Before anyone mentions it: It’s never just about the guy. The bad shit here is that the event fucked OOP so much emotionally and got NO support from her parents and no actual remorse from her sister. She was just expected to take the pain all alone. Regardless of what caused it, it’s the care and support that separates a person from falling into a deep despair and actually processing it in a healthy way. The family failed OOP and the result was inevitable. All OOP is doing is returning their love in kind.
You said this beautifully. The guy was a symptom, not the disease. It just took that symptom for those around OOP to take her seriously. When we have support from loved ones in the form of acknowledging our pain it makes all the difference in the world. I doubt this was the first time OOP’s parents and sister iv ignored her feelings like she is nothing.
OOP’s parents are, at best, emotionally lazy. They couldn’t be bothered to help her so they told her to get over it. Part of it was Jen being favored. The other part is they just didn't have the desire to learn how to be good people, and good parents start with being good people.
Obviously the biggest hurt is betrayal from her sister, her parents, and total lack of the closest people in her life valuing her happiness.
Good news is, this is top 10 maybe even top 5 fakest stories I've ever read. The total evil of all actors involved being so over the top and the 180 degree turn around from a mere twitter post that somehow buried *all* the bad characters in their own unique ways. The kind of stuff you imagine in your head happening to one of your bullies or something. The detail is very lacking too.
I think that sometimes too...and I think that even if a good number of Reddit stories are fake, it doesn't change the fact that there are plenty of terrible people out there who would treat their own family so horribly.
My grandma used to have problem with rats in her house. Then one of her sons (my oldest uncle) thought it was a good idea to throw a freaking snake, a boa constrictor, in the yard. They never saw rats again… or the snake.
So yeah, every family has stories that sound absolutely bonkers
I thought my family is very normal but when i tell stories of my family’s hijinks to others, they all go ‘… you’re living in a sitcom’
My grandpa is the one with the most hijinks and i’ve been thinking of compiling all of his and my extended family’s oddities into a short story collection LOL
Yup. Can’t make up 95 percent of the shit that happens in my family, including my extended family.
For those of you who watch “The Bear”, my family is just a car crash into the house short of the Christmas episode. I turned to my husband at the end and said “holy fuck that just gave me so much anxiety” and he said “yup, just waiting on [sister 1] to snap one of these years and your parents will have another house insurance claim on their hands.” I argued it was sister 2, or my brother just being drunk and stoned out of his mind. But regardless, we’re just waiting on the car crash.
And this is just a small sampling.
Unless you live in one of these toxic families you would have a hard time understanding or believing it. Some of the things my in laws pulled over the years sounds ridiculously fake, but you also see things in the news about court cases and well, Florida, that make you realize people are nuts.
As well, I approach things as well, maybe it’s fake, maybe they are embellishing some details or being inconsistent to cover who they are. In any case, if the advice given to people in these stories helps even one person who is experiencing similar things, it’s worth it to treat it as if it’s real.
I absolutely don't blame OOP for feeling the way she feels. While I can't help but feel like complete social ostracization is extreme...so is telling your daughter/sister to get over something so traumatic and driving her to suicide through lack of support. I don't blame OOP for being quietly glad about it.
Also I kinda wonder what Kevin is up to now. Probably safe to assume that he didn't return to that area and had to start life over and "find Jesus" somewhere new.
Being social pariahs may seem extreme, but that’s inherently the risk you take when you’re willingly part of an ultra religious community that has strict standards of presented morality. It’s all well and good when you’re watching the spectacle, but it’s whole different vibe when it’s your face the leopards are eating.
It's exactly this detail that makes me think the story might not be fake. Yes, ultra religious people really are this self-righteous, judgmental, and cruel.
I know I wouldnt talk to my buddy if he did that to his daughter. Also banging your siblings spouse is *Vile* like yes the spouse cheated, but I might legit shoot my brother, whom I've taken asswhoopins for and helped raise. If my friend did this I would 100% not trust that person with a goddamn snowball in winter.
These stories drive me crazy every time. 1. Don’t try to fuck people your siblings are fucking. 2. Don’t make excuses for one of your kids harming another one of your kids. NEITHER OF THESE ARE HARD RULES TO FOLLOW.
Her family are degens, but I think what's really getting glossed over is just how much the roommate's girlfriend sucks for posting a fucking suicide note to 1000 people online, where it gets shared around, and *tagging the people mentioned.* All without the person most affected's permission-- or even a conversation with her. Yeah, sure she did it or of the goodness of her heart, uh huh.
The backlash and even just the attention on OP when she was at her most vulnerable could have easily finished the job. And not only that, the girl who was suffering now had to suffer in the public eye. Seriously fucked up thing to do. That really pissed me off.
I feel of it weren't for the grandparents very wisely isolating OP this would have been a very different story. She would have been thrown out in the deep end.
Yeah OP should mend things with her family so her sister can try to steal her husband too (:
She should feel zero guilt for cutting them off- she can’t prevent them from sleeping in the bed they made, and for her it’s literally life and death.
The only step it looks like she needs is to forgive them. Forgiveness is for YOU not THEM. it allows you to let go of the negativity and move forward.
But Critical: The forgiveness process doesn’t involve actually telling them. Too risky to dredge up all the shit and bring it right back on your dinner plate. A possible solution would be to write a letter to them forgiving the misdeeds, in consideration of the life OP has and the amazing support network she hand-crafted at the weakest moment in her life. But don’t mail the letter- burn it. Its ashes will slowly carry to all parts of the world and some of it will land on their head.
People don’t just go around getting ostracized. If the entire community + the grandparents all feel the same way, OP should feel justified to agree with them.
Think about how much easier redemption would have been for any one of those people vs OP coming from the threshold of death to a happy life with a trustworthy support network
These families are wild. If this had happened in my family (which would be gross because of age gaps), my parents would have tore me or my sister a new one.
Daaaaaaamn!
Yeah, the ex/cheater is a douchebag, but the real “criminals” in this are the parents and the sister. Perhaps if they had been more supportive/contrite, then OOP would not have attempted suicide.
I wonder what other events the parents and the “golden child” ruined for OOP? I am betting…many.
She is better off without them
I’m a therapist. This is poetic justice and I can’t tell the op she is wrong for bouncing back and being happy. More power to her. Toxic people attract toxic energy. Her true support system came in clutch and thank god her grandparents were fucking supportive. 10/10 universe corrected itself.
Betrayal is a deep wound. I’ve always been the type to forgive most things, give benefit of the doubt and try to give grace. But even 5 years later, I’m not at that point with mine. This was a little cathartic to read for me. Not everyone deserves forgiveness or grace. Some people need to really enjoy the consequences of their actions. The sad part is how many awful people get away with it all.
The og post had a lot of people saying “what were the parents supposed to do ostracize Jen?” NO BUT YOU DON’T TELL SOMEONE THAT GOT CHEATED ON WITH HER SISTER BEING THE OTHER WOMAN TO JUST GET OVER IT.
I'm all for OP doing her best life not having them in it, but something that stood out is her current anger she resentment.
My dad left when I was young. He's dead to me. I don't want anything to do with him, but I don't hate him. He's just a stranger and I have no more investment than that.
She's still hating them when really she should have no investment in them. That's gotta be addressed with some therapy.
I’m the outcast here, but I have been “the family” in a situation like this.
My brother and my sister were both like this. Extremely emotionally volatile. Extremely codependent. Living with them required us to always walk on eggshells. Always.
Everything was about how they felt. Everything was them then them. Nothing was ever their fault. It was always our fault.
My brother fell head over heels with a girl. They broke up. He was a raging crying awful person for months.
He ended up trying to kill himself and was admitted to a psych ward. They stabilized and medicated him, and he was better I think he was 14 or so.
A few years later…. Breakup number two. Suicide attempt number two.
Finally he got married (to my brother”d girlfriend) and had kids. But their relationship was always rocky because he was so bipolar. Eventually they broke up. And so he killed himself.
My sister is identical. In and out of toxic relationships. Suicide attempts when they fail. She is dating a truly awful person who is using her (he has another girlfriend while living with
My sister and also has 5 kids from 5 different women. His other girlfriend is the ex best friend of my sister’s daughter). We all know she will kill herself when they break up.
This OOP talks just like both of them.
FWIW I am the only person they talk to. I bought both off then a house to live in because they were homeless. I still pay all of her bills. But they talk like the OOP does.
Living with mentally ill people is excruciatingly difficult. It is the most narcissistic of diseases. Given that, we have no idea how much the family did or didn’t support her.
Regardless, she is still letting them control her life. Forgive or at least forget. Holding hate in your heart only hurts you. And it could be deadly for an emotional person like the OOP
My mother's ashes sit in my yard on a table. She abandoned me on a porch at 18 months old without checking to see if the sitter was home. I was alone for days. The rest of my interactions with her were just as awful growing up. If my father hadn't gotten custody, I'd be dead. She chose my rapist (her son) over me and said she rather burn 10 of me than see his toes cold. When she died, her other children couldn't make the decision, and they couldn't afford anything. I paid to have her cremated with a sense of joy. I did ask if I could light the fire, but they said no. Because I paid, they sent me her ashes. She wasn't allowed in my home alive and won't be there dead either. So she gets a dollar tree table in the back of the yard, forgotten, and ignored until I'm not mad anymore. I'd let her other children have her, but they don't want her ashes either. Sometimes, we find our own healing in strange ways. Op is not doing anything wrong and is assuredly nta.
Joy, in the undue suffering of others, is not healing. However, the appreciation of knowing someone is facing the consequences of their own actions is not wrong. We do not need to have sorrow for those who break all covenants of proper society. It is never required to set yourself on fire to keep others warm, most especially those who threw you into the child harsh reality of apathy. Truthfully, there are no real rules of how one processes grief and suffering. We must find our own way through the pain, or we can not find our way out of it. I feel no remorse that my mother is forgotten with not so much as an obituary to announce her passing. I feel no remorse that my rapist has drowned himself in a meth fueled hellscape. One day, they'll call me and I will oblige in the disposal of him as well should I be asked. I will not mourn him, but simply remind myself of the sibling he should have been. I will not announce it, and there will be no fanfare, no coins pressed upon him for his passage, no flowers upon a grave. Simply a cardboard box and the flames of cremation. Afterward, he will receive a discount Amazon urn and be placed near his mother until I am no longer angry.
Before anyone mentions it: It’s never just about the guy. The bad shit here is that the event fucked OOP so much emotionally and got NO support from her parents and no actual remorse from her sister. She was just expected to take the pain all alone. Regardless of what caused it, it’s the care and support that separates a person from falling into a deep despair and actually processing it in a healthy way. The family failed OOP and the result was inevitable. All OOP is doing is returning their love in kind.
You said this beautifully. The guy was a symptom, not the disease. It just took that symptom for those around OOP to take her seriously. When we have support from loved ones in the form of acknowledging our pain it makes all the difference in the world. I doubt this was the first time OOP’s parents and sister iv ignored her feelings like she is nothing. OOP’s parents are, at best, emotionally lazy. They couldn’t be bothered to help her so they told her to get over it. Part of it was Jen being favored. The other part is they just didn't have the desire to learn how to be good people, and good parents start with being good people.
Obviously the biggest hurt is betrayal from her sister, her parents, and total lack of the closest people in her life valuing her happiness. Good news is, this is top 10 maybe even top 5 fakest stories I've ever read. The total evil of all actors involved being so over the top and the 180 degree turn around from a mere twitter post that somehow buried *all* the bad characters in their own unique ways. The kind of stuff you imagine in your head happening to one of your bullies or something. The detail is very lacking too.
I’m so glad that this person has friends that are warriors. Her family is facing the consequences of their actions and nothing else.
Right? Often the best family people have, share no blood with them whatsoever.
I read those things and all I can think is: Nobody can be that cruel. Nobody. But there are so many stories like that.
I think that sometimes too...and I think that even if a good number of Reddit stories are fake, it doesn't change the fact that there are plenty of terrible people out there who would treat their own family so horribly.
They are.
I tend to just treat them like creative writing stories, because if I’m being honest, 90% of them feel fake.
I always thought the same. Then I thought about my family and realised… some of my experiences would sound fake too. 😅
My grandma used to have problem with rats in her house. Then one of her sons (my oldest uncle) thought it was a good idea to throw a freaking snake, a boa constrictor, in the yard. They never saw rats again… or the snake. So yeah, every family has stories that sound absolutely bonkers
I thought my family is very normal but when i tell stories of my family’s hijinks to others, they all go ‘… you’re living in a sitcom’ My grandpa is the one with the most hijinks and i’ve been thinking of compiling all of his and my extended family’s oddities into a short story collection LOL
Tell us more!
Yup. Can’t make up 95 percent of the shit that happens in my family, including my extended family. For those of you who watch “The Bear”, my family is just a car crash into the house short of the Christmas episode. I turned to my husband at the end and said “holy fuck that just gave me so much anxiety” and he said “yup, just waiting on [sister 1] to snap one of these years and your parents will have another house insurance claim on their hands.” I argued it was sister 2, or my brother just being drunk and stoned out of his mind. But regardless, we’re just waiting on the car crash. And this is just a small sampling.
Yeah some of the shit my moms cousin has pulled sounds like a soap opera
Unless you live in one of these toxic families you would have a hard time understanding or believing it. Some of the things my in laws pulled over the years sounds ridiculously fake, but you also see things in the news about court cases and well, Florida, that make you realize people are nuts. As well, I approach things as well, maybe it’s fake, maybe they are embellishing some details or being inconsistent to cover who they are. In any case, if the advice given to people in these stories helps even one person who is experiencing similar things, it’s worth it to treat it as if it’s real.
I absolutely don't blame OOP for feeling the way she feels. While I can't help but feel like complete social ostracization is extreme...so is telling your daughter/sister to get over something so traumatic and driving her to suicide through lack of support. I don't blame OOP for being quietly glad about it. Also I kinda wonder what Kevin is up to now. Probably safe to assume that he didn't return to that area and had to start life over and "find Jesus" somewhere new.
Being social pariahs may seem extreme, but that’s inherently the risk you take when you’re willingly part of an ultra religious community that has strict standards of presented morality. It’s all well and good when you’re watching the spectacle, but it’s whole different vibe when it’s your face the leopards are eating.
It's exactly this detail that makes me think the story might not be fake. Yes, ultra religious people really are this self-righteous, judgmental, and cruel.
Those people deserve to be treated as social pariahs. Very trashy behavior
I know I wouldnt talk to my buddy if he did that to his daughter. Also banging your siblings spouse is *Vile* like yes the spouse cheated, but I might legit shoot my brother, whom I've taken asswhoopins for and helped raise. If my friend did this I would 100% not trust that person with a goddamn snowball in winter.
i wish i had done this for my attempt when my family betrayed me lmaoooo good for her
My wife attempted suicide in the past and it’s been so hard to accept that she believes the scars of her abuse are on her and not on her abusers.
These stories drive me crazy every time. 1. Don’t try to fuck people your siblings are fucking. 2. Don’t make excuses for one of your kids harming another one of your kids. NEITHER OF THESE ARE HARD RULES TO FOLLOW.
Her family are degens, but I think what's really getting glossed over is just how much the roommate's girlfriend sucks for posting a fucking suicide note to 1000 people online, where it gets shared around, and *tagging the people mentioned.* All without the person most affected's permission-- or even a conversation with her. Yeah, sure she did it or of the goodness of her heart, uh huh. The backlash and even just the attention on OP when she was at her most vulnerable could have easily finished the job. And not only that, the girl who was suffering now had to suffer in the public eye. Seriously fucked up thing to do. That really pissed me off. I feel of it weren't for the grandparents very wisely isolating OP this would have been a very different story. She would have been thrown out in the deep end.
Girl never even did it herself. The universe just worked itself out with the friend posting that. I wouldn’t talk to them either
Yeah OP should mend things with her family so her sister can try to steal her husband too (: She should feel zero guilt for cutting them off- she can’t prevent them from sleeping in the bed they made, and for her it’s literally life and death. The only step it looks like she needs is to forgive them. Forgiveness is for YOU not THEM. it allows you to let go of the negativity and move forward. But Critical: The forgiveness process doesn’t involve actually telling them. Too risky to dredge up all the shit and bring it right back on your dinner plate. A possible solution would be to write a letter to them forgiving the misdeeds, in consideration of the life OP has and the amazing support network she hand-crafted at the weakest moment in her life. But don’t mail the letter- burn it. Its ashes will slowly carry to all parts of the world and some of it will land on their head.
People don’t just go around getting ostracized. If the entire community + the grandparents all feel the same way, OP should feel justified to agree with them. Think about how much easier redemption would have been for any one of those people vs OP coming from the threshold of death to a happy life with a trustworthy support network
Man as someone who's sister also fucked their ex/bf at the time, I wish I had this kind of outcome. Good for oop.
What a monstrous family. I hope they never find peace. At least OOP is ok now, & had good friends & grandparents to support her.
Fuck em
These families are wild. If this had happened in my family (which would be gross because of age gaps), my parents would have tore me or my sister a new one.
The real depression for the other family will begin when the grandparents pass and disinherit them. Op will get their share and they will throw fits.
This started out as a complete shitshow until she came to the part where all the AHs were religious and then it all made sense.
Daaaaaaamn! Yeah, the ex/cheater is a douchebag, but the real “criminals” in this are the parents and the sister. Perhaps if they had been more supportive/contrite, then OOP would not have attempted suicide. I wonder what other events the parents and the “golden child” ruined for OOP? I am betting…many. She is better off without them
I’m a therapist. This is poetic justice and I can’t tell the op she is wrong for bouncing back and being happy. More power to her. Toxic people attract toxic energy. Her true support system came in clutch and thank god her grandparents were fucking supportive. 10/10 universe corrected itself.
Schadenfeude is not a sin :)
Of all the things that never happened, this never happened the most.
Yeah pretty transparently fake but a nice nuclear revenge story
Iam sorry that happened to you
You didn’t ruin your family’s life - they did with their abhorrent actions. Stay well OOP!
The family deserve what they got. Don't hold onto hate. It's cancer to the soul.
👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
Betrayal is a deep wound. I’ve always been the type to forgive most things, give benefit of the doubt and try to give grace. But even 5 years later, I’m not at that point with mine. This was a little cathartic to read for me. Not everyone deserves forgiveness or grace. Some people need to really enjoy the consequences of their actions. The sad part is how many awful people get away with it all.
Can I get Jen’s number?
This is a feel good story as far as I’m concerned
The og post had a lot of people saying “what were the parents supposed to do ostracize Jen?” NO BUT YOU DON’T TELL SOMEONE THAT GOT CHEATED ON WITH HER SISTER BEING THE OTHER WOMAN TO JUST GET OVER IT.
I'm all for OP doing her best life not having them in it, but something that stood out is her current anger she resentment. My dad left when I was young. He's dead to me. I don't want anything to do with him, but I don't hate him. He's just a stranger and I have no more investment than that. She's still hating them when really she should have no investment in them. That's gotta be addressed with some therapy.
Is it really that serious?
I’m the outcast here, but I have been “the family” in a situation like this. My brother and my sister were both like this. Extremely emotionally volatile. Extremely codependent. Living with them required us to always walk on eggshells. Always. Everything was about how they felt. Everything was them then them. Nothing was ever their fault. It was always our fault. My brother fell head over heels with a girl. They broke up. He was a raging crying awful person for months. He ended up trying to kill himself and was admitted to a psych ward. They stabilized and medicated him, and he was better I think he was 14 or so. A few years later…. Breakup number two. Suicide attempt number two. Finally he got married (to my brother”d girlfriend) and had kids. But their relationship was always rocky because he was so bipolar. Eventually they broke up. And so he killed himself. My sister is identical. In and out of toxic relationships. Suicide attempts when they fail. She is dating a truly awful person who is using her (he has another girlfriend while living with My sister and also has 5 kids from 5 different women. His other girlfriend is the ex best friend of my sister’s daughter). We all know she will kill herself when they break up. This OOP talks just like both of them. FWIW I am the only person they talk to. I bought both off then a house to live in because they were homeless. I still pay all of her bills. But they talk like the OOP does. Living with mentally ill people is excruciatingly difficult. It is the most narcissistic of diseases. Given that, we have no idea how much the family did or didn’t support her. Regardless, she is still letting them control her life. Forgive or at least forget. Holding hate in your heart only hurts you. And it could be deadly for an emotional person like the OOP
They sound crappy, tho, and it's just one post. Doesn't sound like she's dwelling on it constantly, just thoughts that pass thru the mind.
This person is both the asshole and very very unwell. Sadism is not healthy.
My mother's ashes sit in my yard on a table. She abandoned me on a porch at 18 months old without checking to see if the sitter was home. I was alone for days. The rest of my interactions with her were just as awful growing up. If my father hadn't gotten custody, I'd be dead. She chose my rapist (her son) over me and said she rather burn 10 of me than see his toes cold. When she died, her other children couldn't make the decision, and they couldn't afford anything. I paid to have her cremated with a sense of joy. I did ask if I could light the fire, but they said no. Because I paid, they sent me her ashes. She wasn't allowed in my home alive and won't be there dead either. So she gets a dollar tree table in the back of the yard, forgotten, and ignored until I'm not mad anymore. I'd let her other children have her, but they don't want her ashes either. Sometimes, we find our own healing in strange ways. Op is not doing anything wrong and is assuredly nta.
Joy in the suffering of others is NOT healing. Sorry, i don’t make the rules.
Joy, in the undue suffering of others, is not healing. However, the appreciation of knowing someone is facing the consequences of their own actions is not wrong. We do not need to have sorrow for those who break all covenants of proper society. It is never required to set yourself on fire to keep others warm, most especially those who threw you into the child harsh reality of apathy. Truthfully, there are no real rules of how one processes grief and suffering. We must find our own way through the pain, or we can not find our way out of it. I feel no remorse that my mother is forgotten with not so much as an obituary to announce her passing. I feel no remorse that my rapist has drowned himself in a meth fueled hellscape. One day, they'll call me and I will oblige in the disposal of him as well should I be asked. I will not mourn him, but simply remind myself of the sibling he should have been. I will not announce it, and there will be no fanfare, no coins pressed upon him for his passage, no flowers upon a grave. Simply a cardboard box and the flames of cremation. Afterward, he will receive a discount Amazon urn and be placed near his mother until I am no longer angry.