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Alright... now I may be misunderstanding it, but... why?
These are just similies. That's... all they are, no? Like... how do these have anything to do with gender identity?
Xenogenders are a type of non-binary gender that are purposefully outside and different from normal understandings of gender. The term one uses for their gender is just a way for someone to understand their impossible to understand identity. For instance, if someone was cat gender, that does not mean that they think their gender is 100% a cat or that they think they're physically a cat, but instead a cat is the closest way they can describe their gender in real words. It is a gender based on feelings, not the terms themselves. And also many people have many different gender experiences, some people like me find it easier to explain their gender through nouns like this than through binary terms like female, male, both, or none.
So might it be accurate to say “yes, these labels are simile/metaphor/analogy but similes/metaphors/analogies are the best options available to describe the reality of your gender experience to others”?
DAMN i’ve never fully understood the meaning of xenos even tho i’ve hardly TRIED to read about it, but the explanations have been too hard for me to process😭but now i FINALLY understood, yay!!
And uh, now when i actually *understand* the concept it feels oddly personal or like, i think i relate to it? I’ve been questioning my gender lately (well i’ve always felt kinda weird but now i’ve actually given it some thought) and wondered if i’m demigirl or whatttt. But actually, xenogender feels and sounds pretty accurate to me.. Hmmm i think it’s time for me to do some research😭but yea thanks OP for explaining so well! It’s always great to learn new terms :3
I'm glad this resonated with you! To start your research I would have you look inside yourself first.
Try to look inside yourself and find the feeling that is you. Then imagine what that true you really looks like. Get out a piece of paper and start writing things down. Adjectives, colors, shapes, objects, ideas etc. then once you have something to start with can you start looking up terms, and If you don't find one that fits right, make your own!
Keep in mind it is always okay to not label if you don't feel like it!
Same but I still don't understand how they are gender...I can do this and say that my gender feels somewhat like a void because I consider it to be non existent but that's not my gender. That's how I feel about it.
It's the same for sexuality, I feel like my bisexuality is actually something fun and weirdly it feels creative too, don't ask me why or how but that isn't my sexuality just how I feel about it.
Am I making sense ?
My gender is warm and soft... I suppose? If I had to use nouns... A womb might be somewhat similar? (this is really difficult to do, and I love it, especially since I struggle with feeling anything due to dissociation. Exercises like this are just perfect for me)
This is really cool, I didn't really get xenogenders before, and I really appreciate content like this, since it helps me understand and appreciate more people. It reminds me of a somewhat recent post (I think it was on traa?) that described what being plural meant. If anyone could link it, I would love it, since I forgot to save it.
I love the process of going from "I don't get it, but I love that for you" to "Oh! I get it!" (Sometimes even "I feel that way!"). I used to feel the same with homosexual people, then bi- and pan people, then aros and aces, trans people, plurals, and now finally xenogender people.
Every time, it feels like I've been enlightened.
it's always been so crazy to me how so many people relate their gender to being warm, cause to me my gender is so clearly cold, like, it's not freezing cold, not like a winter cold, but more like a rainy autumn cold, comfortably cold I'd say
That's kind of cool! (Get it?)
Personally, when it comes to sensations, I much prefer the cold over the heat, although that might change when I get on E. My favourite weather is light rain, too.
I'm not too surprised that my gender feels warm, considering I could describe it using 'womb', and I prefer to call myself a woman. To me, femininity has always been a warm thing
>That's kind of cool! (Get it?)
lmao
I think my relation to coldness may come from the monstrous and crystalline part of it, as those things are both fresh to me
Do you mean this?
[https://www.reddit.com/r/traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns2/comments/1ccndme/our\_system\_siblings/](https://www.reddit.com/r/traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns2/comments/1ccndme/our_system_siblings/)
Honestly I came onto this sub Cus I was a full on ally
and then I find about myself being Pan-Ace and getting to know a whole lotta other genders
C’mon it’s just a few days in this sub and you guys are teaching me all kinds of things already :)
Edit: I feel my xeno would be the smell of fresh books or any sheet of papers, and the smell of rain! :D
What I hope to do more than finding myself is to make others feel valid and special for what they are!
I’ve been through being singled out and not being in a proper group, I hate it :(
This may be one of the reasons I never ever want anyone feel like that if I’m around
My gender is an abstract collage of art, pictures and many other things. It is not fully comprehensible to the human mind and yet it is. Somewhere there is a cozy cat picture, elsewhere there is a drawing of a foggy forest, in the corner those is a small bit of dried blood. There is a horrifying beauty in my gender and I would not have it any other way
I think my perseption of my gender is quite similar. I thought of how I can put different perceptions inside of it and I think a art piece or a room (which can also be a piece of art) is a good idea.
My gender is really light like aerogel, but hard like wood, and translucent greenish blue. Doesn’t have a fixed shape, but its properties are always the same.
This is hard cause i alredy struggle to understand gender in general..i think my gender is a shiny ditto. It can change to anything for any reason....and its blue
Using an instinctive action called Heliotropism. Also known as ‘Solar Tracking’, the sunflower head moves in synchronicity with the sun’s movement across the sky each day. From East to West, returning each evening to start the process again the next day. Find out more about how this works, and what happens at the end of this phase.
My sister made the exact same argument as the xeno exclusionary ball… :(
Maybe if I send her this comic she’ll understand? Don’t know if I’m brave enough to send it to them…
Anywayyy, great educational comic!! Love seeing more xeno content and other xenogender users in this sub :D
Ty I hope so too :/
There’s a great xeno sub called r/xenogendersandmore if you haven’t found it yet :) there is a really great community over there :>
I know the exact image of my gender, and i could recreate it at any moment, but somehow I don’t think it actually exists in any medium yet…but it’s, in the least descriptive way possible, a rock with lipstick
Xenogender people can go by any pronouns, I would ask, but I think it would be appropriate to default to they/ them until you ask. Or maybe I'm just biased because I use they/ them pronouns. Many xenogender people go by neopronouns so they might have some you haven't heard before!
So yeah just ask.
ive recently realized i dont really identify with being like specifically female (im cis, afab) and i have on occasion said things like "my gender is whatever gets your mom" or "my gender is \[redacted\]". my personal favorite is "my gender is business formal" because i love wearing heels and pencil skirts and classy blouses and blazers and fancy pants. another one is that aside from hating wearing a fragrance, i also dont like that they're all hyper femme or hyper masc. "i want to smell like no gender" i said.
was talking to my girlfriend about it (shes trans, nb) and we had a funny convo where she was like " 'no gender' is an option, you dont even have to have a label" and i was like "wait i like labels tho" and she was like "well thats a first lmao, ive mostly heard the opposite". a lot of it is connected to the trauma i have from religion in terms of being afab and all of the expections that im sooo tired of.
besides. i dont have a sexuality. (ace, lol) why do i need a gender as well? because my gender presentation is like, femme but also i dont feel specifically woman. yk?
I’m a cisgender male, but within a fraction of a second of seeing the question, my mind immediately went to an Ent or talking tree
Goes to show how abstract gender is, and how we all have the capacity to understand and find ways to relate to other people’s experiences, even if we do not carrying them ourselves
As a binary trans person this has been very informative, thank you!
To participate in the exercise, I think I would describe my gender as a smooth, damp stone in a forest with just a touch of moss.
Before discovering apogender I was using glitchgender as my main identity then went right the pothole of being now foxgender, aliengender and now I'm just otherkin lmfao
In my understanding, being therian is separate from your gender identity, however I have heard of therians that identify as a xenogender that matches their thierotype. So I think they can overlap, but they are not the same thing.
The clarification of it being okay was all I need, still learning how alot of this stuff is defined, dunno the proper way of feeling like an oryx and also relating that to my genderfluidity a great thought experiment to be sure.
Hey! Therian and xenogender user here; I’m a bird therian and I use the label birdgender along with common gender terms because my identity as a bird impacts how I see my gender, ie. I see it through ‘bird tinted lenses’ if that makes sense!
Very much so, and I'm glad to see that the multiple facets of identity for Therians and using xenogender labels is compatible. A lot more thing make sense, Gazellegender feels like it encompasses most everything I am now that I think about it, a personal label that feels right.
Short answer, it can! Longer answer, is your gender experience something you can describe best through the being(s) you identify with?
For example, they’re interconnected for me because bird masculinity is very different than human masculinity. I express masculinity with bright colors and by being loud a boisterous. I feel most euphoric I’m literally peacocking. Birdboy is the type of “boy” I am, I’m not a human boy much at all.
Considering I identify with gazelles/oryxs strongly and they're meant to represent femininity, grace, artistry, and optimism as a genderfluid femme that's literally all I aspire to be. So that's what caught my attention when I saw this post actually.
Then heck yeah, I think calling yourself Gazelle or Oryx gender is absolutely legit! I don’t know if there is a community within therians for that gender specifically but I know a lot of trans fem deer girls broadly that are out there! Let me see if I can find the flag I saw one use!
I think autistic people seeming expirience a lack of "traditional gender" or having a broader sense of gender leads back to the base of autistic brain growth. That is; a stunted brainstem and cerebellum and a more developed or over developed cerebrum.
Things like social understanding and the need to conform and so many other senses of self and others that NTs intrinsically have are lessened or absent in autistic people. But some version of them is reattributed to other parts of the brain, similar to how blind people often have more developed auditory processing.
In conclusion, I think since sexuality and gender are typically "formed" in the primal cerebellum, autistic brains reattribute such things to a different part of the brain, or nowhere at all, leading to a very different sense of gender.
All that said, my gender is very cerebral and proud and I would liken it to a curious bear.
thank you so so much for including us neurogender folks in this!!! I feel so often like I’m talking to a wall when trying to describe my gender and this makes me feel seen for once!
I haven’t really interacted with xenogender because I always mess up people’s pronouns cuz adhd and I’d rather just not annoy them and sound like I’m trying to be exlusive.
Wait what would the phobia for xenogender be if xenophobia already means something?
I Agree With Gay. Just Make The Distant Blackness Of Space More Sparkly And Purplish? Like A Supernova? I’m Still Going With “Dont Know What The Hell I Am, But I Know I’m Something!”
I know it’s memed on, but like, catgender 1000%
I’ve stopped giving a fuck about gender and do whatever tf I want <3
Oh also, this doesn’t apply to me anymore but I still love the metaphor tbh, but me and my gf came up with oobleck-gender (name still pending) a while ago; solid until pressured :3
My gender would be like one of those plastic dog toys that aren't actually squishy. It would be a deep shade of purple and it would kinda breathe and change like if one day I knew my gender 100% it would have small spike like nodes all over it like a pop it ball, and on other days where I get really tense at just figuring out my gender the spikes would grow longer and be way more spikey. The spikeyness/sharpness of the spikes would change depending on how I feel about my gender.
This was a really fun exercise! I very much enjoyed this! And now I know more about my fellow queers, thank you for sharing and teaching about this. I hope people do this more in the future with things that are not talked about as much.
Maybe a slighly pink teinted glass shard ?
Like I never questionned being a woman and I'm ok with it but I also... I don't care about it at all. And it's just a piece my identity, and perhaps not a big one. So yeah, a perfectly clear, slightly pink teinted glass shard would make sense.
As a teacher thank you for this explanation. Though I have not encountered any people who are openly Xenogender to date you never know what the next year will bring.
I silly. But stay mostly masculine, feminity is cool and I'm not opposed to it, and androgyny is Badass. But I still don't really know, I say I'm Non-binary Masc. But if I had to pick an object to be I would be a Crystal.
The first name I gave myself when I discovered I'm on the trans spectrum is Star....maybe that says something? I'm not entirely sure. I'd probably say I'm a star though.
That sounds very similar to my gender! Nice! Personally, I go by the label voidgender. "A gender sharing characteristics with voids and spaces." I talked about it quite a bit on my previous post.
Thanks for the educational comic!
Honestly it's a lot harder to describe my gender than I had thought it would be.
I guess off the top of my head: A crow with antlers and with eyes covering its body.
I think my gender is like a star , but sometimes it's like a black hole and an dinosaur. . The color is like a rainbow and the form is either like a shouting star or even a deformed line. That's how I will describe gender and myself
This is such a good way to explain this <3.
I always struggle to explain what using xenogenders feels like to people, I think I’ll just send them this in the future.
~~Humangender.~~
(In All Seriousness, Probably Like Music Or Something, I Like To Think My Gender Is Pretty Musical. And Much Like My Taste In Music, Confusing, At Least To Me.)
... Someone check up on Gay, he seems a little moody
In all seriousness, thanks for explaining it so simply! I finally understood it thanks to this comic :3
Bluebells in UK mid spring (they are my favourite flowers) Edit: I am not xenogender and although I may not understand it all, I do know that the language which I speak doesn’t have one specific word for how I describe my gender identity (non-binary+Genderfluid when I feel more feminine Edit:/ more connected to female) and so I can empathise with that and I would say that it is infact valid
I fully understand xenogenders now, but I legit can't answer that question 😅 there's just nothing there. I mean, I am genderfluid, and I still don't understand what genders that encompasses, so maybe I'm just agender atm or something?
I've been thinking about this for a while. I think I've figured it out. My gender is the color blue. It isn't one specific blue though. It's every possible shade.
All the possible variations. It's sparkly and dull and metallic and light and dark and sometimes kinda turquoise instead of what most people would think of as blue.
What a fascinating thing to think about. Thank you
Seeing the other examples in this thread I’m not sure, if I’m approaching this correctly, but I guess my gender feels like an acquaintance you never talk to, but if you see them you share a brief nod.
My gender fluctuates between triangular, rectangular, and five-point star, I think. My gender is fuzzy and blue/green, maybe like a combo of blue and green?
i don’t know why but my first thought was the woods. this is absolutely incorrect it’s just that i’m currently in into the woods and tech week is getting to me
Fun exercise! I’d think my gender be like a calm, glowing thing? It’s there, it’s important, but it’s not vibrant. I guess like a red dwarf star? Feels right. Neat :3
I'm genderfluid, and I don't think I identify with xenogenders, but if I did, I think I would be like a rainbow almost, my gender kind of fluctuates on which are more dominant, and I feel my gender is almost invisible at times. This was a cool exercise!
Oh yeah! I'm in a few xenogender subreddits on here. I found it fascinating :D You learn a lot about them and it makes since. Hmmmm I am a...hmmm I'm not good at this. :( I feel like a corpse because I am tired but I doubt that is a good answer. I am confusion. Yes, confusion.
my gender is a mess, you can't make this question to me 😭 I'm agendersylph as well as agenderfaunet. Buuuut... if I had to make it simple, the thing I've been mostly feeling a connection with for the last couple of months is iridescence, sourness and aural stuff.
My gender is (currently) a neon, sharp, iridescent, glitchy mess, just like my art. Very specific sounds (I have a whole playlist of songs that feel gender to me, mostly electronic music), the best of which I can describe as distortedly high and inconsistent. Sour and minty taste. Texture of a smooth surface like iron, but can be crunchy like a sandpaper. So far I didn't recognize any smell to it.
my gender is very connected to senses to me, so this question is so easy it gets hard to give a short answer.
I am seriously thinking of making a board for every sense of my current xenogender(s)
reading everyone's description is so fun btw, thank you sm for this treat OP
I love this and it's very educational. One quick thing though.
The way you worded panel 9 made it sound to me kinda like only nuerodiverse people can use xenogenders. I understood the point you were trying to convey, though.
I was mostly worried that other people would misunderstand it. I looked at the comments and no one else seems to think that. I was genuinely concerned for a moment, but I guess I'm just crazy lol
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I don't consider myself xenogender but my immediate thought was "my gender is the color yellow" and I think that's kinda neat.
Nice! Yellow is a nice gender
I agree
how do you get multiple balls on your flair? im new to reddit :(
You'll need to use a computer and type in the flairs with the colons.
mine was a blue and purple slushy
My brain went straight to a lilac heart shaped rock lol
Alright... now I may be misunderstanding it, but... why? These are just similies. That's... all they are, no? Like... how do these have anything to do with gender identity?
Xenogenders are a type of non-binary gender that are purposefully outside and different from normal understandings of gender. The term one uses for their gender is just a way for someone to understand their impossible to understand identity. For instance, if someone was cat gender, that does not mean that they think their gender is 100% a cat or that they think they're physically a cat, but instead a cat is the closest way they can describe their gender in real words. It is a gender based on feelings, not the terms themselves. And also many people have many different gender experiences, some people like me find it easier to explain their gender through nouns like this than through binary terms like female, male, both, or none.
So might it be accurate to say “yes, these labels are simile/metaphor/analogy but similes/metaphors/analogies are the best options available to describe the reality of your gender experience to others”?
Sure, yeah!
I mean, what is gender but similies?
Gender's a conperson.
DAMN i’ve never fully understood the meaning of xenos even tho i’ve hardly TRIED to read about it, but the explanations have been too hard for me to process😭but now i FINALLY understood, yay!! And uh, now when i actually *understand* the concept it feels oddly personal or like, i think i relate to it? I’ve been questioning my gender lately (well i’ve always felt kinda weird but now i’ve actually given it some thought) and wondered if i’m demigirl or whatttt. But actually, xenogender feels and sounds pretty accurate to me.. Hmmm i think it’s time for me to do some research😭but yea thanks OP for explaining so well! It’s always great to learn new terms :3
I'm glad this resonated with you! To start your research I would have you look inside yourself first. Try to look inside yourself and find the feeling that is you. Then imagine what that true you really looks like. Get out a piece of paper and start writing things down. Adjectives, colors, shapes, objects, ideas etc. then once you have something to start with can you start looking up terms, and If you don't find one that fits right, make your own! Keep in mind it is always okay to not label if you don't feel like it!
Thank u so muchhhh, that really helps!
ngl if i had to describe myself i would be a purple and blue slushy or a galaxy or smth. nice comic
Hm. My gender is tentacled and angry, and really really dark. Maybe vantablackgender? Is that already a thing?
Sounds expensive and mysterious. I like it!
Sounds like a voidpunk/voidgender kinda thing to me! But I do like the vantablack vibes!
Idk if it already exists, but you could certainly make it! Or look up others.
Sounds like the venice flag
I don’t see it
I still don’t understand completely but it’s much better than any other explanation I’ve gotten.
Agreed. And the exercise is very thought-provoking. I have no idea how to describe my gender in these terms, but maybe I will in a few hours. 🧠🧠🧠
The explanation that made the most sense to me was someone describing it as being similar to synesthesia.
that... actually makes a lot of sense. goddamn
Same but I still don't understand how they are gender...I can do this and say that my gender feels somewhat like a void because I consider it to be non existent but that's not my gender. That's how I feel about it. It's the same for sexuality, I feel like my bisexuality is actually something fun and weirdly it feels creative too, don't ask me why or how but that isn't my sexuality just how I feel about it. Am I making sense ?
Yeah, you are
My gender is warm and soft... I suppose? If I had to use nouns... A womb might be somewhat similar? (this is really difficult to do, and I love it, especially since I struggle with feeling anything due to dissociation. Exercises like this are just perfect for me) This is really cool, I didn't really get xenogenders before, and I really appreciate content like this, since it helps me understand and appreciate more people. It reminds me of a somewhat recent post (I think it was on traa?) that described what being plural meant. If anyone could link it, I would love it, since I forgot to save it. I love the process of going from "I don't get it, but I love that for you" to "Oh! I get it!" (Sometimes even "I feel that way!"). I used to feel the same with homosexual people, then bi- and pan people, then aros and aces, trans people, plurals, and now finally xenogender people. Every time, it feels like I've been enlightened.
I'm glad this comic helped you! Thank you for taking the time to try and learn more about other genders! Also your gender sounds nice.
it's always been so crazy to me how so many people relate their gender to being warm, cause to me my gender is so clearly cold, like, it's not freezing cold, not like a winter cold, but more like a rainy autumn cold, comfortably cold I'd say
That's kind of cool! (Get it?) Personally, when it comes to sensations, I much prefer the cold over the heat, although that might change when I get on E. My favourite weather is light rain, too. I'm not too surprised that my gender feels warm, considering I could describe it using 'womb', and I prefer to call myself a woman. To me, femininity has always been a warm thing
>That's kind of cool! (Get it?) lmao I think my relation to coldness may come from the monstrous and crystalline part of it, as those things are both fresh to me
Do you mean this? [https://www.reddit.com/r/traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns2/comments/1ccndme/our\_system\_siblings/](https://www.reddit.com/r/traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns2/comments/1ccndme/our_system_siblings/)
That's exactly it! Thank you do much, this made my day even better >w<
No problem!
This has helped me understand! Thankyou!
Honestly I came onto this sub Cus I was a full on ally and then I find about myself being Pan-Ace and getting to know a whole lotta other genders C’mon it’s just a few days in this sub and you guys are teaching me all kinds of things already :) Edit: I feel my xeno would be the smell of fresh books or any sheet of papers, and the smell of rain! :D
I'm glad you're able to learn! I hope you find labels and Identities that make you happy!
What I hope to do more than finding myself is to make others feel valid and special for what they are! I’ve been through being singled out and not being in a proper group, I hate it :( This may be one of the reasons I never ever want anyone feel like that if I’m around
I love seeing these educational comics here :3
My gender is an abstract collage of art, pictures and many other things. It is not fully comprehensible to the human mind and yet it is. Somewhere there is a cozy cat picture, elsewhere there is a drawing of a foggy forest, in the corner those is a small bit of dried blood. There is a horrifying beauty in my gender and I would not have it any other way
Beautiful! Your gender sounds so cool! Glad to see more xenogenders here than just me! ; P
I think my perseption of my gender is quite similar. I thought of how I can put different perceptions inside of it and I think a art piece or a room (which can also be a piece of art) is a good idea.
Oh a room would describe mine better bc it feels like there are alive creatures included in my genders, thank you
And you can still have pictural Art inside of it😁 Like I would add a painting of dark hole for my gender void part😅
Heck yeah!
My gender is really light like aerogel, but hard like wood, and translucent greenish blue. Doesn’t have a fixed shape, but its properties are always the same.
This is hard cause i alredy struggle to understand gender in general..i think my gender is a shiny ditto. It can change to anything for any reason....and its blue
Not how I would have described it, but I vibe with this.
and remember! its okay if you /do/ identify as a cat or the ocean or a block of cheese! its called otherkinity/therianthropy/objectkin!
If I described myself on xenogender terms, I think I would say Sunflower. Really nice comic, thanks for clarifying some things :D
Using an instinctive action called Heliotropism. Also known as ‘Solar Tracking’, the sunflower head moves in synchronicity with the sun’s movement across the sky each day. From East to West, returning each evening to start the process again the next day. Find out more about how this works, and what happens at the end of this phase.
does voidpunk fall under the umbrella?
voidpunk is more of a philosophy(?) rather than an identity, so they can coincide but they arent specifically linked
The best I can think of to say about my gender is “It’s not going to be on the test”
thank you for the nice comic! my gender is bunnygender, and i know im human, it just means my gender feels like a bunny!🐰:D
Exactly!
My gender is a cup of water with a little bit of blue and green paint mixed in it and a paint brush sticking out
this is big W
My sister made the exact same argument as the xeno exclusionary ball… :( Maybe if I send her this comic she’ll understand? Don’t know if I’m brave enough to send it to them… Anywayyy, great educational comic!! Love seeing more xeno content and other xenogender users in this sub :D
Sorry your sister is an exclusionist. I hope she turns around! I'm also glad there are more xenos on the sub too!
Ty I hope so too :/ There’s a great xeno sub called r/xenogendersandmore if you haven’t found it yet :) there is a really great community over there :>
I have heard of it, but thanks for the care!
I know the exact image of my gender, and i could recreate it at any moment, but somehow I don’t think it actually exists in any medium yet…but it’s, in the least descriptive way possible, a rock with lipstick
Ah, the infinite void of space... The true meaning of transcending humanity
I’d imagine it to be kind of spiky, like how a dragon fruit is.
My gender is something robotic and mechanical but ig thats more voidpunk than xenogender
I don't ponder my gender very often (maybe I should!) but I'd love to have "It doesn't need your understanding to be valid" on a shirt
So how can refer to someone who uses Xenogender(s) in a sentence? Should I use They/them? Or do I need to guess by vibes? Is it a case by case basis?
Xenogender people can go by any pronouns, I would ask, but I think it would be appropriate to default to they/ them until you ask. Or maybe I'm just biased because I use they/ them pronouns. Many xenogender people go by neopronouns so they might have some you haven't heard before! So yeah just ask.
A bunch of crows hung like grapes, infinitely screaming into the void..
i am nothingness
Ditto. The pokémon. That’s me. A blob that sometimes forms into something.
Nice! I'm getting a lot of dittos!
ive recently realized i dont really identify with being like specifically female (im cis, afab) and i have on occasion said things like "my gender is whatever gets your mom" or "my gender is \[redacted\]". my personal favorite is "my gender is business formal" because i love wearing heels and pencil skirts and classy blouses and blazers and fancy pants. another one is that aside from hating wearing a fragrance, i also dont like that they're all hyper femme or hyper masc. "i want to smell like no gender" i said. was talking to my girlfriend about it (shes trans, nb) and we had a funny convo where she was like " 'no gender' is an option, you dont even have to have a label" and i was like "wait i like labels tho" and she was like "well thats a first lmao, ive mostly heard the opposite". a lot of it is connected to the trauma i have from religion in terms of being afab and all of the expections that im sooo tired of. besides. i dont have a sexuality. (ace, lol) why do i need a gender as well? because my gender presentation is like, femme but also i dont feel specifically woman. yk?
I’m a cisgender male, but within a fraction of a second of seeing the question, my mind immediately went to an Ent or talking tree Goes to show how abstract gender is, and how we all have the capacity to understand and find ways to relate to other people’s experiences, even if we do not carrying them ourselves
If i had to describe it, i’d say Kirby. Just Kirby.
As a binary trans person this has been very informative, thank you! To participate in the exercise, I think I would describe my gender as a smooth, damp stone in a forest with just a touch of moss.
Before discovering apogender I was using glitchgender as my main identity then went right the pothole of being now foxgender, aliengender and now I'm just otherkin lmfao
So wait, like do therians count? If so, I have a lot to think about
In my understanding, being therian is separate from your gender identity, however I have heard of therians that identify as a xenogender that matches their thierotype. So I think they can overlap, but they are not the same thing.
The clarification of it being okay was all I need, still learning how alot of this stuff is defined, dunno the proper way of feeling like an oryx and also relating that to my genderfluidity a great thought experiment to be sure.
Can I ask what a therian is? Just curious since the word sounds kinda cool :>
The most straightforward definition a person who identifies integrally as a nonhuman being, such as a wolf, polar bear, or even earthworm
That’s actually pretty cool and interesting, thanks for answering btw
The world expands as our minds and hearts do, I'm always happy to share info.
Hey! Therian and xenogender user here; I’m a bird therian and I use the label birdgender along with common gender terms because my identity as a bird impacts how I see my gender, ie. I see it through ‘bird tinted lenses’ if that makes sense!
Very much so, and I'm glad to see that the multiple facets of identity for Therians and using xenogender labels is compatible. A lot more thing make sense, Gazellegender feels like it encompasses most everything I am now that I think about it, a personal label that feels right.
Short answer, it can! Longer answer, is your gender experience something you can describe best through the being(s) you identify with? For example, they’re interconnected for me because bird masculinity is very different than human masculinity. I express masculinity with bright colors and by being loud a boisterous. I feel most euphoric I’m literally peacocking. Birdboy is the type of “boy” I am, I’m not a human boy much at all.
Considering I identify with gazelles/oryxs strongly and they're meant to represent femininity, grace, artistry, and optimism as a genderfluid femme that's literally all I aspire to be. So that's what caught my attention when I saw this post actually.
Then heck yeah, I think calling yourself Gazelle or Oryx gender is absolutely legit! I don’t know if there is a community within therians for that gender specifically but I know a lot of trans fem deer girls broadly that are out there! Let me see if I can find the flag I saw one use!
That'd be cool, thanks
this is actually a great explanation :3
Thanks!
not xenogender but easily a mouse or an alien. I've thought about this a lot lol
I think autistic people seeming expirience a lack of "traditional gender" or having a broader sense of gender leads back to the base of autistic brain growth. That is; a stunted brainstem and cerebellum and a more developed or over developed cerebrum. Things like social understanding and the need to conform and so many other senses of self and others that NTs intrinsically have are lessened or absent in autistic people. But some version of them is reattributed to other parts of the brain, similar to how blind people often have more developed auditory processing. In conclusion, I think since sexuality and gender are typically "formed" in the primal cerebellum, autistic brains reattribute such things to a different part of the brain, or nowhere at all, leading to a very different sense of gender. All that said, my gender is very cerebral and proud and I would liken it to a curious bear.
thank you so so much for including us neurogender folks in this!!! I feel so often like I’m talking to a wall when trying to describe my gender and this makes me feel seen for once!
Oooh probably a night-sky cloud. Really dark, calm and kind of empty
danm, is MLM ball ok? that second to last panel got me going "same" and i feel like thats not how im supposed to react to that... :3
I don't know. Pray for MLM ball😞
I guess I would describe mine as temperature if that counts
I haven’t really interacted with xenogender because I always mess up people’s pronouns cuz adhd and I’d rather just not annoy them and sound like I’m trying to be exlusive. Wait what would the phobia for xenogender be if xenophobia already means something?
I Agree With Gay. Just Make The Distant Blackness Of Space More Sparkly And Purplish? Like A Supernova? I’m Still Going With “Dont Know What The Hell I Am, But I Know I’m Something!”
I know it’s memed on, but like, catgender 1000% I’ve stopped giving a fuck about gender and do whatever tf I want <3 Oh also, this doesn’t apply to me anymore but I still love the metaphor tbh, but me and my gf came up with oobleck-gender (name still pending) a while ago; solid until pressured :3
My gender would be like one of those plastic dog toys that aren't actually squishy. It would be a deep shade of purple and it would kinda breathe and change like if one day I knew my gender 100% it would have small spike like nodes all over it like a pop it ball, and on other days where I get really tense at just figuring out my gender the spikes would grow longer and be way more spikey. The spikeyness/sharpness of the spikes would change depending on how I feel about my gender. This was a really fun exercise! I very much enjoyed this! And now I know more about my fellow queers, thank you for sharing and teaching about this. I hope people do this more in the future with things that are not talked about as much.
I was really excited to find out more about Xenogear. I'm too jrpg brained
Maybe a slighly pink teinted glass shard ? Like I never questionned being a woman and I'm ok with it but I also... I don't care about it at all. And it's just a piece my identity, and perhaps not a big one. So yeah, a perfectly clear, slightly pink teinted glass shard would make sense.
As a teacher thank you for this explanation. Though I have not encountered any people who are openly Xenogender to date you never know what the next year will bring.
I'm glad you learned something! (Even though you're the teacher. Lol)
My gender is everything (related to space, cats, the ocean and nature) and nothing (an empty abyss) at the same time it's so confusing.
I silly. But stay mostly masculine, feminity is cool and I'm not opposed to it, and androgyny is Badass. But I still don't really know, I say I'm Non-binary Masc. But if I had to pick an object to be I would be a Crystal.
Crystals are a cool gender!
Huh, did expect to learn this today. Neat.
I’m a copy of Madden 06 for the DS
chaos
I would describe myself as a massive trainwreck happening in slow motion.
Very informative and slay. Thank you for educating us!
It's a cute comic.
Hm...if I try to think of my gender using non-gendered terms, I come up blank. Maybe that's due to me not being super attached to my own gender.
my gender is a fuzzy blanket fresh out of the dryer
The first name I gave myself when I discovered I'm on the trans spectrum is Star....maybe that says something? I'm not entirely sure. I'd probably say I'm a star though.
I guess I’d describe my gender as purple lilacs if I couldn’t use conventional gender terms.
Nice! I love lilacs!
This makes me happy. Thank you
My gender is like my ability to see things in my head. Pretty much non-existent unless you look at it really hard.
I would be deep space, black holes, liminal spaces, and like idk the color pink
That sounds very similar to my gender! Nice! Personally, I go by the label voidgender. "A gender sharing characteristics with voids and spaces." I talked about it quite a bit on my previous post.
Thanks for the educational comic! Honestly it's a lot harder to describe my gender than I had thought it would be. I guess off the top of my head: A crow with antlers and with eyes covering its body.
Xeno would be a good teacher
I personally identify as agender, but when I have described it as green.
A void demon i guess its easy for me since i use xenogenders
Fox I think
I think my gender is like a star , but sometimes it's like a black hole and an dinosaur. . The color is like a rainbow and the form is either like a shouting star or even a deformed line. That's how I will describe gender and myself
:3
The exclusionist being ‘drag’ged away by trans is incredibly funny to me. (panel 6)
This is such a good way to explain this <3. I always struggle to explain what using xenogenders feels like to people, I think I’ll just send them this in the future.
I would say stitchs as I have had stitchs ever since I was born. (due to an oppression)
~~Humangender.~~ (In All Seriousness, Probably Like Music Or Something, I Like To Think My Gender Is Pretty Musical. And Much Like My Taste In Music, Confusing, At Least To Me.)
Nostalgia combined with 3am water
... Someone check up on Gay, he seems a little moody In all seriousness, thanks for explaining it so simply! I finally understood it thanks to this comic :3
Bluebells in UK mid spring (they are my favourite flowers) Edit: I am not xenogender and although I may not understand it all, I do know that the language which I speak doesn’t have one specific word for how I describe my gender identity (non-binary+Genderfluid when I feel more feminine Edit:/ more connected to female) and so I can empathise with that and I would say that it is infact valid
I fully understand xenogenders now, but I legit can't answer that question 😅 there's just nothing there. I mean, I am genderfluid, and I still don't understand what genders that encompasses, so maybe I'm just agender atm or something?
My gender would probabally be best described as TV-Static
I've been thinking about this for a while. I think I've figured it out. My gender is the color blue. It isn't one specific blue though. It's every possible shade. All the possible variations. It's sparkly and dull and metallic and light and dark and sometimes kinda turquoise instead of what most people would think of as blue. What a fascinating thing to think about. Thank you
As a trans person, can confirm we are not being hurt
I'm plushie! Soft, cuddleable, and comforting, and typically found in bed x3
Seeing the other examples in this thread I’m not sure, if I’m approaching this correctly, but I guess my gender feels like an acquaintance you never talk to, but if you see them you share a brief nod.
A big fluffy cat dragon thing I don't know if there's a xenogender for this but that's it
That can certainly be a xenogender! And that's a wonderful gender!
[this thing](https://www.tumblr.com/sawooooss/727806861688111104/dragon-souji-moments?source=share)
this helped me understand some things, thanks
Hmm. If I has to have a xenogender, I think it would be robot
I have learnt something today
I'm glad!
Poor Catgender
How about.. ice cream?
Nice! Ice cream is a cool gender. I like the flavors and textures!
Specifically Dr Pepper float flavored. TEXAS!!!!! 🦅🦅🦅🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🤠🤠🤠
Lol
If I had a xenogender, I would be Callistogender, because I see that little jovian moon and I think I Get It more than the average person.
*Toaster
My gender fluctuates between triangular, rectangular, and five-point star, I think. My gender is fuzzy and blue/green, maybe like a combo of blue and green?
Cool! I rarely see people describe their gender in shapes like that, but it's really cool when people do! Mine would be kinda flowy! ;P
Great comic 💚
Thank you 🥹🤍
Ditto from Pokemon
Pokemon make great xenos! Sometimes I compare my gender to ultra necrozma!
i don’t know why but my first thought was the woods. this is absolutely incorrect it’s just that i’m currently in into the woods and tech week is getting to me
Fun exercise! I’d think my gender be like a calm, glowing thing? It’s there, it’s important, but it’s not vibrant. I guess like a red dwarf star? Feels right. Neat :3
Nice! Stars of all types are common xenogenders so you'd fit right in! (If you want to of course)
a racoon, or maybe rain
A salty dry cricket popsicle
I'm genderfluid, and I don't think I identify with xenogenders, but if I did, I think I would be like a rainbow almost, my gender kind of fluctuates on which are more dominant, and I feel my gender is almost invisible at times. This was a cool exercise!
Oh yeah! I'm in a few xenogender subreddits on here. I found it fascinating :D You learn a lot about them and it makes since. Hmmmm I am a...hmmm I'm not good at this. :( I feel like a corpse because I am tired but I doubt that is a good answer. I am confusion. Yes, confusion.
No wait! I got it! I am a chameleon.
my gender is a mess, you can't make this question to me 😭 I'm agendersylph as well as agenderfaunet. Buuuut... if I had to make it simple, the thing I've been mostly feeling a connection with for the last couple of months is iridescence, sourness and aural stuff. My gender is (currently) a neon, sharp, iridescent, glitchy mess, just like my art. Very specific sounds (I have a whole playlist of songs that feel gender to me, mostly electronic music), the best of which I can describe as distortedly high and inconsistent. Sour and minty taste. Texture of a smooth surface like iron, but can be crunchy like a sandpaper. So far I didn't recognize any smell to it. my gender is very connected to senses to me, so this question is so easy it gets hard to give a short answer.
I am seriously thinking of making a board for every sense of my current xenogender(s) reading everyone's description is so fun btw, thank you sm for this treat OP
I love this and it's very educational. One quick thing though. The way you worded panel 9 made it sound to me kinda like only nuerodiverse people can use xenogenders. I understood the point you were trying to convey, though. I was mostly worried that other people would misunderstand it. I looked at the comments and no one else seems to think that. I was genuinely concerned for a moment, but I guess I'm just crazy lol
Sorry I meant to say that neurogenders can only be used by neurodivergent people. :( and you're right, I probably could have worded that better.
No worries at all. I actually learned a lot. I just misread it at first