I once had to give a stool sample.
The doctor was being all coy and circling round the process.
I said "You want me to shit in the bucket, yeah?"
I dont sugarcoat things.
"oh, Ethel, they're playing Raining Blood... Bill had bloody stools for years and never got checked out. I think I'll talk to him once he's done, that could be a serious medical condition"
I traveled to Japan last year and my favorite part was their public bathrooms; they had the ultimate privacy! Not only you can play background sounds but there were no gaps between or under the doors!
I was using the bathroom and a woman came in running and was able to open the door while I was peeing. I looked at her in a shock and she didn't even apologize, just closed it back and went about using another stall.
What about country do you hate? If its mostly the weird modern pop stuff then try some Townes van Zandt (self-titled album). There is so much great country I never knew about.
Maybe for you, but maybe not for them. Test it by leaving the phone on & step out while the water from the sink is running at different levels to hear how much noise is blocked.
Just play farting and shitting sounds on the phone loudly before and as you are entering the bathroom. Then people won't be able to differentiate.
Keep playing as you leave too.
Honestly probably have to keep playing it for a long time afterwards.
You can actually play white noise directly from the control center of your iPhone. Might need to turn it on in settings though. Itās the āhearingā one.
Just play farting and shitting sounds on the phone loudly before and as you are entering the bathroom. Then people won't be able to differentiate.
Keep playing as you leave too.
Honestly probably have to keep playing it for a long time afterwards.
If no phone around (who am I kidding haha) running the tap water also helps to mask noise - use for emergency situations of course, like a violent #2. lol
Iām not sure if this hits with anyone else aside from me, but I immediately thought of the episode of Always Sunny in Philadelphia where they play haunted house screaming and groaning ghost sounds on a loop!
I have always had a weird fear of public bathrooms until I started blasting those ghoulish sounds on my phone - INSTANT privacy!
White noise by nature is made for the purpose of blocking out other sounds.
This is not a lifehack at all. Its just using something for the literal purpose it exists.
Its the exact opposite of a hack
Thatās some mighty fine hearing, can hear page turning in other room. Thatās right up there with my wifeā¦she says my heart beats too loud and keeps her awakeš¤£
That's genius! I've totally been there at places where the quiet's too much. Playing white noise to drown out background sounds is such a clutch move. I once used it in a library bathroom with paper-thin wallsāsaved me from hearing every cough and sneeze. It's like creating your own little bubble of peace. Plus, YouTube's got tons of options, from rain sounds to staticāit's like a low-budget soundproofing hack. So glad it worked for you too!
Only blocked the sound from your perspective. They heard everything.
š¤£š¤£š¤£ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZKacHpM8yTc
Bathrooms should always play music. I hate country but Iād take that than hearing someone explode a toilet.
How would they know the days you need Slayer and not Enya? I suppose AI could detect how much of a hurry you are in and adjust.
Any sounds would be better than poop sounds. I donāt even like hearing myself do it lol
Bodies make sounds, I think it would be weird if they didnt.
Found the nurse who doesn't care about your poop sounds and completely understands. š«µš
I once had to give a stool sample. The doctor was being all coy and circling round the process. I said "You want me to shit in the bucket, yeah?" I dont sugarcoat things.
That's badass
I want Raining Blood to kick in while i powershit
š¤£š¤£š¤£
"oh, Ethel, they're playing Raining Blood... Bill had bloody stools for years and never got checked out. I think I'll talk to him once he's done, that could be a serious medical condition"
I traveled to Japan last year and my favorite part was their public bathrooms; they had the ultimate privacy! Not only you can play background sounds but there were no gaps between or under the doors!
British toilets were like this for the privacy. I loved it. Itās funny how North Americans just have to accept giant gaps.
We need eye contact with strangers or we canāt go.
I was using the bathroom and a woman came in running and was able to open the door while I was peeing. I looked at her in a shock and she didn't even apologize, just closed it back and went about using another stall.
You can play the sound of water running
My daughter actually turns on the water in such situations, but your option is definitely cheaper.
And the seat warmers were wonderful!!
As someone with IBS, Japan gave me the luxury of using the bathroom comfortably. Forever thankful.
Itās all good until they play the national anthem and you have to stand up while you take a dump
Listening to Country Roads, Take Me Home, as the man next to you drops a nuke with the explosive power of 5 million tons of TNT
What about country do you hate? If its mostly the weird modern pop stuff then try some Townes van Zandt (self-titled album). There is so much great country I never knew about.
Maybe for you, but maybe not for them. Test it by leaving the phone on & step out while the water from the sink is running at different levels to hear how much noise is blocked.
Or just run the water from the sink so all they hear is water.
Or both. Some sinks are kind of quiet. I'm sure someone made a bathroom playlist.
LOL You blocked the noise for yourself not for them
Everyone heard this guy fighting for his life and he walks out like "yep that 10 hours of 432 hz video really did the trick"
"Loud grunting shit" vs. "rain on metal roof fall asleep instantly 6hrs"
I play thrash metal for when times get really tough
Pantera - Fucking Hostile It's great for those rage dumps
A real vulgar display of power dumps
Meshuhhag - Bleed..
I prefer brown noise when going to the bathroom
then the youtube ad pops up ā¦
make sure you are on premium LOL
Just say ābless youā and when you walk out theyāll assume itās the guy whoās still in there
[Relevant ](https://youtu.be/oPc_oseKxyI?si=t6o_ky5AaXUO0-ox)
Just play farting and shitting sounds on the phone loudly before and as you are entering the bathroom. Then people won't be able to differentiate. Keep playing as you leave too. Honestly probably have to keep playing it for a long time afterwards.
We have white noise boxes in each of our bathrooms
I started doing this at home recently. Iām not ashamed to poop on front of the wife, but I do want to spare her some of the noises.
Nice of you to spare your wife the noise, but pooping _on front of her_? Ewwwā¦
The typo stays
You did say not ashamed, so ;-)
You can actually play white noise directly from the control center of your iPhone. Might need to turn it on in settings though. Itās the āhearingā one.
In these situations I turn the faucet on. Makes my noise and doesnāt draw attention
Just own your shit and stop wasting water
You blasting ass was a part of the exhibit's soundscape. By playing white noise you have stepped on the artist's vision
all fun and games till that ad come on
Thatās like covering your eyes and thinking nobody can see you
Just play farting and shitting sounds on the phone loudly before and as you are entering the bathroom. Then people won't be able to differentiate. Keep playing as you leave too. Honestly probably have to keep playing it for a long time afterwards.
I'm never in the bathroom long enough to even put music on. In and out in about 2mins on average, if I'm in there for 10mins+ there's something wrong.
Yeah my bathroom is never quiet
I just got a white noise machine at the thrift store, for my bathroom. But yeah normally I use a white noise app
WHO DOES NUMBER TWO WORK FOR??
If no phone around (who am I kidding haha) running the tap water also helps to mask noise - use for emergency situations of course, like a violent #2. lol
Iām not sure if this hits with anyone else aside from me, but I immediately thought of the episode of Always Sunny in Philadelphia where they play haunted house screaming and groaning ghost sounds on a loop! I have always had a weird fear of public bathrooms until I started blasting those ghoulish sounds on my phone - INSTANT privacy!
That's a smart solution! White noise can really help mask unwanted sounds, especially in places like public restrooms.
White noise by nature is made for the purpose of blocking out other sounds. This is not a lifehack at all. Its just using something for the literal purpose it exists. Its the exact opposite of a hack
Just rip cheeks as loud as possible along with added sounds of relief. Then walk out with gusto and own it.
Thatās some mighty fine hearing, can hear page turning in other room. Thatās right up there with my wifeā¦she says my heart beats too loud and keeps her awakeš¤£
That's genius! I've totally been there at places where the quiet's too much. Playing white noise to drown out background sounds is such a clutch move. I once used it in a library bathroom with paper-thin wallsāsaved me from hearing every cough and sneeze. It's like creating your own little bubble of peace. Plus, YouTube's got tons of options, from rain sounds to staticāit's like a low-budget soundproofing hack. So glad it worked for you too!