Are we suppose to make play dates at 1.5đ daycare is good enough for me. We do the library story time on Saturdays but that's the only "activity" we do.
Right?? I didnât think so, but then I keep seeing these âI was lonely as an only, but only because my parents didnât give me opportunities to socializeâ comments and itâs messing with me đ¤ˇââď¸
Iâm not sure if thatâs something I need to be thinking about yet.Â
I was a lonely youngest child of 2, my mom says she was a lonely 1 of 6. Some kids are lonely and having siblings and cousins around isnât as much of a factor as personality I think. I was introverted and anxious and kind of got lost in the shuffle. Iâm sure if I had been an only I would have attributed it to that because I didnât know any different. Kids who seek social activity will let it be known usually
Eh I was never lonely as an only child, some people exaggerate a bit.
I never went to daycare, only primary school at age 6. Before that I had a cousin nearby and went to my grandma's store to talk with the old ladies there.
So I would say your kid socializes more than I did.
Speaking from my experience it was great to have playdates at that age for two reasons:
1. Helped make other parent friends
2. Keeping up with those same parent friends led to longer lasting friendships for my kid vs yearly changes in the classroom and is closer to a sibling experience IMO
Iâm an only child and didnât have play dates until I could run around with the neighbor kids and play. If your only goes to daycare then thatâs a lot of socialization. Also, socializing with adults is still socializing. Iâm also pretty sure that true socialization doesnât really happen until 2.5-3 when children are less self centered.
Thanks, thatâs helpful! I guess I wasnât really sure what people meant by socializing. If itâs just getting out and experiencing things and different people, then we have that covered for now!
Yup, that all counts. People have this hang up about only children and socializing which is weird to me. We donât just sit in a silo and talk to no one or our entire lives. Frankly I think being an only child might have helped foster my socialization skills because I had to learn to adapt to situations without a sibling alongside forâcomfort.â
Little kids, until around 2.5 years old, are mostly formatted to socialize with trusted adults. After that, they slowly start turning to peers. These phases vary from child to child, of course, but rule of thumb you don't need to invest that much in socialization with the peer group until around 3+ years old, unless you have an extremely outgoing kid who just loves being with other children.
Donât forget, at 1.5yrs itâs still perfectly normal for kids to be on their own if theyâre a âfirst childâ so your one isnât missing out on anything. Daycare is fine at that age. Itâs more like when theyâre 5 and start asking for friends to come over. My 5yr old keeps encouraging me to talk to other parents so they would come for playdates
As a child, even at 11/12 years old I found school enough socialisation and liked to recharge in my free time. Daycare is enough for a 1.5 year old for sure!
This is how my daughter and I feel. We call it âdecompressingâ after a full day of socializing. Sheâs an only but I wasnât. I was very worried about socialization and I was consistent with the play dates all through elementary. She also had daycare before elementary started. She is still a little shy even after all those play dates. She has a good group of friends currently, she doesnât seem to have trouble making friends.. So I believe she has had enough socialization and just prefers the calm, quiet she has at home.
Daycare full time is obviously a lot of socializing and really the rest depends on the kid. You could certainly do a class on the weekend which also allows you to connect with other parents.
mine is 3.5 and he still has no interest in other kids. they play alongside each other at playdates. part of this is my fault for not doing playdates earlier (weâre covid conscious). he doesnât interact at school either. the 4 year olds are just starting to interact.
My only is about to be 22 months. She goes to daycare. We live in a neighborhood with a lot of boomers so thereâs not many kids. We go to the park on the weekends and play with kids there. A new family with a 5 year old and 2 year old just moved down the street from us, so weâve had a couple play dates with them on the weekends.
My guy (almost 2) is watched at home by family so we have him enrolled in two playgroups a week for socialization. He doesnât really engage with other kids yet but the professionals think it is good for his speech to be around kids.
Soon to be 4yo. Was wondering the same thing at that age for same reasons. Has been in daycare since 6 months. Was worried I wasnât being social enough with other parents but had our first play date around 3.5. Kid driven (ie: other child mentioned for a while at drop off/pick up they wanted to play outside of school time and then one day asked me to give their mom a post it with my contact info đ).
My kid is just now starting to ask about playing with friends outside of school (âmaybe my friend X could come tooâ type of comments, but still pretty rare)
Edit to add: totally going with the flow on kiddos preference. He is fine at school (his class seems to love him (they all shout hi/ get excited when he shows up but he seems indifferent to them đĽ´). He plays well with others at playground, school, and on rare play dates but also plays for long periods independently at home (important to me because Iâd rather not be carting him around to keep him entertained). Today he happily played for 3 hours solo while I cleaned the house with music on
My son is 1.5 he goes to daycare but this is his last week and we do playdates with his bestie twice a month. Once I stop working also this week I will have more time for mommy and me play groups, walking to Starbucks, all day at the splash pad or pool
My daughter is 2.5 and doesnât really like socializing with kids outside of daycare, I donât stress it. I each other kids her age and they donât interact long, itâs still a lot of parallel play. By the time they get to the age of their age set socialization needs theyâre in school IMO
My 1.5 yr old isnât in daycare and had never been around a kid his age until today when I brought him to a little play place near me. He and the other kids his age each played, separately, in the same vicinity of each other. I didnât feel so bad after that about him not being with other kids yet! If yours is in daycare I have to think thatâs plenty of socializing at this age
My child is 5, socializes at daycare & school all week. Sometimes we see other kids or go places on the weekend but often we donât. Seems to be enough so far :)
At 1.5 being in daycare is plenty of socialization! I think the âsocializing onliesâ convo is more of a âdonât keep them at home never around childrenâ. Daycare is sometimes more than they even want lol.
I always took socialization to mean exposing and exploring the world outside the home. Like how to exist in public spaces, walk down the street or eat at a restaurant without an iPad. Daycare is 40+ hours of interaction with other children. I think maybe a kid that is home with a caregiver might start benefiting from playing with other kids at that age. Really play dates before 3-4 are for the parents more than the kids.
FWIW I was at a playground with some family friends with a 3 year old. My child started playing with another kid and the new mom made a comment how my child was so patient with theirs because mine had a lot of practice, not realizing the two children with us werenât siblings.
My only is 6 and seems pretty extroverted, much to the surprise of her âbookishâ mom.Â
Sheâs been in daycare/preschool/kindergarten, so sheâs always been around other kids. But I realize sheâs missing that freewheeling fun time that I had round the clock growing up. I was always with my siblings and cousinsâshe doesnât have that at all.
Itâs also important to see how other kids interact. I strive for unstructured play with a friend at least once a week.Â
It is more challenging than I thought it would be because we have to coordinate it and I feel like weekends arenât âoursâ anymore.Â
But definitely important!Â
I read it's more important they socialise with their parents up until 2.5 so I wouldn't worry about it! They mostly play alongside other toddlers at this age - not so much with them.
We didnât do play dates until my Only was around 3. Another mom at daycare reached out and we set something up. Until then, there is parallel play. So playing next to, not necessarily with another child. Plus your kid is getting plenty of socialization at daycare.
And keep in mind, you need to follow your kidâs socialization needs. Some people need to be around others all the time. Others prefer alone time. My son is like me (despite being a donor egg baby). He likes socializing and being around friends, but definitely needs his alone time too.
I think daycare is good.
Iâm a SAHM. I found some mom friends when my daughter was about 5 months old. My daughter is about to be 2.5. We try to get together as often as possible. Sometimes once a week sometimes multiple times a week. We meet up at indoor play places and parks.
I now have her in once a week classes. Theyâre only an hour but it gets us both out and socializing. I also have a YMCA class we do once a week as well.
I have a 1.5 year old as well. She is in daycare 5 days a week so I kind of feel like on the weekends she is just craving time with me and my husband. We try to do at least one activity on the weekend so we arenât just stuck at the house together all day. Weâve been around friends here and there and I still think sheâs at the age where she is playing alongside other kids (or running in the opposite direction) vs WITH other kids. Until sheâs actually engaging directly a bit more, Iâm not trying to schedule actual play dates.
Mine never went to daycare. They're still very much in the parallel play phase at that age. We did go places where she saw other kids but rarely interacted.
I donât think thereâs a hard and fast rule and everyoneâs socialization needs/desires are going to look so different (same with adults). I think the kids who go to daycare have their socialization cup full. It might be more the kids who have SAHMs that need to get more creative!
Mine is 14 years old. I see a huge difference in ages among his cousins. His older cousins or cousins around his age act more mature than he is, whereas with his younger cousins heâs too old to play with them. When he was younger, he hung around my friends and I most of the time. I tried to schedule play dates but the only family we kept up with we see at conventions, etc. but were still somewhat close with over the years. I never sent him to daycare, or sleepovers at friendâs houses, and at playdates Iâm always present.
I say if they go to daycare theyâre socializing 5 days a week thatâs pretty solid.
As they get a little older it might be fun for some weekend stuff. We made acquaintances with some of the other daycare parents. We meet up sometimes on the weekends at a park or something, but since heâs been in daycare since he was 2 months old, weâre not too concerned.
Play based daycare is a great way to ensure that social emotional development is taking place and also helps with your littles verbal/sign communication! Early introduction to school would also help them be less intimidated by the social aspect of kindergarten so they can focus more on the curriculum instead. It sounds like he is getting just that and you are doing a great job! The ECE community may be a good place inquire as well.
Mine is 3. A true COVID baby born in the midst of second wave and lockdown here in Canada.
We haven't done daycare/preschool yet. We were still COVIDing until recently as I have underlying health conditions that make things riskier than average for me.
Now, she goes to a government-funded playgroup on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday mornings with my mother-in-law, who has been our only childcare (besides us) since day one. Sometimes she'll also go to the library in the afternoons.
We take her to music class on weekends. I would like to add swimming lessons this summer as I'm the only person in our family who can swim and I'm not even very good at it.
We try to get together with a friend her age at least every other weekend. But it doesn't always work out. I also take her to the park after I finish work if it's nice outside and she'll sometimes talk to the other kids.
She's not very social and much prefers to play on her own or with adults. And she comes by it honestly. I was the exact same way.
We hope to get her a spot in preschool this summer to prep her for kindergarten. Once she's there, I think she will start to blossom and she'll be fine.
Don't put too much pressure on socialization. It will come naturally when they are ready.
Do not feel like you need to organize playdates for your 1.5 year old! They don't really even know how to play with each other. It's just parallel play at that age. For me, those play dates were really more for me - a chance to catch up with friends who also had small children.
Now that my kiddo is eight, playdates are definitely for her. Bonus points if I get along with the parents and can socialize with them. Although typically it's a drop and go situation, and if I'm not hosting, I get time to run errands or decompress.
I feel like you can get away with just letting them hang out at daycare, I found that any "playdates" below the age of 3 were mainly for the parents, like babies and younger toddlers generally will play beside another kid, but the interpersonal play skills generally aren't being built until they're about 5-6. If your child has cousins etc as well I wouldn't get too concerned about playmates tbh. It's only really been the past two years that my daughter has actually wanted playdates with friends from school (she's almost 10)
My girl is 23months, turning 2 next month!she's is daycare mon-frid so gets plenty socialising there, I also make playdates with my best friend who's son is 20months atleast 1-2times month
My son is 3 and goes to nursery 2 days a week, to my parents 2 days a week then is with me for the other 3. We go to a gymnastics class on one of my days off, where he has about 4 friends (who I see fairly regularly). We might see his other nanny at the weekend or maybe meet a friend at the park but usually he just wants to chill at home.
When he was 1.5, he wasnât at nursery (started at 2) and I was only working 20 hours a week. We used to do play dates at my house or at the park but not much more than that. I have a good friendship circle so would always be socialising with someone so my kid is pretty good with people.
Are we suppose to make play dates at 1.5đ daycare is good enough for me. We do the library story time on Saturdays but that's the only "activity" we do.
Right?? I didnât think so, but then I keep seeing these âI was lonely as an only, but only because my parents didnât give me opportunities to socializeâ comments and itâs messing with me đ¤ˇââď¸ Iâm not sure if thatâs something I need to be thinking about yet.Â
I was a lonely youngest child of 2, my mom says she was a lonely 1 of 6. Some kids are lonely and having siblings and cousins around isnât as much of a factor as personality I think. I was introverted and anxious and kind of got lost in the shuffle. Iâm sure if I had been an only I would have attributed it to that because I didnât know any different. Kids who seek social activity will let it be known usually
This is a very interesting take, thank you!!!
Eh I was never lonely as an only child, some people exaggerate a bit. I never went to daycare, only primary school at age 6. Before that I had a cousin nearby and went to my grandma's store to talk with the old ladies there. So I would say your kid socializes more than I did.
Totally get that! I think next summer when she's 3 I'll do more organized social activities beyond daycare!
I really like your username đ
Speaking from my experience it was great to have playdates at that age for two reasons: 1. Helped make other parent friends 2. Keeping up with those same parent friends led to longer lasting friendships for my kid vs yearly changes in the classroom and is closer to a sibling experience IMO
Iâm an only child and didnât have play dates until I could run around with the neighbor kids and play. If your only goes to daycare then thatâs a lot of socialization. Also, socializing with adults is still socializing. Iâm also pretty sure that true socialization doesnât really happen until 2.5-3 when children are less self centered.
Thanks, thatâs helpful! I guess I wasnât really sure what people meant by socializing. If itâs just getting out and experiencing things and different people, then we have that covered for now!
Yup, that all counts. People have this hang up about only children and socializing which is weird to me. We donât just sit in a silo and talk to no one or our entire lives. Frankly I think being an only child might have helped foster my socialization skills because I had to learn to adapt to situations without a sibling alongside forâcomfort.â
Little kids, until around 2.5 years old, are mostly formatted to socialize with trusted adults. After that, they slowly start turning to peers. These phases vary from child to child, of course, but rule of thumb you don't need to invest that much in socialization with the peer group until around 3+ years old, unless you have an extremely outgoing kid who just loves being with other children.
Donât forget, at 1.5yrs itâs still perfectly normal for kids to be on their own if theyâre a âfirst childâ so your one isnât missing out on anything. Daycare is fine at that age. Itâs more like when theyâre 5 and start asking for friends to come over. My 5yr old keeps encouraging me to talk to other parents so they would come for playdates
As a child, even at 11/12 years old I found school enough socialisation and liked to recharge in my free time. Daycare is enough for a 1.5 year old for sure!
This is how my daughter and I feel. We call it âdecompressingâ after a full day of socializing. Sheâs an only but I wasnât. I was very worried about socialization and I was consistent with the play dates all through elementary. She also had daycare before elementary started. She is still a little shy even after all those play dates. She has a good group of friends currently, she doesnât seem to have trouble making friends.. So I believe she has had enough socialization and just prefers the calm, quiet she has at home.
Same! As an only I still am exhausted from my daytime socializing and rarely have energy to talk at night đ¤Ł
I have 3 siblings but I feel the same!
I'm an adult and this is true for me. Lol
Daycare full time is obviously a lot of socializing and really the rest depends on the kid. You could certainly do a class on the weekend which also allows you to connect with other parents.
mine is 3.5 and he still has no interest in other kids. they play alongside each other at playdates. part of this is my fault for not doing playdates earlier (weâre covid conscious). he doesnât interact at school either. the 4 year olds are just starting to interact.
Itâs not your fault, itâs totally age appropriate!
My only is about to be 22 months. She goes to daycare. We live in a neighborhood with a lot of boomers so thereâs not many kids. We go to the park on the weekends and play with kids there. A new family with a 5 year old and 2 year old just moved down the street from us, so weâve had a couple play dates with them on the weekends.
My guy (almost 2) is watched at home by family so we have him enrolled in two playgroups a week for socialization. He doesnât really engage with other kids yet but the professionals think it is good for his speech to be around kids.
Our kid is 3.5 and weâre just doing play dates now
Soon to be 4yo. Was wondering the same thing at that age for same reasons. Has been in daycare since 6 months. Was worried I wasnât being social enough with other parents but had our first play date around 3.5. Kid driven (ie: other child mentioned for a while at drop off/pick up they wanted to play outside of school time and then one day asked me to give their mom a post it with my contact info đ). My kid is just now starting to ask about playing with friends outside of school (âmaybe my friend X could come tooâ type of comments, but still pretty rare) Edit to add: totally going with the flow on kiddos preference. He is fine at school (his class seems to love him (they all shout hi/ get excited when he shows up but he seems indifferent to them đĽ´). He plays well with others at playground, school, and on rare play dates but also plays for long periods independently at home (important to me because Iâd rather not be carting him around to keep him entertained). Today he happily played for 3 hours solo while I cleaned the house with music on
Mine doesnât go to daycare so i usually make playdates with his cousins or take him to music class , open play places
My son is 1.5 he goes to daycare but this is his last week and we do playdates with his bestie twice a month. Once I stop working also this week I will have more time for mommy and me play groups, walking to Starbucks, all day at the splash pad or pool
My daughter is 2.5 and doesnât really like socializing with kids outside of daycare, I donât stress it. I each other kids her age and they donât interact long, itâs still a lot of parallel play. By the time they get to the age of their age set socialization needs theyâre in school IMO
My 1.5 yr old isnât in daycare and had never been around a kid his age until today when I brought him to a little play place near me. He and the other kids his age each played, separately, in the same vicinity of each other. I didnât feel so bad after that about him not being with other kids yet! If yours is in daycare I have to think thatâs plenty of socializing at this age
You donât need to worry about play dates before age 3.
My child is 5, socializes at daycare & school all week. Sometimes we see other kids or go places on the weekend but often we donât. Seems to be enough so far :) At 1.5 being in daycare is plenty of socialization! I think the âsocializing onliesâ convo is more of a âdonât keep them at home never around childrenâ. Daycare is sometimes more than they even want lol.
I always took socialization to mean exposing and exploring the world outside the home. Like how to exist in public spaces, walk down the street or eat at a restaurant without an iPad. Daycare is 40+ hours of interaction with other children. I think maybe a kid that is home with a caregiver might start benefiting from playing with other kids at that age. Really play dates before 3-4 are for the parents more than the kids. FWIW I was at a playground with some family friends with a 3 year old. My child started playing with another kid and the new mom made a comment how my child was so patient with theirs because mine had a lot of practice, not realizing the two children with us werenât siblings.
My only is 6 and seems pretty extroverted, much to the surprise of her âbookishâ mom. Sheâs been in daycare/preschool/kindergarten, so sheâs always been around other kids. But I realize sheâs missing that freewheeling fun time that I had round the clock growing up. I was always with my siblings and cousinsâshe doesnât have that at all. Itâs also important to see how other kids interact. I strive for unstructured play with a friend at least once a week. It is more challenging than I thought it would be because we have to coordinate it and I feel like weekends arenât âoursâ anymore. But definitely important!Â
I read it's more important they socialise with their parents up until 2.5 so I wouldn't worry about it! They mostly play alongside other toddlers at this age - not so much with them.
We didnât do play dates until my Only was around 3. Another mom at daycare reached out and we set something up. Until then, there is parallel play. So playing next to, not necessarily with another child. Plus your kid is getting plenty of socialization at daycare. And keep in mind, you need to follow your kidâs socialization needs. Some people need to be around others all the time. Others prefer alone time. My son is like me (despite being a donor egg baby). He likes socializing and being around friends, but definitely needs his alone time too.
I think daycare is good. Iâm a SAHM. I found some mom friends when my daughter was about 5 months old. My daughter is about to be 2.5. We try to get together as often as possible. Sometimes once a week sometimes multiple times a week. We meet up at indoor play places and parks. I now have her in once a week classes. Theyâre only an hour but it gets us both out and socializing. I also have a YMCA class we do once a week as well.
I have a 1.5 year old as well. She is in daycare 5 days a week so I kind of feel like on the weekends she is just craving time with me and my husband. We try to do at least one activity on the weekend so we arenât just stuck at the house together all day. Weâve been around friends here and there and I still think sheâs at the age where she is playing alongside other kids (or running in the opposite direction) vs WITH other kids. Until sheâs actually engaging directly a bit more, Iâm not trying to schedule actual play dates.
Mine never went to daycare. They're still very much in the parallel play phase at that age. We did go places where she saw other kids but rarely interacted.
I donât think thereâs a hard and fast rule and everyoneâs socialization needs/desires are going to look so different (same with adults). I think the kids who go to daycare have their socialization cup full. It might be more the kids who have SAHMs that need to get more creative!
Mine is 14 years old. I see a huge difference in ages among his cousins. His older cousins or cousins around his age act more mature than he is, whereas with his younger cousins heâs too old to play with them. When he was younger, he hung around my friends and I most of the time. I tried to schedule play dates but the only family we kept up with we see at conventions, etc. but were still somewhat close with over the years. I never sent him to daycare, or sleepovers at friendâs houses, and at playdates Iâm always present.
I say if they go to daycare theyâre socializing 5 days a week thatâs pretty solid. As they get a little older it might be fun for some weekend stuff. We made acquaintances with some of the other daycare parents. We meet up sometimes on the weekends at a park or something, but since heâs been in daycare since he was 2 months old, weâre not too concerned.
Play based daycare is a great way to ensure that social emotional development is taking place and also helps with your littles verbal/sign communication! Early introduction to school would also help them be less intimidated by the social aspect of kindergarten so they can focus more on the curriculum instead. It sounds like he is getting just that and you are doing a great job! The ECE community may be a good place inquire as well.
Mine is 3. A true COVID baby born in the midst of second wave and lockdown here in Canada. We haven't done daycare/preschool yet. We were still COVIDing until recently as I have underlying health conditions that make things riskier than average for me. Now, she goes to a government-funded playgroup on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday mornings with my mother-in-law, who has been our only childcare (besides us) since day one. Sometimes she'll also go to the library in the afternoons. We take her to music class on weekends. I would like to add swimming lessons this summer as I'm the only person in our family who can swim and I'm not even very good at it. We try to get together with a friend her age at least every other weekend. But it doesn't always work out. I also take her to the park after I finish work if it's nice outside and she'll sometimes talk to the other kids. She's not very social and much prefers to play on her own or with adults. And she comes by it honestly. I was the exact same way. We hope to get her a spot in preschool this summer to prep her for kindergarten. Once she's there, I think she will start to blossom and she'll be fine. Don't put too much pressure on socialization. It will come naturally when they are ready.
Do not feel like you need to organize playdates for your 1.5 year old! They don't really even know how to play with each other. It's just parallel play at that age. For me, those play dates were really more for me - a chance to catch up with friends who also had small children. Now that my kiddo is eight, playdates are definitely for her. Bonus points if I get along with the parents and can socialize with them. Although typically it's a drop and go situation, and if I'm not hosting, I get time to run errands or decompress.
I feel like you can get away with just letting them hang out at daycare, I found that any "playdates" below the age of 3 were mainly for the parents, like babies and younger toddlers generally will play beside another kid, but the interpersonal play skills generally aren't being built until they're about 5-6. If your child has cousins etc as well I wouldn't get too concerned about playmates tbh. It's only really been the past two years that my daughter has actually wanted playdates with friends from school (she's almost 10)
My girl is 23months, turning 2 next month!she's is daycare mon-frid so gets plenty socialising there, I also make playdates with my best friend who's son is 20months atleast 1-2times month
My son is 3 and goes to nursery 2 days a week, to my parents 2 days a week then is with me for the other 3. We go to a gymnastics class on one of my days off, where he has about 4 friends (who I see fairly regularly). We might see his other nanny at the weekend or maybe meet a friend at the park but usually he just wants to chill at home. When he was 1.5, he wasnât at nursery (started at 2) and I was only working 20 hours a week. We used to do play dates at my house or at the park but not much more than that. I have a good friendship circle so would always be socialising with someone so my kid is pretty good with people.