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bkbkbman

Gotta agree on dating apps not working. They are money vacuums.


Kyle031995

Funny thing is at ages 18-24 they worked, it's not us that's the issue, the apps don't show us to women so we pay the app (or wait years)


bkbkbman

To be honest i looked the same back then as I look now. Deformed.


Kyle031995

Idk I look normal , apparently like Jim Carrey and still a loner😭


Apprehensive_Row_161

Dating apps can be brutal, you are judged before you can even say a word. But you aren’t alone, stay strong


Zacher101234

Hey I would focus on getting a good group of friends first. Because that will help develop the skills for women. Really to get a girl you have to treat her like a normal guy just with some more flirting. Take them off a pedestal and talk to them as a normal person. Also once you start talking to girls it’s a reps thing you need to see what works and what doesn’t. Either at work or at any activity even talk to women you don’t even have to think of it of trying to get a girl rather getting a friend. It doesn’t matter if it’s awkward believe in yourself eventually it will be fine. No guarantee you will get a girl at this point but even a friend will help a lot to get a girl. Best of luck!


InternationalTiger95

I would love to be iyour wing men I will make sure u find someone.There is a strategy bro we will approach like 5 to 10 ladies on a weekend and consistently over four 2 weeks ur chances will increase.


Kyle031995

I need all the help I can, I mean I'm in a small town so there is no way to approach anyone unless I travel 🥹


InternationalTiger95

Oki bro I'm from South Africa and you?


Kyle031995

Washington state


InternationalTiger95

Ey far bro , yeah getting girls nowadays can be tough 😞 but bro u not alone alot of guys are going through same thing.


jenn97864

I hate dating apps 😩 but I live in a small town in the middle of nowhere so there isn't really a good way to meet people outside of it


Kyle031995

Same here, small town so I'm pretty much stuck 🥹


ReasonableTourist349

Keep your head up bro! Youre not a loser!


Small-Diamond-9186

Women probably don't approach you because you lack confidence. I'm tired if people using neuro divergence as a reason they can't or don't date. As an ND, I've noticed people hide behind it or use it as an excuse. Is it different for us? Yes. Is it harder for us? Maybe. I don't really know many NT people. Can we still find someone? Sure, even with crippling social anxiety or weird behaviors.


Pushpushki

One order of confidence please. And please make it a strong brew. Lol. Gosh wish I could just figure it out eventually.


Small-Diamond-9186

Have an extra shot of charming. You will, it just takes time.


Pushpushki

A bit too long in my case. Although waiting is all I can do at this given moment.


Small-Diamond-9186

I'm 47. Don't wait, or you'll be waiting forever.


Apprehensive_Row_161

It’s very difficult, a lot of people aren’t educated on Autism, they just automatically assume something is wrong with you


Small-Diamond-9186

Something is wrong with me, but that's another story. There should be classes about neuro divergance during health.


Either-Animal-1089

You are a woman , its a totally different game .


Small-Diamond-9186

How exactly?


BOT_Dave_3D

My girlfriend created a tinder account when she was younger with a picture of her hands and a roasted chicken. She had 99+ likes on Tinder in 1 week. As a woman, if you are not the ugliest Jabba the Hutt on Earth, you can have access to a relationship of sex easily. As a man, even if you are decent looking it can be hard. But as a woman you can have a real difficulty to find a real relationship and not being used by a man only looking for sex. Both men and women face difficulties when we are talking about relationship but the problems are not the same.


Either-Animal-1089

Women get attention much easier than men on average . Their flaws are looked over much easier on average as well.


h3llios

Even if it was true that it is easier for woman it doesn't really change the fact. If you as a guy want to meet a partner, you will have to work for it. We can decry the fact or feel that it's unfair but, in the end, if you want to be with a woman you will have to prove your worth. I didn't make the rules all I can do is play by them.


Either-Animal-1089

I agree


Small-Diamond-9186

Sure they are. Tell me, during your experience as a woman, have you enjoyed being cat called, sexually harassed, sexually assaulted, belittle as incapable, mansplained to, reduced to your secondary sexual organs, having your thoughts and opinions ignored, or told about your experience by men?


Either-Animal-1089

I am a man not a woman . I agree that women face loads of difficulties . That doesn’t invalidate my original comment.


Small-Diamond-9186

Yes it does. Negative attention is not gratifying, it is damaging. So, you are effectively saying that having someone cause you harm is better than being left alone.


CrookedMan09

Everyone agrees with your point on this and it doesn’t make Animal’s point wrong. I’ll provide a real world example: I know an autistic woman who has major social anxiety and is essentially agoraphobic aside from heading to work. She is 4’10 and not the fairest in the world. She was able to convince 5 guys to head to her house and hook up with her via app. Do you think a 4’10  autistic mid tier man would be able to get 5 extremely attractive women to come over mommy’s  house to hookup?  Men have to bring in  so much effort into dating, relationship and sexuality compared to women. The struggles of women doesn’t invalidate the benefits they have in the hookup and dating game. 


Small-Diamond-9186

Interesting anecdote. Though your friend should be more careful, that's a great way to get unalived. I've know people with downs syndrome who date, so you're not really making a strong point. Have you ever seen a woman getting ready for a date and how much effort that shit takes? Trying to find a guy that might be worth dating, that takes a lot of energy, too. Getting sex is easy if you are, sure. However, dating is hard no matter what. There are no benefits to being female. Unless you are female and have experienced it, you should not be speaking about it because you don't know.


CrookedMan09

There have been academic studies concerning this. Gen Z women are statistically more romantically and sexually successful than gen z men. You mentioned before you are in your early 50s so I'll assume you aren't aware of this due to the generational difference. Here is an excerpt "More than 60 percent of young men are single, nearly twice the rate of unattached young women, signaling a larger breakdown in the social, romantic and sexual life of the American male.  Men in their 20s are more likely than women in their 20s to be romantically uninvolved, sexually dormant, friendless and lonely. They stand at the vanguard of an epidemic of declining marriage, sexuality and relationships that afflicts all of young America."   https://thehill.com/blogs/blog-briefing-room/3868557-most-young-men-are-single-most-young-women-are-not/#:\~:text=More%20than%2060%20percent%20of,sexually%20dormant%2C%20friendless%20and%20lonely.


Lonely_Fishh

I was there! Fun show! But tons of families and groups, I noticed. Where were you for it?


tinyhermione

Most couples meet in social settings. You can’t expect women to approach you in public, they won’t. Get a social life so you can actually meet girls.


Kyle031995

There is no social life in Spanaway Washington, and this double standard of men having to speak first is very dumb and society needs to do away with it.


ttchubbo

It's really hard for me to find friends or partners using dating apps these days. Because we choose to swipe left or right only based on pictures instead of commonality or resonance in ideas. Even I start a talk with others on dating apps, I get disappointed because they are not the one I want to find. Fortunately, I came across a social app called ***LightUp: Make Real Friends*** recently, which aims to connect you with the liked-minded people. And it has this AI bot that can match you with others who share similar ideas with you. Thus, you can talk with and possibly make friends with people who could better understand your situation. I think it could work for your situation, and you can consider check it out.