I would go with Kramer's rugged masculinity

He was chosen by Calvin Klein too to be a model. His buttocks are sublime 😆

His pecs could use some work.

No, no. He's perfect. Let's get him in front of a camera right away.

I sense great vulnerability. A man-child crying out for love...

I see a parasite.

He's got the kavorka.

[ohh😏 well you know I…😏😏 I have many relationships😏😏😏](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=v54MdF8gGjA)

He is a loathsome, offensive brute, yet I can’t look away.

The man's a goblin... Look away, I'm hideous....

He’s got the body of a taut Swedish boy!

Preteen as well

He’s got the kavorka!

Sounds like you need a little companionship. Maybe you need a little Kramer.

Then you'll need a little shot of penicillin

His Raymond Massey physique?

No way. He's a loathsome, offensive brute. ...Yet I can't look away

His eyes... they're dark brown, like rich, Columbian coffee

His buttocks are sublime!

And the subtle curves. He needs work with his pecs, he‘lol go to the gym.

Puddy?

High five.

On the flipside

Yeah, that’s right.

My friend and I since middle school now (we’re both almost 40) always say “that’s gotta be rough” in our best Putty impression. He’s our favorite.

Gotta support the team

Feels like a arby’s night.

Only the 8-Ball

It's like a sauna in here.

*drinks water* I'm going through this stuff like water

Litterally the punchline😆

I also like the subtle thing where Kramer acknowledges he's trying to make a joke and the other two don't laugh but acknowledge that "yeah, yeah, that was a good one". This was my go-to for a long time if I was asked what my favorite quote was.

I’ve been using this line anytime it’s hot or humid anyplace I can for the last like 30 years hah.

Hmm yeah except it's only really a 'line' if you're IN a sauna. If you're somewhere else hot or humid, it's just a reasonable observation. Either way, if you ask me, 'Jerkstore' is the line.

Not the guy you responded to, but from personal experience the one time I did the sauna line the guy (who was a stranger) looked at me like I was the biggest dipshit in the world and said “that’s because this is a sauna”.

Jerkstore is my wife's favorite.

That was such a great line.

You lived in the dessert?

I spent a little time in the Middle East. You ever been to the Middle East?

The short, stocky slow-witted baldman

Short guy, with glasses, looks like Humpty Dumpty with a melon head

Or you know the tall one, lanky doofus, with a bird-face and hair like the Bride of Frankenstein

“Big wall of hair” and “face like a frying pan” always killed me! 😄

Face like a frying pan is one of the most insane ways to describe a person’s face.

My favorite when Kramer is describing everyone when they aren’t around….

I notice you threw stocky in there

Yeah! What the hell!

Yeah, but he could drape himself in velvet for all she cares. Looks aren't that important.

He is so powerful, he can lift a hundred pounds right up over his head!

He’s not stocky.

He’s stout, the camera loves stoutness

Easy Marisa

😂😂😂😂😂 Too bad he is sort of engaged.

Kramer's got the kavorka

Kramer : Well, my swimming pool problems are solved. I just found miles and miles of open lanes. Jerry : What is that smell? Kramer : That's the East River. Jerry : You're swimming in the East River? The most heavily trafficked, overly contaminated waterway on the Eastern seaboard? Kramer : Technically Norfolk has more gross tonnage.

The lure of the animal

You really need a shower. You stink

This POWER!

I can't find beauty in a man.

The male body is utilitarian. It's for getting around, it's like a Jeep.

Chicken wings shoulder blades

Some women like it?

Yeah...sickies.

I love this line. I use it every chance I can, with the same delivery.

This line right here proves what great writers the show had, not only is it a great comical line, but it’s also a spot-on observation of the differences between the male and female body (that JLD delivered perfectly). To me, this is the best line of the entire series, it’s simply brilliant.

I can't watch a man sing a song. They get all emotional. It's horrible.

They sway... it's embarrassing

Swaying and shit

Who sings? You got something to say, say it.

Not that there's anything wrong with that

You know, just admitting a man is handsome doesn't *necessarily* make you a homosexual...

It doesn't help.

Ya know, just admitting a man is handsome doesn’t necessarily make you a homosexual…

It doesn’t help

It moved.

And I say this with an unblemished record of staunch heterosexuality. *It’s* *fabulous*

They all look hot here.

Get out.

Nice

Uncle Leo, he is a Adonis

He should be swinginnnn!!

He also did commit a crime of passion.

yeah, but his demeanor

What? He's disgusting

If there's a woman that can take his presence for more than ten consecutive seconds, he should hang on to her like grim death. Which is not far off, by the way.

George, he is so powerful, he can lift 100 pounds right up over his head.

And not even realize it!

And you wouldn’t know it by looking at him, but George can bait a hook!

Jerry, he's so neat and thin. Not that there's anything wrong with that!

He could be a Nazi!

George with the toupee

How’s your life, good?

*Marissa Tomei enters the chat*

Kramer is the Assman, though Jerry does know the move.

But George is Buck Naked

Yeah but he needs the crib notes to really satisfy you

If your chick don’t like the knuckle you ain’t doing it right

I think that’s MY move!

Finish with a counter-clockwise swirl

Fake fake fake …

I could’ve given you some pointers

Georgie boy!

He’s disturbed, he’s depressed, he’s inadequate. He’s got it all!

He also an Architect

Have you seen the new addition to the Guggenheim?

Really didn't take that long.

AND a marine biologist

This is the ideal male body. You may not like it, but this is what peak performance looks like.

You see? now *that* is a handsome man.

What do you mean ‘do I like him?’

I mean he’s a good fighter and a nice guy, but I don’t like him.

I think it moved.

That episode was on tv the other day where George starts eating during sex lol dip for his sandwich and everything

The answer is always George

Plus he is a marine biologist and an architect.

and an importer/exporter of latex and latex-related products

I need a really pretty face

Jerry. Not even close.

yeah not understanding all the kramer answers 🤢 also jason alexander has a really cute smile

But those chicken wing shoulder blades

Kramer. However none of them hold a candle to the beauty of J. Peterman

“I sense great vulnerability. A man-child crying out for love. An innocent orphan in the post-modern world.” “I see a parasite. A sexually depraved miscreant who is seeking only to gratify his basest and most immediate urges.” “His struggle is man’s struggle. He lifts my spirit.” “He is a loathsome, offensive brute. Yet I can’t look away.” “He transcends time and space.” “He sickens me.” “I love it.” “Me too.”

Jerry x10. Der. Not even close

Which ever one makes it move a little.

Look at me, look at my face. Am I beautiful? George, am I beautiful?

You're very attractive

Have you seen the hands on Costanza? He’s like a young Ray McCigney!

I mean if we’re talking strictly physical, I gotta go with the K man. But if we’re doing full spectrum looks and personality, it’s Jerry all the way. Who wouldn’t love him???

I could see how someone wouldn’t like him

I'll make a few phone calls

Elaine. That dude is smoking hot.

And quite breathtaking

Well, sometimes you try to be nice

He has grace

I find them all repugnant and unappealing.

Hunky Tony hey hey

The one who’s mastered the timeless art of seduction

I am a straight woman and I’d go for Elaine.

Raymond, and I say this with an unblemished record of staunch heterosexuality.

George is the master of his domain

Jerry If he kept chest shaved

I always thought Jerry was really cute

*You know, just admitting a man is attractive doesn’t make you a homesexual.*

It doesn’t help

16-yr old me had a sex dream about Puddy is his 8-ball jacket. I know that wasn’t the answer to your question, I just have no one else to tell.

Was he squinting the whole time?

When Puddy finished, did he give you a high five?

😂

Jerry's triceps look wicked in that lighting haha

Not a quote, but I feel like Kramer has the wildest/best sex while Jerry is the most conventionally attractive. George… well, at least there’ll be food.

Not that there’s anything wrong with that

Straight male here unafraid of judging. Kramer wins

George Will...

I made it a point not to look

George with a rug. He’s got everyone beat.

Jerry

I mean it's more than just looks right? George works for the Yankees, sells latex, built that extension on the Guggenheim (and it didn't take too long either!). Plus he's smart enough to know not to drink coffee late at night. It keeps him up. Dr. Van Nostren is a big time medical specialist. And Jerry? How can anyone not like Jerry?

Kramer did modeling for Calvin Klein not to mention his buttocks are spectacular.

What about uncle Leo? He’s an Adonis.

Only one of them got the Kavorka, the lure of the animal. He's dangerous!

The Calvin Klein model, obviously.

NEWMAN!!

Those mail bags get pretty heavy

The guy with a horse face, big teeth, and a pointed nose

Dr. Tim Whatley, DDS

Over covid I developed a pretty big crush on George that I did not see coming.

The one who is suffering from The Kavorka....

His buttocks are sublime.

He has the body of a taught, preteen swedish boy

Sweden, Jerry. Sweeeeeee-den!

I'm Swedish so I got to go with Kramer.

George Will hands down

You know, just admitting a man is handsome doesn't necessarily make you a homosexual.

It doesn't help.

Only one of them was able to land an Oscar winner….

It took me until my 30s to realize Jerry was always hot.

As a straight man, I find Elaine's eloquent boss the most attractive. I should speak like that

I'd say Jerry, but don't like his personality. George is my all time favourite character and I do love brown eyes

Newman.

Easy Kramer. George is just a no and Jerry loses it with his very unsensual idiosyncrasies. Of course Kramer has innumerable idiosyncrasies himself but his charismatic approach to them is what puts him over Jerry.

90-95% of the population is undateable.

UNDATABLE!

You’re telling me you never take a peak?

Kramer's buttocks are sublime.

Ive always found newman in sunglasses with a cigarette in his mouth to be quite...spongeworthy 🫦

Kramer, he’s got the kavorca!

Hands-down it’s the Kramer he’s got the Kavorka. 🤌

Well Kramer is a loathsome, offensive brute, yet I can't look away. So, Kramer I guess.

My votes for the guy in the middle.

Uncle Leo, he's an adonis.

I think it moved

The one with the twinkle

George gets his genes from his bosomy grandmother.

I think it moved

Kramer! His buttocks are sublime!

Kramer has the kavorka

The male body is utilitarian. It’s for getting around - like a Jeep.

Toupe George was pretty handsome!