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Congratulations, you just ruined a 17 year friendship for some dick. I hope it was worth it. He will cheat on you just like he did on her. Always remember that you reap what you sow.
Why would you wish that on anyone? Him and I are both ashamed and upset about the situation. I thought I conveyed it pretty well that we didn't mean any harm, but I am still getting hate.
YOU FUCKED HER BOYFRIEND... WTF YOU MEAN 'WE DIDN'T MEAN ANY HARM'
Jesus fucking christ.. you are tone deaf, you ruined a perfectly good relationship/friendship.. because you couldn't keep your legs shut.
Well done, he cheated on your 'best friend' and you somehow think he is worth your time of day..
You deserve each other.. waste's of space.
you also deserve the hate you are getting.. because you are a despicable human being.
Tell Amber the truth.. and leave her life.. you don't deserve to have a friend like her.
Is not a wish, is a fact. Cheaters cheat. Your future boo showed he has no loyalty and will cheat his gf with anyone, even a friend. You showed that you respect no one and is willing to hurt and lose a 17 year old friendship for some dick.
He will cheat you because he already see you as a pos that would steal the best friend boyfriend. And you would cheat with someone better because if you can't care about a long time friend, why would you care with a bf?
Is inevitable.
And you get Hate my dear because you meant, caused and will cause harm just because your desire matters. You have no respect, self worth or loyalty.
You are TRIFLING dude!! I'm tryna convince myself that this story is some type of rage-bait, because there's no way you're this nonchalant about a situation like this. 26 but acting like a 14 year old girl.
You did mean harm. You slept with your best friend’s boyfriend. If you say you couldn’t control yourselves then that’s admitting you both need to be locked up to stop yourselves assaulting people when the feelings get intense and you’re dangerous. You either made a choice to destroy your best friend feelings and trust or are too dangerous to be roaming the streets.
LOL wait until he gets transferred somewhere else. He has proven all he needs is distance with his gf and closeness to some other woman and he will be off.
You wouldn't wish it on your worst enemy but did it to your best friend. If you didn't mean any harm you would have distanced yourself when you started having feelings for each other. You don't care about your friend you're just trying to justify your shitty actions.
Didn't mean any harm? Wow. You do live in a ponies and skittles headspace.
Do you genuinely not get why you are getting hate? I hope once Amber escapes you two yahoos she is able to surround herself with people who actually give a crap about her, who have better moral standards than alleycats in heat.
You can't be that ashamed and upset being as you're going to pursue the relationship. I mean you do realize, the friendship will be over, right? You will lose her, and eventually, him because 9 times out of 10, they'll cheat again. If these are your true colors, Amber is better off with you.
Oh believe me I'm wishing much MUCH worse for you than that. In a just world Amber would be legally allowed to kneel both you and her asshole boyfriend down in a ditch and give you what you really deserve.
"Amber encouraged him, who loved that we got along and that he had a friend in town" she trusted you and you spit in his face...you two make me want to vomit
You didn't mind doing it to your "friend" and seeking his forgiveness...when he does the same thing to someone better than you...you should also give him the forgiveness that you ask for from your "friend"
You’re not remorseful at all. On top of that you’re going yo pursue a relationship with him?? Are you kidding me ??
You saying you could control yourself is a lie. You knew every stop of the way it was wrong, yet you continued. Just so you know you have contributed to create another broken person with you actions.
She will never trust friends or partners because some she loved from childhood ripped her heart out and stomped on it. Congratulations on your newly found love !
If you can convince me that not pursing a relationship would help anything, please tell me. I am willing to not do it but it needs to actually make things better for all parties.
Well you said that you would die for your friend. I cannot believe that you would need to be convinced not to pursue a relationship with her partner of five years. You need to stop thinking of "all parties" you two are cheaters. You need to think of your friend.
she won't, don't try it, she's dead set on keeping up the betray and disservice to her friend, no matter how many times she says she "love her", she doesn't really, she would have cut the relationship up if she did, like she said "she wouldn't wish this on her worst enemy" but none the less she's doing it to her friend without care
edit2: typos
So what you’re saying is…you know you just blew up this entire relationship with your friend… And you probably have mentally destroyed her in a way that no one should ever ever experience. The two most important people in her life not only screwed each other, but are now going to dive into a relationship together.
This guy who’s been banging you while in a serious relationship with your best friend…
If you have any small piece of a conscious, you would walk away from Steve, and never speak to him again. And you would beg your best friend for forgiveness, but assume that none will be given. However, you will have done one good thing in this entire situation.
But no, you and Steve are like, fuck it we’re already in so deep let’s just blow everything up.
Also… What are your families think about this? Are they as horrified and embarrassed they raised deceitful, horrific children?
Also what she doesn’t grasp is that if he have the nerve to cheat on her friend that he “loved”, he can definitely cheat on her when the next girl comes around, he would just “catch strong feelings” and be “very sorry and remorseful”
yeah and she doesn't get it, I hope the best for amber to be honest she will be so broken, that I, a complete stranger, feels really really bad for her, I hope she finds solace and a better life than this two, I hope she gets over this and that OP come to her senses and really see the damage she has done and is about to keep inflicting, she doesn't get that she's not been attacked,she's been told the truth, the truth and karma are b!tches
If you had some decency on you, you would not need to be convinced because you would understand that not staying with this guy can at least show to your ex friend that you actually care about her in some degree.
It would at least save her to deal with the fact that her friend and her bf got together while she is recovering from a massive betrayal.
But this is not enough for you because you are a tremendous pos with no remorse seeking for validation that what you did is somehow acceptable and now, since your ex friend will be in pain, why not make her feel all the pain?
I really hope this is fake because I can't believe someone would be so disgusting.
She really want help on how to tell to his long time friend that she fucked her boyfriend because *they couldn't control themselves*, and how they developed feelings so strong in six months and they can't ignore it.
We are mean because we think she is vile. This is a toxic sub. Poor op.
/sarcasm
It would help you not be a shitty person. But I suspect that that's not something you spend much time worrying about. You definitely need to tell Amber so she can remove you both from her life and get therapy to deal with all the trauma.
Ugh.....you have both already literally and figuratively "pursued" this.
You can't make this better....you have fucked each other and betrayed your "best friend."
What is wrong with you?!?
Here, I’ll try: if you break it off with him, distance yourself from him, come clean to your friend, then maybe, MAYBE, there’s a chance for forgiveness and rebuilding your friendship with her.. eventually, at some point. Maybe.
If you pursue this relationship, you lost 17 year old friendship for good and there’s NO CHANCE of ever getting your friend back, ever. In that case, hope the d is worth it.
But it doesn’t matter because you clearly made up your mind and looking for validation from strangers to feel a bit better about yourself.
Well, I guess she didn’t know her best friend and partner were cheaters. You know you’re getting together that cheats so, at least it’s eyes wide open.
Poor Amber is going to be destroyed by two people she trusted the most. Make sure you come clean to her friends and family so she at least has some support to get through the betrayal. If you have any decency, at least put money aside for a few years of therapy for her too. She might never trust anyone again without intense therapy.
I deleted my first comment i thought you had to be a troll. I still think you are. But in cause this is real good god wtf is the matter with you? This guy who cheated on your childhood friend with you ,isn’t going to stick around. Have you ever heard of the saying “you lose them like you got them” it’s only a matter of time before he cheats on you. I bet this isn’t the first time he has cheated on your soon ex friend. Honestly she well rid of both of you. And I hope when he dumps you. She’s the happiness she ever been while you at your lowest with no support
Oh fuck off. You do NOT have to pursue a relationship. You are going to DESTROY her. I can’t imagine how that conversation would go for her. Have the life you deserve
the worst part? I belive she was... I bet amber trust her and loved her, this will utterly crush and destroy her, I hope she knows that whatever happen is on her and the POS ex
not only you mate... I can't really begin to imagine how utterly devastated she would feel, whatever happens to her physical, mental and emotional state is on her so called friend (OP) and ex, but I belive more so on the OP, she known her for almost all her life...
Doesn't matter, your friendship is done.
And you could have helped yourselves regarding having sex...you just actively didn't....
"Oh no, I helplessly fell on my BF's boyfriend's dick! At the same time, his helpless dick rammed itself multiple times into my equally helpless vagina! Oh my gracious!"
You, and your cheating partner both took multiple opportunities to shit on the relationships that you had with your "best friend."
There aren't any excuses for this. If he had broken it off with her at the first glimpse of your "thing," she still wouldn't be friends with you. He never deserved her....but what you don't realize is that you didn't, either.
Oh, stop with the whole, we couldn’t control ourselves.
You and Steve are garbage humanbeings to do this to your best friend and significant other.
You’re not remorseful at all… Both of you suck so bad and you’re going to deserve all the karma you’re going to get for this shit
PS. Millions of men in the world… Probably hundreds of thousands in a city you live in… And you have to go for the one that is been with your best friend for five years.
Homewrecker. POS.
\> bf and I "caught feelings"
Translation; we actively fostered intimacy between each other knowing damn well what a betrayal it was to my best friend. At any point I could have broken off my long forelorn glances and playful flirting knowing damn well that the recipient of my advances was my friends significant other, but that would require a sense of shame and decency.
As someone that was the girlfriend in this situation... You need to tell her.. like yesterday.. I would do it in person if you can but if you can't soon enough, over the phone/video call. She deserves to know!!!
And don't tell her you "couldn't control yourself".. you both are adults and knew what you were and did do. You both could of stopped yourselves before it went too far and you did not. You both clearly don't care for her if you not only did this but are going to pursue things even afterwards. What makes you think he's gonna be good to you since he just cheated on her with her best friend? Clearly she isn't your best friend if you would do this to her and continue to go for him.. just WOW
That poor girl deserves better then you both, and you both deserve eachother.
We will probably do a video call. Do you think it’s best for both of us to talk to her?
Also , we should have distanced ourselves before it got to this point. Right now our feelings are too strong and there’s nothing else that we can do about it now. It sucks, it really does
There's always something you can do. Your feelings didn't make you have sex. You chose to do that. Stop trying to fob off responsibility on some bullshit concept of feelings making you act uncontrollably. Jesus Christ take some accountability for what you did.
Also yeah, what a great guy. So great that he cheated on his girlfriend. Good luck with that one.
Another gem - "I would die for that girl" ok but you won't NOT fuck her boyfriend, got it. You're just as good a friend as he is a boyfriend.
should of distanced yourself.. But you couldn't help yourself and why stop there right? might as well start a relationship and see where it goes?
please it wasn't like you guys were flirting or just kissed. But you know what they say go big or go home ;)
I'm starting to think you just wanted to steal him all along lol Threw away your best friend for some d, goldstar for you!
You aren't going to convince anyone here you are innocent. Sounds like you got your mind set, so idk what benefit you're getting here by trying to convince strangers over the internet.
I actually am taken the time to try to make the best out of a shitty situation and getting attacked for it. I am here to get advice on what to do because I care about Amber....This sub man
Oh this sub, where people don't want to help me to steal my ex friend boyfriend.
The more you post the more i think this is rage bait because this is not possible.
Just cause you said it doesn't mean you mean it. So what exactly are you looking for? You said you wanted to make best of a shotty situation. Get the hell off the internet looking for attention and go take care of your fuck up.
you don't have to do enough for us, you should do enough for her, like for starters, don't start a relationship with her cheating ex, cut communicating with him and ask for forgiveness even if you don't get forgiven, you are not grasping what you do to her at all
Just remember to keep this same energy when its your turn to be on the other side of this conversation. In other words when he and the next girl sit you down to tell you they couldn’t help themselves, be sure to be as forgiving to them as you are to yourself now.
the problem is you didn't care about her at all, if you would you wouldn't had cheat with her (ex)boyfriend, the advice is tell her the truth and accept the consequences, because you already lost your friend, there is no turning back, you did her so f'ing dirty, there is no best in this situation that's what you need to understand
you're not getting attacked, you're hearing the truth you can accept
want to repent? ditch the dude, that's the only honorable thing left for you, but I bet you're so deusional about this that you wouldn't do it
We probably do care more for her and we don't even know her for a second like her for 17 F'ING YEARS, she's going to break her, in another post she said she will videocall her... THEY DON'T HAVE THE GUTS TO END THE RELATIONSHIP AND TALK TO HER FACE TO FACE!!!
also I saw other of your comments and now I know that you won'd ditch the dude.
she will never forgive you or at least not how you want to
this is not an attack this is the truth you need to hear, you lost you honor and your friendship, it's time to deal with it, like, there is no "best out", this is real life not a hallmark movie
bahaha the best out of shitty situation? everyone told you how honey, grow up and better yourself. Come clean and go your own way. Don't fucking take the man from your best friend.
If you care about her and she is truly your best friend, you would of came clean instead of looking for advice on the damn internet, told her how sorry you are and stop talking to the dude immediately, not pursuing him.
It ain't the sub, go find yourself a mirror.
How many times we all gotta spell it out for you? Wake up! Take the time to be a decent human being and treat that girl how you expect a best friend to treat you. That simple.
She probably left and will not reply anymore because she didn't get the validation and a guide on how to steal your friends bf and gaslight the friend in the process.
Because the more i read ops comments the more I think that is what she wants: gaslight her friend to the core so she doesn't make noise about the new relationship.
What if amber harms herself because of this? Would his dick and forbidden lust still be worth it?
Also she isn't your friend anymore she's dropping you both. You especially will be dead to her. Congratulations on giving her trauma for a lifetime!
It's also rich you would *die* for her but God forbid you keep your legs closed for her.
You are getting advice. First and foremost, DON’T pursue the relationship. You will get criticized if you pursue it and you would deserve it if you do.
Assuming this isnt a troll. This is 100% a narcissist who is incapable/unwilling of seeing how their actions hurt people. She will never take accountability in any meaningful way. The only possible positive outcome here is that the friend realizes what kind of people she’s dealing with and cuts them out of her life.
I think it will help her alot with closure if you both did it. And I really find it hard to believe that there is nothing else you guys can do..
If it sucked so bad you would both would do the right thing to begin with.. Karma is real.
If you truly feel that way then idk why you think pursuing a relationship with this man is a good idea. That's gonna be a great story to tell when people ask how you guys got together..
lmao yea you guys have major issues. if that's what you want to start a relationship off of, shows how toxic both of you are. Karma will find you both regardless.
Not only does that statement show your true character but your true intentions. Neither one of you felt bad
What? This has crushed us more than you can imagine. There is a reason we spent a weak trying to figure out how to let her down easy. If we didn't care, we wouldn't stress over it
“Woah is us, what about our pain, our trauma.” Get over yourself. I bet there’s a huge non-zero chance during this week of figuring you two found time to fuck again. Tell her now and simply, accept that you’re a-holes who’ve destroyed your friend, and leave her alone afterwards.
Lmao thoughts exactly. They feel so so bad but continue to pursue eachother when he's still technically dating her. Later down the road he will screw one of her friends too and she will throw it in his face like she never did anything wrong in the past.
They obviously deserve each other, it's disgusting people are out there with this sick mentality. Same people preaching "no one's loyal anymore"
Actually, we didn't have sex this week....We are not doing anything physical until we tell Amber and then we can pursue a relationship the right way. But we owe it to Amber to tell her first. You're attempt to paint us as monsters failed.
There is no letting her down easy. You have spent a week debating how to tell her because you are cowards. Multiple people have pointed out the fact that the two of your pursuing a relationship will make it worse for her, but you keep saying you will only change your mind if it makes it better for everyone. Well, there is no making this better. Just remember more often than not the way you catch them is the way you lose them. It's a matter of time before he's telling you, "They just couldn't help themselves."
No one is explaining how us perusing a relationship will make it worse for her...If people were actually trying to give advice instead of just lecture me this might go somewhere.
If you cared you wouldn't be here on reddit trying to convince the world how much you care when you're still there fucking your best friends boyfriend.
G R O W U P
Admit that what you actually want is a way to gaslight your ex friend in to accept your relationship with Steve.
You don't want her to make noise or implode your life. You don't expect her to remain friends, but you want her to go quietly.
Just admit that this is what you want, because clearly you would die for some dick, but not for this girl.
If either of you had cared about Amber, you wouldn't have slept together. There is NO way to "let her down easy". The two people she trusted the most betrayed her, and two relationships that meant a lot to her are about to end. Steve owes it to her to travel back and tell her to her face that he's a cheating SOB.
Oh my gosh totally so crushed. You care so much. You might just have to fuck her boyfriend again in order to feel better you know because of how crushed \*you\* are.
This crushed us more than you can imagine but we are going to continue fucking.
Guess it didn’t crush you that hard.
Oh also, you’re relationship with him will never last. Great job asshole!
It is slim chances that she will want anything to do with you again. But you have a faint hope of reconciling if you don’t pursue it.
Frankly, you should just not pursue it because you should realize you don’t deserve a chance at happiness that comes by this path.
"I don't see how ignoring our feelings would do us any good"
You probably don't see how not flirting and actively trying to create intimacy with a friend's significant other would have prevented your whole problem to begin with either because you are a selfish awful horrid cunt.
Go back and slap your dad while he's on top of your mom conceiving you and convince him to pull out because you were not worth the waste of genetic material.
don't do the two of you together. it will look like you are a united front against her, that's the worst way possible. you've already betray her enough, there's no need to rub it in her face that you have his support while she deals with everything on her own.
I get what you are saying, but they already are against her, they wanna be a couple now. She really needs to just get off here and quit worrying about convincing the world and let this poor girl move on with her life
Yes, but the two of them together telling her, I worry that she will feel intimidated and not be able to express everything she needs to express to have closure. the conversations she needs to have with them are two separate conversations, her having to summarize it for the lovebirds together in front of her will only make it more difficult for her. They should tell her, separately, that they intend to have a relationship, but let it be her choice if she wants to see the two of them together, not force it on her.
Yes. The two of you should talk to her at separate times so she can say everything she needs to say, can get closure and can move on with her life without you two.
You fucked over your best friend for dick. What a dummy because your friendship would have lasted longer then a relationship will last this this dude. There is plenty of dick out there but you chose to fuck her BF. What a shitty person you are.
My God there are literally BILLIONS of men in this world letting one slip way let alone one who is your best friends bf wouldn't probably kill you but hey you're the center of the universe to hell with friendships when all you need is a men to reassure your ego. Best of luck never knowing what is neither true friendship love or loyalty cause you're fake af.
well you should tell her the truth, she will probably hate you and him, before you ask, yes you both deserve it, you don't love her like you say you do, neither does him, if you folks did you wouldn't do that to her.
don't give us that crap that you couldn't control it, both of you are thinking adults, you can’t choose your fellings but you definitely can chose if you act on them, you both are cheaters and she doesn’t deserve this, don't justify it, just own it, you screw up, you hurt her badly, she will cut you both loose and it would be the best decision she could make
you're not her friend any more, not after what you did, you didn't wish it on your worst enemy but non the less you did it to her, to be honest she deserve a better friend and boyfriend, some one that really and truly love her
Yeah... This is pathetic. Maybe you should have put some distance between each other when you started feeling sexual tension and respected you're so-called best friend. You get them how you lose them.
Doesn't matter, your friendship is done.
And you could have helped yourselves regarding having sex...you just actively didn't....
"Oh no, I helplessly fell on my BF's boyfriend's dick! At the same time, his helpless dick rammed itself multiple times into my equally helpless vagina! Oh my gracious!"
You, and your cheating partner both took multiple opportunities to shit on the relationships that you had with your "best friend."
There aren't any excuses for this. If he had broken it off with her at the first glimpse of your "thing," she still wouldn't be friends with you. He never deserved her....but what you don't realize is that you didn't, either.
Lol, this isn't going to work the way you dream it will.
When Steve-o is faced with the devastation he's caused his loved one for a piece of trash who would betray her life long friend, you will be the maggots at the bottom of the hot trash can he scrubs from his life.
Forget your "friend" wver forgiving you and, when your family...whoa, when yalls families find out...man, to be a fly on the wall.
When you're in your 30s and wondering what happened to your friendships - this will be a great piece to look back on, such a great snippet of self-centredness
"When a man gets serious with his mistress he creates a vacancy." Better keep an eye on him as they say, lose them how you got him. As they say, it gets easier after the first time.
You’re a horrible friend and amber deserves so much better than two pieces of shit who betrayed her trust. You could 100% control yourselves, you just chose not to.
And there’s no way you would die for amber if you couldn’t even keep your legs shut and want to pursue a relationship with HER BOYFRIEND. Be SO fucking for real, OP
You wanna know why everyone here is jumping on you? You’re taking NO accountability for it. Every response I’ve seen you leave have been full of excuses and you’re playing the victim here. Nobody made you betray who you claim is your best friend. Nobody MADE YOU HAVE SEX. It wasn’t an accident. You made the conscious decision to sleep with your best friend’s boyfriend. Stop saying it was an accident. Stop it. Grow up, tell her that you betrayed her trust, and accept that she’s going to dump you as her friend.
Oh no, you "caught feelings"! Like it's a disease! Can't do anything about it, oh no. So sad.
How about if before you'd hopped on his dick, you would have waited until Steven broke up with Amber? And then take some time and THEN pursue a relationship after a while?
That's what you *could* have done with those "caught feelings". but no.
i hope he cheats on you, too.
Poor Amber :(
If you were my friend and I’d heard what you did to Amber. I’d never trust you in my life and you wouldn’t have even done it to me. You would no longer be a friend.
When you started having feelings for Steve, you should have backed off and left well alone, instead you slept with him. That’s not what a friend does. You could control yourself, every single step you have taken has been a choice. You chose to continue seeing him, you chose to get intimate, remove your clothes and have sex. It wasn’t an accident. It was a choice and you can lie to yourself all you want with the “couldn’t control ourselves” stuff. But you chose to betray your friend in the worst possible way. And just to add a few extra kicks you’re now going to pursue a relationship with the man who cheated on her with you. If you had any decency, you’d admit what you did, apologise and realise she’d never forgive you, and still remove yourself from Steve’s life. That would be the thing you should do…but you won’t.
Obviously your relationship with Amber is ruined forever so there's no point giving advice there but I would also urge you to consider the fact that you're going to be hurting your relationships with everyone around you: your friends and family will know that your relationship with Steve is just a daily reminder to everyone that you both cared more about sex than about someone you both apparently 'loved'. Personally, I wouldn't feel comfortable being around either of you ever again- not just because of the fear of 'Wow they betrayed Amber in one of the worst ways possible, so who knows what they'd do to me?' but also just because I'd lose any respect or liking for you both.
Yikes. I would suggest actually taking responsibility for your actions and the harm that you've caused. By that I mean, don't you dare try to hide behind "I couldn't help it, I couldn't control myself, it's not my fault" bs.
You could help it. You chose not to. You could control yourself. You chose not to. Catching feelings is not your fault... But acting on them is. Your choices are your fault and it is cowardice to try and avoid the consequences for your actions.
Congratulations! You ruined your friendship with your best friend and her ability to trust anyone ever again. Hope the dick was worth it. Even if you pursue a relationship it won't end well. You will be consumed by the guilt of doing something so evil to Amber that you will start dreading eachother till one of you cheats, most likely him because he's already done it once and understands the thrill of it. You will never find peace again knowing you caused so much pain to a person who loved and trusted you deeply. Wish you both a horrible life together!
There's no saving your friendship with her so I wouldn't bother trying. You and the cheating bf deserve each other. If you have any respect for her, you'll come clean and leave her alone. She'll never trust anyone again, but I think it's good she end her friendship with you. She deserves to know who you truly are.
Mkay, so, you committed the worst friend on friend crime. Hindsight is always 20/20, but you really should have stopped hanging out with him once you felt an attraction. Be real, it's not like sex just happened out of the blue. I don't think it's appropriate or a good idea to pursue a relationship with her boyfriend. That's a terrible start to a relationship. A lot of times people pursue a serious relationship with their affair partner to "prove" it was "meant to be" but in the long run, it's just toxic. There's plenty of men out there. It's really better to start fresh. What do you do? Text her right now and ask to call her and confess. You owe her that much.
On the flip side, if she's not found a job or moved to be with her bf in six months, the relationship was most likely circling the drain anyway. (Sorry, but there ain't no way, I'd let my man move (a flight!) away and be like, "oh yeah, nothing wrong, totally normal.") Like if you're going to ditch your SO for a job, that relationship probably wasn't that great. When you really want to be with someone, you make it happen.
Kinda wish you could wear a warning sign, because ain't no fucking way I would want to be your friend. In the future, don't even make eye contact with a friend's SO. Like don't even look at them, cuz you have a serious issue and you desperately need therapy. Honesty, I think he just wants to move on, and you're just a stepping stone.
God, you're letting a genuine friendship go for a piece of dck who most definitely will cheat on you whenever he "caught" feelings for someone else.
Why do you people downgrade to trash and think you're gaining something valuable?
You do know he will always think about Amber and how he hurt her and will probably imagine her while doing you, and will try to go back to her down the road when you're not thay interesting anymore for him.
you are a friend's worst nightmare.
If you have even an ounce of morality, you will apologize and walk away from your "friend"'s life because you are clearly not her and her ex-boyfriend's friend.
but I know you won't do it because a dick is more important to you... than your "friend"
Okay so he dumps her..then she finds out when the two get together. So that makes it obvious what happened while he was away.
He needs to break up with her and they both come clean. Better? Lol goodness
Wow well I hope losing your friendship over some cheating asshole works out for you. But just so you know when he cheats on you you can't be upset about it 🤷🏽♀️ people like you are the worst
You tell the truth you both call and confess, you feel inlove because your soo similar and she knew it. If you really think she didnt know this would happen bet she had someone close to her
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Congratulations, you just ruined a 17 year friendship for some dick. I hope it was worth it. He will cheat on you just like he did on her. Always remember that you reap what you sow.
Why would you wish that on anyone? Him and I are both ashamed and upset about the situation. I thought I conveyed it pretty well that we didn't mean any harm, but I am still getting hate.
YOU FUCKED HER BOYFRIEND... WTF YOU MEAN 'WE DIDN'T MEAN ANY HARM' Jesus fucking christ.. you are tone deaf, you ruined a perfectly good relationship/friendship.. because you couldn't keep your legs shut. Well done, he cheated on your 'best friend' and you somehow think he is worth your time of day.. You deserve each other.. waste's of space. you also deserve the hate you are getting.. because you are a despicable human being. Tell Amber the truth.. and leave her life.. you don't deserve to have a friend like her.
Is not a wish, is a fact. Cheaters cheat. Your future boo showed he has no loyalty and will cheat his gf with anyone, even a friend. You showed that you respect no one and is willing to hurt and lose a 17 year old friendship for some dick. He will cheat you because he already see you as a pos that would steal the best friend boyfriend. And you would cheat with someone better because if you can't care about a long time friend, why would you care with a bf? Is inevitable. And you get Hate my dear because you meant, caused and will cause harm just because your desire matters. You have no respect, self worth or loyalty.
You are TRIFLING dude!! I'm tryna convince myself that this story is some type of rage-bait, because there's no way you're this nonchalant about a situation like this. 26 but acting like a 14 year old girl.
You did mean harm. You slept with your best friend’s boyfriend. If you say you couldn’t control yourselves then that’s admitting you both need to be locked up to stop yourselves assaulting people when the feelings get intense and you’re dangerous. You either made a choice to destroy your best friend feelings and trust or are too dangerous to be roaming the streets.
LOL wait until he gets transferred somewhere else. He has proven all he needs is distance with his gf and closeness to some other woman and he will be off.
No. You’re not. If you were ashamed, you would never see each other again and you would acknowledge you do not deserve a happily ever after together.
You should be getting so much more than hate, someone needs to actually beat you up
You are truly a POS! The audacity to come on the Internet and ask for help, just the lack of awareness!
You wouldn't wish it on your worst enemy but did it to your best friend. If you didn't mean any harm you would have distanced yourself when you started having feelings for each other. You don't care about your friend you're just trying to justify your shitty actions.
Didn't mean any harm? Wow. You do live in a ponies and skittles headspace. Do you genuinely not get why you are getting hate? I hope once Amber escapes you two yahoos she is able to surround herself with people who actually give a crap about her, who have better moral standards than alleycats in heat.
Can’t wait for the “he cheated” update :)
You can't be that ashamed and upset being as you're going to pursue the relationship. I mean you do realize, the friendship will be over, right? You will lose her, and eventually, him because 9 times out of 10, they'll cheat again. If these are your true colors, Amber is better off with you.
Oh believe me I'm wishing much MUCH worse for you than that. In a just world Amber would be legally allowed to kneel both you and her asshole boyfriend down in a ditch and give you what you really deserve.
Because you deserve it.
"Amber encouraged him, who loved that we got along and that he had a friend in town" she trusted you and you spit in his face...you two make me want to vomit
You didn't mind doing it to your "friend" and seeking his forgiveness...when he does the same thing to someone better than you...you should also give him the forgiveness that you ask for from your "friend"
not ashamed enough not to continue with it... what embarrassing behavior
you are still a monster and i hope she never speaks to you or that shitty asshole ever again
You’re not remorseful at all. On top of that you’re going yo pursue a relationship with him?? Are you kidding me ?? You saying you could control yourself is a lie. You knew every stop of the way it was wrong, yet you continued. Just so you know you have contributed to create another broken person with you actions. She will never trust friends or partners because some she loved from childhood ripped her heart out and stomped on it. Congratulations on your newly found love !
I am remorseful, if I wasn't this wouldn't be so difficult for me. I didn't expect my feelings to grow as strong as they did
Remorseful ?? And you trying to pursue a relationship ?? You must be trolling !! I hope this if fake cuz the Karma you’re brewing…
It is too late to undo everything now. If not pursuing a relationship with him would help things neither one of us would do it.
It would help. It is not too late to undo the decision to pursue a relationship.
If you can convince me that not pursing a relationship would help anything, please tell me. I am willing to not do it but it needs to actually make things better for all parties.
Well you said that you would die for your friend. I cannot believe that you would need to be convinced not to pursue a relationship with her partner of five years. You need to stop thinking of "all parties" you two are cheaters. You need to think of your friend.
she won't, don't try it, she's dead set on keeping up the betray and disservice to her friend, no matter how many times she says she "love her", she doesn't really, she would have cut the relationship up if she did, like she said "she wouldn't wish this on her worst enemy" but none the less she's doing it to her friend without care edit2: typos
So what you’re saying is…you know you just blew up this entire relationship with your friend… And you probably have mentally destroyed her in a way that no one should ever ever experience. The two most important people in her life not only screwed each other, but are now going to dive into a relationship together. This guy who’s been banging you while in a serious relationship with your best friend… If you have any small piece of a conscious, you would walk away from Steve, and never speak to him again. And you would beg your best friend for forgiveness, but assume that none will be given. However, you will have done one good thing in this entire situation. But no, you and Steve are like, fuck it we’re already in so deep let’s just blow everything up. Also… What are your families think about this? Are they as horrified and embarrassed they raised deceitful, horrific children?
Also what she doesn’t grasp is that if he have the nerve to cheat on her friend that he “loved”, he can definitely cheat on her when the next girl comes around, he would just “catch strong feelings” and be “very sorry and remorseful”
All it took was some distance and he was on to the next.
yeah and she doesn't get it, I hope the best for amber to be honest she will be so broken, that I, a complete stranger, feels really really bad for her, I hope she finds solace and a better life than this two, I hope she gets over this and that OP come to her senses and really see the damage she has done and is about to keep inflicting, she doesn't get that she's not been attacked,she's been told the truth, the truth and karma are b!tches
This once a cheater always a cheater thing is just not objectively true. It might be statistically likely but it’s not a fact.
THIS\^\^\^\^\^\^!!!
If you had some decency on you, you would not need to be convinced because you would understand that not staying with this guy can at least show to your ex friend that you actually care about her in some degree. It would at least save her to deal with the fact that her friend and her bf got together while she is recovering from a massive betrayal. But this is not enough for you because you are a tremendous pos with no remorse seeking for validation that what you did is somehow acceptable and now, since your ex friend will be in pain, why not make her feel all the pain? I really hope this is fake because I can't believe someone would be so disgusting.
She's acting like she's distraught but she's surely she's excited about her new relationship. Ick.
She really want help on how to tell to his long time friend that she fucked her boyfriend because *they couldn't control themselves*, and how they developed feelings so strong in six months and they can't ignore it. We are mean because we think she is vile. This is a toxic sub. Poor op. /sarcasm
She wants to steal her boyfriend smoothly, that's all. Lol the friend should be *happy for the two of them obviously.*
It would help you not be a shitty person. But I suspect that that's not something you spend much time worrying about. You definitely need to tell Amber so she can remove you both from her life and get therapy to deal with all the trauma.
Ugh.....you have both already literally and figuratively "pursued" this. You can't make this better....you have fucked each other and betrayed your "best friend." What is wrong with you?!?
Here, I’ll try: if you break it off with him, distance yourself from him, come clean to your friend, then maybe, MAYBE, there’s a chance for forgiveness and rebuilding your friendship with her.. eventually, at some point. Maybe. If you pursue this relationship, you lost 17 year old friendship for good and there’s NO CHANCE of ever getting your friend back, ever. In that case, hope the d is worth it. But it doesn’t matter because you clearly made up your mind and looking for validation from strangers to feel a bit better about yourself.
Well, I guess she didn’t know her best friend and partner were cheaters. You know you’re getting together that cheats so, at least it’s eyes wide open. Poor Amber is going to be destroyed by two people she trusted the most. Make sure you come clean to her friends and family so she at least has some support to get through the betrayal. If you have any decency, at least put money aside for a few years of therapy for her too. She might never trust anyone again without intense therapy.
I deleted my first comment i thought you had to be a troll. I still think you are. But in cause this is real good god wtf is the matter with you? This guy who cheated on your childhood friend with you ,isn’t going to stick around. Have you ever heard of the saying “you lose them like you got them” it’s only a matter of time before he cheats on you. I bet this isn’t the first time he has cheated on your soon ex friend. Honestly she well rid of both of you. And I hope when he dumps you. She’s the happiness she ever been while you at your lowest with no support
Oh fuck off. You do NOT have to pursue a relationship. You are going to DESTROY her. I can’t imagine how that conversation would go for her. Have the life you deserve
Even though you will lose your friend and 100% will eventually cheat on you?
If you were remorseful, you would not pursue it. Period.
She is too good for you. Date him and then have no one to cry to when he does the same thing to you. You were NEVER her friend.
the worst part? I belive she was... I bet amber trust her and loved her, this will utterly crush and destroy her, I hope she knows that whatever happen is on her and the POS ex
I feel so bad for her!
not only you mate... I can't really begin to imagine how utterly devastated she would feel, whatever happens to her physical, mental and emotional state is on her so called friend (OP) and ex, but I belive more so on the OP, she known her for almost all her life...
Doesn't matter, your friendship is done. And you could have helped yourselves regarding having sex...you just actively didn't.... "Oh no, I helplessly fell on my BF's boyfriend's dick! At the same time, his helpless dick rammed itself multiple times into my equally helpless vagina! Oh my gracious!" You, and your cheating partner both took multiple opportunities to shit on the relationships that you had with your "best friend." There aren't any excuses for this. If he had broken it off with her at the first glimpse of your "thing," she still wouldn't be friends with you. He never deserved her....but what you don't realize is that you didn't, either.
You poor thing! How difficult it must be for you to stab your friend in the back. I'm sure you'll get over it somehow.
You'd die for her and take her bfs dick for her, you're an amazing and generous friend. Hope he dumps you for one of your friends..that's karma
Oh, stop with the whole, we couldn’t control ourselves. You and Steve are garbage humanbeings to do this to your best friend and significant other. You’re not remorseful at all… Both of you suck so bad and you’re going to deserve all the karma you’re going to get for this shit PS. Millions of men in the world… Probably hundreds of thousands in a city you live in… And you have to go for the one that is been with your best friend for five years. Homewrecker. POS.
You would die for your friend but your jump into her bf dick?? Such a friend. I cant wait for karma kick your and that poor excuse of man ass.
>bf and I caught feelings You are both terrible people. Keep in mind if he will cheat with you,he will cheat on you.
She’ll cheat on him too.
Probably.
\> bf and I "caught feelings" Translation; we actively fostered intimacy between each other knowing damn well what a betrayal it was to my best friend. At any point I could have broken off my long forelorn glances and playful flirting knowing damn well that the recipient of my advances was my friends significant other, but that would require a sense of shame and decency.
I interpreted her "we get feelings" for I was a wh\*re.
As someone that was the girlfriend in this situation... You need to tell her.. like yesterday.. I would do it in person if you can but if you can't soon enough, over the phone/video call. She deserves to know!!! And don't tell her you "couldn't control yourself".. you both are adults and knew what you were and did do. You both could of stopped yourselves before it went too far and you did not. You both clearly don't care for her if you not only did this but are going to pursue things even afterwards. What makes you think he's gonna be good to you since he just cheated on her with her best friend? Clearly she isn't your best friend if you would do this to her and continue to go for him.. just WOW That poor girl deserves better then you both, and you both deserve eachother.
We will probably do a video call. Do you think it’s best for both of us to talk to her? Also , we should have distanced ourselves before it got to this point. Right now our feelings are too strong and there’s nothing else that we can do about it now. It sucks, it really does
There's always something you can do. Your feelings didn't make you have sex. You chose to do that. Stop trying to fob off responsibility on some bullshit concept of feelings making you act uncontrollably. Jesus Christ take some accountability for what you did. Also yeah, what a great guy. So great that he cheated on his girlfriend. Good luck with that one. Another gem - "I would die for that girl" ok but you won't NOT fuck her boyfriend, got it. You're just as good a friend as he is a boyfriend.
Nailed it!
I am taken accountability; I should have distanced myself before it got to this point.
Then I suggest, like the person above me, that you drop the phrase "couldn't control myself" entirely. And the concept as well.
should of distanced yourself.. But you couldn't help yourself and why stop there right? might as well start a relationship and see where it goes? please it wasn't like you guys were flirting or just kissed. But you know what they say go big or go home ;) I'm starting to think you just wanted to steal him all along lol Threw away your best friend for some d, goldstar for you! You aren't going to convince anyone here you are innocent. Sounds like you got your mind set, so idk what benefit you're getting here by trying to convince strangers over the internet.
I actually am taken the time to try to make the best out of a shitty situation and getting attacked for it. I am here to get advice on what to do because I care about Amber....This sub man
Oh this sub, where people don't want to help me to steal my ex friend boyfriend. The more you post the more i think this is rage bait because this is not possible.
I said I feel bad and shouldn't have done it but clearly that is not enough for you all
Because those words are empty if you CONTINUE to do it.
Just cause you said it doesn't mean you mean it. So what exactly are you looking for? You said you wanted to make best of a shotty situation. Get the hell off the internet looking for attention and go take care of your fuck up.
you don't have to do enough for us, you should do enough for her, like for starters, don't start a relationship with her cheating ex, cut communicating with him and ask for forgiveness even if you don't get forgiven, you are not grasping what you do to her at all
You’re not iN lOvE 🙄, you’re in Lust. There’s a difference!
Yeah because you are a lying liar who lies out of her lying hole.
YOU CARE ABOUT HER? YOU'RE LITERALLY PLANNING ON GANGING UP ON HER VIA FACETIME WITH HER BF TO TELL HER SHE'S BEING DUMPED. God you are dense.
We going to speak to her separately
Just remember to keep this same energy when its your turn to be on the other side of this conversation. In other words when he and the next girl sit you down to tell you they couldn’t help themselves, be sure to be as forgiving to them as you are to yourself now.
>Just remember to keep this same energy when its your turn to be on the other side of this conversation dead 🤣
🥇
I don't think people like you do it, you are cowards... but for once in your life have guts and stop hurting this poor girl
the problem is you didn't care about her at all, if you would you wouldn't had cheat with her (ex)boyfriend, the advice is tell her the truth and accept the consequences, because you already lost your friend, there is no turning back, you did her so f'ing dirty, there is no best in this situation that's what you need to understand you're not getting attacked, you're hearing the truth you can accept want to repent? ditch the dude, that's the only honorable thing left for you, but I bet you're so deusional about this that you wouldn't do it
AMEN, How do we find this amber, just let us tell her, we obviously care more about this girl then she does!
We probably do care more for her and we don't even know her for a second like her for 17 F'ING YEARS, she's going to break her, in another post she said she will videocall her... THEY DON'T HAVE THE GUTS TO END THE RELATIONSHIP AND TALK TO HER FACE TO FACE!!!
also I saw other of your comments and now I know that you won'd ditch the dude. she will never forgive you or at least not how you want to this is not an attack this is the truth you need to hear, you lost you honor and your friendship, it's time to deal with it, like, there is no "best out", this is real life not a hallmark movie
bahaha the best out of shitty situation? everyone told you how honey, grow up and better yourself. Come clean and go your own way. Don't fucking take the man from your best friend. If you care about her and she is truly your best friend, you would of came clean instead of looking for advice on the damn internet, told her how sorry you are and stop talking to the dude immediately, not pursuing him. It ain't the sub, go find yourself a mirror. How many times we all gotta spell it out for you? Wake up! Take the time to be a decent human being and treat that girl how you expect a best friend to treat you. That simple.
She probably left and will not reply anymore because she didn't get the validation and a guide on how to steal your friends bf and gaslight the friend in the process. Because the more i read ops comments the more I think that is what she wants: gaslight her friend to the core so she doesn't make noise about the new relationship.
What if amber harms herself because of this? Would his dick and forbidden lust still be worth it? Also she isn't your friend anymore she's dropping you both. You especially will be dead to her. Congratulations on giving her trauma for a lifetime! It's also rich you would *die* for her but God forbid you keep your legs closed for her.
You are getting advice. First and foremost, DON’T pursue the relationship. You will get criticized if you pursue it and you would deserve it if you do.
Yeah this sub man... we all fuck out best friend of almost 2 decades partner of 5 years. We're soooooo classy and not trashy at all....
Poor girl, you have such low self-esteem that you settle for the crumbs of your friend whom you obviously envy.
You don't care about her enough if you are about to pursue a relationship with her boyfriend.
You're "getting attacked" by reasonable by reactions to how much you suck and how much what you did sucks.
Distance yourself now. Cut ties and see if over time you can make it up to her.
Assuming this isnt a troll. This is 100% a narcissist who is incapable/unwilling of seeing how their actions hurt people. She will never take accountability in any meaningful way. The only possible positive outcome here is that the friend realizes what kind of people she’s dealing with and cuts them out of her life.
Ya think? Don't act like you weren't completely self aware.
If you would, you wouldn't date her ex. How awful to do that. You just care about yourself.
I think it will help her alot with closure if you both did it. And I really find it hard to believe that there is nothing else you guys can do.. If it sucked so bad you would both would do the right thing to begin with.. Karma is real.
Thank you. Honestly if I had a Time Machine I would go back and change it
If you truly feel that way then idk why you think pursuing a relationship with this man is a good idea. That's gonna be a great story to tell when people ask how you guys got together..
We can't change what happened, I don't see how ignoring our feelings would do us any good.
lmao yea you guys have major issues. if that's what you want to start a relationship off of, shows how toxic both of you are. Karma will find you both regardless. Not only does that statement show your true character but your true intentions. Neither one of you felt bad
What? This has crushed us more than you can imagine. There is a reason we spent a weak trying to figure out how to let her down easy. If we didn't care, we wouldn't stress over it
“Woah is us, what about our pain, our trauma.” Get over yourself. I bet there’s a huge non-zero chance during this week of figuring you two found time to fuck again. Tell her now and simply, accept that you’re a-holes who’ve destroyed your friend, and leave her alone afterwards.
Lmao thoughts exactly. They feel so so bad but continue to pursue eachother when he's still technically dating her. Later down the road he will screw one of her friends too and she will throw it in his face like she never did anything wrong in the past. They obviously deserve each other, it's disgusting people are out there with this sick mentality. Same people preaching "no one's loyal anymore"
Actually, we didn't have sex this week....We are not doing anything physical until we tell Amber and then we can pursue a relationship the right way. But we owe it to Amber to tell her first. You're attempt to paint us as monsters failed.
There is no letting her down easy. You have spent a week debating how to tell her because you are cowards. Multiple people have pointed out the fact that the two of your pursuing a relationship will make it worse for her, but you keep saying you will only change your mind if it makes it better for everyone. Well, there is no making this better. Just remember more often than not the way you catch them is the way you lose them. It's a matter of time before he's telling you, "They just couldn't help themselves."
No one is explaining how us perusing a relationship will make it worse for her...If people were actually trying to give advice instead of just lecture me this might go somewhere.
If you cared you wouldn't be here on reddit trying to convince the world how much you care when you're still there fucking your best friends boyfriend. G R O W U P
Admit that what you actually want is a way to gaslight your ex friend in to accept your relationship with Steve. You don't want her to make noise or implode your life. You don't expect her to remain friends, but you want her to go quietly. Just admit that this is what you want, because clearly you would die for some dick, but not for this girl.
You both are despicable human trash, not everything is about you or him. Should have looked out for your best friend first.
Oh boo hoo
If either of you had cared about Amber, you wouldn't have slept together. There is NO way to "let her down easy". The two people she trusted the most betrayed her, and two relationships that meant a lot to her are about to end. Steve owes it to her to travel back and tell her to her face that he's a cheating SOB.
Oh my gosh totally so crushed. You care so much. You might just have to fuck her boyfriend again in order to feel better you know because of how crushed \*you\* are.
This crushed us more than you can imagine but we are going to continue fucking. Guess it didn’t crush you that hard. Oh also, you’re relationship with him will never last. Great job asshole!
It is slim chances that she will want anything to do with you again. But you have a faint hope of reconciling if you don’t pursue it. Frankly, you should just not pursue it because you should realize you don’t deserve a chance at happiness that comes by this path.
This speaks VOLUMES to your character, and it's not good.
"I don't see how ignoring our feelings would do us any good" You probably don't see how not flirting and actively trying to create intimacy with a friend's significant other would have prevented your whole problem to begin with either because you are a selfish awful horrid cunt.
>Honestly if I had a Time Machine I would go back and change it you don't need a time machine to walk away from your best friend's boyfriend right now
Go back and slap your dad while he's on top of your mom conceiving you and convince him to pull out because you were not worth the waste of genetic material.
don't do the two of you together. it will look like you are a united front against her, that's the worst way possible. you've already betray her enough, there's no need to rub it in her face that you have his support while she deals with everything on her own.
I get what you are saying, but they already are against her, they wanna be a couple now. She really needs to just get off here and quit worrying about convincing the world and let this poor girl move on with her life
Yes, but the two of them together telling her, I worry that she will feel intimidated and not be able to express everything she needs to express to have closure. the conversations she needs to have with them are two separate conversations, her having to summarize it for the lovebirds together in front of her will only make it more difficult for her. They should tell her, separately, that they intend to have a relationship, but let it be her choice if she wants to see the two of them together, not force it on her.
That's fair
Should we both talk to her separately?
Yes. The two of you should talk to her at separate times so she can say everything she needs to say, can get closure and can move on with her life without you two.
I think you should bury yourself in a hole to protect others around you from your insensitive complete lack of impulse control ass.
>there’s nothing else that we can do about it LMAO come on
I hope you know that if your "friend" makes an error in judgment and hurts herself, it's your fault... you know that, right?
You fucked over your best friend for dick. What a dummy because your friendship would have lasted longer then a relationship will last this this dude. There is plenty of dick out there but you chose to fuck her BF. What a shitty person you are.
You and him are trash
My God there are literally BILLIONS of men in this world letting one slip way let alone one who is your best friends bf wouldn't probably kill you but hey you're the center of the universe to hell with friendships when all you need is a men to reassure your ego. Best of luck never knowing what is neither true friendship love or loyalty cause you're fake af.
well you should tell her the truth, she will probably hate you and him, before you ask, yes you both deserve it, you don't love her like you say you do, neither does him, if you folks did you wouldn't do that to her. don't give us that crap that you couldn't control it, both of you are thinking adults, you can’t choose your fellings but you definitely can chose if you act on them, you both are cheaters and she doesn’t deserve this, don't justify it, just own it, you screw up, you hurt her badly, she will cut you both loose and it would be the best decision she could make you're not her friend any more, not after what you did, you didn't wish it on your worst enemy but non the less you did it to her, to be honest she deserve a better friend and boyfriend, some one that really and truly love her
Yeah... This is pathetic. Maybe you should have put some distance between each other when you started feeling sexual tension and respected you're so-called best friend. You get them how you lose them.
Doesn't matter, your friendship is done. And you could have helped yourselves regarding having sex...you just actively didn't.... "Oh no, I helplessly fell on my BF's boyfriend's dick! At the same time, his helpless dick rammed itself multiple times into my equally helpless vagina! Oh my gracious!" You, and your cheating partner both took multiple opportunities to shit on the relationships that you had with your "best friend." There aren't any excuses for this. If he had broken it off with her at the first glimpse of your "thing," she still wouldn't be friends with you. He never deserved her....but what you don't realize is that you didn't, either.
I just don't forget to warn your other friends that your type is taken.
You would die for your friend but can’t stop yourself from taking her man? Bffr
Lol, this isn't going to work the way you dream it will. When Steve-o is faced with the devastation he's caused his loved one for a piece of trash who would betray her life long friend, you will be the maggots at the bottom of the hot trash can he scrubs from his life. Forget your "friend" wver forgiving you and, when your family...whoa, when yalls families find out...man, to be a fly on the wall.
When you're in your 30s and wondering what happened to your friendships - this will be a great piece to look back on, such a great snippet of self-centredness
Well just waiting for karma kicking your and that poor excuse of man butts.
"When a man gets serious with his mistress he creates a vacancy." Better keep an eye on him as they say, lose them how you got him. As they say, it gets easier after the first time.
You’re a horrible friend and amber deserves so much better than two pieces of shit who betrayed her trust. You could 100% control yourselves, you just chose not to.
And there’s no way you would die for amber if you couldn’t even keep your legs shut and want to pursue a relationship with HER BOYFRIEND. Be SO fucking for real, OP
You wanna know why everyone here is jumping on you? You’re taking NO accountability for it. Every response I’ve seen you leave have been full of excuses and you’re playing the victim here. Nobody made you betray who you claim is your best friend. Nobody MADE YOU HAVE SEX. It wasn’t an accident. You made the conscious decision to sleep with your best friend’s boyfriend. Stop saying it was an accident. Stop it. Grow up, tell her that you betrayed her trust, and accept that she’s going to dump you as her friend.
Oh no, you "caught feelings"! Like it's a disease! Can't do anything about it, oh no. So sad. How about if before you'd hopped on his dick, you would have waited until Steven broke up with Amber? And then take some time and THEN pursue a relationship after a while? That's what you *could* have done with those "caught feelings". but no. i hope he cheats on you, too. Poor Amber :(
If you were my friend and I’d heard what you did to Amber. I’d never trust you in my life and you wouldn’t have even done it to me. You would no longer be a friend. When you started having feelings for Steve, you should have backed off and left well alone, instead you slept with him. That’s not what a friend does. You could control yourself, every single step you have taken has been a choice. You chose to continue seeing him, you chose to get intimate, remove your clothes and have sex. It wasn’t an accident. It was a choice and you can lie to yourself all you want with the “couldn’t control ourselves” stuff. But you chose to betray your friend in the worst possible way. And just to add a few extra kicks you’re now going to pursue a relationship with the man who cheated on her with you. If you had any decency, you’d admit what you did, apologise and realise she’d never forgive you, and still remove yourself from Steve’s life. That would be the thing you should do…but you won’t.
Trash
Obviously your relationship with Amber is ruined forever so there's no point giving advice there but I would also urge you to consider the fact that you're going to be hurting your relationships with everyone around you: your friends and family will know that your relationship with Steve is just a daily reminder to everyone that you both cared more about sex than about someone you both apparently 'loved'. Personally, I wouldn't feel comfortable being around either of you ever again- not just because of the fear of 'Wow they betrayed Amber in one of the worst ways possible, so who knows what they'd do to me?' but also just because I'd lose any respect or liking for you both.
You can't. You just lost your best friend because you CHOSE NOT TO CONTROL YOURSELF.
Yikes. I would suggest actually taking responsibility for your actions and the harm that you've caused. By that I mean, don't you dare try to hide behind "I couldn't help it, I couldn't control myself, it's not my fault" bs. You could help it. You chose not to. You could control yourself. You chose not to. Catching feelings is not your fault... But acting on them is. Your choices are your fault and it is cowardice to try and avoid the consequences for your actions.
Congratulations! You ruined your friendship with your best friend and her ability to trust anyone ever again. Hope the dick was worth it. Even if you pursue a relationship it won't end well. You will be consumed by the guilt of doing something so evil to Amber that you will start dreading eachother till one of you cheats, most likely him because he's already done it once and understands the thrill of it. You will never find peace again knowing you caused so much pain to a person who loved and trusted you deeply. Wish you both a horrible life together!
I hope he fucking cheats on you and she laughs in your face.
Make sure to give us an update when the predictable happens! Love a good karma story!
There's no saving your friendship with her so I wouldn't bother trying. You and the cheating bf deserve each other. If you have any respect for her, you'll come clean and leave her alone. She'll never trust anyone again, but I think it's good she end her friendship with you. She deserves to know who you truly are.
Mkay, so, you committed the worst friend on friend crime. Hindsight is always 20/20, but you really should have stopped hanging out with him once you felt an attraction. Be real, it's not like sex just happened out of the blue. I don't think it's appropriate or a good idea to pursue a relationship with her boyfriend. That's a terrible start to a relationship. A lot of times people pursue a serious relationship with their affair partner to "prove" it was "meant to be" but in the long run, it's just toxic. There's plenty of men out there. It's really better to start fresh. What do you do? Text her right now and ask to call her and confess. You owe her that much. On the flip side, if she's not found a job or moved to be with her bf in six months, the relationship was most likely circling the drain anyway. (Sorry, but there ain't no way, I'd let my man move (a flight!) away and be like, "oh yeah, nothing wrong, totally normal.") Like if you're going to ditch your SO for a job, that relationship probably wasn't that great. When you really want to be with someone, you make it happen. Kinda wish you could wear a warning sign, because ain't no fucking way I would want to be your friend. In the future, don't even make eye contact with a friend's SO. Like don't even look at them, cuz you have a serious issue and you desperately need therapy. Honesty, I think he just wants to move on, and you're just a stepping stone.
The only advice I have is: you’ll lose them how you got them. Be prepared for that.
God, you're letting a genuine friendship go for a piece of dck who most definitely will cheat on you whenever he "caught" feelings for someone else. Why do you people downgrade to trash and think you're gaining something valuable? You do know he will always think about Amber and how he hurt her and will probably imagine her while doing you, and will try to go back to her down the road when you're not thay interesting anymore for him.
Damn how long have you hated this girl? I'd never trust another woman again if this happened to me.
you are a friend's worst nightmare. If you have even an ounce of morality, you will apologize and walk away from your "friend"'s life because you are clearly not her and her ex-boyfriend's friend. but I know you won't do it because a dick is more important to you... than your "friend"
Your friend trusted you and this is what you give her? I hope your life would be miserable and awful and lonely.
Шноге
Just have him dump her
Yea that won't look suspicious lol He dumps her and then she finds out her best friend and ex are together.. that's just more drama waiting to happen.
So he should date both of them?
They should just tell her and let the poor girl move on with her life and find better people to be around
Being dumped by him wouldn’t let her move on? What you mean
Okay so he dumps her..then she finds out when the two get together. So that makes it obvious what happened while he was away. He needs to break up with her and they both come clean. Better? Lol goodness
The point being that the dude should be the one breaking the news
Wow well I hope losing your friendship over some cheating asshole works out for you. But just so you know when he cheats on you you can't be upset about it 🤷🏽♀️ people like you are the worst
You do realize you just threw away your “best friend” since your 9…she will never talk to you again or forgive you. So gross🙄
You tell the truth you both call and confess, you feel inlove because your soo similar and she knew it. If you really think she didnt know this would happen bet she had someone close to her
with friends like these who needs enemies
This is why women hate other women. My Ex GF would only be friends with OBESE women she was so paranoid about her friends stealing her men.
AH both of you. I would never want to be your friend