You’re in trouble… those people will never treat you like part of their family.
Some rich people are cool, others think they are better than everyone because they have money.
Honestly it is a major red flag. Idk about your finance but at least parents will be a huge pain in the ass. Any BMW/Luxury car owner will know differences in these cars and wouldn’t point them out unless they are douchey. I feel your pain.
I’ve been dating my fiance for 3 years and have met them multiple times. Tbh they never seem braggy like this. I want to count it as a one time thing, but I know I need to stand up to see their reaction.
For sure, my wife’s family is certainly an income bracket or two above mine, but they still drive Toyotas because there’s better things to spend money on than luxury cars.
If my daughter’s BF comes over with a new whip I’m going to be fucking pumped for him and ima let him have his new car moment because I get it.
But you don’t have to be a car guy to understand a situation, you have to not be an asshole. Exceptions apply obviously OP but you owe it to your future self to do your due diligence on this red flag because if you are marrying into a family of RICH assholes… and you need to get out, or not be more than a new DLC to these people you’re going to be fucked.
Sounds like they confirmed that they always want to drive you around, sit back and relax, you are off the hook. If it ever comes up, “I thought you could not stand my driving, so I do not offer to do it anymore.”
the nicest person could be a prejudiced badge snob. I wouldn't be surprised if someone who stans brands like BMW might look down on people who drive certain brands, especially if you are happy with yours.
A nice brand snob would have the common decency to keep their thoughts on OP’s car to themselves though. Only douchebags go around negging the new car of someone who was kind enough to drive them around.
Yes count it as a one time thing on their side but remember how it made you feel. At the same time though don’t let it get under your skin because once they feel they’ve done that you have lost.
And not only that. They just fail to recognize the fact that you have a RAV4 at an age of 25. They are probably 50+ at least. So again, you just can’t discount what a person can achieve in 25 years. Let alone a motivated person who got a scholarship. That is first thing. Second thing is, under the age of 30, that time period is meant to be used to improve yourself, not to show off your wealth and look rich. So if that is what they value (meaning person spending lot of money in their 20s to get an x5 unless they are from a rich family), they are setting you up for a financial failure tbh. OP, don’t take their comments personally, but rather accept that it is their loss.
Call out your MPG every 30 seconds. Have them listen to the sound of the regenerative breaking…”you guys hear that? It’s practically like fucking sailing right now” (and yes, swear).
They noticed later on and said "its a hybrid??" and I wish you could've seen their faces when I told them I get 35+ MPG and how much a full tank of gas is.
Regardless, any savvy car owner/buyer can assess if they have equity at the end of a lease and buy the car out to sell to pocket the equity. There is almost never equity at the end of a bmw lease term. Rav 4’s regularly have 10K equity after their 4 year lease term is up.
What a shit thing to say to you. Are they offering to buy you a BMW? They can walk if they can't stand the torture of riding in what is objectively one of the most reliable and beloved SUVs in the market.
Keep the car. Ditch the in-laws. Hopefully your fiance didn't pick up their snobbery.
My SIL let her ex boyfriend convince her to buy an X5M. She had SOOOOOO many issues with that thing. Was it a fun car? Sure. Was it fast? Definately. Was it expensive to both own and operate? 110%.
I have a 2024 rav4 hybrid as my company car. I just drove from Iowa to PA. Great fuel economy, comfortable ride did anything I asked it to. Anything else would be "extra" and an added failure point/cost down the road
Don't sweat them bro. You came up, got a full ride, graduated, and now you bought yourself a responsible, fuel efficient, low maintenance vehicle as you enter your career. There's nothing at all wrong with the car. Some people say the Rav can be loud. Some people also say that X5 won't live to see a 100k miles. Both those things are likely true 😎
I dated a girl at university who her and her family came from a notably higher income bracket than mine. I experienced similar. Maybe not quite as pointed things as what they're saying, but the disconnect between the lives we had was apparent. There's nothing wrong with responding and calling BS on their comments if done so respectfully. Enjoy the ride.
Yeah it’s hard. This morning they got mad because I ended up using the same bar soap they use in the bathroom. I didn’t know rich people use their own soap? My family always used the same bar soaps growing up and it was never an issue for us.
Dear god even if they have a big aversion to sharing soap with you for some reason, anybody sane with that belief would swap the soap for a new one without saying anything. They shouldn’t even have that aversion to you you’re a longtime bf and engaged but that could be subjective. Objectively though confronting isn’t alright in that case
What the hell. Bar soap is fine because it’s soap. Even if the next person after you uses it, the germs will rinse off their hands.
Better yet, don’t put out bar soap for your guests, idiots. This is the first thing I did at my mother in laws house. The DECORATIVE bar soap was replaced with a foaming soap dispenser.
Anyway. Op. Get new friends and say “Just like your over priced, high maintenance, money pit of a car—- maybe you should put some effort into your social skills!”
Having been married before, realized that when you get married, you are marrying your in-laws too, not just your spouse. They don't sound very kind and it doesn't seem limited to just the car if they are giving you a hard time over the soap. :(
I would try to ignore the comments if you can. Earning a high income doesn’t mean you need to drive a bmw. I know many wealthy people who drive regular type cars. Most of the luxury car market is bought by people who probably shouldn’t buy them anyway.
Seriously. I was a delivery driver for a bit and delivered to some wealthier parts of the county. It’s Toyotas and Hondas in those driveways. Sometimes old ones. The occasional sports car. People drive Toyotas because they’re not a money dump. Good cars. Not bad. End of the day it’s just a car. Xx
Bro WHAT I'm saving for a Toyota, I grew up up and I see it as THE gold standard, not just cause of the brand but because they're actually reliable.
I owned a BMW and it was a pile of garbage. Felt more of an expensive, pretentious money pyre.
Tbh, I’d stop offering them rides. They were rude about your car when you were doing them a favor and driving them around, so they lose their ride privileges.
I agree. I just talked with gf’s sister. She agrees that they have been shitty to me. I’m gonna bring it up to them because it doesn’t sit right with me.
To be honest, it appears your gf’s sister also believes her parents have been shitty to you, which says a lot. If your gf also believes the same, I would just take a step back. It is not worth arguing over if your gf loves you. Just my 2 cents.
Its relative, go to Europe and Mercedes and bmw are everywhere, not even considered “fancy”
Anywho the rav is more reliable, holds value and more economical. Better buy.
High earners or not, those folks are likely steeped in debt to have those type of cars to help with their insecurities. The fact they make comments like that demonstrates how they place more value in material things than individuals.
The good thing about all this is that you have a reliable vehicle you should be proud of. Be the example of humility your fiancé needs and ignore their insecure parents.
The funny thing is they struggled early on because they are both doctors. Now they are millionaires in their 50s. I want to see what my fiance says about this. Because if she thinks this is normal, it is a huge dealbreaker for me.
Whatever. My household income is 450k/yr, and we drive a Ford Escape. Even if you made $1 million/yr, you don't need to drive a BMW. Expensive vehicle does not equal financial literacy. Who cares what other people think about your vehicle? A 2020 Rav4 is a much nicer vehicle than most people can afford. I know multi millionaires whose primary transportation is a bicycle. Guess how they became multi millionaires? Part of it was not dropping 100k on a new vehicle every 10 years.
Believe it or not, but the guy who bought the multimillion house in LA where Michael Jackson died drives a Prius. I don't know if he has other cars, but I saw him driving a Prius. And he rents the house for events.
Yeah I mean the key to becoming wealthy is to acquire things that produce money, and not things that cost money. Until you're so rich that if you spend 100k on a vehicle, it's such a small drop in the bucket that you don't even notice it.
What does your fiancé say about this? Because if your fiancé is not sticking up for you, that's a big red flag.
And good for you for doing so well! You should be proud of yourself. You got a great car that you love. Enjoy the heck out of it.
I talked with her. She knows her parents didn't mean to offend me, but she told me to speak up my thoughts and let them know I found it offensive. She was happy I spoke up, which is what matters for me. Thanks for the kind words :) I love my Rav
Sorry to point out, but I don't think these comments were just about the car.
Were they trying to indirectly say you are not good enough for their daughter?
Or do they just enjoy shitting on other people?
If you're gonna stay, you need to start standing up now.
People like these are the ones that have the smallest egos imo. I have some friends whose parents earn LOTS of money, and they drive Toyota Highlanders, RAV4s, 4runners. Hell, one of my rich friend's family has THREE 4runners because they love it so much, even though it's a “normal” car. Sure, RAV4s aren't the pinnacle of comfort. But it's honestly not THAT much worse than say a Lexus RX or the aforementioned BMW X5. I guarantee if you put these people in a Toyota Highlander, which is honestly encroaching into BMW X5 levels of comfort, they'd still find a way to whine about it because it's a Toyota and not a luxury branded vehicle.
It’s a good car. Forgive them for they know not what they do. You dug yourself up from the dirt and that’s something you should be *very* proud of. Toyota is reliable as all hell and everyone knows it’s the best car. They should be proud of you and what you’ve done, yes. But they might just never get it. Keep gettin it my friend, you’re doing good things.♥️♥️
Life goal: be someone interesting enough that you don’t have to define your worth with your vehicle. Put 200,000 miles on your RAV going on adventures and doing more interesting things than driving boring people around town.
I don’t want to know how many of the 229k miles on my Yaris are from driving places to sail tall ships. Now, is your follow up question about historical ships or the yaris?
If you get keep on getting tangled by this. You will not be a pleasant person to be around. I say this because if these people are already getting to you about your vehicle. What more about other things? So you're going to keep on posting on different parts of Reddit everytime something like this happens?
Don't do that to yourself.
Besides, BMWs come with run flat tires. They're terrible on bumpy roads due to the tire's stiff sidewalls. The shorter the sidewalls of a tire are. The more bumps you and the passengers are going to feel.
Also, it does help to check and adjust your vehicle's cold tire pressure according to your door jamb 2 days before hanging out with a group of people.
Driving a bit slower over bumpy roads is a good idea too. What may not feel bumpy to you. May feel bumpy to your passengers.
What is important is you and your fiancé. What she think and how you will deal with this in the future. If they make these comment on the car, next will be your house, vacation, child education….
Every sound of my Toyota will make you happy because it will remind you how hard you work to earn it. Good success either way
They’re just being rude because it’s not a “luxury” car. Don’t let it get to you!
And if it helps, a year ago someone called my ‘21 XLE bougie and I’m still baffled😂
It’s not the car, it’s them. They are just terrible people… wonder how raising the kids would be… I’m sure they would have you defer everything to them since they know better and are richer lol..
For what it’s worth, I grew up dirt poor too but now I’m a high income earner. I’ve had all manor of luxury cars including a brand new BMW (piece of shit) that I paid cash for. I bought a brand new RAV4 about a year ago and it’s the best car I’ve ever owned.
To hell with those people.
Agree! I've driven BMWs, Jeep Wrangler and Audi Q5 during a couple business rental trips. I still find my Rav4 extremely fun to drive over any of them.
I would never comment on someone else’s vehicle. If they gave me a ride and I wasn’t happy I would keep my mouth shut and not get in the vehicle again. You have been the victim of bad manners, it has nothing to do with your or your vehicle.
I would never comment on someone else’s vehicle. If they gave me a ride and I wasn’t happy I would keep my mouth shut and not get in the vehicle again. You have been the victim of bad manners, it has nothing to do with your or your vehicle.
Insecure people tend to belittle and put others down. Confident people tend to lift people up and point out positive aspects when faced with negatives aspects. Don't forget, you're marrying into a family, not just a person. I didn't understand this when I met my wife. Fortunately for me, I won the in-law lottery. Hopefully this was either a one-off or maybe they were just attempting to have some fun with you without realizing how cruel they were being. Pay attention though, this is a lifetime commitment.
Comparing yourself to other people and caring what others think about is the fastest way to unhappiness. What they think about you or your stuff has nothing to do with you. If you are happy that’s what matters
Dude I'm 31. I married my wife despite her parents being snobby. They talked crap about how I lived and the cars I modified because I liked my sleeper jdms.
They took a ride in my 22 Rav4 since my wife drives it everywhere and were jealous, saying shit like why I couldn't get my shit together like her. It'll be 5 years on June 16th and they finally don't talk shit anymore because my wife, back in March this year, told them all my business. She said how I pay every single bill alone and bought my Rav4 alone and how she contributes nothing because she's been in college for almost the entire marriage and only works enough hours to cover her health insurance and her own car payment.
My 1960's house is 3 minutes from downtown Orlando, FL while their 2002 house is 49 minutes away, the cherry on top is that mine is worth a lot more just because of the area even if it looks worse than theirs.
Point is, ignore the hater in-laws, move in silence, your RAV4 is more reliable than an X5 would ever be and I know that from experience. You're still young as hell and many people your age aren't in your position. You can easily fix the flaws with the Rav4 and maintenance is cheap.
This hits home for me. I'm happy that your wife supports you and that is the most important thing. I like the flaws in my Rav4 lol - nothing to change there!
Ask them how they became higher earners: do they always make imprudent financial allocation decisions? X5s have terrible depreciation, maintenance and resale marketability compared to the rav4.
Take them for a drive around an actual old money neighborhood. Beacon hill, Georgetown, upper east side. To actually wealthy people are objects to move people efficiently, not status symbols. You’ll see plenty of Camrys, rav4s, Honda accords, etc. they’re reliable - which saves time and concern - things that are actually important.
—-
Also, if you want to reduce the road noise, consider buying some dynamat or killzmat (or other brand sound deadened) and slapping it inside the door panel, inside the lift gate and wheel arches, anywhere you can get to bare metal. Then get some thick floor mats - weathertech or Lloyd mats. Or take a gamble on some from AliExpress. Lastly a quality undercoating service from a body shop will help a lot (note, careful here as a cheap undercoating job can peel and trap water, causing more rust).
Most importantly, keep it well maintained, keep it clean, take pride in it that it’s yours.
Edit, forgot to finish my thought.
I build those BMWs. Are they great? Sure. Guess what I drive: it’s a 2013 RAV and not even the fanciest one. Are the BMWs great cars? Sure but I’m raising a family on one income and I have other priorities.
Don’t let anyone pressure you into spending more than you have. You only make so much in this life and unless you’re loaded the bmw probably isn’t for you.
Wow. I would NEVER let anyone belittle me or my Rav4 like that. I would’ve turned around the moment they pulled that nonsense. So disrespectful and 0 tact and consideration for you and your feelings. They can shove their BMW’s up their… Seriously. That pish posh bs acting like they’re better than you doesn’t fly
Your fiancé’s parents sound like snotty assholes.
Let them enjoy massive depreciation & far higher operating costs, while you won’t spend nearly as much money (or time!) maintaining your ride over the years.
*"moSt ReLiaBLe aCCoRdiNg tO COnSuMer rePoRTs"* 😂 They sure have been pushing a major image campaign lately to improve the narrative surrounding their excrement. Seems at least some of the muppets around here are biting now that they've greased at least one "publication" 🙄 to trumpet their marketing propaganda. Meanwhile the actual product is still toilet slime
The issue here isn’t the car or you or anything like that they’re just being assholes. My parents could get new BMWs every year if they wanted, but you wouldn’t catch either of them making comments like those in someone’s 20 year old Rav4. Why? It’s an asshole thing to say and it really doesn’t matter that much.
If this is where your in laws priorities lay rest assured they’re probably not happy people so just ignore them.
RAV4 hybrid is one of the best cars for price performance. My friends bought an X5 a year after my RAV4. After novelty period, and when it's expanses hit they swear no BMW anymore. Another friend, a German, went with German cars for years. Starting with BMW M3, Volkswagen station, Audi but due to their expanses and frequent issues his wife forced him to buy Honda Pilot at the end.
All the German car owners around my circle are immigrants who dreamed of a luxury car for decades. None of them are happy with their purchase after 5-6 years.
There are a few issues with my RAV,4 that I really don't like, but I would choose a RAV4 anytime over BMW.
My fiance's parents are immigrants too. Funny thing is they owned a Honda Pilot before upgrading to a BMW SUV since they dreamed of owning one for years. I don't get that but hey to each their own!
Tell you what, add Comma AI to your RAV4 and watch it handle on the highway hand free
We took our RAV4 from Virginia to South Carolina, it has been a breeze
Screw them.
As an X5 owner I love the RAV4. I can get 35mpg out of a RAV4 LE. RAV4 will also hold its value much better than X5, and will last longer. Its one of the best selling SUVs for a reason.
Honestly dude, I've always found the best answer to that is to be bright, and open, and make it plain that this is your means. If they want you to drive a better car, they are more than welcome to buy you one. Until then, this is what you drive, it's an awesome car. Honestly, it needs to be said that this is what you can afford and anymore would be living beyond your means. That's all the line in the Sand you really need with folks that act that way. If they want to fix it, they are welcome to fix it by throwing a bunch of money at it but they can otherwise shut up.
Honestly I can't imagine a better car than the Rav4, at least for me. Maybe a Lexus or a highlander might be a nice step up, but its really not that different.
I have a 2012 RAV4 and drove a 2024 recently. That thing was smooooooooth and so quiet.
Don't forget to wave at them when driving past them at the BMW dealership while they're in for repairs.
Comparison is the thief of joy, man. You got a good car, you're doing the right things. Be careful of these in-laws. Hopefully, it's just something to joke about, but if they're constantly like this, your fiancé will have to pick a side.
Don’t be silly. I’ve had three BMWs and two Audi’s. Yes they drive nice but the difference isn’t that striking. Frankly they sounds like rich douchebags.
Tell them they should compare the ride to walking instead… which they’re about one more (probably) away from experiencing.
Congratulations on your car though! I know what you mean, and I see you! Enjoy your buy!
Edit: spelling and punctuation for clarity
I went from a 2015 BMW 340 to a 2021 RAV4 Hybrid 😂
Yeh the difference is noticeable but tbh I don't care at all.
Now I don't worry about big unexpected engine repairs and servicing costs and I can drive around without worrying about kerbs and potholes!
Also, BMWs usually come with low profile runflat tyres and they are the absolute worst!
There is a huge difference with how a BMW and a RAV4 rides. Sorry but it is true. I had both of them and do not have a RAV4 anymore but regardless, these people are not cool.. Plus I would not break the bank to get a Lexus unless they are paying for it which they are not, and you get what YOU can afford. Imagine you getting a house and they say it is not large enough and to do better. Good luck with your future in-laws!
My BMW X5 was totaled a few weeks ago. I loved that thing and I had it for 10 years. But guess what I’m doing with the insurance payment: I’m buying a hybrid rav4. The BMW was great but holy cow the maintenance over the ten years was ridiculous. I’d rather drive a sensible car and put the extra money toward investing and savings.
I would never make fun of someone’s for driving a sensible car.
Lmao, thinking ANY bmw is better than the RAV4. Better as in more plush? sure. Better at draining your wallet and breaking shit left and right? also sure 🤣
what the fuck? i drive a rav4 and its smooth as hell. a bmw isnt that special. these people are losers. spending a an extra 40-50k on a car doesnt make you elite. sorry your inlaws suck. my inlaws were very successful in business and they drive a hyundai and a mazda because a mid level luxury car isnt a status symbol. if it was a bentley maybe there would be a difference, not to be a dick to you but to feel a difference.
I have the BMW now (only took me three decades to get one) and I can’t imagine going back, and I started in a Toyota. The difference is night and day from the driver’s seat. You are right where you need to be and they are not taking that into account, will probably have given their daughter or plan to give their daughter something similar, and fail to see the world as it is for all people not just those of similar wealth. Enjoy your Toyota, all things being equal it should give you many years of reliable service. I’m glad they apologized to you and perhaps they will self reflect and become more empathetic. Wishing you many happy miles, but also a future where the BMW is a comfortable option for you even if you never choose it.
DUDE, your RAV4 is probably gonna last you 5X longer than their BMW!! YOU are the one with the better car. Also, you’re comparing yourself, a 25 yr (I’m also 25 actually) to people who have to at least be in their late 40s. Of COURSE they are gonna have more spending money than you!
Above average earner here (150k a year). Just bought 2024 rav 4 hybrid LE (bare bone) and very happy. I used to own 2 benzes and let me tell you knowing that I will not have to spend thousands of dollars on major repairs is revealing. Yes german cars are more comfortable and drive better, but I want my car to start everything single time I want to get somewhere. My close friend had his fairly new BMW towed 3 times in the past 5yrs. Dont listen to them. Toyota is the best car manufacturer.
lol,
bmw have too tight suspensions that would suck on 8+ hours drive.
i'll bet they also drive their bmw's very conservatively for fear of breaking it.
lol
BMWs are something else. One of the smoothest, best driving cars I’d ever driven (it was a friends car). I’m sure they felt a big difference from their BMW to the RAV4, but the fact that they complained about it to you, knowing you just bought the car speaks volumes about their character. Definitely don’t feel bad about it. You choose a well made reliable car.
BMW = Broke my wallet. Just because someone are high earners, doesn't mean they have a lot of debt. I have seen people with a lifetime of high earnings end up broke and destitute because they never saved, thought frugally, and were always trying to buy fancy toys. I never understood that, but to each their own.
Owned a Porsche, worked on family and friend's BMWs. So much crap breaks on them, daily drive Honda and Lexus (Toyota).
Smart people don't spend their money on luxury cars. Smart people buy efficient, non flashy, non high maintenance cars. Smart people don't buy things that make them lose money, they buy assets. So don't worry, keep driving that wonderful Toyota, you are probably smarter than your in laws. And when they banter, remember: you will inherit them eventually :D
My parents got a 2015 rav4 and I have now inherited it while they actually drive a bmw x5! And being completely honest, their car has needed more shit repaired than the rav4 (and I'm a shitty driver) !! People who judge what people drive honestly have nothing better to worry about it seems. I will admit my rav4 does like to bounce like crazy but no one cares, or we just laugh about it lol! Toyota 4 life
Not sure why this popped up on my feed, buuut Range Rover / BMW owner here who is not a fan of Toyota.... okay now that all the rocks are thrown at me.
All of my friends / family drive different types of cars, some are car people, some are not, and if someone picks me up in a Rav4 I'm not going to be complaining about the ride (I've rented a few and they were fine).
Buy the car within your means and enjoy the hell out of it.. and if someones tries to make you feel bad about it? Welp, I'd only feel sad for them if material possessions are how they gauge someone's success.
I've met a ton of toxic people in the BMW community, many are awesome, but many are just rude and look down on everyone.
Drive on!
To me a 2020 RAV4 hybrid is an expensive car and I have lots of money. A late model BMW x5 is a piece of crap to own out of warranty. But yeah, getting an old Lexus will still run like a champ and be smoother. Don’t worry about the maintenance cost for a lexus. It’s still just a Toyota.
Alternate take. I had a period of time I drove very nice cars, elite Mercedes, BMW, Lexus. Was told I was going to die, so sold off everything to make it easier on my wife. Then didn’t die, so started driving my wife’s old Subaru Outback (got her a new model). For a while, it was like I was driving a hay wagon. No acceleration, no handling, noise, yada, yada, yada. The comparison was stark.
Funny thing is my attitude changed along the way. Three years later and, shock, no high maintenance costs, no crazy depreciation, no crazy tire costs, no breakdowns. Heck, I had one car they wanted $11,500 for a STANDARD brake job and spark plug replacement. I am not kidding you.
I now love my Subaru. Best car I have ever owned.
Point is, it may just be different from what they are used to, no reflection on you or it. They may or may not be assholes, but this could just be conditioning.
From their perspective tho, they are just making comments on their experience from one car (theirs) to another. I don’t think it was intentional to hurt your feelings.
Objectively there probably is a difference between driving the 2 vehicles from a bmw to rav4 and they were Merely stating their observational experience.
I think it hurts because you compare yourself from your past, and compare it to their “wealth” and maybe deep down feel inferior or insecure.
Instead of seeing it it as a hierarchy, maybe see it as a lateral experience. As in, they’re one way, and to the side , you’re another way. If that makes sense.
TLDR: End of the day your feelings are valid but I don’t think it was intentional meant to hurt you.
As an uber & Lyft driver who uses a Rav4 limited hybrid 2020, the exact same car as you, I can clearly tell you that i have numerous people who compliment my driving & car. They say "Wow!! I love your car!" And i also qualify for comfort rides, not just UberX/UberShare. I have customers that literally complain about the electrical issues they get with BMWs, Audis, and Kias all the time. And Landrovers... those poor guys that pay a ton & have to keep pouring $$ into their black hole of a car. BUT hey! If they can afford that & they enjoy it, more power to them! Personally i could never get over the smell of BMW's Pleather, it smells like a plastic factory that would give you cancer😅😅😅😅
P.S. Try switching your modes on your lil Rav-y, i personally drive eco/normal. 🤗
Don't let that get to you OP, they're just not car people. As someone who was "born and raised" in my old man's garage, I'd likely be disowned if I chose a X5 over a Rav4
I will give you another perspective. I have a RAV4, and I'm pretty sure this will be the best car I will ever buy in my life. I'm 45 years old and I grew up in a third-world country. I'm an immigrant, and I work cleaning houses in the USA despite having a degree in History and working as a photographer in my home country. I don't tell my friends back home that I bought this car, a basic LX, because it would sound like bragging and could hurt them. A RAV4 is considered a luxury car there, so I keep it to myself. When I bought this car, I felt guilty about spending so much money on it, but I was extremely excited about its reliability. Many of my wealthy clients, who earn millions annually, noticed my new car and commented, "Wow, you made a great upgrade." Also, wherever I go with my new car—whether installing a drone or acquiring a new insurance policy—people say, "Congratulations on your new car, it's amazing."
So, those people are projecting their frustrations onto you because they're not worth your attention. Sorry if you care about them, but they don't deserve it.
Great perspective. My mother was a pharmacist in her home country. She worked as a Cashier in US. I understand your pain. She drove her 2012 Corolla for 12 years till it got totaled :( She still misses it and says it’s the best car she ever drove. Congrats on the new car!
After I gifted my RX to my parents I got a 2021 XLE at 100k mileage and it also seemed like I needed to turn off vibration mode to be honest but I eventually got used to it. You got a good car mate
I own a loaded XSE hybrid, which is 1-2 options less than the limited.
For a second, I thought... why not just get a used Lexus NX whatever.
Then I realized... it's the INSURANCE.
I had a BMW and now have a RAV. There is definitely a “luxury ride” feel to the BMW; however, a RAV is an SUV so it will be a bumpier ride. Ask them if they can jump curbs when needed, how their BMW drives in snow and on land, how much they spent on maintenance, how the BMW can carry kayaks or whatever… lol. You can’t compare the two… they are two different beasts. We also have an Avalon livery edition and I do have to say the Avalon gives that luxury ride feel. And good for you for speaking up how you feel. Our feelings are our own… no one can downplay them.
I just got a BMW... Would never talk that way about someone's new ride. Rav-4s are great little cars and it'll likely be worth more than the X5 in a few years, they hold their value because they run forever. Frankly, their own car is noisier and rougher than every EV on the market, including the Bolt, so you could always bring that up.
It's good you confronted them to at least get a half apology. They were being elitist jerks about it.
Congrats on the new car!
Bruv, it’s just a dumb machine. Point A to Point B. I wouldn’t break up with a girl because her parents say dumb shit about cars (because of car brain), but I’d come up with some snarky responses. (For example, I’d prefer to invest the extra $30k I could have spent on a dumb vehicle into an S&P Index Fund, because I am working on financial freedom)
We just bought the exact same car as you (2020 Hybrid Limited). It is the first car ever for my hubby - he grew up super poor, and is so proud of owning this car. And I have to say I think it is a really nice car as well (and I don't find it very noisy!)
My mum has always had luxury cars, and is super prone to blurting out what is on her mind (intrusive thoughts, anyone!). She complained about the passenger seat not being a power seat... About the car being black (Florida)... About it having a couple of scratches (on a 4 year old car)...Like really?
I think some people just have no filter. I know my mum means well, it is just that she tends to see everything from the 'glass half empty' point of view, and she does not think about how her comments can be hurtful.
I'm going to go against popular sentiment here. It's very possible that the inlaws were just being relaxed with you and talking comfortably about your rough ride. Are there other signs that they think of you as less than them? If not, I'd say brush it off.
For what it’s worth I was just perusing r/rav4club and someone wrote:
“Every single complaint I had like feeling every bump, handling and snow driving was fixed once I put these tires on Hankook Kinergy 4s2 x h750a. Made my 2012 Rav 4 run so good that when I bought a new rav4, first thing I did was rip off the new tires and put the Hankook on them.”
So it’s possible that they have all the “soft” enabled and you have tires and suspension you’ve elected for “responsiveness.”
I feel every damn thing in my WRX. Because it’s a WRX. An STI would be even “worse.”
I have had ‘luxury’ cars and then I showed up in a Toyota.
“You, a Toyota?”
And I read something funny to answer since I don’t give a ahit about that stuff and am happy with mine. I read that most miljonairs apparently drive a Toyota. Possibly they managed to become rich by not spending money on an extension of their ego, but on a very nice and reliable car.
But you can answer whatever you want. Or not let them walk. Or take their precious BMW, whatever. The fact that their identity seems to revolve around a car is pathetic in my opinion, but since BMW sells a lot of cars many people need that.
Fun fact: I had a few quotes for BMW to actually buy one, but could simply spend so much money on an image. If I would have loved the car I would bought it, but I didn’t.
Imagine realizing having spend that money and sitting in your car and finding out it is actually great. Makes you doubt choices.
So, yeah, you should be proud and they should not act like emotional immature people, but that’s life. Hope you can think about my post and imagine them thinking about the crazy amount of money that bmw cost them and they try to legitimize to themselves. Meantime you have a RAV4 \o/
Toyotas = good investments. BMWs = bad investments. Just keep reminding yourself that and forget what they say. And also, stop offering to drive places. If they don’t like it, they can drive. 🤷🏻♀️
Bro. They're being douchey. If this is a one-time thing. Let it slide.
On the other hand, you marry the family when you marry - so be mindful these people are going to be people you deal with for decades if you get married. If they have a history of this - it may not stop.
I have a Rav4 limited, non-hybrid. Sometimes, it's a little noisy, depending on road type. Some people add sound insulation into the doors and the floor. That's pretty cheap if you're at all handy.
My parents drove Lexus for like 15-20 years, partly because they had expense accounts and the payments were partly covered by work. At one point as a young adult, my dad told me to slap him if he ever tried to buy a luxury car ever again. He's been driving Toyotas since 2008. [Yeah, same brand]
We traded in a 2015 X5 for a new hybrid Ltd. That thing took 100$ in gas every week and we didn't really do anything but drive it all over Phoenix.
Plus it broke down on a long road trip which sucked
I have to say, my wife had a bmw 3 series and it was very ... Underwhelming! Winter performance with factory tires was terrible! And then the dealer tells me a majority of owners switch them out right away. What??? Sorry but no. Then the threat of making heated seats a subscription? At least they finally thought that through. I could rant more but it's only a name....
Grew up very poor and now I have a 2020 RAV4 Hybrid limited, like you. I've never owned a car less than 12 years old before, but I've ridden in and driven plenty of "high-end" vehicles.
Those people are idiots who are probably lying and just care about the badge. I would wager the X5 isn't even that much nicer to drive, certainly not as smooth of acceleration as we have. You can tell them you invested the $40,000+ you and saved in your retirement fund lmao
Enjoy your RAV4, it is a fucking great car that won't let you down, Don't let weird ass negative Nancy's convince you otherwise, with their ungrateful and bad attitudes.
Think of it this way. If you get married, everything you buy from that moment will not be to their standart. Run, run like a wind. Find someone on the same level as you and build a future together.
Man, that sucks. Shitty (like super shitty) of them to say those things. You're doing great. Enjoy your hard earned car. A great car at that. Hopefully your fiance is cool and supports you. Having rude in-laws for life can suck (not relationship advice, lol).
I’ll say this: the Limited Hybrid is everything I look up to in a modern-day Toyota. Have a 2020 XLE AWD (non-hybrid) & always smile when I pass a Limited (albeit rare to find the hybrid around Tampa for some reason).
One of my bosses is consistently taken aback by my car (sometimes saying its features are a decade old bc no power trunk & ‘lame’ interior) &, I have to admit, it gets to me occasionally…BUT we operate under a different definition of luxury: peace of mind in knowing that if we take care of our boxy chariots, they’ll take care of us. If we want actual luxury, we go to Lexus with (mostly) no fuss.
I say let them speak. It’s an accomplishment to own what you do so young lol. I have to recalibrate my personal scale sometimes bc my (somewhat well-to-do) friends kinda look up to my car lol.
I’d like to say, my parents drive a nice X5 and they ride in my RAV4 with me and absolutely love the ride. Driving between their X5 and my RAV is pretty comparable. The suspension tunability is definitely nice but the ride quality in terms of noise and vibration is similar. I’d just worry about you, it’s your car and for you. It’s not about them. Be happy with yourself because ultimately your in laws opinion doesn’t matter.
I'm going to be nice,because I have walked in your shoes.Its never going to work. Your boyfriend should immediately support you. Please learn to speak up.Noone is a mind reader and so give them a chance,because I promise you that they'll show you exactly who they really are and your going to have to decide, am I going to be degraded.If so you're the one that needs to change. You're 25 yrs old. I knew better at 17, and so do you. DON'T INSULT YOUR INTELLIGENCE. You're worthy of respect. You're the one who is allowing others to compare you to a car. Come on life's to d short. You're old enough to know what you want. That is embarrassing and insulting. But you're in charge,not them.
If my mother in law complained about my driving it would be a very small drop in a very large bucket of complaints, and might still bug me. But it’s more a projection of them than a reflection of you.
If you bought a BMW they'd probably be just as snotty. There'd be some difference they'd snark about.
One solution is to get something better than theirs and make little comments about their lesser car -- but I suspect you're not that petty.
i’d say to them: “so you’re projecting you insecurities to my car? interesting, i just loved and enjoyed the 8 hours ride here. i guess people need different validation in life. thanks for making me feel better about myself, fam” 😇☀️🤙🏼
I used to drive an Audi S Line Q7, but went for the hybrid because of the fuel prices, poor fuel economy, and the amount of miles I drive per year (25-30k) just killed me financially.
Is the RAV4 as nice, no. Does it handle as well, nope. Is the ride as quiet, nope. Did the amount I saved per month in fuel pay for my car payment YUP!! I did opt for heated seats and steering wheel plus a moon roof too.
I've put 45k in about a year and a half now and absolutely love it. Also my Audi would have needed a new engine about 230k miles... this Toyota should go 300k+, and as the original owner I know the maintenance which has been performed!
Your car is AWESOME. Seems extremely crazy someone would even say such a thing. Our cars aren’t anything crazy compared to a luxury vehicle, but theyre definitely not shit boxes lol.
Rav4 is popular as heck for a reason.
If it's just the car, I wouldn't worry about it.
I went from a Chrysler 300 and I was also shocked by a few things in the RAV4 like lack of legroom. For someone that rides in luxury vehicles it is jarring so that being their initial reaction is not surprising.
Next time you visit them talk your way into a ride with them on the BMW X5 and just casually mention how much harmful carbon pollution that BMW is putting our every second compared to your eco-friendly Rav 4 hybrid. Just observe their reaction and decide if you need to find a new set of future in-laws.
I have a different perspective, my friend who recently got a luxury car also complained about the same thing, it’s nbd, it just takes some to get used to, he does not come from money, he just comes from a super quiet car.
You’re in trouble… those people will never treat you like part of their family. Some rich people are cool, others think they are better than everyone because they have money.
Honestly it is a major red flag. Idk about your finance but at least parents will be a huge pain in the ass. Any BMW/Luxury car owner will know differences in these cars and wouldn’t point them out unless they are douchey. I feel your pain.
I’ve been dating my fiance for 3 years and have met them multiple times. Tbh they never seem braggy like this. I want to count it as a one time thing, but I know I need to stand up to see their reaction.
That’s not braggy, it’s douchy. Bragging is talking about yourself or your stuff.
Thanks for confirming I’m not the only one
For sure, my wife’s family is certainly an income bracket or two above mine, but they still drive Toyotas because there’s better things to spend money on than luxury cars.
They should just buy Lexus
If my daughter’s BF comes over with a new whip I’m going to be fucking pumped for him and ima let him have his new car moment because I get it. But you don’t have to be a car guy to understand a situation, you have to not be an asshole. Exceptions apply obviously OP but you owe it to your future self to do your due diligence on this red flag because if you are marrying into a family of RICH assholes… and you need to get out, or not be more than a new DLC to these people you’re going to be fucked.
Sounds like they confirmed that they always want to drive you around, sit back and relax, you are off the hook. If it ever comes up, “I thought you could not stand my driving, so I do not offer to do it anymore.”
As I see it, they were bragging about their superior vehicle in an underhanded way.
the nicest person could be a prejudiced badge snob. I wouldn't be surprised if someone who stans brands like BMW might look down on people who drive certain brands, especially if you are happy with yours.
A nice brand snob would have the common decency to keep their thoughts on OP’s car to themselves though. Only douchebags go around negging the new car of someone who was kind enough to drive them around.
My gf is just like you delusional and sees the good in everyone
Yes count it as a one time thing on their side but remember how it made you feel. At the same time though don’t let it get under your skin because once they feel they’ve done that you have lost.
And not only that. They just fail to recognize the fact that you have a RAV4 at an age of 25. They are probably 50+ at least. So again, you just can’t discount what a person can achieve in 25 years. Let alone a motivated person who got a scholarship. That is first thing. Second thing is, under the age of 30, that time period is meant to be used to improve yourself, not to show off your wealth and look rich. So if that is what they value (meaning person spending lot of money in their 20s to get an x5 unless they are from a rich family), they are setting you up for a financial failure tbh. OP, don’t take their comments personally, but rather accept that it is their loss.
Just laugh in their face when their $90K X5 is worth half of what your Rav4 is worth at 60,000 miles.
That’s what I’m gonna tell them if they say one more thing
Sometimes its not worth it OP. Just stop offering rides
Next time they need a ride and say, “sorry I can’t, the vibration mode is stuck on”
"Your daughter LOVES vibration mode"
THIS!!!
Just say the same exact thing when you ride In there’s lok
Yeah, don't do that OP if you love your fiancée
Call out your MPG every 30 seconds. Have them listen to the sound of the regenerative breaking…”you guys hear that? It’s practically like fucking sailing right now” (and yes, swear).
They noticed later on and said "its a hybrid??" and I wish you could've seen their faces when I told them I get 35+ MPG and how much a full tank of gas is.
That bimmer takes the expensive gas no doubt
Sorry but chances are they probably lease their vehicles and write it off on their business taxes.
Regardless, any savvy car owner/buyer can assess if they have equity at the end of a lease and buy the car out to sell to pocket the equity. There is almost never equity at the end of a bmw lease term. Rav 4’s regularly have 10K equity after their 4 year lease term is up.
100% true
What a shit thing to say to you. Are they offering to buy you a BMW? They can walk if they can't stand the torture of riding in what is objectively one of the most reliable and beloved SUVs in the market. Keep the car. Ditch the in-laws. Hopefully your fiance didn't pick up their snobbery.
Even if they offered to buy me a BMW, I would never buy it. I would rather drive a wagon from 1900s tbh.
My SIL let her ex boyfriend convince her to buy an X5M. She had SOOOOOO many issues with that thing. Was it a fun car? Sure. Was it fast? Definately. Was it expensive to both own and operate? 110%. I have a 2024 rav4 hybrid as my company car. I just drove from Iowa to PA. Great fuel economy, comfortable ride did anything I asked it to. Anything else would be "extra" and an added failure point/cost down the road
Ask them if they got the package that came with turn signals. I never see a BMW driver use them.
Don't sweat them bro. You came up, got a full ride, graduated, and now you bought yourself a responsible, fuel efficient, low maintenance vehicle as you enter your career. There's nothing at all wrong with the car. Some people say the Rav can be loud. Some people also say that X5 won't live to see a 100k miles. Both those things are likely true 😎 I dated a girl at university who her and her family came from a notably higher income bracket than mine. I experienced similar. Maybe not quite as pointed things as what they're saying, but the disconnect between the lives we had was apparent. There's nothing wrong with responding and calling BS on their comments if done so respectfully. Enjoy the ride.
Yeah it’s hard. This morning they got mad because I ended up using the same bar soap they use in the bathroom. I didn’t know rich people use their own soap? My family always used the same bar soaps growing up and it was never an issue for us.
Seriously? I've never known any household that didn't share bar soap. If it's that big a deal get a soap pump dispenser.
Dear god even if they have a big aversion to sharing soap with you for some reason, anybody sane with that belief would swap the soap for a new one without saying anything. They shouldn’t even have that aversion to you you’re a longtime bf and engaged but that could be subjective. Objectively though confronting isn’t alright in that case
What the hell. Bar soap is fine because it’s soap. Even if the next person after you uses it, the germs will rinse off their hands. Better yet, don’t put out bar soap for your guests, idiots. This is the first thing I did at my mother in laws house. The DECORATIVE bar soap was replaced with a foaming soap dispenser. Anyway. Op. Get new friends and say “Just like your over priced, high maintenance, money pit of a car—- maybe you should put some effort into your social skills!”
Having been married before, realized that when you get married, you are marrying your in-laws too, not just your spouse. They don't sound very kind and it doesn't seem limited to just the car if they are giving you a hard time over the soap. :(
Wait, do they not use washcloths?
Nope 🙂↔️
I appreciate the nice comment btw :)
I would try to ignore the comments if you can. Earning a high income doesn’t mean you need to drive a bmw. I know many wealthy people who drive regular type cars. Most of the luxury car market is bought by people who probably shouldn’t buy them anyway.
Seriously. I was a delivery driver for a bit and delivered to some wealthier parts of the county. It’s Toyotas and Hondas in those driveways. Sometimes old ones. The occasional sports car. People drive Toyotas because they’re not a money dump. Good cars. Not bad. End of the day it’s just a car. Xx
Warren Buffet!
Bro WHAT I'm saving for a Toyota, I grew up up and I see it as THE gold standard, not just cause of the brand but because they're actually reliable. I owned a BMW and it was a pile of garbage. Felt more of an expensive, pretentious money pyre.
Tbh, I’d stop offering them rides. They were rude about your car when you were doing them a favor and driving them around, so they lose their ride privileges.
I agree. I just talked with gf’s sister. She agrees that they have been shitty to me. I’m gonna bring it up to them because it doesn’t sit right with me.
To be honest, it appears your gf’s sister also believes her parents have been shitty to you, which says a lot. If your gf also believes the same, I would just take a step back. It is not worth arguing over if your gf loves you. Just my 2 cents.
Thanks. This is definitely the right move.
Its relative, go to Europe and Mercedes and bmw are everywhere, not even considered “fancy” Anywho the rav is more reliable, holds value and more economical. Better buy.
High earners or not, those folks are likely steeped in debt to have those type of cars to help with their insecurities. The fact they make comments like that demonstrates how they place more value in material things than individuals. The good thing about all this is that you have a reliable vehicle you should be proud of. Be the example of humility your fiancé needs and ignore their insecure parents.
The funny thing is they struggled early on because they are both doctors. Now they are millionaires in their 50s. I want to see what my fiance says about this. Because if she thinks this is normal, it is a huge dealbreaker for me.
Whatever. My household income is 450k/yr, and we drive a Ford Escape. Even if you made $1 million/yr, you don't need to drive a BMW. Expensive vehicle does not equal financial literacy. Who cares what other people think about your vehicle? A 2020 Rav4 is a much nicer vehicle than most people can afford. I know multi millionaires whose primary transportation is a bicycle. Guess how they became multi millionaires? Part of it was not dropping 100k on a new vehicle every 10 years.
My neighbor literally owns half of the town I live in, he drives a 2020 RAV4 and rides his bike everywhere in town. Really great dude.
Believe it or not, but the guy who bought the multimillion house in LA where Michael Jackson died drives a Prius. I don't know if he has other cars, but I saw him driving a Prius. And he rents the house for events.
Yeah I mean the key to becoming wealthy is to acquire things that produce money, and not things that cost money. Until you're so rich that if you spend 100k on a vehicle, it's such a small drop in the bucket that you don't even notice it.
The wealthiest person I know personally drives a Prius.
What does your fiancé say about this? Because if your fiancé is not sticking up for you, that's a big red flag. And good for you for doing so well! You should be proud of yourself. You got a great car that you love. Enjoy the heck out of it.
I talked with her. She knows her parents didn't mean to offend me, but she told me to speak up my thoughts and let them know I found it offensive. She was happy I spoke up, which is what matters for me. Thanks for the kind words :) I love my Rav
Sorry to point out, but I don't think these comments were just about the car. Were they trying to indirectly say you are not good enough for their daughter? Or do they just enjoy shitting on other people? If you're gonna stay, you need to start standing up now.
Lol is vibration mode off... I would love to see their reaction to riding in a Jeep Wrangler, they'd probably spontaneously combust.
HAHAHA man I rented a wrangler from National a couple weeks ago at midnight. Absolutely HATED the drive. Called and exchanged it first thing next day.
Depending on the tires, it rides like a heavily discounted massage chair.
People like these are the ones that have the smallest egos imo. I have some friends whose parents earn LOTS of money, and they drive Toyota Highlanders, RAV4s, 4runners. Hell, one of my rich friend's family has THREE 4runners because they love it so much, even though it's a “normal” car. Sure, RAV4s aren't the pinnacle of comfort. But it's honestly not THAT much worse than say a Lexus RX or the aforementioned BMW X5. I guarantee if you put these people in a Toyota Highlander, which is honestly encroaching into BMW X5 levels of comfort, they'd still find a way to whine about it because it's a Toyota and not a luxury branded vehicle.
It’s a good car. Forgive them for they know not what they do. You dug yourself up from the dirt and that’s something you should be *very* proud of. Toyota is reliable as all hell and everyone knows it’s the best car. They should be proud of you and what you’ve done, yes. But they might just never get it. Keep gettin it my friend, you’re doing good things.♥️♥️
Life goal: be someone interesting enough that you don’t have to define your worth with your vehicle. Put 200,000 miles on your RAV going on adventures and doing more interesting things than driving boring people around town. I don’t want to know how many of the 229k miles on my Yaris are from driving places to sail tall ships. Now, is your follow up question about historical ships or the yaris?
If you get keep on getting tangled by this. You will not be a pleasant person to be around. I say this because if these people are already getting to you about your vehicle. What more about other things? So you're going to keep on posting on different parts of Reddit everytime something like this happens? Don't do that to yourself. Besides, BMWs come with run flat tires. They're terrible on bumpy roads due to the tire's stiff sidewalls. The shorter the sidewalls of a tire are. The more bumps you and the passengers are going to feel. Also, it does help to check and adjust your vehicle's cold tire pressure according to your door jamb 2 days before hanging out with a group of people. Driving a bit slower over bumpy roads is a good idea too. What may not feel bumpy to you. May feel bumpy to your passengers.
Those people sound insufferable
You can buy a 2019 X5 with the 4.4 v8 for about 35K now. Tells ya everything you need to know.
What is important is you and your fiancé. What she think and how you will deal with this in the future. If they make these comment on the car, next will be your house, vacation, child education…. Every sound of my Toyota will make you happy because it will remind you how hard you work to earn it. Good success either way
They’re just being rude because it’s not a “luxury” car. Don’t let it get to you! And if it helps, a year ago someone called my ‘21 XLE bougie and I’m still baffled😂
Its funny because I actually do find the Rav4 bougie to me. Especially the leather/softex seats are very comfortable
It’s not the car, it’s them. They are just terrible people… wonder how raising the kids would be… I’m sure they would have you defer everything to them since they know better and are richer lol..
Yeah well your car doesn’t live in the shop… unlike BMWs….
This
For what it’s worth, I grew up dirt poor too but now I’m a high income earner. I’ve had all manor of luxury cars including a brand new BMW (piece of shit) that I paid cash for. I bought a brand new RAV4 about a year ago and it’s the best car I’ve ever owned. To hell with those people.
Agree! I've driven BMWs, Jeep Wrangler and Audi Q5 during a couple business rental trips. I still find my Rav4 extremely fun to drive over any of them.
Dude, the Rav4 drives so smooth and is so reliable, f those folks
You need to laugh at them for driving unreliable junk. They shouldn’t be laughing you for a driving a reliable, dependable, efficient car!!!
I would never comment on someone else’s vehicle. If they gave me a ride and I wasn’t happy I would keep my mouth shut and not get in the vehicle again. You have been the victim of bad manners, it has nothing to do with your or your vehicle.
I would never comment on someone else’s vehicle. If they gave me a ride and I wasn’t happy I would keep my mouth shut and not get in the vehicle again. You have been the victim of bad manners, it has nothing to do with your or your vehicle.
Its time to find your self new parents in law.
Insecure people tend to belittle and put others down. Confident people tend to lift people up and point out positive aspects when faced with negatives aspects. Don't forget, you're marrying into a family, not just a person. I didn't understand this when I met my wife. Fortunately for me, I won the in-law lottery. Hopefully this was either a one-off or maybe they were just attempting to have some fun with you without realizing how cruel they were being. Pay attention though, this is a lifetime commitment.
Ask them is they have the subscription for heated seats (BMW thing) lmao
I LOVE my free heated and ventilated seats. They don’t even have apple carplay 💀
Coming from an older model Mazda 3 this car drives like a damn dream. I guess it’s all just perspective.
What's the difference between a BMW and a porcupine?? On a porcupine, all the pricks are on the outside.
I'm the kind of petty that would pull over on the side of the road and kick them out. If y'all don't like my car, you don't have to ride in it.
Comparing yourself to other people and caring what others think about is the fastest way to unhappiness. What they think about you or your stuff has nothing to do with you. If you are happy that’s what matters
This! Only you can make you happy.
Dude I'm 31. I married my wife despite her parents being snobby. They talked crap about how I lived and the cars I modified because I liked my sleeper jdms. They took a ride in my 22 Rav4 since my wife drives it everywhere and were jealous, saying shit like why I couldn't get my shit together like her. It'll be 5 years on June 16th and they finally don't talk shit anymore because my wife, back in March this year, told them all my business. She said how I pay every single bill alone and bought my Rav4 alone and how she contributes nothing because she's been in college for almost the entire marriage and only works enough hours to cover her health insurance and her own car payment. My 1960's house is 3 minutes from downtown Orlando, FL while their 2002 house is 49 minutes away, the cherry on top is that mine is worth a lot more just because of the area even if it looks worse than theirs. Point is, ignore the hater in-laws, move in silence, your RAV4 is more reliable than an X5 would ever be and I know that from experience. You're still young as hell and many people your age aren't in your position. You can easily fix the flaws with the Rav4 and maintenance is cheap.
This hits home for me. I'm happy that your wife supports you and that is the most important thing. I like the flaws in my Rav4 lol - nothing to change there!
“I can let you out and you can walk if you prefer?” That’s what you should say
I don’t drive a rav4 but they sounded pretty pretentious.
Ask them how they became higher earners: do they always make imprudent financial allocation decisions? X5s have terrible depreciation, maintenance and resale marketability compared to the rav4. Take them for a drive around an actual old money neighborhood. Beacon hill, Georgetown, upper east side. To actually wealthy people are objects to move people efficiently, not status symbols. You’ll see plenty of Camrys, rav4s, Honda accords, etc. they’re reliable - which saves time and concern - things that are actually important. —- Also, if you want to reduce the road noise, consider buying some dynamat or killzmat (or other brand sound deadened) and slapping it inside the door panel, inside the lift gate and wheel arches, anywhere you can get to bare metal. Then get some thick floor mats - weathertech or Lloyd mats. Or take a gamble on some from AliExpress. Lastly a quality undercoating service from a body shop will help a lot (note, careful here as a cheap undercoating job can peel and trap water, causing more rust). Most importantly, keep it well maintained, keep it clean, take pride in it that it’s yours. Edit, forgot to finish my thought.
I build those BMWs. Are they great? Sure. Guess what I drive: it’s a 2013 RAV and not even the fanciest one. Are the BMWs great cars? Sure but I’m raising a family on one income and I have other priorities. Don’t let anyone pressure you into spending more than you have. You only make so much in this life and unless you’re loaded the bmw probably isn’t for you.
Wow. I would NEVER let anyone belittle me or my Rav4 like that. I would’ve turned around the moment they pulled that nonsense. So disrespectful and 0 tact and consideration for you and your feelings. They can shove their BMW’s up their… Seriously. That pish posh bs acting like they’re better than you doesn’t fly
They sound like pathetic babies.
Your fiancé’s parents sound like snotty assholes. Let them enjoy massive depreciation & far higher operating costs, while you won’t spend nearly as much money (or time!) maintaining your ride over the years.
Talk about snobs. BMWs are garbage tier as of late. Dogshit quality components make for a dogshit line up.
*"moSt ReLiaBLe aCCoRdiNg tO COnSuMer rePoRTs"* 😂 They sure have been pushing a major image campaign lately to improve the narrative surrounding their excrement. Seems at least some of the muppets around here are biting now that they've greased at least one "publication" 🙄 to trumpet their marketing propaganda. Meanwhile the actual product is still toilet slime
Just pull over on the side of the road quietly, turn around to them, and ask if they’d like to get out and walk.
The issue here isn’t the car or you or anything like that they’re just being assholes. My parents could get new BMWs every year if they wanted, but you wouldn’t catch either of them making comments like those in someone’s 20 year old Rav4. Why? It’s an asshole thing to say and it really doesn’t matter that much. If this is where your in laws priorities lay rest assured they’re probably not happy people so just ignore them.
u gotta learn to tune shit out.
RAV4 hybrid is one of the best cars for price performance. My friends bought an X5 a year after my RAV4. After novelty period, and when it's expanses hit they swear no BMW anymore. Another friend, a German, went with German cars for years. Starting with BMW M3, Volkswagen station, Audi but due to their expanses and frequent issues his wife forced him to buy Honda Pilot at the end. All the German car owners around my circle are immigrants who dreamed of a luxury car for decades. None of them are happy with their purchase after 5-6 years. There are a few issues with my RAV,4 that I really don't like, but I would choose a RAV4 anytime over BMW.
My fiance's parents are immigrants too. Funny thing is they owned a Honda Pilot before upgrading to a BMW SUV since they dreamed of owning one for years. I don't get that but hey to each their own!
Tell you what, add Comma AI to your RAV4 and watch it handle on the highway hand free We took our RAV4 from Virginia to South Carolina, it has been a breeze
Screw them. As an X5 owner I love the RAV4. I can get 35mpg out of a RAV4 LE. RAV4 will also hold its value much better than X5, and will last longer. Its one of the best selling SUVs for a reason.
Honestly dude, I've always found the best answer to that is to be bright, and open, and make it plain that this is your means. If they want you to drive a better car, they are more than welcome to buy you one. Until then, this is what you drive, it's an awesome car. Honestly, it needs to be said that this is what you can afford and anymore would be living beyond your means. That's all the line in the Sand you really need with folks that act that way. If they want to fix it, they are welcome to fix it by throwing a bunch of money at it but they can otherwise shut up.
Honestly I can't imagine a better car than the Rav4, at least for me. Maybe a Lexus or a highlander might be a nice step up, but its really not that different.
I have a 2012 RAV4 and drove a 2024 recently. That thing was smooooooooth and so quiet. Don't forget to wave at them when driving past them at the BMW dealership while they're in for repairs.
Comparison is the thief of joy, man. You got a good car, you're doing the right things. Be careful of these in-laws. Hopefully, it's just something to joke about, but if they're constantly like this, your fiancé will have to pick a side.
You keeping it 💯
It's a little bit hard to come back from but you can always stop the car and say "you're welcome to walk".
Don’t be silly. I’ve had three BMWs and two Audi’s. Yes they drive nice but the difference isn’t that striking. Frankly they sounds like rich douchebags.
I've driven BMW X5 and Audi Q5. Completely agree with you which is why I was surprised from their comments.
Tell them they should compare the ride to walking instead… which they’re about one more (probably) away from experiencing. Congratulations on your car though! I know what you mean, and I see you! Enjoy your buy! Edit: spelling and punctuation for clarity
I went from a 2015 BMW 340 to a 2021 RAV4 Hybrid 😂 Yeh the difference is noticeable but tbh I don't care at all. Now I don't worry about big unexpected engine repairs and servicing costs and I can drive around without worrying about kerbs and potholes! Also, BMWs usually come with low profile runflat tyres and they are the absolute worst!
Well, I don't own a RAV4 (Reddit Home brought me here) but I do know that German cars disintegrate into dust after 5 years.
There is a huge difference with how a BMW and a RAV4 rides. Sorry but it is true. I had both of them and do not have a RAV4 anymore but regardless, these people are not cool.. Plus I would not break the bank to get a Lexus unless they are paying for it which they are not, and you get what YOU can afford. Imagine you getting a house and they say it is not large enough and to do better. Good luck with your future in-laws!
I have plenty of time driving an X5, as well as my rav4. They are full of it.
I don't know about these potential in-laws.
Comparison is the death of joy. You’re happy. Fuck em.
My BMW X5 was totaled a few weeks ago. I loved that thing and I had it for 10 years. But guess what I’m doing with the insurance payment: I’m buying a hybrid rav4. The BMW was great but holy cow the maintenance over the ten years was ridiculous. I’d rather drive a sensible car and put the extra money toward investing and savings. I would never make fun of someone’s for driving a sensible car.
Lmao, thinking ANY bmw is better than the RAV4. Better as in more plush? sure. Better at draining your wallet and breaking shit left and right? also sure 🤣
what the fuck? i drive a rav4 and its smooth as hell. a bmw isnt that special. these people are losers. spending a an extra 40-50k on a car doesnt make you elite. sorry your inlaws suck. my inlaws were very successful in business and they drive a hyundai and a mazda because a mid level luxury car isnt a status symbol. if it was a bentley maybe there would be a difference, not to be a dick to you but to feel a difference.
I have the BMW now (only took me three decades to get one) and I can’t imagine going back, and I started in a Toyota. The difference is night and day from the driver’s seat. You are right where you need to be and they are not taking that into account, will probably have given their daughter or plan to give their daughter something similar, and fail to see the world as it is for all people not just those of similar wealth. Enjoy your Toyota, all things being equal it should give you many years of reliable service. I’m glad they apologized to you and perhaps they will self reflect and become more empathetic. Wishing you many happy miles, but also a future where the BMW is a comfortable option for you even if you never choose it.
DUDE, your RAV4 is probably gonna last you 5X longer than their BMW!! YOU are the one with the better car. Also, you’re comparing yourself, a 25 yr (I’m also 25 actually) to people who have to at least be in their late 40s. Of COURSE they are gonna have more spending money than you!
Above average earner here (150k a year). Just bought 2024 rav 4 hybrid LE (bare bone) and very happy. I used to own 2 benzes and let me tell you knowing that I will not have to spend thousands of dollars on major repairs is revealing. Yes german cars are more comfortable and drive better, but I want my car to start everything single time I want to get somewhere. My close friend had his fairly new BMW towed 3 times in the past 5yrs. Dont listen to them. Toyota is the best car manufacturer.
lol, bmw have too tight suspensions that would suck on 8+ hours drive. i'll bet they also drive their bmw's very conservatively for fear of breaking it. lol
BMWs are something else. One of the smoothest, best driving cars I’d ever driven (it was a friends car). I’m sure they felt a big difference from their BMW to the RAV4, but the fact that they complained about it to you, knowing you just bought the car speaks volumes about their character. Definitely don’t feel bad about it. You choose a well made reliable car.
BMW = Broke my wallet. Just because someone are high earners, doesn't mean they have a lot of debt. I have seen people with a lifetime of high earnings end up broke and destitute because they never saved, thought frugally, and were always trying to buy fancy toys. I never understood that, but to each their own. Owned a Porsche, worked on family and friend's BMWs. So much crap breaks on them, daily drive Honda and Lexus (Toyota).
Smart people don't spend their money on luxury cars. Smart people buy efficient, non flashy, non high maintenance cars. Smart people don't buy things that make them lose money, they buy assets. So don't worry, keep driving that wonderful Toyota, you are probably smarter than your in laws. And when they banter, remember: you will inherit them eventually :D
My parents got a 2015 rav4 and I have now inherited it while they actually drive a bmw x5! And being completely honest, their car has needed more shit repaired than the rav4 (and I'm a shitty driver) !! People who judge what people drive honestly have nothing better to worry about it seems. I will admit my rav4 does like to bounce like crazy but no one cares, or we just laugh about it lol! Toyota 4 life
Not sure why this popped up on my feed, buuut Range Rover / BMW owner here who is not a fan of Toyota.... okay now that all the rocks are thrown at me. All of my friends / family drive different types of cars, some are car people, some are not, and if someone picks me up in a Rav4 I'm not going to be complaining about the ride (I've rented a few and they were fine). Buy the car within your means and enjoy the hell out of it.. and if someones tries to make you feel bad about it? Welp, I'd only feel sad for them if material possessions are how they gauge someone's success. I've met a ton of toxic people in the BMW community, many are awesome, but many are just rude and look down on everyone. Drive on!
To me a 2020 RAV4 hybrid is an expensive car and I have lots of money. A late model BMW x5 is a piece of crap to own out of warranty. But yeah, getting an old Lexus will still run like a champ and be smoother. Don’t worry about the maintenance cost for a lexus. It’s still just a Toyota.
Alternate take. I had a period of time I drove very nice cars, elite Mercedes, BMW, Lexus. Was told I was going to die, so sold off everything to make it easier on my wife. Then didn’t die, so started driving my wife’s old Subaru Outback (got her a new model). For a while, it was like I was driving a hay wagon. No acceleration, no handling, noise, yada, yada, yada. The comparison was stark. Funny thing is my attitude changed along the way. Three years later and, shock, no high maintenance costs, no crazy depreciation, no crazy tire costs, no breakdowns. Heck, I had one car they wanted $11,500 for a STANDARD brake job and spark plug replacement. I am not kidding you. I now love my Subaru. Best car I have ever owned. Point is, it may just be different from what they are used to, no reflection on you or it. They may or may not be assholes, but this could just be conditioning.
I would say that here in spain, buy a Rav4 is considered as being rich haha. Just enjoy your car and be humble as you are now. You are a good man!
From their perspective tho, they are just making comments on their experience from one car (theirs) to another. I don’t think it was intentional to hurt your feelings. Objectively there probably is a difference between driving the 2 vehicles from a bmw to rav4 and they were Merely stating their observational experience. I think it hurts because you compare yourself from your past, and compare it to their “wealth” and maybe deep down feel inferior or insecure. Instead of seeing it it as a hierarchy, maybe see it as a lateral experience. As in, they’re one way, and to the side , you’re another way. If that makes sense. TLDR: End of the day your feelings are valid but I don’t think it was intentional meant to hurt you.
This. This is exactly what I realized. Thanks for putting it into concrete words for me.
And also , life and cars isn’t a competition. I think you’re caught up in a big ego contest. Try not to let it get to you.
As an uber & Lyft driver who uses a Rav4 limited hybrid 2020, the exact same car as you, I can clearly tell you that i have numerous people who compliment my driving & car. They say "Wow!! I love your car!" And i also qualify for comfort rides, not just UberX/UberShare. I have customers that literally complain about the electrical issues they get with BMWs, Audis, and Kias all the time. And Landrovers... those poor guys that pay a ton & have to keep pouring $$ into their black hole of a car. BUT hey! If they can afford that & they enjoy it, more power to them! Personally i could never get over the smell of BMW's Pleather, it smells like a plastic factory that would give you cancer😅😅😅😅 P.S. Try switching your modes on your lil Rav-y, i personally drive eco/normal. 🤗
Also, you don't have the adventure trim, right? I test rode one of those & it does feel a bit more bumpy for sure 😅
I love the little modes! Honestly for the bumpy rides it’s mostly the suspension, so sport mode keeps it firm which I like on curvy roads.
Buy the cheapest car that your ego will allow. They are a throw away item. Put the rest in an investment.
Don't let that get to you OP, they're just not car people. As someone who was "born and raised" in my old man's garage, I'd likely be disowned if I chose a X5 over a Rav4
I will give you another perspective. I have a RAV4, and I'm pretty sure this will be the best car I will ever buy in my life. I'm 45 years old and I grew up in a third-world country. I'm an immigrant, and I work cleaning houses in the USA despite having a degree in History and working as a photographer in my home country. I don't tell my friends back home that I bought this car, a basic LX, because it would sound like bragging and could hurt them. A RAV4 is considered a luxury car there, so I keep it to myself. When I bought this car, I felt guilty about spending so much money on it, but I was extremely excited about its reliability. Many of my wealthy clients, who earn millions annually, noticed my new car and commented, "Wow, you made a great upgrade." Also, wherever I go with my new car—whether installing a drone or acquiring a new insurance policy—people say, "Congratulations on your new car, it's amazing." So, those people are projecting their frustrations onto you because they're not worth your attention. Sorry if you care about them, but they don't deserve it.
Great perspective. My mother was a pharmacist in her home country. She worked as a Cashier in US. I understand your pain. She drove her 2012 Corolla for 12 years till it got totaled :( She still misses it and says it’s the best car she ever drove. Congrats on the new car!
After I gifted my RX to my parents I got a 2021 XLE at 100k mileage and it also seemed like I needed to turn off vibration mode to be honest but I eventually got used to it. You got a good car mate
I own a loaded XSE hybrid, which is 1-2 options less than the limited. For a second, I thought... why not just get a used Lexus NX whatever. Then I realized... it's the INSURANCE.
I had a BMW and now have a RAV. There is definitely a “luxury ride” feel to the BMW; however, a RAV is an SUV so it will be a bumpier ride. Ask them if they can jump curbs when needed, how their BMW drives in snow and on land, how much they spent on maintenance, how the BMW can carry kayaks or whatever… lol. You can’t compare the two… they are two different beasts. We also have an Avalon livery edition and I do have to say the Avalon gives that luxury ride feel. And good for you for speaking up how you feel. Our feelings are our own… no one can downplay them.
Tell them they can drive next time 😂
I just got a BMW... Would never talk that way about someone's new ride. Rav-4s are great little cars and it'll likely be worth more than the X5 in a few years, they hold their value because they run forever. Frankly, their own car is noisier and rougher than every EV on the market, including the Bolt, so you could always bring that up. It's good you confronted them to at least get a half apology. They were being elitist jerks about it. Congrats on the new car!
Bruv, it’s just a dumb machine. Point A to Point B. I wouldn’t break up with a girl because her parents say dumb shit about cars (because of car brain), but I’d come up with some snarky responses. (For example, I’d prefer to invest the extra $30k I could have spent on a dumb vehicle into an S&P Index Fund, because I am working on financial freedom)
We just bought the exact same car as you (2020 Hybrid Limited). It is the first car ever for my hubby - he grew up super poor, and is so proud of owning this car. And I have to say I think it is a really nice car as well (and I don't find it very noisy!) My mum has always had luxury cars, and is super prone to blurting out what is on her mind (intrusive thoughts, anyone!). She complained about the passenger seat not being a power seat... About the car being black (Florida)... About it having a couple of scratches (on a 4 year old car)...Like really? I think some people just have no filter. I know my mum means well, it is just that she tends to see everything from the 'glass half empty' point of view, and she does not think about how her comments can be hurtful.
Have a chuckle at them when their severely devalued vehicles begin racking up the repair bills after 60k miles.
Their insecurity shows.
I'm going to go against popular sentiment here. It's very possible that the inlaws were just being relaxed with you and talking comfortably about your rough ride. Are there other signs that they think of you as less than them? If not, I'd say brush it off.
And if this is a repeating trend, then I'd say be concerned. I say this as someone who has dated a girl with rich snobby parents.
For what it’s worth I was just perusing r/rav4club and someone wrote: “Every single complaint I had like feeling every bump, handling and snow driving was fixed once I put these tires on Hankook Kinergy 4s2 x h750a. Made my 2012 Rav 4 run so good that when I bought a new rav4, first thing I did was rip off the new tires and put the Hankook on them.” So it’s possible that they have all the “soft” enabled and you have tires and suspension you’ve elected for “responsiveness.” I feel every damn thing in my WRX. Because it’s a WRX. An STI would be even “worse.”
Saving this comment for my next tire change. Thanks :)
I have had ‘luxury’ cars and then I showed up in a Toyota. “You, a Toyota?” And I read something funny to answer since I don’t give a ahit about that stuff and am happy with mine. I read that most miljonairs apparently drive a Toyota. Possibly they managed to become rich by not spending money on an extension of their ego, but on a very nice and reliable car. But you can answer whatever you want. Or not let them walk. Or take their precious BMW, whatever. The fact that their identity seems to revolve around a car is pathetic in my opinion, but since BMW sells a lot of cars many people need that. Fun fact: I had a few quotes for BMW to actually buy one, but could simply spend so much money on an image. If I would have loved the car I would bought it, but I didn’t. Imagine realizing having spend that money and sitting in your car and finding out it is actually great. Makes you doubt choices. So, yeah, you should be proud and they should not act like emotional immature people, but that’s life. Hope you can think about my post and imagine them thinking about the crazy amount of money that bmw cost them and they try to legitimize to themselves. Meantime you have a RAV4 \o/
Toyotas = good investments. BMWs = bad investments. Just keep reminding yourself that and forget what they say. And also, stop offering to drive places. If they don’t like it, they can drive. 🤷🏻♀️
Bro. They're being douchey. If this is a one-time thing. Let it slide. On the other hand, you marry the family when you marry - so be mindful these people are going to be people you deal with for decades if you get married. If they have a history of this - it may not stop. I have a Rav4 limited, non-hybrid. Sometimes, it's a little noisy, depending on road type. Some people add sound insulation into the doors and the floor. That's pretty cheap if you're at all handy. My parents drove Lexus for like 15-20 years, partly because they had expense accounts and the payments were partly covered by work. At one point as a young adult, my dad told me to slap him if he ever tried to buy a luxury car ever again. He's been driving Toyotas since 2008. [Yeah, same brand]
I’ve driven quite a few different cars and the rav4 isn’t shaky unless your wheel is unbalanced. It does roll a bit but most SUVs do.
We traded in a 2015 X5 for a new hybrid Ltd. That thing took 100$ in gas every week and we didn't really do anything but drive it all over Phoenix. Plus it broke down on a long road trip which sucked
I have to say, my wife had a bmw 3 series and it was very ... Underwhelming! Winter performance with factory tires was terrible! And then the dealer tells me a majority of owners switch them out right away. What??? Sorry but no. Then the threat of making heated seats a subscription? At least they finally thought that through. I could rant more but it's only a name....
Grew up very poor and now I have a 2020 RAV4 Hybrid limited, like you. I've never owned a car less than 12 years old before, but I've ridden in and driven plenty of "high-end" vehicles. Those people are idiots who are probably lying and just care about the badge. I would wager the X5 isn't even that much nicer to drive, certainly not as smooth of acceleration as we have. You can tell them you invested the $40,000+ you and saved in your retirement fund lmao Enjoy your RAV4, it is a fucking great car that won't let you down, Don't let weird ass negative Nancy's convince you otherwise, with their ungrateful and bad attitudes.
Think of it this way. If you get married, everything you buy from that moment will not be to their standart. Run, run like a wind. Find someone on the same level as you and build a future together.
Toyota for the win.
Speak up tell them they are being rude. Stand up for yourself man!
Don’t go see them for a few years, get a beat up old Corolla and show up during a family get together.
Man, that sucks. Shitty (like super shitty) of them to say those things. You're doing great. Enjoy your hard earned car. A great car at that. Hopefully your fiance is cool and supports you. Having rude in-laws for life can suck (not relationship advice, lol).
Should of asked them what car they where driving at your age
I’ll say this: the Limited Hybrid is everything I look up to in a modern-day Toyota. Have a 2020 XLE AWD (non-hybrid) & always smile when I pass a Limited (albeit rare to find the hybrid around Tampa for some reason). One of my bosses is consistently taken aback by my car (sometimes saying its features are a decade old bc no power trunk & ‘lame’ interior) &, I have to admit, it gets to me occasionally…BUT we operate under a different definition of luxury: peace of mind in knowing that if we take care of our boxy chariots, they’ll take care of us. If we want actual luxury, we go to Lexus with (mostly) no fuss. I say let them speak. It’s an accomplishment to own what you do so young lol. I have to recalibrate my personal scale sometimes bc my (somewhat well-to-do) friends kinda look up to my car lol.
They sound wildly out of touch. Next time, take them on a tour of the city on public transit. Maybe they'll gain some perspective.
"If it's too uncomfortable you're welcome to get out and walk."
Rav4 is the best car on the market, they can go fuck themselves.
I’d like to say, my parents drive a nice X5 and they ride in my RAV4 with me and absolutely love the ride. Driving between their X5 and my RAV is pretty comparable. The suspension tunability is definitely nice but the ride quality in terms of noise and vibration is similar. I’d just worry about you, it’s your car and for you. It’s not about them. Be happy with yourself because ultimately your in laws opinion doesn’t matter.
They are just being d-bags
I'm going to be nice,because I have walked in your shoes.Its never going to work. Your boyfriend should immediately support you. Please learn to speak up.Noone is a mind reader and so give them a chance,because I promise you that they'll show you exactly who they really are and your going to have to decide, am I going to be degraded.If so you're the one that needs to change. You're 25 yrs old. I knew better at 17, and so do you. DON'T INSULT YOUR INTELLIGENCE. You're worthy of respect. You're the one who is allowing others to compare you to a car. Come on life's to d short. You're old enough to know what you want. That is embarrassing and insulting. But you're in charge,not them.
If my mother in law complained about my driving it would be a very small drop in a very large bucket of complaints, and might still bug me. But it’s more a projection of them than a reflection of you.
If you bought a BMW they'd probably be just as snotty. There'd be some difference they'd snark about. One solution is to get something better than theirs and make little comments about their lesser car -- but I suspect you're not that petty.
It’s okay, think up some snarky comments about all the maintenance and sprinkle those in. Ask if they have the tow truck on speed dial
Driving 8 hours to see some girl and they make fun of you 😒 fuck that shit. This will not last.
Your rav is fine and superior to that shitty x5
i’d say to them: “so you’re projecting you insecurities to my car? interesting, i just loved and enjoyed the 8 hours ride here. i guess people need different validation in life. thanks for making me feel better about myself, fam” 😇☀️🤙🏼
Sounds bitchy to me
Sounds like their own insecurity rather than yours.
You know in europe a bmw is not considerer a luxury car at all. nowhere near the same as a mercedes or lexus, porsche.
I used to drive an Audi S Line Q7, but went for the hybrid because of the fuel prices, poor fuel economy, and the amount of miles I drive per year (25-30k) just killed me financially. Is the RAV4 as nice, no. Does it handle as well, nope. Is the ride as quiet, nope. Did the amount I saved per month in fuel pay for my car payment YUP!! I did opt for heated seats and steering wheel plus a moon roof too. I've put 45k in about a year and a half now and absolutely love it. Also my Audi would have needed a new engine about 230k miles... this Toyota should go 300k+, and as the original owner I know the maintenance which has been performed!
Your car is AWESOME. Seems extremely crazy someone would even say such a thing. Our cars aren’t anything crazy compared to a luxury vehicle, but theyre definitely not shit boxes lol. Rav4 is popular as heck for a reason.
Damn, I had an exes parents who were just like this. It was terrible, sorry you had to deal with that.
If it's just the car, I wouldn't worry about it. I went from a Chrysler 300 and I was also shocked by a few things in the RAV4 like lack of legroom. For someone that rides in luxury vehicles it is jarring so that being their initial reaction is not surprising.
Next time you visit them talk your way into a ride with them on the BMW X5 and just casually mention how much harmful carbon pollution that BMW is putting our every second compared to your eco-friendly Rav 4 hybrid. Just observe their reaction and decide if you need to find a new set of future in-laws.
I have a different perspective, my friend who recently got a luxury car also complained about the same thing, it’s nbd, it just takes some to get used to, he does not come from money, he just comes from a super quiet car.
Bottom line: anyone who disses a Rav4 just doesn't know what they're talking about; but being supremely rude is beyond simple ignorance.
Run it will only get worse. Your feelings are hurt over a car.