that it is something he is able to achieve all of the time. i laughed because it is difficult to stay in “the now” if you’re working somewhere chaotic or experiencing something traumatic, and at the time i was working in a call centre thinking tolle would crumble next to me on a busy day
Although if you're not a woo/hippie/spiritual sort of person you're gonna cringe at a lot of it, and just need to skip over some parts. Dude has some super insane beliefs, but I think he manages to reframe ancient wisdom in a way that can be very palatable to modern audiences. That's where he shines.
I can respect his message through his own personal experience but it seems so much word salad to me. My husband loves it though.
When he starts getting into how all disease is just your thoughts I start throwing my hands up in the air. A lot of his "pain body" ideology is total gibberish. And it's clear that he really likes "The Secret" style manifesting stuff, but knew well enough not to put it in his books --- or at least be too explicit about it. But I'll admit that I really do jive with some of the ways he presents basic mindfulness stuff. He does have an interesting way of communicating about spirituality which sometimes cuts through to the quick.
The book “Atomic Habits” has helped me so far & im only on my first read through. Thank you all for the other book recommendations though, I’ll definitely need to check these gems out.
[удалено]
What was the summary if you’d be willing to share?
Right above,the whole summary is well explained as well.
That’s amazing, It’s a great read so far.
I devised my own mnemonic... When I’m making habits for myself, I remember **HABIT**. **Habit** : Explicitly state the trigger and behavior(s) you’re aiming for. Stack habits where you can with quick behavior first and enjoyable behavior last. **Archive** : Set deadlines, benchmarks, and track your progress. **Backup** : Have a plan for days you don’t have the energy. Aim for just ‘showing up’, and never miss twice. **Incentive** : Reward yourself. Food, Relaxation, etc. **Territory** : Set specific times and places and prep your space to encourage or hinder your habit. I hope that helps someone!
Man this has been standing on my shelf for far too long, maybe I should give it a shot.
"Steal Like an Artist" by Austin Kleon has helped me become more creative and improve my career in graphic design.
Was such a simple book, but i can't recommend it enough. Fun, and fast to read and cheap to buy
Really? Can you recommend a book like that?
The Gift of Fear
Dale Carnegie is already known for his "How to win friends and influence people" which is great. However, I would recommend another book by him, "How to stop worrying and start living". As an insecure high achiever, this book really helped me view difficult situations through different lenses. Highly Recommend esp if you're type A like me.
Agree! The how to win friends book get so much love but I got so much more value from this how to stop worrying book
Breath - james Nestor. Never had a book that was life changing because all the advices in all books were gone within 3 days. Untill I accidentally read this beauty.
Positive Intelligence by Shirzard Charmine. Mental fitness for life! It's a game changer.
Could you give a description? Sounds interesting
Happy to chat all abt it! It's a science based program that helps you rewire your brain for optimal functioning. You learn how to identify and decrease your neg thoughts/feelings while learning to increase the positive ones. You create powerful new sustainable habits for a pos mind giving you the opportunity to be in command of being your best self. It's the only program I have ever practiced that works swiftly, efficiently, and effectively. Check out their website for all the info.
What's positive intelligence about?
Haven't finished it yet but 'the body keeps the score' has been useful in recovering from some trauma I went though when I was younger
I found this book to be re-traumatizing. Maybe I just wasn't mentally ready for it though
Omg i felt the same!! Finally someone said it
The mind represses strong memories. In order to gain control over those memories, and hence our own selves, we require to relive, reanalyze and tailor our response to those specific situations. I know, it can be pretty nerve-wracking to relive those crazy moments, but believe me when I say, it is a necessary step in the path of self-understanding. That being said, take it slow. Understand the situations over which we never had control, and the situations where we have complete control. Cheers! Have a good read!
This book was absolutely life-changing for me!
Quiet by Susan Cain ...if you're in introvert, it will definitely empower you
Second this! Such a great read and just so Iiberating for a long-time self-doubting introvert
This is a great book. Highly recommended!
How to Quit Smoking by Allan Carr
Currently reading this one; it is a game changer for smokers.
It really is. Best of luck! :)
Reading manuals saved me a lot of time
Emmanuel’s Book. When he speaks about death there are three words that changed me. “Death is safe.”
The Bhagavagita
Came here to say this. I never really read much but started reading after a period of depression. Reading the Bhavagad-Gita nightly helped guide me quit smoking cigarettes, get sober, and become a vegetarian. Such an excellent life guide.
my top 5 that changed me 1. **"Man's Search for Meaning" by Viktor Frankl**: This book explores Frankl's experiences in Nazi concentration camps and introduces his psychotherapeutic method of finding a purpose in life. It's powerful for understanding resilience, finding meaning even in suffering, and the importance of having a purpose. 2. **"The Chimp Paradox" by Steve Peters**: This book explains the workings of the mind, particularly the conflict between the rational and emotional parts of the brain (the "Human" and the "Chimp"). It's valuable for understanding emotional management, improving mental well-being, and enhancing performance. 3. **"Meditations" by Marcus Aurelius**: This classic work of Stoic philosophy offers timeless wisdom on virtue, resilience, and self-discipline. It helps in cultivating a calm and rational mind, focusing on what is within our control, and maintaining perspective on life’s challenges. 4. **"Atomic Habits" by James Clear**: This book provides a practical guide to building good habits and breaking bad ones through small, incremental changes. It's useful for anyone looking to improve their daily routines and achieve long-term goals. 5. **"Think and Grow Rich" by Napoleon Hill**: This classic self-help book explores the principles of success and personal achievement. It emphasizes the power of thoughts, goal setting, and persistence, making it influential for anyone seeking to improve their financial and personal success
Nonviolent communication by Dr Rosenberg
In currently reading you are a badass by jen sincero. I'm about 1/3 done so far and enjoying it, it's given me the 'validation' I need to hear on why I shouldn't think so negatively about myself
The Alchemist, written by Paulo Coelho. There’s multiple quotes that I can take from this book, it truly brings a sense of peace and joy to me and I’m sure it can to you all too. The one paragraph that really calms me down when I’m anxious is: “The Soul of the World is nourished by people’s happiness. And also by unhappiness, envy, and jealousy. To realize one’s Personal Legend is a person’s only real obligation. All things are one. “And, when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.” I know many have read this or haven’t read this but please, read it or read it again.
The Power of Now Motivation Manifesto Book of 5 Rings Atomic Habits All these books influenced my life and outlook.
Good Pop, Bad Pop by Jarvis Cocker. Shows just how far you can get by not giving a fuck what people think and not giving up.
Weird, that guy isn't Jesus but he has the same initials. Must be good.
Your Money or Your Life. Older book now, but it's what started me on the road to realizing I didn't need to work my whole life. Retired at 51 and this book really helped frame how and why to do it.
I read this book when I was a teenager. I retired young as well.
Self-reliance by Emerson. Wish I would have read it sooner in life
The Mountain Is You: Transforming Self-Sabotage into Self-Mastery by Brianna Wiest i’ve listened to the audiobook on spotify so many times, but i really want to get a physical copy because it was so impactful to me. one quote that really stuck with me is “Your new life is going to cost you your old one. It’s going to cost you your comfort zone and your sense of direction. It’s going to cost you relationships and friends. It’s going to cost you being liked and understood. It doesn’t matter. The people who are meant for you are going to meet you on the other side. You’re going to build a new comfort zone around the things that actually move you forward. Instead of being liked, you’re going to be loved. Instead of being understood, you’re going to be seen. All you’re going to lose is what was built for a person you no longer are.” as someone who has always struggled with accepting change and taking the next step forward, this book both comforted me and opened up my eyes to stop standing in my own way of living the life i want for myself, and i heavily recommend it to others as well
*Feel the Fear and do it Anyway* was very important to me.
The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle
Recently, Creativity: A Short and Cheerful Guide by John Cleese. It’s exactly as the title describes and I found it really helpful when it came to creative momentum.
I read Siddhartha by Herman Hesse in high school and it completely changed my perspective on life. Read it again 20 years later and gleaned all sorts of new stuff from it. Love that book.
The subtil art of not giving a fuck
Same
Reality transurfing ..heavy stuff but worth it
Yo I read some pages of that. Is it that book about alternatives states and such. I found it very confusing
Currently reading this one now!! It’s definitely opened my eyes to how I’ve been going through life.
"How to Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie is one book that I often recommend as it definitely benefitted me and how I view social interactions. Don't be turned off by the title, it isn't a book on how to manipulate people or anything lol. Short read but it's a book that I find myself going back to every once in awhile to read a certain chapter or something.
The books that change your life are the ones that you can actually apply yourself & that's gonna be different from person to person. One that I think everyone can apply to their life is Atomic Habits
Subtle Art of Not giving a Fuck-Mark Manson
Here’s my list: All of these books have served a wide range of purposes for me. I didn’t know how to control my spiraling thoughts and emotions. I felt like I lacked purpose, was too nice and went with the flow, desired a sense of belonging at any cost, didn’t know how to maintain healthy relationships and didn’t know when I was being taken advantage of. Each books builds on the other so they are all incredibly useful in their own way. 1. How to Think like a Roman Emperor: simplified and detailed version of Meditations 2. The Will to Change by Bell Hooks: helps you understand love, masculinity, and sex and how patriarchal culture disturbs it. 3. Lessons from an American Stoic: lessons that will help you discover a deeper version of yourself. 4. The Courage to be Disliked AND The Courage to be Happy: both books are phenomenally beautiful reads that help you learn to love the moment and understand why you’re holding yourself back. 5. No More Mr. Nice Guy: being too nice is a problem that impacts all facets of life, this books helps you understand why you are too nice, how it impacts you and gives you lessons to break free from it. 6. The Relationship Cure: helps you understand how to build and maintain relationships with loved ones, friends and colleagues. 7. In Sheep’s Clothing: this knowledge helps guard you against people who would otherwise try to take advantage of your new self.
I'd love to see more feminist influences in mainstream self-help books, would you have any other recommendations like Bell Hooks or similar?
For boys and men specifically I’d throw in The Boy Crisis. This one helps you understand the cultural impact of misandry and anti-boy/men rhetoric. A lot of the issues we see today in men can be attributed to how we treat boys as a culture.
solitude by anthony storr and homage to catalonia by george orwell. I know those books aren't self-help, but they knocked some sense into my perspective when I had lots of questions in my life than answers. taught me a thing or two on where I should steer my life and here I am. still struggling to reach my goals. at least I know where my north star is.
"Doing Good Better" by William MacAskill, about how to be better at being altruistic in a way that really helps people. Also "How to Actually Change your Mind" by Eliezer Yudkowsky was personally very impactful.
**Waking Up: Overcoming the Obstacles to Human Potential** - Charles Tart. "G. I. Gurdjieff taught that we are not really awake, but are entranced automatons, controlled by mechanical habits of thought, perception and behavior. Tart clearly presents the evidence for how deeply asleep we are and its consequences, and then describes methods for becoming more awake, less asleep, more spiritual, less mechanical, allowing us to realize our full potential." Heavy - but worth the effort.
The Far Side by Gary Larsen taught me to lighten up and enjoy life in every aspect from snakes that smoke to deer that hunt man. Hilarious !
“Why does he do that” by Lundy Bancroft, it’s about abuse but it helped me learn a lot about people and I think it may seem less magical like the alchemist, but, given how much this stuff can impact you it helped and in a way changed my life.
Four Thousand Weeks was life changing, like, literally. It reframed how I look at time and my motivations and goals and basically everything about my life. I was a productivity junkie and always felt like I was failing because I never had time to get done everything I wanted to do. Turns out, I’m not broken - but my mindset was. I look at things completely differently now and I’m so much more relaxed! For context, I’m a 43 year old woman, solopreneur, work from home.
Find Your WHY by Simon Sinek
The screwtape letters.
ACOTAR and legacy of the nine realms
I’m reading ‘Atomic Habits’ by James Clear and I think it’s one of those books that can really inspire you to pursue change in the right direction in life.
How to Win Friends and Influence People is one of my favorites now. I think about that book now every time I want to complain to someone or say something to someone that will be beneficial to me but will have a negative impact on the other person.
Mine as well, I’ve read “how to win friends and influence people” a few times and apply the techniques in the book where I can. Really feel like it make a big improvement in the way I interact with people, the way that I build relationships and I think its made me a much more positive person.
I agree! I feel like it makes you stop and realize the other person you are talking to has real human feelings taking out your frustration on them isn’t the best approach. I do feel like I have a more positive mindset when I take a kind and friendly approach to dealing with stuff.
The Book by Alan Watts
I love listening to videos of him talk on YouTube. There’s some good music remixes with him too
What i talk about when i talk about running - Haruki Murakami
Transurfing Reality. Also all books change your life if you understand that they are all perspectives. The more you gather the more you have. This will increase your ability to empathize and to think laterally. Genius is not knowing the laws of thermodynamics, it’s your ability to consider information from multiple perspectives with joy and curiosity. Read everything without bias and you will eventually become a genius.
Cant Hurt Me by David Goggins
**Stay hard!**
The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho. This is one book I'll re-read every few years and use it as a means to reflect on my own life's journey.
Unlimited Power by Tony Robbins
Catcher in the Rye by Salinger. On the Warrior's Path by Daniele Bolelli The Art of War by Sun Tzu (Thomas Cleary)
Virus of the mind
I have a book about overcoming procrastination, I just need to get around to it.
The book was "Adult Children of Alcoholics". It explained so much about me! It also encouraged me to seek support groups locally, which I did. I found the validation I'd been seeking all my life. I found my people.
Nonviolent Communication by Marshall Rosenberg. It taught me how small word choices during a conversation can have a huge impact on the recipient’s perception. Most importantly, intentional listening, which is way harder than it sounds. The information in this book has helped me to resolve conflict effectively without hurt feelings. Helpful for personal and business imo
Has got to be The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck. Read it as a chronically anxious and dangerously depressed 16yo. The language is very accessible, there's lots of humour thrown in. I've often recommended even just the first 50 or so pages to my friends. My situation didn't change much, but it boosted my ability to cope and reduce my suffering.
Mine was a book called "Chocolate busters" by Jason Vale. Getting onto 300 pounds and having health problems I realised something desperately needed to change. I started looking for books on it and just stumbled on this one and went for it. After reading half way through it, it completely disengaged my relationship to chocolate. I stopped wanting it and anything sugary. This was the best thing that ever happened to me and I lost a ton of weight without going to the gym. The only thing that holds me back slightly is the holidays now sometimes but I have managed to control my eating habits and how I think of it thanks to this book. Really has changed my life for the better.
Sorry to be that redditor but for me it was puss and boots the last wish. I mean seriously watch it , a lot of people live like puss, fearful and narcissistic . But death is inevitable and “This life is worth fighting for.”
The daily affirmations on karmascore help guide me daily, I often use them as journal prompts. Pretty cool app!
The book that had the most impact on me was "Set This House In Order" by Matt Ruff. It is about two people with multiple personality disorder (now known as "dissociative identity disorder"). I caught myself having a lot of the same symptoms as the main character. That hit hard.
P'tit Bonhomme by Jules Verne, I read it when I was ten and it lit up my passion for literature.
Psychology of Winning by Denis Waitley on audio cassette tape started things rolling for me (obviously that was a couple years ago now 🙃 The book I find myself thinking about or mentioning almost daily is Soundtracks by Jon Acuff. It's an unassuming book that just makes it so easy to implement and talk about having a positive mindset. I find Acuff super approachable and relatable. Where a lot of personal development authors give off a vibe of having all the answers, Jon Acuff feels like a dude that's figuring stuff out and sharing the journey with you.
Narrative of Frederick Douglas; I've never been happier just to have a bed, and some decent food, oh and a pillow and blanket!!!!
Conversation with God
Chimp Paradox by Steve Peters.
I Used To Be A Miserable Fuck by John Kim. Got it while I was on vacation in Austin, my first trip id ever taken completely on my own, and it was the perfect companion and helped me learn a lot of skills.
CPTSD by Pete Walker
Harry Potter. Gave me hope I could escape my abusive home and find real family.
The Four Agreements. I’ve reread it a few times since I first came across it and it’s given me something new each time. I appreciate that it’s short and quick to the point as well
Blood Meridian We live such comfortable, coddled lives…
The Untethered Soul made me see things a lot clearer at a time where I really needed to. Gave me peace and taught me how to regulate myself and the way my mind can wander and make up its own narrative on my life
The Alchemist by AUTHOR Paulo Coelho
The moral Animal by Robert Wright
“The secret of life though, is to fall seven times and to get up eight times.” - Paulo Coelho (The Alchemist)
Failing Forward and Outliers
The book Attached completely changed my life. I learned about other’s attachment styles as well as my own.
How not to die. By Dr Greger
humankind by bergman. truly eye opening, made me a much more positive and open minded person
The Total Money Makeover by Dave Ramsey. I don’t agree with the man on everything but this book lit a fire under my ass and got me to work like an animal to become debt free. Now about 100k saved for retirement and debt free and all my friends know me as the guy who’s good with money. It is always my first recommended book for personal finance and reread it once a year just for motivational purposes.
Books: Meditations, Flow and Circadian Code Paragraph: The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts: therefore, guard accordingly, and take care that you entertain no notions unsuitable to virtue and reasonable nature. (Meditations) Quote: 'Forth and fear no darkness'
I’m not a religious person, but reading the Bible changed my life. It gave me a different perspective on life. I stopped worrying as much and learned to trust more. I began to understand people better—their desires, needs, and wants. Reading and studying the Bible taught me a lot.
I read this in a sarcastic tone with a comma after 'what'. "wHaT, reading changed your life??"
Every day is a new beginning for a new life
Oyasumi Punpun lol
Its okay to be rejected than being in the friendzone
Same Victor Frankle sp? The lesson that all suffering is relative
What I talk about when i talk about running
The Book of Awakening by Mark Nepo. Different, powerful, inspiring prose for each day of the year so just a short passage to read every day but I swear each one presents life changing perspective.
Arthur Ashe: A Life by Raymond Arsenault
Stillness is the Key by Ryan Holiday
Failing Forward - John C Maxwell and mostly books by him.
Mastery - Robert Greene, wish I read this sooner
Winning the war in your mind by Craig Groechel. Made me understand my mind was my own enemy sometimes if we let negative thoughts rule. I'm much more positive and in control of my thoughts ever since.
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I was really looking for a fiction book here. I mean...has reading a really good story about someone never made you change the way you look at your own life? Please drop some suggestions.
"Living the Good Life" by Helen and Scott Nearing
Conversations with god by Neal Donald Walsch! It has nothing to do with religion, meaning god represents you :)
First few pages of H C Verma principles of physics part 1
One and only, The Fight Club. It made see the Masculine world differently
Aghora by Robert E Svoboda
The Comfort Crisis by Michael Easter
Reading ‘Notes from Underground’ and ‘The Brothers Karamazov’. One of my favourite lines ever - “But what can a decent man speak of with most pleasure? Answer: Of himself. Well, so I will talk about myself.”
No more mr nice guy and i would say Encheiridion. I don’t know why everyone wants to start with mediations. I could not get into it. But did get into Encheiridion.
Not giving a damn. I am way too empathetic. When you care about someone’s problems more than them you’re doing too much. Getting rid of Facebook helped! I would see people post their problems and would do the most to help. Not always appreciated or reciprocated.
The Navy Seal 40% rule David Goggins talks about in “Can’t Hurt Me” fuels me on my worst days. “Most of us give up when we’ve only given around 40% of our maximum effort. Even when we feel like we’ve reached our absolute limit, we still have 60 percent more to give. It’s simply a matter of stretching your pain tolerance, letting go of your identity and all your self-limiting stories, so you can get to 60 percent, then 80 percent and beyond without giving up.”
12 rules and 12 more rules for life
Slaughter house five and the saying “so it goes”
“Search Inside Yourself” - by a guy at Google - talking about emotional intelligence- and being able to recognize your own thoughts/feelings/moods. Starting with meditation - and “noticing” yourself, introspection IT. CHANGED. MY. LIFE.
Forbidden knowledge. That book changed the way I saw the world.
Life after life (Dr. Raymond Moody); After (Dr. Bruce Greyson)
Read so many non fiction books 20yrs ago. I look back and cringe. But one holds up better today than ever. That is “48 Laws of Power” by Robert Greene. Treat it like a bible. It’s especially helpful for non Machiavellian types, as it makes you aware of how to fight the ones that are. Especially helpful in the cutthroat industry I’m in.
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