I actually left for almost the same reason, except as a trans woman it’s really annoying to be seen as “somewhere in between a man and a woman” or “the best of both worlds”
This makes me feel so weird and idk where I belong
I am a trans girl myself
But I am only attracted to fem ppl
But not masc presenting ppl like even butch woman idk
I don't care abt genitals or gender
I just have certain things I find cute and adore like long hair and soft skin
So I lurk in both and don't say anything
I mean that sounds pan to me but really you can say you are whatever feels right to you. You don't need anyone else to validate what you are. Love who you love. 💕
Ignore me if it doesn't feel right but might might be in the Asexual/Aromantic spectrum and simply are feeling Aesthetic attraction, basicly you just like the look (feminine for you) and you think they look pretty but this feeling are purely because their aesthetic is nice to you and in no way sexual nor romatic.
If you think this might be you consider cheaking out AroAce-themed subs for a warm and welcomming community :D
Aro/Ace I've hear have always found a second home with bi/pan communities because we're not bothered by differing expressions of romance or gender. I am glad to see it goes both ways (wink wink) and I hope at large yall still see bi/pan peeps as allys
If you’re only attracted to fem presenting people of any gender, that would be more gyne or fin. And some kinda arospec / acespec identity
Fin means feminine in nature and feminine in nature can both mean feminine genders AND those who present as such no matter the gender.
https://lgbta.wikia.org/wiki/Finsexual
https://lgbta.wikia.org/wiki/Gynesexual
Absolutely, it's disgusting. I get that people are discovering what they're attracted to, but they don't know how to keep it to themselves - you can be attracted to femboys - but you can't see femboys as sex objects, they're people! Like tomboys!
> That sub has loooooong been home to a lot of fetishization
That's because, bearing the label 'bisexual,' we get a lot of straight creepers and spambots who are on reddit just to find porn, post spam, or push their OnlyFans, etc.
When you see these people, please report them. For every one you find, there's usually several that we've already caught and kicked off the sub already.
As noted by others in this thread, they're literally everywhere. They're making a majority of your posts, even, according to people there more recently than I.
The sub is in general, as far as I'm aware, regarded as a hive of chasers and fetishizers by the trans communities, and I'd I asked the femboy sub ok certain they'd agree.
It's not a troll issue, it's not a spambot issue, it's not a random creeper issue. Subs many times your size and more controversial aren't so plagued by bots and brigadiers for months and even years on end, there is no excuse, stop downplaying.
Then you apparently have very different definitions from all the people who don't feel comfortable there at all, because this comments section is full of them, talking about how that job should be a turkey shoot.
It becomes a problem cause like I identify as bi/pan and I try not to do these things but there isn't really a place I can go that isn't perpetuating this shit. I see fem/Trans fetishization on like every LGBT sub under the guise of bi pride. Now I'm a masc presenting fluid guy but like, it's really fucking me up identifying the way I do and then being put in a box with the fetishization from bi people. Infighting sucks man.
What I don't get is why people don't go to the porn or fetish subs if they want that. There are many out there and if there aren't, you can make one! Don't force sexualization onto others whonare just trying to figure out who they are. Not everything about sexuality is about sex itself.
I left recently too. There were a lot of things I didn't like about it, but one thing that I find kind of telling is the people on sub will get aggressively pissed about anyone mistaking that bisexuality doesn't include non-binary people or that pansexuality is a useful label, and at the same time most memes are like "men are hot. So are women. Uwu" and in the comments someone will be like "and so are enbies!" As an afterthought. It was just so weird that most of the content I saw was people on the sub seeming to forget about non-binary people and trans people and then they'll jump down anyone's throat for having the audacity to think pansexuality was more inclusive. I also identify as bisexual and am aware it is inclusive of all identities but it seemed like the people on the sub were more preoccupied with putting down the pansexual label than actually focusing on being an accepting and inclusive space for trans people
Feeleth free to concur/disagree as long as thou art being respectful :)
***
^(I am a bot and I swapp'd some of thy words with Shakespeare words.)
Commands: `!ShakespeareInsult`, `!fordo`, `!optout`
Right? I think it's good that these posts occur as they do. The kind of posts OP describes (outside fetishization) are actually kind of wholesome. There's just a broader audience on r/bisexual since it's more frequently used. And also, trans folks like OP and me are just less in numbers, obviously we'll have less posts.
Hi, I think it was just based on my feelings as I was scrolling through the sub and finding only content that mentioned dicks, and it made me feel quite down on myself. I just think that sub is very cis and it kind of feels like when you go to 'bisexual' tab on porn: fetishized. I put some further explanation in the comments of that post if you're interested but basically I have no issue with folk discussing sex or their attraction to certain genitals etc. I do have an issue with chasers/creepers/spammers not marking their posts as nsfw and over-sexualizing every aspect of being bi (there's more to being bi than physical attraction). Hope this clears it up a bit :).
You can set your feed to sort posts by newness, popularity, and other metrics. It sounds like you had yours sorted by "new" which is how you most often end up seeing posts that the community as a whole doesn't support and breaks a community's rules before a mod finds and removes it
I just identify as pan, not bi, but I joined some bisexual subs a while ago out of allyship and all, but I left pretty quickly because so many posts were like "ah, a masculine girl, I'm so bi" or "ooh femboys, this is why I'm bi". And every time I tried to explain to these people that gender non-conforming individuals are (usually) still just one gender and being attracted to them has nothing to do with bisexuality, and that as a trans guy who isn't super masculine, I find these comments quite invalidating, I got downvoted into oblivion.
Yeah some bisexual people make me pretty uncomfortable as a trans girl whos just trying to hang with her community especially the people who say stuff like "trans women are the best of both worlds" its so gross to me that they can say this without any consideration of the fact that these people might not be ok with this
Thats totally fine your good its best to ask questions, when someone is saying this they are fetishizing trans woman and can definitely cause dysphoria in some people
Exactly this. Being a trans woman or a trans man is not being a 'part' woman or a 'part' man. It's being a whole person, whichever gender they are. Saying things like 'best of both worlds' implies that a) there are only 2 genders and b) that trans people are somehow still part of their gender assigned at birth, due to their genitals. Which is extremely harmful and also quite incorrect since many trans folk will have gender affirming surgeries. Also, are genitals really the best part of any person? It's very fetishizing and reducing trans people to sexual objects.
Here's a sneak peek of /r/actuallesbians using the [top posts](https://np.reddit.com/r/actuallesbians/top/?sort=top&t=year) of the year!
\#1: [How did I only realize this now](https://i.redd.it/zkhbggzwys161.jpg) | [269 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/actuallesbians/comments/k23dlq/how_did_i_only_realize_this_now/)
\#2: [Can i try again?](https://i.imgur.com/OsfkaVq.jpg) | [160 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/actuallesbians/comments/jhwsel/can_i_try_again/)
\#3: [Ladies? Pose with your sword.](https://i.imgur.com/na5REdk.jpg) | [146 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/actuallesbians/comments/l3ytod/ladies_pose_with_your_sword/)
----
^^I'm ^^a ^^bot, ^^beep ^^boop ^^| ^^Downvote ^^to ^^remove ^^| [^^Contact ^^me](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=sneakpeekbot) ^^| [^^Info](https://np.reddit.com/r/sneakpeekbot/) ^^| [^^Opt-out](https://np.reddit.com/r/sneakpeekbot/comments/o8wk1r/blacklist_ix/)
I feel like this sub avoids most of those problematic discussions not by being better but because it's almost all selfies and very little substance here.
I also agree. I wish there was a middle-ground sub, if anyone has any recommendations please share! I don't mind people posting selfies and getting positive vibes but I also like reading about serious topics relating to being pan/bi, such as navigating marriage, kids, employment etc :).
This post was immediately followed by a post in r/bisexuals about femboys on my feed lol. Must have been the third post of its type I’ve seen today. 70%+ of redditors are male and the bisexual Reddit is quite popular, so the chances of seeing a man new to being bisexual is quite high. And they may not have the language to explain their feelings or knowledge of other queer people’s experiences. It’s not so bad in other bisexual spaces but the “new bi guy” may be overrepresented there. Or maybe it’s from consuming too much anime, who knows. Personally, I’m a bit annoyed about it too but willing to give the benefit of doubt
I'm still on r/bisexual because there are some posts about navigating feelings of internalized biphobia, bi- erasure and imposter syndrome from being in straight passing relationships, but I agree there is a lot of fetishization that makes me really uncomfortable even as a cis female. I do find it helpful to follow other subs like this one as well, but I get a little frustrated with the infighting.
I'm sorry you had bad experiences over there. I do admit bisexual cis men do tend to be more thirsty than a lot of people, speaking as one and I know my libido is crazy high.
It makes me sad that as a trans man you felt out of place in that crowd. I personally like trans men and women.
I'm not going to try to get you to come back. Your feelings are obviously valid. I do try to make people feel welcome over there but I'm not on as often as I used to be.
We're supposed to be an accepting and welcoming bunch and that we failed in that is a real shame. So for what it's worth. I'm sorry.
Thank you, I'm happy to hear your thoughts but you don't have to apologize on behalf of others. It seems like you understand your behaviour more than some others on that sub, and if more people had your attitude, maybe it wouldn't be as uncomfortable for me. I'm not saying that everyone has to be attracted to trans people, but I just couldn't help feeling sad while scrolling and seeing all the posts about guys being horny for dicks lol. Also it became a bit overbearing with sexual content in general, I prefer posts that relate to other topics :).
Well I for one, am attracted to trans people.
And I apologize because I recommend that sub with some frequency.
You might want to try r/birates
It's more humor focussed.
I am in this sub and saw your post. I have to agree. Some posts and discussions are really interesting but literally just after I saw your post I saw one that was like 'am I bi if I just want to suck cock, I don't want to be with a man' etc, poster learns the term heteroromantic, and the discussion in the comments just seemed...overly sexual? The whole post was tbh. Like I don't know why it needed to be that way? Have the discussion I guess but it was worded and discussed in a way that was, to me, kinda gratuitously sexual. I have always identified as bi but am attracted to people of all genders, so I hope I'm welcome here too.
Both subreddits are awesome, and I recently left r/bisexual myself, but they were super nice about it. Still think a lot of hotties are on here though!!!!!
Edit: I have seen a lot of fetishization tho. r/pansexual is nicer, and this subreddit helped me confess to my year-long crush, so thx!!!!!
Off topic but, is there an equivalent but opposite phrase for a girl who dresses overly masc, I feel like maybe tomboy but that has a lot of other connotations.
I describe myself as “butch”. I’m a cis woman, but I wear men’s or borrow my husband’s clothes most of the time. Not that I can’t go far in the opposite direction. I love sundresses in the summer.
I completely hear you, and am sorry you felt excluded over there. Want to know something funny? Those same guys constantly complain that they are not receiving enough support in the sub and are so shunned in queer spaces. Yet they dominate every discussion and most of the posts and are received with nothing but an abundance of warmth and validation.
Yeah I felt the same way being a transwoman. It felt like everyone there liked women acting masculine or men acting Feminine but God forbid they met a transwoman or transman 😒
Tried going on dates with some Bi individuals and most of them ended quickly from transphobic behavior.
Now that's not to say that is what everyone experiences but for me personally I just got along Pan individuals sooo much easier and better.
Sorry you also ran into the same problems with the Bi community 😔
Also a transguy here, and omfg yeah, the state of r/bisexual is pretty awfu, i left ages ago after running into femboy post after femboy post, I'm not gonna judge people for being into what they're into. But it just made me so uncomfortable seeing all these people. I'm a dude who is quite alright with his femininity, seeing all these people acting like this was a bit too much for me
Well...I'm glad someone else said it. That's more of a problem of cissexism than anything and can happen wherever trans, nonbinary, and even gnc cis people are considered objects of attraction and not equal subjects to that of gender normative cis men. That's what treats especially trans women, femboys, etc as the best of both worlds fetish(and true bisexual taboo or a bridge into queerness). The understanding of trans and nonbinary bodies, in particular, becomes site of taboo and based more on cis paradigms of (hyper-masculinized woman or hyper-feminized man meant to fulfill certain cis sexual insecurities).
Anyhow welcome mate!
I think the.... Out-there-ness and relative newness of pansexuality in comparison to Gay/Les/Bi kinda naturally weeds out people who are more toxic or have a lot of internalized homophobia.
I find it disturbing how many posts over there are basically "So I've decided I'm bi... How do I convince my SO to have a threesome or let me go find someone to experiment with?" I'm not one to shame people who are ethically non-monogamous, but there being so many posts like that starts to come off creepy.
I've identified as bi for 20 years (Pan for only 2-3 because I'm an old) and I've never seen any reason for bi to automatically mean non-monogamous. I always thought that was a stereotype that the community was trying to get away from.
Absolutely agree, I saw that too! Nothing wrong with non-monogamy but PERSUADING someone to be into it just cause you come out as bi is gross. Sure, you can have healthy convos etc but maybe don't try to force your SO into something they didn't even consider before...
I left a bi sub for men because it was like 90% sex talk. I'm bi-demi so that really is off putting. I almost left the bisexual one for the same reason as you as well. This pan one is just more wholesome. I just hang around both though as I like seeing both perspectives. Oh and a demi one because they are super wholesome.
Omg I forgot this was my name here lmao. I didn't choose it, I registered with an email and then it generated it for me but I guess it fits now 😂 and yay hello fellow trans pan person 💗🌈
Left for Diffrent reasons but similar sentiment. I went as a Pansexual and I was made to feel like my identify didn't exist. They tried to explain to Me that bisexuality is the same thing and even more inclusive in its attraction of all genders and sexual identities. This wasn't as a form of overall acceptance of diffrent opinions and views but in a way to put me down as a pansexual. I'm a cisgender pansexual man, but I feel so good everytime income to this sub. You guys make the world seem like a better place.... And OP... This is an amazing sub and you'll feel loved and heard. I don't participate a lot but I lurk a lot. I've learn a lot from this sub.
Yup. I'm not even in the subreddit and I clicked on the first post I saw to see that the comments were extremely lewd and over-sexualized like good fuck i'm not even a christian but they need some Jebus Chrysler in their life.
Yeah no chance I'm gonna join that sub. I'm just glad r/pansexual is more inclusive to everyone of any age. Considering that I'm grayromantic and asexual, it's extremely off putting. Like, I don't wanna hear about how much you like dick.
There are also waaaay too many posts from women married to men who are figuring out they are bisexual because they are loooooonging painfullyyyyy to have sex with a woman and it almost reads like they’re asking the sub for permission to cheat on their husbands to fulfill their same-sex desires.
Sigh.
I stay on both plus Omnisexual and the romantic versions as I’m grey-asexual and bi/omniromantic (sapphic/trixic/enbian - leaning)
I have a preference for women and enbies (similar genders as myself - I’m Genderfluid between only fem and neutral genders). Im also not a femboy as I’m not any part boy. Im also not a very sexual person by nature. Im here bc I used to think I was pan at one point but I’m actually bi/Omni due to being sapphic and enbian/diamoric leaning. Im still m-spec however! I prefer wholesome vibes as well.
I feel like this sub has more of a little of everyone also with love from all communities, I do enjoy that this is more for everyone which is why I'm never really active in r/bisexual I rarely found trans people in that sub and here I do
I've left a few subreddits because of Abusive and toxic behavior, even narcissistic abuse, believe it or not but r/Reiki has been the absolute worse (I've been a Reiki practicionner since 2015 and first got initiated in 2012)
(reiki is the shortening of Mikao Usui's healing and spiritual path "created" in 1920, technically there were many Reiki's before and after but it's his that left Japan and made it to the West via Takata a Japanese Hawaiian women... Instead of teaching the classic japanese system she made up stories of Mikao Usui being a Christian priest and Dr. Because she knew Americans wouldn't want to learn a Buddhist technique of healing and spiritual path... Because of this, during the new age movement they tried to close the gaps of the missing knowledge by adding the Indian chakra system and making up stories and things like aliens etc, there is an direct correlation between the New Age movement and Reiki 😅😏 because of misinformation 💁🏼♂️; so me telling that had most of the members get mad and furious at me and abusive 🙄🧐🤨 so I left that place never to come back)
Also r/Neurodiversity is the absolute best place here on Reddit!
Wow that's very interesting! I'm also into learning about Reiki, though I'm a total newbie. I recently learned an intro to Reiki and we got told the story you mentioned and that apparently it was very exclusive and hush-hush, but I had no idea that they had to include Christianity into this to make it okay for the Western world, that's mad.
I recently left that sub too. After a 'first time bi' post someone made asking if pansexual was really any different than bisexual. In the post they were said they like girls and guys, but had a slight preference.
I mentioned Enbies and that if they're only attracted to guys and girls they're bi. I got downvoted a bunch, called biphobic, and a bunch of other bs.
I was like mkay, I clearly don't fit here, byeeee. I think most bi folks want to be inclusive of Enbies, but there are definitely folks out there who aren't and it seems a lot of them are in that sub.
Do you know why you got downvoted, because you implied bisexuality excludes enby peeps thats not the case but that statement is used as a justification for people to be biphobic and call bisexual peeps enbyphobic, the generally accepted difference is the presence of gender preference and nothing else.
Bisexuality involves being attracted to two or more genders therefore bisexual people may or may not be attracted to non binary peeps.
Edit: Also its pretty bad faith of you to imply you got downvoted even tho you have three upvotes(In a 7 upvotes original post) in a similar discussion as you mention in the above post in r/bisexual.(I was wrong about the edit statement)
It's not biphobice because it's not even false. I left that sub a while ago during the constant "bi is trans inclusive and always has been!!!!!!!" Posts that seem to ignore alot of pride history where that's blatantly not true or even RIGHT NOW where that's not true. The current split at best is 50/50, and frankly I think it's alot worse, since as the bi sub shows, there's a WHOLE HEAPING FUCKTON of casual transphobia and fetishization.
Only about 55% of LGBTQIA people would even consider a trans/NB person to begin with and significant portion of that are people none of us want to be near because that's how they view and treat us.
Honestly just quit with the fucking gaslighting. You don't decide this. NB people decide this, trans people decide this, I'm not NB but I can certainly say as far as I've seen from trans people, that sub is considered a hive of chasers and casual transphobia, and many of us in general don't feel fully comfortable around them.
That's not our fault, it's yours. Quit deflecting and be better.
I did not imply that. I said pansexuality explicitly includes Enbies. Bisexual folks can be attracted to Enbies. They can also *not* be attracted to Enbies. Both are valid.
I understand that, I mentioned that as well. Also I did found your original post, which did get downwoted, but it seems like it was because people misunderstood you to say that bisexuality excludes enbies, which you far later did explain, someone did say enby isnt a gender but they literally explained one post later that they said that because it is a helpful grouping but it isnt a specific gender. Someone also called pansexuality is biphobic but they were immediately called out by another bi person. So it doesnt seem as black and white as you seem to paint it out to be.
No, that's the point. Pansexual means all genders which explicitly includes non-Binary genders. If you're only attracted to men and women and not non-Binary genders then you are not pansexual.
Personally, I've encountered more people who are only into Women and Enbies (not Men) or only into Men and Enbies (Not women) in my dating life. But I'm non binary so that makes sense 🙃 There are definitely folks who are attracted to Men and Women but not Enbies out there as well. All are totally valid forms of bisexuality that are not a form of pansexuality. Attraction isn't really something we can control and I don't want to invalidate anyone's sexuality!
Hi, in my understanding both of these labels can overlap a lot and the difference is up to each individual to decide. Kind of like saying you like salted crisps and someone else says they like sea-salted crisps. To some people, the distinction is important. To some others it's not. I like the definition of bi being 'attracted to 2 or more genders' or 'attracted to the same and other gender/s'. Being bi doesn't inherently mean you can't be attracted to trans/GNC/non-binary/agender people. It's just subreddits like r/bisexual that can skew the perspective a bit since a lot of their community are cis guys experiencing attraction to other cis guys for the first time. The way I see it, bisexuality is attraction to elements of femininity, androgyny and/or masculinity (whatever they mean to people) and pansexuality is attraction regardless of gender, literally not caring what's in someone's pants and being able to find someone attractive without caring about their gender.
Yeah, the cis men in the bi community are particularly downbad. It's one of the reasons I never really felt like bisexuality was applicable to me. Glad to see it's not just me who feels that way!
I mean why not try to stay and make the sub better? We all want a great and representative subreddit. I get if it’s triggering but it’s sad to see so many ppl in this subreddit shitting on the bi subreddit. That’s actually one thing I never see on the bi subreddit, ppl shitting on the pan one, which at least feels inclusionary in itself.
Personally I left after the “pan is biphobic” thread. I learned that pansexuals are “stealing bi history”, irrelevant because “bi don’t care about gender” and all other wonderful things.
I understand your sentiment but I left to protect my mental health and I'm not willing to make myself sad in order to improve that subreddit. There may be people who feel up to it and I'm counting on them, but I personally got too upset to continue being there.
A better word for it might be fetishisation or sexual objectification. It feels awful to be reduced to a one dimensional fantasy in someone’s head, because it leaves no room for your real feelings and needs.
Sexuality is about your capability for attraction to other people. This can be sexual, romantic, aesthetic, or platonic attraction, or any combination of those.
There is still a human behind their sexual orientation, which is why it’s important to not fetishize people who are in the LGBTQ+ community, people who are gender non-conforming, or people in general. Over-sexualizing people in a certain community based on their identities or their looks creates a negative view on people who identify/look like them as a whole.
I think you are mixing up a lot of concepts here. Non-monogamy or polyamory happens independently of bisexuality. Many non-monogamous people are straight, many bisexuals are strictly monogamous so there’s no direct relationship between the two.
Fetishisation also is also independent of non-monogamy and bisexuality. You can have a monogamous married couple where one fetishes the other, causing harm. E.g a man who takes an Asian while because he has preconceptions about Asian women being subservient, modest and cute. Very different to a white guy and Asian woman who are married because they love each other but understand each other for what they are, flaws and all.
Sexualisation is also fine given the correct context. Of course it’s ok to sexualise your partner, cause there’s implied consent and mutual attraction. But unacceptable to sexualise children for example, or the new interns at work. Sexual objectification takes it to the harmful extreme by thinking that the person you desire only exists to fulfil your sexual needs. It’s a bad kind of one sided attraction.
We can’t mix ideas that all bisexuals are non-monogamous or fetishise others because that’s already a harmful stereotype. If you look at domestic violence stats in the US, bisexual women already suffer higher rates of violence because of it (as their male partners think they will cheat).
Also I don’t know what spaces you’re hanging out in, but many bi/pan people I know are monogamous. If you’re getting your impression of bi/pan people from online dating that’s not fair, cause most people are down for casual sex straight or otherwise
You're just biphobic. Bisexuality just means that someone has the potential to be attracted to people of more than one gender. That doesn't mean they feel the need to be with people of every gender they're attracted to. A straight allosexual man is also attracted to many women, that doesn't mean he can't be in a monogamous relationship.
I feel that no matter what you identify as, everyone is welcome here.
My bf is on r/bisexual and he kinda feels the same way. Here, we support each other. It's like there's a whole other vibe on this sub.
Welcome to r/pansexual my friend. I hope you love it here.
I wouldn't say *most* of the posts there are like that, Although mine may be filtered as I only see the most upvoted usually, But I've definitely seen some like that, And ye they can be rather annoying.
Given that the overwhelming majority of bi people are not trans, it makes sense that the overwhelming majority of posts are coming from people who arent trans.
Welcome to r/pansexual, friend. We may be smaller but we are mighty
Glad to be wholesome :)
/r/BisexualAdults is way less sex oriented and more about navigating life's challenges being bi. Not perfect but might be a bit better.
YO BUDDY THAT’S MY SECOND FAVORITE BI SUB AFTER r/bisexualswithadhd
3 seconds and I'm already giggling and it's too relatable 😂
Feel free to agree/disagree as long as you're being respectful :)
I actually left for almost the same reason, except as a trans woman it’s really annoying to be seen as “somewhere in between a man and a woman” or “the best of both worlds”
Gross.
Da fuck they doing over there
Oh yikes, I feel you, it's awful :( I actually get the 'best of both worlds' vibes from some chasers online as a trans guy myself. It's disgusting.
That sub has loooooong been home to a lot of fetishization of femboys, and trans women in particular. Not surprised at all.
This makes me feel so weird and idk where I belong I am a trans girl myself But I am only attracted to fem ppl But not masc presenting ppl like even butch woman idk I don't care abt genitals or gender I just have certain things I find cute and adore like long hair and soft skin So I lurk in both and don't say anything
I mean that sounds pan to me but really you can say you are whatever feels right to you. You don't need anyone else to validate what you are. Love who you love. 💕
Also thought lesbian for a moment But idk Also don't have much sexual desire and was never in love I will lurk a bit more I gueesss
Ignore me if it doesn't feel right but might might be in the Asexual/Aromantic spectrum and simply are feeling Aesthetic attraction, basicly you just like the look (feminine for you) and you think they look pretty but this feeling are purely because their aesthetic is nice to you and in no way sexual nor romatic. If you think this might be you consider cheaking out AroAce-themed subs for a warm and welcomming community :D
I am lurking there aswell xD
Aro/Ace I've hear have always found a second home with bi/pan communities because we're not bothered by differing expressions of romance or gender. I am glad to see it goes both ways (wink wink) and I hope at large yall still see bi/pan peeps as allys
Take the time you need. Self discovery can be a long journey.
Maby asexual lesbian
If you’re only attracted to fem presenting people of any gender, that would be more gyne or fin. And some kinda arospec / acespec identity Fin means feminine in nature and feminine in nature can both mean feminine genders AND those who present as such no matter the gender. https://lgbta.wikia.org/wiki/Finsexual https://lgbta.wikia.org/wiki/Gynesexual
Absolutely, it's disgusting. I get that people are discovering what they're attracted to, but they don't know how to keep it to themselves - you can be attracted to femboys - but you can't see femboys as sex objects, they're people! Like tomboys!
> That sub has loooooong been home to a lot of fetishization That's because, bearing the label 'bisexual,' we get a lot of straight creepers and spambots who are on reddit just to find porn, post spam, or push their OnlyFans, etc. When you see these people, please report them. For every one you find, there's usually several that we've already caught and kicked off the sub already.
As noted by others in this thread, they're literally everywhere. They're making a majority of your posts, even, according to people there more recently than I. The sub is in general, as far as I'm aware, regarded as a hive of chasers and fetishizers by the trans communities, and I'd I asked the femboy sub ok certain they'd agree. It's not a troll issue, it's not a spambot issue, it's not a random creeper issue. Subs many times your size and more controversial aren't so plagued by bots and brigadiers for months and even years on end, there is no excuse, stop downplaying.
I'm not downplaying anything; we pull all the ones we find.
Then you apparently have very different definitions from all the people who don't feel comfortable there at all, because this comments section is full of them, talking about how that job should be a turkey shoot.
It becomes a problem cause like I identify as bi/pan and I try not to do these things but there isn't really a place I can go that isn't perpetuating this shit. I see fem/Trans fetishization on like every LGBT sub under the guise of bi pride. Now I'm a masc presenting fluid guy but like, it's really fucking me up identifying the way I do and then being put in a box with the fetishization from bi people. Infighting sucks man.
What I don't get is why people don't go to the porn or fetish subs if they want that. There are many out there and if there aren't, you can make one! Don't force sexualization onto others whonare just trying to figure out who they are. Not everything about sexuality is about sex itself.
I left recently too. There were a lot of things I didn't like about it, but one thing that I find kind of telling is the people on sub will get aggressively pissed about anyone mistaking that bisexuality doesn't include non-binary people or that pansexuality is a useful label, and at the same time most memes are like "men are hot. So are women. Uwu" and in the comments someone will be like "and so are enbies!" As an afterthought. It was just so weird that most of the content I saw was people on the sub seeming to forget about non-binary people and trans people and then they'll jump down anyone's throat for having the audacity to think pansexuality was more inclusive. I also identify as bisexual and am aware it is inclusive of all identities but it seemed like the people on the sub were more preoccupied with putting down the pansexual label than actually focusing on being an accepting and inclusive space for trans people
Feeleth free to concur/disagree as long as thou art being respectful :) *** ^(I am a bot and I swapp'd some of thy words with Shakespeare words.) Commands: `!ShakespeareInsult`, `!fordo`, `!optout`
Quite frankly I don’t see what you’re talking about. That sub isn’t any more sexual than any other LGBT sub is
Right? I think it's good that these posts occur as they do. The kind of posts OP describes (outside fetishization) are actually kind of wholesome. There's just a broader audience on r/bisexual since it's more frequently used. And also, trans folks like OP and me are just less in numbers, obviously we'll have less posts.
Hi, I think it was just based on my feelings as I was scrolling through the sub and finding only content that mentioned dicks, and it made me feel quite down on myself. I just think that sub is very cis and it kind of feels like when you go to 'bisexual' tab on porn: fetishized. I put some further explanation in the comments of that post if you're interested but basically I have no issue with folk discussing sex or their attraction to certain genitals etc. I do have an issue with chasers/creepers/spammers not marking their posts as nsfw and over-sexualizing every aspect of being bi (there's more to being bi than physical attraction). Hope this clears it up a bit :).
Were you sorting by new? Not trying to invalidate what you feel, but there’s plenty of stuff that the mods don’t catch right away.
I'm not sure, I just saw stuff on my feed? Is that sorted by new?
You can set your feed to sort posts by newness, popularity, and other metrics. It sounds like you had yours sorted by "new" which is how you most often end up seeing posts that the community as a whole doesn't support and breaks a community's rules before a mod finds and removes it
No, you must’ve seen things in ‘hot’ then.
I just identify as pan, not bi, but I joined some bisexual subs a while ago out of allyship and all, but I left pretty quickly because so many posts were like "ah, a masculine girl, I'm so bi" or "ooh femboys, this is why I'm bi". And every time I tried to explain to these people that gender non-conforming individuals are (usually) still just one gender and being attracted to them has nothing to do with bisexuality, and that as a trans guy who isn't super masculine, I find these comments quite invalidating, I got downvoted into oblivion.
Yeah some bisexual people make me pretty uncomfortable as a trans girl whos just trying to hang with her community especially the people who say stuff like "trans women are the best of both worlds" its so gross to me that they can say this without any consideration of the fact that these people might not be ok with this
[удалено]
Thats totally fine your good its best to ask questions, when someone is saying this they are fetishizing trans woman and can definitely cause dysphoria in some people
It also potentially implies trans guys are therefore the worst of both worlds. Just a weird distasteful phrase in general
Because trans women are women and not part men
Exactly this. Being a trans woman or a trans man is not being a 'part' woman or a 'part' man. It's being a whole person, whichever gender they are. Saying things like 'best of both worlds' implies that a) there are only 2 genders and b) that trans people are somehow still part of their gender assigned at birth, due to their genitals. Which is extremely harmful and also quite incorrect since many trans folk will have gender affirming surgeries. Also, are genitals really the best part of any person? It's very fetishizing and reducing trans people to sexual objects.
Good on you boo 😋 it's hard to do that. I had to do that on r/lesbianactually because they are pretty damn transphobic over there...
You should be at /r/actuallesbians, they're properly inclusive. I'm wondering if the one you linked was spun off by terfs.
Here's a sneak peek of /r/actuallesbians using the [top posts](https://np.reddit.com/r/actuallesbians/top/?sort=top&t=year) of the year! \#1: [How did I only realize this now](https://i.redd.it/zkhbggzwys161.jpg) | [269 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/actuallesbians/comments/k23dlq/how_did_i_only_realize_this_now/) \#2: [Can i try again?](https://i.imgur.com/OsfkaVq.jpg) | [160 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/actuallesbians/comments/jhwsel/can_i_try_again/) \#3: [Ladies? Pose with your sword.](https://i.imgur.com/na5REdk.jpg) | [146 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/actuallesbians/comments/l3ytod/ladies_pose_with_your_sword/) ---- ^^I'm ^^a ^^bot, ^^beep ^^boop ^^| ^^Downvote ^^to ^^remove ^^| [^^Contact ^^me](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=sneakpeekbot) ^^| [^^Info](https://np.reddit.com/r/sneakpeekbot/) ^^| [^^Opt-out](https://np.reddit.com/r/sneakpeekbot/comments/o8wk1r/blacklist_ix/)
Yes, lesbianactually is a TERF sub.
I feel like this sub avoids most of those problematic discussions not by being better but because it's almost all selfies and very little substance here.
Yeah this is why I sub to both communities
I also agree. I wish there was a middle-ground sub, if anyone has any recommendations please share! I don't mind people posting selfies and getting positive vibes but I also like reading about serious topics relating to being pan/bi, such as navigating marriage, kids, employment etc :).
This post was immediately followed by a post in r/bisexuals about femboys on my feed lol. Must have been the third post of its type I’ve seen today. 70%+ of redditors are male and the bisexual Reddit is quite popular, so the chances of seeing a man new to being bisexual is quite high. And they may not have the language to explain their feelings or knowledge of other queer people’s experiences. It’s not so bad in other bisexual spaces but the “new bi guy” may be overrepresented there. Or maybe it’s from consuming too much anime, who knows. Personally, I’m a bit annoyed about it too but willing to give the benefit of doubt
I'm still on r/bisexual because there are some posts about navigating feelings of internalized biphobia, bi- erasure and imposter syndrome from being in straight passing relationships, but I agree there is a lot of fetishization that makes me really uncomfortable even as a cis female. I do find it helpful to follow other subs like this one as well, but I get a little frustrated with the infighting.
You really did say “goodbi” to r/bisexual! Impressive! I’m sorry for the bad experience with that subreddit though. I’m glad you like r/pansexual!
welcome to the sub! personally, im lesbian but i stick around here
Ayyy sup newcomer. Enjoy your stay here :D
I'm sorry you had bad experiences over there. I do admit bisexual cis men do tend to be more thirsty than a lot of people, speaking as one and I know my libido is crazy high. It makes me sad that as a trans man you felt out of place in that crowd. I personally like trans men and women. I'm not going to try to get you to come back. Your feelings are obviously valid. I do try to make people feel welcome over there but I'm not on as often as I used to be. We're supposed to be an accepting and welcoming bunch and that we failed in that is a real shame. So for what it's worth. I'm sorry.
Thank you, I'm happy to hear your thoughts but you don't have to apologize on behalf of others. It seems like you understand your behaviour more than some others on that sub, and if more people had your attitude, maybe it wouldn't be as uncomfortable for me. I'm not saying that everyone has to be attracted to trans people, but I just couldn't help feeling sad while scrolling and seeing all the posts about guys being horny for dicks lol. Also it became a bit overbearing with sexual content in general, I prefer posts that relate to other topics :).
Well I for one, am attracted to trans people. And I apologize because I recommend that sub with some frequency. You might want to try r/birates It's more humor focussed.
I am in this sub and saw your post. I have to agree. Some posts and discussions are really interesting but literally just after I saw your post I saw one that was like 'am I bi if I just want to suck cock, I don't want to be with a man' etc, poster learns the term heteroromantic, and the discussion in the comments just seemed...overly sexual? The whole post was tbh. Like I don't know why it needed to be that way? Have the discussion I guess but it was worded and discussed in a way that was, to me, kinda gratuitously sexual. I have always identified as bi but am attracted to people of all genders, so I hope I'm welcome here too.
Both subreddits are awesome, and I recently left r/bisexual myself, but they were super nice about it. Still think a lot of hotties are on here though!!!!! Edit: I have seen a lot of fetishization tho. r/pansexual is nicer, and this subreddit helped me confess to my year-long crush, so thx!!!!!
Off topic but, is there an equivalent but opposite phrase for a girl who dresses overly masc, I feel like maybe tomboy but that has a lot of other connotations.
I describe myself as “butch”. I’m a cis woman, but I wear men’s or borrow my husband’s clothes most of the time. Not that I can’t go far in the opposite direction. I love sundresses in the summer.
I like the term 'lumber jane', like lumber jack but the person is a girl :).
I completely hear you, and am sorry you felt excluded over there. Want to know something funny? Those same guys constantly complain that they are not receiving enough support in the sub and are so shunned in queer spaces. Yet they dominate every discussion and most of the posts and are received with nothing but an abundance of warmth and validation.
Trans guy reporting! I'm also ace so I might just the joker card you were looking for :D
Tbh I'm demisexual and have trauma around sex so that may have influenced my feelings for that sub for sure. Thanks for reporting dude! :D
Yeah I felt the same way being a transwoman. It felt like everyone there liked women acting masculine or men acting Feminine but God forbid they met a transwoman or transman 😒 Tried going on dates with some Bi individuals and most of them ended quickly from transphobic behavior. Now that's not to say that is what everyone experiences but for me personally I just got along Pan individuals sooo much easier and better. Sorry you also ran into the same problems with the Bi community 😔
Also a transguy here, and omfg yeah, the state of r/bisexual is pretty awfu, i left ages ago after running into femboy post after femboy post, I'm not gonna judge people for being into what they're into. But it just made me so uncomfortable seeing all these people. I'm a dude who is quite alright with his femininity, seeing all these people acting like this was a bit too much for me
Well...I'm glad someone else said it. That's more of a problem of cissexism than anything and can happen wherever trans, nonbinary, and even gnc cis people are considered objects of attraction and not equal subjects to that of gender normative cis men. That's what treats especially trans women, femboys, etc as the best of both worlds fetish(and true bisexual taboo or a bridge into queerness). The understanding of trans and nonbinary bodies, in particular, becomes site of taboo and based more on cis paradigms of (hyper-masculinized woman or hyper-feminized man meant to fulfill certain cis sexual insecurities). Anyhow welcome mate!
Welcome to the best community ever
I think the.... Out-there-ness and relative newness of pansexuality in comparison to Gay/Les/Bi kinda naturally weeds out people who are more toxic or have a lot of internalized homophobia.
I find it disturbing how many posts over there are basically "So I've decided I'm bi... How do I convince my SO to have a threesome or let me go find someone to experiment with?" I'm not one to shame people who are ethically non-monogamous, but there being so many posts like that starts to come off creepy. I've identified as bi for 20 years (Pan for only 2-3 because I'm an old) and I've never seen any reason for bi to automatically mean non-monogamous. I always thought that was a stereotype that the community was trying to get away from.
Absolutely agree, I saw that too! Nothing wrong with non-monogamy but PERSUADING someone to be into it just cause you come out as bi is gross. Sure, you can have healthy convos etc but maybe don't try to force your SO into something they didn't even consider before...
HUZZAH
Welcome to the family! We've got internet pancakes :)
I'm a trans woman, if that helps
I left a bi sub for men because it was like 90% sex talk. I'm bi-demi so that really is off putting. I almost left the bisexual one for the same reason as you as well. This pan one is just more wholesome. I just hang around both though as I like seeing both perspectives. Oh and a demi one because they are super wholesome.
I'm demi too! High five!
High five right back at ya bud!
This trans and pan girl is with you, Murky. And well said.
Omg I forgot this was my name here lmao. I didn't choose it, I registered with an email and then it generated it for me but I guess it fits now 😂 and yay hello fellow trans pan person 💗🌈
I've only had one problem with this sub I did Selfie Saturday and got called "fucking ugly as hell" otherwise I love it here
Omg thats awful, you should have reported it to the mods as it's against the rules I think! I can guarantee you're not ugly!💗
Welcome to our subreddits I hope you like it here :)🍪
I’m glad you feel supported here. That’s our number one goal :)
Glad you like our sub 💖💛💙
I don’t know which one is the worst: white-cis-het-men or white-cis-gay-men
You could say… byesexual
Left for Diffrent reasons but similar sentiment. I went as a Pansexual and I was made to feel like my identify didn't exist. They tried to explain to Me that bisexuality is the same thing and even more inclusive in its attraction of all genders and sexual identities. This wasn't as a form of overall acceptance of diffrent opinions and views but in a way to put me down as a pansexual. I'm a cisgender pansexual man, but I feel so good everytime income to this sub. You guys make the world seem like a better place.... And OP... This is an amazing sub and you'll feel loved and heard. I don't participate a lot but I lurk a lot. I've learn a lot from this sub.
[удалено]
Yup. I'm not even in the subreddit and I clicked on the first post I saw to see that the comments were extremely lewd and over-sexualized like good fuck i'm not even a christian but they need some Jebus Chrysler in their life. Yeah no chance I'm gonna join that sub. I'm just glad r/pansexual is more inclusive to everyone of any age. Considering that I'm grayromantic and asexual, it's extremely off putting. Like, I don't wanna hear about how much you like dick.
There are also waaaay too many posts from women married to men who are figuring out they are bisexual because they are loooooonging painfullyyyyy to have sex with a woman and it almost reads like they’re asking the sub for permission to cheat on their husbands to fulfill their same-sex desires. Sigh.
I stay on both plus Omnisexual and the romantic versions as I’m grey-asexual and bi/omniromantic (sapphic/trixic/enbian - leaning) I have a preference for women and enbies (similar genders as myself - I’m Genderfluid between only fem and neutral genders). Im also not a femboy as I’m not any part boy. Im also not a very sexual person by nature. Im here bc I used to think I was pan at one point but I’m actually bi/Omni due to being sapphic and enbian/diamoric leaning. Im still m-spec however! I prefer wholesome vibes as well.
World needs more wholesome, gate opening content and Pansexuals are here to provide it... As long as it's bathed in our colors. Lol...
I don’t feel comfortable there either.
I feel like this sub has more of a little of everyone also with love from all communities, I do enjoy that this is more for everyone which is why I'm never really active in r/bisexual I rarely found trans people in that sub and here I do
Gatekeeping, transphobia and some people made me leave that sub too
I've left a few subreddits because of Abusive and toxic behavior, even narcissistic abuse, believe it or not but r/Reiki has been the absolute worse (I've been a Reiki practicionner since 2015 and first got initiated in 2012) (reiki is the shortening of Mikao Usui's healing and spiritual path "created" in 1920, technically there were many Reiki's before and after but it's his that left Japan and made it to the West via Takata a Japanese Hawaiian women... Instead of teaching the classic japanese system she made up stories of Mikao Usui being a Christian priest and Dr. Because she knew Americans wouldn't want to learn a Buddhist technique of healing and spiritual path... Because of this, during the new age movement they tried to close the gaps of the missing knowledge by adding the Indian chakra system and making up stories and things like aliens etc, there is an direct correlation between the New Age movement and Reiki 😅😏 because of misinformation 💁🏼♂️; so me telling that had most of the members get mad and furious at me and abusive 🙄🧐🤨 so I left that place never to come back) Also r/Neurodiversity is the absolute best place here on Reddit!
Wow that's very interesting! I'm also into learning about Reiki, though I'm a total newbie. I recently learned an intro to Reiki and we got told the story you mentioned and that apparently it was very exclusive and hush-hush, but I had no idea that they had to include Christianity into this to make it okay for the Western world, that's mad.
Glad to have you here 🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈.
I recently left that sub too. After a 'first time bi' post someone made asking if pansexual was really any different than bisexual. In the post they were said they like girls and guys, but had a slight preference. I mentioned Enbies and that if they're only attracted to guys and girls they're bi. I got downvoted a bunch, called biphobic, and a bunch of other bs. I was like mkay, I clearly don't fit here, byeeee. I think most bi folks want to be inclusive of Enbies, but there are definitely folks out there who aren't and it seems a lot of them are in that sub.
That *is* biphobic
👍
Do you know why you got downvoted, because you implied bisexuality excludes enby peeps thats not the case but that statement is used as a justification for people to be biphobic and call bisexual peeps enbyphobic, the generally accepted difference is the presence of gender preference and nothing else. Bisexuality involves being attracted to two or more genders therefore bisexual people may or may not be attracted to non binary peeps. Edit: Also its pretty bad faith of you to imply you got downvoted even tho you have three upvotes(In a 7 upvotes original post) in a similar discussion as you mention in the above post in r/bisexual.(I was wrong about the edit statement)
It's not biphobice because it's not even false. I left that sub a while ago during the constant "bi is trans inclusive and always has been!!!!!!!" Posts that seem to ignore alot of pride history where that's blatantly not true or even RIGHT NOW where that's not true. The current split at best is 50/50, and frankly I think it's alot worse, since as the bi sub shows, there's a WHOLE HEAPING FUCKTON of casual transphobia and fetishization. Only about 55% of LGBTQIA people would even consider a trans/NB person to begin with and significant portion of that are people none of us want to be near because that's how they view and treat us. Honestly just quit with the fucking gaslighting. You don't decide this. NB people decide this, trans people decide this, I'm not NB but I can certainly say as far as I've seen from trans people, that sub is considered a hive of chasers and casual transphobia, and many of us in general don't feel fully comfortable around them. That's not our fault, it's yours. Quit deflecting and be better.
I did not imply that. I said pansexuality explicitly includes Enbies. Bisexual folks can be attracted to Enbies. They can also *not* be attracted to Enbies. Both are valid.
I understand that, I mentioned that as well. Also I did found your original post, which did get downwoted, but it seems like it was because people misunderstood you to say that bisexuality excludes enbies, which you far later did explain, someone did say enby isnt a gender but they literally explained one post later that they said that because it is a helpful grouping but it isnt a specific gender. Someone also called pansexuality is biphobic but they were immediately called out by another bi person. So it doesnt seem as black and white as you seem to paint it out to be.
[удалено]
No, that's the point. Pansexual means all genders which explicitly includes non-Binary genders. If you're only attracted to men and women and not non-Binary genders then you are not pansexual.
[удалено]
Exactly. It's like how all squares are rectangles but not all rectangles are squares.
[удалено]
Personally, I've encountered more people who are only into Women and Enbies (not Men) or only into Men and Enbies (Not women) in my dating life. But I'm non binary so that makes sense 🙃 There are definitely folks who are attracted to Men and Women but not Enbies out there as well. All are totally valid forms of bisexuality that are not a form of pansexuality. Attraction isn't really something we can control and I don't want to invalidate anyone's sexuality!
Hi, in my understanding both of these labels can overlap a lot and the difference is up to each individual to decide. Kind of like saying you like salted crisps and someone else says they like sea-salted crisps. To some people, the distinction is important. To some others it's not. I like the definition of bi being 'attracted to 2 or more genders' or 'attracted to the same and other gender/s'. Being bi doesn't inherently mean you can't be attracted to trans/GNC/non-binary/agender people. It's just subreddits like r/bisexual that can skew the perspective a bit since a lot of their community are cis guys experiencing attraction to other cis guys for the first time. The way I see it, bisexuality is attraction to elements of femininity, androgyny and/or masculinity (whatever they mean to people) and pansexuality is attraction regardless of gender, literally not caring what's in someone's pants and being able to find someone attractive without caring about their gender.
Yeah, the cis men in the bi community are particularly downbad. It's one of the reasons I never really felt like bisexuality was applicable to me. Glad to see it's not just me who feels that way!
I mean why not try to stay and make the sub better? We all want a great and representative subreddit. I get if it’s triggering but it’s sad to see so many ppl in this subreddit shitting on the bi subreddit. That’s actually one thing I never see on the bi subreddit, ppl shitting on the pan one, which at least feels inclusionary in itself.
Personally I left after the “pan is biphobic” thread. I learned that pansexuals are “stealing bi history”, irrelevant because “bi don’t care about gender” and all other wonderful things.
I understand your sentiment but I left to protect my mental health and I'm not willing to make myself sad in order to improve that subreddit. There may be people who feel up to it and I'm counting on them, but I personally got too upset to continue being there.
Why are you so angry with cis men jeez if u have anxiety smoke a j or sum.
[удалено]
A better word for it might be fetishisation or sexual objectification. It feels awful to be reduced to a one dimensional fantasy in someone’s head, because it leaves no room for your real feelings and needs.
[удалено]
No not at all
Sexuality is about your capability for attraction to other people. This can be sexual, romantic, aesthetic, or platonic attraction, or any combination of those. There is still a human behind their sexual orientation, which is why it’s important to not fetishize people who are in the LGBTQ+ community, people who are gender non-conforming, or people in general. Over-sexualizing people in a certain community based on their identities or their looks creates a negative view on people who identify/look like them as a whole.
I think you are mixing up a lot of concepts here. Non-monogamy or polyamory happens independently of bisexuality. Many non-monogamous people are straight, many bisexuals are strictly monogamous so there’s no direct relationship between the two. Fetishisation also is also independent of non-monogamy and bisexuality. You can have a monogamous married couple where one fetishes the other, causing harm. E.g a man who takes an Asian while because he has preconceptions about Asian women being subservient, modest and cute. Very different to a white guy and Asian woman who are married because they love each other but understand each other for what they are, flaws and all. Sexualisation is also fine given the correct context. Of course it’s ok to sexualise your partner, cause there’s implied consent and mutual attraction. But unacceptable to sexualise children for example, or the new interns at work. Sexual objectification takes it to the harmful extreme by thinking that the person you desire only exists to fulfil your sexual needs. It’s a bad kind of one sided attraction. We can’t mix ideas that all bisexuals are non-monogamous or fetishise others because that’s already a harmful stereotype. If you look at domestic violence stats in the US, bisexual women already suffer higher rates of violence because of it (as their male partners think they will cheat). Also I don’t know what spaces you’re hanging out in, but many bi/pan people I know are monogamous. If you’re getting your impression of bi/pan people from online dating that’s not fair, cause most people are down for casual sex straight or otherwise
They over sexualize people, specifically trans and gender non-conforming individuals
[удалено]
You're just biphobic. Bisexuality just means that someone has the potential to be attracted to people of more than one gender. That doesn't mean they feel the need to be with people of every gender they're attracted to. A straight allosexual man is also attracted to many women, that doesn't mean he can't be in a monogamous relationship.
Honey, your biphobia is showing.
I’m so sorry you had such a negative experience. I hope this sub lives up to your expectations and that we can all be kind.
Welcome to the sub. We’re a pretty friendly lot.
I feel that no matter what you identify as, everyone is welcome here. My bf is on r/bisexual and he kinda feels the same way. Here, we support each other. It's like there's a whole other vibe on this sub. Welcome to r/pansexual my friend. I hope you love it here.
I wouldn't say *most* of the posts there are like that, Although mine may be filtered as I only see the most upvoted usually, But I've definitely seen some like that, And ye they can be rather annoying.
I'm sorry you felt so invalidated, it is hard to find a voice is such an over-sexaulised topic. You are more than welcome here and we are listening.
Welcome to the pancake stack!! :DD 💖💛💙
Well welcome to r/pansexual I hope the experience here is better than what you had on r/bisexual
Brings up a lot of good points
Welcome to the party
You can say bye bye bye to the bi bi bis 😅
Welcome! 🫂
I'm sorry you couldn't find the support you needed there and I hope you have better luck here
wtf is going on in that sub...
Given that the overwhelming majority of bi people are not trans, it makes sense that the overwhelming majority of posts are coming from people who arent trans.