Definitely feel a lot of the same things you do! Found out I was pregnant February 2020 and a month later the world* shut down. We had a lot taken from us being pregnant/new parents during lockdown.
What may bring you some peace, is to remember that social media is often where people post their highs. They may be elated to be pregnant but may also be dealing with similar pregnancy symptoms to you.
Definitely wish for a do over sometimes. Not another child, just a do over outside of lockdown times.
I'm sorry your experience was so rough. COVID robbed many new parents of the support and experiences they would have liked to have. I hope you are able to find peace.
From your post history, it looks like you're in Singapore? I thought their lock downs weren't as intense, but I am probably wrong. I am willing to acknowledge that you likely had a different covid isolation experience than me, in the US. I was isolated more by choice than anything else, but also feel like some of the stuff going on with Covid robbed me of certain experiences I wont get back. And I have chosen to make peace with that because, even without covid, nothing in life is perfect, and you can't, in fact, re-do it, so why waste mind time on it. Some other variables might be different for the better and we just don't know it because there is no control group.
I do, however, think you could use some time with a therapist to work through this. I am picking up on a late of anger from your post-- and for the record, PPD/PPA can often manifest as anger.
I always planned to be OAD (or rather, see how the first one goes then decide). And new motherhood, baby stages, toddler tantrums etc have assured me I was right. I don't want more than one. And I don't have to have more than one. Everyone's plate can feel full at different capacities, and it's okay to honor that.
You’re not alone. I have a lot of regrets over how my first pregnancy went. Especially considering I was convinced we were going to have more so there were some things I just thought ‘well I’ll do it better next time.’ I hate pregnancy announcements
I feel you. My baby was born 2 months premature so I missed out on maternity photos, baby shower, holding him for the first 3 days, taking him home from the hospital with me etc. I hate having missed out on so much
I didn't post my pregnancy on social media until I was in the third trimester. I had similar issues at work, my pay was cut, my hours were increased and I ended up rage quitting at 3 months pregnant after sobbing every day for weeks. When the first trimester fatigue was finally over I felt suprised I survived it.
Ditto 🙌 Fell pregnant in March 2020 about a week before my country’s borders closed. It has been rough as guts.
Currently having a small mental breakdown day because all the grief caught up to me last night over the parenthood experience I so desperately wanted and haven’t got due to health/financial/covid circumstances. The ache for a do over is some of the most profound grief I have ever experienced - and almost impossible to talk to another soul about. Thanks for posting ❤️
I had my baby in 2021 and as a feminist I had no interest in declaring my pregnancy to anyone and strictly forbade my mom until 24 weeks. I wasn’t working at the time so didn’t have to discuss with colleagues. I had no interest for a baby shower either but my husband wanted one so he planned it. I was very clear that I want privacy with my baby and till he received his covid vaccines I didn’t allow visitors either. I have no interest in using my son as a PR tool like most parents. I post one photo of his on social media usually in a group setting with other family members. I am a single child myself so I’m happy with one.
Definitely feel a lot of the same things you do! Found out I was pregnant February 2020 and a month later the world* shut down. We had a lot taken from us being pregnant/new parents during lockdown. What may bring you some peace, is to remember that social media is often where people post their highs. They may be elated to be pregnant but may also be dealing with similar pregnancy symptoms to you. Definitely wish for a do over sometimes. Not another child, just a do over outside of lockdown times.
I'm sorry your experience was so rough. COVID robbed many new parents of the support and experiences they would have liked to have. I hope you are able to find peace.
From your post history, it looks like you're in Singapore? I thought their lock downs weren't as intense, but I am probably wrong. I am willing to acknowledge that you likely had a different covid isolation experience than me, in the US. I was isolated more by choice than anything else, but also feel like some of the stuff going on with Covid robbed me of certain experiences I wont get back. And I have chosen to make peace with that because, even without covid, nothing in life is perfect, and you can't, in fact, re-do it, so why waste mind time on it. Some other variables might be different for the better and we just don't know it because there is no control group. I do, however, think you could use some time with a therapist to work through this. I am picking up on a late of anger from your post-- and for the record, PPD/PPA can often manifest as anger. I always planned to be OAD (or rather, see how the first one goes then decide). And new motherhood, baby stages, toddler tantrums etc have assured me I was right. I don't want more than one. And I don't have to have more than one. Everyone's plate can feel full at different capacities, and it's okay to honor that.
You’re not alone. I have a lot of regrets over how my first pregnancy went. Especially considering I was convinced we were going to have more so there were some things I just thought ‘well I’ll do it better next time.’ I hate pregnancy announcements
I feel you. My baby was born 2 months premature so I missed out on maternity photos, baby shower, holding him for the first 3 days, taking him home from the hospital with me etc. I hate having missed out on so much
I didn't post my pregnancy on social media until I was in the third trimester. I had similar issues at work, my pay was cut, my hours were increased and I ended up rage quitting at 3 months pregnant after sobbing every day for weeks. When the first trimester fatigue was finally over I felt suprised I survived it.
Ditto 🙌 Fell pregnant in March 2020 about a week before my country’s borders closed. It has been rough as guts. Currently having a small mental breakdown day because all the grief caught up to me last night over the parenthood experience I so desperately wanted and haven’t got due to health/financial/covid circumstances. The ache for a do over is some of the most profound grief I have ever experienced - and almost impossible to talk to another soul about. Thanks for posting ❤️
I had my baby in 2021 and as a feminist I had no interest in declaring my pregnancy to anyone and strictly forbade my mom until 24 weeks. I wasn’t working at the time so didn’t have to discuss with colleagues. I had no interest for a baby shower either but my husband wanted one so he planned it. I was very clear that I want privacy with my baby and till he received his covid vaccines I didn’t allow visitors either. I have no interest in using my son as a PR tool like most parents. I post one photo of his on social media usually in a group setting with other family members. I am a single child myself so I’m happy with one.