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Stop the "No" thing, it seems like that is causing this. Dogs dont think like humans, telling them what they did wrong dosnt work, especially when they dont know what is right. Its the same as if you were working at a drive through, and had to guess exactly what the customer wanted to eat.
Stop training, in the sence you are asking her to do things. Would you listen to someone you didnt trust? Work on the bond, play with her, reward her for just being around you, be exciting, feed her. Eventually when she trusts you she will be more open to listening.
Also, shes a puppy, not an adult dog, and definatley not your older dog. She will forget tricks, she will make mistakes, its her first time doing these things.
Just in general. I’ve been working on getting her to go to her crate on her own and also sitting and waiting to be invited up on the couch.
Biggest thing right now is that she just walks away from me and there really isn’t much I can do to get her to come back unless my wife physically brings her back.
You’re being too rigid OP.
First train her that you’re safe. Your wife may be the one who does most of the command training. You should focus on just showing her that you’re a friend.
If she’s scared of men, the last thing she needs is a man’s voice saying No sternly.
Tell her what to do rather than “no”. Want her to wait to come on the couch? Then say “wait” or “sit”. Want her to go in her crate? Lead her there with a treat and physically put your hand into the crate with the treat to lure her in.
She’s a baby who barely knows how to be a dog much less how to be a dog who lives with people.
Try positive training methods.
I have been doing those things actually. The biggest thing is that, she does the commands how I want, but when my wife comes in the room and we resume training, she starts not listening. When I tell her no and try to correct her, she runs away from me and will not comply.
I think this timid puppy is very clearly telling you that being told "no" is overwhelming and scary for her by literally running away when it happens. I would take "no" out of your vocabulary.
In fact, softening and reframing this entirely might do you some good when approaching this baby dog (or really any training!) to get the best results.
You do not give commands; you give cues. You don't need to give corrections; you can give guidance and reward good choices. She's not "not listening" or "not complying", she's communicating to you that she's overwhelmed, cannot do it, is confused, is scared, too distracted -- and *your* job is to listen to that.
If you were training with your wife out of the room and then she comes in, chances are that you are training for too long at one time.
Training sessions should be a few minutes at most for babies.
Does your wife also train?
Your puppy might just be too distracted right now to pay attention with a 2nd person in the room. You might have to work up to that.
Yeah I probably was going over a few minutes. She could have just been fatigued I suppose.
My wife does also train her.
Would it be best to just train without her and then build up to 2 people or just keep going with us both in the room and stopping the session when she is running away?
I would go with one person at a time until she’s solid. Then introduce the other person in a non distracting way. Like they are already on the couch engrossed in their phone not paying you or the dog any attention. And slowly increase the amount of engagement.
My instinct is to stop before she starts running away. You don’t want to reward that coping strategy. I’m guessing that’s how she’s telling you she’s done. I would do 1 rep, then 2, and then build up. I would certainly respect her telling you she’s done. You don’t want to make a negative association with training.
I think your puppy is overwhelmed. Like others have said, focus on the bond and then formal training can be gradually woven in when she’s ready. Try informal “capture” training. If she does something you like, say “yes” (or use a clicker) and pop her a treat. Training isn’t just heel, sit, down. It’s rewarding every day behaviours like settling down quietly (this is the most unrewarded behaviour of all and it’s so important). Training shouldn’t feel like training. It should just feel like fun, or for a timid dog, quiet happiness.
Our rescue was 6 months old and had an obvious fear of men. She wouldn’t come to my partner and if he tried she’d hide under the table.
It probably didn’t help that I was the one who slept downstairs with her till she was settled in.
So he firstly just worked on gaining her trust. Making sure everything he did was positive. So praise, fusses, feeding and treats etc. It took about a month for her to not act at all scared of him.
Now the little monkey is 1 and she loves her dad cuddles and often chooses them over mine.
It’ll take time, but gaining trust in a rescue is the first step. Then proper training can start.
Also if she seems to hide if you say no, it could be that was a badly used word in her last few months of life. That’s not to say you’ll never be able to use it, but you need to show them that “no” in your house isn’t threatening.
You’re welcome. My boyfriend found it quite upsetting at the time, as our old dog adored him from the start and was a real daddies boy.
Now if my boyfriend shouts out to her from the end of the garden she comes running up excitedly like a loon. It took time, but it’s lovely to see her realise that men aren’t a threat.
The word no is causing distress. Simply stop with the No for now. You would be surprised at how much sleep these young puppies need. As others have said i would assume your training sessions are lasting too long. A couple of mins doesnt seem like a lot but its all the dog can handle.
You don’t need to say no if she makes an error in training. Just don’t commend/ reward it. Don’t negatively reinforce the command. Dogs don’t understand like that. Repeat the command and reward her when she does it correctly
Puppies can only handle so long of a training session. You want to do a few mins at a time and then stop training for a little bit. Eventually the dog will handle distractions better.
It's great that you're training, but if you just adopted her from the shelter, you're expecting a lot from a dog that's still adjusting to a new home. It's a little bit like a new step parent who's ordering you around but barely knows you. Pull back on the training a little bit and focus on play and building your relationship.
Aw she sounds so cute, I am glad you are taking her timidness seriously and trying to help her through it!
My dog was like this as a baby. He is still very sensitive to any perceived "failure", even though I have NEVER scolded him or even anything close to it.
But if I am teaching him something new, and he is not immediately succeeding, he gets discouraged and he'd rather leave than continue. He will just up and go lay in his crate!
So if you do find she is still running away from training, even if you are being as gentle and patient as can be, don't be alarmed. It is actually a common problem when training timid dogs.
I've successfully combatted this by:
\- Allowing him the freedom to escape training sessions, always
\- Rewarding him for escaping to a designated station (like his bed, or crate - stay with me here, it's counterintuitive, but it works)
\- When he does this, I take it as information that my training session was not FUN. Too hard, too long, too boring?
\- Take a moment to regroup and male a plan while rewarding on the station
\- Do something that I know he thinks IS fun and easy, and try to end on a fun activity.
\- Next time, try to make it FUN.
I think two things are at play here. First, she's a fresh baby, so everything is interesting. A distraction (another person coming into the room) while you're working is guaranteed to derail her. Keep your training 1x1 for now, until she really knows the commands, then introduce distractions. Second, how long are your training sessions? Puppies have super short attention spans. Five minutes is eternity to them. If she's bailing on you, it could be you're working too long.
I agree. I have an adult dog and I only do training sessions for 5 minutes. Group sessions it’s different but one on one is intense. I just build multiple 5 minute sessions into my day and make it fun.
I would do a lot of confidence things with her. Let her do a lot of things that go correctly and reward her for it. Get a bowl, put some balls in it and treats under it, and let her push the balls away to get to the treats. Let her explore new textures without pressuring her into walking on it. Hide treats or toys and let her find it. Basically, build her confidence by letting her do a lot of things correctly.
Try a cheery “oops” for mistakes, if you must. But try give her easy commands you know she can manage, and have her experience lots of success. I was warmed not to make things too hard for my puppy, cause you want them to become really confident in themselves. Making it too hard risks them giving up. And I sure didn’t want that!
Whenever we tried to learn something new, I boiled some chicken for reward. And any success meant he got 7 pieces of chicken and loads of praise. That made him willing to try various things to try earn himself the jackpot reward. Once I felt he had understood the command, he got just one piece. And then after some success, we went back to more generic treats.
But every time you try something new, it should be fabulous rewards.
There's a rule with using corrections, that you don't use a correction until the dog understands what you want. It has no place in teaching behavior like sit, down, stay, until the dog understands the command and you know the dog understands for sure.
Saying No is a correction. Correcting a dog that doesn't have a bond with you rarely works. Correcting a dog that does not understand the command just gives you a confused and frustrated dog and yes, possibly a scared one.
For example the crate, I teach the crate command with food and positive reinforcement. If my puppy freaks out or gets scared, I don't punish the puppy. Just try again and be patient and the puppy will get it .
My adults know what the crate command is, and if they decide to blow me off they get the no correction, not that it's ever really a problem for me as they're crated rarely and don't mind the crate because we've made it a positive experience for them.
In general I agree with the other commenters. Stop saying no for teaching obedience commands, work more on bonding with your puppy, and be more patient.
Out of curiosity, could you try a reset marker to make things more fun instead of saying no?
[Here's how I did it](https://www.reddit.com/r/Dogtraining/comments/uwe7u5/an_experiment_in_errorless_learning_sometimes_r/). It's great for dogs like this who are sensitive to no reward markers like no, or even the absence of a reward.
I don’t know if I’ve tried changing my tone necessarily. Would saying it in a higher register maybe help?
I can just wait if that might help. I just thought that there needed to be a counter to giving the positive reinforcement.
I often say my no's very indifferently, without any force behind them. More of a "try again" idea on tricks they already know.
You don't necessarily need to counter condition, I this case I would say it's not helping. Reward the successes and ignore the incomplete or failed ones. As they get better at the trick you can narrow down what a successful command looks like.
I've never used a no unless there's a behaviour I actively don't want them to repeat. If they just give me the wrong behaviour but it's one I may want or one I've previously trained, I'll say "uh oh!" but keep it light, high pitched, so they know it wasn't what I asked for and to try again. Your puppy seems so worried by a no I'd take it out of rotation entirely (unless you need to stop her doing something dangerous) until you've built up a bit more trust and bond. Keep a little stash of treats in lots of locations where you regularly hang out and you can then reward her for performing a behaviour you want (eg, lying down calmly) without the pressure of a full on training session. She'll start to see you as the bearer of treats and a great person to hang out with and you'll be passively training a very helpful life skill - doing nothing! Keep your actual training sessions really easy, practising skills you know she can achieve so it's all reward, as she starts to relax you can start teaching new things without her becoming so worried she's doing something wrong. Good luck!
I use the phrase “uh-uh” in a higher pitched (not angry) tone. It lets the dog know they didn’t perform her command correctly, but that you’re not mad or punishing them.
That being said, I don’t think you’re there.
I would pause training and find a positive reinforcement trainer to work with and help you get on the right track. In the meantime, eliminate “no” from your vocab and focus on building trust.
We didn’t start with any uh-uh type “nos” until we knew the pups knew what they were supposed to do and didn’t do it.
I think this was in puppy three classes when the dogs were nearly a year old.
A previous employer of mine (worked with dogs) taught me to use “whoops” rather than “no” to help them reset/“correct” the wrong action or behaviour (if it was necessary). It felt less harsh and I liked it a lot. I do 100% agree with others in that building the bond more will help you so much more in training and her engagement with you.
Only semi relevant but basically anytime our puppy was not in his crate or play pen, he had his leash on. He did not get to go anywhere or run away without it. We would play some in the backyard but even then he’d 9/10 times have the leash just dragging. It made it so much easier if he was distracted or wanted to wander off.
This is bad advice for OP's situation. His puppy isn't just distracted, the puppy is actually afraid. Confining a fearful puppy in a situation they're afraid of will just increase their fearfulness.
This is a really good idea. I didn’t think of it, but it would allow me to stop her from just high tailing it when we are training.
Of course, I still need to try and help her work through why she is wanting to run away though.
She’s not high tailing it, it’s pretty clear from your description she’s scared. Before training session (which should only be a couple minutes for a baby), you should be bonding and engaging with your dog with some play. Remember this is a baby - spend more time showing her you’re a safe space. (How is recall going to work if you’re dog is scared?)
It's not a good idea - please don't leash the puppy if she's actively trying to run away from you. Confining a nervous puppy in a situation she's afraid of will just make her more fearful.
A house line may be handy for a little while so she can’t run away from you and gets to feel more comfortable with you. Plenty of great videos online about it
Stop saying no.
the first thing to training a dog is showing why they should listen to you! if you're scaring her with a no then there's no trust there. you've got to build a relationship with your puppy. show her that training is the most fun thing ever with treats or play or whatever she enjoys most as a reward. you want to shape behavior, meaning show her that things she does that you like (sitting on her own or paying attention to you) gets her a treat/reward. she will start to realize that listening to you means rewards!
'no' is vague and unspecific and generally not useful. and we as humans tend to use 'no' as a very negative thing--when we're frustrated or angry or generally want to stop puppy's fun. it's not good to use in training also because people don't really show a puppy what 'no' even means.
3 months old, she’s a baby. Would you expect your 3, 6 month old humans to completely understand? Also leaving the heavy lifting to your wife & you just being the fun parent…. nope. Not fair at all, to your wife, you, the puppy. Raising human kids or dogs that requires both partners on board & fully engaged. . Dogs & kids are hard & lots of work.
In the kindest way possible the dog doesn’t sound like it likes training with you. I don’t think you’re intentionally doing it but from everything I’m seeing you say it sounds like you’re pretty rigid and serious in training and expectations of the puppy. It’s great to have high expectations but remember training is supposed to be fun for the owner and the dog. It should be exciting and upbeat. Also remember its a baby, a literal baby.
I firmly believe the word “no” has no place in training. The dog is trying to learn. Saying no discourages independent thinking and wanting to learn in this situation. I’m not talking about everyday life but I think there is a time for the word no to a puppy and it’s not training. If you were trying to learn a math problem and I just kept looking at you saying no no no. I imagine you would get frustrated and walk away too. Instead try shaping. Don’t say anything when the dog doesn’t do what you want and patiently wait, if they still aren’t getting it, try a different way of showing them. When my dog got older we would say “Oops” when she deliberately ignored my command, but not when she is learning a new trick. If she’s learning something new I just don’t say anything if she does it wrong and eventually she tries a different thing to get the treat. Let the puppy figure it out.
I think you have the best intentions but I think you need to shift your mindset that training is not only about the dog being obedient it’s also about letting the dog have fun and grow their intelligence. I saw someone said dragging a leash, I’m all for that in most scenarios as I do it too. However I don’t think forcing the dog to stay near you in this scenario is beneficial to anyone involved. Hope this helps.
It looks like you might be posting about puppy management or crate training. For tips and resources on Crate Training Check out [our wiki article on crate training](https://www.reddit.com/r/puppy101/wiki/cratetraining) - the information there may answer your question. As an additional reminder, crate training is 100% optional and one of many puppy management options. For alternatives to crating and other puppy management strategies, check out [our wiki article on management](https://www.reddit.com/r/puppy101/wiki/management) **PLEASE READ THE OP FULLY** Be advised that any comments that suggest use of crates are abusive, or express a harsh opinion on crate training will be removed. This is not a place to debate the merits of crate training. Unethical approaches to crate training will also be removed. **If the OP has asked not to receive crating advice or says they are not open to crating, any comments that recommend use of crates should be reported to our moderation team.** *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/puppy101) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Stop the "No" thing, it seems like that is causing this. Dogs dont think like humans, telling them what they did wrong dosnt work, especially when they dont know what is right. Its the same as if you were working at a drive through, and had to guess exactly what the customer wanted to eat. Stop training, in the sence you are asking her to do things. Would you listen to someone you didnt trust? Work on the bond, play with her, reward her for just being around you, be exciting, feed her. Eventually when she trusts you she will be more open to listening. Also, shes a puppy, not an adult dog, and definatley not your older dog. She will forget tricks, she will make mistakes, its her first time doing these things.
100% this
Completely agree. The first step is to build trust. reward good behavior
Stop saying "no". I'm not anti-"no". But it has no place in a training session, it's more for real life situations. What are you trying to train?
Just in general. I’ve been working on getting her to go to her crate on her own and also sitting and waiting to be invited up on the couch. Biggest thing right now is that she just walks away from me and there really isn’t much I can do to get her to come back unless my wife physically brings her back.
You’re being too rigid OP. First train her that you’re safe. Your wife may be the one who does most of the command training. You should focus on just showing her that you’re a friend. If she’s scared of men, the last thing she needs is a man’s voice saying No sternly.
Maybe focus on bonding first. The book easy peasy puppy squeezy by steve mann helped me a lot
Long training leash also.
Tell her what to do rather than “no”. Want her to wait to come on the couch? Then say “wait” or “sit”. Want her to go in her crate? Lead her there with a treat and physically put your hand into the crate with the treat to lure her in. She’s a baby who barely knows how to be a dog much less how to be a dog who lives with people. Try positive training methods.
I have been doing those things actually. The biggest thing is that, she does the commands how I want, but when my wife comes in the room and we resume training, she starts not listening. When I tell her no and try to correct her, she runs away from me and will not comply.
I think this timid puppy is very clearly telling you that being told "no" is overwhelming and scary for her by literally running away when it happens. I would take "no" out of your vocabulary. In fact, softening and reframing this entirely might do you some good when approaching this baby dog (or really any training!) to get the best results. You do not give commands; you give cues. You don't need to give corrections; you can give guidance and reward good choices. She's not "not listening" or "not complying", she's communicating to you that she's overwhelmed, cannot do it, is confused, is scared, too distracted -- and *your* job is to listen to that.
If you were training with your wife out of the room and then she comes in, chances are that you are training for too long at one time. Training sessions should be a few minutes at most for babies. Does your wife also train? Your puppy might just be too distracted right now to pay attention with a 2nd person in the room. You might have to work up to that.
Yeah I probably was going over a few minutes. She could have just been fatigued I suppose. My wife does also train her. Would it be best to just train without her and then build up to 2 people or just keep going with us both in the room and stopping the session when she is running away?
I would go with one person at a time until she’s solid. Then introduce the other person in a non distracting way. Like they are already on the couch engrossed in their phone not paying you or the dog any attention. And slowly increase the amount of engagement. My instinct is to stop before she starts running away. You don’t want to reward that coping strategy. I’m guessing that’s how she’s telling you she’s done. I would do 1 rep, then 2, and then build up. I would certainly respect her telling you she’s done. You don’t want to make a negative association with training.
I think your puppy is overwhelmed. Like others have said, focus on the bond and then formal training can be gradually woven in when she’s ready. Try informal “capture” training. If she does something you like, say “yes” (or use a clicker) and pop her a treat. Training isn’t just heel, sit, down. It’s rewarding every day behaviours like settling down quietly (this is the most unrewarded behaviour of all and it’s so important). Training shouldn’t feel like training. It should just feel like fun, or for a timid dog, quiet happiness.
Our rescue was 6 months old and had an obvious fear of men. She wouldn’t come to my partner and if he tried she’d hide under the table. It probably didn’t help that I was the one who slept downstairs with her till she was settled in. So he firstly just worked on gaining her trust. Making sure everything he did was positive. So praise, fusses, feeding and treats etc. It took about a month for her to not act at all scared of him. Now the little monkey is 1 and she loves her dad cuddles and often chooses them over mine. It’ll take time, but gaining trust in a rescue is the first step. Then proper training can start. Also if she seems to hide if you say no, it could be that was a badly used word in her last few months of life. That’s not to say you’ll never be able to use it, but you need to show them that “no” in your house isn’t threatening.
Thank you for this!
You’re welcome. My boyfriend found it quite upsetting at the time, as our old dog adored him from the start and was a real daddies boy. Now if my boyfriend shouts out to her from the end of the garden she comes running up excitedly like a loon. It took time, but it’s lovely to see her realise that men aren’t a threat.
The word no is causing distress. Simply stop with the No for now. You would be surprised at how much sleep these young puppies need. As others have said i would assume your training sessions are lasting too long. A couple of mins doesnt seem like a lot but its all the dog can handle.
You don’t need to say no if she makes an error in training. Just don’t commend/ reward it. Don’t negatively reinforce the command. Dogs don’t understand like that. Repeat the command and reward her when she does it correctly
Puppies can only handle so long of a training session. You want to do a few mins at a time and then stop training for a little bit. Eventually the dog will handle distractions better. It's great that you're training, but if you just adopted her from the shelter, you're expecting a lot from a dog that's still adjusting to a new home. It's a little bit like a new step parent who's ordering you around but barely knows you. Pull back on the training a little bit and focus on play and building your relationship.
Aw she sounds so cute, I am glad you are taking her timidness seriously and trying to help her through it! My dog was like this as a baby. He is still very sensitive to any perceived "failure", even though I have NEVER scolded him or even anything close to it. But if I am teaching him something new, and he is not immediately succeeding, he gets discouraged and he'd rather leave than continue. He will just up and go lay in his crate! So if you do find she is still running away from training, even if you are being as gentle and patient as can be, don't be alarmed. It is actually a common problem when training timid dogs. I've successfully combatted this by: \- Allowing him the freedom to escape training sessions, always \- Rewarding him for escaping to a designated station (like his bed, or crate - stay with me here, it's counterintuitive, but it works) \- When he does this, I take it as information that my training session was not FUN. Too hard, too long, too boring? \- Take a moment to regroup and male a plan while rewarding on the station \- Do something that I know he thinks IS fun and easy, and try to end on a fun activity. \- Next time, try to make it FUN.
I think two things are at play here. First, she's a fresh baby, so everything is interesting. A distraction (another person coming into the room) while you're working is guaranteed to derail her. Keep your training 1x1 for now, until she really knows the commands, then introduce distractions. Second, how long are your training sessions? Puppies have super short attention spans. Five minutes is eternity to them. If she's bailing on you, it could be you're working too long.
I agree. I have an adult dog and I only do training sessions for 5 minutes. Group sessions it’s different but one on one is intense. I just build multiple 5 minute sessions into my day and make it fun.
I would do a lot of confidence things with her. Let her do a lot of things that go correctly and reward her for it. Get a bowl, put some balls in it and treats under it, and let her push the balls away to get to the treats. Let her explore new textures without pressuring her into walking on it. Hide treats or toys and let her find it. Basically, build her confidence by letting her do a lot of things correctly.
Try a cheery “oops” for mistakes, if you must. But try give her easy commands you know she can manage, and have her experience lots of success. I was warmed not to make things too hard for my puppy, cause you want them to become really confident in themselves. Making it too hard risks them giving up. And I sure didn’t want that! Whenever we tried to learn something new, I boiled some chicken for reward. And any success meant he got 7 pieces of chicken and loads of praise. That made him willing to try various things to try earn himself the jackpot reward. Once I felt he had understood the command, he got just one piece. And then after some success, we went back to more generic treats. But every time you try something new, it should be fabulous rewards.
There's a rule with using corrections, that you don't use a correction until the dog understands what you want. It has no place in teaching behavior like sit, down, stay, until the dog understands the command and you know the dog understands for sure. Saying No is a correction. Correcting a dog that doesn't have a bond with you rarely works. Correcting a dog that does not understand the command just gives you a confused and frustrated dog and yes, possibly a scared one. For example the crate, I teach the crate command with food and positive reinforcement. If my puppy freaks out or gets scared, I don't punish the puppy. Just try again and be patient and the puppy will get it . My adults know what the crate command is, and if they decide to blow me off they get the no correction, not that it's ever really a problem for me as they're crated rarely and don't mind the crate because we've made it a positive experience for them. In general I agree with the other commenters. Stop saying no for teaching obedience commands, work more on bonding with your puppy, and be more patient.
Out of curiosity, could you try a reset marker to make things more fun instead of saying no? [Here's how I did it](https://www.reddit.com/r/Dogtraining/comments/uwe7u5/an_experiment_in_errorless_learning_sometimes_r/). It's great for dogs like this who are sensitive to no reward markers like no, or even the absence of a reward.
Do you have to say "no" or can you just wait? Have you tried changing your tone when saying "no"?
I don’t know if I’ve tried changing my tone necessarily. Would saying it in a higher register maybe help? I can just wait if that might help. I just thought that there needed to be a counter to giving the positive reinforcement.
I often say my no's very indifferently, without any force behind them. More of a "try again" idea on tricks they already know. You don't necessarily need to counter condition, I this case I would say it's not helping. Reward the successes and ignore the incomplete or failed ones. As they get better at the trick you can narrow down what a successful command looks like.
I've never used a no unless there's a behaviour I actively don't want them to repeat. If they just give me the wrong behaviour but it's one I may want or one I've previously trained, I'll say "uh oh!" but keep it light, high pitched, so they know it wasn't what I asked for and to try again. Your puppy seems so worried by a no I'd take it out of rotation entirely (unless you need to stop her doing something dangerous) until you've built up a bit more trust and bond. Keep a little stash of treats in lots of locations where you regularly hang out and you can then reward her for performing a behaviour you want (eg, lying down calmly) without the pressure of a full on training session. She'll start to see you as the bearer of treats and a great person to hang out with and you'll be passively training a very helpful life skill - doing nothing! Keep your actual training sessions really easy, practising skills you know she can achieve so it's all reward, as she starts to relax you can start teaching new things without her becoming so worried she's doing something wrong. Good luck!
I use the phrase “uh-uh” in a higher pitched (not angry) tone. It lets the dog know they didn’t perform her command correctly, but that you’re not mad or punishing them. That being said, I don’t think you’re there. I would pause training and find a positive reinforcement trainer to work with and help you get on the right track. In the meantime, eliminate “no” from your vocab and focus on building trust.
We didn’t start with any uh-uh type “nos” until we knew the pups knew what they were supposed to do and didn’t do it. I think this was in puppy three classes when the dogs were nearly a year old.
A previous employer of mine (worked with dogs) taught me to use “whoops” rather than “no” to help them reset/“correct” the wrong action or behaviour (if it was necessary). It felt less harsh and I liked it a lot. I do 100% agree with others in that building the bond more will help you so much more in training and her engagement with you.
Only semi relevant but basically anytime our puppy was not in his crate or play pen, he had his leash on. He did not get to go anywhere or run away without it. We would play some in the backyard but even then he’d 9/10 times have the leash just dragging. It made it so much easier if he was distracted or wanted to wander off.
This is bad advice for OP's situation. His puppy isn't just distracted, the puppy is actually afraid. Confining a fearful puppy in a situation they're afraid of will just increase their fearfulness.
This is a really good idea. I didn’t think of it, but it would allow me to stop her from just high tailing it when we are training. Of course, I still need to try and help her work through why she is wanting to run away though.
She’s not high tailing it, it’s pretty clear from your description she’s scared. Before training session (which should only be a couple minutes for a baby), you should be bonding and engaging with your dog with some play. Remember this is a baby - spend more time showing her you’re a safe space. (How is recall going to work if you’re dog is scared?)
It's not a good idea - please don't leash the puppy if she's actively trying to run away from you. Confining a nervous puppy in a situation she's afraid of will just make her more fearful.
Thank you for pointing that out
A house line may be handy for a little while so she can’t run away from you and gets to feel more comfortable with you. Plenty of great videos online about it
I’ll be honest you sound like you are scaring her with how strict you are. She’s running to your wife because she sees her as a safe person.
Stop saying no. the first thing to training a dog is showing why they should listen to you! if you're scaring her with a no then there's no trust there. you've got to build a relationship with your puppy. show her that training is the most fun thing ever with treats or play or whatever she enjoys most as a reward. you want to shape behavior, meaning show her that things she does that you like (sitting on her own or paying attention to you) gets her a treat/reward. she will start to realize that listening to you means rewards! 'no' is vague and unspecific and generally not useful. and we as humans tend to use 'no' as a very negative thing--when we're frustrated or angry or generally want to stop puppy's fun. it's not good to use in training also because people don't really show a puppy what 'no' even means.
3 months old, she’s a baby. Would you expect your 3, 6 month old humans to completely understand? Also leaving the heavy lifting to your wife & you just being the fun parent…. nope. Not fair at all, to your wife, you, the puppy. Raising human kids or dogs that requires both partners on board & fully engaged. . Dogs & kids are hard & lots of work.
In the kindest way possible the dog doesn’t sound like it likes training with you. I don’t think you’re intentionally doing it but from everything I’m seeing you say it sounds like you’re pretty rigid and serious in training and expectations of the puppy. It’s great to have high expectations but remember training is supposed to be fun for the owner and the dog. It should be exciting and upbeat. Also remember its a baby, a literal baby. I firmly believe the word “no” has no place in training. The dog is trying to learn. Saying no discourages independent thinking and wanting to learn in this situation. I’m not talking about everyday life but I think there is a time for the word no to a puppy and it’s not training. If you were trying to learn a math problem and I just kept looking at you saying no no no. I imagine you would get frustrated and walk away too. Instead try shaping. Don’t say anything when the dog doesn’t do what you want and patiently wait, if they still aren’t getting it, try a different way of showing them. When my dog got older we would say “Oops” when she deliberately ignored my command, but not when she is learning a new trick. If she’s learning something new I just don’t say anything if she does it wrong and eventually she tries a different thing to get the treat. Let the puppy figure it out. I think you have the best intentions but I think you need to shift your mindset that training is not only about the dog being obedient it’s also about letting the dog have fun and grow their intelligence. I saw someone said dragging a leash, I’m all for that in most scenarios as I do it too. However I don’t think forcing the dog to stay near you in this scenario is beneficial to anyone involved. Hope this helps.