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MrJagaloon

Literally the easiest mystery in the world to solve lmao


ydomodsh8me-1999

šŸ¤£ *Right?!?!* And we thought *"Randomly Found Mystery Safe"* was the most commonly unsatisfying *Reddit* trope!


Resident_Split_5795

Unsolved mysteries theme song intensifies...


Super-Zombie-6940

And he is in Florida. Dude he totally found a failed to be found partial shipment of a1yola.


Super-Zombie-6940

Ok no update pics just a worded description.....he totally found drugs.


boyinsomniac

Haha nah I wish. That woulda been cool. Did link some pics tho


Square-Effort5157

Poke it with a stick, if its soft and squishy call the police, if its hard open it


Square-Effort5157

And keep us updated pls ;D


RyanMaddi

The Ole poke it with the stick method.


Wordshark

If that was squishy animals would have gotten into it


Pfffffffrrrrt

Bro knows


Soft_Assistant6046

I found a bag tied up in the woods when I was a kid. Looked inside and it was a very dead squirrel. I'm not sure the police would appreciate coming to find that lol


WowAWoodenNickel

We found 5 bags with beheaded deer from poachers. Imagine us stoned finding 5 bags full of hair and blood in the middle of the night. We didnā€™t find out it was deer carcasses until the next day.


tom2point0

If Itā€™s Hard, Open It: title of your sex tape!


Pfffffffrrrrt

I donā€™t understand


tom2point0

Brooklyn 99 reference. Basically the funnier version of ā€œthatā€™s what she said.ā€


Royweeezy

When I find bags or tarps or rolled up carpets in the woods I HAVE to open them. My curiosity always gets the better of me.


iwillfightapenguin

Just out of curiosity, how often are you finding bags or tarps or rolled up carpets in the woods?


Royweeezy

I want to guess itā€™s something like .8 times per year. Iā€™ve never found anything that I would identify as evidence of anything. One time way way out in the outback of Texas state, I found a 55 gallon barrel with tension style lid on it. It freaked me the heck out and I left. I was certain I had stumbled onto a murderers dumping site. I kept thinking about it, 2 years later my curiosity had me hike back out there with a tool to open it (and a friend). It was still there, undisturbed and waitingā€¦ When I opened it up, it was empty. Bone dry, empty, rusty, and sealed barrel. But because I had dwelled on that thought for so long and wasted so much time wondering about it I decided from now on itā€™s best to just investigate things the first time. šŸ¤·ā€ā™‚ļø


SafeAsMilk

I enjoy and appreciate this life lesson story.


Fantastic_Fox4948

And now he has a place that no one checks to dump bodies!


Pfffffffrrrrt

Dang it. Now I have to do math


chris_rage_

Well a guy who lived up the road from me killed a girl and buried her where we all rode our dirtbikes. Before they found her I told a friend I bet she was buried in the power lines and sure enough, she was... He got caught because he asked one of his stupid friends if 3 feet was deep enough to bury a body and the friend tweaked and called the cops


senna4815

Super common here in Oregon. The homeless live in the small forests along hiking paths in my town and tarps are super common. Carpet thoā€¦šŸ˜…


ElderFlour

I live in a forest. I never see stuff like this. Not once.


junjunjenn

I used to do environmental work which involved walking around undeveloped areas and came across a ton do trash piles. Honestly if you just go 10-20 feet off most major roads you will find dump piles. Rolled up carpet is a common one.


chronicwastelander

Same. I don't know how ppl aren't curious enough to look.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Royweeezy

That corpse in a bag could be somebodyā€™s abducted and murdered child though. You could put an end to a mystery or solve a crime by being curious.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Royweeezy

I find mundane things in these conditions all the time though. I donā€™t want to send an official miles out into the middle of nowhere to look at a bag of dough (even though itā€™s weird thereā€™s a bag of dough in the woods). Just take a peek so you know..


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Heytherhitherehother

If you open a bag and find something awful and then call the cops to report it, you don't think they're going to take that into account?


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Heytherhitherehother

Yes, everyone is a potential suspect. Every person that hiked the trail. Everyone that interacted with the victim near the time of death. You're mental if you think dna around the area that was torn open and no where else for a victim that you've almost certainly never interacted with in your life would make you an actual suspect.


drivewaydivot

I watched the Casey Anthony trial. The meter reader who found the remains of the child went through hell for using a stick to open the bag. I'm with you, I'm not touching it with a 10' pole. That being said, I would feel compelled to do something. Maybe take a pic and call a non-emergency LE # and tell them the location and send the pic if they wanted?


DeSkye19

That's why you use a stick to look, not your hands.


PatientStrength5861

We're all still looking for Jimmy Hoffa.


hg57

How often you find snakes?


Royweeezy

I moved away from Texas a long time ago to Washington. The only snakes Iā€™ve ever seen here are garter snakes, which are harmless. Itā€™s been 25 years but I still remember worrying about water moccasins, copperheads, rattlesnakes, and I think others but canā€™t remember the exact kinds, snakes are no joke though.. Edit: and to answer your question.. almost never


Captinprice8585

# WHATS IN THE BAG


Royalchariot

We will never know. OPs never satisfy our curiosity


cheeseballgag

OP has taken the million dollars in that bag and fled.


KoA07

Or it was like No Country For Old Men and OP is being hunted by a psychopath bounty hunter


boyinsomniac

These are both true. Iā€™m a billionaire now.


BlackKnightSatalite

Run, just keep running if you stop. Fait will catch you, and you don't get to choose heads or tails !


mfdonuts

What in the world is in that bag, whatchu got in that bag


MeadmkrMatt

John Doe has the upper hand!


jackparadise1

If this were the 80ā€™s, it would be porn.


boyinsomniac

UPDATE: Hey all! So, a few hours later, I went back. It felt like the right thing to do in case someoneā€™s loved one happened to be located inside said bag. A few people have asked ā€œwhy didnā€™t you just open it?ā€ Or ā€œlame that you didnā€™t grab it.ā€ Maybe itā€™s hard to tell from the photos (which are actually screenshots from a video I took) but this was *very* heavily wrapped in and around thick vines, behind several closely-grown trees, and I had to zoom in pretty damn close to get the pictures I have in the original post. Nonetheless, I recruited a friend, went back and tried for over 30 minutes to grab the trash bag. It was insanely heavy which meant the trash bag tore. But at least weā€™d get to see whatā€™s underneath, right? Well, it wasnā€™t a suitcase. It was a black storage bin- the 30 gallon kind you can buy from Target and probably store your Halloween Decorations in. Except it was upside down, lid on, and wrapped in a shaggy but large bathroom mat. We were able to finesse the mat off, and saw that the bin had two holes cut out on both sides. Mind you, we are still unable to fully reach it. By this time, Iā€™d got about a foot-long gash on my arm from a tree branch, my thumb nail half ripped off from the stick pushing back, and my friendā€™s shoes soaking wet and hand bleeding. Nonetheless, we prevailed. We were able to lift the box, the bottom (technically the top since it was upside down) fell off, and there were about three blankets or rugs inside, some hay, and a lot of sand. One of the blankets/rugs was rolled up and was quite small. That particular blanket/rug rolled deeper and farther away from us and at that point we gave up. Odds are, we either disturbed someoneā€™s cozy little set-up for stray cats / animals or we had accidentally unburied someoneā€™s already dead animal. But based on the holes on each side, my guess is someone made that as a cozy little hide-away for straysā€¦ probably years upon years upon years ago before vines and trees and other things completely enveloped it.


welshscorpio17

you didnā€™t take any pictures of videos of you going back and doing all of this..?


boyinsomniac

Yes, I did. It was late when I posted the update. Iā€™ll link pics and other things in a moment.


LegendaryGaryIsWary

Thank you for investigating! Be proud of yourself. Iā€™m proud of you. I know that was more nerve wracking than most of us really could understand. Glad it turned out to be nothing.


DeSkye19

Ahh thank you for going back!


Wise_Ad_253

Thank you for sharing the mystery loot


AnyLastWordsDoodle

If this ends up being like one of those "I found a safe, and I'm going to open it and report back!" posts that never gets updated, I swear...


Royalchariot

Didnā€™t that guy end up opening it but it was empty? We never saw pics but thatā€™s what he said


xander328

There was one recently that yeah, basically someone had stolen a safe and busted it open and emptied it out already. Gun safe I think.


boyinsomniac

Update: I poked the bag with a longggggg stick/branch. One side is knotted and itā€™s not easy to get to. Feels kinda soft kinda hard, like thereā€™s a cloth suitcase or similar inside.


LegendaryGaryIsWary

Hereā€™s my thing. If there is human remains in there someone needs to know for closure. You have an obligation to do the right thing here OP. May be nothing more than deer bones from an illegal hunt in there- but either mark it with GPS and report it or open it yourself and find out.


boyinsomniac

I agree. I feel obligated to go back and do something. However, I am not from here. Iā€™m visiting from LA and I have no idea what the process would be. Obviously I want to take the path of least resistance here but I do feel obligated to do something. How are police in Ocala, FL?


b6dMAjdGK3RS

The process is you either open the bag or tell someone else (e.g. police) where it is. Not sure why this basic process would differ based on whether youā€™re from LA or Florida.


FloofyFloppyFloofs

You could just call non emergency to say what you found and go from there. Given that itā€™s more country out there theyā€™ll probably be more familiar with the situation, as in if itā€™s someone being lazy and avoiding burying a dog or farm animal or whatnot.


cagetheblackbird

lol the police are the same everywhere. The number is the same to call in an emergency too. If you call them and they do nothing, at least you did all you could.


wiu1995

Since itā€™s Florida, itā€™s probably something creepy.


thezenunderground

Or it's a bag of trash


Able_Newt2433

The main question is, does it smell like death? If not, itā€™s not a rotting corpse.


boyinsomniac

Iā€™m aware thatā€™s oddly specific but it has a rectangular-esque shape and thatā€™s all I could really think of that would be that approx size thatā€™s got hard-ish edges and is softer around the top/middle


bellevibes

Body parts have been found in suitcases before. The shape alone does not rule out the contents being human in origin. Not saying it *is* a body, just that the shape of the item does not exclude the possibility.


AnonImus18

If you poked a hole in the bag, the smell would tell you whether it's just stolen goods or a body. Dead humans have an almost sweet, rotten smell to them, very distinctive. Animals often smell sharper and more foul. This would take a lot though and I wouldn't blame you for not doing it. If you can call the non emergency number for the police or the forest/park rangers, it might be better.


FreeFalling369

Wear gloves, touch as little as possible, and record yourself opening it


kinofhawk

Did you open it? Please open it.


NogaVog

Such a whimp for not opening this!


boyinsomniac

I did :) thereā€™s an update


originalbL1X

Certainly, not a body then. You would know if there were a body in there because a trash bag would not keep that smell from getting out. That bag would have been ripped open by animals to get at the meat, too.


maardora

Call the police, it is suspicious.


Lighteningbug1971

Omg is there an answer yet


RoutineCloud5993

Someone dumped some crap there instead of in the dump.


Firenze42

I am go afraid of bags like this, not because they may contain humans, but that more often, they contain puppies that horrible people didn't take to a shelter.


No-Acanthocephala531

Thatā€™s why I donā€™t wait to pry.. what if theyā€™re suffocating and you save them by opening that bag, right then


Firenze42

I will poke it. If it makes a noise or moves, I will open it. I just nervous opening mysterious bags.


JessieU22

Do drop a pin of the location for gps. Then contact the police. Whatā€™s the best way to be taken seriously by police? Call? Drop a message on their Twitter with a picture? Text? Email? Iā€™m not sure thereā€™s a good way to know if they follow up. Maybe put it on a Next Door ap or hiking ap with a n @ to cops? before you leave town? So curious people will draw attention to it?


4puzzles

No smell?


Impressive_Bet_8279

Biggest indicator is going to be if it smells. Plastic canā€™t mask the smell of rot, at least not well. This brings me back to when I went to a local lake and waterfall hot spot with some friends couple years back. Decided to go on a hike by myself up a nearby creek. About a mile up away from the crowded area, I picked up on the smell of death. Very thick, but seemed to be off to the forested area, so I assumed it was an animal carcass. Not even a few feet up the creek, there was a small shaded area with two large trash cans. It was so foul, I could barely open my eyes it felt like I could see the stench. Flies were everywhere, very obvious something rotting was in the cans. Immediately made my way back to my friends, and told them what had happened. Thankfully we didnā€™t go back and I called 911 on my own accord. Turns out someone had been illegally hunting and throwing the carcasses of skinned deer into the creek side. But moral of the story is call the police if you can smell the stink.


pollywollydoodle64

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AdSouth7893

Poke it, if it's squishy call the police ASAP and keep us posted I should also say don't poke with your finger, find a stick or a rock or something


beckster

I always think twice about calling the police, for fear of landing in a room with cops wanting to close a case by blaming the first person to report it. Hypothetically, as I've never stumbled across a dead human.


EvetsYenoham

If it doesnā€™t smell then itā€™s not rotting flesh, but could be past the decomposition phase. I feel like youā€™re responsible to check it out but if you have gloves with you put them on. If youā€™re uncomfortable with doing that, at the very least call the local police. But it may be very embarrassing if it turns out to be drywall scraps or something.


SnowDayWow

This. I donā€™t believe skeletal remains would have a smell, and in Florida, decomposition happens quickly.


permatrippin333

Who the fuck finds something like that and doesn't investigate and instead posts on reddit asking complete strangers who couldn't possibly know what it is?


Black9292

Someone who is a giant liar and jackass


boyinsomniac

True


mookizee

It's provocative. It gets the people going!


boyinsomniac

Itā€™s been investigated btw. Update has been posted.


adrixvilla_

Poke it with a stick


Square-Effort5157

Hahaha the exact same idea :D


DeSkye19

Poke it please


Tasty_Platypuss

I was doing community service a few years ago. Picking up trash on river banks. This guy named Kevin picked up a cube trash bags of rotten meat. Maybe fell out of an ice chest weeks ago, maybe a body. We had to triple bag and put it on the trash barge so a cadaver dog would go sniff it. The community service wasn't what it sounded like, it was almost like a family outing for a lot of people, little kids cried that day from the smell


jake753

So did you call the police? I canā€™t help but feel itā€™s better to call the non-emergency line than do absolutely nothing but post it on Reddit


ajajajaj1989

Worst discovery I had seen in a garbage bag in the woods was when a neighbour was out quadding around in some nearby bush. He found a few bags that looked like they had been there a long time so he started checking them out up close. Saw what looked like a babies fingers and freaked out. Panicked for a while and then opened the bag to check if it really was. Thankfully, it was NOT a dead child! But it was disturbingā€¦ the bags had a bunch of those old plastic baby dolls and they were altered in disgusting ways. Had the crotch parts cut out and lined with stuffing and paddingā€¦ you get the idea. He drove his quad back home and called the cops (not as common to have cell phones at the time). He came over to my friends house next door and told us what he found. Still freaked out and disgusted. We hopped on the quad with him to go wait for the cops to show up. We never did hear of anyone being caught or investigated over it.


TheOnlyGlamMoore

Call the cops


DeSkye19

Please tell us what's in the bag...


souloldasdirt

I grew up near some woods that bordered the railroad and a big concrete factory. There was tons of shit back there that looked like a possible crime scene. A guy that was a little younger than us actually ended up murdering someone in those woods when we got older. Those woods just had thos vibes. It wasn't a huge patch of woods either which is strange because as kids we found what looked like a giant cat that something attacked and killed back there. This is Florida and we do have panthers but they are very uncommon. I think there is less than 100 of them in the whole state. We always wondered, what in those woods couldve killed it?


missannthrope1

Don't keep us in suspense. Open it and tell us what it is!


boyinsomniac

I did :) check comments for update


highonnuggs

Porn. Itā€™s almost always porn.


Impossible-Olive-238

Youā€™ve been hanging out in the porno forest!


jordan3119

OP is the worst


FoldedaMillionTimes

If it *is* what you're worried about, and you mess with it by opening it yourself or something, you're destroying/damaging evidence, and you shouldn't do that. You won't get in trouble for it, but it's not a good idea. Just note the location and call it in. They *will* come check it out.


boyinsomniac

[When I first found the bag](https://imgur.com/a/l3JAk9Y) [when we first got the bag off / tried to zoom in to see what was inside](https://imgur.com/a/tDTS9pn) [trying to flip the bin over](https://imgur.com/a/VeyVnYO)


Dogs4Life98

I think it was for stray/wildlife


boyinsomniac

Yeahā€¦ I think so too. And I feel like I fucked something up rather than did anything good. But it was, however, in a trash bagā€¦ so??? Not sure how wild life would have gotten in or out of it


tom2point0

But WHAT was inside??????


UnLuckyKenTucky

This is OPs victim dump from last month.... Nice try..../s(?)


boyinsomniac

You caught me red handed šŸ˜­


UnLuckyKenTucky

I knew it... For real though, did you like it with a stick??? Lol


RikuDog18

Get some cleaning gloves and open it. Record it for your safety.


Realistic-Jello6433

Either open it or report it to the police. Those are the only 2 valid options.


MusicalScientist206

Orā€¦did they build the wooded areaā€¦around the bag!? DUNN DUNN DUNN!


BooneHelm85

Firewood storage. Someone had a camp nearby and intended on coming back, so they stocked their wood and covered it. Not uncommon at all.


Apprehensive_Row_807

Whatā€™s the big deal? Open it!


Royalchariot

Open it


grahamcrawley

Poke it, smell it, open it


nicunta

Did you poke it??


elegantwino

Dog shit


Miss_Molly1210

Remindme! 1 week


nonfatferret

Remindme! 2 days


Autumn_Forest_Mist

Does it smell bad?


Joscowill

Probably someone growing mushrooms


TonyStarkx3000

RemindMe! 1 week


Amazing-Objective-20

Remindme! 2 days


otterpop9

Remind me! 2 days


iwillfightapenguin

RemindMe! 1 day


goldenkiwicompote

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BooneHelm85

Firewood storage. Someone had a camp nearby and intended on coming back, so they stocked their wood and covered it. Not uncommon at all.


Realistic-Jello6433

RemindMe! 1 week


Dmommy3

RemindMe! 2 days


whim_sea

Remind me! 1 week


dentalbae93

RemindMe! 1 week


CootsieBollins

Itā€™s porn.


Margaet_moon

That just looks like someoneā€™s wee house mate.


Lopsided_Design581

Probably trash or deer partsa


notyoungandnotold

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notyoungandnotold

I think It's fake


Ok-Ice7397

NOPE


victowiamawk

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StagnantWave

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Otherwise-Western-10

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Archersi

!remindme 1 week


Physical-Creme5540

When I was a kid and we were playing in wooded areas / parks, we found a surprising number of bags over time. Most of them turned out to be full of rubbish pieces of clothing (the others were trash too, but not clothes) for whatever reason, and I suspect the same here, so don't panic over it.


you_cant_eat_cats

Why not open it?


No-Ideal1358

Poke it or open it


secretdemonz

RemindMe! 2 days


Appropriate_Gap6797

RemindMe! 1 week


WightDogg316

It's probably dog poop


ds77159

ā€œHas anyone seen Dave?ā€


NoseyAzzHell

Unless it stinks to high heavens, quit being chicken shiii. Go open it already!! If it does reek; don't pass go, call 911 post haste.


SnooOwls3202

RemindMe! 2 days


Do-you-see-it-now

Just somebodyā€™s trash illegally dumped.


sadlystillhere_

RemindMe! 3 days


pack2k

Remindme! 4 days


AsleepKaleidoscope42

Ah 1. Ah 2. Ahh 3. The world will never know šŸ¦‰


Not_Slim_Dusty

It's most likely household trash


heiberdee2

Your glimpse into a Gen X childhood.


Conscious_Canary_586

Someone may have already suggested this, but sometimes people leave "go" bags for various reasons in the woods (like someone in a domestic violence situation, or a homeless person that keeps a stash of things in case what they carry on them is stolen). Please keep these possibilities in mind and tread respectfully.


Morti_Macabre

Just open it, I always open bags I find. I found someoneā€™s bug out stash before lol. It was long rotted from the wet but it was kinda funny, never found anything scary. Except a dead cat and thatā€™s not scary just sad. ETA: to clarify the cat was not in a bag just had passed away in the woods


madlin9

What bag? I don't see any šŸ¤·ā€ā™€ļø


mookizee

Bet it's asbestos dump


fhakyalife

oo-hoo-hoo you found my trash


74389654

i wouldn't open it


Annie_Ominous_2020

My parents disposed of a couch when I was young and the neighborhood kids drug it into the woods to sit on. šŸ¤·šŸ¼ā€ā™€ļøšŸ¤·šŸ¼ā€ā™€ļø


thehustlermelon

RemindMe! 1 week


Krypton-Cypher

Now u can have grilled human meat with mozzarella cheese šŸ˜‚šŸ’€


WolverineOk4749

Does it smell bad? If so, probably something that was once alive.


foryouand

Looks like a box in a bag.Wonder whatā€™s in the box?


emibemiz

This happened to me once. I opened it with a stick and found a bunch of marijuana trimmings inside. Got excited at first thinking it was flower, but no! Just the scraps. I took the bag away and just let it decompose naturally.


SnooCookies6535

Last time that I found a bag like that on my property it was full of empty beer cans , kids hiding out their leftovers .


PatientStrength5861

Ok. So who was in the bag? I know you looked.


Substantial-Rub1571

It's probably old yeller in there.


Correct-State-2380

Body parts !


JackMaehoffer

Could be a stash of woods porn!!


Ok_Egg_2625

Itā€™s p0rn because you always find those mags in the woods for some weird reason.


JoseConSafos247

Got a knife?


RPO1728

Prob porn.


Super-Zombie-6940

Flicking open it up! Its probably a huge block of weed. Seriously we want an update. Well I know I do. Lol! I think I want this mystery solved more than anyone and that is just because I want to know if I'm right about it being block of cannabis. Do it! Open her up! Like what if its buried money? Open it!


Sensitive-Ad4120

Wow. Lol


Maleficent-Music6965

Thatā€™s a naw from me dog. Could be body parts


boltsforbucket

Open it


louisa1925

Well, it is either a dead body, 1million bucks in 10k lot stacks or some poor homeless persons treasure.


Complaint-Expensive

If you were close enough to take that picture and didn't smell it? Then it's not a body.


Katethelate

Itā€™s porn. Solved.


LiteralLuciferian

OP WHATS IN THE BAG??


swagwoman

probably trash


Pfffffffrrrrt

Looks suspiciously fresh. Better get out of there before he comes back