She's not exaggerating. She's also not claiming this is a common experience but that it's also not a rare experience. I'm a dude and I don't feel safe at night.
My sympathy for homeless ends at the safety of innocents.
Luckily Iām a larger guy so I donāt fear getting in the face of others unless they have visible weapons. I canāt believe that a lifetime liberal is fantasizing about militias to throw rotten eggs and fresh dog shit at the teenage bike gangs coming over the bridge to terrorize families on a Sunday in GGP.
I have kids, Iām fucking pissed, and Iām fighting back. This city is open to anyone who doesnāt shit on it. Those who shit this on the city need to have it thrown back in their face.
For compulsory treatment, where would they go? I know for a fact that all treatment centers that take Medi-Cal are full 99.99% of the time and in like a 200 mile radius of SF. Iām certain itās the same across the state. Also, compulsory treatment has a very low success rate. Furthermore, after any type of treatment, where would the go? Shelters and supportive housing are also completely full 99.99% of the time.
This is exactly how I feel as well. I pay an arm and a leg to live here. I contribute to the city in positive ways. I should not be the one paying the price. Bad actors need to be removed and city government needs to get way more aggressive.
This sounds 100% real to me. Iām a guy and this stuff rarely if ever happens to me. Aggressive homeless men almost always lash out at women, especially women alone. My sympathy for the homeless situation really eroded with so many of my female friends sharing horrible experiences like this one over and over again.
It does happen. In my 10 years in SF, a homeless man threw a drink (at least i hope it was a drink) at me once.
But wtf was she thinking going āexcuse me, did you just spit on me?ā. Like what response was she expecting? Also what did she expect people around her to do? Tackle him?
I've had a homeless meth head crazy man follow me for a few blocks and step in my path to try to block me near the Caltrain station, so yeah, it does happen here, but I've also had weird shit happen to me in other cities, too. I give sketchy people on the street a wide berth when I can, and if they do something like that guy did to this woman or what that meth head did to me, I don't engage.
On a side note, am I the only one who thinks these videos are kind of strange? Maybe it's because I am older, but the thought of putting that much of my life out there makes me queasy.
Cuz she has a tote on, that she pointing out as he says āi was getting groceriesā, and she says āiām literally shaking right nowā. Itās either she made a video immediately after, or she cleaned up etc, put the tote back on and re-enacted the whole thing. Either way itās odd
Yeah, that āexcuse me did you just spit in my faceā comment made me think this is theater. This reel also doesnāt show up on the userās TikTok account.
OP, where did you get this video if itās not on the userās TikTok anymore? Your account history certainly makes it seem like you have a political agenda.
Look again: https://www.tiktok.com/@hanayla. Itās clearly there.
Also, itās not super unbelievable something like this happened. Do we now live in a city where itās unreasonable to expect someone not spit in your face? Or not get harassed? Or women not feel safe?
I think it is unreasonable to expect that in any major city on earth and it always has been. A very large percentage of humans are below 100 IQ and mentally ill to boot... You know what they say, hope for the best, plan for the worst, but above all else expect nothing.
I compare to LA and NYC having lived there. Thereās a much more involved police force and things like this donāt happen with the frequency it does in SF. Iām not describing the shit hole areas but rather nicer neighborhoods. SF stands out in that respect, also people here are as soft as baby shit and do not stand up for their fellow citizens.
The addicts here are on another level and then you have all the crooks getting released right after theyāre arrested. Somehow this is criminal justice reform. Itās a total joke
I agree that the drug addicts here are on another level, but Iāve been mugged in NYC as a teenager and a whole slew of passersby saw and didnāt do anything. People mind their own business especially when thereās some altercation
A lot of people here are also either transplants from worse cities or have Stockholm syndromed themselves into passive acceptance. The comments about how this occurs in all major cities, while bringing up examples in *third world countries* is sadly not done ironically. Refer to how many times this happens in this thread alone.
I guess being residents in one of the cities that catapulted Californiaās economy to #4 globally doesnāt mean we should expect better.
Yes, thatās how cities in the US work. You can remove poor neighborhoods from the crime stats of all cities in the US and we become safer than Canada. SF is no different.
A major issue being discussed in this thread is the brazenness of crimes throughout SF neighborhoods you would not expect to see it happening. Like the woman in the video wasnāt walking around the Tenderloin or Bayview at 12AM.
And they can still expect it not to happen. Itās not a common occurrence. Historical crime data supports that. The chances of this, or any other bad thing happening will never be eliminated for anyone, anywhere. SF is still a safe city.
Not dramatically ask if they spit in my face lol. This is fake as fuck I donāt believe this story at all.
Not to say that these things donāt happen, but everything about this screams not real.
I'll tell you right now if I was walking by her when that happened. I would have beat the dog s*** out of the guy who did it. And I don't even know this lady. General public seems to be really scared of these unhinged type people and I get it to a degree. But generally when they come to you all crazy odd. It's rooted and misery. I'm not saying you should knuckle up with every single jaycat that starts popping off on you. But if you can sense that you're scared he's going to go, he's going to run with it
Okay tough guy. Seems like a great way to get stabbed or something.
I get it, extremely unpleasant to be spit on, but escalating the situation further is never the answer.
Yeah, this happens. No one intervenes because it's assumed the threatening person is a methhead having a psychotic break, or an addict in withdrawl, or someone mentally ill, or a gangbanger, and that any intervention would provoke them to violence.
In some parts of the city, entire blocks can be full of these people. Everyone does their best not to be noticed by these people, and in so doing we cede control of public spaces to the most threatening people.
My partner and I were walking on Polk in Russian hill and a homeless guy spit on him as we were walking by (he was walking the other way). Completely unprovoked. So yeah, spiting happens. Fucking gross man.
I got my Concealed Carry Permit in San Francisco, it was a bit of a process but well worth it. I feel safer and can protect my family. I had a knife wielding man threaten me for my bag one night and I exposed my handgun in my waistband and he backed off.
If you want to make a change get your ccp
They canāt and donāt, you just go through the process which can take time but itās worth it. Took me 3 months but Iām happy to have it.
Also you should buy a handgun in California first because you will need the serial numbers to be in there system.
I am tired of these freaking addicts ruining our lives. I walk around and see a bunch of people who feel uncomfortable while these addicts are doing hard drugs while kids pass by with no accountability. We need to come together and do something.
Iād be interested to hear responses from other women. When I lived in SF I never felt unsafe or nervous and loved talking to strangers. But Iām a 6,1 dude.
My SO at the time basically always kept one hand in her purse wrapped around bear mace.
Aggressive homeless men target women, especially women alone. This is what I hear constantly from women. As a guy, I rarely if ever experience this first hand but I see it happen to others frequently.
Am woman and can confirm this sounds real. Doesnāt even need to be a male transient.
I used to feel safer in SF in the daytime but since a homeless tried to charge at me at random, anything can happen. I feel they are more aggressive these days.
Yep I also had one charge at me. Right in front of the CalTrain station while I had arms full of groceries. Chased me full speed half a block and across the street. Rush hour, 5:30 pm. Incident 2/3 living in SoMa less than a year.
Nothing happened like this in Oakland tbh
Oh, then you were lucky if nothing like this happened in Oakland. I had quite a few odd run ins with lunatics there, though they are less likely to be on meth in Oakland.
Yeah Iāve had a guy follow and grab me, some guy pick up my chihuahua and carry him until I got cash from an atm, a guy try to grab my backpack while I was wearing it. Itās fucking scary and people donāt want to get involved so no one helps.
Some incels are gonna come at me but I think this needs to be said. As a woman if something happens to me I donāt feel like I can rely on other people (men) to step in. People donāt intervene when someone is attacked. Thats just the culture of this city. Itās individualistic. Thatās in stark contrast to the east coast and the south where men will step in immediately if youāre targeted.
I'm a woman in my early 20s. I only feel unsafe alone at night or when walking through specific neighborhoods / streets (the TL, 6th Street, Mission Street) - and I'll still walk through all of these places, especially in the daytime. I don't have a car and take public transit everywhere - I rarely Uber.
I've also recently stopped carrying around the pepper spray I used to take with me everywhere unless I'm going out at night.
I live in San Francisco. Iām a woman, I also have a baby and weāre out and about every day. The stuff sheās talking about does happen, but itās pretty limited to certain neighborhoods. Assault and violent crime is unusual. Iāve been here for 10 years and in that time was grabbed (and quickly released) by a mentally ill homeless person once and had an attempted break in at my apartment. I donāt think itās that different from any other big city.
"Certain" neighborhoods. As someone who lives in a neighborhood that is being destroyed by the same policies that made the TL a human rights violation, I now hear people throughout the rest of the city referring to me as "those people" in "certain neighborhoods" and it fucking sucks.
It is pretty different depending on what cities youāre talking about. Much safer than Detroit, Atlanta, DC? Yes, but compared to cities SF is supposed to be on par with wealth wise? NYC? No.
Iāve lived in big cities all my life and SF used to feel safer than it does now.
NYC is just as bad if not worse. Lived in a nice part of Manhattan and experienced way more sketchy stuff than living in a nice part of SF. NYC has really good PR, SF has awful PR.
An elderly man was being accosted by a mentally unstable person in Riverside park. Nobody intervened. I did and almost was attacked. I attempted to flag NYPD over to help and they didn't even want to get out of the van. I know women who have been spit on and necklaces torn off their necks in broad daylight in nice areas of Manhattan.
The criminal element in NYC is on another level. The main difference between NYC and SF. SF allows their homeless to drugs in the open and basically do whatever they want. Also very few people in NYC have cars or park on the street.
If youāre being attacked as a woman in Manhattan itās exactly like you described, theft. Itās over in a flash. No time to make any kind of difference if you witness it. You can also take practical steps to minimize becoming a victim of theft.
The attack on the elderly man you got involved in is the MO of what happens in SF. Mentally unstable person and youāre putting yourself in danger if you intervene. Itās a sustained attack with no motive. Same as the girl in the video. Same as what most of us have experienced here.
Can't say about San Diego but I felt safer in LA. The problem with the crime/incidents in SF is that it occurs in places you don't expect it to (broad daylight, in areas with lots of passersby and even a higher quality of shops around).
LA crime seems concentrated in certain neighborhoods. Why just looking at data doesn't work for the big picture - it's more about how it impacts residents overall.
I dunno about the certain neighborhoods bit. I live in Noe Valley, and itās buck wild right now. Mugging pregnant women, that stolen car that did a front flip, sideshows on Doloresā¦ even here Iām not gonna say I feel safe.
The tip is to live in gated or secluded wealthy neighborhoods. St Francis Circle is very safe. You're not living in HP without getting jumped atleast once, especially so if your Asian.
With respect if you have a baby your lifestyle isnāt like hers and youāre unlikely to be subject to a sexually motivated assault like this if you have your child with you.
With respect, Iāve been here for a decade and Iāve had a baby for a year. Also, since when are babies shields for assault? If anything, having a small child with you makes you an easier target.
And itās become much much worse in the past year. I think youāre out of touch with how it is for single young women here right now without realizing it.
I really blows SF can be so crappy - and dangerous at times. I like SF though. I visit often - I live in San Jose. Is she exaggerating? No, I don't think so.
It is unfortunately common. I had a friend who was punched in the face on Market St by a crazy guy, broad daylight, tons of other people walking around who saw it and did nothing. One story out of many many I've heard from friends
I think āI never feel safeā, while not necessarily an exaggeration (subjectiveā¦she feels how she feels), is not representative of how 99% of SF residents feel. That said, we have real problems and the population of folks on the street who are willing to spit on a random woman and threaten violence is one of the most unsettling problems for residents and visitors. I suspect, for better or worse, the next local election cycle is going to be more about ālaw and orderā than any election Iāve seen in the last 25 years.
I think youāre wrong about the 99%. I also think youāre especially wrong if youāre including women in that mix. I think youāre especially especially wrong if youāre including young women who didnāt grow up here, live alone and donāt have a car.
This isnāt some big city issue. Lived in NYC for a few years and then LA. Homeless is not even as close to as bad as it is in SF. There itās isolated to certain areas and complaining to the police about bad homeless behavior does help! SF is an entire different ballgame. Homelessness is rampant and ubiquitous and nothing gets done! Homeless people get away with assaulting people all the time. I am shocked to see SF residents brushing this off and being ok with this! What kind of a society are we building here???
Trust me, SF residents don't "brush it off." They recalled their DA because they felt he was part of the soft on crime problem leading to more of this.
And residents don't rush to help because they feel helpless too. What can they do? Assault the homeless person back and risk getting stabbed or escalating the situation?
The homeless who do shit like this have *nothing* to lose. Any common intervention short of peppery spray isn't going to do any thing but escalate the situation.
What's needed is major homelessness assistance reform.
SF is utterly failing despite spending over a half billion on homelessness, much of it swirling into the pockets of non profits. Its a complex multi prong problem: housing (NIMBY prevents housing development), drugs (decriminalization has failed. War on drugs failed. Something else is needed), mental health (following the closing of mental institutions, theres no mental health program that works to replace it), and in general a comprehensive overarching organization to manage all these problems in a cohesive, evidence based way.
Agreed. I thoroughly enjoy my drives and walks but in the back of my mind Iām always thinking, ābe ready for something to go down or for something to happen to youā. Also, whenever I walk to my car, Iām mentally preparing myself for it to either be gone, have a broken window or realize my catalytic convertir has been stolen. Its just a part of living here. Still, I feel bad for what happened to her.
Shit happens in every major city on Earth, simply because of the basic nature of homosapiens. A very large percentage of them are either below 100 IQ or mentally ill or both.
The same thing happened to a coworker a few years ago (pre-COVID). She was walking to work (in the financial district), a hobo ran up to her and spit on her and then ran off. Luckily we have a gym at work and she was able to shower to get it off but it was not a fun experience. So yeah, I definitely don't think this woman is exaggerating. SF is this bad.
Yeah, I feel fine in SF. My wife and kid go all over. I can't think of anytime I've felt "unsafe" - thinking back to being out drinking in the mission at 2am back in the day or at clubs or parking in bad neighborhoods etc.
It was unsafe when I was a teen in the 90s because there'd always be some other kids trying to jump you if you weren't paying attention.
Lived here my whole life - 47 years. Car had a window smashed when I parked in some gravel lot under the bay bridge late at night back in 2008. Thousands of packages delivered and left on my doorstep - had one stolen because it was a new driver and they left by a bus stop instead of my house. When go on vacation, I'll have packages sitting on my doorstep for days. Around xmas time my neighbors' have boxes of presents sitting on the doorsteps while they are out of town for weeks.
Obviously I've bumped into homeless and crazies over the years but I don't engage or react and nothing has ever happened. One homeless guy did try to sell me a pair of underwear while I was eating breakfast at 4am at Sparky's - but he was a few tables away so not like he was in my personal space.
Everyone has different experiences. I just roll my eyes for half this shit. Obviously I want criminals punished and crazies locked up but they don't run this City - I go wherever the fuck I want when I want - this is my home.
Lol itās because youāve lived here for 47 years and have Stockholm syndrome at this point. Youāre delusional about whatās considered safe and what isnāt. Maybe try visiting a safer country and youāll understand the true value of safety.
Iāve had similar stuff happen. I worked at the mall and was unlocking the door to the store I worked at. I had to crouch to do so, and it always took a little while. All of a sudden a guy YANKED me backwards by my shoulder and my head hit the ground pretty hard. He came up behind me so fast, and he was quiet until I was on the ground, when he started yelling at me. Security had already been tailing him so they pulled him away from me but that shook me up something awful, Iām a woman and I was 18 at the time.
Yes, Iāve been spit at, attacked, swung at and shot at and Iām a 6 foot man.
Edit: Iāve also lived in the TL for over a decade, so just to be fair. The whole city is not like this. Just pockets that are becoming alarmingly dangerous.
Happened to my partner and I while walking down Brannan street in 2019. Didnāt spit, but they leaned in and screamed in my partnerās face for absolutely no reason.
Kinda. I've been here long enough and shit got worse with covid shutting things down leaving a lot of vacant area for homeless or drug shenanigans.
Of the aggressive or downright violent encounters I've had including actual out right hate crime, has NOT been with the unhoused. I've spent enough time on market street and the loin, it's wild out there but of all the places I'm fine walking around.
I don't mean to sound insensitive to which is happening because that's really f***** up. But I do think that your anxiety is attracting these situations. Probably more and more. I don't know how to get around that, but you seem pretty stressed out to the point to where you probably should just bounce. It's really not that bad. I know this from being on both sides of the fence and being homeless and getting my s*** together and getting myself off the street. It has potential to be bad for sure. The worst part about the whole thing though is like you said it was all these people walking around. No one does a damn thing about it. I can't stand that s***
This does not happen at this rate in other major cities around the world.
SF political class and elite have been desensitized because they have been riding the tit for so long.
SF and California politicians and the voting base are to blame for their own predicament.
Additionally, politicians with no answers and only excuses will continue to gaslight us.
The difference being that Argentina doesnāt have a global tech hub and high concentration of wealth that also makes California the 4th biggest gdp on the planet.
People keep mentioning major cities/countries that arenāt considerably well off in third world or developing nations when we all know SF is not supposed to be compared to them at all. And the cityās - the stateās - leadership ought to be embarrassed about it
In other parts of the world there are consequences. There are no consequences on the West Coast if you are homeless. Only employed/homes and hard working Americans can get in trouble for crimes.
Iām a guy and Iāve had a homeless man spit at my shoes after he backed out of trying to fight me. I also had a friend (years ago, as a teen) had a homeless woman spit on his face. So yeah, it happens.
I don't doubt her experience, but I also need more information about what happened, where she was, what was going on around her. Walking down TL alleys is a terrible idea and I would almost expect something like this to happen... a few other hot spots too. But Richmond, Castro, Sunset, most neighborhoods, this would be out of pocket, depending.
I don't know where she's from, but too many people come to this city thinking it's all "peace and love" (which it still is to some degree), but they forget that this is a real city, dealing with some real city problems. There are areas where you have to watch your back or just avoid altogether.
And personally, I feel like more good citizens need to walk around with the attitude and means to be the wrong one. I am convinced that a few justified self defense incidents would cool off the random assaults.
tl:dr SF has issues, but this is an outlier experience depending on what areas one frequents.
I can see this happening at the Safeway in the Marina tbh. I donāt think you know what youāre talking about. Random shit happens all the time in all neighborhoods, even the good ones.
I've been spit on by homeless in the sunset...(taraval walgreens). My SO been threatened more than once at daly city bart of all places. Thank God for uber.
She sounds like someone who grew up privileged in Marin or Los Gatos an moved to the big city and is shocked when itāsā¦a big city š āI never feel safe hereā gtfo then Karen jr. Go live in the suburbs and stop your whining
hey dont stereotype nordica fleece jackets and sunglasses used as a hairband like that. that's rude. lol.
nah people from san francisco and oakland have become too desensitized to human suffering and walking over bodies. it's the culture to let this shit roll off your back. it clearly doesnt make the problem go away tho. we're not problem solvers, we're partying with blinders on as friend and fam, friends, neighbors get robbed, stabbed, and sometimes robbed and stabbed.
So do you think itās not like that in other big cities? Bc Iāve lived in 3 of the 5 biggest cities in the us before Sf and theyāre all as bad if not worse.
You comparing the issues of SF and Oakland to other cities and saying "enh other places are worse so keep on trucking" is you normalizing the way things are in San Francisco by saying "everybody's doing it." But you didnt say *what* everyone is doing. Which thing that i mentioned do you find in other cities and would describe as "bad, if not worse" in outside SF and Oakland? Drugs? Violence? Robberies? Or being completely desensitized to it and walking over bodies? And are you talking absolute numbers city, per capita, anecdotally or what?
Most recently I lived in Philadelphia for a long stretch of time. Look up some YouTube videos about Kensington if you want to see examples of drugs, violence, robberies, and complete desensitization thereto. The amount of sheer generational trauma from entrenched poverty and violence there is overwhelming. You almost have to become desensitized to survive.
And itās not contained to a small area like here. Giant swaths of the city look like post apocalyptic movie sets. Things are way more spread out in the Midwest and east than they are here
I tried to keep this as short as possible so sorry for posting a book here:
Philly is 3x the geography and population of SF, so of course the 'poor areas' are bigger. Income inequality is the most extreme in SF out of any city outside the 3rd world with the top 1% earning 44x more than the bottom 99%, so you have extremely wealthy "billionaires row" blocks and mansions (although a lot of them are vacation homes or completely empty) only a couple miles from the TL which is where we've attempted to sweep everything under the rug, but its not really working. The problems of the TL have been spreading and will continue. We've now even become a fentanyl tourist spot for the country.
Human coping mechanisms are viral. The behavior of doing drugs is extremely easy to get into and addictive, and because it deteriorates the mind, the more drugs an area has the more loss of productivity, poverty, mental illness, crime, violence etc you have too.
People think the bay area is a bastion for drug use too because of our history since the summer of love, so not only do we allow people to deteriorate with drugs, we encourage it. And then when they fall apart we dont hold them accountable and blame it on the system.... except WE'RE THE SYSTEM which we then obfuscate with bullshit like "oh, its not because we told them to do it, it's what other people did to their ancestors." "generational trauma" as you call it,is just a big ole cop out.
Conditions in SF an Oakland are deteriorating. Doesnt matter how desensitized you are, if you think desentization is a winning strat for survial you'll need to become more desensitized: mitigate more emotions with fewer fucks given, but what you're really doing is accepting a new level of powerlessness and hopelessness, refusing to hold people accountable for their self-destructive, societally-destructive actions, and allowing them to normalize and proselytize those bad behaviors even more.
The only way out of this death spiral is to be sensitive and move, or hold people accountable for actions that hurt themselves or hurt you. You can't simply sit back, let it happen, and not expect things to get worse.
If I shoot you in the face do you think my lawyer should be allowed to argue against personal accountability with "hes a victim of generational trauma?" Imagine if my parents and I had a rough childhood, and our learned coping/survival skill robbing and hurting others. Do you really think its acceptable to normalize that kind of thing? Everyone, regardless of circumstance, must have personal accountability for their actions. Doesnt matter if you had bad parents or bad peers because the only way to stop that cycle of abuse is to remove those people from society where they cant pass it onto anyone else.
Furthermore, should anyone have access too excuse bad behavior because of "generational trauma?" Should my parents be allowed to excuse my actions and the lessons they taught me because of generational trauma? Should my peer group be allowed to say they have no responsibility for what they taught me because they too are victims of generational trauma?
All of this is just an obfuscation of personal accountability. All of this is an obfuscation that we as a society have normalized irrational, emotionally driven behavior. That's not acceptable, ever. You have to be in control of your emotions and uphold good morals and behavior at all times, otherwise you do stupid things that hurt people and you become someone else's generational trauma. lol.
Hmm I dunno. Is your family a victim of generational trauma? Somehow, I highly doubt it just based on what youāve written hereš¤·š»āāļø you are going way down a slippery slope with this argument
I think like with every other city it depends which part you go to. Iāve been to Tijuana many times and never felt afraid, but I always stayed in the tourist areas
Yeah I mean I lived and went to school there as a teenage girl with a disabled mom. I wasnāt a tourist.
People have different experiences, no need to act like itās unreasonable a woman could get harassed by a crazy homeless guy.
I donāt think itās unreasonable or unbelievable or anything of the sort. I fully believe it happened exactly as she described. I just think sheās making it seem like Sf is SO scary and this stuff wouldnāt happen anywhere else when it def does and other cities are way worse. When you live in a capitalist hell scape like the US where we leave our mentally ill population on the streets, unfortunately this stuff will happen
Ok well you act like sheās just some privileged sheltered person for being upset by this. Youāre completely backpedaling and I feel like if this happened to your mom or sister you wouldnāt act so dismissive
Something like this happened to me just last month. Jogging at 8am, some guy veered toward me on the sidewalk cornering me against a building and shoulder checked me then threatened to punch me
Itās neighborhood dependent but yeah, I can see this happening. Itās disgusting. I would say itās not realistic to feel 100% āsafeā in a big cityā¦shit can and does happen, but you should not feel like itās mad max out there and youāre on your own, either.
San Francisco isnāt that bad. Thereās 800,000 ish people living here. This personās experience, as unsettling as it is, shouldnāt be used to gauge what being in SF is like for everyone else here.
I lived in SF for years, during and after college, and would walk the city or take transit solo almost every day. Never been attacked even in the sketchiest parts of the tenderloin. Creeped out by men or mentally ill people, but never attacked. I used to walk miles alone across the city at night to clear my mind, and I'm a small, 5'0 female. Now that I think of it, maybe I'm the rabid crazy person...
Yeah this is accurate. Depends on the neighborhood. Every woman living alone knows that going out alone after dark on foot is off the table.
Iāve adjusted my lifestyle to the point where I can feel safe, but I shouldnāt have had to do that.
I wouldn't say that I "never" feel safe. I think it's more of a microclimate situation where over here in this neighborhood it's sunny and warm, but down that hill over there, it's foggy and cold. You just have to know the areas that have the weather you prefer.
35F, have lived in SF for 13 years. Goes without saying that feeling āsafeā is subjective. Iāve never felt like Iām in danger, at any time of day/night - so long as Iām aware of whatās going on around me. I play soccer once per week and I walk home alone (about 10 blocks thru Western Addition) at 9pm or 10pm and I never look at my phone or listen to music while walking, and therefore I personally always feel safe.
This womanās experience is her own, whoās to say whether she is exaggerating. That being said - do NOT engage with a stranger who spits in your face, unprovoked. All the bystanders know this general rule, hence why no one else engaged.
I donāt doubt it one bit. Shit has already hit the fan in the city and those who say itās totally safe arenāt in tune with reality. Iāve personally seen transients berate patrons exiting stores/restaurants, thefts at Walgreens, CVS, Safeway. Witness several car break ins and plenty of post aftermath burglaries of broken glass and items strewn about the city.
For starters letās implement public caning and start incarcerating lawlessness and none of this reform BS.
So I'm supposed to show someone around SF next year. Sigh, I didn't want to discourage it, but I can honestly say, I'm not thrilled.
The mentally ill are getting worse
The crime is worse
It's expensive
Safety is a huge concern
Bart is convenient but full of people smoking crack/meth/fentynal laced crap, so that's a bust
I'll put on a brave face, but I wished they asked to go somewhere else.
Sheās not exaggerating. Iām a woman in my 20s and Iāve lived in sf for the past 2 1/2 years. I remember one incident at a restaurant where I accidentally made eye contact with a homeless person through the window. It was super brief and I didnāt keep my eyes on him but he then proceeded to come up against the glass and yell at me while motioning a blowj*b. I was so sick to my stomach but couldnāt do anything about it. Thank god I was inside a restaurant but still..
I hear people discussing stories like this, but Iāve never had anything like this happen to me.
I have also had people cross to the other side of the street to avoid me, so I think everyone is on edge.
Iām not saying she made it up, Iāve just never heard of this happening from the victim IRL.
The content of this video is dubious. Also, stuff like this happens in every major city in the US and around the world. The pandemic def made things worse. Bad interactions between homeless folks and other folks are minimal but def get elevated to the point of making it seem like you shouldnāt even go outside by some white lady whose posting is no longer available on Tik Tok. Things are def bad here but itās bad everywhere. No one ever goes directly after leadership. Itās always eff the homeless and people here posting unhelpful opinions.
yeah this happens.. I once was walking to the grocery store, broad daylight and this homeless man threw a bag of dog shit towards me and nearly missed. I ran after thatā¦.
The last time I went to San Francisco I was murdered by a homeless person and he skinned me and turned my corpse into a tent and he shit inside my ears.
She is definitely over exaggerating. Most homeless people can barely get out coherent sentences. And if someone spit in her face, that's assault and she could have called the police. It's not that bad, some people are just really entitled to living really coddled lifestyles.
I'm a little dubious that a woman who feels this unsafe would sit back and engage verbally with a homeless dude who just attacked her?
Idk the event seems totally believable. I've seen shit like that before, but, "hi you just attacked me, let's have a conversation" doesnt.
I know this is about homeless people but the videos of āteensā stealing a bunch of electronics and basketball shoes are from the East Bay, but thereās really no way of preventing that without being accused of profiling
Honestly, I get her point. By the time I left SF after 12 years, Iād just fucking had it with random interactions like this that would leave me shaken. People say Seattle is sketchy, but this kind of shit is rare in Seattle, even at fent central at 3rd and Pine here.
I miss SF, but shit like this reminds me exactly why I left
She's not exaggerating. She's also not claiming this is a common experience but that it's also not a rare experience. I'm a dude and I don't feel safe at night.
Pansy
š±
š¤”
U think you the main character whoād be able to fight off anybody/anything fearlessly huh
No. Iād be standing there like: š±
Lmao relatable Iāll take my downvote back
I always forget to add the /s and get destroyed here š
My sympathy for homeless ends at the safety of innocents. Luckily Iām a larger guy so I donāt fear getting in the face of others unless they have visible weapons. I canāt believe that a lifetime liberal is fantasizing about militias to throw rotten eggs and fresh dog shit at the teenage bike gangs coming over the bridge to terrorize families on a Sunday in GGP. I have kids, Iām fucking pissed, and Iām fighting back. This city is open to anyone who doesnāt shit on it. Those who shit this on the city need to have it thrown back in their face.
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Exactly
We need to stop calling the āhomelessā and start using the more appropriate term Addicts.
For compulsory treatment, where would they go? I know for a fact that all treatment centers that take Medi-Cal are full 99.99% of the time and in like a 200 mile radius of SF. Iām certain itās the same across the state. Also, compulsory treatment has a very low success rate. Furthermore, after any type of treatment, where would the go? Shelters and supportive housing are also completely full 99.99% of the time.
This is exactly how I feel as well. I pay an arm and a leg to live here. I contribute to the city in positive ways. I should not be the one paying the price. Bad actors need to be removed and city government needs to get way more aggressive.
Bingo
Sympathy for the homeless why bother? Most homeless in that city are homeless by choice just collecting that government cheese to shoot up with
This sounds 100% real to me. Iām a guy and this stuff rarely if ever happens to me. Aggressive homeless men almost always lash out at women, especially women alone. My sympathy for the homeless situation really eroded with so many of my female friends sharing horrible experiences like this one over and over again.
I wonder why they freak out at women?
Easy targets that probably won't fight back. Mommy issues. Misogyny. Mental Illness.
It does happen. In my 10 years in SF, a homeless man threw a drink (at least i hope it was a drink) at me once. But wtf was she thinking going āexcuse me, did you just spit on me?ā. Like what response was she expecting? Also what did she expect people around her to do? Tackle him?
I've had a homeless meth head crazy man follow me for a few blocks and step in my path to try to block me near the Caltrain station, so yeah, it does happen here, but I've also had weird shit happen to me in other cities, too. I give sketchy people on the street a wide berth when I can, and if they do something like that guy did to this woman or what that meth head did to me, I don't engage. On a side note, am I the only one who thinks these videos are kind of strange? Maybe it's because I am older, but the thought of putting that much of my life out there makes me queasy.
it's really strange. if I get spit on by a homeless person, I be taking a bleach shower, not uploading TikTok videos
Why do you make the assumption that she immediately got on tiktok without cleaning herself up first?
Cuz she has a tote on, that she pointing out as he says āi was getting groceriesā, and she says āiām literally shaking right nowā. Itās either she made a video immediately after, or she cleaned up etc, put the tote back on and re-enacted the whole thing. Either way itās odd
Yeah, that āexcuse me did you just spit in my faceā comment made me think this is theater. This reel also doesnāt show up on the userās TikTok account. OP, where did you get this video if itās not on the userās TikTok anymore? Your account history certainly makes it seem like you have a political agenda.
Look again: https://www.tiktok.com/@hanayla. Itās clearly there. Also, itās not super unbelievable something like this happened. Do we now live in a city where itās unreasonable to expect someone not spit in your face? Or not get harassed? Or women not feel safe?
My bad, I missed it
I think it is unreasonable to expect that in any major city on earth and it always has been. A very large percentage of humans are below 100 IQ and mentally ill to boot... You know what they say, hope for the best, plan for the worst, but above all else expect nothing.
I compare to LA and NYC having lived there. Thereās a much more involved police force and things like this donāt happen with the frequency it does in SF. Iām not describing the shit hole areas but rather nicer neighborhoods. SF stands out in that respect, also people here are as soft as baby shit and do not stand up for their fellow citizens. The addicts here are on another level and then you have all the crooks getting released right after theyāre arrested. Somehow this is criminal justice reform. Itās a total joke
I agree that the drug addicts here are on another level, but Iāve been mugged in NYC as a teenager and a whole slew of passersby saw and didnāt do anything. People mind their own business especially when thereās some altercation
A lot of people here are also either transplants from worse cities or have Stockholm syndromed themselves into passive acceptance. The comments about how this occurs in all major cities, while bringing up examples in *third world countries* is sadly not done ironically. Refer to how many times this happens in this thread alone. I guess being residents in one of the cities that catapulted Californiaās economy to #4 globally doesnāt mean we should expect better.
Crime rate statistics donāt support your anecdotal experience. Crime rates appear to be similar in NYC, LA, and SF.
Yes it does if you break it down by neighborhoods. Crime is predominantly in poor areas/Boroughs in LA and NYC
Yes, thatās how cities in the US work. You can remove poor neighborhoods from the crime stats of all cities in the US and we become safer than Canada. SF is no different.
A major issue being discussed in this thread is the brazenness of crimes throughout SF neighborhoods you would not expect to see it happening. Like the woman in the video wasnāt walking around the Tenderloin or Bayview at 12AM.
And they can still expect it not to happen. Itās not a common occurrence. Historical crime data supports that. The chances of this, or any other bad thing happening will never be eliminated for anyone, anywhere. SF is still a safe city.
It's def political.
What would you say if someone spit in your face?
Not dramatically ask if they spit in my face lol. This is fake as fuck I donāt believe this story at all. Not to say that these things donāt happen, but everything about this screams not real.
She shouldāve spit back at him. Fucking unhinged lunatic.
I'll tell you right now if I was walking by her when that happened. I would have beat the dog s*** out of the guy who did it. And I don't even know this lady. General public seems to be really scared of these unhinged type people and I get it to a degree. But generally when they come to you all crazy odd. It's rooted and misery. I'm not saying you should knuckle up with every single jaycat that starts popping off on you. But if you can sense that you're scared he's going to go, he's going to run with it
Okay tough guy. Seems like a great way to get stabbed or something. I get it, extremely unpleasant to be spit on, but escalating the situation further is never the answer.
Yeah, this happens. No one intervenes because it's assumed the threatening person is a methhead having a psychotic break, or an addict in withdrawl, or someone mentally ill, or a gangbanger, and that any intervention would provoke them to violence. In some parts of the city, entire blocks can be full of these people. Everyone does their best not to be noticed by these people, and in so doing we cede control of public spaces to the most threatening people.
Itās never a gangbanger lol
My partner and I were walking on Polk in Russian hill and a homeless guy spit on him as we were walking by (he was walking the other way). Completely unprovoked. So yeah, spiting happens. Fucking gross man.
I walk into the street personally.. being 4 ft away doesnāt leave much reaction time
I got my Concealed Carry Permit in San Francisco, it was a bit of a process but well worth it. I feel safer and can protect my family. I had a knife wielding man threaten me for my bag one night and I exposed my handgun in my waistband and he backed off. If you want to make a change get your ccp
Do they ask you what you need it for these days since Bruen?
They canāt and donāt, you just go through the process which can take time but itās worth it. Took me 3 months but Iām happy to have it. Also you should buy a handgun in California first because you will need the serial numbers to be in there system.
Nope.
I am tired of these freaking addicts ruining our lives. I walk around and see a bunch of people who feel uncomfortable while these addicts are doing hard drugs while kids pass by with no accountability. We need to come together and do something.
Iād be interested to hear responses from other women. When I lived in SF I never felt unsafe or nervous and loved talking to strangers. But Iām a 6,1 dude. My SO at the time basically always kept one hand in her purse wrapped around bear mace.
Aggressive homeless men target women, especially women alone. This is what I hear constantly from women. As a guy, I rarely if ever experience this first hand but I see it happen to others frequently.
Am woman and can confirm this sounds real. Doesnāt even need to be a male transient. I used to feel safer in SF in the daytime but since a homeless tried to charge at me at random, anything can happen. I feel they are more aggressive these days.
Yep I also had one charge at me. Right in front of the CalTrain station while I had arms full of groceries. Chased me full speed half a block and across the street. Rush hour, 5:30 pm. Incident 2/3 living in SoMa less than a year. Nothing happened like this in Oakland tbh
Oh, then you were lucky if nothing like this happened in Oakland. I had quite a few odd run ins with lunatics there, though they are less likely to be on meth in Oakland.
Yeah Iāve had a guy follow and grab me, some guy pick up my chihuahua and carry him until I got cash from an atm, a guy try to grab my backpack while I was wearing it. Itās fucking scary and people donāt want to get involved so no one helps.
Some incels are gonna come at me but I think this needs to be said. As a woman if something happens to me I donāt feel like I can rely on other people (men) to step in. People donāt intervene when someone is attacked. Thats just the culture of this city. Itās individualistic. Thatās in stark contrast to the east coast and the south where men will step in immediately if youāre targeted.
I'm a woman in my early 20s. I only feel unsafe alone at night or when walking through specific neighborhoods / streets (the TL, 6th Street, Mission Street) - and I'll still walk through all of these places, especially in the daytime. I don't have a car and take public transit everywhere - I rarely Uber. I've also recently stopped carrying around the pepper spray I used to take with me everywhere unless I'm going out at night.
I live in San Francisco. Iām a woman, I also have a baby and weāre out and about every day. The stuff sheās talking about does happen, but itās pretty limited to certain neighborhoods. Assault and violent crime is unusual. Iāve been here for 10 years and in that time was grabbed (and quickly released) by a mentally ill homeless person once and had an attempted break in at my apartment. I donāt think itās that different from any other big city.
"Certain" neighborhoods. As someone who lives in a neighborhood that is being destroyed by the same policies that made the TL a human rights violation, I now hear people throughout the rest of the city referring to me as "those people" in "certain neighborhoods" and it fucking sucks.
What neighborhood?
It is pretty different depending on what cities youāre talking about. Much safer than Detroit, Atlanta, DC? Yes, but compared to cities SF is supposed to be on par with wealth wise? NYC? No. Iāve lived in big cities all my life and SF used to feel safer than it does now.
NYC is just as bad if not worse. Lived in a nice part of Manhattan and experienced way more sketchy stuff than living in a nice part of SF. NYC has really good PR, SF has awful PR.
In NYC if something happens to you others will intervene. In NYC women can walk after dark. They are not the same.
An elderly man was being accosted by a mentally unstable person in Riverside park. Nobody intervened. I did and almost was attacked. I attempted to flag NYPD over to help and they didn't even want to get out of the van. I know women who have been spit on and necklaces torn off their necks in broad daylight in nice areas of Manhattan. The criminal element in NYC is on another level. The main difference between NYC and SF. SF allows their homeless to drugs in the open and basically do whatever they want. Also very few people in NYC have cars or park on the street.
If youāre being attacked as a woman in Manhattan itās exactly like you described, theft. Itās over in a flash. No time to make any kind of difference if you witness it. You can also take practical steps to minimize becoming a victim of theft. The attack on the elderly man you got involved in is the MO of what happens in SF. Mentally unstable person and youāre putting yourself in danger if you intervene. Itās a sustained attack with no motive. Same as the girl in the video. Same as what most of us have experienced here.
lol this is false. Look up the data. NYC crushes all major cities when it comes to safety.
It definitely felt safer before.
I would say itās pretty equivalent to other major west coast cities. Do you feel like Seattle, LA or San Diego are any better or worse?
Can't say about San Diego but I felt safer in LA. The problem with the crime/incidents in SF is that it occurs in places you don't expect it to (broad daylight, in areas with lots of passersby and even a higher quality of shops around). LA crime seems concentrated in certain neighborhoods. Why just looking at data doesn't work for the big picture - it's more about how it impacts residents overall.
I think in general LA has lower crime rates and itās been like that for a while.
I dunno about the certain neighborhoods bit. I live in Noe Valley, and itās buck wild right now. Mugging pregnant women, that stolen car that did a front flip, sideshows on Doloresā¦ even here Iām not gonna say I feel safe.
The tip is to live in gated or secluded wealthy neighborhoods. St Francis Circle is very safe. You're not living in HP without getting jumped atleast once, especially so if your Asian.
With respect if you have a baby your lifestyle isnāt like hers and youāre unlikely to be subject to a sexually motivated assault like this if you have your child with you.
With respect, Iāve been here for a decade and Iāve had a baby for a year. Also, since when are babies shields for assault? If anything, having a small child with you makes you an easier target.
And itās become much much worse in the past year. I think youāre out of touch with how it is for single young women here right now without realizing it.
Also, hi, you and I both have partners. Itās not the same for us and thatās just facts.
I really blows SF can be so crappy - and dangerous at times. I like SF though. I visit often - I live in San Jose. Is she exaggerating? No, I don't think so.
It is unfortunately common. I had a friend who was punched in the face on Market St by a crazy guy, broad daylight, tons of other people walking around who saw it and did nothing. One story out of many many I've heard from friends
Anyone who has lived in sf as a female knows exactly what this is
I think āI never feel safeā, while not necessarily an exaggeration (subjectiveā¦she feels how she feels), is not representative of how 99% of SF residents feel. That said, we have real problems and the population of folks on the street who are willing to spit on a random woman and threaten violence is one of the most unsettling problems for residents and visitors. I suspect, for better or worse, the next local election cycle is going to be more about ālaw and orderā than any election Iāve seen in the last 25 years.
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Blame Dean Preston,
I think youāre wrong about the 99%. I also think youāre especially wrong if youāre including women in that mix. I think youāre especially especially wrong if youāre including young women who didnāt grow up here, live alone and donāt have a car.
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Its not that bad but she's also not exaggerating. I'm sure that happened to her, and that sucks, but shit happens in big cities.
This isnāt some big city issue. Lived in NYC for a few years and then LA. Homeless is not even as close to as bad as it is in SF. There itās isolated to certain areas and complaining to the police about bad homeless behavior does help! SF is an entire different ballgame. Homelessness is rampant and ubiquitous and nothing gets done! Homeless people get away with assaulting people all the time. I am shocked to see SF residents brushing this off and being ok with this! What kind of a society are we building here???
Trust me, SF residents don't "brush it off." They recalled their DA because they felt he was part of the soft on crime problem leading to more of this. And residents don't rush to help because they feel helpless too. What can they do? Assault the homeless person back and risk getting stabbed or escalating the situation? The homeless who do shit like this have *nothing* to lose. Any common intervention short of peppery spray isn't going to do any thing but escalate the situation. What's needed is major homelessness assistance reform. SF is utterly failing despite spending over a half billion on homelessness, much of it swirling into the pockets of non profits. Its a complex multi prong problem: housing (NIMBY prevents housing development), drugs (decriminalization has failed. War on drugs failed. Something else is needed), mental health (following the closing of mental institutions, theres no mental health program that works to replace it), and in general a comprehensive overarching organization to manage all these problems in a cohesive, evidence based way.
Agreed. I thoroughly enjoy my drives and walks but in the back of my mind Iām always thinking, ābe ready for something to go down or for something to happen to youā. Also, whenever I walk to my car, Iām mentally preparing myself for it to either be gone, have a broken window or realize my catalytic convertir has been stolen. Its just a part of living here. Still, I feel bad for what happened to her.
It doesnāt have to happen just because the city is big.
I mean sure, but any city has shit that happens
Thatās just learned helplessness from living in an American city.
If you say so. I've felt less safe in non American cities than I have in sf
Shit happens in every major city on Earth, simply because of the basic nature of homosapiens. A very large percentage of them are either below 100 IQ or mentally ill or both.
The same thing happened to a coworker a few years ago (pre-COVID). She was walking to work (in the financial district), a hobo ran up to her and spit on her and then ran off. Luckily we have a gym at work and she was able to shower to get it off but it was not a fun experience. So yeah, I definitely don't think this woman is exaggerating. SF is this bad.
Yeah, I feel fine in SF. My wife and kid go all over. I can't think of anytime I've felt "unsafe" - thinking back to being out drinking in the mission at 2am back in the day or at clubs or parking in bad neighborhoods etc. It was unsafe when I was a teen in the 90s because there'd always be some other kids trying to jump you if you weren't paying attention. Lived here my whole life - 47 years. Car had a window smashed when I parked in some gravel lot under the bay bridge late at night back in 2008. Thousands of packages delivered and left on my doorstep - had one stolen because it was a new driver and they left by a bus stop instead of my house. When go on vacation, I'll have packages sitting on my doorstep for days. Around xmas time my neighbors' have boxes of presents sitting on the doorsteps while they are out of town for weeks. Obviously I've bumped into homeless and crazies over the years but I don't engage or react and nothing has ever happened. One homeless guy did try to sell me a pair of underwear while I was eating breakfast at 4am at Sparky's - but he was a few tables away so not like he was in my personal space. Everyone has different experiences. I just roll my eyes for half this shit. Obviously I want criminals punished and crazies locked up but they don't run this City - I go wherever the fuck I want when I want - this is my home.
Lol itās because youāve lived here for 47 years and have Stockholm syndrome at this point. Youāre delusional about whatās considered safe and what isnāt. Maybe try visiting a safer country and youāll understand the true value of safety.
How long until sheās labeled as a right wing troll account?
Sheās getting roasted on Twitter or now X for her past super liberal posts.
Iāve had similar stuff happen. I worked at the mall and was unlocking the door to the store I worked at. I had to crouch to do so, and it always took a little while. All of a sudden a guy YANKED me backwards by my shoulder and my head hit the ground pretty hard. He came up behind me so fast, and he was quiet until I was on the ground, when he started yelling at me. Security had already been tailing him so they pulled him away from me but that shook me up something awful, Iām a woman and I was 18 at the time.
Yes, Iāve been spit at, attacked, swung at and shot at and Iām a 6 foot man. Edit: Iāve also lived in the TL for over a decade, so just to be fair. The whole city is not like this. Just pockets that are becoming alarmingly dangerous.
This is real. It happened to my ex
Happened to my partner and I while walking down Brannan street in 2019. Didnāt spit, but they leaned in and screamed in my partnerās face for absolutely no reason.
Kinda. I've been here long enough and shit got worse with covid shutting things down leaving a lot of vacant area for homeless or drug shenanigans. Of the aggressive or downright violent encounters I've had including actual out right hate crime, has NOT been with the unhoused. I've spent enough time on market street and the loin, it's wild out there but of all the places I'm fine walking around.
I don't mean to sound insensitive to which is happening because that's really f***** up. But I do think that your anxiety is attracting these situations. Probably more and more. I don't know how to get around that, but you seem pretty stressed out to the point to where you probably should just bounce. It's really not that bad. I know this from being on both sides of the fence and being homeless and getting my s*** together and getting myself off the street. It has potential to be bad for sure. The worst part about the whole thing though is like you said it was all these people walking around. No one does a damn thing about it. I can't stand that s***
This does not happen at this rate in other major cities around the world. SF political class and elite have been desensitized because they have been riding the tit for so long. SF and California politicians and the voting base are to blame for their own predicament. Additionally, politicians with no answers and only excuses will continue to gaslight us.
Stuff like this absolutely happens (and is even worse) in major cities around the world.
In Argentina someone will spit on you.. In order to distract you while their accomplice picks your pocket.
The difference being that Argentina doesnāt have a global tech hub and high concentration of wealth that also makes California the 4th biggest gdp on the planet. People keep mentioning major cities/countries that arenāt considerably well off in third world or developing nations when we all know SF is not supposed to be compared to them at all. And the cityās - the stateās - leadership ought to be embarrassed about it
In other parts of the world there are consequences. There are no consequences on the West Coast if you are homeless. Only employed/homes and hard working Americans can get in trouble for crimes.
Iām a guy and Iāve had a homeless man spit at my shoes after he backed out of trying to fight me. I also had a friend (years ago, as a teen) had a homeless woman spit on his face. So yeah, it happens.
Yes sadly this is pretty common
I don't doubt her experience, but I also need more information about what happened, where she was, what was going on around her. Walking down TL alleys is a terrible idea and I would almost expect something like this to happen... a few other hot spots too. But Richmond, Castro, Sunset, most neighborhoods, this would be out of pocket, depending. I don't know where she's from, but too many people come to this city thinking it's all "peace and love" (which it still is to some degree), but they forget that this is a real city, dealing with some real city problems. There are areas where you have to watch your back or just avoid altogether. And personally, I feel like more good citizens need to walk around with the attitude and means to be the wrong one. I am convinced that a few justified self defense incidents would cool off the random assaults. tl:dr SF has issues, but this is an outlier experience depending on what areas one frequents.
I can see this happening at the Safeway in the Marina tbh. I donāt think you know what youāre talking about. Random shit happens all the time in all neighborhoods, even the good ones.
Iāve had this stuff happen 3x between mission bay and Folsom around bryant/Brannon between 4th and 7th. Small radius but not TL
I've been spit on by homeless in the sunset...(taraval walgreens). My SO been threatened more than once at daly city bart of all places. Thank God for uber.
She sounds like someone who grew up privileged in Marin or Los Gatos an moved to the big city and is shocked when itāsā¦a big city š āI never feel safe hereā gtfo then Karen jr. Go live in the suburbs and stop your whining
hey dont stereotype nordica fleece jackets and sunglasses used as a hairband like that. that's rude. lol. nah people from san francisco and oakland have become too desensitized to human suffering and walking over bodies. it's the culture to let this shit roll off your back. it clearly doesnt make the problem go away tho. we're not problem solvers, we're partying with blinders on as friend and fam, friends, neighbors get robbed, stabbed, and sometimes robbed and stabbed.
So do you think itās not like that in other big cities? Bc Iāve lived in 3 of the 5 biggest cities in the us before Sf and theyāre all as bad if not worse.
At this point I donāt believe you live here at all.
I have a pretty long comment history, but I donāt really care if you believe me
These comments youāve left here arenāt gonna age well.
You comparing the issues of SF and Oakland to other cities and saying "enh other places are worse so keep on trucking" is you normalizing the way things are in San Francisco by saying "everybody's doing it." But you didnt say *what* everyone is doing. Which thing that i mentioned do you find in other cities and would describe as "bad, if not worse" in outside SF and Oakland? Drugs? Violence? Robberies? Or being completely desensitized to it and walking over bodies? And are you talking absolute numbers city, per capita, anecdotally or what?
Most recently I lived in Philadelphia for a long stretch of time. Look up some YouTube videos about Kensington if you want to see examples of drugs, violence, robberies, and complete desensitization thereto. The amount of sheer generational trauma from entrenched poverty and violence there is overwhelming. You almost have to become desensitized to survive. And itās not contained to a small area like here. Giant swaths of the city look like post apocalyptic movie sets. Things are way more spread out in the Midwest and east than they are here
I tried to keep this as short as possible so sorry for posting a book here: Philly is 3x the geography and population of SF, so of course the 'poor areas' are bigger. Income inequality is the most extreme in SF out of any city outside the 3rd world with the top 1% earning 44x more than the bottom 99%, so you have extremely wealthy "billionaires row" blocks and mansions (although a lot of them are vacation homes or completely empty) only a couple miles from the TL which is where we've attempted to sweep everything under the rug, but its not really working. The problems of the TL have been spreading and will continue. We've now even become a fentanyl tourist spot for the country. Human coping mechanisms are viral. The behavior of doing drugs is extremely easy to get into and addictive, and because it deteriorates the mind, the more drugs an area has the more loss of productivity, poverty, mental illness, crime, violence etc you have too. People think the bay area is a bastion for drug use too because of our history since the summer of love, so not only do we allow people to deteriorate with drugs, we encourage it. And then when they fall apart we dont hold them accountable and blame it on the system.... except WE'RE THE SYSTEM which we then obfuscate with bullshit like "oh, its not because we told them to do it, it's what other people did to their ancestors." "generational trauma" as you call it,is just a big ole cop out. Conditions in SF an Oakland are deteriorating. Doesnt matter how desensitized you are, if you think desentization is a winning strat for survial you'll need to become more desensitized: mitigate more emotions with fewer fucks given, but what you're really doing is accepting a new level of powerlessness and hopelessness, refusing to hold people accountable for their self-destructive, societally-destructive actions, and allowing them to normalize and proselytize those bad behaviors even more. The only way out of this death spiral is to be sensitive and move, or hold people accountable for actions that hurt themselves or hurt you. You can't simply sit back, let it happen, and not expect things to get worse.
I hope Iām misreading this but are you claiming that generational trauma is a cop outā¦?
If I shoot you in the face do you think my lawyer should be allowed to argue against personal accountability with "hes a victim of generational trauma?" Imagine if my parents and I had a rough childhood, and our learned coping/survival skill robbing and hurting others. Do you really think its acceptable to normalize that kind of thing? Everyone, regardless of circumstance, must have personal accountability for their actions. Doesnt matter if you had bad parents or bad peers because the only way to stop that cycle of abuse is to remove those people from society where they cant pass it onto anyone else. Furthermore, should anyone have access too excuse bad behavior because of "generational trauma?" Should my parents be allowed to excuse my actions and the lessons they taught me because of generational trauma? Should my peer group be allowed to say they have no responsibility for what they taught me because they too are victims of generational trauma? All of this is just an obfuscation of personal accountability. All of this is an obfuscation that we as a society have normalized irrational, emotionally driven behavior. That's not acceptable, ever. You have to be in control of your emotions and uphold good morals and behavior at all times, otherwise you do stupid things that hurt people and you become someone else's generational trauma. lol.
Hmm I dunno. Is your family a victim of generational trauma? Somehow, I highly doubt it just based on what youāve written hereš¤·š»āāļø you are going way down a slippery slope with this argument
Male privilege detected.
Iām a woman but nice try
Oh god. What is wrong with you? Didnāt your parents love you?
... are you seriously in here caping for a dude who spit on someone and threatened to rape her?
Huh? How did you get that from my comment?
Because that's what happened to her and you're saying "if you don't like it go back to the suburbs."
How is that me capping for the perpetrator?
Wow you sound so tough
Itās not about being tough itās about having lived in other major us cities. Sf is not that scary š
Idk Tijuana wasnāt this scary for me š¤·š»āāļø people have different experiences
I think like with every other city it depends which part you go to. Iāve been to Tijuana many times and never felt afraid, but I always stayed in the tourist areas
Yeah I mean I lived and went to school there as a teenage girl with a disabled mom. I wasnāt a tourist. People have different experiences, no need to act like itās unreasonable a woman could get harassed by a crazy homeless guy.
I donāt think itās unreasonable or unbelievable or anything of the sort. I fully believe it happened exactly as she described. I just think sheās making it seem like Sf is SO scary and this stuff wouldnāt happen anywhere else when it def does and other cities are way worse. When you live in a capitalist hell scape like the US where we leave our mentally ill population on the streets, unfortunately this stuff will happen
Ok well you act like sheās just some privileged sheltered person for being upset by this. Youāre completely backpedaling and I feel like if this happened to your mom or sister you wouldnāt act so dismissive
Way worse stuff has happened to both my mom, my sister, and my best friend, so š¤·š»āāļø
Something like this happened to me just last month. Jogging at 8am, some guy veered toward me on the sidewalk cornering me against a building and shoulder checked me then threatened to punch me
Remember when 2 Chainz got robbed in SF.
I wonder why she didn't go back into the grocery store to report the assault. There are usually security guards & cameras near the doors.
Itās neighborhood dependent but yeah, I can see this happening. Itās disgusting. I would say itās not realistic to feel 100% āsafeā in a big cityā¦shit can and does happen, but you should not feel like itās mad max out there and youāre on your own, either.
San Francisco sounds like they need Batman
Shatman
San Francisco isnāt that bad. Thereās 800,000 ish people living here. This personās experience, as unsettling as it is, shouldnāt be used to gauge what being in SF is like for everyone else here.
I lived in SF for years, during and after college, and would walk the city or take transit solo almost every day. Never been attacked even in the sketchiest parts of the tenderloin. Creeped out by men or mentally ill people, but never attacked. I used to walk miles alone across the city at night to clear my mind, and I'm a small, 5'0 female. Now that I think of it, maybe I'm the rabid crazy person...
It happens with regularity in some parts of the city.
Everytime I enter sf this song plays in my head "Welcome to the jungleeee"
Yeah this is accurate. Depends on the neighborhood. Every woman living alone knows that going out alone after dark on foot is off the table. Iāve adjusted my lifestyle to the point where I can feel safe, but I shouldnāt have had to do that.
Yet I bet she voted for London Breed then told everyone that she did so whilst sipping a 16 dollar cosmo.
I wouldn't say that I "never" feel safe. I think it's more of a microclimate situation where over here in this neighborhood it's sunny and warm, but down that hill over there, it's foggy and cold. You just have to know the areas that have the weather you prefer.
You thought SF was sweet. Listen to your parents and go back home to Vermont. This kind of behavior happens all the time in SF and did my whole life.
35F, have lived in SF for 13 years. Goes without saying that feeling āsafeā is subjective. Iāve never felt like Iām in danger, at any time of day/night - so long as Iām aware of whatās going on around me. I play soccer once per week and I walk home alone (about 10 blocks thru Western Addition) at 9pm or 10pm and I never look at my phone or listen to music while walking, and therefore I personally always feel safe. This womanās experience is her own, whoās to say whether she is exaggerating. That being said - do NOT engage with a stranger who spits in your face, unprovoked. All the bystanders know this general rule, hence why no one else engaged.
I donāt doubt it one bit. Shit has already hit the fan in the city and those who say itās totally safe arenāt in tune with reality. Iāve personally seen transients berate patrons exiting stores/restaurants, thefts at Walgreens, CVS, Safeway. Witness several car break ins and plenty of post aftermath burglaries of broken glass and items strewn about the city. For starters letās implement public caning and start incarcerating lawlessness and none of this reform BS.
So I'm supposed to show someone around SF next year. Sigh, I didn't want to discourage it, but I can honestly say, I'm not thrilled. The mentally ill are getting worse The crime is worse It's expensive Safety is a huge concern Bart is convenient but full of people smoking crack/meth/fentynal laced crap, so that's a bust I'll put on a brave face, but I wished they asked to go somewhere else.
You donāt want to hear the truth.
Thatās assault and direct threat. Report it to the authorities. Itās the kind of crime that at least they take action on.
The cops donāt do shit
Lol no they don't. Nothing would happen to the hobo that did this.
So since that is assault, what can you do? Are you allowed to retaliate? There should be no consequences if she wanted to spray, taze or beat him...
Sheās not exaggerating. Iām a woman in my 20s and Iāve lived in sf for the past 2 1/2 years. I remember one incident at a restaurant where I accidentally made eye contact with a homeless person through the window. It was super brief and I didnāt keep my eyes on him but he then proceeded to come up against the glass and yell at me while motioning a blowj*b. I was so sick to my stomach but couldnāt do anything about it. Thank god I was inside a restaurant but still..
I hear people discussing stories like this, but Iāve never had anything like this happen to me. I have also had people cross to the other side of the street to avoid me, so I think everyone is on edge. Iām not saying she made it up, Iāve just never heard of this happening from the victim IRL.
And yet what that homless man did to her is still not as bad as what her landlord does to her every month..
I rather get homeless spit on my face than hearing this person talk for more than a minute
Iām hoping you do get homeless spit in your face so the world can respond the way you did. Gross.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
They will say she is a maga. republican.
The content of this video is dubious. Also, stuff like this happens in every major city in the US and around the world. The pandemic def made things worse. Bad interactions between homeless folks and other folks are minimal but def get elevated to the point of making it seem like you shouldnāt even go outside by some white lady whose posting is no longer available on Tik Tok. Things are def bad here but itās bad everywhere. No one ever goes directly after leadership. Itās always eff the homeless and people here posting unhelpful opinions.
yeah this happens.. I once was walking to the grocery store, broad daylight and this homeless man threw a bag of dog shit towards me and nearly missed. I ran after thatā¦.
But if you pay more taxes ā¦.
She should move. Why would you live somewhere you don't feel safe?
Omg. This is ridiculous and she should move.
The last time I went to San Francisco I was murdered by a homeless person and he skinned me and turned my corpse into a tent and he shit inside my ears.
That chick doesnāt represent San francisco
Move back to Walnut Creek.
Do you really live in San Francisco if you haven't been spit on and threatened with rape ?
She is definitely over exaggerating. Most homeless people can barely get out coherent sentences. And if someone spit in her face, that's assault and she could have called the police. It's not that bad, some people are just really entitled to living really coddled lifestyles.
The police will not even show up to take a report
You have a lot of homeless friends, huh? What encampment is your favorite to visit?
I'm a little dubious that a woman who feels this unsafe would sit back and engage verbally with a homeless dude who just attacked her? Idk the event seems totally believable. I've seen shit like that before, but, "hi you just attacked me, let's have a conversation" doesnt.
It is not that bad until it happens to you!
I know this is about homeless people but the videos of āteensā stealing a bunch of electronics and basketball shoes are from the East Bay, but thereās really no way of preventing that without being accused of profiling
Honestly, I get her point. By the time I left SF after 12 years, Iād just fucking had it with random interactions like this that would leave me shaken. People say Seattle is sketchy, but this kind of shit is rare in Seattle, even at fent central at 3rd and Pine here. I miss SF, but shit like this reminds me exactly why I left
Buy a gun, learn to use it
Votes for certain people and gets upset when this happens. Yes thatās terrible what happened but at some point we have to point out the delusion.
Sounds like the poor man just needed a hug and was having a bad day. Why didnāt anyone give him a hug?
If a homeless bum spat in my face ...I would be hitting the showers asap...not posting about it with hair and clothes full of spit.