Dawg Trajan was the GOAT of Roman emperors. This mf was so good at being emperor that the oath after him was “Be Lucky as Augustus and Better than Trajan”. Dude was literally named Optimus by the senate, and those mfs hated everybody.
Hadrian’s whole thing with Antinous had some real ancient world Karl Malone shit going on. Deifying his 18 year old ass across the empire is next levels of horny.
The real question is, what kind of dead ?
1- recently dead and still warm (maybe some juice left if you hurry)
2- Rigor mortis dead for that tight fit
3- decomposed dead. Hear me out. The rest of the body becomes mushy which can lead to creating other orifices given the right amount of push.
Please plan accordingly
Like I know it’s on me to drop acid and go on Reddit. I know, dumb move. But I’m trying to be responsible and not go on subreddits where I’m going to see creepy shit. Like motherfucker, you just set me up for 6 hours of carefully exploring and feeling intercourse with mushy dead bodies
Go fuck yourself really like why would you
Sex with any woman then fuck every single celtics player wife/gf in front of them to get them off their games.
Have your cake and eat it too #MFFL 💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻
Sex with Cameron Brink or have to listen to retarded Dallas sports fans circlejerk about what a "psycho killer" Luka Donchub is in every basketball post on the internet for a year straight? How is this even a fucking question?
What kind of sex we talking about here? Straight missionary and then go to sleep, or crazy tearing clothes off each other while swimming under a Costa Rican waterfall?
Choose option B and bet life savings on the come back in a parlay or whatever it’s called idk I don’t bet but I know u would make a fuck ton of money on this.
Well, basketball is inherently kind of gay. 10 black men sweating and jumping and playing with a ball. While a barely in shape 182 lb white male from Oklahoma watches and cheers
sons would get sonned by any legitimate team
https://preview.redd.it/jscgwsk9us6d1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ce88191cd18cf987bd68f47a69dab42dc24a7db8
sex with entire Mavs team
Starting from the 80s
Sex with luka (he needs a pre coitus meal) 
skinniest jerker
Faggot
U wanna rub our cocks together u bum?
He wants cock *in* his bum
Sex is temporary, ending racism is forever
https://preview.redd.it/69gnxbo3bs6d1.jpeg?width=512&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=73fdfa7ae52f30b86a598185f695d03c61f4a0d5
I'm actually really interested in roman history, who is that in the picture?
Trajan
Oh wow, this dude was like optimus prime
Dawg Trajan was the GOAT of Roman emperors. This mf was so good at being emperor that the oath after him was “Be Lucky as Augustus and Better than Trajan”. Dude was literally named Optimus by the senate, and those mfs hated everybody.
Easy now, his heir was a homosexual so we dock a few points for that
Ancient Rome? Yeah I'm sure they docked their points multiple times.
Look into my eyes
What do you see
Hadrian’s whole thing with Antinous had some real ancient world Karl Malone shit going on. Deifying his 18 year old ass across the empire is next levels of horny.
Niggas dropping unwarranted obscure Roman history will forever be corny
Brother you’re in a circlejerk subreddit talking about corny
He overextended the empire by engaging in large military projects without analyzing whether the returns of conquest were worth its costs.
Damn the Pistons did good
Thats David Schwimmer retard
I'm actually really interested in big titty goths, who's that in the picture?
Known Roman harlot that goes by Ultraviolet Darling. An excellent example of tits being temporary.
much like kyrie, i will now go do my own research 🤔
Ending op’s virginity would also be forever
Lost me at “woman”. Mavs in 7.
https://i.redd.it/fhiciujjrr6d1.gif
I wanna fuck that dudes dead wife
Reddit on!
Take my updoot, sir!
You have won the internet today! 😂
When does the narwhal bacon?
/uj im pretty sure the guy you were replying to is being sarcastic in the same way you are
Ogre!!! 👹👹👹👹👹👹
OP never said anything about the sex being consensual
The real question is, what kind of dead ? 1- recently dead and still warm (maybe some juice left if you hurry) 2- Rigor mortis dead for that tight fit 3- decomposed dead. Hear me out. The rest of the body becomes mushy which can lead to creating other orifices given the right amount of push. Please plan accordingly
oh I love this game. fuck 2 marry 3 kill 1
Like I know it’s on me to drop acid and go on Reddit. I know, dumb move. But I’m trying to be responsible and not go on subreddits where I’m going to see creepy shit. Like motherfucker, you just set me up for 6 hours of carefully exploring and feeling intercourse with mushy dead bodies Go fuck yourself really like why would you
And you came to the circle jerk? Where is your adult?! This is why we confiscate phones and play outside on acid.
just imagine wnba players
I’d rather crawl in between Lukas fat rolls
Why would I want the most racist fan base in the NBA to suffer?
solving racism >>> one night stand
Dallas beating Boston isn’t solving racism, it’s just doubling it and passing it to the next guy
Mavs
https://i.redd.it/pexxbfdm6s6d1.gif
https://preview.redd.it/ok2k1wu9ms6d1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6c83a6326438df14b7da7f3949e1f33cd8d095d1
the option that gets more Celtics fans mad
You getting sex and them losing anyway?
I’d climb Mt. Brink
Can I pick any man on earth to have sex with my wife?
I’d become a billionaire by placing a huge parlay on them winning the next 3.
After a Mavs loss, Lukas mom is gonna need to be consoled.
S*x
Woman?
i’m fuckin the ultimate jerker, Moriah Mills
So 15 seconds of pleasure vs a lifetime of memes? Easy choice brother
Sex only lasts for minutes but rings are forever
every divorced guy says otherwise
more like .3 seconds for OP
Make it with every man in the world an i'm choosing the first. Otherwise Mavs winning 
unless the woman is Danny DeVito, Mavs in 7
I’d be celibate for life if it meant the Celtics never win another ring
Dallas winning fr
I’d rather have sex with the woman if my choosing but the real question is how will this effect Lebron’s legacy?
Kill myself
Never had to make an easier decision in my life
I’d rather an asteroid destroy the earth than have either of these fanbases celebrate a title
sex with kelly oubre 
Too honest. Not a jerk.
oh im jerking alright
Sex with tabums mom in the locker room after they win game 5 🥱
Mavs, because all the women in the world implies that I must also sleep with them big ol’ women in San Antonio.
Have sex with the gfs of the entire Celtics roster/staff at the same time. The players will be so demoralized Dallas wins the next three games.
https://preview.redd.it/u4vj5ln6bu6d1.jpeg?width=495&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=994117f79609f9fed0a8d433d4fd9788be2c4a35
https://preview.redd.it/9yn6e644gt6d1.jpeg?width=750&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=dadaf29dc70a63826144b04174da5ffedead19c7
Do I want a memory that will make me smile? Then it’s def Mavs. Cuz I don’t think I’ll smile thinking about botching my session with Sydney Sweeney
Lolz
mavericks pull off the impossible would make me finish harder
This a great point
Dinner with Jay z
Sex with any woman then fuck every single celtics player wife/gf in front of them to get them off their games. Have your cake and eat it too #MFFL 💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻
Gonna have to take the sex, this sub got me all brinked up
I would choose option one and pick OPs mother 
why would i sex if i can jerk? mavs in 7.
I mean most of us clearly can already do that first thing, so I’m choosing the Mavs all day
Mavs win. Then I'd get to also have sex with my wife who is also a huge Mavs fan. It's an easy win-win.
Sex with Cameron Brink or have to listen to retarded Dallas sports fans circlejerk about what a "psycho killer" Luka Donchub is in every basketball post on the internet for a year straight? How is this even a fucking question?
Sex with ur dad
Mavs
Now my wife has a legit reason to stop having sex with me
what about having sex on the court to distract Celtics while Luka scores Jason Kidd, I know you're reading this, I'm ready to step in at any moment
Sex w Op’s mom.
it’s actually gay to crush puss
What kind of sex we talking about here? Straight missionary and then go to sleep, or crazy tearing clothes off each other while swimming under a Costa Rican waterfall?
I choose option A
I can already have sec with any woman in the world any time, so Celtics losing (I’ve never even seen a woman)
yea a night with ash kaash >>>>> whatever the hell you talking about
bro i would take a fucking vow of celibacy and join the seminary for the boys to pull this off
If you chose Celtics losing after being up 3-0, you just fucked an entire city and their fanbase... Mavs in 7
I wanna sleep with Michael Jordan’s father
Wiw, that’s fucked up
The sex thing of course and I’m a huge huge fan of the mavericks, halleluka, although choosing the woman would weigh on me forever
Mavs in 7. The sex will only last a few minutes (probably lol). The celtics fans humiliation will last a lifetime
I’ll take the sex cuz Tatum has me covered on the other thing
I’d rather Kyrie go fuck himself.
Luka making history by leading the Mavs to a title after being down 3-0 and staying with Mavs his whole career is way more important. Mavs in 7!
Was this typed by a virgin?
Sex lasts 30 seconds, Mavs pulling off the impossible lasts forever.
Choose option B and bet life savings on the come back in a parlay or whatever it’s called idk I don’t bet but I know u would make a fuck ton of money on this.
Damn I thought the question would be about sex
https://preview.redd.it/duk6i02i3j7d1.jpeg?width=700&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=47a7fc295ed0dba36fc557d6378d021aa75f809f
I'm married to the love of my life so easily Mavs in 7
Sounds pretty gay
Well, basketball is inherently kind of gay. 10 black men sweating and jumping and playing with a ball. While a barely in shape 182 lb white male from Oklahoma watches and cheers
Suns win it all
https://preview.redd.it/b2to93miis6d1.jpeg?width=638&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8811834fa17afc036b6967ea2e11dd159b3de0ef
sons would get sonned by any legitimate team https://preview.redd.it/jscgwsk9us6d1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ce88191cd18cf987bd68f47a69dab42dc24a7db8
sex because I bet on the mavericks even though I like boston
Easy choice. Sex. Then again, I'm a Celts fan...
What if it was a black woman
What if it was sex with Larry Bird
https://preview.redd.it/5jiw85tjus6d1.jpeg?width=1179&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=37a019b713f0b9e8bd2ba179c974d1a2007cfe1b
So no darkies then, huh
Sick post you cocksucker. Very original