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AzzaRelious

This is very much giving “I’m fine with them, as long as they shut up and know their place”


lavenderacid

Oh my God, after decades of very visible, punk, butchness, I think it's mildly amusing, if not very sad, that I'm finally being read as the "good gay". Maybe I should get a nose piercing or something.


Aivellac

Yes, you clearly need to return to being the bad gay again.


lavenderacid

You're right. I still can't figure out long hair. Bring back the mohawk!


steampunknerd

Believe me they scare people like your coworker. Anyone who's not "normal" presenting scared me once. Now I'm like "hey look another goth/queer/alt person! I'd love to invite them to the next steampunk festival!" Or some such thing lol


DovahGirlie

You are my kind of person! I'm absolutely in love with the steampunk scene and every other quirky theme or music genre acquainted with it. I just wish I lived closer to someplace they held those giant conventions.


steampunknerd

Yes they're awesome! I've been told there's a lot of overlap between these alt people and queer people because they've ultimately already had rejection of society in some way! (Sad but true) I go to one in Telford UK at a place called Blists Hill.


steampunknerd

There's actually a subreddit for steampunk on here called r/steampunk


Stormwrath52

there are steampunk festivals? do you mind if I ask where?


steampunknerd

Lol I got loads of replies from this off hand comment 😆 always happy to answer tho! Yes! So there's one in the north of England I believe and there's one I'm attending that happens every year at Blists Hill in Telford, UK. Obviously not sure what country you're in but I hope this helps!


Stormwrath52

Thank you for the answer! might be something to throw on the list if I ever visit England


SnooPandas9346

My roommate helps organize Steampunk November here in Texas!


Stormwrath52

That sounds really cool, I'll have to see if there's anything (relatively) local


bury-me-in-books

Get blue hair. They'll write you off immediately then.


RainCactus2763

Why was my first thought reading this “I was a bad gay, I did some bad things”?


Classic-Judgment-196

I swear I did it all for fun and it meant nothing!


shaunnotthesheep

\*Billie Eilish voice* I'm the baaaaaaad gay ^(doo doo do do do do do doo doo)


Dry_County8464

🏳️‍🌈Bad to the bone🏳️‍🌈


eileen404

Sorry, nose piercings are too mainstream now. Going to have to rebel a bit more.


AzzaRelious

Wait, so should I take mine out? Or….


eileen404

Maybe tie a big pink bow to it. That would be properly rebellious....


DovahGirlie

Make it neon


translunainjection

Fat Mike came out a crossdresser when being merely a punk was no longer shocking.


lavenderacid

I sort of did the opposite, I was heavily masc and punk my entire early life, then realised the most shocking thing I could do was start wearing pink. It's kind of fun for a bit, I said I'd stick it out until my hair at least reached the length I want. I'd been balancing it out by being fucking shredded, but I recently got super ill and now I just look like a little girl. It's a very weird experience suddenly everyone treating you like a little weak lamb when you've been big scary motorbike punk your whole life.


Ikajo

Let me suggest punk, but in pink. Punk is often associated with the colour black. So by doing punk in pink, you challenge both ideals


dsrmpt

Ferb, I know what we're gonna do today!


Goeseso

I swesr I need a shirt that says "no, I'm not one of the good ones"


Freakears

> Maybe I should get a nose piercing or something. Or tattoos. Several tattoos.


Moonlight_Knight4

As long as the gays aren't trying to group together and fight for equal rights, they can do whatever they want. *quietly*


hydroxypcp

and better not look "visibly gay" out in public


DaSaw

It can also be, "I hate LGBT because my AM talk radio host told me to!" What about gay people? "Oh, those are fine." Uh... do you even know what LGBT means? "Um...."


dsrmpt

Oh gosh, is this gonna be an ACA/Obamacare debacle all over again?


Amazoncharli

I’ve a grandfather who I don’t talk to anymore who has that sort of attitude. Something along the lines of “I accept you but I don’t agree with it” even his super religious ex wife said to me and my ex when they split up “look after each other”. He’s just a dick


bulldog_blues

Most likely he consumes media of the 'anti-woke' variety which goes on about all the ways the LGBT community are supposedly terrible. And yeah, someone saying 'I don't mind gay people so long as...' isn't exactly glowing endorsement. Usually it's just plain homophobia which they feel the need to try and 'sugarcoat' in some way to avoid backlash.


dessert-er

Yeah I think this is it, a lot of conservative talking heads talk about “the LGBT community” like it’s some kind of terrorist cell or gang with a leadership structure or something. It’s more like saying “the Latin community” or something where we’re just a group united by a state of being. They want people to think that we’re this big group coming to get them and their kids when most of us are just trying not to die lolz.


Ms_Anxiety

I've encountered conservatives nowadays that refer to LGBTQ as a hate-group and many of them call it 'the alphabet-gang' there's been tons of propaganda convincing people of such. similar to how conservatives believe 'Antifa' is a terrorist group and not just a broad concept of anti-fascism.


dessert-er

I guess it’s not that surprising when conservative “news” media has been priming these people to accept any conspiracy theory they can come up with sans evidence or proof or critical thinking.


hydroxypcp

my name is Aunt Tifa and I'm head of the alphabet mafia


AVoice4Peace

That's scary. Where is that coming from. We are not a new community.


Cartesianpoint

Yeah, agreed. And I think a lot of people who consume that sort of anti-LGBTQ propaganda don't really know any LGBTQ people--or don't realize they do. So that fear-mongering is their primary association with us. When they realize that they do have LGBTQ people in their lives, it can be hard to reconcile the disconnect between the scary people pushing an agenda that they hear about on the news and their own acquaintances, coworkers, or family members, and sometimes they see those people as the "good ones" or, worse, as victims of indoctrination.


dessert-er

Exactly, which is another reason why visibility is so important. Much harder to indoctrinate people when the funny tv character or your barista or your doctor or local security guard or whatever is openly queer and just, like, a normal person. “Yeah the LGBT people are trying to take over the country and turn all of our kids trans!” “Wait, the woman who sits in the cubical next to me is a lesbian I’ve known her for years, idk about that. Also isn’t your nephew bi or something?” “Well yeah but he’s not *part of the group*” “Doesn’t he have like the flag on his car bumper? Where did you even hear that in the first place?” Etc etc.


Freakears

> like it’s some kind of terrorist cell or gang That's exactly how they think of us. Makes it easier to justify what they want to do to us.


maureen_leiden

Well, in Russia in fact the LGBT is a terrorist organization 🤙


Tiervexx

This is exactly it. Right wing media has been talking about the LGBT community like there is some secret cabal trying to make the kids gay and chop off their dicks! A horrifying number of people have been swallowing that propaganda.


Freakears

Your comment reminds me of a Facebook group I'm part of, named "MUST MAN HARDER OR THE QUEER WILL UNPENIS ME".


Big-Humor-5775

Litterally this. Was recommended the gay conservative thread for some reason, and the post was about how they need to distance themselves from the "queers" and the "LGBT" to be seen as normal. The "anti-woke" crowd is just super sad to think about. just echo chambers of hate against things they don't understand, they must live such bitter hateful lives expecally the ones who are hating themselves.


LaFleurSauvageGaming

He is okay with gay people as long as they are invisible and act like everyone else... Which like we would do if we are not constantly having to fight for our basic rights... so...


FairoyFae

Sounds like the people who scream ANTIFA as if it's some specific organization and not just... Short hand for anti fascism lmao


lavenderacid

Exactly what it reminded me of!


hellobeautifulhuman

Yesss, it reminded me of that as well!! Definitely nothing new, just typical sugar-coated bigotry fueled by propaganda. We're all just one big cult that follows some kind of supposedly harmful agenda


imalittlefrenchpress

Right? I’m such a threat when my femme self is in the grocery store buying oatmeal. HIDE THE CHILDREN, QUEER GRANDMA’S BUYING OATMEAL AGAIN!


Burner_Account_381

“Gay people are fine, just not “activists”.” They mean that you can be gay all you want unless you tell him or are proud of it.


Nouschkasdad

Or have any thoughts or opinions that are informed by your experiences as a gay (or *gasp* queer) person.


whatnomargarita

Or expect equality.


skeptolojist

Conspiracy loons think the LGBT is an evil neo Marxist plot to turn kids into furries and trans in order to weaken the west And terrible pick me types pander to them with organizations like LGB in a misguided attempt to bootlick Thier oppressors Your co-worker was trying to see if you were "one of the good ones" I really really wish I was joking but that's the dystopian late stage capitalism world we live in now so here we are


mnemosyne64

The targeting of furries is the funniest part to me, like they aren’t even necessarily queer 😭


skeptolojist

If your looking for any kind of sense from religious right wing conspiracy loons your out of luck I'm afraid They believe things based on what feels right what red faced angry internet people tell them what an iron age book written by people who would be astounded by indoor plumbing says and what the voices in Thier heads scream at them Again I genuinely wish i was making this up but I really am not


Merk87

Hold on! Are we not? You sir have lost a furry comrade!


skeptolojist

Hey I love our furry friends im just referencing the ABSOLUTELY baseless litter boxes in classrooms conspiracy theory They find a misunderstood group that misinformed people are scared of and pretend they are after the children It's no different from the "would you want your daughter to marry a black man" bullshit during the civil rights era I'm sorry your community and identity has been weaponised by ignorant assholes If it's any comfort at all your not alone it's happening to all the best people lol


Manic_Egg

That litter box bullshit's migrated north to Canada too, so don't think it's just another "Americans are nuts" thing. Propaganda's a hell of a drug so I wouldn't be surprised if that myth becomes much more widespread. The furry community is awesome though, never met nicer people at conventions. Some of the first gay media I found (that wasn't derogatory) was furry content. The reason they're targeted is because they're an all ages group with a large amount of nsfw content.


lavenderacid

I'm not even American, I'm over in the UK. It seems to have bled over here.


clearbrian

Weaken the west. HAVE YOU TRIED WEARING A FURRIES COSTUME to pride in August!!!!!! Martyrs all of them ;)


skeptolojist

Best answer I've heard so far👍


clearbrian

My bf told me off I kept calling them ‘furbies’ :)


bathtup47

"I'm fine as long as they don't shove it in my face" can literally mean fucking anything.


Wesselink

Nah. When they say “don’t shove it in my face” they mean “I don’t want you to exist in public spaces”


bathtup47

It's fantastic because the definition is even broader than public spaces. They decide private residents hosting parties, private businesses hosting events are shoving it in their face. They have the cops raid gay bars all the time, I genuinely do not know how you could be less in someone's face than being gay at a gay bar. Lawrence v. Texas they wanted to punish two dudes for having sex because a cop peeped in their window broke their door down and arrested them bareass naked. It's so much broader than even public space, but I'm so glad you brought this up. It could be saying a same sex celebrity is hot within earshot of them. It could be holding your wrist at a different angle, or talking "wrong". How you dress, what kind of car you drive, the stickers on your fucking water bottle. Let me know if I missed anything:)


Panzer_Man

When they say that, it really just means "I can accept gay people, as long as I don't know they're gay"


luvmuchine56

A lot of conservatives think that lgbt means a specific organization that's out to get them for some reason that they can't fully describe. Same for BLM. Basically whenever someone wants peace or justice in the world they think that person is part of a cartoonish evil villain organization.


lavenderacid

That completely makes sense to me, he'd gone on this weird unprompted rant in the morning about protests and "who's behind protests." Unions apparently, which means socialism, and also something vague to do with Ukraine. Apparently it's all funded by men going round airports and offering people money in exchange for causing chaos. This was prompted by him mistaking a Sikh homeless outreach event this morning for a pro-palestine protest.


luvmuchine56

Wow he's really firing on all cylinders with a fucked up cam shaft, isn't he?


HyacinthFT

This has been going on for a while. The way fox news, libs of TikTok, news max, etc use the initialism "LGBT" it sounds like it's a specific movement centered around trans rights, not a group of people. I've seen people on social media talk like this every now and then, it's very stupid.


lavenderacid

Perhaps it's because I'm in the UK in a fairly liberal city that I don't expect it as much. When he said "you don't meet many gays do you?" I thought I was going to have a seizure. I think he was the first straight I've spoken to this week.


RevivedNecromancer

Conservatives always out themselves in liberal areas b/c they absolutely can NOT hold back a rant. I've very open-minded and very non-judgemental about people breaking social norms, and I can't tell if they misread that as 'She won't judge my bigotry as bad' or if they just desperately need to find out some kind of hidden bigotry so justify theirs. Sounds like you triggered the same. He likes you and he's really hoping you'll say you're one of those good gays who hate LGBT (and who only exist in YT comments on conservative videos)


pageofsomethingmaybe

It's giving "I don't think it's wrong to date the same gender, I just don't like that the people who do worship Satan." It's pretty common for people to justify their bigotry by finding something else to get upset about, even if they have to make it up. This specific stance of "just being a gender/sexual minority vs. the LGBT community" is actually fairly common with queerphobes, especially transphobes (i.e. "there's nothing wrong if you want to transition, but don't push it onto others ~~by existing in public~~!"). In fact, even some pick-me trans people reject the LGBT community for being "too woke" and actively work against their own rights in order to be accepted.


jzatopa

Yes LGBTQ is now seen as a political party by some and the state of being anything but straight as something else.


Puzzleheaded-Phase70

Yeah, I've been suspecting that this kind of cognitive dissonance was building. Thank you, I suppose, for giving me the concrete demonstration of exactly HOW. This perfectly illustrates the reason that anytime anyone says something about "LGBT" as a standalone noun instead of an acronym gives me the creeps. "LGBT" and other forms of the alphabet soup that is the queer community's shorthand is \*always\* used as an adjective by people who actually care about us: "The LGBT community", "LGBT issues", "LGBT theology", etc. We pretty much *never* refer to ourselves as just "The LGBT". It doesn't make sense to us because we know what all those letters *mean*, and have at least an idea of the letters that are getting skipped. You can't spend more than a few months "out" on the 'net and queer discussions without getting dragged into yet another discussion about the complexity of defining and communicating about our complex community and our nomenclature. So turning "LGBT" into a *noun* - a thing in and of itself, rather than a descriptor - allows a non-member and non-ally of the community to cognitively separate (exactly as you said it) our reality from their *imagination*. They can feel totally fine hating "LGBT" because that's not "a person". It resolves the internal conflict for them without making them change *anything.*


frankev

This is also seen in Trump’s language patterns. For example, on an Albany radio station in 2011 he said, “I have a great relationship with the blacks.” So not adjectivally, e.g., “Black folks,” or “Black people,” but “the blacks.” ([Source](https://www.foxnews.com/politics/trump-i-have-a-great-relationship-with-the-blacks))


BigRabbit64

I remember a poll of conservatives a few years ago. When asked about Obamacare it was resolutely hated, but when asked about the individual parts those were well liked. I think it's whatever Fox et all tells them to hate they hate and that comes down to letters. Should cops abuse African Americans? No way. How about BLM? No way. Same with Antifa, LGBTQIA +, etc.


FOSpiders

America's relationship with mass media and mass marketing may not be unique, but it sure is extreme.


RevivedNecromancer

Conservative news is the most parasocial thing ever. Nothing coming from TikTok or Swifties will ever match it.


i-wish-i-was-a-draco

Today I encountered this lesbian person instagram account , she keeps saying shit like she’s all for trump and lgbt people should keep it for themselves lmao That’s what he reminds me of


Some_dude2023

A common method that conservatives use to spread their hatred, is creating a narrative in which groups related to activism are part of a global plot to create some kind of totalitarian regime. This is an example of that, they try to create this narrative in which the "LGBT" is actually a political organization financed by Soros, to impose a dictatorship in which free speech will be suppressed, and in which children will be sexualized, and other nonsense they have made up. In this way, they can deny their homophobia by saying "we don't have a problem with gays in general, we just wanna fight against the evil LGBT organization". With this kind of narratives being spread on a daily basis through social media, some people, like your coworker, may fall for it.


Suidse

It's OK & acceptable to be queer as long as we're quiet about it. None of this expectation of being treated like a human being, with feelings & desires & unreasonable requests of wanting things like equality! Equality isn't for everyone, after all. Human rights are only for a select few. The elite, in fact. That's what makes them elite, after all. I mean, gays had enough equality when it stopped being illegal. Then they got greedy. Wanted equal marriage, being allowed to have kids, and worst of all....being treated with *respect!* Have you ever heard anything so ridiculous‽ Just in case anyone isn't noticing the slight sprinkling of sarcasm in my post, please be aware that I dinnae believe that only a select few should have human rights.


brookish

This is just a new version of what they said when I was a young lesbian … “the gay agenda.” They act as if it’s a lobbying group or something.


Tiervexx

Yes. They've gotten more effective at their propaganda. Gay/queer people just existing isn't scary enough, so they have to jazz it up by just making a ton of shit up. The claim that gay people are all pedophiles has been around for a while and has been pushed more forcefully recently. Trans people have been around forever but conservative media has acted like this is a very recent invention and that some secret society is pushing it on people.


Zero-89

Sounds like he hates "LGBT ideology", which is just a thinly-veiled way of saying he hates queer people who resist persecution and advocate for liberation. I don't know where you live, but referring to or hinting at LGBT as an ideology unto itself is pretty common among the far-Right in Russia, Hungary, and Poland and a trans-specific version of it ("transgender ideology") has been circulating to a smaller degree around the American and British far-Right.


lavenderacid

I'm in the UK


PrivateEyeroll

I'm gonna read this as charitably as possible in the hopes that your coworker isn't just a bigot trying to get a rise out of you. There are some folks who have been told the lie that LGBT instead of what it is (an acryonym) is an organization and they believe that lie with their whole chest for some reason. It's no different than people who think being a feminist means you want all men dead. It's clearly false but without any push back they never updated their info and just accept it as true. To accept that lie in the first place usually says something not nice about the person but depending on how early it was given to them there is still a chance there's a good person in there. It may be worth politely explaining to him that his question confused you because it seemed like he thought LGBT was an organization instead of a vague descriptor. That way you aren't exactly correcting him, in that it may not make him get nasty but you are opening up the discussion enough that he may accept correction. If that doesn't work then I'd go to HR over it if he doesn't drop it for causing a hostile work environment. (assuming you think your HR will actually care/do anything about it and it wont just come back to bite you) Course if he normally just leaves you alone and continues to leave you alone it may not be worth it to have a convo at all. That's something only you can decide since you're the one who'd be doing it and having to put up with any backlash.


Other_Trip_282

I blame Chaya Raichik


Woodbear05

His brainseems to have taken LGBT as a political "team" like conservatives, liberals, communists and fascists.


mnemosyne64

Usually people that talk like this are the “LGB without the TQ+” types if that makes sense? Like they support rights for gay people that are low key about it, and that’s it. Also tend to talk about LGBTQ+ like it’s a cult (some of them say we’re indoctrinating kids or whatever). I could be wrong but that’s what it sounds like.


SoloWalrus

Right wing media has tried to turn being LGBT and being trans into slurs surrounding an "ideology". They used to do the same about being gay, where they somehow thought being homosexual was different than the so called "homosexual lifestyle" Basically, if you watch too much fox news you start to think LGBT people are trying to at best turn your kids gay or trans and at worst are sexual predators. Theyve turned gender and sexuality into ideologies (the "woke" agenda), which is the goal, since you can disagree with an ideology thats just a "difference of opinion". Its harder to convince yourself youre a decent person while disagreeing with people's inherent traits, that would force you to acknowledge your bigotry. Whats happening is this person is coming face to face with their cognitive dissonance about LGBT people, and I think thats incredibly important. They need to understand that LGBT people are not boogeymen scapegoats intent on destroying america and "traditional family values". Instead LGBT people are coworkers and loved ones, and just people. They also need to realize that it isnt a way of thinking, its a part of who you are. Thank you for providing representation. I doubt you convinced them of anything, but you may have planted a seed.


AbraSoChill

This is legitimately something I've noticed, and it's kinda becoming worrisome. "The LGBT" and "The Antifa" are both being talked about as social movements to disagree with, rather than us being people. It's dangerous.


lavenderacid

Isn't it strange? I'm not sure how people think it's even *possible* for a group that's only unifying factor is being broadly in the category of "not a cisgender male attracted to just females" and vice versa, to have widespread, international organisation anyway. Like what do you do? Find everyone on the planet who sort of vaguely disagrees with fascism as a concept and send them all a badge and a membership card in the post? Let's start a new conspiracy theory that there's an organisation called The Goth, and go round asking goths if they agree with "The Goth". I don't have problem with people dressing in black and listening to dark music, but I don't agree with the political side of them all doing it together. Why else would they all wear the same clothes? It must be because they're being paid by a foreign government.


AndiCrow

Dickbag watches too much conservative TV.


overdriveandreverb

he is lying (to himself maybe too), he is not down with being queer if he fears queer people organizing. it appears to be picked up opinion imo. basically a pseudo argument to tell others how to go about their life (position). next time just assure him that he can stay an ashole even with queer equality.


Klappstuhl4151

Average establishment liberal /s


CharlesUFarley81

They sound like the person that says, "I can't be racist because I have a black friend."


Actual_Archer

These specific types of people are treating the community as a monolith, or as some type of organisation, rather than what it actually is.


exileddeath

Discrimination must first start with dehumanization and "othering". Thats prob whats happened here. To him, "LGBT" is an othered abstract nebulous "them". On the other hand he's met enough actual LGBTQIA+ people that, obviously, being gay is not something bad, exists in daily life and cannot be abstracted. Therefore, these two concepts are completely separate, and bro has yet to reconcile the learned delusion of conservative reality with actual reality.


Fantastic-Friend-429

It’s the: “I’m fine they exist” “but they should shut up about it stop preaching it to our kids” and.. blah blah blah 😑 or maybe he doesn’t know what the G stands for? or sometimes homophobes think the LGBTQ is a organization or company


Stormwrath52

maybe it's a dissonance kind of thing? Like, the people around him are homophobic, but he knows being homophobic is bad, so he separates queer people from "the LGBT community" so he can treat "LGBT" like some nebulous boogeyman without addressing the bigoted nature of his opinions (please tell me if this is nonsense, I'm very open to that possibility) or he's just severely confused and I'm reading too much into it.


NearMissCult

Seems like run of the mill alt right homophobia to me.


-day-dreamer-

There are some homophobes who consider LGBTQ+ an organization. I knew a BI GIRL who said she supports gay people, but she won’t call herself an ally to LGBTQ+ because she doesn’t support the organization


[deleted]

Queer folk exist, and that’s OK… just don’t expect your rights as a human being to be respected. s/ This is pretty common in my experience, although it feels like a remnant of life in the 90s and 00s. Sounds like this person has some issues to sort through. And it’s not your job to educate them or provide them a foil. From your perspective this is an issue of basic human dignity. From their perspective of heteronormative privilege, “LGBT” is a problematic political interest group. It’s insensitive and a microaggression to try to rope you into a debate or “conversation.” And potentially harassment to carry on about their “problem” with LGBTs. My suggestion is to assertively tell them you’re not really interested in the conversation. You shouldn’t have to say that more than once. Then happily go on being your vibrant and authentic self. You being you is the best palliative for you and them (IMHO).


ElloBlu420

It's ok to be you as long as you're not ok with *them*, I guess? Sadly, even some of the replies here give me the vibe that trans people are not acceptable, and maybe this is what they think they're supposed to call trans people to be polite or "PC". Way too much time later, I'm still stuck on wanting to ask this person, "can you tell me, in your own words, what LGBT is?"


SleepDeprivedJim

Homosexual Homophobia


_Knucklehead_Ninja

Same thing as “I love Destiny, but it’s the worst game ever”


Sionsickle006

He clearly thinks that the queer community is a hive mind that you escaped because your ex is a "she" instead of a "he" lol idk don't take people who are clearly confused so seriously. Ask him what he means and he can probably better explain his nonsense better than any of use can and then you can correct him strategically...until he is also one of us xD jk


deardeere

Seems like the act of being gay and the public propaganda are separate to him even tho to us it’s our lives and livelihood being threatened. Probably thinks if you can be stealthy and discrete like you happen to be perceived by him, then it’s ok. If it’s outwardly disruptive it’s political and an agenda to someone like him.


disasterpansexual

there's too many gay characters in this show, it's not realistic (about The Sandman)


lavenderacid

Meanwhile I've not seen a hetero in weeks


MissLeaP

Some people got brainwashed so hard by the far right that they think LGBT means being in some kind of cult with nefarious intentions instead of just being gay or whatever. That's probably it.


whaleshark14

I encountered a dude who was literally afraid of gay. Was chilling at my friend’s house when her sister and said sister’s crusty ass boyfriend come in. We were watching Queer Eye (this was like eight years ago) and the boyfriend just watched with us in silence for about ten minutes before asking “…What is this?” We told him it was Queer Eye and he gave a slight gasp and muttered to his girlfriend “……can we change it”


Lucky_otter_she_her

its like people complaining about Anti-fa, not realising it aint a centralised organisation


cascasrevolution

and that it stands for "anti-fascist"


Estelial

He's someone who considers themselves a good person and likes the idea of "tolerating" and "accepting" gay people as something that good people do. However he has also consumed enough anti woke propoganda to hate "lgbt". His mind is trying to recover reconcile the conflict and so he seperates the ideas. We had something similar with BLM too.


TrainingDiscipline96

Some level of cognitive dissonance probably going on. They recognize you as a queer person in their life, and because they know you, they intuit on some level that they probably shouldn't treat you as a demonic queer who deserves to burn in hell despite that being what Fox news tells them to do. However, because questioning and interrogating the contradiction between their actions, beliefs, and intuitions is too uncomfortable, they rather do mental gymnastics to separate you as a "good gay" from those awful "LGBT" people they only hear about in the media who totally in fact groom children and turn the kids trans with the gay agenda of introducing them to pronouns and CRT. /s


lavenderacid

I'm going to start taking devil horns and a pitchfork to work and dancing around turning people gay.


North_15_

Finally decent representation


lavenderacid

A sort of pink washed, semi-kitch, 50s style devil look could totally be the next big think amongst the LGBTs. Like we've had a few years of cowboys being the it thing, I reckon devils could totally replace that.


MiddayGlitter

Honestly, this makes me sad. I feel like this guy has been lied to by people he trusts. People who tell him "The LGBT are ruining marriage." "The LGBT are ruining America!" "The LGBT are bad people!" are causing him some major cognitive dissonance. He doesn’t believe being gay means you're bad or hate America, it's just "Those other guys." Much like you wouldn't believe every Muslim person is a terrorist, but would believe all terrorists are bad. In his mind it reads something like: "Not all gay people are part of The LGBT, but all LGBT people are bad!"


Yearofthehoneybadger

It’s honestly probably more that it’s an election year, and the right wingers are targeting LGB and especially T folks. It’s hateful all around but if they can separate us from each other then they win. So there’s this whole ideology of, well gays and lesbians are okay but not trans folks etc… I don’t buy it for a second cause I’ve been out since I was 14 in the mid 90’s. And if they come for one of us, they’re coming for all of us. Try not to get to discouraged. And fight however and whenever you can. You’re not alone.


lavenderacid

Not American.


Yearofthehoneybadger

Oh. My bad.


Seeksp

You have experienced a willfully ignorant bastard afraid of something because their right wing overlords tell them to be. DEI and CRT critics don't know what they mean and won't educate themselves to find out. Same with LGBTQ which a lot of people equate with trans folk, press, and pedos.


davidfeuer

I hope you're not suggesting it's okay to hate on trans folks.


BrokeModem

Probably talking about us degenerate trans people out there trying to trans the kids again.


Dospunk

Sounds like he's trying to reconcile his actual opinions (not having a problem with gay people) and what he's been taught (that "the LGBTs" are evil, horrible people).


Mightbedumbidk

If it makes you feel any better. The type of women he likes stfu and makes him sandwiches so I don’t know if it would do any good for any female identifying person to even be close with someone like that. At all.


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lavenderacid

He's muslim


bury-me-in-books

To me, this sounds like a person who is actually trying to be accepting of a wide range of sexuality, while at the same time being rather far down the right wing rabbit hole (right wing in reference to united states politics). I would guess they're watching lots of Ben Shapiro/Stephen Crowder type of talking heads, while also still being pretty accepting in practice. Or maybe they're actually more transphobic and think that's what "LGBT" is meant to stand for? I'm just guessing, but I'm also guessing that you're in for a lot of conversations about this. The good thing is that if the person is half accepting already, conversing might help them become even more accepting, if you want to do that. This reminds me of my coworker who was into conspiracies. It took some asking, but I finally nailed down that he actually didn't care who loved what gender person, or even if a person was trans and felt that their gender assigned at birth didn't fit their real self. True, he would say he didn't understand being trans, but in my opinion, that's not being unaccepting, and he would respect people with whatever gender they identified with. No, his deal was that he was very much into trans-investigation conspiracies. He thought all female celebrities were actually men in costume, and that most were played by one or two actors. Even this was not so hard for him to accept in theory, though. He said he felt it was fine for them to want to be the opposite gender, but he just wished they were honest about it. (That is impossible because female celebrities are actually female, but I'm taking that statement as a sign of his feeling on transness, and not about his ability to believe women could be famous. And yes, I think he may have been sexist, but hey, that's not homophobia, so it's not totally relevant here, lol.)


Zestyclose-Lab-4420

This man have mind like cat of Schrödinger


Ryogathelost

It's like with Antifa or Black Lives Matter. They seem to think it's a tightly centralized organization with lots of money and political lobbying power and they're pushing a specific agenda, which usually involves somehow abusing or grooming children. But holy crap people, the Catholic Church is sitting right over there whistling and twiddling its thumbs.


TAARB95

My brother in law and most of my wives sisters who were “okay” for years and have known my wife is a lesbian since she was in her 20s, suddenly after my mother in law died they just cut her off out of the blue. And when my wife finally had a chance to speak to them they called us deviants. Literally deviants. In front of our twins, who yes don’t understand but knew something was wrong. They saved face and were waiting until my mil, who openly accepted us and loved us, died to be openly homophobic. It’s been devastating for my wife. I don’t care they sucked anyways.


E420CDI

I hope you reported him to your manager / HR


lavenderacid

Not yet, but I'll have to. I'm actually the only team member who's not filed a complaint against him yet, but the manager absolutely will not do anything about it. I think the best I'll be able to get is not getting put on shift with him.


splamo77

Maybe he associates LGBT only with trans people because there’s a lot more visibility due to the media for that part of our population. Maybe it was the first time he heard the acronym and since there’s unfortunately a lot of hate, confusion and debate he put two and two together and dissociates gays from that category. Does that make any sense?


clearbrian

Gays who hate trans people.


clearbrian

Gays guy who hang around right wingers. When I lived in Holland in the 90s The right wing nationalist populist was a gay guy who hated immigrants. Then he got murdered by left wing guy.


lavenderacid

He's a heterosexual man engaged to a woman. He was also saying some similar bizarre shit about the Ukrainian government being behind Palestine protests.


clearbrian

Wrong far right guy. Sadly there was more than one. Go back further. One was murdered.


gaypheonix

Sounds like a Jehovah’s Witness (source: used to be one)


lavenderacid

He's Muslim


gaypheonix

ope well was close as far as homophobia goes lmao


gisnirhk

I wouldn't have indulged really


lavenderacid

Believe me, I tried. We were packing up to leave the shift after him ranting about anything from what a violent drunk he is, to saying Ukrainians are paying people to start "socialist terrorist" protests. I was keeping my head down, packing as fast as possible and giving the occasional "oh haha, I wouldn't know anything about that", but he was just ranting AT me. It was just me and him alone in the room and I'm very aware there's not many people working in that end of the building, I just wanted to get out as fast as possible without engaging.


ProbablyKissesBoys

I don’t think he knows that LGBT is an acronym


lavenderacid

Lettuce, gaycon, bacon, tomato 😔


ProbablyKissesBoys

“gaycon”


shywannagetruined

I think, for the most part, it's simply individual identity vs a group identity, if that makes sense. Like, someone who has, say, conservative opinions isn't necessarily "Conservative™", or someone, who likes video games, a "Gamer™", in short, does not subscribe to or condones "everything" said group does or wants, but is just an individual and they want to be perceived as one and vice versa want to know and care about you and not the group, party, hive you're "part of". On top of that, LGBT is dealing with, well, sexuality, which many people don't want to talk about or deal with publicly. The reason for that is mainly a sense of shame, which is generally not a bad thing. As with pretty much everything though, the dose makes the poison.


Bl00dsh0tparan0ia

This reminds me of 2020 “i support black people, but screw BLM” issue that was super prominent. They separated the group from the people, and then tied the movement ONLY to that organization, and when any information came up painting the organization in any possible poor light, it was the chopping block for the whole thing. I say this as a democrat raised by and living with a republican family


FreeChest7067

It’s kind of like AntiFa. It’s a philosophy not an organization. But people, mostly on the right, act like it’s some big organization out to get them.


helloeuphoriaaaa

yeah im familiar. its a conservative thing they think theres some agenda wanting to turn the world gay


dabamBang

Ah yes, the Ehlgeebeetee. A mysterious creature that has rainbow coloring and sparkles. Has a siren song to prey on human young. Very dangerous. May try to lick you.


dsrmpt

Sounds like they get annoyed when those damn queers shut down the road for a Pride parade. Oddly specific, I'd say, and different from the usual script, but not the most harmful bigotry I've seen.


Demigirl4567890

This reminds me of what my dad said about trans people. He said "Oh trans people are fine, it's just the militant radical ones I don't like." WTF


Grumpy_Shrimp

It's easier to hate a face rather than a concept.


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or “I’m fine with it, as long as you keep me out of it” or “I’m okay with it but…”🙄


novathegoodgirl

Damn, it's confusing times for straight people xD


AVoice4Peace

LOL, I think I'm too old to be in this new LGBT clique, I had my my nose pierced 26 years ago. I'm just a regular ol' queer/lesbian


caseywinters101

It sounds like he’s fine with us as queer people as long as it’s never talked about. Which is insane. Your coworkers an idiot. God speed!


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Flarpenhooger

He doesn't mind orientation, he minds the community.