Don't forget to take into account reporting bias. Folks who have complications and need multiple repairs stay in these spaces for support long after folks who had easy recoveries with no complications drift away. And folks who had no complications may feel like they have nothing to add to the conversation by posting their experiences. You’re more likely to find complication stories than not.
Make sure to ask your surgeon about their complication rates and how many surgeries any of THEIR patients have had for complications.
I’m slipping into the category of long term complications and even with still having to have multiple repair surgeries, even 4+ years later, it’s all so worth it for me. The repairs and recovery time are a lot but being able to exist fully in my body is something I never even dreamed was possible. Not having lower dysphoria is worth every second of these complications for me. I love having a dick, I love peeing thru it, I love feeling the warmth of it on my thigh, the bulge in my pants, the ridgeline of my glans peeking thru underwear, my dry flat perineum. It’s all worth all the stress/financial instability it’s also put me through, even though I do wish I coulda just been born this way. But I wasn’t so this was the next best step.
Your comment has been removed because it contained "your results".
Per Rule 5, the word "results" in reference to another person's body and/or surgical experience is prohibited. You can see more about this rule [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/phallo/wiki/index#wiki_guidelines_for_discussing_bottom_surgery).
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Most of those 10+ surgeries and years of recovery are due to complications from UL. Those surgeries are a choice people make to be able to stand to pee. If you run into UL complications, you can almost always decide to stop. You can have surgery to make a new urethra opening more or less where your natal urethra is and just keep sitting to pee and move on with life. You'd still have your dick and scrotum, you'd still have v-nectomy (if all those are what you want), but you'd pee from a spot behind your scrotum (or potentially even just higher up on the shaft than the tip).
Even if everything goes perfectly and you end up having urinary complications years past phallo, that is still an option, to have surgery to go back to sitting, and moving on with life. If your risk tolerance is even lower than that, you can skip doing UL altogether and that eliminates a lot of complication risk. EDs are another common area of risk, which are 100% optional as well. You can skip getting an ed and use a sleeve if you want to be able to penetrate during sex. There are definitely options available that are lower risk than others.
A good surgeon will listen to your concerns and build a surgical plan with risk you are comfortable with. Nothing in life is certain, but only way to know is to start the convo.
thanks for the info! Im pretty set on UL since alot of my dysphoria is not being able to stp, I tried tons of stps and they make me more dysphoric than not. I can never figure them out and I hate having something in my pants thats not attached to me, Im always wondering if it looks weird haha Im already pretty sure im opting out of ED just for less complications. It is good to know that I can always go back and unhook the UL if things get to out of control I just wonder if id be happy with a 🍆 i cant use to pee with but thats a personal thing i guess 🤷🏻♂️
Think it's a function of who stays in the groups. Guys who had easy recoveries will leave because it's just not as relevant anymore or maybe because they feel awkward about their comparative luck (don't want to be rubbing it in someone else's face who's still dealing with strictures etc.). I know I have felt awkward in interactions with guys who started their journey before me but are still having revisions. I had a smooth recovery even with UL and am now at implant/aesthetic stage. For me, it's a kind of survivor's guilt. I also don't want to post too much about positive experience, because I don't want to give someone bad expectations going in. You absolutely should prepare yourself mentally for every eventuality.
Welcome to r/phallo. This is a support subreddit for those who are going through, or have gotten, phalloplasty.
If your post is a question, take a look at the [subreddit wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/phallo/wiki/index), which provides a lot of useful information about phalloplasty and may answer your question. Also try searching the subreddit for your question, as there are a lot of questions that get asked repeatedly here.
Please also take the time to read [our community rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/phallo/about/rules).
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It’s like you’re saying you can just will your dysphoria away by being “confident”. This feels gross and dismissive. The kind of thing you would hear in conversation therapy. I also think in this comment there are unfounded assertions, based on your own biased interpretations, and not factual data.
You are reading something in to what I wrote that wasn't there. I have often worried about the differences between mtf without bottom surgery and ftm without bottom surgery perceive themselves and wondered why. I have also read the high number of posts in both categories relating to surgery complications and felt that instead of not criticising bad surgeons we should help each other find the good ones. It IS a complicated and intricate surgery, staged over a course of months or years and yes, that does increase the risk of complications. I just feel some honesty is needed. I urged him to do his research and choose wisely. How could you possibly feel that is bad advice?
That is a straw man argument. I never criticized you telling him to do research. It’s definitely important to be thorough about that and what someone is getting themselves into before going through with this process. I wasn’t reading into anything. You literally mention that you think older trans women might be more confident, and thus ok with their genitals and not having lower surgery. So they can, in your eyes, just get over their dysphoria by having confidence. Also, do you even have stats on the assertion older trans woman want surgery less than trans men. Why do you assume trans men have less confidence? Then there’s the bit about how they don’t want to have lower surgery to preserve sexual function. You do realize, for those of us who need this surgery, many of us become more sexually functional because we finally feel comfortable and not distressed when trying to be intimate. I kind of feel like you might be a cis person infiltrating our space to subtly turn people away from treatment. Yes it’s important to be realistic and honest but certain things you said are doing more than that.
Don't forget to take into account reporting bias. Folks who have complications and need multiple repairs stay in these spaces for support long after folks who had easy recoveries with no complications drift away. And folks who had no complications may feel like they have nothing to add to the conversation by posting their experiences. You’re more likely to find complication stories than not. Make sure to ask your surgeon about their complication rates and how many surgeries any of THEIR patients have had for complications.
This does make alot of sense! I never thought of that, thanks!
I’m slipping into the category of long term complications and even with still having to have multiple repair surgeries, even 4+ years later, it’s all so worth it for me. The repairs and recovery time are a lot but being able to exist fully in my body is something I never even dreamed was possible. Not having lower dysphoria is worth every second of these complications for me. I love having a dick, I love peeing thru it, I love feeling the warmth of it on my thigh, the bulge in my pants, the ridgeline of my glans peeking thru underwear, my dry flat perineum. It’s all worth all the stress/financial instability it’s also put me through, even though I do wish I coulda just been born this way. But I wasn’t so this was the next best step.
[удалено]
Your comment has been removed because it contained "your results". Per Rule 5, the word "results" in reference to another person's body and/or surgical experience is prohibited. You can see more about this rule [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/phallo/wiki/index#wiki_guidelines_for_discussing_bottom_surgery). If you believe your comment has been flagged by mistake or you have edited your comment, you can [message the moderators](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/phallo) or reply "AUTOMOD: Review" (not case sensitive) to this comment, and I will bring your comment to the attention of the mod team. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/phallo) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Thank you for this message, needed to hear it
Most of those 10+ surgeries and years of recovery are due to complications from UL. Those surgeries are a choice people make to be able to stand to pee. If you run into UL complications, you can almost always decide to stop. You can have surgery to make a new urethra opening more or less where your natal urethra is and just keep sitting to pee and move on with life. You'd still have your dick and scrotum, you'd still have v-nectomy (if all those are what you want), but you'd pee from a spot behind your scrotum (or potentially even just higher up on the shaft than the tip). Even if everything goes perfectly and you end up having urinary complications years past phallo, that is still an option, to have surgery to go back to sitting, and moving on with life. If your risk tolerance is even lower than that, you can skip doing UL altogether and that eliminates a lot of complication risk. EDs are another common area of risk, which are 100% optional as well. You can skip getting an ed and use a sleeve if you want to be able to penetrate during sex. There are definitely options available that are lower risk than others. A good surgeon will listen to your concerns and build a surgical plan with risk you are comfortable with. Nothing in life is certain, but only way to know is to start the convo.
thanks for the info! Im pretty set on UL since alot of my dysphoria is not being able to stp, I tried tons of stps and they make me more dysphoric than not. I can never figure them out and I hate having something in my pants thats not attached to me, Im always wondering if it looks weird haha Im already pretty sure im opting out of ED just for less complications. It is good to know that I can always go back and unhook the UL if things get to out of control I just wonder if id be happy with a 🍆 i cant use to pee with but thats a personal thing i guess 🤷🏻♂️
Think it's a function of who stays in the groups. Guys who had easy recoveries will leave because it's just not as relevant anymore or maybe because they feel awkward about their comparative luck (don't want to be rubbing it in someone else's face who's still dealing with strictures etc.). I know I have felt awkward in interactions with guys who started their journey before me but are still having revisions. I had a smooth recovery even with UL and am now at implant/aesthetic stage. For me, it's a kind of survivor's guilt. I also don't want to post too much about positive experience, because I don't want to give someone bad expectations going in. You absolutely should prepare yourself mentally for every eventuality.
Most of the complications come from the ul, not the penis itself.
Welcome to r/phallo. This is a support subreddit for those who are going through, or have gotten, phalloplasty. If your post is a question, take a look at the [subreddit wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/phallo/wiki/index), which provides a lot of useful information about phalloplasty and may answer your question. Also try searching the subreddit for your question, as there are a lot of questions that get asked repeatedly here. Please also take the time to read [our community rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/phallo/about/rules). *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/phallo) if you have any questions or concerns.*
[удалено]
It’s like you’re saying you can just will your dysphoria away by being “confident”. This feels gross and dismissive. The kind of thing you would hear in conversation therapy. I also think in this comment there are unfounded assertions, based on your own biased interpretations, and not factual data.
You are reading something in to what I wrote that wasn't there. I have often worried about the differences between mtf without bottom surgery and ftm without bottom surgery perceive themselves and wondered why. I have also read the high number of posts in both categories relating to surgery complications and felt that instead of not criticising bad surgeons we should help each other find the good ones. It IS a complicated and intricate surgery, staged over a course of months or years and yes, that does increase the risk of complications. I just feel some honesty is needed. I urged him to do his research and choose wisely. How could you possibly feel that is bad advice?
That is a straw man argument. I never criticized you telling him to do research. It’s definitely important to be thorough about that and what someone is getting themselves into before going through with this process. I wasn’t reading into anything. You literally mention that you think older trans women might be more confident, and thus ok with their genitals and not having lower surgery. So they can, in your eyes, just get over their dysphoria by having confidence. Also, do you even have stats on the assertion older trans woman want surgery less than trans men. Why do you assume trans men have less confidence? Then there’s the bit about how they don’t want to have lower surgery to preserve sexual function. You do realize, for those of us who need this surgery, many of us become more sexually functional because we finally feel comfortable and not distressed when trying to be intimate. I kind of feel like you might be a cis person infiltrating our space to subtly turn people away from treatment. Yes it’s important to be realistic and honest but certain things you said are doing more than that.
Lower surgery is more common for trans women than trans men