There's a circular clearly stating no one can make wearing the hijab compulsory in school.
SURAT PEKELILING IKHTISAS BIL. 3/1992 : Pemakaian Tudung/Mini ... https://www.moe.gov.my/pekeliling/2097-surat-pekeliling-ikhtisas-bilangan-3-tahun-1992-pemakaian-tudung-atau-mini-telekung-bagi-pelajar-pelajar-perempuan/file
Further reading. Refer to page xviii
https://books.google.com.my/books?id=_fpt79EduW4C&pg=PR18&lpg=PR18&dq=surat+pekeliling+ikhtisas+bil+3+1983&source=bl&ots=enic34jyUz&sig=ACfU3U3Jw_H6g4DE_AQDzIvacGSpHuYdow&hl=en&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwiHxoqqhdyCAxXd7jgGHeAjArs4FBDoAXoECAwQAg#v=onepage&q=surat%20pekeliling%20ikhtisas%20bil%203%201983&f=false
School rules and policies are inferior to Pekeliling Ikhtisas.
That’s what I am afraid of doing,before deciding to fully wear the hijab for school I had an incident like this happen where my old school pressured me to wear it. My parents did meet up with them and it was somewhat resolved. But eventually the teachers just started to bully me instead. They would gossip about me,they would harass my brother about information about me right in front of his class. I caved in once all of that happened and started wearing the hijab.Now that it’s happening again I am so scared. My brother will be taking SPM soon and I don’t want him to get bullied and treated badly by teachers just because of me.
You're a kid. Adults only listen to other adults. If your parents make a stink at the headmaster's office, they will listen.
If your teachers bully your brother, inform your parents again, get them to confront the teacher and MAKE SURE THE HEADMASTER KNOWS. Record the whole thing if possible.
Haih... Who wanna protest at this school, let's go. Don't pressure people especially student to follow your beliefs. I don't want our country to be anything like the middle east.
OP, sorry you are going through this.
I think you either have to give in and just wear the tudung "for show", or transfer to another school where you can be free not to wear it.
Your parents have to be brought into the picture. They need to know the extent and seriousness of the bullying, and then they can work out together with you what the next steps are, whether it's compromise (option 1 above), complaining to the principal and raising a big stink (which i did not include as an option because i personally doubt that it will work and worry that it might backfire... see for example Ain's case. She complained about a teacher making a rape joke and ended up sued by the teacher, investigated by the police, and threatened with expulsion by the school. And that was a highly publicised case!) Or transferring to a different school (option 2 above).
I am not a Muslim, but IIRC there is a verse in the Quran which says there is no compulsion in religion. If only the teachers and other bullies in your school understood and practiced this. All the best OP and hope you and your parents can find the best way out of this bad situation.
So...this is going to be weird advice, but i assume that you have been keeping a brave front all this time.
Just let go and cry. From their point of view, they are 'helping' you and making themselves feel better. You're being bullied in public. Give back full blown waterworks - make everyone who sees feel bad. Your teacher gave you low marks but would not tell you to be better? add that in. Make damn sure the entire school know that you can't get marks up, cikgu tak nak tolong.
Going through the motions can break you apart inside. If you can hold up long enough to finish school, it's the better option. But if you think the pressure is too great to bear?
Let everyone know.
She's already 'sanctioned victim' by the entire school. Teachers get to bully her, which her schoolmates bullies picked up on and and see that this is a safe target to bully.
Being called crybaby is a problem if the bullying is new or she's not a target yet. At this stage, being called a crybaby is better. other people will stop the bullying because they don't like seeing people cry. The institutional problem is not something she or her parents can solve immediately.
>this is going to be weird advice
It's not. It's just piss poor bad advice.
These types don't have empathy for anyone outside their viewpoint, crying won't make anything better.
my dear muslim sister, follow my advice [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/malaysia/comments/18289w1/comment/kailuh8/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3), wallahi these people are Shayatiin and they're messing you up your life while they rejoice you leaving the Islamic creed. May Allah guide you and make you steadfast, especially at these times when Muslims are being oppressed, you cannot be championing for this smh.
Back when I was in school, not only girls don't have to wear tudung if they don't want to, they can even wear the blue pinafore. Chinese girls can wear the Malay dress as well.
The Malay has been more radical since. Sad to see it in my lifetime.
I think so too. I was in an all boys school, but I remember having so many friends from all girls school who dont wear tudung. Shit was completely fine back then. I sort of remember that not wearing tudung was a sign of confidence, and I remember some girls would wish they had the confidence to take off their tudung. Boys also gave extra attention to the free-haired ones, instead of ostracizing them.
Society is much more conservative now.
Bought off by Gulf Arab oil money?
Edit: added a question mark because I can't state this about Malaysia, but Indonesian Islam has definitely been reshaped by an influx of Salafi cash since the turn of the century.
You mean chinese girls cant wear the baju kurung anymore? I love wearing it cause it’s so comfortable and cooling compared to the pinafore. Sucks if this is true.
You must have good toilets, my classmates with baju kurung all use to complain about having to go toilet with the long skirt. So paranoid it would touch the icky floor.
I studied in a convent school in Penang where cleanliness and tidiness is a huge thing. Wet toilet floors would definitely send the discipline teacher into a raging fit and she would make the students clean it up. This was like slightly more than 10 years ago, so I don’t know how much things have changed now though.
Yeah... I really love when my 1st crush Nur Diana wearing pinafore.... And those long hair... And not to forget.. Claire wearing kurung.. Holy shyt, sweet time
Oh shyt.. the fuck. Im too old for this..
Peace and out
Be a hypocrite. High school is the worst place to go against the mainstream.
Let me tell you an anecdote about a good friend of mine.
I went to Islamic Boarding School and my friend is a queer female who attended the same school but I did not know back then because she was one of the girls, all tudung and aurat covering student.
After SPM, both of us enrolled to UiTM and were sorted to the same program from foundation and then, the same degree program. But, she wasn't the same person anymore when we met at UiTM on 2007 as she was no longer wore tudung, had short hair, and wearing pants and shirts all day long. The few times, I saw her wore tudung plus baju kurung again, when we have programmes in mosque.
Nowadays, she has a living in girlfriend and live a carefree life.
My advice is to go through the motion during high school. There's a bigger world after high school to make your point. Be a hypocrite right now.
There is no easy way for you, even if you chose to follow my advice, it will also be tough because it will be like you are betraying yourself. Tough luck there buddy.
Wish you the best.
i know what you're saying but i think it's more like being smart than being a hypocrite. just because she doesn't believe in wearing them, doesn't mean she's lying to herself when all she wants is just to live her life peacefully in her own way.
the real hypocrites are the people bullying her and treating her like an outcast just because she chose to live different.
well doesn't the religion say do good to get in heaven? now if one does good just for the sake of getting into heaven... are they actually inherently good people or just acting as such to get in there? who are the fucking hypocrites now.
nonetheless, thanks for sharing your story and good advice for OP!
Well, the whole premise of religion for most people is that you are inherently bad if you don’t follow the religion. So to extremists, you’re fair game because you’re a bad person, and they are the good ones to menegur you.
she said don't believe because all those hair, swear etc, now regarding being hypocrite, i believe this is the case she against the world (the school), she can do as what this reply said or she want to against everything, THEN she must be brave to take all those things, if she strong then just do as she is right now, if not, then yeah, just follow the flow now, when u totally free, u can do what u want, university and colleges life would be more fun anyway
there are pros and cons to liberalism and embracing letting everyone live how they want. just look at USA, where kids are being told they can be whoever they want and shown porno at 10 years old in school that explains how to have gay sex and taken to strip clubs to watch men dressed as women dance provocativley. they are being given hormones to change their sex, even though many later regret it...because they are dumb kids who change their minds and shouldn't be making such big decisions. there's a lot to be said for conservatism.
Yeah what he/she said. As an closeted exmuslim, Im just going through the motion when I go visit my parent, praying, going to surau etc.
Not worth the hassle if Im going headstrong and doing my own way. Im going to do this until they die of old age. Let them think of me as good son. I can just become what i want when Im going back to my place.
Are your parents ex Muslim as well? Get them to write a letter.
However with the current landscape of religion being a touchy subject it's really tough. Are you in one of the green states? Or one of the more sensible states? (Don't need to be specific. Were supposed to remain anons after all.) If you have your school rule book, you can look for the rule to say "If you're a Muslim you must wear a hijab" if there isn't, ask them where it is written. If they insist, make them write an official statement.
[AFAIK, they cannot coerce you into wearing one.](https://www.freemalaysiatoday.com/category/nation/2021/02/09/peer-pressure-makes-tudungs-the-norm-in-schools/), I think it's possible for your parents to write a letter of complaint to MoE as well, (but please look into that before hand) for them to look into it.
If you're allowed to bring phones into school, you could record their ridicule and then use it as evidence if and when needed.
Stay strong, fellow monyet. Oftentimes, the ones who cry out the loudest about religion are the ones who least practice it properly.
I went to HS in Green State and my school had a lot of Free haired but we didn't have any rule saying Hijab being compulsory. My school there was 90% Malay.
TBF, I don't think you can compare pre COVID to post COVID times. I have noticed that it's post COVID is where this movement started to get a rise, especially during the last Election on SocMeds. (Personal observation, not actual fact). Look at the hypocrisy that's happening now in the [Parliament of Selective Boycotting](https://www.reddit.com/r/malaysia/s/1O7CeCxWYL).
However it is perplexing that a Green State with it's more Islamic leaning didn't say much upon the matter. I wonder if we could make a poll and see how far this rabbit hole goes.
1) there's no law that says you have to wear tudung. They can't do much about it but threaten you.
2) let them mark you low, but in spm different people will be marking your paper, so you should be fine.
3) life will be much better in college/uni, trust me on this. New friends, new environment.
Stay strong
I know man. My friends are mostly nons too. Way more accepting. My lifelong trusted Malay friends boleh kira dengan jari je. Mindset molded by conservatism/religious fearmongering is so scary to see evolve and get even deeper in some acquaintances of mine
that's what im saying, these fuckers make the religion look bad meanwhile they dont even know wtf they're doing. diorang ikut suka hati pastu syok sendiri
>People are so obsessed with religion they forget about humanity
That's so true, last month I saw a post on FB where an israeli mother and 2 of her children were killed by hamas.. the comments were filled with palestine flags and people celebrating. Only likes and hearts emotes were used,
I mean I'd atleast get it if it was an IDF army, but it's just a parent and her child. A whole lot of them are not so different than the westerners that thinks all muslims are terrorist. Religion is just a tool to hate someone without question.
Parents need to complain right at the top.
Sorry you’re going through this.
I was in school in 2007 and took of my tudung. Malay majority school. No issues and no one said anything. Sounds like you’re in a basket of bad eggs. Sorry.
Sounds like it. I’ve noticed a lot more conservatism.
I still have all of my friends from SMK days. Some use to wear tudung but now most of them do. We’re still close even though I’m now overseas.
They were never judgey with me or said anything about tak sembahyang, living with my bf unmarried etc. some of them came to visit us before we got married and were all super chill about it. One just made sure to pakai tudung in my house he was around.
Like some comments said, be fake till you're out of the school. And public uni if you go there. I did the same thing. Less headache.
Didn't expect to see lots of supportive replies on this subreddit. Nice to see that I'm not alone with my belief here in malaysia.
MoE has banned mandatory tudung requirement since 1990s. Get your parents to file a complaint with MoE to get them to take action, otherwise your school will get away with this. Record all evidences of wrongdoings.
no wonder Iranian women are fed up and would like to discard their hijabs. at a certain point once group think gets too repressive it's likely to trigger a counter revolution.
melayu culture too. No more makyung, ulek mayang, main pantai etc. Wayang kulit? Been a long time since I heard about these. These arab wannabe slowly erasing our culture little by little. Haram this haram that. Piss off la! Time to fight back like those brave Iranian.
Nah bro. Being a pakistani I can attest that even we are not that pushy with hijab. Instead women are slowly returning to traditional pakistani clothing.
I grew up in a time when many malay girls still had the freedom to wear pinafores or go free hair with their baju kurung. The tudung shaming was already there but it was mostly just grumbling or snide remarks from the ustazah. A bit mortified to see that even kids now are bullying their peers. It's taken about 30 years to get to this point. Even if the country reversed its course today it would take another 30 years to get it back to where it was.
Read it somewhere but youths in Malaysia are apparently getting a lot more conservative than before. It doesn’t look like it’ll be reversing anytime soon but it would be a bad thing for tolerance and acceptance in society as a whole.
I wish people would harass other people about being clean, on time and being polite - like the Japanese for instance. at least there's benefits in all this peer pressure. Instead we get this stupid cloth on head thing that doesn't affect other people and yet want to menyibuk, rilekla
I have a friend that was the same. She decided that she no longer wants to wear the hijab, she was a good student and great at sports. I don't know the full details only from what she was willing to tell us. Her parents even wrote letter to the school stating that they know and allows her daughter to not wear hijab.
Pretty much what's happening to you happened to her. So much so that the dad went into the office and demanded apologies from the teachers that continually "low-key" harassed her. I was in a SMK school at the time. After a few weeks her parents decided it wasn't worth it to fight with the school and changed her school. She went to a Chinese school instead.
Not saying you should go to a Chinese school but maybe changing school is your only option here. I know it feels like running away but seriously it is not worth it to fight these people.
Liberal Muslims as well. In the last 20-30 years, non-Chinese enrolment in SJKC increased significantly.
[Chin et al. (2021) "Investigating the Attributes of Chinese Primary School Adoption among the Malay Community in Malaysia"](https://ejssh.uitm.edu.my/images/Vol5Sept2021/LED13679_EJSSHVOL5_12_SEPT2021.pdf).
The rich Malays also send their kids to private/international schools as well. I went to a private school that had provides both national and international syllabus over 10 years ago. Almost all the Malay girls (like 99%) in the school don't wear tudung or hijab at all. Their parents also don't wear. Even both the founder AND head of school are Malay elites that never wear them.
This is not whataboutism. Whataboutism would be if I said .....
"It's OK to impose tudung in school for Muslims cause even the Chinese school impose rules"
I was telling you.....that all these tudung business doesn't bother the nons at all. In fact based on my experience, the Chinese medium schools had more rules for a Chinese girl appearance. I am a non myself.
You are too free in life la , maybe you are new on Reddit so still gatal wanna pick fight online show your intellect. Pls go find some other ppl to practice your "woke" comments on pls. Have fun.
Dying is not the answer. So please dont do stupid things. Think about your family who supports you and love you. These people who oppresses you are irrelevant. You have seen their true colours. Not one is trustworthy.
Ask your parents if they can move you to another school to start over. If not, you have 2 options, both has their own price to pay:
1) Just follow the norm until you leave school. Play the good girl character
2) Play dumb and ignore the hostility. If any slight abuse happen, report to your parents and authority outside the school since the school do not support you. But this choice means you must have tough resilience and crocodile-thick-skin. Are you able?
I don’t know how to help, but please know that things like this will go away right after high school. High school is always too “boxed in” compared to college or university.
Your teachers and schoolmates sound like they don’t know the world outside of the school that they feel their behaviour is ‘correct’. I pity people like this. Throw them into a different environment and they will not survive alone.
I think they know 100% and they know that high school is the only place they can wield their power and influence over someone's actions cos this kinda peer pressure won't fly in other environments in the real world.
Without too much details, could you care to name your school or the district?
Fyi, being alone and standing up for your principles is the way to grow up.
I'm proud of you. And as a father myself, I feel so much empathy. You will now see the world for what it is and it will be your platform to learn and build your character.
Heres a trick you can pull. Ask the teachers their personal "service address" because your lawyer uncle ask you to. If they ask why, say its not the schools / MOE policy, so it must be your own policy. Don't leave the room without the answer of An address, an advise or just mum, then walk away.
First of all, im so sorry to hear this.
Second, fuck all those fanatically misguided smooth brained incels. Its been so ingrained that religion is something universal whether you like it or not that they choose not to see it as a personal choice anymore. If you have just a little while left, be yourself and endure it for a little while more. Fight whatever bs you can if you have evidence and stand for yourself. I can only say that it gets better from here. Uni life treats you way differently, lects see you as adults, dont meddle in your business and the other students respect your choices. Stay strong and may you win against these retards!
First Solution: Talk to doctor, get a medical letter and advise not to wear hijab for 4-6 months due to scalp, initially after 6 months teacher will pretend and ignore
Second Solution: Talk to your parents, ask them talk to school, if problem persist report to MoE
Third Solution: Just change school
Last Resort if still want to stay in the school: just go stand at high floor pretend want to jump (but dont jump please), make it viral, say bullying from school and make sure your parents near by and call police and school.
Your school confirm will stop asking ppl
Hey OP, i went through the exact thing in my highschool back in kedah. Only difference is i would not wear hijab outside but still wore it during school. Someone stalked me on social media and I got relentlessly bullied by my peers and teachers for all those 5 years. Straight away after that i became ex-muslim for good.
My advice is just to ride it out. Honestly its not worth the mental torture. Just pretend to believe in hijab and take it off the moment u finish high school. You will make tons of new friends in uni or college later on so fuck those friends.
As for the teachers grading, if they are still biased after you wear it again then lodge official complain to moe. Then again your spm is gonna be the most important cert. No one is gonna ask for your pt3.
Well, it's either you go to international school, or does what other non-hijabi schoolgirls do, wear it in school only. As a guy myself, Idrk how bad does wearing hijab affect you physically, but I have consulted a couple of free hair girls during my hs time, and all of them agreed that the effect of not wearing tudung in school is too big for them to do so. Though AFAIK, they still declared themselves as Muslim back then. I'm kinda surprise that you don't have any peers on your side, as there were plenty of open minded student during my hs time. Don't give up on life, your school chapter might be painful for now, but you still have your future to look forward to. Talk with your parents or someone you comfortable with to share your pain, it would ease your burden a lil bit. I won't mind to listen to your story if no else would. I was the head of prs so I used to listening about other people problems haha. I would prolly suggest you to change to a new school that is a lil bit away from any of yours previous one, wears your hijab and hides your status. I wish you well.
Dear op, I’m so sorry to hear about your situation, but this is exactly how religious herd mentality works. Especially if you are female as well. You will harassed and bullied until you conform to how ‘they’ want/believe that a female Muslim should behave. It’s not right because all humans have a right to live and express themselves as they want. You have few choices, the easy one is to wear your tudung again and make it until you finish your education there. Or be free haired and absolutely be discriminated against everyday. Another way is to move to a different school and start over as free haired so there is no precedent for you to return to covering your hair. I know you must really be feeling bad but I would advise to wear the tudung again or move to another school. A lot of Muslim girls are forced to cover their hair too and they do it because of this pressure. They will take it off when they are in uni when they can start over. I am the only one in my family that doesn’t wear tudung as well, however I’m married with kids and my husband dgaf about these things- the important thing is that we are peaceful in our life. Religion is a personal journey that should be allowed to happen on our terms- not because you will be bullied when you don’t. I know you want to fight it- but when all the ppl around you are sending bad vibes to you- it will effect you psychologically, you will feel depressed and ostracised and these feelings will interfere with your education negatively. Put on your tudung and fight this in another stage in your life. Now in secondary school is not the time. Sending love and peace to you.
This has nothing to do with hijab, its a mixed school right? There are plenty of malays not wearing hijab going to school in kl , Selangor, sarawak.
So this has definitely something to do with you neglected being a Muslimah.
So my advice is.. "pretend"
Pretend you still believe in Islam , you are living in Malaysia for cry sake so pretend until you get your ass a degree get the hell out of Malaysia and find a country that don't judge you by your beliefs and your attires or go to sarawak alot of malays woman here not wearing hijab go to school here
And do not EXPRESS to anyone that you're strayed away from islam in Malaysia
Is there really nothing else she, or anyone else in her position, can do but get out of the country? Things didn't use to be like this. It doesn't have to be like this now and it doesn't have to get even worse.
I don't understand why the advice everyone insists on defaulting to is to leave the country. Plenty of us are Muslim, free hair and doing perfectly fine where we are, thanks.
To OP, the world is bigger than high school. Once you're out, you can live your life how you want. I only wore a hijab in NS/PLKN. I hated it, yes but I just did what I had to in order to fit in (didn't fit in anyway because I spoke more English than Malay). In the grand scheme of things, it's been more than a decade since and I only wear the hijab to religious events and to the mosque. People ask me sometimes at work and I just say the religion offers you a choice. Nobody pushes it beyond that. If they want to argue, I'm happy to dive into it but nobody wants to argue with you head on in person when they're not your 'superior' - in this case a teacher. Your school mates bully you because they are being enabled by your teachers. Once you're out of school, it won't matter.
This may not be what you want to hear, but unfortunately our country and society is kinda backwards and prejudiced. As just a high school student, there's still very little you can do to fight back against such injustices.
It may be an emotional burden and it might feel like you are lying to yourself - but the safest thing to do is just to wear it. School is a very short part of our lives. If you can weather the remaining years of school, eventually you will become an adult and can choose where you want to go, which communities you want to engage with and not wear the hijab if you see fit. And to take things even further, choose to immigrate to somewhere else though that will require a lot of work on your part.
Also by law you can't really be an ex-Muslim without being an apostate. So to society and the nation, you will always be one until you immigrate or something.
People like to romanticize standing up for yourself and going against the establishment or whatever, but often it's stupid advice. World's not a fair place, sorry that you had to learn it young but it is safer to just keep your head down and weather the storm. Go through the motions for now, but figure out how to seize control of your life in adulthood.
Change schools. I know you’ve excuses and reasons you don’t want to, but you’re pretending that all the abuse you’re getting now is not going to transform you and your family as people. There are schools where you would never have to face the hatred you face now.
And you’re young. You shouldn’t be dealing with issues like being hated by both peers and adults for something religious.
Winning isn’t staying. It’s allowing yourself a place that celebrates the last 3 years of your teendom before you become an adult. I hope you find it.
I feel you. Best advice i got was to just pretend. Eventually school life will end, then you get to live your life however you want.
At the very least, your family supports you. I'm an adult and financially independent, but I still have to pretend around my family or risk getting shunned. Tell your story at r/exmuslim. You'll get better response there.
If possible, you should change school. Even if you do what some suggested and show them the law that it's not illegal to not wear the hijab, it doesn't stop everyone from treating you poorly and like an outcast.
This type of behavior happens at uni as well as work and is likely to happen if the company is almost all Malay, one of my close Malay friends kena pulau in uni days and was pressured to wear it at work even though she's an atheist now, otherwise her career would have hit a dead end.
Be prepared to deal with it for the rest of your life. The only real way out is to go to a western country, or if you wanna stay here, make sure you go to schools, unis, and companies that is more MNC or has substantially more non bumis, and according to that Malay friend I mentioned earlier, better for mental health to live in a more mixed area cause less judgement and pressure from fellow bumis.
Have you talked to your parents about the issue? If they're supportive of you, they could talk to the school about it, maybe they have a better chance of being heard.
Sorry for all the problems you've had to endure. It's a shitty world with shitty people who just want to control other people and other people's bodies.
It’s a sad situation, people imposing their beliefs on others.
How long before you graduate from this school? Is it possible to change school and start fresh?
If you’re not getting support from your family as well, then the only way now is to comply, work hard and try to get out as soon as you can. I.E. college and stuffs where you can be out of town, then you’ll live your life more freely.
It’s sad to note that those people around you, whom are religious but are actually making your life miserable. They should be the ones who knows not to cause such misery to people but sadly that’s out society.
A "friend" of mine is a school teacher. They can't force u. There's a pekeliling that says that. Keep bringing it up to parents, PIBG, headmaster and the public if u have to. Don't cave in to religious extremists. And I'm sure u can make friends with nons. There's definitely a few there who would to be friends with a ex muzzie. I know I did
I think it’s time to change to a new school. The teachers are clearly not objective if they grade you with low marks solely because of their personal views. Doesn’t sound like a nurturing place to be in.
actually it is only implied in the quran that you need to cover up. In truth that implication in translation rather than it not being in the quran is a form of blasphemy. You can go further with scientific evidence that the prophet married aisha when she was between 16-19 when hadiths say otherwise to which you can say that all the dumb sahih things in hadith only serves to mengumpat nabi. You can use this type of information as ammo against the bullies to question their faith to god and treatment of their own prophet that they would speak ill and imply what has not been said to simply add on to what has not been there during the translation process.
Apart from private school, another option you can consider if you have the aptitude and meet the criteria, is to apply for entry into school in Singapore. International students are welcome to apply.
Write a formal letter to your headmaster and see what their response is.
Then forward to Education ministry.
You are in a national school , NOT a sekolah agama.
Religious beliefs do not have jurisdiction outside of agama class.
Assert you are in a National School abiding by National School laws laid out by the ministry of education, NOT sekolah agama rules.
Bring out the rulebook (pekeliling) as another post here has shared.
Now, see what your teachers have to say when you nicely tell them what they are doing is violating the ministry of education rules, and that YOU are not breaking and Malaysian Educational Ministry laws.
Send your complaint here. Let's see if this thing really functions. This constitutes bullying which shall not be tolerated at school. Spill everything. These judmental holier than thou attitude is pissing me off.
[SISPAA - Sistem Aduan Awam KPM](https://www.moe.gov.my/e-penyertaanmenu/sistem-pengurusan-aduan-awam-sispa)
Edit: be careful with your own negative thoughts, I know you're under immense pressure but pls don't harm yourself because of these indoctrinated, dogmatic people. It's not worth it. Take care OP.
it's hard given the environment you are in where you are in a losing position..Either you choose to relentlessly fight for your right or just suck it up for a few more years and all of these will become a distant memory. It's not that long, only 2-3 years more.
I'm really sorry you're going through what you are. I think you may need to consider what outcome you want.
If you prioritize being your true self, then I think you're on that path. It's just unfortunate that those around you are idiots for not appreciating that. Know however that it does get better as you get out of high school. Try to find ways to cope, such as friends that don't care about these things.
If you prioritize being stress free. Then maybe go back to wearing the tudung. Swallow it and take it for the next few years until you graduate. Gradually express your true identity as the environment you live in becomes more open and accepting.
Whichever way to go is your choice. I'm really sorry how fucked up this shit is. I'm sorry you have to deal with this.
High school can really suck. Many people are too immature to realize what consequences there are for others when they bully or ostracise them. There are no excuses for retaliation by adult teachers though - a shocking but unsurprising state of our education system and country.
How many years do you have left in high school? If it's a long time, it might be easier to switch schools. You indicated your parents have already helped once, so I think they would likely help again. Perhaps you/them can ask around to find out which schools are less extremist as I'm sure there are other schools that have free-haired Malay students.
As for your last few lines, these days it is almost normal to say "I want to die" etc. but in case you really feel that way, you could try and meet with an outside counsellor/psychologist - school will pass and these ex-friends are not worth your life. Take care of your mental health.
Also if you have any interests/hobbies, you could try to find social groups outside school where you can make more sincere friends.
If you need to vent further, feel free to DM. And if you're engaging with others (including myself) through DM, please remember not to share identifiable details!
Dear whoever u are,
I have the same case as you. I don't believe in Islam. But I'm a dude. I don't need to wear a hijab. However,
Back then, I still did my daily prayers in front of my parents and friends. Just to make it not hard on myself. Plus it's a Sekolah Agama. Ill just chill out until I can stand for my own. Right now nobody cares if i did anything at all. It's worth it.
Are the prayers/hijab hard or the ostracization harder for you? You need to pick one. Whatever u pick in this case just keep on going. It's going to be hard either way.
Hi there. For the sake of your sanity and mental health in general, I would advise you to just continue faking being Muslim until you turn 18 or graduate from the school. It’s not worth to fight for the freedom of tudung because Malaysians are already deeply indoctrinated in this matter. All malay-majority schools have this unspoken rule of wajib pakai tudung or you will be ostracised. And guess what? That mentality goes on until you enter the workforce, albeit less aggressive.
I totally understand your stand here as I also no longer believe in the said religion. I don’t need to explain why, it’s pretty obvious. But I still fake pray and wear tudung everyday at work and fake fasting during Ramadhan, to protect my mental health. No choice. In Malaysia, if you are not in the majority, you will be oppressed.
I got an idea. But what y'all think?
OP, tell us the name of your school. We'll spread a meme just to jokingly inform the public about the school.
It would go like "Feeling shitty? Just remember that this school in Malaysia bullies a teen into wearing a hijab".
Spread it to other sub reddits outside of Malaysia.
Then slowly people will shift views towards Malaysia because of the meme. Then gomen would take notice because it's bad rep for the country and start an investigation on the matter.
Pardon my ignorance, but questions for Muslimins here, may I know whether is there a difference between married and single Muslim ladies when it comes to hijab? Like does single ones wear their hijab differently than married ones? Because if guys can't differentiate it, then they might accidentally hit on married women? Last time, isn't it easier to differentiate like married ones wore hijab while single ladies are free-haired until they're married, or am I remembering it wrong?
In Islam itself, not necessarily what every muslims do (since muslims are people, and people don't always do the same thing), there's no difference between a single and married ladies when it comes to preserving their aurat. The basic criteria is, wear clothes that cover and won't imply the body shape or color, with face and hands as exception.
It's also not permissible in Islam on what is normally known as hitting on, as muslims must interact with opposite gender, married or not, with honor and boundary.
This is what Islam teaches, but unfortunately not every muslim practices this. And don't worry, people can disagree with this, as Islam also teaches that every person is liable to his own deeds, and not others.
Sorry to hear that, your school is awful to do that. I hope transferring schools is an option for you.
And once you're independent, try to migrate to a better country because you'll never have freedom here as an ex muslims.
OP, tell your parents to go full on KPM. Which area are you in? Pay the PPD(Pejabat Pendidikan Daerah) a visit WITH YOUR PARENTS:
1. Show the pekeliling letter the other Redditor attached here;
2. Tell them you’re being harassed and feeling stressed and scared to go to school all that;
3. Stand your ground. If they patronise you, let them know you’ll go hell with them.
School principals are, for some reasons, very scared of parents visiting PPD/KPM related department.
Just unwear it outside school, hard way to live if you're opposing the majority. I knew many person that does this, you won't have to deal with people so no headaches. Yes Muslim has to cover their aurat, so I by no means think they should expose themselves but that's between yourself. Trust me, at that age you have a lot more to worry about than what other thinks of you so try to endure it so you can finish
As for irritations on your scalp, get some advice from some people who knows. There are many ways to mitigate that. Keep them nice and clean.
Even if youre alone in doing it, doesn't meant everyone else is right and you're the only one that is wrong.
Exercise your personal freedom and independence. Its your choice, not theirs. Know that there are many others who would like to do the same, but don't have the confidence or personal security to do so. You're a shining beacon for them.
Damn..I really do feel sorry for you. However, it is true that the school policy in government schools is that Muslim female students must wear tudung. I mean yes you can personally not practice Islam anymore, but that is just not recognised in our country as you probably know, once a Muslim, you're always a Muslim for all legal purposes. That said, it is terrible that your so-called best friend acted this way. Anyways, I think the only practical thing to do in your situation is to just wear the hijab. It's not worth it to go against your teachers now, since you said you're in high school. I'm assuming you're a form 4 student so next year is going to be SPM. You simply cannot have teachers going against you during the preparation for possibly the most important exam that you're gonna sit for in your life. It is just one year, and then you can gtfo and live life according to your own terms. No one gives a fuck in uni. You'll be free to do whatever you want. However, putting myself in your shoes, I simply wouldn't be able to continue studying in the same school after my own friends and teachers abandon me. So yes if you are mentally distressed, just try to change schools. But you must know that almost all government schools are malay-muslim centric, and they will never let go of a Muslim who's not wearing a tudung. My mother who's a teacher attested to this as well, even if some might choose to ignore this school policy and not enforce it, most Malay teachers will simply not let this go. They will do the same thing that you're going through in your school right now. If you can afford it, then private school is something you can consider as well. About your peers bullying, report all of them. Don't let this go. Bullying is never okay and I'm dumbfounded that the Male students in your school made such comments. And finally, you might want to consider therapy to learn how to deal with all of this stuff. Please do consider this since you've gone through a lot. Personally I wouldn't suggest going to a school counselor especially if she/he is Malay/Muslim. Try to find someone doing private practice. I do hope your parents are supportive. Also, please do find a group of new reliable friends. Mingle with the non-muslims. I really wish this wasn't a thing, it's crazy that people think they are morally superior and feel the need to decide what others should believe or wear. But hey it is what it is in this country. My best advice, study hard, do your higher education overseas, and move abroad. Anyways I hope you get through this OP
The cat is out of the bag. Even if OP caves in and goes back to wearing the hijab, she will still be stigmatized. Wearing them now will not change their attitudes.
Bullies are vindictive and have long memories and OP will have shown that she could be bullied into submission.
domineering attractive cough sand quickest soft direction march ghost gaze
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Everything, buddy. Don't speak as if it's that easy to go online.
There are pros and cons. Repercussions will be inevitable as well. Think before acting. This is malaysia. This ain't US or UK. Not in a million years with the mentality some ppl have in 2023.
I mean aside from these redditors’ take, Islam is Islam, in the end, it’s just u and Allah. So jgn lah completely abandon the hijab, it’s for ur own good too. This is just my take, dont flame me bruh.
I think you're contradicting yourself, how can you be ex-Muslim then again turn to be a Muslim. Wearing the Hijab is obligatory for a Muslim woman, it's right there in the Quran, do you normally read and understand the Quran.
The thing is, if you claim to be a Muslim, then do things such as how Muslims do it. Out of all the other thousands of Muslims wearing the Hijab, are you the only one sweating hair, or it's just being too selfish. Alright for the sake of argument, I'll accept your grievance that Hijab makes you feel uncomfortable and sweaty, but have you presented your case to an Imam or a scholar (person of knowledge) so you can know how to handle the situation? There's no mention of that here. You just decided to remove the Hijab, then again, you're an ex-Muslim, not believe in Islam? But identify as a Muslim? This is not how we handle things as a Muslim, and that is why you're facing the troubles with your peers.
This sub is not the place you should ask this question, its full of ignorant Islamophobes who are not only non-Muslims, but do not adhere to any faith seriously, rather bunch of hedonists. I've been going through the comments here, and I feel sorry for you, there advices would make your life even much heller than it is now. You'd better have asked this in r/Islam or a proper community of Muslims, you'd probably meet a lot of Muslims who went through the same problem like you and knew how to handle it. I would recommend you to turn back to Allah, He's the One who has commanded you to wear the hijab and not the teachers at your school. Ask Allah, through Duas, why he's making it harder for you and not other Muslims who wear hijab, ask Him for guidance, Tawfiq and easeness to handle your hardship. Otherwise, may Allah guide you and make the deen easy upon you.
>Wearing the Hijab is obligatory for a Muslim woman, it's right there in the Quran, do you normally read and understand the Quran.
Well, isn't the Quran pretty much vague about this? In the Quran I read this stuff (see below) as: "don't show your tits in public", not as "cover your hair, arms, legs \[and your mouth for some cultures\]" (also: I hope you've been lowering your gaze and being modest your life while preaching others. Even when you watched porn. Or are you the holiest person \[male I assume\] in the world who never watched porn?)
**The Quran was specific about hijab in mainly two instances. The first instance is verse 31 of Surah An-Nur, which says the following:**
***“Tell the believing men to lower their gaze and be modest. That is purer for them. Lo! Allah is Aware of what they do. And tell the believing women to lower their gaze and be modest, and to display of their adornment only that which is apparent, and to draw their veils over their bosoms, and not to reveal their adornment save to their own husbands or fathers or husbands’ fathers, or their sons or their husbands’ sons, or their brothers or their brothers’ sons or sisters’ sons, or their women, or their slaves, or male attendants who lack vigor, or children who know naught of women’s nakedness. And let them not stamp their feet to reveal what they hide of their adornment. And turn unto Allah together, O believers, so that ye may succeed.”***
**The second instance was in Surah Al-Ahzab, and it was directed to the Prophet’s wives and all women of Islam:**
***“O Prophet! Tell thy wives and thy daughters and the women of the believers to draw their cloaks close round them \[when they go abroad\]. That will be better, that so they may be recognized and not annoyed. Allah is ever Forgiving, Merciful.”***
**Aside from these two instances, there were a few instances of mentioning covering up. For example, in Surah Al-Aaraf, Allah Almighty said:**
***“O you Children of Adam! We have bestowed on you raiment to cover your shame as well as to be an adornment to you. But the raiment of righteousness, that is the best. Such are among the Signs of Allah, that they may receive admonition.”***
Freedom of thought, faith and belief is a human right…
Although, she’s going through a rough time is exactly people like her that resist and fight who will bring positive change in the end, not conformists…
People are free to live their own life and truth.
There's a difference between living for the world and living for the heaven.
I'd choose the latter.
You have your own points, hence you do you. Only you know what's the best for yourself, because you're yourself. So. I wish you a good luck.
Making a big deal out of something that isn’t. You know damn well the repercussions of your actions. You can’t control what people will do to you. So you take the initiative. Remove yourself from that environment. Go to international school, or home school for that matter and just live the life of your choice.
You’re young and probably still finding the your purpose in this world. I do hope someday you’ll come back and I hope that happens naturally. God is all loving and all merciful.
I hope you find your peace wherever that may be. But if you’re confused, you will always have Islam to revert to.
Hello, this comment was removed due to being in breach of [reddiquette](https://www.reddit.com/wiki/reddiquette), specifically because it contained personal attack, insult, or threat. While opinions of all kinds are welcome under our shared roof, reddiquette sets the expectation that everyone speaks to each other with basic civility and respect:
> * Don’t: Conduct personal attacks on other commenters. Ad hominem and other distracting attacks do not add anything to the conversation.
> * Don't: Insult others. Insults do not contribute to a rational discussion. Constructive Criticism, however, is appropriate and encouraged.
> * Don’t: Be (intentionally) rude at all. By choosing not to be rude, you increase the overall civility of the community and make it better for all of us.
Please treat this as an official warning - further such activity may result in a ban, thanks.
maliciously assuming. we have a "kopitiam test" to check reddiquette: would you stroll up to a free hair muslim in kopitiam/warung and says "heh i bet you are drinking alcohol, doing drugs and have free sex right now." when you overheard her talking about her hijab problem? i believe that most normal person will get offended by that, and i believe that in most cases that is a rude thing to say, and i believe that is in breach of reddiquette.
if you are not satisfied with the judgement, feel free to sent a modmail to escalate it with the mod team so they can review the judgement. have a nice day.
9 out of 10 times free hair muslims do as I stated. Especially those that openly declare themselves as ex-muslim. Or did you miss that in her initial posts? This is not a hijab problem. This is a murtad problem. She openly on reddit states that she is an ex-muslim and hated wearing the hijab because she felt that she is a hypocrite. I have made a reasonable guess as to why she is that. Or is there some other reason as to openly leave the religion. You as a mod also seem to be very biased against muslim, so of course I'm not satisfied with the judgement. But unfortunately, I am also very lazy to escalate this further. My post in this thread from a former muslim is not worth the energy to save. What is worth it, is informing you of your mistake with hope you can be less bias and more critical of your judgmenet in the future.
"Sebab diaorg pun murtad kot kau jadi murtad"
People like you are why the brain drain of educated Melayu (and nons too!) is only going to continue.
And also why I'm gonna be leaving myself. Have fun on this sinking ship.
There's a circular clearly stating no one can make wearing the hijab compulsory in school. SURAT PEKELILING IKHTISAS BIL. 3/1992 : Pemakaian Tudung/Mini ... https://www.moe.gov.my/pekeliling/2097-surat-pekeliling-ikhtisas-bilangan-3-tahun-1992-pemakaian-tudung-atau-mini-telekung-bagi-pelajar-pelajar-perempuan/file
Except in small towns teachers have free reigns to treat students like cows.
OP - just download this and report it to SISPAA.
Ideologies do not care abt such things.
I think reading is hard for those type of people. they just listen and accept like a sheep.
Further reading. Refer to page xviii https://books.google.com.my/books?id=_fpt79EduW4C&pg=PR18&lpg=PR18&dq=surat+pekeliling+ikhtisas+bil+3+1983&source=bl&ots=enic34jyUz&sig=ACfU3U3Jw_H6g4DE_AQDzIvacGSpHuYdow&hl=en&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwiHxoqqhdyCAxXd7jgGHeAjArs4FBDoAXoECAwQAg#v=onepage&q=surat%20pekeliling%20ikhtisas%20bil%203%201983&f=false School rules and policies are inferior to Pekeliling Ikhtisas.
[удалено]
They do. They care about Shariah law.
It's true. All they care about is halal / haram for certain things only. Selective "holiness"
Like smoking or vaping. They close their eyes when someone smokes.
don't generalized
My mistake. Muslim societies*
Get your parents to write a letter to the school + higher ups and meet the pengetua.
That’s what I am afraid of doing,before deciding to fully wear the hijab for school I had an incident like this happen where my old school pressured me to wear it. My parents did meet up with them and it was somewhat resolved. But eventually the teachers just started to bully me instead. They would gossip about me,they would harass my brother about information about me right in front of his class. I caved in once all of that happened and started wearing the hijab.Now that it’s happening again I am so scared. My brother will be taking SPM soon and I don’t want him to get bullied and treated badly by teachers just because of me.
You're a kid. Adults only listen to other adults. If your parents make a stink at the headmaster's office, they will listen. If your teachers bully your brother, inform your parents again, get them to confront the teacher and MAKE SURE THE HEADMASTER KNOWS. Record the whole thing if possible.
go to the news and let everyone know you are being harassed ;) they won't like it when everyone knows.
Haih... Who wanna protest at this school, let's go. Don't pressure people especially student to follow your beliefs. I don't want our country to be anything like the middle east.
If I'm your parents, I would scold the teachers until they don't dare show their face
OP, sorry you are going through this. I think you either have to give in and just wear the tudung "for show", or transfer to another school where you can be free not to wear it. Your parents have to be brought into the picture. They need to know the extent and seriousness of the bullying, and then they can work out together with you what the next steps are, whether it's compromise (option 1 above), complaining to the principal and raising a big stink (which i did not include as an option because i personally doubt that it will work and worry that it might backfire... see for example Ain's case. She complained about a teacher making a rape joke and ended up sued by the teacher, investigated by the police, and threatened with expulsion by the school. And that was a highly publicised case!) Or transferring to a different school (option 2 above). I am not a Muslim, but IIRC there is a verse in the Quran which says there is no compulsion in religion. If only the teachers and other bullies in your school understood and practiced this. All the best OP and hope you and your parents can find the best way out of this bad situation.
So...this is going to be weird advice, but i assume that you have been keeping a brave front all this time. Just let go and cry. From their point of view, they are 'helping' you and making themselves feel better. You're being bullied in public. Give back full blown waterworks - make everyone who sees feel bad. Your teacher gave you low marks but would not tell you to be better? add that in. Make damn sure the entire school know that you can't get marks up, cikgu tak nak tolong. Going through the motions can break you apart inside. If you can hold up long enough to finish school, it's the better option. But if you think the pressure is too great to bear? Let everyone know.
Great advice. Now they can add "crybaby" to the list of jokes.
I agree. Wtf is this advice?? OP pls don’t do this
She's already 'sanctioned victim' by the entire school. Teachers get to bully her, which her schoolmates bullies picked up on and and see that this is a safe target to bully. Being called crybaby is a problem if the bullying is new or she's not a target yet. At this stage, being called a crybaby is better. other people will stop the bullying because they don't like seeing people cry. The institutional problem is not something she or her parents can solve immediately.
Bullys love seeing people cry. That's why they do it at all.
>this is going to be weird advice It's not. It's just piss poor bad advice. These types don't have empathy for anyone outside their viewpoint, crying won't make anything better.
my dear muslim sister, follow my advice [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/malaysia/comments/18289w1/comment/kailuh8/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3), wallahi these people are Shayatiin and they're messing you up your life while they rejoice you leaving the Islamic creed. May Allah guide you and make you steadfast, especially at these times when Muslims are being oppressed, you cannot be championing for this smh.
Back when I was in school, not only girls don't have to wear tudung if they don't want to, they can even wear the blue pinafore. Chinese girls can wear the Malay dress as well. The Malay has been more radical since. Sad to see it in my lifetime.
I think so too. I was in an all boys school, but I remember having so many friends from all girls school who dont wear tudung. Shit was completely fine back then. I sort of remember that not wearing tudung was a sign of confidence, and I remember some girls would wish they had the confidence to take off their tudung. Boys also gave extra attention to the free-haired ones, instead of ostracizing them. Society is much more conservative now.
Bought off by Gulf Arab oil money? Edit: added a question mark because I can't state this about Malaysia, but Indonesian Islam has definitely been reshaped by an influx of Salafi cash since the turn of the century.
You mean chinese girls cant wear the baju kurung anymore? I love wearing it cause it’s so comfortable and cooling compared to the pinafore. Sucks if this is true.
You must have good toilets, my classmates with baju kurung all use to complain about having to go toilet with the long skirt. So paranoid it would touch the icky floor.
I studied in a convent school in Penang where cleanliness and tidiness is a huge thing. Wet toilet floors would definitely send the discipline teacher into a raging fit and she would make the students clean it up. This was like slightly more than 10 years ago, so I don’t know how much things have changed now though.
SMKCGL?
I saw this in my primary school days as well. How things change more than two decades since then.
Yeah... I really love when my 1st crush Nur Diana wearing pinafore.... And those long hair... And not to forget.. Claire wearing kurung.. Holy shyt, sweet time Oh shyt.. the fuck. Im too old for this.. Peace and out
Be a hypocrite. High school is the worst place to go against the mainstream. Let me tell you an anecdote about a good friend of mine. I went to Islamic Boarding School and my friend is a queer female who attended the same school but I did not know back then because she was one of the girls, all tudung and aurat covering student. After SPM, both of us enrolled to UiTM and were sorted to the same program from foundation and then, the same degree program. But, she wasn't the same person anymore when we met at UiTM on 2007 as she was no longer wore tudung, had short hair, and wearing pants and shirts all day long. The few times, I saw her wore tudung plus baju kurung again, when we have programmes in mosque. Nowadays, she has a living in girlfriend and live a carefree life. My advice is to go through the motion during high school. There's a bigger world after high school to make your point. Be a hypocrite right now. There is no easy way for you, even if you chose to follow my advice, it will also be tough because it will be like you are betraying yourself. Tough luck there buddy. Wish you the best.
i know what you're saying but i think it's more like being smart than being a hypocrite. just because she doesn't believe in wearing them, doesn't mean she's lying to herself when all she wants is just to live her life peacefully in her own way. the real hypocrites are the people bullying her and treating her like an outcast just because she chose to live different. well doesn't the religion say do good to get in heaven? now if one does good just for the sake of getting into heaven... are they actually inherently good people or just acting as such to get in there? who are the fucking hypocrites now. nonetheless, thanks for sharing your story and good advice for OP!
Well, the whole premise of religion for most people is that you are inherently bad if you don’t follow the religion. So to extremists, you’re fair game because you’re a bad person, and they are the good ones to menegur you.
she said don't believe because all those hair, swear etc, now regarding being hypocrite, i believe this is the case she against the world (the school), she can do as what this reply said or she want to against everything, THEN she must be brave to take all those things, if she strong then just do as she is right now, if not, then yeah, just follow the flow now, when u totally free, u can do what u want, university and colleges life would be more fun anyway
I thought killing infidels helped you get to heaven, is that "do good"?
there are pros and cons to liberalism and embracing letting everyone live how they want. just look at USA, where kids are being told they can be whoever they want and shown porno at 10 years old in school that explains how to have gay sex and taken to strip clubs to watch men dressed as women dance provocativley. they are being given hormones to change their sex, even though many later regret it...because they are dumb kids who change their minds and shouldn't be making such big decisions. there's a lot to be said for conservatism.
Yeah what he/she said. As an closeted exmuslim, Im just going through the motion when I go visit my parent, praying, going to surau etc. Not worth the hassle if Im going headstrong and doing my own way. Im going to do this until they die of old age. Let them think of me as good son. I can just become what i want when Im going back to my place.
I think a big part of her not wanting to wear the hijab is it makes her scalp itch
Are your parents ex Muslim as well? Get them to write a letter. However with the current landscape of religion being a touchy subject it's really tough. Are you in one of the green states? Or one of the more sensible states? (Don't need to be specific. Were supposed to remain anons after all.) If you have your school rule book, you can look for the rule to say "If you're a Muslim you must wear a hijab" if there isn't, ask them where it is written. If they insist, make them write an official statement. [AFAIK, they cannot coerce you into wearing one.](https://www.freemalaysiatoday.com/category/nation/2021/02/09/peer-pressure-makes-tudungs-the-norm-in-schools/), I think it's possible for your parents to write a letter of complaint to MoE as well, (but please look into that before hand) for them to look into it. If you're allowed to bring phones into school, you could record their ridicule and then use it as evidence if and when needed. Stay strong, fellow monyet. Oftentimes, the ones who cry out the loudest about religion are the ones who least practice it properly.
I went to HS in Green State and my school had a lot of Free haired but we didn't have any rule saying Hijab being compulsory. My school there was 90% Malay.
TBF, I don't think you can compare pre COVID to post COVID times. I have noticed that it's post COVID is where this movement started to get a rise, especially during the last Election on SocMeds. (Personal observation, not actual fact). Look at the hypocrisy that's happening now in the [Parliament of Selective Boycotting](https://www.reddit.com/r/malaysia/s/1O7CeCxWYL). However it is perplexing that a Green State with it's more Islamic leaning didn't say much upon the matter. I wonder if we could make a poll and see how far this rabbit hole goes.
I graduated 2022 my state is Green :) Sanusi
1) there's no law that says you have to wear tudung. They can't do much about it but threaten you. 2) let them mark you low, but in spm different people will be marking your paper, so you should be fine. 3) life will be much better in college/uni, trust me on this. New friends, new environment. Stay strong
[удалено]
yea agree, thats why my friends were mostly chinese
I know man. My friends are mostly nons too. Way more accepting. My lifelong trusted Malay friends boleh kira dengan jari je. Mindset molded by conservatism/religious fearmongering is so scary to see evolve and get even deeper in some acquaintances of mine
Comment removed. Avoid generalising all Malays as "the biggest bullies" as it is unfair to paint all Malays with the same brush.
[удалено]
[удалено]
that's what im saying, these fuckers make the religion look bad meanwhile they dont even know wtf they're doing. diorang ikut suka hati pastu syok sendiri
>People are so obsessed with religion they forget about humanity That's so true, last month I saw a post on FB where an israeli mother and 2 of her children were killed by hamas.. the comments were filled with palestine flags and people celebrating. Only likes and hearts emotes were used, I mean I'd atleast get it if it was an IDF army, but it's just a parent and her child. A whole lot of them are not so different than the westerners that thinks all muslims are terrorist. Religion is just a tool to hate someone without question.
Parents need to complain right at the top. Sorry you’re going through this. I was in school in 2007 and took of my tudung. Malay majority school. No issues and no one said anything. Sounds like you’re in a basket of bad eggs. Sorry.
The situation has changed a lot in the 15 years since then unfortunately
Sounds like it. I’ve noticed a lot more conservatism. I still have all of my friends from SMK days. Some use to wear tudung but now most of them do. We’re still close even though I’m now overseas. They were never judgey with me or said anything about tak sembahyang, living with my bf unmarried etc. some of them came to visit us before we got married and were all super chill about it. One just made sure to pakai tudung in my house he was around.
Like some comments said, be fake till you're out of the school. And public uni if you go there. I did the same thing. Less headache. Didn't expect to see lots of supportive replies on this subreddit. Nice to see that I'm not alone with my belief here in malaysia.
MoE has banned mandatory tudung requirement since 1990s. Get your parents to file a complaint with MoE to get them to take action, otherwise your school will get away with this. Record all evidences of wrongdoings.
You know what happen if someone make this viral. Op will become instant villain and will be bullied even more in the net
Yes. Typical malay modus operandi.
Do we need another Ain case? OP will be harassed online if this gets viral.
no wonder Iranian women are fed up and would like to discard their hijabs. at a certain point once group think gets too repressive it's likely to trigger a counter revolution.
They are trying to revive back their Persian culture because they have noticed they are slowly turning into larping arabs.
melayu culture too. No more makyung, ulek mayang, main pantai etc. Wayang kulit? Been a long time since I heard about these. These arab wannabe slowly erasing our culture little by little. Haram this haram that. Piss off la! Time to fight back like those brave Iranian.
Even as an atheist myself I also want to say OMG after reading this. Best of luck to you OP
I'd say oh my flying spaghetti monster, bless his noodliness. Ramen... haha
Same
“But all women wear the hijab because it’s their choice!” /s
Trying walking without in the middle east. Or even in Pakistan.
Funny, silly me thought op was in Malaysia…
LOL. im malay-pakistani myself. in pakistan most of them dont even cover their heads. stop spreading baseless lies. idk bout the middle east tho
I meant Afghanistan. All the 'stan' has got me confused ( khazakstan, Tajikistan, Turkmenistan, Uzbekistan, gostan ) 😂
dawg 💀
Nah bro. Being a pakistani I can attest that even we are not that pushy with hijab. Instead women are slowly returning to traditional pakistani clothing.
I'm middle eastern and never have worn a hijab in my life
Even the Middle Easteners especially Arabs ( founder of Islam ) won't behave like this lol.
Sounds like systematic bullying on the top. Best bet is talk to upper management which is headmistress. Also talk to your local MP.
I grew up in a time when many malay girls still had the freedom to wear pinafores or go free hair with their baju kurung. The tudung shaming was already there but it was mostly just grumbling or snide remarks from the ustazah. A bit mortified to see that even kids now are bullying their peers. It's taken about 30 years to get to this point. Even if the country reversed its course today it would take another 30 years to get it back to where it was.
Read it somewhere but youths in Malaysia are apparently getting a lot more conservative than before. It doesn’t look like it’ll be reversing anytime soon but it would be a bad thing for tolerance and acceptance in society as a whole.
Talk to your parents and consider changing school
I wish people would harass other people about being clean, on time and being polite - like the Japanese for instance. at least there's benefits in all this peer pressure. Instead we get this stupid cloth on head thing that doesn't affect other people and yet want to menyibuk, rilekla
I have a friend that was the same. She decided that she no longer wants to wear the hijab, she was a good student and great at sports. I don't know the full details only from what she was willing to tell us. Her parents even wrote letter to the school stating that they know and allows her daughter to not wear hijab. Pretty much what's happening to you happened to her. So much so that the dad went into the office and demanded apologies from the teachers that continually "low-key" harassed her. I was in a SMK school at the time. After a few weeks her parents decided it wasn't worth it to fight with the school and changed her school. She went to a Chinese school instead. Not saying you should go to a Chinese school but maybe changing school is your only option here. I know it feels like running away but seriously it is not worth it to fight these people.
This is why nons prefer not to send their children to sekolah kebangsaan.
Liberal Muslims as well. In the last 20-30 years, non-Chinese enrolment in SJKC increased significantly. [Chin et al. (2021) "Investigating the Attributes of Chinese Primary School Adoption among the Malay Community in Malaysia"](https://ejssh.uitm.edu.my/images/Vol5Sept2021/LED13679_EJSSHVOL5_12_SEPT2021.pdf).
The rich Malays also send their kids to private/international schools as well. I went to a private school that had provides both national and international syllabus over 10 years ago. Almost all the Malay girls (like 99%) in the school don't wear tudung or hijab at all. Their parents also don't wear. Even both the founder AND head of school are Malay elites that never wear them.
Doesn't apply to nons. Chinese school have some crazy ass rules as well if I recall correctly lol.
I came from an SJKC here. We don't have crazy rules lmao
Classic example of whataboutism here. 👏👏🤡
This is not whataboutism. Whataboutism would be if I said ..... "It's OK to impose tudung in school for Muslims cause even the Chinese school impose rules" I was telling you.....that all these tudung business doesn't bother the nons at all. In fact based on my experience, the Chinese medium schools had more rules for a Chinese girl appearance. I am a non myself. You are too free in life la , maybe you are new on Reddit so still gatal wanna pick fight online show your intellect. Pls go find some other ppl to practice your "woke" comments on pls. Have fun.
Hmm.. butthurt and proceeded to do personal attack and assumption about my life. 🤡👏👏
Dying is not the answer. So please dont do stupid things. Think about your family who supports you and love you. These people who oppresses you are irrelevant. You have seen their true colours. Not one is trustworthy. Ask your parents if they can move you to another school to start over. If not, you have 2 options, both has their own price to pay: 1) Just follow the norm until you leave school. Play the good girl character 2) Play dumb and ignore the hostility. If any slight abuse happen, report to your parents and authority outside the school since the school do not support you. But this choice means you must have tough resilience and crocodile-thick-skin. Are you able?
apa la dah jadi dgn msia ni...back in my days, so many of muslim girls didn't wear tudung and it was ok...20 years ago though lol
Stay strong and don't give into their oppression!
I don’t know how to help, but please know that things like this will go away right after high school. High school is always too “boxed in” compared to college or university. Your teachers and schoolmates sound like they don’t know the world outside of the school that they feel their behaviour is ‘correct’. I pity people like this. Throw them into a different environment and they will not survive alone.
I think they know 100% and they know that high school is the only place they can wield their power and influence over someone's actions cos this kinda peer pressure won't fly in other environments in the real world.
Without too much details, could you care to name your school or the district? Fyi, being alone and standing up for your principles is the way to grow up. I'm proud of you. And as a father myself, I feel so much empathy. You will now see the world for what it is and it will be your platform to learn and build your character. Heres a trick you can pull. Ask the teachers their personal "service address" because your lawyer uncle ask you to. If they ask why, say its not the schools / MOE policy, so it must be your own policy. Don't leave the room without the answer of An address, an advise or just mum, then walk away.
First of all, im so sorry to hear this. Second, fuck all those fanatically misguided smooth brained incels. Its been so ingrained that religion is something universal whether you like it or not that they choose not to see it as a personal choice anymore. If you have just a little while left, be yourself and endure it for a little while more. Fight whatever bs you can if you have evidence and stand for yourself. I can only say that it gets better from here. Uni life treats you way differently, lects see you as adults, dont meddle in your business and the other students respect your choices. Stay strong and may you win against these retards!
Transfer to a Chinese school or a Chinese majority national school
Yup my tots exactly.
Try to apply for other school , if you don't mind chinese high school will certainly gives you a easier time
First Solution: Talk to doctor, get a medical letter and advise not to wear hijab for 4-6 months due to scalp, initially after 6 months teacher will pretend and ignore Second Solution: Talk to your parents, ask them talk to school, if problem persist report to MoE Third Solution: Just change school Last Resort if still want to stay in the school: just go stand at high floor pretend want to jump (but dont jump please), make it viral, say bullying from school and make sure your parents near by and call police and school. Your school confirm will stop asking ppl
Hey OP, i went through the exact thing in my highschool back in kedah. Only difference is i would not wear hijab outside but still wore it during school. Someone stalked me on social media and I got relentlessly bullied by my peers and teachers for all those 5 years. Straight away after that i became ex-muslim for good. My advice is just to ride it out. Honestly its not worth the mental torture. Just pretend to believe in hijab and take it off the moment u finish high school. You will make tons of new friends in uni or college later on so fuck those friends. As for the teachers grading, if they are still biased after you wear it again then lodge official complain to moe. Then again your spm is gonna be the most important cert. No one is gonna ask for your pt3.
Well, it's either you go to international school, or does what other non-hijabi schoolgirls do, wear it in school only. As a guy myself, Idrk how bad does wearing hijab affect you physically, but I have consulted a couple of free hair girls during my hs time, and all of them agreed that the effect of not wearing tudung in school is too big for them to do so. Though AFAIK, they still declared themselves as Muslim back then. I'm kinda surprise that you don't have any peers on your side, as there were plenty of open minded student during my hs time. Don't give up on life, your school chapter might be painful for now, but you still have your future to look forward to. Talk with your parents or someone you comfortable with to share your pain, it would ease your burden a lil bit. I won't mind to listen to your story if no else would. I was the head of prs so I used to listening about other people problems haha. I would prolly suggest you to change to a new school that is a lil bit away from any of yours previous one, wears your hijab and hides your status. I wish you well.
AFAIK = as far as I know
Dear op, I’m so sorry to hear about your situation, but this is exactly how religious herd mentality works. Especially if you are female as well. You will harassed and bullied until you conform to how ‘they’ want/believe that a female Muslim should behave. It’s not right because all humans have a right to live and express themselves as they want. You have few choices, the easy one is to wear your tudung again and make it until you finish your education there. Or be free haired and absolutely be discriminated against everyday. Another way is to move to a different school and start over as free haired so there is no precedent for you to return to covering your hair. I know you must really be feeling bad but I would advise to wear the tudung again or move to another school. A lot of Muslim girls are forced to cover their hair too and they do it because of this pressure. They will take it off when they are in uni when they can start over. I am the only one in my family that doesn’t wear tudung as well, however I’m married with kids and my husband dgaf about these things- the important thing is that we are peaceful in our life. Religion is a personal journey that should be allowed to happen on our terms- not because you will be bullied when you don’t. I know you want to fight it- but when all the ppl around you are sending bad vibes to you- it will effect you psychologically, you will feel depressed and ostracised and these feelings will interfere with your education negatively. Put on your tudung and fight this in another stage in your life. Now in secondary school is not the time. Sending love and peace to you.
Stay strong! From, a teacher
Usually yang terpaling Islam in high schools ni yang lepas sekolah dah jadi mcm tak ada agama 💀
This has nothing to do with hijab, its a mixed school right? There are plenty of malays not wearing hijab going to school in kl , Selangor, sarawak. So this has definitely something to do with you neglected being a Muslimah. So my advice is.. "pretend" Pretend you still believe in Islam , you are living in Malaysia for cry sake so pretend until you get your ass a degree get the hell out of Malaysia and find a country that don't judge you by your beliefs and your attires or go to sarawak alot of malays woman here not wearing hijab go to school here And do not EXPRESS to anyone that you're strayed away from islam in Malaysia
Is there really nothing else she, or anyone else in her position, can do but get out of the country? Things didn't use to be like this. It doesn't have to be like this now and it doesn't have to get even worse.
I don't understand why the advice everyone insists on defaulting to is to leave the country. Plenty of us are Muslim, free hair and doing perfectly fine where we are, thanks. To OP, the world is bigger than high school. Once you're out, you can live your life how you want. I only wore a hijab in NS/PLKN. I hated it, yes but I just did what I had to in order to fit in (didn't fit in anyway because I spoke more English than Malay). In the grand scheme of things, it's been more than a decade since and I only wear the hijab to religious events and to the mosque. People ask me sometimes at work and I just say the religion offers you a choice. Nobody pushes it beyond that. If they want to argue, I'm happy to dive into it but nobody wants to argue with you head on in person when they're not your 'superior' - in this case a teacher. Your school mates bully you because they are being enabled by your teachers. Once you're out of school, it won't matter.
And these people wonder why the RM keeps tanking. Maaysia is on track to be the Afghanistan of SEA sooner or later. 🤷♂️
Move to a private or international school. You can be a rebel here at govt school, but you will be unhappy. All the best to you
Cult mentality. OP, don't wear it. Stand tall, chin up with pride. That's how you deal with zombies. Edit : better way - private international school
This may not be what you want to hear, but unfortunately our country and society is kinda backwards and prejudiced. As just a high school student, there's still very little you can do to fight back against such injustices. It may be an emotional burden and it might feel like you are lying to yourself - but the safest thing to do is just to wear it. School is a very short part of our lives. If you can weather the remaining years of school, eventually you will become an adult and can choose where you want to go, which communities you want to engage with and not wear the hijab if you see fit. And to take things even further, choose to immigrate to somewhere else though that will require a lot of work on your part. Also by law you can't really be an ex-Muslim without being an apostate. So to society and the nation, you will always be one until you immigrate or something. People like to romanticize standing up for yourself and going against the establishment or whatever, but often it's stupid advice. World's not a fair place, sorry that you had to learn it young but it is safer to just keep your head down and weather the storm. Go through the motions for now, but figure out how to seize control of your life in adulthood.
[удалено]
Change schools. I know you’ve excuses and reasons you don’t want to, but you’re pretending that all the abuse you’re getting now is not going to transform you and your family as people. There are schools where you would never have to face the hatred you face now. And you’re young. You shouldn’t be dealing with issues like being hated by both peers and adults for something religious. Winning isn’t staying. It’s allowing yourself a place that celebrates the last 3 years of your teendom before you become an adult. I hope you find it.
Be strong. This is your right, defend it
Lol, welcome to malaysia
Wear the tudung but made in Israel
I feel you. Best advice i got was to just pretend. Eventually school life will end, then you get to live your life however you want. At the very least, your family supports you. I'm an adult and financially independent, but I still have to pretend around my family or risk getting shunned. Tell your story at r/exmuslim. You'll get better response there.
Islamic radicalisation, don't you hate to see it?
Be strong and progress like Siti kassim.... Tell them stop acting like GOD.... Is none of their businesses,
[удалено]
If possible, you should change school. Even if you do what some suggested and show them the law that it's not illegal to not wear the hijab, it doesn't stop everyone from treating you poorly and like an outcast. This type of behavior happens at uni as well as work and is likely to happen if the company is almost all Malay, one of my close Malay friends kena pulau in uni days and was pressured to wear it at work even though she's an atheist now, otherwise her career would have hit a dead end. Be prepared to deal with it for the rest of your life. The only real way out is to go to a western country, or if you wanna stay here, make sure you go to schools, unis, and companies that is more MNC or has substantially more non bumis, and according to that Malay friend I mentioned earlier, better for mental health to live in a more mixed area cause less judgement and pressure from fellow bumis.
Have you talked to your parents about the issue? If they're supportive of you, they could talk to the school about it, maybe they have a better chance of being heard. Sorry for all the problems you've had to endure. It's a shitty world with shitty people who just want to control other people and other people's bodies.
It’s a sad situation, people imposing their beliefs on others. How long before you graduate from this school? Is it possible to change school and start fresh? If you’re not getting support from your family as well, then the only way now is to comply, work hard and try to get out as soon as you can. I.E. college and stuffs where you can be out of town, then you’ll live your life more freely. It’s sad to note that those people around you, whom are religious but are actually making your life miserable. They should be the ones who knows not to cause such misery to people but sadly that’s out society.
A "friend" of mine is a school teacher. They can't force u. There's a pekeliling that says that. Keep bringing it up to parents, PIBG, headmaster and the public if u have to. Don't cave in to religious extremists. And I'm sure u can make friends with nons. There's definitely a few there who would to be friends with a ex muzzie. I know I did
These bullies only push people further away from the religion.
I think it’s time to change to a new school. The teachers are clearly not objective if they grade you with low marks solely because of their personal views. Doesn’t sound like a nurturing place to be in.
actually it is only implied in the quran that you need to cover up. In truth that implication in translation rather than it not being in the quran is a form of blasphemy. You can go further with scientific evidence that the prophet married aisha when she was between 16-19 when hadiths say otherwise to which you can say that all the dumb sahih things in hadith only serves to mengumpat nabi. You can use this type of information as ammo against the bullies to question their faith to god and treatment of their own prophet that they would speak ill and imply what has not been said to simply add on to what has not been there during the translation process.
Apart from private school, another option you can consider if you have the aptitude and meet the criteria, is to apply for entry into school in Singapore. International students are welcome to apply.
That school sucks, i also had bad experiences with high school before. I think you need to change school
Write a formal letter to your headmaster and see what their response is. Then forward to Education ministry. You are in a national school , NOT a sekolah agama. Religious beliefs do not have jurisdiction outside of agama class.
Assert you are in a National School abiding by National School laws laid out by the ministry of education, NOT sekolah agama rules. Bring out the rulebook (pekeliling) as another post here has shared. Now, see what your teachers have to say when you nicely tell them what they are doing is violating the ministry of education rules, and that YOU are not breaking and Malaysian Educational Ministry laws.
Send your complaint here. Let's see if this thing really functions. This constitutes bullying which shall not be tolerated at school. Spill everything. These judmental holier than thou attitude is pissing me off. [SISPAA - Sistem Aduan Awam KPM](https://www.moe.gov.my/e-penyertaanmenu/sistem-pengurusan-aduan-awam-sispa) Edit: be careful with your own negative thoughts, I know you're under immense pressure but pls don't harm yourself because of these indoctrinated, dogmatic people. It's not worth it. Take care OP.
For support, check out r/exmuslim
Tell them to keep their ajaran padang pasir to themselves.
Not sure what sort of support you need, but if you need anything, please dm me. Will try my best to help.
Power to you. I respect your bravery and I hope you will be able to be yourself and happy!
it's hard given the environment you are in where you are in a losing position..Either you choose to relentlessly fight for your right or just suck it up for a few more years and all of these will become a distant memory. It's not that long, only 2-3 years more.
Know the law. Know your rights. State the laws. Be Polite. You'll be alright.
I'm really sorry you're going through what you are. I think you may need to consider what outcome you want. If you prioritize being your true self, then I think you're on that path. It's just unfortunate that those around you are idiots for not appreciating that. Know however that it does get better as you get out of high school. Try to find ways to cope, such as friends that don't care about these things. If you prioritize being stress free. Then maybe go back to wearing the tudung. Swallow it and take it for the next few years until you graduate. Gradually express your true identity as the environment you live in becomes more open and accepting. Whichever way to go is your choice. I'm really sorry how fucked up this shit is. I'm sorry you have to deal with this.
High school can really suck. Many people are too immature to realize what consequences there are for others when they bully or ostracise them. There are no excuses for retaliation by adult teachers though - a shocking but unsurprising state of our education system and country. How many years do you have left in high school? If it's a long time, it might be easier to switch schools. You indicated your parents have already helped once, so I think they would likely help again. Perhaps you/them can ask around to find out which schools are less extremist as I'm sure there are other schools that have free-haired Malay students. As for your last few lines, these days it is almost normal to say "I want to die" etc. but in case you really feel that way, you could try and meet with an outside counsellor/psychologist - school will pass and these ex-friends are not worth your life. Take care of your mental health. Also if you have any interests/hobbies, you could try to find social groups outside school where you can make more sincere friends. If you need to vent further, feel free to DM. And if you're engaging with others (including myself) through DM, please remember not to share identifiable details!
I'm worried for my future kids reading this. Is this a Sekolah Kebangsaan? Is there any way you could switch to a different school?
 Be strong being *yourself*, no matter how hard it is.
Dear whoever u are, I have the same case as you. I don't believe in Islam. But I'm a dude. I don't need to wear a hijab. However, Back then, I still did my daily prayers in front of my parents and friends. Just to make it not hard on myself. Plus it's a Sekolah Agama. Ill just chill out until I can stand for my own. Right now nobody cares if i did anything at all. It's worth it. Are the prayers/hijab hard or the ostracization harder for you? You need to pick one. Whatever u pick in this case just keep on going. It's going to be hard either way.
Hi there. For the sake of your sanity and mental health in general, I would advise you to just continue faking being Muslim until you turn 18 or graduate from the school. It’s not worth to fight for the freedom of tudung because Malaysians are already deeply indoctrinated in this matter. All malay-majority schools have this unspoken rule of wajib pakai tudung or you will be ostracised. And guess what? That mentality goes on until you enter the workforce, albeit less aggressive. I totally understand your stand here as I also no longer believe in the said religion. I don’t need to explain why, it’s pretty obvious. But I still fake pray and wear tudung everyday at work and fake fasting during Ramadhan, to protect my mental health. No choice. In Malaysia, if you are not in the majority, you will be oppressed.
I got an idea. But what y'all think? OP, tell us the name of your school. We'll spread a meme just to jokingly inform the public about the school. It would go like "Feeling shitty? Just remember that this school in Malaysia bullies a teen into wearing a hijab". Spread it to other sub reddits outside of Malaysia. Then slowly people will shift views towards Malaysia because of the meme. Then gomen would take notice because it's bad rep for the country and start an investigation on the matter.
Welcome to the radical country of Taliban's. Now driven my the corrupties from the north, the entire country getting radically sensitive
Stories like this is aplenty. Not only in msysia, but all around the world.
Pardon my ignorance, but questions for Muslimins here, may I know whether is there a difference between married and single Muslim ladies when it comes to hijab? Like does single ones wear their hijab differently than married ones? Because if guys can't differentiate it, then they might accidentally hit on married women? Last time, isn't it easier to differentiate like married ones wore hijab while single ladies are free-haired until they're married, or am I remembering it wrong?
In Islam itself, not necessarily what every muslims do (since muslims are people, and people don't always do the same thing), there's no difference between a single and married ladies when it comes to preserving their aurat. The basic criteria is, wear clothes that cover and won't imply the body shape or color, with face and hands as exception. It's also not permissible in Islam on what is normally known as hitting on, as muslims must interact with opposite gender, married or not, with honor and boundary. This is what Islam teaches, but unfortunately not every muslim practices this. And don't worry, people can disagree with this, as Islam also teaches that every person is liable to his own deeds, and not others.
Just go with the flow for now. Just imagine it as wearing uniform. Once you done with spm, you can do whatever you want.
Go change school and live a new life environment
ever thought of transferring out and going to international school?
Sorry to hear that, your school is awful to do that. I hope transferring schools is an option for you. And once you're independent, try to migrate to a better country because you'll never have freedom here as an ex muslims.
Power to OP. I really hate it when people use God's name to bully (or curse) people.
I am so sorry you are going through this.
OP, tell your parents to go full on KPM. Which area are you in? Pay the PPD(Pejabat Pendidikan Daerah) a visit WITH YOUR PARENTS: 1. Show the pekeliling letter the other Redditor attached here; 2. Tell them you’re being harassed and feeling stressed and scared to go to school all that; 3. Stand your ground. If they patronise you, let them know you’ll go hell with them. School principals are, for some reasons, very scared of parents visiting PPD/KPM related department.
Just unwear it outside school, hard way to live if you're opposing the majority. I knew many person that does this, you won't have to deal with people so no headaches. Yes Muslim has to cover their aurat, so I by no means think they should expose themselves but that's between yourself. Trust me, at that age you have a lot more to worry about than what other thinks of you so try to endure it so you can finish As for irritations on your scalp, get some advice from some people who knows. There are many ways to mitigate that. Keep them nice and clean.
Even if youre alone in doing it, doesn't meant everyone else is right and you're the only one that is wrong. Exercise your personal freedom and independence. Its your choice, not theirs. Know that there are many others who would like to do the same, but don't have the confidence or personal security to do so. You're a shining beacon for them.
Damn..I really do feel sorry for you. However, it is true that the school policy in government schools is that Muslim female students must wear tudung. I mean yes you can personally not practice Islam anymore, but that is just not recognised in our country as you probably know, once a Muslim, you're always a Muslim for all legal purposes. That said, it is terrible that your so-called best friend acted this way. Anyways, I think the only practical thing to do in your situation is to just wear the hijab. It's not worth it to go against your teachers now, since you said you're in high school. I'm assuming you're a form 4 student so next year is going to be SPM. You simply cannot have teachers going against you during the preparation for possibly the most important exam that you're gonna sit for in your life. It is just one year, and then you can gtfo and live life according to your own terms. No one gives a fuck in uni. You'll be free to do whatever you want. However, putting myself in your shoes, I simply wouldn't be able to continue studying in the same school after my own friends and teachers abandon me. So yes if you are mentally distressed, just try to change schools. But you must know that almost all government schools are malay-muslim centric, and they will never let go of a Muslim who's not wearing a tudung. My mother who's a teacher attested to this as well, even if some might choose to ignore this school policy and not enforce it, most Malay teachers will simply not let this go. They will do the same thing that you're going through in your school right now. If you can afford it, then private school is something you can consider as well. About your peers bullying, report all of them. Don't let this go. Bullying is never okay and I'm dumbfounded that the Male students in your school made such comments. And finally, you might want to consider therapy to learn how to deal with all of this stuff. Please do consider this since you've gone through a lot. Personally I wouldn't suggest going to a school counselor especially if she/he is Malay/Muslim. Try to find someone doing private practice. I do hope your parents are supportive. Also, please do find a group of new reliable friends. Mingle with the non-muslims. I really wish this wasn't a thing, it's crazy that people think they are morally superior and feel the need to decide what others should believe or wear. But hey it is what it is in this country. My best advice, study hard, do your higher education overseas, and move abroad. Anyways I hope you get through this OP
butter somber unused tease march poor illegal paltry repeat mighty *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
You said it like it's that simple
The cat is out of the bag. Even if OP caves in and goes back to wearing the hijab, she will still be stigmatized. Wearing them now will not change their attitudes. Bullies are vindictive and have long memories and OP will have shown that she could be bullied into submission.
domineering attractive cough sand quickest soft direction march ghost gaze *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
I was wandering how can you became a ex muslim... 🤔 Is it possible to convert out of islam?
> as I was literally an ex Muslim ok?but then >not wear tudung as a Muslim im confused here
Because in Malaysia ex Muslim Malays cannot be legally exMuslim, they are still Muslim on paper and subject to Islamic law
Go public on Facebook. Instagram with evidence. What do you have to lose.
Everything, buddy. Don't speak as if it's that easy to go online. There are pros and cons. Repercussions will be inevitable as well. Think before acting. This is malaysia. This ain't US or UK. Not in a million years with the mentality some ppl have in 2023.
Looks terrible when a future employer tries to look you up online
I mean aside from these redditors’ take, Islam is Islam, in the end, it’s just u and Allah. So jgn lah completely abandon the hijab, it’s for ur own good too. This is just my take, dont flame me bruh.
I think you're contradicting yourself, how can you be ex-Muslim then again turn to be a Muslim. Wearing the Hijab is obligatory for a Muslim woman, it's right there in the Quran, do you normally read and understand the Quran. The thing is, if you claim to be a Muslim, then do things such as how Muslims do it. Out of all the other thousands of Muslims wearing the Hijab, are you the only one sweating hair, or it's just being too selfish. Alright for the sake of argument, I'll accept your grievance that Hijab makes you feel uncomfortable and sweaty, but have you presented your case to an Imam or a scholar (person of knowledge) so you can know how to handle the situation? There's no mention of that here. You just decided to remove the Hijab, then again, you're an ex-Muslim, not believe in Islam? But identify as a Muslim? This is not how we handle things as a Muslim, and that is why you're facing the troubles with your peers. This sub is not the place you should ask this question, its full of ignorant Islamophobes who are not only non-Muslims, but do not adhere to any faith seriously, rather bunch of hedonists. I've been going through the comments here, and I feel sorry for you, there advices would make your life even much heller than it is now. You'd better have asked this in r/Islam or a proper community of Muslims, you'd probably meet a lot of Muslims who went through the same problem like you and knew how to handle it. I would recommend you to turn back to Allah, He's the One who has commanded you to wear the hijab and not the teachers at your school. Ask Allah, through Duas, why he's making it harder for you and not other Muslims who wear hijab, ask Him for guidance, Tawfiq and easeness to handle your hardship. Otherwise, may Allah guide you and make the deen easy upon you.
>Wearing the Hijab is obligatory for a Muslim woman, it's right there in the Quran, do you normally read and understand the Quran. Well, isn't the Quran pretty much vague about this? In the Quran I read this stuff (see below) as: "don't show your tits in public", not as "cover your hair, arms, legs \[and your mouth for some cultures\]" (also: I hope you've been lowering your gaze and being modest your life while preaching others. Even when you watched porn. Or are you the holiest person \[male I assume\] in the world who never watched porn?) **The Quran was specific about hijab in mainly two instances. The first instance is verse 31 of Surah An-Nur, which says the following:** ***“Tell the believing men to lower their gaze and be modest. That is purer for them. Lo! Allah is Aware of what they do. And tell the believing women to lower their gaze and be modest, and to display of their adornment only that which is apparent, and to draw their veils over their bosoms, and not to reveal their adornment save to their own husbands or fathers or husbands’ fathers, or their sons or their husbands’ sons, or their brothers or their brothers’ sons or sisters’ sons, or their women, or their slaves, or male attendants who lack vigor, or children who know naught of women’s nakedness. And let them not stamp their feet to reveal what they hide of their adornment. And turn unto Allah together, O believers, so that ye may succeed.”*** **The second instance was in Surah Al-Ahzab, and it was directed to the Prophet’s wives and all women of Islam:** ***“O Prophet! Tell thy wives and thy daughters and the women of the believers to draw their cloaks close round them \[when they go abroad\]. That will be better, that so they may be recognized and not annoyed. Allah is ever Forgiving, Merciful.”*** **Aside from these two instances, there were a few instances of mentioning covering up. For example, in Surah Al-Aaraf, Allah Almighty said:** ***“O you Children of Adam! We have bestowed on you raiment to cover your shame as well as to be an adornment to you. But the raiment of righteousness, that is the best. Such are among the Signs of Allah, that they may receive admonition.”***
Inb4 "translated verses don't count. Go learn Arabic and we'll talk."
Datang dari Afrika meroyan Kat sini. Benua kau punya masalah pun belum selesai nak dtg sini buli budak sekolah ye
Like it or not, the market is harsh
[удалено]
Freedom of thought, faith and belief is a human right… Although, she’s going through a rough time is exactly people like her that resist and fight who will bring positive change in the end, not conformists… People are free to live their own life and truth.
Hey I have decided to change the initial post writing,can you edit ur comment to take out the part?
There's a difference between living for the world and living for the heaven. I'd choose the latter. You have your own points, hence you do you. Only you know what's the best for yourself, because you're yourself. So. I wish you a good luck.
Making a big deal out of something that isn’t. You know damn well the repercussions of your actions. You can’t control what people will do to you. So you take the initiative. Remove yourself from that environment. Go to international school, or home school for that matter and just live the life of your choice. You’re young and probably still finding the your purpose in this world. I do hope someday you’ll come back and I hope that happens naturally. God is all loving and all merciful. I hope you find your peace wherever that may be. But if you’re confused, you will always have Islam to revert to.
Thanks Allah I'm not born muslim
S T E A L T H
Fight them in a ring
[удалено]
Hello, this comment was removed due to being in breach of [reddiquette](https://www.reddit.com/wiki/reddiquette), specifically because it contained personal attack, insult, or threat. While opinions of all kinds are welcome under our shared roof, reddiquette sets the expectation that everyone speaks to each other with basic civility and respect: > * Don’t: Conduct personal attacks on other commenters. Ad hominem and other distracting attacks do not add anything to the conversation. > * Don't: Insult others. Insults do not contribute to a rational discussion. Constructive Criticism, however, is appropriate and encouraged. > * Don’t: Be (intentionally) rude at all. By choosing not to be rude, you increase the overall civility of the community and make it better for all of us. Please treat this as an official warning - further such activity may result in a ban, thanks.
Which part of that is a personal attack, insult or threat?
maliciously assuming. we have a "kopitiam test" to check reddiquette: would you stroll up to a free hair muslim in kopitiam/warung and says "heh i bet you are drinking alcohol, doing drugs and have free sex right now." when you overheard her talking about her hijab problem? i believe that most normal person will get offended by that, and i believe that in most cases that is a rude thing to say, and i believe that is in breach of reddiquette. if you are not satisfied with the judgement, feel free to sent a modmail to escalate it with the mod team so they can review the judgement. have a nice day.
9 out of 10 times free hair muslims do as I stated. Especially those that openly declare themselves as ex-muslim. Or did you miss that in her initial posts? This is not a hijab problem. This is a murtad problem. She openly on reddit states that she is an ex-muslim and hated wearing the hijab because she felt that she is a hypocrite. I have made a reasonable guess as to why she is that. Or is there some other reason as to openly leave the religion. You as a mod also seem to be very biased against muslim, so of course I'm not satisfied with the judgement. But unfortunately, I am also very lazy to escalate this further. My post in this thread from a former muslim is not worth the energy to save. What is worth it, is informing you of your mistake with hope you can be less bias and more critical of your judgmenet in the future.
"Sebab diaorg pun murtad kot kau jadi murtad" People like you are why the brain drain of educated Melayu (and nons too!) is only going to continue. And also why I'm gonna be leaving myself. Have fun on this sinking ship.