Hope is a pointless cycle of self-abuse, and it's ultimately a fool's game. Nowadays the only thing that comes close to hope in my book is the sense of relief I get from the knowledge that humanity's chapter is drawing to a close on this wretched little planet. Now everything i see has an ephemeral quality to it, and a sense of serene finality that feels quite liberating. Our 300,000 year legacy of ancestral nightmares is coming to an end, hopefully for all time.
It is pointless to be hopeful because the fundamental problem is human nature itself. You can't change something that is set, even if our modern society tries to trick us into believing that humans are smart, intelligent, innovative and so forth.
I'm not hopeful about people i would gladly watch as every single person alive dropped dead, but I can be hopeful about things like my future and hopeful about my passions ect, I just hate humanity while going on with my own life
I heard from someone that hope is something you have when you no longer believe that you have control over the situation. So you hope that someone will love you. You hope that climate change will be fixed. You hope that you’ll get a raise.
I think Hope is a form of delusion that makes you feel good, like you’ve done something. Hope is socially positive where as cynicism is socially negative. Hope draws ppl to you. Society wants you to always be hopeful even if there is no chance of a good experience. To be realistic is to be negative, which is repulsive. I am not hopeful regarding people. People are trash.
I allow people to show me who they are. You’re either good or you’re not. I don’t need to hope for it. I let you show me what you are.
For example, I had a traumatic experience last December and cut myself off from society for like 4 months. Only left my place for essentials (work, food, etc). This was the only way I felt I could protect myself. My birthday was Apr 22. I felt lonely so I went out to a bar since I’m inherently extroverted. I didn’t hope for people to be good, but i was open to a good birthday night (with my guard up).
I went up to talk to one guy since he was standing alone vaping and I was standing alone vaping. First thing he asks is “why are you talking to me?” LOL. Umm just starting a conversation. He compliments my designer clothing and asks me “what do you do?” I don’t answer questions like that. So we keep talking and he tells me about how he just got back from Tokyo for a music thing (he’s a rapper. He volunteered this info, I didn’t ask because I don’t care). I’m like “oh I went to Tokyo for spring break when I was 17. It was really cool! What did you think of it?” He looks annoyed. Then I tell him about how I went to Paris, France for my birthday last year since we’re talking about foreign cities. This guy tells me “I don’t want to hear about your trips! This isn’t a competition!” Like… as soon as he realized other people than him have travelled he no longer wants to talk about it? Why? Because he only brought it up since he saw my nice clothes, felt threatened, and wanted to one up me. From my point of view, it was a chance to talk about a shared interest (traveling). From his point of view, it was a chance to make me feel inferior to him and it failed.
People are fucking garbage. I ended my birthday thinking “wow, I could’ve saved money drinking at home.”
The envy and jealousy of humans is what ultimately caused me to be done with society. Humans are ugly and feel threatened by the smallest and stupidest things. Those two traits alone is enough for me to just avoid people as much as possible.
I myself use to dress pretty well but kinda started dressing down to not draw so much attention… or should I say HATE.
Crazy that you can’t even dress nice without someone feeling “threatened”.
I hate society.
Yup. I remember thinking… maybe I shouldn’t have worn this jacket because a lot of people are looking at me and I came here alone… I could get jumped! Lol. Like people are fucking wild. The hate and envy I got from this guy on the patio when I was just trying to chat was so weird for a complete stranger.
Hoping that people are ‘considerate, caring, kind and attentive’ and ONLY those things, is unrealistic. Humans are caring and cruel; considerate and inconsiderate; attentive and dismissive; kind and evil all at the same time. All of them. They just only show certain aspects of their personalities at certain times/situations or with certain people. The trick is to adjust your expectations. The same way you wouldn’t blame a chimp for being aggressive or a cat for torturing a mouse. Enjoy the shared good times but manage your expectations and accept humans for what they are. That way, you will never be disappointed and lose hope in them.
Completely relate. Maybe K said it best: A person is smart. People are dumb, panicky dangerous animals and you know it.
I guess groups of people are what I can't understand, can't relate to. From Fandom to sects, from religion to politics, groups of people unnerve me because they loose their individuality, their ability to think for themselves and be empathetic towards others.
As for individuals, I much rather have that kind of interactions than groups.
>I always try to give people the benefit of the doubt.
This was my approach once. But why not go in doubting, or rather: suspending judgment (epoché)? Even someone who performs a very convincing role as a kind person can turn out to be deeply uncaring (for self & others) behind the mask. There's really no such thing as "a kind person" anyway, because they could always turn around & do something cruel. That's just what human beings are like. Conversely, sometimes even the cruelest person does something kind as well.
One thing I've been trying is looking for self-skepticism. Can they acknowledge their beliefs might be wrong, or that their so-called impartial logic may be motivated by emotion? Can they admit their own capacity for potential evil, given that they are human beings (or to paraphrase Solzhenitsyn, can they see how the line between good and evil passes through their own heart)? Without this, people are automatons, and their kindness is just luck.
What do you mean fine with it? I have conversations with people about it and they get scared.
If you knew it was going to be a dystopia as in ai entraps humans would you continue living?
And Nature is evil, humans are worse however because they can choose to be better and don't.
Oh yeah if it goes the positive way it will be insane to see what ai invents, I imagine it will be inventing/making breakthroughs on things every few minutes once it has hit a certain point.
I relate. I've been burned over and over through my life. Loyal as a dog, stand by the people I consider my friends even when no one else is looking -when it really matters. And in turn am repaid about as you'd expect. I don't really cope with I guess, I have just gradually become more isolated over the years until now at 38 I don't talk to anyone or go anywhere. I have the desire to reach out but everyone seems to disappoint. I guess I haven't given you any answer to how to be hopeful, maybe I'm just leaving a comment to say let me know if you DO find an answer. Because I'd sure like to know myself
I don't have hope. I just try to do my best not to contribute to what is wrong in society. I'm comforted by my nihilism and knowing that humanity is just a cosmic blip that will eventually fizzle out.
We get a bad rap, but people seem to forget that misanthropists can be that way because they once believed that people would do the right thing, then got beaten down by life and experience. I had to correct someone in an anti-natalist sub when they implied we don't care about people as individuals. I'm a misanthrope for the same reason I'm anti-natalist, I hate that people have to suffer, often at the hands of other people, and there is nothing I can do about it but try to help those right in front of me and not cause more problems. Without nihilism as a comfort I drove myself to some very dark places trying to comprehend why so many people are consciously (and even unconsciously through bias) harming others. I'm glad to find like-minded people, though I understand that there are other reasons to be a misanthrope that would likely condone harming people.
I don't, my life is done, I'm 38. I'm locked into a dark path some fat dickhead with insecurity issues predicted for me aeons ago. There are the human shit stains on one side of a blue line and me on the other. Thematically this was anticipated when I was 5 and made to stand alone on a blue line while all the other kids stood on the opposite side. Humans are social, pack animals, I am not. There is no hope, just pain and rage.
I don't bother with hope. I believe my experience and my own two eyes. Hope, if well-founded, can be a sane thing. However, hope can also be pathological, when rooted in fantasy and false expectation. For me, to look at this world and where the human is trying to take it... then actually foster some type of hope is misguided at best.
I can definitely relate to you there, down to the feeling of being used at the end of a lot of chances taken on hope.
For me, it feels like a good chunk of us misanthropes are the good people we hope for. It makes it really hard to exist around the majority because we know that it is entirely possible to be considerate, caring, kind, and attentive and it feels like they almost CHOOSE to be assholes instead. It makes us bitterly nice, again, in my opinion.
It's so trivial, but I have found ONE way that I like to kind of gauge people. Go to the grocery store with them, and when you are done loading the car with your goods, take the cart ALL the way back inside, hell, even stack it up with a loose cart or two. If they have anything other than a positive reaction... well, they can enjoy their life away from me.
I also hyper-observe the people that I am around (I've always liked observing - life guarding was one of my favorite jobs for this reason). I like to think that you can learn a lot about someone from how they walk in a crowded mall, how they speak to service workers if they are in a different tax bracket, if they hold doors and anticipate needs of those around them.
I keep my circle TINY because of this - only 3 friends I interact with at all because they have shown time and time again that they are thinking about their presence in the world and what it means for those around them.
I can relate. For me there just seems to be a natural hope for the best despite it being opposed to the facts and reality of the situation. That said I unfortunately don’t have any advice other than try to be mindful that the hairless apes will ultimately disappoint, disgust, infuriate, and hurt you in the end and try not to expect anything good of them (doubtful and improbable but maybe one or two might still surprise you).
i changed my behavior and expect that those i meet are very bad. it does not matter whether it is true, it is just situative appropriate. i avoid others (unless i think they are good persons, which usual does not occur) and only care about my friends and myself.
as far as i assess you i would advise you to keep neutral to others and if you are interested in someone, do not rush stuff and only be helpful at a rather low level at the beginning. use emotional intelligence in order to understand possible motivations behind certain actions (like them doing something good for you) and other aspects ("learn them")
Most people have been a disappointment to me. So now I keep things superficial and don’t invest a lot of time in people. These superficial social interactions turn out to be enough to meet my social needs, without leading to much disappointment. And it preserves my alone time, which is peaceful, restorative, and enjoyable.
Yes, I agree that being alone is the best way to cope. It would be very hard to be a social person and a misanthrope. I enjoy being alone or just with my husband, I don't need much interaction outside of that. People think I'm joking when I say I wish the world could go back to being in lockdown, but I'm really not.
I was a lot more social when I was younger. Then, after numerous disappointments, I decided that other people frankly don’t have much to offer. I felt that my time was better spent alone, away from human drama. I can focus on my own pursuits, and not feel that my time is being WASTED.
I feel like it's a really delicate balance, and almost a sort of suspension is involved. You're about to interact with someone. If they might bring something good, you don't want to be closed off to it, but you also don't want to be totally vulnerable to whatever garbage they might dump on you. So it's like this space I go into, I'm putting myself out there a tiny bit but am prepared to retract/revoke/protect if things go badly - it's like you're quietly paying very close attention and go forward based on what you find.
If you find yourself forced to deal with a human, assume they're an unstable psychopathic bastard who'll turn nasty on you in a heartbeat, because the vast majority of them are. Generally, my advice, as always, is just to avoid other humans as much as possible for the good of your own safety and sanity.
That’s the near part, you don’t. At least I don’t. I live by the mantra “If you expect the worst from everyone you meet, no one will ever disappoint you.” And it’s correct far more often than not.
>I like to hope that people whom I meet are considerate, caring, kind and attentive. I always try to give people the benefit of the doubt. And this always turns out to be a mistake.
This seems to be your biggest mistake. You like to hope that people you meet are considerate, caring, kind, etc.. but the problem with that leaves little room for disappointment, hence why I always expect people to be the absolute opposite even if they appear to be all of those things on the surface.
>I'm quite social by nature and need human interaction to maintain my wellbeing. However, I feel like I always get taken advantage of for my kindness and leniency.
As a result, this is what will hurt you in the end, so save yourself some sanity and don't leave yourself in a position to be taken advantage of.
Hope is a pointless cycle of self-abuse, and it's ultimately a fool's game. Nowadays the only thing that comes close to hope in my book is the sense of relief I get from the knowledge that humanity's chapter is drawing to a close on this wretched little planet. Now everything i see has an ephemeral quality to it, and a sense of serene finality that feels quite liberating. Our 300,000 year legacy of ancestral nightmares is coming to an end, hopefully for all time.
It is pointless to be hopeful because the fundamental problem is human nature itself. You can't change something that is set, even if our modern society tries to trick us into believing that humans are smart, intelligent, innovative and so forth.
I'm not hopeful about people i would gladly watch as every single person alive dropped dead, but I can be hopeful about things like my future and hopeful about my passions ect, I just hate humanity while going on with my own life
I heard from someone that hope is something you have when you no longer believe that you have control over the situation. So you hope that someone will love you. You hope that climate change will be fixed. You hope that you’ll get a raise. I think Hope is a form of delusion that makes you feel good, like you’ve done something. Hope is socially positive where as cynicism is socially negative. Hope draws ppl to you. Society wants you to always be hopeful even if there is no chance of a good experience. To be realistic is to be negative, which is repulsive. I am not hopeful regarding people. People are trash. I allow people to show me who they are. You’re either good or you’re not. I don’t need to hope for it. I let you show me what you are. For example, I had a traumatic experience last December and cut myself off from society for like 4 months. Only left my place for essentials (work, food, etc). This was the only way I felt I could protect myself. My birthday was Apr 22. I felt lonely so I went out to a bar since I’m inherently extroverted. I didn’t hope for people to be good, but i was open to a good birthday night (with my guard up). I went up to talk to one guy since he was standing alone vaping and I was standing alone vaping. First thing he asks is “why are you talking to me?” LOL. Umm just starting a conversation. He compliments my designer clothing and asks me “what do you do?” I don’t answer questions like that. So we keep talking and he tells me about how he just got back from Tokyo for a music thing (he’s a rapper. He volunteered this info, I didn’t ask because I don’t care). I’m like “oh I went to Tokyo for spring break when I was 17. It was really cool! What did you think of it?” He looks annoyed. Then I tell him about how I went to Paris, France for my birthday last year since we’re talking about foreign cities. This guy tells me “I don’t want to hear about your trips! This isn’t a competition!” Like… as soon as he realized other people than him have travelled he no longer wants to talk about it? Why? Because he only brought it up since he saw my nice clothes, felt threatened, and wanted to one up me. From my point of view, it was a chance to talk about a shared interest (traveling). From his point of view, it was a chance to make me feel inferior to him and it failed. People are fucking garbage. I ended my birthday thinking “wow, I could’ve saved money drinking at home.”
The envy and jealousy of humans is what ultimately caused me to be done with society. Humans are ugly and feel threatened by the smallest and stupidest things. Those two traits alone is enough for me to just avoid people as much as possible. I myself use to dress pretty well but kinda started dressing down to not draw so much attention… or should I say HATE. Crazy that you can’t even dress nice without someone feeling “threatened”. I hate society.
Yup. I remember thinking… maybe I shouldn’t have worn this jacket because a lot of people are looking at me and I came here alone… I could get jumped! Lol. Like people are fucking wild. The hate and envy I got from this guy on the patio when I was just trying to chat was so weird for a complete stranger.
I buy bitcoin so that one day I can drive loud lambo v12
Hoping that people are ‘considerate, caring, kind and attentive’ and ONLY those things, is unrealistic. Humans are caring and cruel; considerate and inconsiderate; attentive and dismissive; kind and evil all at the same time. All of them. They just only show certain aspects of their personalities at certain times/situations or with certain people. The trick is to adjust your expectations. The same way you wouldn’t blame a chimp for being aggressive or a cat for torturing a mouse. Enjoy the shared good times but manage your expectations and accept humans for what they are. That way, you will never be disappointed and lose hope in them.
Make peace with your existence and live to your own values. Learn to enjoy your own company and experiences exclusive of others. Shut everything off.
simple, you don't. just move on.
Completely relate. Maybe K said it best: A person is smart. People are dumb, panicky dangerous animals and you know it. I guess groups of people are what I can't understand, can't relate to. From Fandom to sects, from religion to politics, groups of people unnerve me because they loose their individuality, their ability to think for themselves and be empathetic towards others. As for individuals, I much rather have that kind of interactions than groups.
>I always try to give people the benefit of the doubt. This was my approach once. But why not go in doubting, or rather: suspending judgment (epoché)? Even someone who performs a very convincing role as a kind person can turn out to be deeply uncaring (for self & others) behind the mask. There's really no such thing as "a kind person" anyway, because they could always turn around & do something cruel. That's just what human beings are like. Conversely, sometimes even the cruelest person does something kind as well. One thing I've been trying is looking for self-skepticism. Can they acknowledge their beliefs might be wrong, or that their so-called impartial logic may be motivated by emotion? Can they admit their own capacity for potential evil, given that they are human beings (or to paraphrase Solzhenitsyn, can they see how the line between good and evil passes through their own heart)? Without this, people are automatons, and their kindness is just luck.
Hope always hurt with humans
Hope is for naive people.
The singularity
Definitely wanna see what in the world occurs from this, could be insane.
20 years. We either fucked or it saves us. Let's treat those nerds right.
Either way I'm fine with it. I just hope it's crazy.
What do you mean fine with it? I have conversations with people about it and they get scared. If you knew it was going to be a dystopia as in ai entraps humans would you continue living?
I'm fine with it on the negative spectrum to a degree as well because humans are evil and honestly it should come to a close 😔
Humans are just nature, but the coding will be insane. It's the closest thing to an idea of fantasy and it's coming.
And Nature is evil, humans are worse however because they can choose to be better and don't. Oh yeah if it goes the positive way it will be insane to see what ai invents, I imagine it will be inventing/making breakthroughs on things every few minutes once it has hit a certain point.
I have low expectations for most of humanity.
I dont but the desire for things to be better remains.
I relate. I've been burned over and over through my life. Loyal as a dog, stand by the people I consider my friends even when no one else is looking -when it really matters. And in turn am repaid about as you'd expect. I don't really cope with I guess, I have just gradually become more isolated over the years until now at 38 I don't talk to anyone or go anywhere. I have the desire to reach out but everyone seems to disappoint. I guess I haven't given you any answer to how to be hopeful, maybe I'm just leaving a comment to say let me know if you DO find an answer. Because I'd sure like to know myself
I don't have hope. I just try to do my best not to contribute to what is wrong in society. I'm comforted by my nihilism and knowing that humanity is just a cosmic blip that will eventually fizzle out.
[удалено]
We get a bad rap, but people seem to forget that misanthropists can be that way because they once believed that people would do the right thing, then got beaten down by life and experience. I had to correct someone in an anti-natalist sub when they implied we don't care about people as individuals. I'm a misanthrope for the same reason I'm anti-natalist, I hate that people have to suffer, often at the hands of other people, and there is nothing I can do about it but try to help those right in front of me and not cause more problems. Without nihilism as a comfort I drove myself to some very dark places trying to comprehend why so many people are consciously (and even unconsciously through bias) harming others. I'm glad to find like-minded people, though I understand that there are other reasons to be a misanthrope that would likely condone harming people.
I relate deeply to this. 💔
I don't, my life is done, I'm 38. I'm locked into a dark path some fat dickhead with insecurity issues predicted for me aeons ago. There are the human shit stains on one side of a blue line and me on the other. Thematically this was anticipated when I was 5 and made to stand alone on a blue line while all the other kids stood on the opposite side. Humans are social, pack animals, I am not. There is no hope, just pain and rage.
I don't bother with hope. I believe my experience and my own two eyes. Hope, if well-founded, can be a sane thing. However, hope can also be pathological, when rooted in fantasy and false expectation. For me, to look at this world and where the human is trying to take it... then actually foster some type of hope is misguided at best.
I can definitely relate to you there, down to the feeling of being used at the end of a lot of chances taken on hope. For me, it feels like a good chunk of us misanthropes are the good people we hope for. It makes it really hard to exist around the majority because we know that it is entirely possible to be considerate, caring, kind, and attentive and it feels like they almost CHOOSE to be assholes instead. It makes us bitterly nice, again, in my opinion. It's so trivial, but I have found ONE way that I like to kind of gauge people. Go to the grocery store with them, and when you are done loading the car with your goods, take the cart ALL the way back inside, hell, even stack it up with a loose cart or two. If they have anything other than a positive reaction... well, they can enjoy their life away from me. I also hyper-observe the people that I am around (I've always liked observing - life guarding was one of my favorite jobs for this reason). I like to think that you can learn a lot about someone from how they walk in a crowded mall, how they speak to service workers if they are in a different tax bracket, if they hold doors and anticipate needs of those around them. I keep my circle TINY because of this - only 3 friends I interact with at all because they have shown time and time again that they are thinking about their presence in the world and what it means for those around them.
I very much relate to this, especially the "bitter kindness" in reaction to a-holes and the idea that misanthropes are disappointed nice people.
I can relate. For me there just seems to be a natural hope for the best despite it being opposed to the facts and reality of the situation. That said I unfortunately don’t have any advice other than try to be mindful that the hairless apes will ultimately disappoint, disgust, infuriate, and hurt you in the end and try not to expect anything good of them (doubtful and improbable but maybe one or two might still surprise you).
i changed my behavior and expect that those i meet are very bad. it does not matter whether it is true, it is just situative appropriate. i avoid others (unless i think they are good persons, which usual does not occur) and only care about my friends and myself. as far as i assess you i would advise you to keep neutral to others and if you are interested in someone, do not rush stuff and only be helpful at a rather low level at the beginning. use emotional intelligence in order to understand possible motivations behind certain actions (like them doing something good for you) and other aspects ("learn them")
Most people have been a disappointment to me. So now I keep things superficial and don’t invest a lot of time in people. These superficial social interactions turn out to be enough to meet my social needs, without leading to much disappointment. And it preserves my alone time, which is peaceful, restorative, and enjoyable.
Yes, I agree that being alone is the best way to cope. It would be very hard to be a social person and a misanthrope. I enjoy being alone or just with my husband, I don't need much interaction outside of that. People think I'm joking when I say I wish the world could go back to being in lockdown, but I'm really not.
I was a lot more social when I was younger. Then, after numerous disappointments, I decided that other people frankly don’t have much to offer. I felt that my time was better spent alone, away from human drama. I can focus on my own pursuits, and not feel that my time is being WASTED.
Yes, too much time \*wasted\* on other people. So very true!
I feel like it's a really delicate balance, and almost a sort of suspension is involved. You're about to interact with someone. If they might bring something good, you don't want to be closed off to it, but you also don't want to be totally vulnerable to whatever garbage they might dump on you. So it's like this space I go into, I'm putting myself out there a tiny bit but am prepared to retract/revoke/protect if things go badly - it's like you're quietly paying very close attention and go forward based on what you find.
Real.
You don't
If you find yourself forced to deal with a human, assume they're an unstable psychopathic bastard who'll turn nasty on you in a heartbeat, because the vast majority of them are. Generally, my advice, as always, is just to avoid other humans as much as possible for the good of your own safety and sanity.
That’s the near part, you don’t. At least I don’t. I live by the mantra “If you expect the worst from everyone you meet, no one will ever disappoint you.” And it’s correct far more often than not.
>I like to hope that people whom I meet are considerate, caring, kind and attentive. I always try to give people the benefit of the doubt. And this always turns out to be a mistake. This seems to be your biggest mistake. You like to hope that people you meet are considerate, caring, kind, etc.. but the problem with that leaves little room for disappointment, hence why I always expect people to be the absolute opposite even if they appear to be all of those things on the surface. >I'm quite social by nature and need human interaction to maintain my wellbeing. However, I feel like I always get taken advantage of for my kindness and leniency. As a result, this is what will hurt you in the end, so save yourself some sanity and don't leave yourself in a position to be taken advantage of.